Tumgik
#(btw this is a play on 'I am not god's strongest soldier')
kirby-the-gorb · 8 months
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lesbianrobin · 1 year
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the absolute rollercoaster lucas has been on ever since he met max like new girl in town -> new girl is cool and cute -> new girl might like me -> oh no she has a racist brother -> oh she DEFINITELY likes me -> oh no her racist brother is trying to kill me -> oh phew i'm okay AND SHE'S THREATENING TO SMASH HIS DICK WITH A NAIL BAT -> cool girlfriend secured -> cool girlfriend dumps me -> cool girlfriend takes me back -> repeat this like five times -> oh nice her racist brother's gone -> oh no she's deeply depressed -> oh no she dumped me for real -> oh no she's being hunted by an inter-dimensional serial killer -> but she still likes me :) -> but she's still deeply depressed -> she uses herself as bait and i am solely responsible for her survival -> i get held at gunpoint and then get in a fistfight with the guy who gave me my first beer -> i see her get every bone in her body snapped right before my eyes and hold her as she's dying -> btw the guy i fought gets his body torn in half while he's still alive and this happens like five feet away from me -> suddenly her heart just starts beating again?! -> she's alive! -> but she's comatose :/ -> my cool girlfriend is in the hospital and i have a concussion and my face is busted and my entire town is about to be consumed by an abyss to hell.
also your sister is there calling you a loser the whole time and your friends are mean to you for wanting to play a sport and make friends. lucas sinclair is god's strongest soldier.
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svturn-exe · 10 months
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super important tmc hcs. ignoring the fact tht terraria and minecraft both came out in 2011
adam terraria: starts a new world every week bc it forgets what he's supposed to be doing next and it never occurs to him to look it up. bro doesn't even know the wiki Exists. never gets to hardmode bc he insists on playing master difficulty and also is bad at the game minecraft: exclusively plays creative mode in superflat worlds. makes ugly box structures out of diamond blocks and performs horrible labrat experiments on mobs in them
jonah terraria: almost exclusively plays journey mode! makes it his mission every time to 100% the research catalogue. the collection aspect of it tickles something in their brain minecraft: exclusively plays modded with like 20 different incredibly complicated tech mods tht each have a 200 page user manual . and also tinker's construct. they r a pro at it
mark terraria: gets to hardmode on expert mode, delves into the underground hallow bc he's excited to explore, gets jumpscared by a naturally spawning hallowed mimic and has a fucking heart attack minecraft: mark operates out of a dirt hut and yknow what fuck you they like it that way. brother rocking the greentop with the oak door. half the floor is gravel. no glass or trap doors for windows, just 1 block holes in the walls and one of the "windows" is blocked by a double chest. fully enchanted netherite and elytra btw
cesar has never played a video game. walks in2 marks room like are ya winnin, bro?
sarah terraria: plays w so many mods and texture packs the game is nigh unrecognizable. plays exclusively master mode and turns on every 'challenge' difficulty that comes with the mods at once bc she's seen the face of god and it was weeping minecraft: girlie is in the minigame servers. find sarah doing tnt run at 3 am she is going for it . good for her
evelin terraria: actually a pretty good builder. uses the wiki as a guide for npc happiness and builds little towns for them. beat moonlord like 2 months ago and just keeps going back to the same world to build stuff minecraft: plays adventure maps bc she thinks they're fun. evelin has played every minecraft horror adventure map that exists. i think she would love terra swoop force too dave terraria: once he gets far enough in a world to get access to wiring it's all over. spends the rest of the game trying to build machines to instant-ko bosses, with varying degrees of success. a master of the hoik minecraft: you know those videos that are like. using redstone to play minecraft in minecraft. yeah ruth terraria: plays vanilla summoner class in master mode for the worthy seed. she is god's strongest soldier and baby she's going for terraprisma. minecraft: spends the entire first night punching skeletons and creepers to death with her bare steve fists. has that Totally Legit Speedrun luck and finds everything she needs just from running around and raiding generated structures
thatcher terraria: terrible at building but god bless he's trying. favorite part of the game is old one's army, and she spends hours grinding to collect all of the sentries and the armor sets. somehow gets spawn camped by a crawdad and cries minecraft: keeps forgetting that you shouldn't make eye contact with endermen and it scares the shit out of her every time. is prone to lava-based mining incidents
jude tries to download minecraft free minecraft cracked no virus 100% safe trust me :) dot exe. is shocked when he gets a virus. how can this be
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azriaann · 3 months
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sorry guys i’ve been thrown into a fairy tail obsession recently after not touching the series since i was like 15 so bear with me💀
but after catching up with the series, there is genuinely no way that natsu wouldn’t feel guilty about burning lucy after his loss of control in 100yq chapter 20ish (idk the exact chapter my bad😕). like you’re telling me this mf who blames himself constantly for other people’s injuries and shit wouldn’t lose his mind over accidentally hurting his best friend?!?!? it doesn’t really make sense to me. like i get that this series isn’t really marked by tangible character development or critical conversations between characters but come ON!!!! you’re telling me he just jokes about it?!?! i KNOW that he can be written in a way that allows him to reflect on his actions, we’ve seen it before (most notably during the gmg+eclipse arc) so i just don’t understand why there wouldn’t be an internal conflict, even if it’s just about his demonic origin and its way of making him lose himself. like maybe i missed something because i didn’t fully reread the entire thing since i just don’t care about any of the new characters (i am only here to see what happens with nalu🫡gods strongest soldier of the slow burn war).
