#Anxious ass being insecure AGAIN 😭 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mvltisstuff · 9 months

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plz do some conrad head cannons i loved ur cam ones🙏🙏🙏

hc’s for conrad!!

babe

anyway

i feel like conrad would be a little tough to crack open at first, like he’d open up slowly but surely

once he does, he adores when people genuinely listen to him and help him process

when he feels comfortable, if he has a panic attack, he knows he can go to you for comfort and he doesn’t have to be afraid

if you’re anxious, he’s def the type of guy to hold you until you calm down, and then talk about it if you still want to

before susannah’s death, she always noticed his smile get bigger when he was with you and it always reappeared after her death

i feel like bro def would get a good therapist (someone get him one ‼️)

he pretends to hate the nickname connie but secretly loves it whenever you say it

gets turned on by the most random things, even if they’re little

i know him and jere have their little moments but i feel like he’d genuinely do anything for his little brother

keep in mind i haven’t read the books so i’m not fully sure what happens 😭 i know some major plot points but no details really

if you get insecure, he always slyly shoots out little compliments and makes sure other people say you look amazing (you do)

he’s usually civil, but the second someone says something to you, it’s game over

FUCKS UP mario kart wii and had to finish jeremiah’s laps for him when they were younger

wants to call people his best friend, but isn’t sure if he’s theirs (same)

i think once he learns how to properly communicate (no hate), he would have a really good relationship with you

if you argue about something, he stays up all night thinking about it in fear of losing you. even if he thinks he’s right, he’ll try and make it up to you

bro i know the fishers grew up drinking milk with dinner every. single. night.

i feel like he would be cold a lot (idk why) but he always curls up more to you if he does

definitely active on twitter and always retweets the weird, funny tweets (or x i guess, kiss my ass elon!)

whenever he’s soaking wet, it’s a must that he runs up to you and shakes his hair and pecks your cheek (cannon???)

bro has a blankie idc (this is me projecting)

this is so mean but he 100% scared susannah whenever she walked into a room (probably before being diagnosed again 💀)

has a private story that he NEVER uses unless it’s to post embarrassing pics of everyone else

made his snap username something so humiliating and shut down whenever someone mentioned it

cried tears of joy when the update came out where you could change it

i tried to add a few silly ones in there, but i hope you enjoy these <3

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killuaisaprincess · 1 year

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😐,🤔,👨‍👧‍👧 and 🍰 for the ask game?

Thank uuuu 🥺🤲🙏 sometimes I wish I knew who anons were so I could aggressively give them love, but I know that’s the point, and people can be shy, etc. ask game

😐 What embarrasses you most about your own writing?

Nothing, really! It wasn't always that way, butttt, when there really isn't anyone writing what you wanna read (minus Wifey blows kisses)... when I started rereading my stuff after I posted it, had an epiphany. This is a certified amazing, whattttt? I actually love this. Wow, I know, amazing me; I like what I write for me. Astonishing, me.

But 'till I remade and had to edit and repost everything, I was like... why didn't I reread this stuff sooner? Insecurity, really, but! That was the biggest confidence booster; I just kinda stopped caring that, yes, objectively speaking, my writing could be or maybe is ass, but I no longer saw it. Instead, I saw damm can't wait to read this later; ooooh, excited! I've always had fun writing, but until like a year and a half ago, I didn't really re-read my stuff? I was missing outtt. I mean I wrote them for me!

So I guess I used to get too anxious and embarrassed to re-read my stuff, so everything about my writing in a way. I was insecure, thought if I re-read this, what if it's trash writing, and I no longer love it cuz it's badly written, even if its my niches I love? But jokes on me; I love my stuff, esp. the newer stuff, even more now, haha.

🤔 What is the hardest part of writing fic?

