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reuinx · 2 years

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What If (Yelena Belova x Reader)

Summary: The night is supposed to be spent with Natasha, your best friend. Nevertheless, fate has other plans for you. She's running late. You're shocked to find Yelena home, soaked to the skin. She doesn't seem to be herself. It's time for a friendly game of Truth or Dare to cheer her up.

Word Count: 3,466

Translations: Krasivo (Pretty), Krasivaya (Beautiful)

The What If. We all have them. They sneak up on you whenever you least expect it. You are rendered powerless by them. They left you feeling more anxious than you ever have before. Whenever this happened, the same person would appear again. Yelena. Yelena Belova has left you with more What Ifs than anyone else. She would be smug if she knew how much time you spent thinking about her.

For as long as you can remember, Natasha has been your best friend. Natasha was closely followed by Yelena wherever she went. Initially, you and Yelena clashed constantly. It was her way or no way. You didn't notice the change between you both. When you first met, you used to roll your eyes at one another but now it had changed to gentle smiles at each other in passing. While Natasha thought you and Yelena were finally getting along, you knew there was much more to it.

It was impossible not to stare whenever she walked into the room. Her smile was contagious, and her gentle laugh was a comforting sound for you now. You didn't hear it that often, which was unfortunate. Despite her openness when it came to sharing her opinions, she was quiet when it came to how she felt about other people. This included you. She was always so closed off. You wished she wasn't.

It was unclear how things stood with Yelena now. The tension between the two of you, however, was always there. Something unspeakable. Continuously building to a boiling point, it was threatening to explode. Whenever you met her in passing, you'd catch how she looked at you, and well, it made you melt. She would often message you on Instagram. Every time she sent you a message, you'd be lying if you said you weren't excited.

There were times when they were the simplest things. She might just be asking about your day. Through the screen, you knew she was sincerely interested in what you had to say. She would send voice messages explaining her day, and you couldn't help but swoon when you heard her voice. You could never admit that to her. Maybe you were overthinking this? It wasn't exactly possible to have a relationship with your best friend's sister.

There was a plan for you to spend the night over at Natasha's. You were supposed to be going to a party, but it changed last minute. It was impossible to say no to her when she asked to get together to study. It wasn't a secret that Yelena planned on attending the party tonight too. She mentioned it several times to you over text.

There was no way you could get it out of your head. What If you had gone? You would have had some alone time with Yelena. Is that what you really wanted? Would you be able to trust yourself? You've made up your mind, stop it. Regardless, you won't be going. Initially, it had been a horrible night. The rain hadn't stopped and the cheap umbrella you carried couldn't keep from collapsing when the wind blew. Every time you promised yourself, you'd buy a new one, you didn't.

It served you well, only managed to dampen you a little bit. Natasha wasn't home yet when you arrived. You had received a message earlier saying she was running late and would get you something to eat on her way. The key was hidden in the plant pot, so you let yourself in. After ascending the stairs and making your way down the hallway to Natasha's room, you heard faint music playing. It stopped you in your tracks, leaving you wondering where it came from. You knew the song. Crimson and Clover. As soon as you heard it, you knew it was coming from Yelena's room. She must have forgot to turn it off.

You approached Yelena's room; you noticed the door was slightly open. You didn't hesitate to enter. The room was being lit by a lamp in the corner, she must have forgot to turn that off too. She must have been in a rush to leave the house. Your eyes met the source of the music. Her vinyl player in the corner of the room, the same one Natasha got her for Christmas. Your eyes were drawn to the spinning vinyl as you made your way over to it. You were about to switch it off when you suddenly heard a noise behind you. It was a quiet gasp.

You were startled, you glanced over your shoulder to the source of the noise. Yelena. It was hard not to notice what she was wearing. In a short red dress with a figure-tight fit, she looked stunning. You both stood on opposite sides of the room in silence, it felt like forever but in reality, only a few seconds had passed. You watched as her chest heaved in, she looked like she was holding her breath. Why? Her green eyes weren't on you for once. They were focused on the ground. She wouldn't even look at you.