i am glad tho that the series is FINALLY expanding upon his “struggle” (putting it in apostrophes because it’s not exactly a full-blown struggle yet LMAO) because i always felt that there is so much more to natsu as END than was originally written ig. they’ve got this strong main character who has always been fighting for the good side who now has this massive connection to the strongest “evil” wizard in the series, obviously they can do sooooo much more with it… so im glad that it’s finally coming to light😋😋😋 and surely it comes back, it feels like lucy saying that “that was the first time [his] flames scared her” will surely come back into play when they eventually fight ignia again (which made me lose my mind btw😭 LIKE UR KIDDING THATS CRAZY). i’m hoping that lucy’s hesitance to join the fight in the most recent chapter (which.. yes is because it’s athena and lucy always forms super deep bonds with people lol love her) could also be a partial fear of seeing nat’s lose control again…. sorry yall I LOVE ANGST IN STORIES AND THERES SO KUCH POTENTIAL HERE… really hoping that the writers don’t drop the ball (this time…).
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charmcoin · 11 days
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i am literally god's strongest soldier rn btw because i could very easily throw the rest of my night away playing maplestory. but i'm not. even though i want to
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boxesblr · 2 years
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I'm unapologetically a comfort bug btw. Life's uncomfortable enough i don't need to push myself any more than just dealing with that. Gonna wake up at 10am, carry a blanket to my desk to do my work and play my games, and eat my unexciting yet comforting food. I am not one of god's strongest soldiers I am treating myself to rewatching because my tummy hurt
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swynlake-spill · 4 months
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BOBA I neeeeeeed your opinion on the Tom x Snow x Gem situation!! How have you stayed silent!! I need to know what to think.
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this. drama. had. everything.
SCREAMING. CRYING. SEX. AFFAIRS. did anyone else hear snow song accuse tom of using her for sex??? but then she was like 'actually gem morey is a better lay anyway!!!' like i went through every emotion i was laughing i was crying i was aghast i was hurt i was betrayed i was appalled i was shaking my first at tom i was cursing snow song for sending the feminist movement back fifty years--
gem morey looked fucking HOT the entire time btw that outfit was like SO chuck bass circa season 4 episode 9 no wonder snow cheated on tom like me too girly!! i am not god's strongest soldier!
wish we could TiVo real life events so i could play it whenever i need to feel something
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makeste · 3 years
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BnHA Chapter 292: You Say Jeans
Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “well anyway here’s that Touya reveal I foreshadowed like a million years ago, viva la 2020.” Dabi was all “hello world, I’ve killed 30 people and today I’m going to explain to you all why” before he proceeded to explain ABSOLUTELY NOTHING but everyone was so distracted by his tale of child abuse and hero conspiracies that they didn’t much seem to notice. Can’t Ya See-Kun’s Shark Friend was all “IS THIS THE END OF HERO SOCIETY AS WE KNOW IT”, and Horikoshi was all “STAY TUNED”, and then Dabi set himself on fire and leaped off of Machia’s back like the chaotic evil, I-just-bleached-all-my-brain-cells weird little fire man he is, ready to burn everyone to crispy bits before they could even react properly to his whole big revenge speech. Fortunately he did not succeed on account of THE RETURN OF THE JING, THE JOAT, BEST FUCKING JEANIST, back from the dead by popular demand in what critics are calling “the best fucking comeback since Jesus himself.”