Not the writing, lol. But, really. The writing is fun; it’s everything that surrounds it. My ADD brain wanting to write at the worse times when I’m busy. My ADD brain giving me too many wips, which, I don’t mind, but I’m sure my one or two readers are sick of, like, boo, you whore xd. Editing. The best part of editing is being able to reread my stuff; then, the worse is everything else. And writer's block…. that brings my mood down so much, my mortal enemy. YEAH, I DON'T SEE WHY I CAN'T WRITE EVERYDAY, BRAIN?! What’s the issue, brain?!

👨‍👧‍👧 Do you tell people in real life that you write fic?

Not explicitly! My sister knows, and she’ll even drop a comment on my stuff when I’m feeling down without even reading the fic 😂. But it’s okay, I appreciate you, Pink 🥺🤧🙏 I probably wouldn’t tell my coworkers, but yeah, I have no problems offhandedly mentioning fic.

🍰 Name one of your fave comfort fics (doesn’t have to be your all time fave).

As much as I actually, really, really wish I could shell another writer that isn’t myself or Wifey <3 @primrosekisse, There aren’t many Gonkillu writers, and I’m super picky with my interpretations on top of it. I rarely risk reading fic (I will try every 5 months and cry) unless Wifey posts; we are connected same/similar headcanons! So my comfort fics are hers and my own. B-but if anyone ever finds a GK fic and then on top of it, it’s got similarities to my headcanons b-bwease. 🥺🙏😭😭😭😭

My comfort fic of hers is Beauty and the Beast AU! Although I read all of Prim’s things again (esp when I really just wanna cry about lack of GK) and need that good shit.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28904382 As for my ownnnn, kinda hard to pick since I got a personal connection with them all, I love love all my more recent works as I feel I finally have a style I love and I just stopped giving a fuck what anyone thinks, so I’m really even more so going in and writing what I want, but my old stuff will always hold a place in my heart. I’ll cheat lol. Here’s a new one that’s a comfort:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/37499644

And an old one: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31349027/chapters/78127517

WAS MY FIRST KI IS A PRINCESS, SO HOW COULD I NOT 🥺😭🙏🤧🤲

#personal #Thank uuuu 🥺🙏#I don’t get the chance to talk about my fics a lot #well unless I’m doing it on my own but 🤲🤲🤲#my tags aren’t a mile long becuz all my talking was done in the post while usually I mean it would be outta place to talk in the post 😭😅🥹#So I do it in the tags #It’s been two years and yet I feel like a billion have passed and I’ve changed so #much haha BEST YEAR SO FAR 🥺😤 some bad stuff did happen this year but new job I like and lots of fun time for my babey Ki and video games

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dulcewrites · 9 months

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I want to discuss one thing very controversial yet interesting regarding both Aegon and Aemond. TGC said Aegon thinks his family hates him and he is a disappointment from day 1, while it's clear Alicent loves him even though she rarely showes it. Yes, I won't deny, her parenting style is not perfect, but she tries her best with Aegon. However, I fully understand why Aegon doesn't see it as her love. She yells at him, hits him and speaks harsh words to his face. And then there is one moment when Meleys threatens him and Alicent steps in. Yes, her love really shines in here. But I think overall Aegon has heard lots of harsh words and received harsh treatment and one moment with Meleys can't erase it. That's why he asks if she loves him. It's important to him, obviously, but on if he was sure, he wouldn't have asked. Alicent isn't good at communicating her love through words and Aegon craves positive words of affirmation.

And there is Aemond. Ewan said he has never felt unconditional love from his family and many people said he didn't understand Aemond because Alicent and Helaena love him. And again, it's very similar to Aegon's case, it's just that people are too stupid to notice it imo. Ewan said Aemond never FELT meaning in Aemond's mind they have never loved him for who he was. He didn't say they never showed him their love, he said he never felt like this so I think Alicent showed him her unconditional mind, but in Aemond's insecure mind it didn't look like unconditional. It has nothing to do with Alicent and her displays of affection towards him, more with Aemond's insecurities, how he always wanted to prove himself so then people will love him and since one could always prove himself just one more time to finally be enough, it's neverending list of his attempts to show he is worth of affection. I think he thinks himself as undeserving of love, that he can't get it freely, he has to earn it and it's neverending cycle imo. I think many people lack reading comprehension in these one and some understanding regarding how insecurities work. Doesn't matter how many times someone assures you that you're enough, in your mind it's still more to do, more love to receive once you'll try harder to gain it. It just shows how big capacity Aemond has for love and how much he craves to be loved. I understand you are not in the mood lately, but please don't delete this question, I'd like to know your opinion so badly especially after you wrote in one of your asks that in your opinion Aemond has a subconscious need to be loved.

