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totallysora · 3 months

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West Side Story (2021)

I HAVE SM TO SAY ABT THIS MOVIE IT’S UNREAL 😭 Ok so I finally decided to watch it for the first time in like,,early January and it has actually changed me 😭 IT WAS SO GOOD?? LIKE THE CASTING WAS JUST MWAH I LOVED IT SM 😕 Anyways here are some of the things (from what I can remember, I haven’t actually had time to rewatch it since 😔) that I loved about it!

MAJOR SPOILER WARNING!!

The jets were amazing, fight me

Ik that’s kinda controversial cuz they’re horrible people, and yes I absolutely get that, and do not support their actions at all (If ur a jets apologist pls leave 🥰) but GOD THE CASTING?? UGH IT WAS JUST SO PERFECT 😭 All of their songs were literally so good?? The Jet song is unfairly catchy, and Gee, Officer Krupke?? It was actually magical (THIS IS WHY WE CAST BWAY ACTORS IN MUSICAL MOVIES PEOPLE 😻‼️)

That scene with Anita?? It honestly made my blood boil, which is actually like,,the best thing ever?? Ik that sounds horrible but I mean it in a way that if a scene is meant to make you feel disgusted, or completely angry, and it succeeds?? That’s how u know it was good acting

On the topic of the Jets, MIKE FAIST?? UM HELLO WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK HE WAS PERFECT CASTING IT’S UNREAL

I struggle to differentiate between actors and characters, so the whole rumble scene was a lil bit of a mess for me at first cuz I adore Mike sm, however when I thought abt it more, and how Riff acted, I was able to think of him as Riff, not Mike, and realised holy shit yea he actually kinda deserved what happened to him yk

THE RUMBLE OML 😭 THE ACTING WAS JUST SO UGH I LOVED IT SM - Unliked in the 1961 version (which I haven’t actually watched but have seen clips of!) you could actually tell it was like,,serious yk?? And when Riff got stabbed?? Holy fuck the emotion in that scene was unreal

Also the way David and Ansel acted straight after it happened?? I kinda got a ‘I didn’t actually want to kill him’ kinda feel from Bernardo, and honestly I kinda felt for him man 😭

I love the way that this rlly showed why Tony was the leader of the Jets, the way he beats Bernardos ass?? You can see why he led such a strong gang

Completely unrelated but the fact that this whole thing was basically a newsies reunion 💀

like Mike, Kyle, Jess, BEN? GARRETT?? THE TWINS???

I will forever adore the casting tho like honestly it was so good

Also the Sharks were robbed of screen time Icl 😭 They deffo should’ve been on screen more man

RACHEL MF ZEGLER 😻‼️ The fact that this was her debut will literally never not shock me

Like this girl was 17 and could sing like that?? No wonder ppl love her sm like damn 😭

People can actually fight me on this but Ansel was such good casting for Tony

I’ve seen people bash him for it but he was literally so good?? Like sorry but I refuse to accept anyone else (obviously excluding bway lmao)

On the topic of Tony the ending actually made me cry?? Like I was fine untik they picked him up and started carrying him after he got shot 😭

Icl halfway through the movie I googled if anyone died so I was prepared for it to happen but doesn’t mesn I didn’t still cry 😕

ARIANA DEBOSE 😻‼️ HER ANITA WAS SO PERFECT OML 😭 LITERALLY NO ONE CAN BEAT HER SHE WAS SO GOOD ITS UNREAL

ALSO DAVID‼️ I FEEL LIKE PEOPLE DONT FOCUS ON HIM ENOUGH LIKE CMON HE WAS SO GOOD??

RITA MONERO 🥰 She was in the og movie and I am so glad they got her back cuz she was a m a z i n g

Also the fact that she sung her song live?? Cmon man she’s so good

Ok so Josh Rivera 😻 Although I didn’t rlly like Chino at first he definitely grew on me the more I thought about it - Ik killing Tony could be considered extreme, but realistically?? I totally get where he came from, it was an incredibly difficult situation, and I can understand why he did what he did

THE CHOREOGRAPHY ‼️‼️ LITERALLY WHO CHOREOGRAPHED THIS MOVIE IT WAS SO GOOD?? THE WHOLE THING WAS FILLED WITH AMAZING CHOREOGRAPHY AND IT WAS JUST SO 😫 If I could marry that choreography I would

Ok but the singing in general?? Like Ik they wouldn’t cast bad singers but be fr literally all of the songs slap

Ik I’ve said it before but I will say it as many times as I need to THIS IS WHY WE CAST BWAY (OR THEATRE) ACTORS IN MUSICAL MOVIES 👏👏

The soundtrack is actually so good tho like I pretty much wouldn’t skip any of it

Ok completely random but I couldn’t understand half of the movie 💀 cuz they spoke spanish and although I had subtitles on it just gave me the spanish in spanish subtitles, so half of the time I was guessing or just hoping I’ll get what’s going on 😭

If u couldn’t tell I cannot speak spanish (and tbh I’m not doing that well in it at school so 😔)

There is so so so much more I can say about this movie, and once I’ve posted this I will definitely plan a part 2 specifically focusing on the songs, and a part 3 on characters (possibly in the opposite order tho) because this movie was a m a z i n g and I could actually talk about it for h o u r s

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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 11 months

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tuesday again 7/11/23, timezone change edition

the last time i wrote one of these things, i was not quite fully packed up in ma. now, i am technically temporarily homeless in houston, bc the apartment i originally signed on was completely unlivable. crashing in an acquaintance's guest room for a bit while i have a very bad time with apartment hunting round 2

i have lived in south florida, staten island, and various shithole student housing. i understand seasonal bugs in hot places and things such as different kinds of roaches and palmetto bugs. when i say that apartment had the worst roach infestation i've ever seen i fucking mean it. in theory i will get my full deposits back, but they're taking their sweet fucking time about it.

but having that full yes-i-know-about-seasonal-roaches conversation with new acquaintances and leasing agents takes too long so i've resorted to saying it had a horrific bedbug problem, which everyone seems to go Oh Okay Yeah Reasonable For You To Leave much more quickly.

listening

a lot of early aughts dance pop standards, to chase away the agonies as i drive to and from apartments only to get ghosted, find they were rented a week ago, or find that they look absolutely nothing like the pictures. i was really torn on which britney song to pick for this week until my sister sent me Twin Flame by Maude Latour, which i can only describe as "douchebag get the girl back song but for lesbians". spotify

also how do we like the "featured link from bandcamp or soundcloud with additional spotify link" format? in an ideal world i would buy all my music directly from the artists but realistically i use spotify 90% of the time. i don't know what your life is like, tell me if this is helpful or not.

reading

my best friend made sad faces at me until i read The Flatshare by Beth O'Leary, and it was a little nice to see someone else's dire housing situation get resolved neatly and with thematic consistence in several hundred pages. it was also nice to text her snippets with "WHAT?????" every so often. this is a reading experience i don't have very often bc our current reading tastes don't overlap even a little bit.

i don't have much to say about it bc i didn't have particularly strong feelings and don't really read mainstream straight romance, so i can't point out what this did differently or well compared to its peers. if nothing else, it was a fluffy bit of distraction, and i think that's kind of the point?