Today on BnHA: Best Jeanist snatches up Machia and the rest of the League with his fiber steel cables before you can say “more like BEAST JEANIST amirite.” Dabi gets all worked up and lights Hadou on fire which is a real JERK MOVE, and is all “THIS RIGHT HERE IS ALSO ENDEAVOR’S FAULT”, which, NOT SUPER CONVINCED ON THAT, BUT OKAY. Anyway so then he burns up all the cables holding him which is crazeballs btw, and then he and Shouto start fighting, and so basically the whole thing is a literal hot mess and we’ll see how that goes. Meanwhile Tomura wakes up and summons some Noumus, and poor Jeanist has to deal with those on top of the still-attempting-to-rampage Gigantomachia, and everyone else is all “we can’t help you on account of we’re all half dead”, and so it’s looking really bad. And then -- and I can’t stress enough how much I don’t even have the faintest idea how to segue into this next part -- the chapter ends with Mirio!?! just sort of POPPING UP OUT OF THE GROUND all, “SURPRISE, BITCH”, and it literally was so surprising that I am still just kind of speechless. WELL-PLAYED, I GUESS, lol wtf.
lol okay so the first page in the RHA scan is just the “three musketeers” movie promo image that we all already saw a few days ago. but it does confirm that (a) it is indeed a movie, and (b) that it’s set for a summer 2021 release! how exciting
okay so now back to our special Dabi edition of Making a Murderer
“ray of hope” oh hell yes. SAVE US MR. JEANIST
I guess he had a TV in his private hero jet or something?
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gotta say, “dammit Dabi” does not even remotely sound like Authentic Best Jeanist Dialogue to me though. gonna need Caleb to see to this. well but what do you guys think? does Best Jeanist curse?? I personally feel like he’s one of those guys who NEVER EVER swears no matter what, except under the most hilariously trifling circumstances. like he’s eating an avocado one day and he accidentally stains the cuffs of his beloved jostume green and he’s all “FUCK”
btw how fucking rich is Best Jeanist though that he has his own fucking plane? the thought just suddenly occurred to me, you know? like even Endeavor, whose agency has its own on-site luxury apartment suites for all of his interns, still drives around in a dinky little car that Bakugou has declared to be too small. which, I guess we know why he felt that way now, seeing as the guy he previously interned with apparently gets around in Jeans Force One
anyway so back to the part where Jeanist shows up to save the day!! YEAH JEANIST WOOOOO
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ILU JEANIST YOU REALLY ARE THE BEST!! HUGS AND KISSES!!!
lmao we just saw Gigantomachia take out like a hundred guys not ten chapters ago. and Best Jeanist shows up and takes him down in like two seconds. HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES LEAGUE OF VILLAINS. BET YOU’RE WISHING YOU’D TAKEN HIS QUIRK NOW, AFO. GET FUCKED YOU OLD SPUD
KACCHAN IS SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM AWW
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SIDE NOTE, IIDA, YOU AND I ARE GONNA HAVE WORDS LATER ABOUT YOU ACTUALLY AGREEING TO PUT HIM BACK DOWN. YOU DO UNDERSTAND THAT THIS CHILD IS STILL DRIPPING BLOOD ALL OVER THE PLACE FROM HIS MULTIPLE STAB WOUNDS, RIGHT? WAY TO ASSERT YOUR AUTHORITY THERE. I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE CLASS PRESIDENT NOT THE CLASS CLOWN, COME ON NOW
LMAO DABI IS FRANTICALLY TRYING TO DO THE PLOT MATH
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SHOULDA CHECKED MORE CLOSELY MY GOOD MARK. LOOKS LIKE YOU MISSED THE “MADE IN CHINA” STICKER ON THE BOTTOM. YOU HAVE BEEN BAMBOOZLED. OR ACTUALLY, I GUESS THE MORE ACCURATE WORD HERE IS JAMBOOZLED, AHAHAHAHA. JEANS
HOLY SHIT DABI
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I legit almost thought that was Tomura for a second. you two look so alike now with the white hair and the crazy eyes
meanwhile, Shouto is still crying and it’s a lot to take, you guys. lotta feels
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ffff come on Jeanist you better do something awesome again here, the mood of the chapter is starting to slip now
YES, GOOD, THAT’LL WORK
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WELL YOU TELL ME, SPINNER. I GUESS THAT MEANS BEST JEANIST IS OFFICIALLY THE STRONGEST CHARACTER IN THE SERIES NOW. SORRY I DON’T MAKE THE RULES
ffff now Spinner is trying to wake Tomura back up. nah, how’s about we not do that
OH MY GOD HADOU YESSSS
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MY GIRL OUT HERE WITH THE “NO THANK YOU” BOUT TO CURBSTOMP THE BIG BAD WITH HER QUIRK KSFHLKLK WHO HERE HAD “HADOU SAVES THE DAY” ON YOUR WAR ARC BINGO CARDS, YOU LOVE TO SEE IT!!
HEY!!!!
