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morathicain · 1 year

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Ter had never believed he’d be the one to bear the news to Mae. It should have been him who’d died, a fleeting remark Phon would have for Mae during one of his visits. Nothing remarkable, nothing world changing. It had been bound to happen. Instead, it was now him, who sat in front of her, watching her world fall apart as he uttered the words, as the reality of Phon’s death sunk into his own mind again and again. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go and he felt as if he’d sunk into ice cold water, drowning all while he watched his own life go on, like a mistake. There was nothing to say to make this right, to make this better and still he lied, unable to carry the blame in front of her, unable to watch her dispise him, hate him. He had, after all, sworn to protect her if Phon couldn’t, anymore. What a fool Phon had been, to lay such a task onto his shoulders. What a fool Phon had been, to trust Ter with his life. What a fool ...

Mae should have known it, should have expected it and she had, in some corner of her heart, feared it, each day of her life. And still it felt as if she’d grown too sure in her skin, in their life, trusting Phon’s words to be safe and to have this and that he got this, too much. As Ter told her, she felt distant, empty, exhausted. She should have known but all that was left was the black hole sucking in her life, her happiness. They could have had it all, she told herself but knew it was a lie. This had always been bound to happen and the memory of Phon’s smile was like a slap to her face. ‘I won’t let you vanish’, she promised him, her love, her life, reaching deep into the void of her heart. There was nothing left except a spark of rage, of hate upon the world for tearing them apart.

There was a whole new universe out there for Phon, almost in reach, and he yearned for it. It was a simple universe, an honest one, a happy one and he could see it every time he looked at Mae, looked into her eyes. It was the universe which was inside of her, the life filling her to the brim, the love he couldn’t contain whenever they were close. Instinctively, he reached out to her, to take her hand, to feel the warmth of her skin, her heart. He’d loved her as long as he could remember and his only goal in life was to love her even more. He’d started this job because he was good at it, because it had been easy to slip into it, because it had given him the chance to earn enough money to support her. “I’d give my life for you”, he whispered, kissing the back of her hand before pulling her into his arms. “Live your life for me”, she demanded with a rough voice, the universe in her eyes drowning him as he kissed her lips with a burning soul.

@ommited-miscellaneously @teresis

#3 will be free #3wbf #3wbf rewatch #3wbf drabbles #LISTEN #I LOVE them #I wanna drown in their pain and angst and possibilities #Ter/Mae/Phon #tagging you two #hope that's okay #who else wants to be tagged in those drabbles #pls tell me

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morathicain · 11 months

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How to love in multitudes

(or read on AO3)

Oh, Miw realised, staring at the two wasted men in front of her.

Both.

She wanted both.

~~~

The night with Neo wasn’t anything special she’d told herself. Just them having fun and chasing some of this loneliness and helplessness away which they’d shared. They had bonded and Neo was an attractive guy after all. Nothing wrong about some casual sex here, let out some steam and feel safe for a little while, wanted even. The fact that she’d just flirted with Leo didn’t matter at all but she had to admit that having a one night stand with Neo was probably the smarter move. Less guilt when she’d leave because she knew Neo was the same as her and wouldn’t cling. With Leo, there might be a heart left broken.

So why, if it had been nothing special at all, did she feel so troubled as she watched Neo search for Shin in a panic, as she watched him run towards Shin, keeping her from following and then hugging the man so desperately? Shin’s stony, angry face had made her feel guilty, had twisted her heartstrings in a new, weird way, but that had vanished when Neo suddenly clung to him as if his life depended on it. As if he’d almost lost the most precious piece of his heart.

Was he in love with Shin?

Or was it guilt for dragging him into the mess?

But why then, would he look as if he’d been about to go crazy? Why had he chased through the woods, frantically searching for Shin? For someone who’d be the only one safe if caught?

And why, then, did Miw herself heave a sigh of relief, despite her twisted chest?

Was she, by all means, jealous?

The thought seemed so absurd she would have laughed if she didn’t feel her throat tightening at the sight in front of her and all those conflicting feelings rushing through her veins. It was ridiculous, really. She wasn’t in love with either of them and their kisses and sex hadn’t meant anything either. They had simply bonded a little, already enough to annoy her but not enough to make her stay and be in love. And she knew how it was to be in love and this wasn’t it. This couldn’t be it.

Still, she kept quiet and drew herself back for a while, watching Neo and Shin, a little closer now, Neo’s hands always hovering but rarely daring.

It shouldn’t matter she kept telling herself but her hackles were still raised.

It shouldn’t matter but she still felt as if her skin was too tight, too wrong.

~~~

The feeling didn’t get better the closer they got to her old home, but the way every word, every move of the two men beside herself made her simultaneously draw closer and draw back, wasn’t something she’d expected or could explain.

It was all because of Boss John, she told herself and she for sure was right. It was all because there could be someone finding her each moment, killing her at sight, but ...