(image from Tor) also read Saad Z. Hossein's Kundo Wakes Up novella in a waffle house while eating some of the best scrambled eggs i've ever had in my life.

this novella was the closest thing i've ever read to "aging English professor has an affair" without actually containing any of those elements. generally i enjoy his work, but this was sort of a way to check up and tie off many characters from previous works with a sort of light frosting of "my wife left me and i don't know why [ rot13:v pna znxr fbzr thrffrf ohg gurer vf ab zbzrag bs frys-ernyvmngvba, bapr ur svaqf uvf jvsr ur whfg perrcf ba ure sebz nsne naq nsgre qrgrezvavat fur'f abg jvgu nalbar arj znxrf gur gerzraqbhf fnpevsvpvny qrpvfvba gb yrnir ure nybar op fur'f zhpu unccvre jvgubhg uvz. gurer vf ab zbzrag bs frys-ernyvmngvba nobhg jul fur zvtug unir yrsg uvz. xhaqb arire trgf bhg bs uvf bja shpxvat urnq bapr.]"

while The Gurkha and the Lord of Thursday novella (TREMENDOUS) and Cyber Mage book (fun but with some dire pacing issues) are fairly standalone, i cannot imagine you'd get much out of Kundo Wakes Up if you haven't read the other two. for some reason none of the libraries i have access to have his other book Djinn City, so we'll have to procure that elsewhere.

watching

the dnd movie, the day after i broke my lease on the roach apartment. i don't remember a ton about this movie. do generally like a heist. michelle rodriguez was hot

playing

genshin. listen. it is a free and familiar way to turn my brain off by doing open world exploration and puzzles but CRUCIALLY! most of it is completely new to me. i have not played this game in a year and a half. i have not played this game since right before enkanomiya. there was no chasm. there was no Sumeru. i have absolutely no idea what’s happening lore-wise.

i pulled for the fancy ice claymore lady and got a catboy archer (at least i think it is a catboy? the ears do give a pharaoh hound vibe... he is distinct from the extant dogboy archer). not terrible but not my vibe.

youtube

i have been enjoying the shit out of the temporary summer event carnival space. they really did pull out several stops by introducing a ton of genuinely interesting and innovating little new mechanics and mini games. delightful!

making

altering the worst shorts ive ever seeeeeeeeen with a demure little two-inch side slit on both legs bc my thighs simply will not quit. mens shorts are so much better than womens shorts in nearly every way except for the catastrophic physical fit issues.

when i got ghosted by two different apartments on saturday i bought myself a spoon ring so chunky it makes my other chunky rings look positively delicate by comparison. not very comfy to drive in but fine to wear while tippy tappying on the spreadsheets

a girl i saw for one singular awful date in 2016 called my hands "coarse but honest" and i think about that every time my hands are in a photo. what did that even fucking MEAN, [REDACTED]?

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem

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girll-almightty · 10 months

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i haven’t seen the entire show so i haven’t checked what everyone is saying about it in fear of getting spoiled.

but does it feel odd to anyone else? the characters, the relationships, the arcs, the dialogues, the situations… they all feel so much more unnatural than before, and the realisticness that it had in the first two seasons was one of my favorite things about the show.

i mean sure, they had dance-offs or musical numbers out of nowhere. but they also had Gina having a weird idea about fake dating EJ which didn’t make sense but it sort of brought some sense of truth to the character, or nini having to write a song that was never gonna end up in the show anyway, or ricky singing bet on it in his room in front of big red and being super cringey and cute at the same time; and they were worried about who played the lead in the musical, not about mrs. darbus’ monologue in high school musical 4. (call me a bitch but the corbin, monique, lucas, etc. situation feels SO UNNECESSARY)

and i understand shows evolve and can’t stay the same forever, but that doesn’t mean you have to get rid of what gave the show relatability. and that was the characters, and their emotions, their personalities, the fact that they weren’t all just a two-dimensional version of what they started as. and definitely not some gen x/millenial writer trying to give them gen z dialogues to make them relatable instead of real life, common people, high school student problems.

i swear to god they were nailing it through seasons 1 - 2. and then everything got so rushed. (they added great stuff tho! like ashlyn’s sexuality’s exploration, and kourtney’s anxiety and being Elsa on the show?! i’m immensely proud of a lot of things they introduced)

it feels like they are trying to kick seb and big red off the show? and they’re making drama with miss jenn and mike just for the sake of it? i don’t know. it’s weird. i miss when i enjoyed the show and didn’t cringe every ten seconds.

maybe i’m a hater. maybe i should go out and get some sunshine, or maybe i’m right, who knows? that’s all i have to say for now, i’ll be back when i finish the show.

#hsmtmts #gina porter #ricky bowen #ashlyn caswell #carlos rodriguez #kourtney greene #ej caswell #nini salazar roberts #big red #high school musical the musical the series #portwell #rina #rini #hsmtmts s4

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ctommyisnt · 5 months

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I cannot find the original ask game post fam and determine who’s already asked what so let’s just go with 5 or 24

Hi!!! Trust me I could barely find it either (and who knows if this is the one you were talking about) but I’ll answer both because I can’t help it

5. How do you translate the world of Minecraft to fit into your fanfics when you keep the original setting?

THIS is actually one of my favorite things to do; worldbuilding in general is probably one of my favorite hobbies. I once created an au that was about tommyinnit waking up in an alpha world and has to survive. As he explored he slowly helps the world ‘update’ in a sense, either by encouraging or freeing spirits (his friends, this wasn’t fleshed out as much) or just by surviving. It culminated in him going to the end in a later update and talking to Phil (the end) and Kristin (the world) in a very ‘end poem esque’ conversation. The mechanics of Minecraft being thrown into a real life adjacent world is SO INTERESTING!! I have ideas for probably everything. The dragon, enchanting, animal mechanics, everything. The visuals I have of a Minecraft world in my head are magical and I’m really trying to learn how to paint bc I want to put it on paper SO BAD. Trust me I could rant about this forever especially if I had specific questions. I want to write that fic idea (maybe with Tommy, maybe with someone else since that interest has mostly died down) someday if I can, but I think just the idea of being a player, being love, because the world loves you, is such a magical concept that I wish would be explored world. I also have really fun apocalypse theories for Minecraft because wouldn’t that be so cool (THE BONES. THE FUCKING BONES)

Also I highly reccomend reading Minecraft: the island. It was written by the same guy who wrote World War Z and it fantastically explores the idea of a normal person ending up in Minecraft in ways that feel just so realistic. Hilarious read.

24. What work would you like to talk more about

Oooh that’s hard. I only have one ‘real’ wip rn (shoutout @thesentientmango your a real king) bc with real life everything else has taken a back burner, but I have like six main wips from when I was in the dsmp fandom that I hold close to my heart. But also another one based on the song For the Departed by Shayfer James.