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fucking son of a... fffkfkff... someone please reassure me that fire isn’t Hadou’s weakness. someone. anyone. also could someone please dial an ambulance and send them to Horikoshi’s house. but not just yet. first I’m gonna need you to wait about fifteen minutes or so while I take care of some things
well all right then, Dabi. so you wanna go on then and explain to us all how this, too, is somehow Endeavor’s fault?
oh I see, you’ve decided that since he’s responsible for “creating” you, everyone you hurt and kill is in truth really being hurt and killed by him! well now, that sure is convenient as fuck I guess
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(ETA: that’s a nice effect with the panel sides getting all warped by Dabi’s quirk though, just noticed that.)
amazing how quickly you used up that sympathy card my guy. Shouto please kick his ass, I’m fucking done lol, you can all sort out the rest in therapy later
CAN SOMEONE PLEASE DIAL BACK DEKU’S EMPATHY STATS JUST A LITTLE BIT, HOLY --
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“TODOROKI-KUN IS HURT THE MOST”, HE SAYS, WITH HIS ARM BONES SHATTERED INTO LITTLE TOOTHPICK-SIZED PIECES. I MEAN, HE’S PROBABLY TALKING MORE ABOUT MENTAL ANGUISH GIVEN THE CONTEXT HERE, BUT STILL. THAT’S ENOUGH HEROICS FROM YOU ALREADY FOR ONE DAY
NOOO JEANIST
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LOTS OF SMOKE IN THE AIR RIGHT ABOUT NOW AND MY BOY’S STILL DOWN A LUNG. GOD DAMMIT
“if the number one suffers a total loss here, this country will fall to pieces” well okay, real talk though, I think the “country falling to pieces” part is pretty much unavoidable at this juncture. you all are just gonna have to try your best to pick up those pieces after the fact and see what you can do with them. if I were you I’d be less worried about the number one’s reputation and more concerned with the half-dozen child soldier interns who are still on the field and very much at risk of being burned to death should you suffer that “total loss.” please try to keep it together here for them
OH FOR FUCK’S
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I really thought RockLockRock was gonna come into play here. USE YOUR QUIRK TO LOCK THE ROPES IN PLACE YOU DIP!! if he seriously just sits there and does nothing when his quirk could be the deciding factor I am cancelling his useless ass cute kid or no cute kid shfkjdls
(ETA: is he even there?? did he and Manual just hightail it out of there?? “well good luck, children.”)
also, we’ll put this aside for now to perhaps speculate about later, but what’s with Tomura remembering his dad’s house yet again in that far right panel?? and being itchy again?? I still have yet to fully work out the psychological mechanisms at work as far as his itchiness goes, so I’ll admit this is intriguing to me. it seemed like it was connected to his decay quirk, but then why is it acting up again now. what is this lol
yuh oh
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forgot about these guys. looks like these heroes aren’t having such a fun time
oh fucksticks
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excuse me ma’am but I don’t like this. you do know that my kids are all there, right. all burnt and impaled and broken-boned and the like. well except for Iida. he’s fine still. BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN I FEEL LIKE WATCHING HIM GET TORN APART BY FOUR HIGH ENDS, WTF
HORIKOSHI YOU MOTHERFUCKER I SWEAR TO GOD
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god fucking... okay look. Horikoshi. you win, okay!? congratulations, you win, this is your show and we’re all just sitting here at your mercy. fine. go ahead and just kill off everyone ever, then!! what am I even gonna do about it. stop reading?? fuck
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this whole thing really went from zero to fucked before I could even blink huh. I really thought this was gonna be a turning point chapter for the heroes. shows what I know I guess??
meanwhile this motherfucker is just SCREAMING
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ngl, if I wasn’t currently terrified on account of things suddenly taking such a drastic turn for the worse, this would be the coolest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. Jeanist my man, I hype you up like it’s my job because you are the greatest fucking meme character in the history of time, but make no mistake, you are also highkey WORTH ALL THE HYPE AND THEN SOME
seriously, though. don’t fucking mind him you guys, he’s just standing here in the coolest pose of all time taking on Gigantomachia all alone with one fucking lung because the substance pumping through his veins is COLD-BLOODED LIQUID DENIM, and DENIM FEELS NO FEAR
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Best Jeanist really needs to get his own theme song. -- oh my god I just finally thought of a title for this post. lmao and it’s the dumbest thing. omg
MEANWHILE THE TODOROKI BROS ARE OFF IN THEIR OWN DRAMATIC LITTLE FIRE WORLD
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which one do you think is the Mario and which is the Luigi. well, but I mean, Dabi clearly thinks that he’s the Luigi though and that’s why he’s so mad. nobody wants to be Luigi. what a life
THAT’S IT, SHOUTO!! POINT OUT ALL OF HIS HYPOCRITICAL BULLSHIT, I WANT ANSWERS
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JUST TO CLARIFY, IT’S THAT NATSU, NOT SOME OTHER NATSU!! SO WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF!!