Her face looked tense; she was chewing on her bottom lip. What had happened? You decided you were going to break the silence, but she must have had the same idea. You both spoke at the exact same time

"Hi"

"Hi." The second it happened; you heard a quiet laugh release from her lips. In an accidental lift of her eyes, her gaze met yours. The sound of her voice was raspy, as if she was worn out. Her lips parted ever so slightly, and her face instantly relaxed. The blush on her cheeks was instantaneous. Her eye contact with you lasted longer than she would have liked. Even if it was just for a moment, she let down her walls. Upon entering the room, she rolled her eyes at you, biting the corner of her lip as she rubbed her wet hair.

"You don't like my music?"

"Who doesn't like Crimson and Clover? I just didn't think you'd be home."

"Not happy to see me then?"

"No, no! I- didn't mean that. I-"

"No? So you aren't happy to see me?" She interrupted you, raising her eyebrows. You were being teased by her. Of course, you bit despite knowing better. She was the cat, and you were the mouse.

"Stop teasing me!"

"I thought you liked it."

"You're doing it again."

"Doing what?"

"God, I hate you. You're so annoying, I swear" A chuckle escaped your lips as you glanced down at the Vinyl player. A slight adjustment to the volume was made as you leaned up against her dresser. Your mind was torn between leaving and staying. You were too busy lost in thought to have seen Yelena's expression. When you looked up at her, she was frowning at you.

"You don't hate me."

"Maybe I do."

"I know you don't" There was such a sense of seriousness in her voice. You weren't sure whether she was trying to prove it to you or to herself. She did something that was unusual for her. A subtle thing caught your attention. She was fiddling with the fabric of her dress. All the time, she seemed so carefree. What made her anxious? She never was. It seemed to have hit a nerve with her, so you changed the topic.

"How was the party? I just wasn't expecting to see you tonight and you're so wet." The second the words left your mouth. Yelena raised her eyebrow up with you, a dirty smile crossing her lips as her eyes didn't leave you. You felt your body tense up under her gaze. You had stepped right into that one. Every move you made was scrutinized by her as she leaned against the door.

"You're acting like that's a bad thing."

"I was talking about your clothes"

"I wasn't" Yelena released a soft chuckle. You could feel your stomach tighten. There is a flush of red on your cheeks right away. You hated that she had that much control over you. As she approached you, you held your breath as she brushed up against you softly making her way to sit on the window still. Her favourite place to sit was there, especially when it rained. She rested her head against the glass, her eyes drooped as she looked at you. You'd love to know what she was thinking right now.

"You're blushing."

"I'm not."

"Are too"

"Quit it"

"Do you really want me to stop?" She almost said it in a whisper, her eyes slowly tracing your face for a reaction. You shook your head, bringing your attention to something else. Anything else.

"Why did you come home so early?"

"Just felt like it."

"Unlike you."

"I just wasn't feeling it."

"I feel like there's more to that then you're letting me know" As you heard her release a sigh, you murmured under your breath. Looking out the window, she focused her attention on the raindrops. Despite the faint music playing, the sound of the rain beating against the glass was louder.

"I got all dressed up and for what? I mean. Sure. It was a party, and all parties are the same but I just..." A look of regret flashed across her face as she shared that with you. She began twisting a ring on her finger. You sat down beside her on the window still, a gap between you both. She didn't look at you, not once. You could feel it in the silence.

"You just?" You added, you wanted her to talk. You wanted to hear what she had to say.

"Nothing." She shrugged her shoulders at you weakly. The walls you thought were gone, were built sky high.

"How about we play a game?"

"A game?" Yelena lifted her head up where you could finally see her green eyes up close. You could feel yourself beginning to melt.

"I think you need a cheering up and what's more fun than me beating you."

"Oh please. You're on! I win every time."

"You sure about that?"

"Absolutely positive."

"Cocky."

"Pick a game then"

"Any game?"

"Any game."

"Truth or dare. First one to pull out, loses."