It’s about grian who used to be a watcher but ran away to escape that life once he formed connections with people (evo) and has been in hiding in hermitcraft. One day the watchers fine him, but sensing his desperation they offer him a choice. Either he comes with them, back to his family, or he can stay here with these humans, but he must take part in the watchers and their stories that they will do with his friends (which Grian is well aware what the watchers can and will do). He goes with the second, condemning his friends to torture, because he can’t stand to leave them behind and join the watchers. This begins the life series and every winner gets to keep a much clearer memory of the games (the games are like a fever dream during and after). And then scar wins, and finds out what Grian did, and the watchers find out scar knows, and offer him the same choice Grian did. Wonder what scar took huh

Anyways I probably shouldn’t have ranted about that au bc this post is LONG but I can’t help it. The song is revolutionary I highly recommend and let me know what you think of my aus (wow I ranted about two in one post crazy)

#ask game #I have so many aus and worldbuilding ideas you don’t even know #@ducks-and-stuff

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a-thirst-for-dunmer · 1 year

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My favorite things about all my Skyrim followers:

KAIDAN

-wicked ass armor and weapon with fucking tigers on it

-realistic cursing in life or death situations

-literally the most realistic male dialogue ever with his corny ass innuendos. ‘This monument, does it remind you of me, love? Just kidding.’

-so goated in battle. Mans can kill a dragon so easy and i don’t need to do anything but look pretty

-ACCENT.

CARYALIND

-his hair is so fluffy. I bet it smells like roses and vanilla bean, what’s your secret bb

-such a sweetheart all the time. No wonder he can’t be Thalmor, he has too much heart for it

-fucking backstory. It’s very Zuko without villain redemption arc, and the fact that he still worries about the LDB thinking worse of him for being Thalmor royalty is just *chef’s kiss*

-ACE REP. I really fucking love how he can dress like a hoe, flirt like a hoe, and look so hot but have no interest in sex. Mmm that’s my jam that’s what I like.

-boob window

-Kaidan interactions! Proving that Altmer can be kind and sweet and not lighting-shooting British assholes

INIGO

-the backstories for everyone are so damn tearjerking but this guy?? Don’t even get me started on this mans scars I will cry

-literally autism. Says everything on his mind. Sir you are me

-blue. And a cat. What else??

-Lucien and him have a bromance that hits so good

-suplexes Nazeem with only his vibes

-sings original songs, where’s his soundcloud

KHASH

-okay first off i was writing a character just like her for the daughter of my LDB and Revyn. Never knew about her but this is Leeta come to life and i crave it

-pottymouth

-Kaidan Big Bro protection dialogue

-so happy when she kills things

-literally exactly what I expected a baby Argonian to sound like. So cute. So grumpy

-her outfit is just on point. If i hadn’t transitioned i would be cottagecore peasant dress woman with cats

LUCIEN

-like Cary, he is just sweet himbo no brain

-kid in a candy shop vibes. He is amazed by the wonders of this world

-the nerdiest mans you know, would probably never shut up about shit with Auryen but i haven’t gotten that far yet

-bottom energy

-AUTISM once again

-also sings!! Can sing ‘Toss a Coin to Your Witcher’ parody!!

AURI

-she is the Moment

-eats people and only meat. Wanna see someone react to ThatVeganTeacher with her as a vtuber model oml

-bullies Lucien (affectionately)

-cool pod

-looks like she could kill you and could actually kill you

-slams ALL haters and unworthy into the ground with her dialogue. Faendal ily but you don’t deserve her

RUMARIN

-a sweetheart himbo

-very Skilled with magic, specifically bound weapons. As someone who uses conjuration as their main line of magic, because dremora and bound bow go brr, I LOVE THAT

-not really good at speaking poorly of anyone tbh

-like lucien, he’s optimistic and fun to be around

-very…earthy. Jank. Grungy. Not what you’d expect from an Altmer, to be living as an adventurer mercenary, and i like that for him

-eats in bed, brain too empty to clean for long periods of time

-polyamorous pansexual King

-says Z like zed, which makes linguistics in Skyrim lore interesting

NEBARRA

-literally me

-sarcasm to the max

-name means ‘foreigner’ or ‘scorned’ or something transgender. anyway, king nihilist shit

-only wants the good wines

-also, the Accent, very good very sass

-Shakespearean insults for days

-also regular insults

-just…insults

-mystery and striking fear into the hearts of all

TALIESIN

-i thought no one could top Revyn in vibes of what Elder Scrolls character i would kin but then ✨he✨ came along

-no idea why Altmer are Brits but with him, i can vibe with it he sounds so good

-giggles evilly in fights

-s a s s

-pansexual!! We are putting queer in the game! (Even tho all vanilla spouses are, in the most Basic sense, bisexuals)

-the spice he can add with Cary as a protector/snarky best friend. I Need their backstory

-afraid of dogs, cat person

-just an absolute bitch to the Dragonborn but like in a way my gay friends are to me

-eyeliner on fleek

HONORABLE MENTIONS FOR SKEEVER AND CROC

-silly voice go brrr

#tes #skyrim #skyrim custom followers

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deeply-unserious-fellow · 1 month

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No because the thing is, Bucky's behavior in Z-O-M-B-I-E-S 2 would actually be perfectly fine if it WEREN'T FOR HIS PART IN STAND! Like, if he didn't have those few lines showing that he genuinely is reconsidering his values and starting to see the world differently, then you could very easily explain his sudden change in Z2 as him just faking the redemption in Z1 so he could come out on top. But he DID have those lines in Stand. He DID show genuine remorse. And then through the rest of the movie, he went through a surprisingly realistic change: at first he doubled down, not wanting to face the fact that he was wrong. He keeps spiraling and spiraling until finally crashing and burning at the cheer competition. Then, when Zed, Addison and Eliza offer to let him join, he refuses, and that could've been for a lot of reasons, but I think with the context Stand provides, a big part of his refusal is guilt. He feels bad about all the shit he did, and it took that crash for him to snap out of his denial and realize he was well and truly in the wrong. Then he goes off to sulk and shit for most of the song before Zoe approaches him, and I think that interaction with Zoe is what really solidified his desire to change. So he joins in on the big preformance and then everybody is friends now because this is a DCOM.

Also, while Bucky didn't actually do anything to earn forgiveness in Z1, I think it's also important to note that he's like, 17 at most in the first movie? He's still a kid. A kid who was raised in the DEEPLY toxic environment that is Seabrook, was put up on a pedestal for who knows how long, and going off of Addison's parents' behavior, PROBABLY HAS PRETTY BAD FUCKIN PARENTS! That kind of shit doesn't result in healthy people! LOOK AT JOJO SIWA!!!!!!!! Addison literally punched Zed in the face when they met for the first time because of the shit she was taught about zombies, the main reason she flips so fast is because she already got to know Zed before the reveal. Bucky deserves a chance to grow and be better, because everybody deserves a chance to get past their shit up bringing and be better. And HE FUCKING WAS!!!!!!! I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH, HIS LINES IN STAND ARE ENOUGH TO PROVE THE CHANGE HE WENT THROUGH IN ZOMBIES 1 WAS GENUINE!!!!!!!!