OH, WELL IN THAT CASE
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BUT OF COURSE. THAT WOULD MAKE IT ALL WORTHWHILE, holy shit. okay I’m just gonna go ahead and say it, Dabi is a piece of work. I really thought this arc would make him more sympathetic at long last, but it seems like it’s doing just the opposite?? this is like an anti-redemption arc. I don’t relish the thought of venturing into the fandom tags once I finish reading this lol
(ETA: well folks, I’ve done it. and actually it was pretty interesting because there are apparently like ten different things that people are mad about, and so it’s like. each post is a new adventure lmao.)
so Shouto is all “BRUH HAVE YOU COMPLETELY LOST IT” and Dabi is all “YES”, basically? like, he says he’s completely lost his feeling for anything. omg. but you were so sweet. how does that even happen
“finally I can kill you” okay for real what the heck is your damage bro?? can we not. I like Shouto just the way he is, un-killed
oh shit and now the Noumus are here
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cue Bakugou diving in to save his mentor, STAB WOUNDS BE DAMNED!! actually it would make more sense for it to be Iida, but if Kacchan is really fixin’ to go full Shounen Dumbass here then he might as well go all out, y’know
-- unless of course, Deku decides to activate another quirk??
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“last I checked, the main character of this series was still me” OH? WELL I SUPPOSE THAT IS TRUE, SO PRAY TELL, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT LEFT UP YOUR SLEEVE YOU SUICIDAL BRUSSELS SPROUT
fucking love how he’s all “HAHAHA WITH MY NEW QUIRKS I CAN STILL DO STUPID SHIT EVEN WITH MY ARMS AND LEGS GROUND TO A FINE POWDER” btw. what can I say. Deku gonna Deku
FMMFHDKUHK W H A T
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HOLY SHIT. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. WHAT THE WHAT. QUE THE FUCK
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(ETA: okay look, all the love in the world to the brave scanlators who take time out of their lives to translate the leaks every week just so we can read the chapter a couple of days early like the addicts we are. that said, translating Mirio’s signature “POWER!!” -- which was already written in English in the original scan -- to “POG-CHAMP” is just a whole new level of wtfuckery from them lmao. is the Lida person back at it again?? amazing.)
MIRIO!?!?! SHOWS UP TO SAVE THE DAY?!?! POGS HIMSELF UP OUT THE GROUND TO BEAT THE NOUMUS LIKE IT AIN’T NO THING. JUST LIKE WE ALL PREDICTED!? I’M SORRY, DID YOU NOT SEE THAT COMING?? YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOUR DAILY HOROSCOPE FROM ASTROLOGY DOT COM DIDN’T HAVE THAT ONE IN THE CARDS?? WAS IT NOT OBVIOUS?? TODOROKIS PLUS BEST JEANIST EQUALS MIRIO??
hot damn. Tintin really saw the writing on the wall with the impending Dabi Discourse and was all “NOT SO FAST” lmao. “HERE’S A BRAND NEW THING FOR YOU ALL TO DISCOURSE ABOUT” MIRIO YOU WILD CHILD. YOU GLORIOUS THUG
MEANWHILE LET’S NOT FORGET WHAT MIRIO HAVING HIS POWERS BACK ACTUALLY IMPLIES. HOLY SHIT. SUDDENLY WE CUT BACK TO ALL MIGHT’S OFFICE, ALL THE WAY BACK AT UA. ERI BRANDISHES HER TOKOYAMI-GIFTED BUSTER SWORD, A DETERMINED GLEAM IN HER EYE. “I HEARD YOU WERE TRYING TO HAVE A GIRL POWER ARC WITHOUT ME.” OH. MY. GOD
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snowtimeisbesttime · 3 years
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Thoughts and questions on Hiveswap Act 2– Part 1.
**DISCLAIMER** I haven't played through the entire game yet! I got to the intermission in the whole trial thingy, and will continue tomorrow! Therefore, I Am Not Looking at anything yet, only posting. I'll probably come back and edit this once I've actually finished the game.
-Did the default names for Xefros & Dammek's lusii change?? I loaded my Act 1 save, and I'm sure they had their default names (Zoosmell and Cornibuster) there, though I'm also pretty sure i accidentally unlocked the “name the lusii” achievement on that save by clicking on the text windows without actually changing their names so... Dammek's lusus is called Toothy now i guess?
-On that note, if Xefros' lusus died I'm going to fucking scream. Even though I'm pretty sure we've barely seen him on screen since like the end of Act 1 but Regardless.