"That's easy. I never pull out." Yelena was smug, she always was. You wanted to wipe that look off her face. You wished you could say she was lying but Yelena always won. The only time you ever did was if she let you. It started off extremely reserved for dares. You knew she was building up to making you lose. You both didn't hesitate between the truths and dares. However, Yelena had been asking you too many truths. You noticed. She was enjoying asking you questions that you simply couldn't get out of answering. She was trying to figure you out.

"I dare you to tell me what's your biggest fear?" She questioned. She observed your every movement, she didn't want to miss a thing. You had forgot music was still playing at this stage. You were twirling a loose strand of your hair around your finger, lost in thought.

"You can't do that!"

"Said who?"

"Ugh. I guess falling." You finally managed to say. She slowly titled her head to the side at you, her eyes craving for you to elaborate on your answer.

"Falling?"

"Don't make fun of me."

"No no, I'm not. I'm just curious!"

"I don't know! It sounds stupid now!"

"No! It doesn't. Trust me. It doesn't. You're talking about falling in love, right?"

"Oh god, don't say it like that. That makes it seem so serious. I answered it, we are moving"

"I want you to keep talking"

"Yelena-"

"Please?" Her voice was soft, she was pleading with you to continue.

"I don't know. The whole thing about falling, you know? I just. It's terrifying. You don't know it's happening before it's too late. You're just totally vulnerable and out of control. I hate losing control. There's nothing you can do beside let yourself fall. It's too late to stop it. No matter how much you try to prevent it, it just happens."

"Sometimes people don't break your heart, they'll break your fall."

"That's poetic."

"It's the only thing going for me."

"Oh please. You just need to look in a mirror"

"Is that a compliment?"

"Maybe."

"I'll remember that."

My turn, Belova. Truth or dare?"

"Dare, obviously." You dared her to make a prank call. She was busy trying to keep in character, but you couldn't help but stare at her during it. When she caught sight of your eyes, she began to stumble over her words. You loved how her lips pulled up into a smile, how she threw her head back like a little kid laughing when the call ended. She didn't realize how beautiful she was as she sat there, soaked through her dress and her wet, wavy hair running down her shoulders.

"Well, Krasivo. Truth or dare?"

"I'm going to say dare. You've been going easy on me. I know you have. I thought you would've pulled out all the stops to win."

"Oh? You think I'm going easy on you?"

"Of course, you are."

"Okay then. I dare you to kiss me." She didn't even hesitate. You blinked; you couldn't believe she had just said that. Did she? Maybe you misheard. The way she looked at you said it all. Her green eyes slowly travelled from your eyes, tracing down your face until it met your lips. Her lips began to slowly pull up into a wide smile, she was giving you a toothy grin.

"Checkmate. I win." She whispered. You could feel your stomach beginning to twist and turn. You could feel your throat tighten. She turned her head from you to look out the window, her big smug smile on her face. You hated that. It was a friendly game of Truth or dare. It meant nothing.

"What were you saying about beating me this time-"

"Hey."

"What?" She questioned, turning her head back to look at you. It wasn't expected that you would speak to her. The gap between you two was filled by you moving over to her. Yelena's body tensed up as you were so close to her. The What If was in your head again. What If she was only joking? What If she hated it? Fuck the What If. Just kiss her.

"What are you- "Before she could complete her sentence, your lips touched hers. It happened so quickly. It was all you could manage. If you kept your lips against hers longer, you feared you would not be able to stop. In utter shock, Yelena blinked rapidly while her face turned red. Her gaze was fixed on you.

"I- I... Dare. Just dare me" Yelena uttered, rubbing her cheeks with her knuckles.

"Um.. I dare you to tell me why you came home from the party earlier." The colour began to drain from Yelena's face as you abruptly spoke. Something you'd never seen before filled her eyes, worry. There was a long pause in the silence that followed her. The music could be heard again before she answered.

"I was expecting you to be there." She admitted. Her hand raised up to her forehead, carefully rubbing it as her eyebrows creased.

"Me?"

"I got all dressed up to see you. It sounds so stupid now that I say it out loud because God, how pathetic is that? If Nat could hear me right now. Imagine what she'd say." In order not to hesitate again, she spoke quickly. As soon as she said it, she looked at you. A worried expression on her face, her eyes flickering into yours in search of an answer. Any answer.

