skelly-duck - Tumblr blog

skelly-duck · 1 month

Text

If i thrust my fingers down my throat?

Will it feel as it did when you groped?

you hoped,

I couldnt speak,

with the rope,

the load layed down on my throat

The fear and care you took to

assimilate me

So i poke,

to cope at the scars you made

I caved,

to your will.

If the frothing acid causes a

coughing fit,

Will my tears stain?

The lasting marker of my pain.

And as its burning, theres a

yearning inside,

that wants to be free.

I'm learning, earning

how not to hate me.

Every shaking, waking hour

the fear of having the power.

This curse has stolen my youth,

the truth, is so heartbreaking to see.

Gut-wrenching,

fist clenching,

entrenching belief.

I will not simply be,

an empty vessel,

a cradle, for those who seek to abuse me.

Do not lay down your troubles at my feet.

Do not discard them, impart them,

then rapidly leave.

I cannot save you from yourself whilst you victimise me,

I cannot nurse your wounds whilst you inflict them with glee.

The rising,

the writhing, the geyser

under the skin.

The love you don't have,

so you steal it at whim.

You came, you saw, you desecrated me.

But in your attempt to silence,

you stoked the flames.

The rage of an age,

too young to believe.

Of over rippened innocence, fresh for the plucking.

Theres a hefty fine to pay for those who go apple scrumping.

The blooming,

looming, fight deep inside.

The terrifying will, not to lay down

and die.

To see one more night, one more sunset and sunrise

To bask in the light, my right to survive

The truth is simple,

I shall live, I shall grow

You sowed the seeds of my vengence,

Red bark will still glow.

And though veins show the blood thats been spilt,

They show more tennacity,

more grit than your greed.

I have weathered the storm,

I have sunk, I have swam.

I have fought to take my lifeback into my hands.

No one can chose the arbiter of their fate,

but I can chose to walk the path youve not paved.

I will dance in the dark and laugh through the day.

And althought my past cannot be erased,

I believe there will come a time I can honestly say :

I'm glad I stayed.

#poetry #poems and poetry #poems on tumblr #poem #prose #prose poetry #trauma #mental illness #mental health #recovery #writeblr #my photos #photography

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