-We see Charun's cave, and it turns out they were neighbours with Zebede all this time, but they're nowhere to be seen at the train?? unless they grabbed an earlier one... Charun did get a death flag the size of the pacific ocean, when interacting with their weird sculpture with a lot of legs and arms surrounding a mouth, but Zebede's just gone without a trace? The bees are gone and there's a hole in the side of his hive, but his lusus doesn't seem to be particularly upset? And neither is Charun's, assuming that huge bug near the cave is their lusus. (Idarat the canon fantroll #3 doesn't appear at the train either, but that's probably for the same reason there aren't any jade or teal background characters: to keep the court scene neat)
-The drones are supposed to be en route to the station, supposedly to fix the ticket machines but probably to cull whoever tripped the alarm on them... i sure hope they don't follow the train or anything orz
-Mostly everyone seems to resemble their respective Friendsims, more or less:
Fozzer appears to be scratched still, yet more philosophical. Also he's not in the train either.
Folykl seems just a touch friendlier than in her friendsim (and Kuprum's still just as hyped about becoming a helmsman as before, even if he seems to know more details about it now).
Chixie's more anxious, probably because it seems she's been doing stuff as The Mask for a while now, and she's going to fuck shit up at Jeevik Week. She says she's not alone in that, and considering it's apparently confirmed that the random troll from her good end Was Dammek all this time... is she also actively in the rebellion? Also is it just me or does her sprite look somewhat scribblier than everyone else's? Even the background characters??
Elwurd's pretty much the same, and it does seem her flirting with Joey was mostly to try and get her to buy something. Also... if her fake tickets were so good, why didn't she just use them, instead of giving them to Joey and Xefros? Like, I get Marvus and Boldir Knowing Stuff, but her?
Zebruh's paying attention to Marvus instead of Chixie, which. Small mercies. He's still a dick, and we're still doing the whole “clowns are peak oppressed” thing.
Marvus seems to still be perfectly nice to the main characters, and perfectly willing to let other people die in order to help them advance (getting Zebruh to sign up for Slam or Get Culled, Daraya if you fuck up in the trial thing, Hopefully Not Any More Cases...) He is helping Tyzias out with her defensive legislaceration experiments, though, and basically everyone who isn't Joey seems to think he might flip his shit and murder someone, as clowns do. At least people don’t seem to lose their minds around him anymore.
Vikare's basically the same, but Joey immediately picks up on his Jake Vibes and instinctively dislikes him.
Diemen eats people???????? as in, actively????????? wtf?????????
Skylla seems to be pretty much the same, but she's obviously worried because Ladyy's sick!! God I fucking hope we do get to help her out before the end of the game.
Marsti's also friendlier than she was in her volume, though I remember MSPAR was particularly prone to sticking their foot in their mouth in that one.
Cirava's surprisingly more trusting than they were in their volume (and also, their eye's light green and not teal). Also, apparently they gouged their other eye out on stream?????? as in live???? besides that, good to see not All of the powerful psionics get succesfully indoctrinated.
Polypa's also rather willing to help out, though we still don't know what the heck happened to her.
Boldir's suitably mysterious, and probably also involved with the rebellion... she does call Xefros “burgundy figurehead”.
Konyyl and Azdaja are still having relationship stuffs, but in the end they clearly care the most about each other. (he still doesn't seem to give a fuck about helm stuffs so far?) The question is, who exactly were they hunting down??
The jades and the teals are basically the same as their Friendsim incarnations, as far as I've seen. The one major change to the jades (besides jade lore which i'll discuss further down) seems to be that hatched2dance is now one of the biggest reasons for their fights, and Bronya does get a crunchy bit of Backstory (the jade from her past that got culled because of the Rainbow Hemotions saga, which is also the reason she's so hard on Daraya now)
On the teals, Stelsa and Tyzias seem to have a teensy bit of quadrant vacillation going on?? Tirona seems to be more focused on becoming a history revisionist than a memeagandist now, and it would also seem that Tegiri's the one into vampires now (or at least, Tagora's better at hiding it And a lot better at not getting involved with the whole mess that is whatever the heck the jades are doing)
-Psionics can have single-colored eyes!! tbh we'd already seen this back in Tegiri's route in Friendsim but it's good to Actually See it visually.
-Also, nice to see that Xefros *can* go toe to toe with the strongest psionic we know in all of Hiveswap! (95% sure that I've seen someone theorize something like this might happen?? I personally wasn't expecting it here but anyways Xefros you're doing amazing sweetie) What's not so nice is that he's only shown this strength when Azdaja hurt Joey (as far as i've played of course)... so unless he like unlocks his potential or something so he can do Big Psychics without seeing his friends get hurt beforehand we're in for some Angst.