Ngl this sat in my asks box for a minute bc I sort of didn’t know what to add??

Tbh I don’t think saying Aemond has a need to be loved needs more explanation??? From me… from you… from ewan who literally plays him. Mainly bc most people desire being liked, wanted, loved etc. it’s not a foreign concept even if there are people around who do claim to love them. If people don’t get that, maybe they just aren’t… smart or paying enough attention to his character. If they don’t get that a kid that was bullied, maimed with no justice, neglected by his father, and someone who had to depend on his equally anxious mother would not feel unconditionally loved, that’s on them. They are entitled to their own wrong opinion and as someone who likes show Aemond and enjoys my show Aemond bubble - irdgaf what they think 😭

———

As for Aegon… how can I put this without people on my ass about it lmao. I think the way people want to paint Alicent as this horrible person, who has this mortal flaw for not ‘treating her kids well’. But then you have the people that completely overlook her relationship with her children and the cycle of trauma that is being repeated. It’s hard because there is this stigma of women being defined by their relationship with their kids (especially their boys, and it’s even more compounded in a world like the one hotd is set in). Also very rigid confines of what qualifies someone as being a ‘good mother’. It often strips women of the life and feelings they have not only towards their children but outside of them. On the flip side, motherhood and how it drives her decision making is a big part of Alicent’s journey. Much of what she does is for her children. They are all she has. But the way Alicent became a mother is not something that should be pushed to the side just because she loves them. It is something that needs to be present when discussing how her kids are treated and or why they feel the way they do

I’m not saying this is what you are doing anon, so please don’t take this wrong, but there’s this weird rhetoric around how Alicent should be more kind towards her kids - mainly Aegon and Helaena (Aegon in specific). I think it is fair to say, whether you like him or not, he hasn’t necessarily endeared himself to Alicent. It’s ok to say that even if he is a character you enjoy. Maybe pre ep 8, you could make the argument she’s ‘too harsh’. But as someone with trauma of my own when it comes to assault, I don’t like policing behavior. Aegon is a personification of her pain and the tower she has been placed in; that is what makes his relationship with her interesting. She can’t stand him at times - she’ll go to the ends of the earth for him. Then post ep 8 Aegon…. it’s weird to me that on one hand people admonish her for not being mean enough, as if she has the power to like send him away or something. But at the same time, those same people call her cunt and saying he is no son of hers or the slap???

Imo the conversation rest less on Aegon, and what he deserves or what he is doing. Because when people talk about Aegon, very rarely is it just to talk about his behavior - it is to either to discuss how Alicent is the root of his pain or blame her not doing enough afterwards. It all comes back to how Alicent needs to do this or that to be a better mother. I simply don’t care enough to have the conversation with most people in this fandom bc ‘rape victim having a complicated relationship the products of said rape is ok and real’ and ‘everyone, including Aegon, is going through some sort of trauma’ can coexist. And lots of people don’t see that on either side. The way Alicent and Aegon feel about their relationship can coexist with each other.