There was more to it and she knew but didn’t know and it drove her crazy.

~~~

If Miw could she would like to crawl under Shin’s skin.

The urge to push and push and push, to get a reaction, an impact was overwhelming, heightened even by her own nervousness to be back home again. This itch though wasn’t only an angry one. Sometimes it was, when Shin seemed so vulnerable once again, his yearning jealousy too open, his heart ready to be slashed.

But that wasn’t all. It wasn’t even jealousy, it was ... it was ...

“I’m just playing with you”, she laughed, her mind still fuzzy from the brownies and and she watched his jaw tighten, the rage in his eyes aflame.

It was good, she thought with a giggle, to have his attention like that but it was also bad. She wanted to make it worse and better, she wanted Shin to like her and fight her, she wanted ...

She smeared the brownie into his face.

“What the fuck, Miw?”

“I am just playing with you”, she repeated but he didn’t understand, he didn’t get it and her words failed her while she got drunk on the fire in his gaze.

Neo arrived and the attention was turned again, the betrayal now a bitter one and Miw felt him slipping again, believing for a second that he’d turn the next moment towards the sea and swim out of her grasp, out of their world.

“Here, let me clean you”, she offered and took off her shirt and relished in the fact that he let her step close, that he let her wipe the brownie off.

“Are you jealous?”, she dug deeper, drunk on every reaction she got, no longer able to understand herself but letting the waves of want drag her along as she slid further into his focus, into his bubble, engulfing him with her own heat.

She was under his skin, Miw realised, giddy because of the proximity and because he still hadn’t pushed her away, let her cut and care her way into his heart. She wanted to stay, she realised as she watched Neo cling to Shin from behind, again some space between them, the same desperation she’d just felt in his words. Miw wanted to stay right there, under Shin’s ribs, a cozy place to call her own.

She wanted Shin, Miw realised and her frantic, feral heart became calm.

Oh ...

“We both care about you”, Neo had said and he was right.

She hadn’t known how, her confused heart in a mess, trying to separate the ways she felt, make sense of them. But she didn’t have to, right? She wanted Neo and she wanted Shin, the urge to claw and have and keep like a storm in her veins. And that was all the truth she needed right now, didn’t she?

The realisation made her eager suddenly, brimming with hot energy. And she stepped so close, her arms around Shin’s neck, his attention, now softer, back on her.

“Don’t you remember our night?”, she asked and the recognition in his eyes fueled a very specific thirst in her chest.

“You are a good kisser”, she reassured him because it was the truth.

Neo’s hold on Shin tightened and she didn’t even have to look into his face to know that he agreed, that he was anticipating whatever would happen now, unknown as it was.

“I think something besides killing a man binds us three together.”

The statement was everything and nothing. The truth coming out of her well but too simple to encompass everything they’d survived. Miw couldn’t say more and she didn’t have to. Not yet, not with them ...

And Shin was defenceless, expecting the unexpected, welcoming her lips with an open mouth, a hitched breath. Miw felt more high than from the brownie with his hands on her hips, his shudder vibrating through her as Neo leaned in even closer. And with satisfaction she watched as the two of them kissed, secure in her knowledge that they were part of her, that she was part of them.

She’d found this spot in Shin’s heart, right beneath his ribcage and as long as she was allowed to, she’d make herself comfortable, make herself a home there.

And somehow, for now, for tonight, Neo was right beside her and despite the excitement as they now touched and explored, Miw finally felt content. At least for a little while ...

The End

#3 will be free #3wbf rewatch #3wbf drabbles #even if it's no longer a drabble #but I'm STILL working on all those ideas I had when I rewatched

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morathicain · 1 year

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Scrambling hands found soft skin, fingers which held on to hers the second they met.

Despite her thundering heart, Mae could hear the change in Ter's breathing, could hear him turn around.

"P'Mae?" Even half asleep he used the honorific and Mae almost chocked at it, the devastating feeling of her dream still having her in a tight grip.

A tiny sob escaped her and the next instant there were arms around her, pulling her close, shielding her against the world.

"You were gone", she whispered, "I woke up and you were gone."

She could feel him swallow and his grip on her became almost painful, a reminder that this was real, not another dream, not her fantasy. She needed it and she knew Ter needed it too.

"I'm here", his voice was rough next to her ear, still filled with sleep, "I am with you."

Although she wanted to stay pressed against him, Mae leaned back until she was able to look at him, see the shadows dancing across his face. And although she could barely make out his features, she reached out to cup his face with her hands, his skin warm under her touch. Warm and alive.

"Don't leave me", she wanted to say but couldn't, still too afraid, too caught up in the fear of her dream.

"Kiss me", she said instead and Ter did so without a blink of hesitation. The pressure of his lips against hers grounded her, his hands buried in the back of her loose shirt and holding on to her neck, excited her.

Breathing hard, they separated, their lips unleashing a smacking sound. There was no more sleep to be found on their bed, Ter's storming heart proof enough against her breasts.

"More", Mae smiled and demanded, a tingle in her fingertips. And Ter followed, chasing her dreams and fears away until nothing but love and their future was left.

This is a thank you and sorry to my dear dear friend @ommited-miscellaneously because of all the pain and angst I unleashed at them. Hope this will soothe the wounds a bit ❤️🌈