"You did all that for me?"

"Of course, I do. Everything I always do is for you. I just wanted you to see me how I see you."

"And how's that?"

"Krasivaya" Under her breath, she whispered. You had never seen this side of her before. Yelena had become accustomed to getting what she wants whenever she wants, the confident one. From the moment she saw you standing in her bedroom, there was a lot of uncertainty around her.

"Beautiful." She translated. It was impossible to stop the smile from forming on your face.

"You're funny."

"Why?"

"You're beautiful, El. You always have been." There was no way you could believe this was real. The thought of telling her all this made you feel sick to your stomach.

"You know I still won Truth or Dare." Taking a moment to look at her hands, she fiddled with her fingers while smiling softly.

"No, you didn't."

"Yes, I did."

"I kissed you. We're even"

"That wasn't a kiss. This is a kiss." With her hand raised, she slowly ran her finger tips over the side of your cheek as she spoke firmly. With such tenderness, she presses the palm of her warm hand against your cheek. To get closer to her, her free hand reached into the neck of your t-shirt and pulled the collar down.

Slowly, she pressed her lips against yours, making your lips burn. She moved her lips in harmony with yours. You adjusted yourself and wrapped your arms loosely around her neck, slowly entangling your fingers in the strands of her blonde hair that you pulled. As soon as you did, you felt her body pressing up against yours in need. She lets out a soft moan, encouraging you to keep pulling.

"I wouldn't do that if I was you."

"Why? What are you going to do about it?"

"I'll show you." You smiled against her lips. Her words said one thing, but her body said another. Dropping her hands from your cheeks, releasing her lips from yours, she still climbed up off the window. After a curious look from you, she slowly bent down in front of you as panic set in. She gave you a look that could almost kill.

Her sudden movement made you squeal as she grabbed you in her arms. As she pushed you up against the cold window, your body jolted as the cold shocked you. As soon as it happened, you pushed straight up against Yelena. As your body struggled between her warm body and the cold window, you knew which you preferred. Her.

"Good girl" A hushed voice echoed her words. She wasn't the one to lean in. It was you. She felt your lips on her instantly as you wrapped your arms tightly around her neck. Your lips were hungrily kissing hers. It wasn't clear where this would go, but God, you didn't want it to end. The clothes she was wearing were still damp. The reason you realized she didn't get out of her wet red dress was because she was didn't want to stop talking to you.

"God, El. I want to be yours." She smiled in response to your whining against her lips. After lifting you off the window, she carried you over to her bed and gently laid you down.

"You are mine" She corrected you. As she climbed on top of you, she tightly wrapped your legs around her waist. You were going to take advantage of this opportunity. Playfully, you flipped her over, resulting in you being on top. As she relaxed beneath you, you watched. You were the focus of her intense gaze. Slowly, you ran your hands along the thin fabric of her dress. You were craving her.

"That's cute." Your eyes met hers with curiosity as she commented.

"What's cute?" You questioned. She flipped you back over without any ease. Her performance was so effortless. You had taken control for a short time, but that was gone now. You were exactly where she wanted you. Your wrists were pushed over your head as she leant in close to you. She was so close you could feel her hot breath against yours.

"That you think you can be on top." Her eyes remained fixed on her as she spoke. Your wrists were released from her hard grip. As you furiously pulled on the fabric of her dress, you knew exactly what you wanted. You wanted to feel her skin against yours. Unbeknownst to you. Yelena was about to remove her dress when the bedroom door was pushed open further. From the door, there was a loud splat sound. Both of you froze. As you pushed up on your elbows, you looked at what caused it.

"What the fuck." After being shocked, Natasha dropped the Chinese she had been carrying, spilling it everywhere. Astonished, she stood in the doorway. Her sister and her best friend.

"Not the noodles." Yelena whined.

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reuinx · 2 years

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Hello, lovely’s! Just wanted to put up a quick post to let you know what’s going on! I’ll be continuing the one-shots for Yelena Belova! Keep your eyes peeled for an update in the next few days.

