So my boyfriend and I have a longstanding joke that Sarek would write at least One pulpy Vulcan-Human romance novels that heavily mirrors his relationship with Amanda, and yesterday we found an adequately terrible pulp romance novel with fantastic original art. So why not go the full nine yards.

Behold: the unreleased original cover for Illogical Desires: a Vulcan-Human romance novel

Hello dear people of the Star Trek fandom.

As you might know, several months ago this zine began work on it's second edition. To that end, we posted an interest check as a link to a Google form so we could get an accurate idea of how many people might actually purchase the zine. This is a critical step for us, because we endeavor to run this zine at a net-zero. No one makes any money off of this; not contributors, mods, editors, no one. To be frank, one of our editors spent several thousand dollars of their own money on the first edition because math is Really Hard. This was not an issue, but it's something we want to try and avoid in the future.

That interest check has been open for over a month and has had 29 responses. Honestly, we can't base our numbers off of that and we can't really continue to put in effort if it looks like the zine won't sell.

Below, we're going to put a poll in this post that will run for a week. Please reblog this post if you're in the Trek fandom and please respond. If we don't get a good number of responses on this poll, we are going to have to scrap the project and remain as a one-and-done zine.

Just so you're aware, our last zine was 151 pages and $25 for a physical copy, $15 for the merch, $7 for the PDF, and $35 for both the zine and merch (USD, not including shipping costs). We're working hard to bring those numbers down, especially the shipping costs, but we can't do our calculations without knowing who might be interested. We realize this post is long, but we wanted to be frank with you all. This project will be dead in the water if we don't know you're actually interested.

*reference -＞Princess Mononoke

Personally, I believe this is very suitable…

i literally can’t listen to tik tok by kesha without thinking about that goddamn star trek tos fanvid…you know the one

AO3 Top Relationships Bracket- Quarterfinals

This poll is a celebration of fandom history; we're aware that there are certain issues with many of the listed pairings and sources, but they are a part of that history. Please do not take this as an endorsement, and refrain from harassment.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)

"Can any one man be worth an entire universe?"

The Enemy Within is a really good episode when it comes to Kirk and the Triumvirate's dynamic.

In it, we have Kirk split in half. The good half, which has all of Kirk's positive traits but is also indecisive, uncertain, and even a little meek in comparison to normal. The bad Kirk is... well, an unpleasant maniac. Aggressive, impulsive, lack of empathy, all traits that most of us fear. And yet without it, without these negative aspects, Kirk isn't Kirk. A Kirk without any of his bad traits is just as incomplete as a Kirk without the good ones. He needs that decisiveness and aggression to push himself as a captain. To act. To command. We saw it in The Corbomite Manuver and this only helps reinforce it.

On the one hand, Kirk's struggling to function. On the other hand, he's still the captain. He can't allow himself to slip. He can't allow himself to show any weakness. Spock outright reinforces that to him, which in this case imo was the absolute worst move but it's absolutely in character for Spock and for this analysis as we'll see in a moment. Kirk is unwilling to relinquish command, so he tries to force himself to continue. But as time goes, his will continues to falter.

Things really get interesting, however, once they've finally captured the bad Kirk. If you go by production order, this is probably the first time we've had Kirk, Spock, and McCoy in a scene that lasts longer than a few seconds. On the one hand, we have Spock. He delves into how Kirk, without the bad half, is losing his ability to command. He's utterly blunt about it too, which isn't a surprise since this is Spock. The same guy who outright told Kirk not to divulge to the crew the exact details of the situation because it would damage Kirk's captain image and thus provoke a loss of faith by the crew. McCoy practically acts like he's offended on Kirk's behalf. The fact that to him, it sounds like Spock would dare even question Jim and his command ability speaks a LOT. Of course it's Spock's job and Kirk outright told him to do so if he saw him slipping, but McCoy doesn't know that nor would he really care in this instance. He tries to tell Jim that he can still command like he is, but it's clear that they all know that that's not true.

So we have Spock pointing out the facts as they are and telling Kirk that he won't be able to captain soon, his logic utterly sound. Then we have McCoy getitng mad and denying it at first but ultimately admitting to Jim that Spock was right while also assuring him that having these negative traits is not bad. Kirk has his mind telling him one thing, but can't get over his feelings about it after what he's seen. He can't ignore the reality as much as he wants to. He has to accept that as repulsed as he is by seeing his raw darkness, he needs it. He has to accept it to be whole. To be Captain James T. Kirk. Otherwise, he is only half of what he is, and he can't live like that.

But what happens when you have the mind and the heart talking, but the soul is unable to balance it?

