i do think the worst thing abt being ill rn is that i am. Scared to Eat. like even if its a food i know i CAN eat i find myself avoiding it bc What If This Time it makes me Sick.
Like a genuine fear to the point i'm starting to worry about it. I couldn't bring myself to eat a 'probably safe' food for nearly 24 hours today, so I just didn't eat. I had to wait to go to the store and get a Definitely Safe food. And even then I can only eat a little bit before I get anxious again. which means im usually too tired to cook my safe foods. which means I Don't Eat. and it goes On and On and On.
like ik the human brain/body automatically tries to Avoid being in Pain but. if we could do that while also being Normal about my food intake that would be great! The broccoli isnt going to kill us! The single slice of turkey isn't going to kill us! The Hummus we've eaten with no issue for the last 3 days isn't going to kill us! Please!!
3 notes
·
View notes
Begrudgingly trying to look for a new phone because my current one (which I’ve had for 8 years) is having some issues but like......hhh.. Every person I know who has a newer phone like.. theirs SUCKS lol.. you can’t take the back off/battery out, some you can’t even change out the microSD because apparently they expect you to just use evil ~~cloud storage~~ or whatever nonsense, they come with so many apps built in which you can disable but not fully delete (wasting space on the phone), can’t control when updates happen, one of my friend’s has to be connected to the internet just to get voicemails??? like having to be connected to wifi or mobile data just for some BASIC functionalities is insane (I prefer to keep my internet disabled at all times unless using it, hate the idea of just being internet connected constantly in the background and having all these apps sending and receiving data and giving dumbass notifications when I’m not even actively using them), SOME of them don’t even have a built-in GENERIC notes app or media player (like I’m just supposed to download spotify instead of using my collection of youtube to mp3 files?? lmao) or photo viewer (I know someone who doesn’t have a generic ‘photos’ app, just “Google Photos’ which prompts them to make an account and login every time they open the wretched thing), etc. etc. etc.
Genuinely, if it weren’t for my need to be able to use the internet to map and check bus directions/look up things on the go when needed, organize/transport files, and take photos on a whim when I may not have my camera with me - I would legit just get one of those basic non-smart phones where you can only text and make calls lol ... alas... ToT
15 notes
·
View notes
You know how a pretty obvious majority of kinksters are submissives? You want to know a big part of the reason why it's hard to find a dom that's into the same hard kink you are?
Ask a hardcore masochist what they think of being whipped.
Then ask a hard sadist what they think of whipping someone.
Do you notice that the sadist/dom will often either dance around an answer or try to use soothing language/euphemism not unlike the way how in many places people are still expected to discuss sex if at all. Gentle, calculated language.
The issue is, especially with a new surge of purity culture overtaking so-called "leftist" online circles, is that fantasy becomes a moral judgement.
Sub with a noncon kink: "I want to be raped" (cnc but like. People can talk ab it how they want don't cancel me fr.)
Response from Normies: "well that's weird and kinda dark but ok"
Dom with a noncon kink: "I want to rape"
Response from Normies: "I'm calling the police and you should kys and you're also a sexual abuser and even though you haven't said anything about kids you're also also a pedophile :)"
Not only does the attitude of murderous hatred against doms/tops with hard kinks/fetishes/paraphilias make it difficult for them to practice those kinks (safely and ethically) out of fear of social backlash if it's ever found out even if both they and their partner[s] had a great time and are fine-- but, it actively puts innocent people in danger by equating thoughts and attractions of ANY KIND to the act of hurting others against their will. It equates fantasy, which can oftentimes be played out safely if in a modified way with real harmful actions.
Also, kink is still illegal in many places, so don't "its illegal" me about harder kinks. Law is not morality, none of us are free until all of us are free, etc. You get the gist.
You want to see more doms? Meet someone who can indulge your "scary badwrong" sexy feelings? Then maybe don't actively promote a culture where you put ANY kind of attraction or kink under fire. It doesn't matter if it'd be unethical to act out in real life. Some of the most common kinks worldwide are unethical as fuck to act out irl, including rape. That's why we have cnc, come on, guys.
You know what? In fact, you SHOULD actively shun people who shame others for their sexual feelings. EVEN if you think it's gross. EVEN if it wouldn't be ethical to act on irl. Let these types know that their puritan ideals are NOT accepted here. Let them know that if they want to go to church they can do that but not in your space, not forcing other (non consenting!) people to listen to their hateful and repressive ideology.
Like, hey, I'm not into ABDL, for example. But I will defend to the death other people's right to be into that. To think and feel whatever they think and feel. You think diapers are sexy? Great! I don't personally see the appeal, but you do you boo. There is no Correct Way to be sex/kink negative. Either you believe in thought crime or you don't.
And yes, this post includes "harmful" paraphilias (I put it in quotes because they're only harmful if acted on), sadomasochism, mutilation fetishism, etc etc. Every "gross" or "evil" kink, fetish, para you can possibly imagine. The stuff that makes you horny is just stuff that makes you horny, and being horny is normal. Being "weird horny" is also normal. No one deserves to experience shame, let alone public harassment or hate over feelings they most of the time don't Choose to have. Be mindful of puritan rhetoric and strike it down when you see it.
6K notes
·
View notes