There's a reason I get so fucking mad about Bucky's character assassination. It's the same reason everybody hates Chloe's character assassination in Miraculous. Bucky is a kid who comes from, tbh not just a shit family, a whole shitty TOWN, and deserves the chance to escape that cycle. He was making genuine progress by the end of the first movie, and was on the path to maybe recovering from all the fucking problems being a local celebrity in HIGHSCHOOL can cause, but he was completely ruined in the 2nd movie either because Disney Channel can't handle a proper redemption arc in their Original Movies, or because the writers just needed a B plot and didn't know what else to do so they threw together the fucking e l e c t i o n p l o t l i n e. I fucking hate it here.

Anyways yeah stan Zombies Re-Animated for fixing Bucky :)

#can you tell the zombies brainrot is coming back?#sorry Hazbin to all my Hazbin followers for the person I will become when Zombies Re-Animated officially premieres #zombies #disney zombies #z-o-m-b-i-e-s #zombies 2 #z-o-m-b-i-e-s 2 #bucky buchanan #zombies bucky #gal overanalyzes random shit

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falloutnewvegasdeadmoney · 10 months

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In the event of a zombie apocalypse, getting bitten by a zombie and escaping quickly is one of the better ways to go in a world like this, in my opinion. but not as good as surviving. Let me explain my thoughts on how this works in my opinion.

Anyways, in this case the world as we know it is most likely gone. Even in a World War Z situation, the end doesn't even begin for years.

Upon being bitten (and presumably escaping to relative safety) I'd say I get maybe 3-6 hours before I start feeling ill. I use this time to jack it one last time, and then I say my goodbyes to anyone I know who's left before leaving with a friend who is on board with my plans. I'd strike out in a shack or abandoned building about a 5 hour walk from my primary base (this is for testing purposes and whoever I'm with up til now will be on board with assisting me in furthering science).

If I'm lucky I can make it to the secondary location (planned beforehand with my partner beforehand) before I start feeling seriously sick. worst case scenario, we/they manage to get the place in a state of relative safety before I crumple up in a heap. I'd say realistically I personally would start feeling ill an hour before we arrive, but once there I have a bit longer before I get worse. I get set up as comfortably as realistically possible (not very) and proceed to narrate my dying thoughts and everything I feel as infection courses through my body.

The effects will include the kind of nausea that leaves you wishing you were dead, as well as headaches, rashes, extreme fatigue, and joint pain (amongst other less common symptoms). Once I am no longer able to speak coherently, my partner will turn music on for me and leave. I will eventually begin choking on my own vomit before dying rather unceremoniously and alone as my last coherent thought drifts to the song playing. It's nice.

In my mind, a potential zombie virus wouldn't revive corpses. That's fun but leaves little room for playing around. Once I'm basically dead, the virus has fully taken hold of me as it begins focusing more of it's attention on my brain. Anything that was once me is gone. At most, all I would retain are rudimentary and simple motor based habits I would do extensively in my former life (likely nothing beyond my habit of grabbing my shoulder or swaying.)

Once I regain some semblance of what could pass for consciousness, I am about as thoughtless in my mind as a brick. I am guided entirely by instinct. Any attempts to test my memory or intelligence all end in failure, but the act of absently grabbing my shoulder is just enough to leave them wondering if I'm still in here somewhere.

They get too close one day, several weeks into our experiment. Their job is to watch me from afar, to never garner my attention unless necessary for a test. Under no circumstances are they to approach me, and if I even get a bit too close or seem like I could lash out they are to kill me. But I'm grabbing my shoulder, and they find themselves walking away from the upstairs window they had been watching me for weeks from (keeping me lured to the area by playing music if I strayed too far chasing some mindless impulse to simply devour), they head down the stairs and outside and they know it's stupid but they approach me. They know I'm gone but they're not ready to admit this. They get within 20 feet before I notice. I immediately begin trudging towards them. At this point, my body has been reduced to a mass of sores and bruises and rot but I'm just alive enough to follow my impulse and they stop approaching as I get closer.

They don't move away, even as I start biting and tearing at their flesh as they die miserably and painfully and it's awful but we're together in their final moments before I'm doomed to simply continue wandering aimlessly until I drop dead. I don't know who they are. I've already forgotten killing them. I simply wander and eat and grab my shoulder until I die. I sway in place. I can hear music.

#vomit tw #zombie #short fiction #no idea how to tag this #tw death

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rottentiger-art · 10 months

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You know, Lyric Reese could be the temporary Dean of the new and improved PCA…? At least, until a qualified person is found…?

Hahahahah omg, I don't see that happening, realistically, but I wanna indulge on it, bc I just find the idea so fun.

Assuming they let get, I think it would be because she guilted Logan with something like "you don't think I'm serious enough for the job *fake sob* you always underestimate me *more fake sobs*"

Logan told her she can be dean for a week (because for some reason the person they hire couldn't make it in time, idk maybe they're from another state and ran into some troubles with their moving company)

Lyric did a pretty decent job, but as both Logan and Quinn predicted, she got bored of it before the week ended.

still, not wanting to admit she wasn't up for the job and this was just a whim, she pushed through the week, with Logan watching over her quietly, to make sure she doesn't overstress and stuff (protective older brother mode)

lowkey, she wants to make both Logan and Quinn proud, but she won't admit that.

in the classic Reese style, she goes over the top with things.

for starters, this is how I imagine she shows up to school:

kinda like she's trying to imitate Quinn's style, while mixing it with her own bc after Logan she's Quinn's biggest fan

definitely wrote a song to sing in a big circle with the new students, Logan clapped the loudest to make up for the confused applause from the rest lol

Quinn showed her support as well, even when Lyric got them all making musical bonding exercises that shouldn't have lasted that long.

on the first days, she tries to break fights amongst the new students, comically making things worse, but at the end she manages to fix them.

by the rest of the week she realizes she really doesn't need to interfiere on every single problem amongst the students and leave that to the counselors.

(assuming Lyric is 25ish on this AU) working with kids younger than her made her realize she's no longer part of the latest generation. As in, she's having that revelation gen Z is having about whatever name they gave to the new generation. She does not like that at all.

she also realizes kids suck and the only valid child is her new nibbling (if you're not following this AU, i hc that Logan and Quinn had a kid in the middle of the school reopening), in her opinion.

speaking of said nibbling, when Quinn or Logan pop up to check on things (check she hadn't break chaos somehow), they bring along the baby, much to the new aunt's joy.

imagine Logan walking with Lyric through the campus while he pushes a strolled and excitedly tells the baby about his own adventures on that same campus *dies from cuteness*

Lyric: "don't listen to your lame dad, I've been here for less than a week and already have more interesting stories to share"

she spends a lot of time either on "her" office or taking pictures of her on campus, just to prove she has been doing her job.

she throws herself a goodbye party to conclude her week (and by herself I mean Logan organized everything but it was *her* idea so it's almost the same)

Quinn and Logan do tell them they're proud of her, and they honestly mean it. She lasted more than they expected.

if she learned a lesson on that week, is that she's never offering her help again when it comes to that school. She's way to busy to deal with kids that are not her precious nibbling.

well, that's all I got, but as always I invite anyone to add to this if they want.