-Also if Marvus got his ticket from Cridea (and Chixie won hers in like a raffle or something) then why couldn't she have given Xefros and Dammek some?? like, Dammek's been to one Jeevik Week already. Fiamet also told her about Joey, but by then they were already in the train.
-Me: Xefros' microphone's going to be important in act 2! Also me: *has to give it to fucking Zebruh to get his ticket*. Oh well, that's one thing for the Second Playthrough of Achievement Getting (plus: wearing the cone horns, having Joey introduce herself to Boldir, getting through the whole ace attorney segment without game overs...)
-We get the Quadrant Explanation #1000, sans auspisticism.
-It's vaguely implied that Dammek has also read some Soldier Purrbeasts books?? He's told Xefros the whole “death creates a bond deeper than matespritship or kismessisitude” thing, apparently! So if he's not secretly into troll warrior cats then. That sentence's more than mildly worrying??
-JADEBLOOD LOREDUMP PART THE NTEENTH: Okay first of all it's implied that More cloisters exist? Which in retrospect is pretty much obvious because you can't expect only six trolls to take care of All the troll grubs in existence. Also, the reason jades can't sneak out of the caverns anymore is “because they get Drone'd”, and it seems to be implied that they Can't go out At All*, which kinda contrasts with Friendsim (where literally all the jades snuck out of the caverns at least once: Lanque, Daraya and Wanshi in their own routes, Lynera in Vol 18, and Bronya in Vols 6 & 18). One of their tasks seems to be guarding Forbidden Literature, and Xefros states that they either cull or indoctrinate the most powerful psychic grubs.
-It's also stated that all of our jades were chosen for the cloister when they were basically wrigglers, while Lynera states in Friendsim that she's only been 2,43 sweeps in the caverns. (Considering Bronya's new backstory, it seems that capability to become a rainbow drinker ISN'T the qualifying factor for getting cloistered– depending on how exactly that jade died). It comes to mind that regular, non-cloistered jades might not really know about all these logistics, as it seems that at least Bronya wants to keep them secret– and therefore I don't have to go back and re-rewrite yet another chunk of Mirrorbent orz.
-Lastly, Xefros says they will all become nuns (btw, space church was mentioned in Lanque's route!) when they reach their Ordeals, and we already knew they'd be forced to live in isolation from Friendsim, but during the ace attorney thingy Lynera says she's NOT going to leave the planet because she'll become a midwife and tend to the Mother Grub (basically what we all thought jadebloods did back when we only had the ancestor stuff on Homestuck)... but either Daraya or Lanque told her that they weren't real? So either there's more jade propaganda that we didn't know about, or...
-*The one exception to this is, coincidentally, Jeevik Week, and it's apparently because Trizza herself made it so jades could go too, 3 or 4 sweeps before Hiveswap... why's that? What's so important about Jeevik Week that Trizza would do this? Iirc Cridea and Trizza were sort of set up as opposing forces (?? words), all the way back from the first bunch of concept arts we saw of them? The first thing we learnt from Trizza was that she was the “second best at memes”, and on Cridea's first appearance, when troll twitter was still Prongle, she said that some chick was stealing her memes... and now, Cridea has exactly one follower less than Trizza, who everyone in Alternia's forced to follow... would that person be the heiress herself?
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all-that-tmnt-jazz · 3 years
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Hi. Well this is my first ask emm. Could u do a 6.' Running from the police' with em? Like the reader is involved in some bad stuff, let's say that she and her friends are a very dangerous killers and gangsters that reached above the level of the foot clan, and as such they have also dangerous enemies. Long story short, the reader ( leader/ boss) gets ambushed and she ended up running from the police' after killing the aggressors. She have a thing for Raph btw. I'll totally understand if u won't do this bc is kinda _dark_ sooo. No hard feelings. Thank u.
Y’all, I got you.
Word Count: 1,162
Warnings: Hint at Violence/Gore
You had known this mission would have been dangerous. You had known that you or your girls would have been caught. You knew the group of you would get ambushed- it was inevitable at some point. 
You knew all of this, but you still followed through.
You just never knew that you would be ambushed by a vigilante who happened to be an amateur hockey player.
You knew your group could handle him but god damn was he leading them close to the police headquarters…
He was good, you had to admit. But he was predicting your group’s actions- they were being predictable, and they knew it, and they knew you would chime in. They shouldn’t rely on you like that, especially knowing they shouldn’t. They shouldn’t rely on you like that, especially since it had caused problems in the past.
The hockey-playing vigilante then… Stopped.
You saw his entire body tense, then relax, and you didn’t like the look on his face.
“Retreat! Retreat!” You called to your girls.
“What do you mean?” Monica- your lieutenant- asked as she still started following your lead.
“He led you to an ambush, goddammit! How did you-” 
A helicopter soon flew overhead, it’s spotlights glaring down at the streets below. 