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Year!

Love, Rein

#yelena belova fanfiction #yelena belova x reader #yelena belova x you #marvel imagine #yelena belova #marvel #mcu #my writing #writing requests open #yelena belova angst #rein #rein writing

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reuinx · 2 years

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I’m honoured I made the list! Thank you so much, lovely! ☺️

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@reuinx

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reuinx · 2 years

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As one of my first friends on here, I couldn’t not send you something.

Freeze! ✧ ─=≡Σ((( つ•̀ω•́)つ You’re under arrest for being so lovely. Copy this message to 10 other blogs that you think are beautiful and deserve it. Keep the game going and make others feel beautiful! 🌾🌙

You’ve always been an absolute gem. I’m honored as always. Thank you so much, lovely! It means a lot to me 💕

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reuinx · 2 years

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reuinx · 3 years

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Grief (Yelena Belova x Reader)

Summary: You are worried about your girlfriend, Yelena. It has been difficult for her to cope after losing her sister. She is overwhelmed by grief. You pay her a visit in the hopes of supporting her through this difficult time. Sometimes even the strongest need help.

Word Count: 2,277

Translations: Dorogoy (Darling), Moya lyubov (My Love)

Every unwary soul is constantly engulfed in the shadow of death. There is no way to escape it. No matter how hard you try, you can't outrun it. Nobody was expecting that call in the middle of July. You could remember the night so vividly. Every weekend you would spend the night at hers after she finished work. You couldn't resist saying yes to her plea to play Monopoly with her. She was one of the most competitive people you knew; she was ruthless to those around her when she wanted to win. Whenever she engaged in any activity with you, she changed her attitude. Whether it was Mini-Golf or even board games, she would always let you win.

Melina and Alexei were busy bickering about trying to decide what they wanted to watch on Netflix. At 10:30 pm, the phone rang. It didn't look like anyone would answer it until Yelena abandoned your Monopoly game to do so. You realized then that getting phone calls that late at night could only mean bad news. If only looks could kill. Her face lost all its colour; she looked ill to the core. Suddenly, her lips parted, and all she could do was scream. The shriek made her inconsolable.

A drunk driver struck Natasha on the highway as she was heading home that night. She had been hit by such force that she had been killed instantly. Death catches up with everyone. Yelena shut down; she didn't want to talk about it with anyone, including you. Part of you was beginning to believe that she did not want to talk about it because it would make it a reality if she did. At Natasha's funeral, Yelena appeared a shell of her former self.

Physically, she was in front of you, but mentally she was gone. The night Natasha died, part of Yelena perished as well. Her eyes now lacked light. A dangerous rate of weight loss and refusal to eat resulted in her health declining. She stopped responding to your calls and texts. You only heard from Melina, who kept you updated on Yelena.

You wanted Yelena to have the space she needed to grieve. However, you were becoming increasingly concerned about her. For the past few days, Yelena hadn't left her room. When Alexei or Melina spoke to her, she did not respond. The feeling of powerlessness was overwhelming. You didn't know whether Yelena would want to talk to you, but it was worth a shot. If Yelena had been in your position, she would never leave your side.

Usually, you were excited to see Yelena when you made your way to her house. This time was different; your stomach was filled with anxiety. It had been two weeks since you had seen Yelena in person, two weeks since the funeral. Despite your best efforts, she denied you were comforting her after the funeral. Belova household was always full of life. However, as soon as Melina let you into the house, the atmosphere had changed entirely from what you initially remember.

"It's so good to see you, dorogoy. El's up in her room as per usual. She's not the best today so take whatever she says with a grain of salt." Melina offered you a comforting smile, but that sadness that shadowed her face was apparent. The silence was eerie. Something was missing, and that was Natasha. Natasha and Yelena would spend their time bickering, or Yelena would insist on playing Just Dance. Alexei would dance around the kitchen while Melina cooked up one of the most delicious dishes you've ever eaten. When Natasha was alive, Alexei would always be home early, but now he is always late. Melina didn't cook anymore and ordered takeout.