After we find out that the merging may kill Kirk from the shock, we have Spock and McCoy arguing again over what to do. All while Kirk sits there, listening to both sides and considering every option, but being unable to decide. The screencap above outright has Kirk in the middle, Spock and McCoy to the side like they were his shoulder angel and devil. They couldn't have symbolized it better if they tried.

On the one hand, we have Spock. It's clear to him that it was shock that killed the unicorn dog, unable to comprehend what all had happened to it when split and forcibly merged back. But Kirk IS able to comprehend it and thus will be able to avoid the same fate. Spock himself struggles with his two sides regularly and is able to manage it... well, he thinks he can anyways, but that's not the point. From his experience, he believes that Kirk can survive and regardless, the landing party will die unless they take the risk of merging Kirk and thus confirming that the transporters are safe once more. As is the duty of the captain.

On the other hand, we have McCoy. With no autopsy completed, he can't be for sure what caused the death and as a doctor he's not going to make a conclusion without it. He's utterly against using the teleporters until the autopsy is complete, at least. He's unwilling to risk Kirk's life without the proof. Plus, if they do it and Kirk dies, then they won't be able to beam up the landing party, and thus they'd die from the cold anyway. He needs absolute certainty before he's willing to allow anything. He's a doctor, so of course he's not going to recklessley allow anyone to risk themselves unless it's himself but shush, but he's especially not risking Jim.

That leaves us with Kirk. He can listen to the two sides. He can weigh the options of the two sides. If he doesn't go through the transporter, his stays split and his men die. But if he does, he has no way of being certain that he'll live. But the key to the Triumvirate is that Spock has his side, McCoy has his side, and Kirk either concedes to one or finds a third option. But he can't. Not at this moment. He has no ability to decide. That essential element is gone. He's still unwilling to relinquish command, and thus neither Spock nor McCoy can make the decision. It has to be Kirk.

Ultimately, the good Kirk chooses to go through the transporter, his men's lives coming before his own. The bad Kirk refuses, trying to abandon his men to save himself. The good Kirk isn't afraid of the risk while the bad Kirk fears for his life. The logical half and the emotional half at odds. In the end, the good Kirk convinces his terrified dark side that it has to be done. Thus, they are brought back together and become whole once more. James T Kirk becomes whole once more.

I have no idea where I'm going with this, and I'm probably reading into this WAAAAY too hard. But in short, just as Kirk needs his two own halves to function, Kirk needs Spock and McCoy as well. He needs Spock to be able to rationalize him and keep him and his head in check. He needs McCoy to be able to process his emotions and to embrace what he otherwise would be unwilling to. He needs both to be able to find that middle ground and make the decision, whether it be right or wrong but a decision nonetheless. Without him as a balance, the two halves are separate. Nothing to balance them out and at war with each other, unable to reconcile. Unable to be function. Unable to be whole.

the recurring plight

first handshake

i understand you guys now. like i get it

Give me a fic where Spock doesn’t program the Kobayashi Maru. Instead, he programs an entirely new test: Tarsus IV.

And Kirk? He hates it.

Kirk: Two bros, chillin' in a hot tub! Five feet apart 'coz they're not gay!

Spock:

Spock: You are my bondmate.

Kirk:

Spock: And you are on my lap.

Kirk:

Spock:

Spock: Literally everything you just said was inaccurate.

Hello everyone! I've been working on this fanfic for a long time, and finally here is the first chapter! It's an Ace Spock story, and a pon farr story as well. Below is brief summary/glimpse into the fic. I hope you'll check it out! <3 <3

“Stop it! You’re wrong! You keep acting like this is inevitable, that I’ll just keep hurting you!” Jim’s hand lifted Spock’s chin, brought their gazes in line. “I’m not going to be your tormentor. I don’t care what it takes. I’ll do anything you want, if you’ll only ask.” “You know very well what I must ask, Jim.”

When Spock enters his second pon farr early, Jim agrees to become his bondmate. To survive the flames, they must face conniving Admirals, Vulcan extremists, court martials, as well as the dangers of the blood fever itself. Yet their most difficult obstacle to overcome might be each other. Will Jim and Spock find a way through the perils before them – or will they destroy themselves and their love in the process?

Thinking of you after your last post feeling burnt out hope youre doing ok and finding your centre 🥰

aw anon thank you!! this means a lot to me. i took a week off of tumblr/social media/writing and it helped tremendously. i'm even planning on poking at a spirk prompt someone sent me today and see how that goes :)

I fully believe that if Spock hadn’t bumped into that table in operation-annihilate he wouldn’t have told anyone he’d gone blind