#ask box #anon #quogan #zoey 102 #zoey 101 #logan reese #quinn pensky #lyric reese #rebuilding PCA au #quogan baby

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elendsessor · 6 days

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For the reverse unpopular opinion meme: Xenoblade!! Yet another interest that we share xP

hell ye!!! i uh. actually have a few and need an excuse to talk about them.

ok i don’t actually know how unpopular this is but—and do not get me wrong on any level future redeemed and all the other expansion additions are great—base 3 is actually better and didn’t really need an expansion.

there’s just something about it i really enjoy (also kinda sad the xc3 tag mostly consists of future redeemed art now instead of 3), with all the flaws only on a gameplay front that it shares with 1 and 2. maybe it’s because it came in at a time in my life where i needed it most. been a xenoblade enjoyer since chuggaaconroy’s lp was going on (that was my introduction to the series!) aka for an eternity at this point so it already had a great place in my heart, but the release timing was crucial. covid was hard. i was just beginning to build some semblance of a social life before everything went into lockdown, i was realizing how much longer i had until i graduated from high school, and was really existential. a lot of games handle the concept of death and the passage of time well yet 3 actually impacted me which isn’t something i can fully say about others. it also made me cry.

like idk 3 was perfect. the expansions added onto a perfect package and wrapped things up nicely but i don’t think it needed that and everything that was loose ended were also pretty much up to interpretation before then so.

z was actually a great villain. all xenoblade games so far have had great villains (i haven’t played x so idk how it applies but i’m sure it did well) but i’m a sucker for the big bad being a personified concept. zanza’s still my fave probably because of the buildup but z? he hits different.

also on a non 3 note i actually prefer the look and ost of the first game over definitive. maybe it’s the nostalgia talking but gritty low poly graphics are peak, the not-quite-anime-but-not-realistic style of the portraits and models are peak, and dammit the ost is godly. monolith soft knew there was no topping the og that’s why they made definitive’s ost weaker with only one remastered song being slightly better-

#shantien answers #gonna be shot for the last one #xenoblade #definitive’s ost didn’t hit for me sorry. it’s good just. not as good. just sounds off in my opinion

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darlingletshurttonight · 1 year

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i like srk as the celebrity he is. he's definitely an emotion for the millenial and gen z generations. he's so suave, so charming, the show of humility, yes, wonderful. but truthfully, it was fucking painful to sit through pathaan.

i absolutely hated the movie and the characters. dimple kapadia was the only saving grace in the movie and they offed her. i wish they'd given deepika padukone's character more substance instead of just making her show her thighs every 15 mins and being the plot explainer for kids.

what's with the childish dialogues man. the dialogue delivery of every actor fell fucking flat. it felt like a school skit. she has like 3 expressions in the whole movie.

i can still excuse the fact that they're driving on the same patch of road again and again in the dubai sequence, but why are they flying their helicopters in between the gaps of buildings. and nobody does anything about it? they crash their cars in one of the busy squares and chit chat about the recent happenings in their lives for a good 5 mins and not a single soul is around in broad fucking daylight. only after their conversation is over will they realize that the other guys leg is stuck somewhere and their petrol is leaking. the fuck were the rest of them in the car doing all this while?

(honestly this meme applies to the whole movie, like every scene)

which raw agent would beat up fellow raw agents to run away with an isi agent to solve a case they were GONNA HAVE TO SOLVE WITH RAW ANYWAY.

if they were gonna name the virus raktbeej why not actually give it some mythological connotation. also what is with pathaan referring to himself in third person all the time. stop. i see ppl thirsting over the main actors and like, i get the aesthetic but cmon it doesn't helpppppp. i couldnt even appreciate her machine gun sequence in the end because it felt like a replica of vikram and just seemed so forced. like a desperate attempt at convincing themselves and the audience that yes, she's not here just for plot advancement. her backstory added nothing to her character.

such an excruciating movie. it was like a collage of multiple movies mashed together the night before the submission. i can't believe im saying this, but war seemed more realistic. ATLEAST it had good music. i dont get the hype behind besharam rang and jhoome jo pathaan either. what am i missing here. especially jhoome jo pathaan. like besharam ramg still had a sliver of tune to vibe to, i died laughing at the cat puking dance step she does in the beginning of the song. what the fuck is jhoome jo pathaan.

imagine a raw agent being told by his boss to get to work, and he replies with "i got a date with my isi agent girlfriend. see ya later" what is this, a start up? the characters of shahrukh khan and deepike padukone felt like a big insult to actual agents.

#pathaan #shahrukh khan #deepika padukone #just my opinion #it completely sucked #makes me sad to think about all the money spent into making this crap #could've been used for so many better things #like not making the fucking movie #ugh #bollywood

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steampunkforever · 1 year

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World War Z was one of those films I never expected to be as good as it was. A solid Zombie film when it really didn’t need to be. I respect that. The books it was based off of (Zombie survival handbook and the titular World War Z) were hard to faithfully adapt, as the survival handbook was just that and did most of its worldbuilding through footnotes and brief digressions in the text, while World War Z was an anthology set up as an oral history with no real through line to connect the different perspectives of the apocalypse. For this reason I forgive the liberties the film takes to tell the story.

As a movie that came out in 2013 (great year for A-10 Thunderbolts in film), its an interesting prediction of how we’d handle a pandemic. Among a few things it got right were the Israeli and North Korean responses to a global pandemic, as well as the quick spread and general meltdown of North America as the government overstepped its legal bounds to try and stop the spread.

Another thing the movie got right was the fact that vaccine technology and scientific capability would find a cure to the disease basically within a year of it becoming a major threat. Obviously it’s a film about zombies and not a respiratory ailment but the fact is that once you understand the weakness of the disease, human technology has reached the point where mitigation is rapidly deployable.

The film itself was pretty decent. It fell into the post-Taken/Bourne trap of shaky action cams and bleak realistic lightning, but held enough interesting visuals that I wasn’t overall bored by the cinematography. The score was overall unremarkable, save for some Muse tracks (including a Muse Dubstep end credits song?) and the performances were solid but nobody stuck out other than Brad Pitt’s beard (one of his better looks in my opinion).

I predict that in the wave of Zombie films that preceded the dead-eyed wave of superhero movies that currently dominate theaters and streaming platforms, World War Z will end up sticking out as one of the classics. For a minute there apocalypse movies were everywhere but in terms of quality this one stuck out (alongside Mad Max and the Book of Eli, though definitely not as ambitious) as one of the better ones, with enough ambition to provide engaging set pieces and a handful of Muse songs to set it apart.