“In the alleys! Divide and conquer! Don’t get caught!” you called. Your girls all dispersed- some turned on their heels and ran the way they came, some went into alleyways, and others made turns at every other block they came across. “Monica- go! I can’t have us both get caught!”
Monica looked at you, and you barely spared her a glance. She turned at the next block, leaving you to fight any future fight alone.
Having you alone was likely what the NYPD wanted, especially since they knew your name and have known it for a few years now.
How you’ve never gotten caught is a question none of your girls have ever dared to ask.
But now, the NYPD has you right in their corner. They have you exactly how they want you: 
Alone.
Defenseless.
Powerless.
Alone.
But they keep forgetting how powerful you are. They keep forgetting how easily you’ve defeated nearly all of the officers they had sent to defeat you.
You knew you had cars on your tail and officers ahead of you a few blocks. You had to get out of there fast and without being noticed by their eyes. 
You turned into an alleyway, pausing only a second to catch your breath before you were pulled behind a dumpster.
A large, scaly hand was wrapped around your mouth while another was wrapped around your arms and torso, keeping you immobile.
You screamed against the hand over your mouth, then started to bite it and drew blood. You kicked them as hard as you can and as often as you can, wherever you could reach.
“I am trying to help you,” growled the owner of the hand.
Your feet soon found their shins. You were able to kick off of them and throw the owner of the hand backward. Despite you falling with them, you were able to balance yourself and get out of their grasp.
To say you were shocked at their large appearance was an understatement. 
“Who are- what are you?” you asked angrily yet quietly. “I’m trying to not get caught and you kidnap me like some sort of-” 
They pulled you and threw you over their shell and threw something else onto the ground in front of them. A rally of officers entered the alleyway’s entrance.
“Raphael… Where did she go?” said a woman’s voice you recognized as Chief Rebecca Vincent.
“I took care of her… Here,” the owner of the hand and shell said, kicking over what he had thrown onto the ground.
You nearly screamed- it was one of your girls. One of your soldiers. Her face was virtually gone, beaten and bloodied and torn apart. 
“I found her in here and it seemed someone had already killed her, I just made sure to finish the job.” 
You drew blood from biting your lip so hard. 
Officers called for an EMT’s back up to help transport the body.
“Thank you, Raphael. You are relieved of your duties,” Chief Vincent said. Her assistant, Jade was immediately by her side. She went back into her vehicle.
The owner of the hand and shell- who you assumed was Raphael- rushed up to the roof, making sure to hide you from the view of the remaining officers.
They took you several blocks away from the scene. You didn’t even bother trying to escape- you were too shocked to even respond.
Once they put you down safely on a rooftop you glared at them.
“Who do you think you are? Killing my soldier!” You screamed, lunging at them.
“Hey, hey- I lied,” they responded. “I only found her there, I did nothing-”
“How can I believe you! I saw her!” You made a solid hit to the top of his monster-like chest, but you reacted more than he did. 
“I don’t kill, I swear-”
“Then why was she dead!” you made another unsuccessful lung toward him.
“She was dead when I found her!” He deflected you easily.
“Who are you, anyway?” You asked, sending him your deadliest glare.
“Um… Raphael. The strongest guy you’ll ever meet this side of anywhere.”
You looked him up and down as slowly as you could and you could tell it was making him uncomfortable- which was the exact point. You were impressed with his strong, muscular frame.
His feet were larger than life, and his legs were even more so. He had biceps and triceps to spare, and shoulders wide enough to block a garage door. His height was even more threatening, and the fact that he had a fucking shell…
Through all of this, his most endearing feature was his hazel-green eyes through a blood-red bandana that had you entranced.
“And you know who I am?”
“Who wouldn’t, (Y/N)(L/N). Well, known around New York and New England as the (F/C) Flame.”
You looked him up and down again, anger still boiling inside of your chest.
“Why didn’t you turn me in? You clearly work hand-in-hand with Little Miss Becca,” you asked, spitting out Chief Vincent’s name. He chuckled.
“You clearly have knowledge of fighting,” Raph said, stepping toward you. You squared up to him, craning your neck back to look at him.
“What’s it to you?”
“I’m thinking we can work together to overthrow ‘Little Miss Becca,’” he suggested, mocking your tone.
This caught your attention.
“You? Overthrowing her? Despite being her little pet?” you asked him, taking a step closer. He scoffed a laugh, also stepping forward.
“We all know the government’s busted,” Raphael said, stepping forward again. You nodded, agreeing.
“Broken and bruised,” you added.
You two were nearly touching, you realized. But you didn’t mind, really.
“Business partners?” he asked. You smiled.
“Business partners.”
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