#3 will be free #3wbf drabbles #3wbf #3wbf rewatch #angst #making out #the storm is so loud I couldn't sleep anyway

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morathicain · 1 year

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Phon’s touch was a familiar one, a safe one, despite still making her heart race, making her wonder sometimes, in secret, how she deserved this man, his support and love as big as an ocean, forever steady and strong.

Mae still remembered the first time he’d taken her hand, even if she’d lost count of their touches after that. As kids he’d seen her getting bullied by some children and he’d jumped between them, already smaller than her back then, fierce and without a fear. And afterwards, after the fight she’d watched with wide eyes and her troubled heart on her sleeve, he’d offered his hand with a smile and a promise. Little had she known back then, where life would lead them, what they’d become to each other. But she’d known already, that he’d get stuck to her soul, no matter where their paths would lead them.

Since then, Phon had taken her hand often. At first innocently, casually but each time a wonder to Mae, a glimmering hope. It became the daily part of her life, something to look forward to, something that changed, slowly, to a different one, a yearning one. Mae didn’t try to set her hopes up but then it came, the day Phon held on, held her hand with a new, with a different purpose, his smile lopsided and his fingers trembling.

And Mae realised: she wasn’t alone in this.

Phon became her partner, her equal, her support and her love, by her side whether she was strong or weak, whether she cried or laughed. His touch was a grounding one, the butterflies in her chest forever rising.

Ter’s touch was a surprise. A long awaited one. And Mae hadn’t even realised it.

There was something very hesitant to it, unsure if he was allowed and it reminded Mae of herself, back at her beginning with Phon. To not know if one was welcome and to stop, even if only for a second, before reaching out.

She’d only asked for his touch because she’d been so lonely. Because she missed Phon and felt lost in this cruel world, her only companion a man who never smiled. But when he’d lied down next to her, his back touching hers, his heat seeping into the mattress and her skin, she’d felt weirdly at home. A fragile home maybe, a temporary one, but it was the rock in the storm she’d been searching for. And so she reached our further, she reached out further and with a purpose, just to reassure herself, just to settle down.

They were partners but they were not equals and still ... still! Mae watched Ter smile for the first time, after all the scolding she’d done, after all the conditions she’d uttered. And he stayed. He stayed and came back each time, taking whatever she had to say, however honest and brutal she had to be. But she couldn’t stay silent, couldn’t just hope this time. Mae was reaching out and Ter didn’t even flinch anymore, just let her take and take and take ...

Ter’s touch was a surprisingly soft one, his fingers curling around Mae’s hesitant but with a purpose, a question, a promise. And as Mae’s fingers tightened around his, her mind in a fuzzy maze, she felt at peace.

“P’Mae ...”

Her name, softly spoken by wondering lips, felt like honey to her soul and with a shuddering breath, Mae held on, determined to never let go.

There was a new love in Ter’s touch and Mae was eager to lose count once more.

#3 will be free #3wbf #3wbf rewatch #TerMaePhon #sorry not sorry #went through my screenshots and found those and had to do this #let's all imagine Mae woke up to a very alive and happy Ter #and they lives happily ever after #<3 #3wbf drabbles

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morathicain · 1 year

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The parallel between those shots! The fact that both Miw and Neo hide something (the pillow) and are trying to protect themselves (for good reasons) while Shin is all open with his feelings on his sleeve.

Shin’s world was turned upside down and he found himself in a free fall, unable to catch his breath. Stuck between two forces, overwhelmed and his heart beating loud enough for the world to hear, he wondered how he’d ended up right here. He’d felt comfortable with Miw only a few hours back, but right now her walls were up again, too high to climb or approach. And Neo? Looking at Neo felt like looking at the sun, like touching the hot stove on purpose. There were too many emotions written on the man’s face and it still wasn’t all, wasn’t enough and Shin had the urge to draw back and run away. If Neo couldn’t even look at him properly, if he was kept at such a distance, what should he even stay for? Ah, the accident, he remembered, his racing heart resembling a panicking rabbit. The accident and fight which had killed Phon. And he still didn’t understand how it had happened, why it had to happen and he wondered if he could have stopped it. If he’d had the power to stop it all and he wished himself back to it. Just so he didn’t have to sit next to two people burning too hot to touch. Helpless, he watched them argue, ready to bite each other’s heads off and he wondered, why he was even here, what this was even about. But he couldn’t leave, couldn’t even attempt to leave. He may feel alone between the overgrown walls Neo and Miw had put up. And he may feel insignificant next to them, too small in front of their storms brewing, but he could neither move nor run. He could only stick, trying with a quiet voice to leave a mark and not be left behind. And he wished. Wished to matter.

@ommited-miscellaneously @teresis

#3 will be free #3wbf rewatch #3wbf drabbles #love the colours and the whole set up of those two shots and had to write something for it #just them clutching to the pillow #as they hide and protect themselves #and Shin desperately tries to be a part of them and to understand #also Neo's disshevelled look is damn hot #words were written #thank you #feel free to reblog

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