Speaking of ambitious moves, I couldn’t believe this until I saw it: promptly after discovering the cure to Zombies, Brad Pitt stops on his way to deliver it and cracks open a cold, refreshing Pepsi. Unmatched tonal shift. I suggest you watch the movie just for this sequence.

#filmposting #world war z #brad pitt

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cornbeefcycles · 2 years

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Deltavember Day 22 - Jevil

was soooo excited for deltavember and then school beat my fucking corpse into the ground. anyways. wanted to do jevil at least because there is something about his fight that drives me fucking crazy and i wanted to write about that so i recorded one to use as reference because lets make it realistic with getting hit and all, right?

i somehow did a fucking no hit. with a 12 turn. which is the fastest, most optimal method of defeating him and requires really really good grazing. by complete accident. what the fuck.

----- Click. Up. Z. Hold control and x. Mash z and enter. Down, z, z. Hold right.

It’s muscle memory at this point. Ingrained by so many hours of practice.

Keep holding down control and x. Mash z and enter. The music starts up. It’s not the usual one- you’ve replaced it with another song.

Left, left, left. Defend, defend, defend. Mash through his textbox.

Jevil fires little spades at you with a laugh- you move closer to them, trying to graze from two bullets at once. He moves to the other side, firing again. You do the same thing again. Repeat it until the turn ends

.Right, z, z, down, z. Susie spins something around- tires him out more.Spades form around you, and oh, it’s this attack- you remember trying to get the dodge right, get enough Tension to do a Hypnosis. So many attempts late into the night, so many times you’ve come up a few points short of the spell.

You’ve long since improved, of course. Almost child’s play now. Stay still (it’s easier when you’re near the middle, or better yet, in it), then circle ‘round- graze on the inside of the ring, not on the outside.

ACT, Jevil, Hypnosis. Right, z, z, down, z. Susie spins it again.

Ah. Your favorite attack. Bombs drop just out of reach, a formation of heart-shaped bullets springing out of each one. Focus.Focus. Down-left, then right. Weave in and out of the gaps. Stay as close to as many bullets as you can- it’s all about gathering TP.47 TP. Not quite enough for Hypnosis. It never is, this turn. Right, z, left, z, left, left. Pirouette. Kris spins around then points at Jevil- tranquil! Their dance defended the party!

“METAMORPHOSIS!” Jevil cries out. He warps, stretching out until the Devilsknife stands in his stead. He splits into four and sends himself at you. You dodge easily- without the big red one, this attack is child’s play. Graze. You’ll need it.

78 TP. Right, z, z, down, z. Kris sends him a strange gaze. Jevil laughs and summons the carousel.

You move to the upper right corner of the box- it’s a safe spot for about the first half of the attack. Then down-left, following the gap in between the rows of horses. You slip in between two of them to get to the next gap, where you wait until the turn is over.

The carousel doesn’t give you enough for a Hypnosis this time. Right, z, left, z, left, left. Kris spins again, trying to tire out Jevil… it felt comforting! It heals Ralsei a little bit- he doesn’t need it, though. He’s still at full health.

Another bombs attack. Clubs, this time. Probably the easiest one to graze- move to the top, and then move up and down in little increments. You try to move closer to the bullets again, to graze a bit more TP.

88. Right, z, z, down, z. Ralsei takes action this time, chanting nonsense in a way that sounded intimidating. It works, somehow.

You haven’t gotten hit yet, you realize with a start. Holy shit. Jevil laughs like he just read your mind.

“I CAN DO ANYTHING!” Diamond bullets form below the box. You wince- this attack ruined a lot of no-hit attempts before. Better to be safe than sorry for this one, you decide, moving away from the initial cluster of bullets.

Somehow, you still manage to graze to 80 TP. Better put that all into a Hypnosis, then.

Jevil sends another ring of spades at you- this time, it spins in both directions. Clockwise, counter-clockwise, then clockwise again. Still the same technique as earlier, though. Still child’s play.

56 TP- enough for Hypnosis. Right, z, z, down- wait, no! The next attack is the second carousel, the one where every other column of horses move up and down. Doing Hypnosis here means you have to graze really well to get to Pirouette levels during that attack, and while you’re confident you can pull it off, you don’t want to risk your no-hit.

Up, right, left, left. Kris spins again. A perfect 10! The entire party is healed, though they’re already at max HP.

Damn, no Everyman this time. Maybe it’s for the best, though. You always get hit whenever they show up in this attack.

You pick Hypnosis this turn to make up for the Pirouette you took. Right, z, z, down, z.

The next attack is also where a lot of your previous no-hit attempts died- it’s hard to graze without getting hit. Still, you manage to pull through, grazing enough to bring your TP to 63.

Perfect.

One last Hypnosis- Kris again, you barely register. You hope the pattern isn’t too hard this time. There’s a couple of runs you lost at this last attack.

Hold your breath. Bottom left, upper left, bottom right. Slip in between the gaps before they spread out too much.

The turn ends.

“Holy shit,” You breathe out- Pirouette, Defend, Pacify!

Another one to add to the counter, it seems. --- ... this is how the fight went, if you’re curious.

#deltarune #deltavember #i feel kinda bad not being able to complete the challenge but since its my first one eh i guess it was kinda bound to happen #anyways jevil fight is so fucking fun when you get the hang of it #is it hard as balls when you don't know how to do it? yeah #am i absolute shit at it whenever i dont play with my desktop keyboard? yes #but i always get into the zone whenever i do it and dodging and menuing and grazing is just so exciting and fun im obsessed with it god

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alyssafedrau · 8 months

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For this portion I drew an otter since it is my favorite animal. A fun fact about them is that after each meal they wash themselves. I have always been drawn to otters ever since I first saw them at the zoo as a little kid. They are unique animals.

I cannot really say that my music taste changes much in the fall, I think that I listen to the same music all year round. I am not much of a scary movie person, but growing up I loved the movie Halloweentown!

I was born in 2003, with research I saw that Beyoncé had won 5 Billboard Music Awards. Her debut album was also released this year, along with “Crazy in Love” featuring Jay-Z, which was in the overall top 5 songs of that year. I picked this since it is interesting that everyone my age today sings this song by her.

I chose the lyrics “They say that good things take time. But really great things happen in the blink of an eye” from the song One in a Million by Hannah Montana. This was one of my favorite songs as a kid, and I would sing it without much meaning. But looking at the lyrics years later it makes so much more sense. These lyrics mean to me that you should not wait around for good things, because when you least expect it, these good things will come to you!

Attendance Portion

“Artists used gold not for realistic effect, but because of its intrinsic value, and even once Renaissance artists began placing their figures in more natural settings and mastering perspective, they still liked to make use of rich gold paint” (Pg 88).

I chose this quote because of the meaning behind gold. This made me think about how people gravitate towards things and ideas that benefit them in a monetary sense. They like things that are richer, and that is how you fit into today's society. This quote talks about how the idea of gold brings this monetary value. Even though people may not actually enjoy it, they enjoy the idea of being “richer” by using gold, which is why I found this quote so interesting!