Like just the fact the conversation seems to always be framed around ‘well Aegon recieved [insert treatment] from Alicent’ and ‘not Viserys also has something to do with Aegon acting the way he does and should be blamed for making Alicent have Aegon then leaving her to raise him alone’ says something imo

#like idk if this answers anything bc tbh I didn’t know what you wanted me to say 😭 these are just ramblings I guess #the ‘Alicent should be nicer to appease people’ convo gives me the ick #once again.. not saying this what that anon is doing #but the rhetoric is a slippery slope and annoys me #hotd talk

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serenity-songbird · 2 years

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Eyyyy! <333

May I get Butters, Kyle, Cartman with reader who has anxiety and avoidant personality disorder?? was diagnosed with them just today + im taking antidepressants hihi <3 if u wanna add, then insomnia i have it diagnosed too~~~ headcanons and romantic pls pls!

As a person diagnosed with Anxiety and insomnia, I completely understand the struggle. 😭😭😭 Thank you for the request. I just want you to know that dispite not knowing you, I already love and accept you. ❤❤❤

-Butters is a sweet little angel and will tend to each and everyone of your needs.

-If you are ever feeling uncomfortable around other people, he will pull you away and take you to your comfort place.

-Expect cuddles and kisses under the blanket while watching TV.

-Holds your hand everywhere you go and it makes you feel safe and secure.

-Whenever you can't sleep, he will face chat you and keep you company. (He tries not to get caught, but he may or may not have been grounded a few times because of it).

-He will sing you lullabies until you fall asleep.

-If you're ever having a panic attack he will pull you close and hug and kiss you until you calm down.

-If anyone is bullying you he will pull you away from the situation since he can't fight them off himself.

-Professor chaos, however, will rip those bullies to shreds.

-You also make him feel more important and confident. Because if he can get a beautiful soul like yours to love you, then he must not be so bad.

-Butters loves you and he will never make you feel bad about yourself and will do everything in his power to make you feel special and wanted.

-He will not understand you at all at first. When you first met he probably made you feel worse about yourself If we are being honest.

-It wasn't until one day when Cartman was once again trying to become a victim that he even noticed you.

-He was threatening to kill himself and no one took him seriously. He didn't want to show it, but it made him feel like nobody cared. He stood at on the edge of the bridge that day and actually contemplated it.

-Then here you coming along, carrying a goodie bag with his favorite snacks. "Don't do it. I know you think no one cares, but if you died, your mother would be heartbroken. Others would miss you too. So keep living, okay? Because even though you can be mean to me sometimes, even I wouldn't want you dead."

-Those words touched his heart in a way no one else has before. He was a lot nicer to you after that.

-You saw a side of him no one else did and because of that he wanted to understand you too.

-If anyone made you feel insecure or harrassed you, he would make them into chilli.

-Will kiss you and cuddle you when you are alone.

-Can't sleep? He'll stay up and watch movie with you.

-Anxious? He will yell at everyone to get away from you. (Though that may or may not make you even more anxious, but he is trying his best okay).

-Despite at one point being the cause of your disorder, he turned it around and ended up helping you become more self confident.

-First things first. This man literally has a schedule on your meds. He will always remind you to take them. They are to help you feel better and you wants you to be okay.

-Will absolutely kick everybody's ass if they make you feel insecure or anxious. (This may be a constant in all my headcanons, but that's because it is literally canon. He will punch first, ask questions later).

-He absolutely adores you and feels the need to protect you.

-Will come up with methods that will help you with dealing with your anxiety and will search up ways to cure you insomnia. (They may not always work, but you appreciate the effort).

-Will make you feel loved, important, and beautiful.

-You are his biggest supporter so of course he is yours.

-Loves it when you lean your head on his shoulder while you are cuddling or watching TV or whatever.

-Will put his arm around your shoulder, pull you close, and kisses your temple.

-Will sneak kisses when his friend's aren't looking, because you just look so cute.

-If you have a panic attack, he will do breathing excersises he saw online with you so you don't pass out.

-His main priority is that you are safe and healthy. So be prepared for nagging if he thinks you aren't taking care of yourself.

-Kyle may be a bit overprotective, but you love him with all your heart and you make each other happy.

#south park x reader #kyle x reader #cartman x reader #butters x reader #south park

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