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sophierequests · 2 years

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🌟 Bubble Gum by Clairo with Zoya Nazyalensky and F reader if that's alright? Maybe it could be angst with happy ending. Also congrats on 100 :D

it's obvious i wanted to

Navigation┃Main Masterlist┃Request

Pairing: Zoya Nazyalenksy x f!Reader

A/N: You can serve me any Clairo/sad sapphic song, and I'll eat it right up, so thank you sm for this request kdkgksg. I had too many scenarios in mind, so I did struggle a bit, but I hope that I was able to produce something coherent.

Summary: Zoya can't admit that she likes the reader, and it starts getting difficult.

Genre: Angst to Fluff

Word Count: 2.9K

Warnings: None really, mention of an alcoholic beverage maybe?

She had been avoiding you for nearly two weeks and everyone seemed to have noticed. It admittedly wasn't hard not to notice. But still, nobody else could make sense of Zoya's sudden isolation. If it had been anyone but you, most people wouldn't have questioned it, but you had always been closer than most.

So what happened?

There was no point in denying that Zoya had developed feelings for you. No matter how hard she tried to push them away, to treat you just as a friend, she couldn’t deny that she liked you. Nikolai had already tried to convince her to confess at least a thousand times, but she knew that she wasn’t able to.

Love had never been a priority in her life. Not even her family had cared about whether she loved the man or not before they basically tried to sell her off like cheap cattle. After the many men that had taken advantage of her since then, she decided to never fall for anyone again, only focussing on the thing that made her who she was - her Small Science.

But things had changed.

From the moment she met you, she knew that you weren’t like that. You were sweet and kind. So sweet, that whenever you were close to her, she couldn’t even form a coherent sentence. Her throat felt like it had been sewn shut, whilst she desperately tried to hide the blush on her cheeks.

It was embarrassing - humiliating even. She was a General for Saints’ sake, and she couldn’t properly talk to a girl that she had a crush on? What was happening to her? She didn’t even believe that she’d have a realistic chance with you, so why was she so afraid?

Nikolai and Genya had also noticed her odd change in behaviour whenever she was around you, and of course, they decided to convince her to ask you out.

“Zoya, come on. Everybody knows that you like her, why don’t you just tell her? I’m pretty sure that she already knows it too.” Nikolai groaned after she had been too focussed on staring after you instead of listening to him.

Her head whipped around as her face contorted into a frown. His pesky comments didn’t ease the forming knot in her stomach.

“It shouldn't matter to you whether I tell her or not. Keep your nose out of my business before I make it even more crooked than it already is.” she threatened, avoiding his sharp glance by shuffling through a stack of documents.

“Z,” Genya’s oddly calming voice sounded next to her, “we are your friends, it does matter to us. It would do you some good to have someone you genuinely care about.”

For some reason, this irritated Zoya. Caring for someone, and loving them was something she had to learn the hard way. But she had also learned that she could lose them just as quickly, especially when she held onto them too tightly.

“So that I can mourn her when she inevitably dies because of me?” she snapped, shooting both an icy glare, “I’m not risking it. Just drop it.”

They did, in fact, stop talking about it for a bit, but still, everyone knew that Zoya herself would not be able to put some space between you.

Everything just seemed to get even worse once she genuinely had the chance to tell you how she really felt.

Their group - consisting of Nikolai, Zoya, Tolya, Tamar and you - had decided to stay in a quite questionable boardinghouse close to the harbour of Novyi Zem. The terrible weather circumstances delayed your departure for at least another day, so you all felt more comfortable just renting a handful of rooms. It wasn’t ideal, but it was the best you could do.

Much to Zoya’s dismay, they had to share the rooms, leading to her and you being assigned the same one. She was sure that Nikolai was responsible for this particular room arrangement, but she didn’t have the energy to fight him about something like this.

Begrudgingly, she put her bags down next to yours, whilst you already began to sort your things. Carefully arranging everything that you would need for the following days. Her eyes constantly travelled to the single bed that stood in the middle of the room, about which you didn’t even seem to care.

“I hope you don’t mind having to share a bed with me. I promise I don’t snore. At least not as loud as Tolya.” you chuckled, looking up at her with a wide smile.

She felt her heartbeat accelerate as she futilely tried to force back her own smile. Again, her throat felt almost swollen when she opened her mouth to answer you.

“Oh, I, uhm, I don’t really mind. The situation isn’t ideal, but I could’ve imagined having to share the room with someone worse.” she stammered, cheeks flushing red.

“Good to know.” you grinned, zipping up your bag and standing up, “Are you hungry? I’d suggest we head out and grab something to eat. I’m starving.”

“We have to be careful, though, we’re not locals an-”

“Saints, Z, I didn’t think that you’d turn out to be so afraid of a simple evening stroll.” you joked, already putting on your coat.

Zoya sighed, feeling uncomfortable by the prospect of going outside alone, but she tried to shake off her worries. The growling of her own stomach was getting too loud to ignore. Without thinking about it too much, she also went for her coat, following you downstairs and into the almost empty streets of the city. Most people were already at home or still inside the buzzing pubs, so it wasn’t odd to see the occasional group of townspeople stroll out of the adjacent buildings, ready to go back home.

Eventually, you settled for one of the dingier-looking pubs, since it was one of the few food places that were still open. It was surprisingly crowded, so you had to choose one of the corner tables, that only allowed you to sit right next to each other.

Great.

The next hour was hell. Your shoulders were touching. Constantly. Occasionally, she could feel your breathing fanning across her neck, whenever you would turn your head to talk directly to her. Her situation wasn't improved when she accidentally mistook your glass for her own, flinching at the unexpected bitter taste of beer running down her throat.

"Oh! Zoya, that was my drink!" you laughed wholeheartedly as you noticed the sour expression on her face.

"I noticed." she coughed, shoving the glass over to you.

The coughing almost intensified, when she watched you bring the drink up to your own mouth. Your lips were in the exact same spot as Zoya's had been only mere seconds earlier. That certainly didn't ease the utterly dreadful feeling that had formed in her stomach.

Even though you had already finished and paid for your food, you still decided to stay a bit longer before stalking back upstairs. The closeness was still rather uncomfortable for Zoya, but the tumultuous pub kept her distracted, so she agreed to wind down here a bit longer.

"So," you began, a smirk on your lips as you angled your body towards her, "You and Nikolai, are you a…thing now?"

Zoya almost choked on her own spit as she let your words go through her head. She and Nikolai were strictly friends - colleagues even - nothing more. At this point, she wasn't sure whether she was glad that she had been able to hide her obvious crush this well, or if she should cry about the fact that she was now being questioned about her dating life by said damned crush.

"Me and Nikolai? What makes you think that? We're not a couple. I would've already strangled him if that would be the case."

"Oh, just a thought. You seem to be so comfortable around each other." you commented, giving her an expression on your face, that she could not quite read.

“I can assure you that there is nothing going on between me and Nikolai. Absolutely nothing.” she assured you again, not wanting to provoke any rumours.

You only laughed at her panicked insistence, taking one last sip from your glass before taking a deep breath.

“So, is there anyone you might find…interesting?” you asked, looking right into her eyes.

“What? I don’t, uhm, have my eyes on anyone in particular, no.” she stuttered, not being able to pry her eyes away from you.

Her mouth was oddly dry, causing her voice to sound rougher than expected. She couldn’t tell you that it was you that she liked. What if you didn’t like her back? What if you would never be able to look into her eyes again? It was too much of a risk. But something inside her told her to at least keep the conversation going.

“What about you?” she asked, immediately regretting it after she saw the blush that rushed to your cheeks.

Of course, you liked someone. How could you not?

“It’s…difficult, but I do like someone. But I highly doubt they like me back. They are not the feelings type of person, but I don’t blame them.” you chuckled bitterly, bouncing your leg slightly underneath the table.

Against her better judgement, she wanted to reassure you. Maybe if you found someone else - someone better - she could be able to get rid of the feelings she had for you.

“Maybe they never showed any feelings towards you, because they feel the same, but just don’t want to get hurt?” she said, the statement hitting a bit too close to home.

You threw your head back, continuing to look at her, a glint of hope in your eyes.

“Is that how you feel, Zoya?” you asked, your voice barely a whisper.

“What?” Zoya breathed out.

She understood what you implied, but she didn’t believe it. Why would you like her?

“I like you. A lot.” you mumbled, growing quieter as you saw the shocked expression on her face.

At this point, she was glad that you weren’t a Heartrender, because if that would be the case, you would’ve definitely heard the way her heart thumped inside her chest. You were still so close. The perfect distance to lean forward and kiss you.

Instead, she just shook her head, standing up abruptly while she apologized hectically.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I- I can’t- I don’t. I’m sorry.” she muttered before shaking her head and standing up.

"Zoya, wait!" you tried to call after her, but she had already rushed towards the door.

No matter how fast you would've jumped up and ran after her, you wouldn't have been able to catch up to her. And you doubted that she would've appreciated it, so you continued sitting there like a kicked puppy until the impulse to walk back towards the boarding house hit you. She wouldn't be in your room, but there was nothing you could do to help. Maybe leaving her with her thoughts could be useful.

No one had an idea where Zoya stayed that night, and no one dared to ask. From then on, she avoided even looking at you. It was an awful feeling and both of you knew that you wouldn't be able to keep it up forever. However, the trip home was spent in complete silence between the two of you.

And now you haven't had a proper conversation, or even proper eye contact, for almost two weeks. It was gnawing at you, and you felt the urge to go up to her and apologize, however, you didn't want to risk her blowing up on you and ruining all of your chances at reconciliation. So you didn't, no matter how many times Nikolai or Genya tried to get you to. It felt childish and immature, but you didn't do it out of spite, rather out of self-preservation.

Zoya didn't enjoy the tense situation either. She wanted to talk to you, to tell you about her day, and even to tell you that your feelings weren't unrequited, but whenever she tried to speak to you, all of the words she could've said stayed stuck in her throat.

One evening, however, she tried to swallow it.

You were curled up in one of the armchairs that stood in the seating area around the fireplace in the common room, probably reading some new novel or poetry collection Tolya had lent you. You looked good - peaceful and undisturbed. She recognized the shirt you wore since it used to be the one she complimented the most - a deep blue button-up blouse that fits you perfectly. Your calmness made her contemplate going back to her chambers, suddenly not feeling too brave about talking to you. But she couldn't turn back now, or else you might never talk to her again. And she had been through worse, so this really shouldn’t be as big of a deal as she made it out to be.

She made sure to shut the door behind her as loudly as it was deemed acceptable, making your gaze shift towards her in an instant. When you gave her a quick smile instead of greeting her in your usual cheery tone, she knew she had to make the first move. Zoya sighed, sitting down as close to you as she could, without it being too obnoxious for you, or overwhelming for her.

"Y/N." she started, breaking the silence and actually addressing you for the first time in what felt like a lifetime.

It almost felt strange hearing your name leave her mouth, so you had to consider your imagination playing a trick on you. Looking up at her pleading face was more than enough to convince you otherwise. You shut your book gently, placing it down on the side table next to you and focussing completely on her.

“Zoya.” you repeated her name back to her, patiently waiting for her to start talking.

When she didn’t continue talking, you gave her a knowing smile. Gone was the brave and stoic Zoya, now she had been replaced by the insecure little girl she secretly was, whenever she was genuinely scared.

“Zoya,” you said again, “if you’re worried that I’m mad at you for what went down in Novyi Zem, I’m not. I understand, and I also understand that it made you feel uncomfortable. I’m sorry. But can we please put it past us and start talking again?”

Your voice brought her back to reality. This was exactly not what she wanted.

“No.” she started over again, slower this time, “I mean, yes, I want us to talk again, but I- you didn’t make me feel uncomfortable. At least not like that.”

“How did you feel then?” you asked cautiously, not wanting to undo all the courage it must’ve taken her to even consider talking to you, “You can be honest with me, you know that. I won’t blame you for your feelings.”

“I didn’t expect you to say that you liked me back. You were so close and everything was too much. I was…overwhelmed, and I didn’t know what to do, so I just ran. I’m sorry.” she admitted, her eyes roaming the room as if she had never seen it before.

“Back?” you inquired, your heart had only latched onto one syllable.

“What?”

“You said that you didn’t expect me to like you back. What are you insinuating?”

“I’m saying that I like you too.” she answered quickly, not wanting to repeat herself again, and also strictly avoiding your lingering gaze.

“So what you said, about being scared of me hurting you, that was how you truly felt?” you asked further.

“Yes.”

Much to her surprise, you didn’t laugh at her for having such immature worries. She of all people should know better than that. But you didn’t. Instead, you stood up from your seat, moving over to the sofa she was sitting on. Again, you were right next to her, one of your hands on her shoulder as you resumed talking, softer this time.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner? We could’ve skipped the last two weeks of silence.” you said calmly, your gaze drilling holes into the side of her head.

“I don’t know. I just feel like I can’t talk properly whenever I’m around you, and I can’t pinpoint why. I’m sorry.”

“Oh Zoya, don’t apologize.” you tried to reassure her, rubbing slow circles over her back, “I think we’re going to be alright.”

Zoya felt your warmth again. The damned warmth that made her run away the last time. This time, she decided on the opposite.

Without overthinking it, she leant toward you, her hands cupping your face as she pulled you closer. Your arms wrapped around her fully, as you felt yourself getting pulled into a kiss. Her lips were slightly chapped, but you didn’t mind, the welcome feeling of her body flush to yours made your head spin. Her eyes were still closed when you pulled away, her forehead dropping to rest against your shoulder.

“I would’ve kissed you then if I had-” she started, but you just shushed her.

“I know.”

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