Every step up the staircase was harder than the last. It wasn't clear what you would tell her. After debating how you were going to do it, you reached the top of the stairs. While walking down the hallway, you suddenly felt your heart sink. Seeing Natasha's bedroom made your throat go dry. When she wasn't home, the door was permanently shut. Her room door was always left open while she was inside. This gave Yelena the chance to speak with her whenever she wanted to. Even within Natasha's absence, the door was shut closed. The realization dawned on you that Natasha would never have another chance to leave that door open for Yelena.

You wondered had Yelena ventured in yet. Was she brave enough to face the situation? Was the bedroom still exactly how Natasha left it that morning? You pondered all these questions as you stood by Yelena's door. Usually, you would knock, but this time you grabbed the doorknob and forced it open. The thing about Yelena was that she always had a messy room as if that was a surprise to anyone. It was an organized mess, but what you saw next shocked you.

The room was immaculately clean. In some ways, the room resembled a hospital room. The bed looked untouched. The behaviour was unlike Yelena's. After scanning the room for her, your eyes found the blonde sitting up on the window ledge, watching the world go by. While the world outside seemed to be moving, everything inside the house seemed to be at a standstill. She wore a black t-shirt and grey tracksuit bottoms. When you entered the room, she didn't even look at you. It was as if you hadn't even walked through the door. It was uncertain what her reaction would be, so you approached cautiously.

"El.. baby." As you heard a sniffle coming from Yelena's direction, you felt your chest tighten. She quickly rubbed her eyes.

"You...um... shouldn't of come..I mean…you didn't have to come.." Usually, when she's tired, her voice carries that lingering raspy tone.

"Why wouldn't I come?"

"I'm a mess. I'll get it under control, I will...You need to go-" Before your interruption, she was trying to explain. You couldn't let her believe that.

"Why would I go, Yelena?"

"Please. I can't have you see me like this."

"You're pushing me away, El."

"I have to push you away! I can't... I don't know what to say”

"Look at me." She had no energy to communicate with you, so you called out. She didn't move a muscle, refusing to look at you.

"Yelena. Look at me." You insisted as she suddenly turned to face you. Finally, you were able to take a good look at her. Her cheeks no longer held that warm glow that usually crossed between them. There were black bags under her eyes; they almost looked permanent. After losing weight, her face seemed practically sunken in. Her skin beneath the nose was raw. Due to how much she had been crying, her eyes held a red hue. Her chest heaving in and out as if she couldn't breathe. When your gaze met hers, her lips curved into a frown. She looked like she was trying to stop herself from crying again.

"Talk to me, El." Even as you felt your face tighten in discomfort, you managed to say something. Being unable to do anything but watch while someone you love falls apart was difficult. The silence in the room began to dominate.

"I have nothing to say."

"You always have something to say, Yelena."

"This time... this time I don't."

"I don't believe that for a second."

"Believe what you want" Her shoulders shrugged at you, with her response being so cold you could almost freeze. She created a barrier between you two.

"Yelena Belova, I know you. You won't even try to talk and look at me. You're fading away, baby. There's no shame in talking, no shame on talking about how you feel. If this happened to me, you'd be there every step of the way."

"I can't! I can't!" Suddenly, she climbed off the window ledge. While her eyes were fixed on the floor and her head moving from side to side, she stood up tall. While you slowly approached her, she raised her hands to cover her eyes. If you didn't break down the barrier she put up, you would lose her forever.

"Why can't you? You're the strongest person I know-"

"Because you'll hate me! You'll fucking want nothing to do with me! God, I don't even want anything to do with myself!"

"Why would you think that? I don't think I could ever hate you, El. Not ever."

"It was my fault." She suddenly said, dropping her hands from her face as you stared at her with a look you'd never seen on her face before, guilt.

"I-..What was your fault?" In response, you whispered, unable to connect the dots.

"I killed Natasha." These were the only words that came out of her mouth. Your gaze that was usually soft hardened as you froze before her. You tried to gather your thoughts as she looked back into your eyes, tears rolling down her cheek as she began to whimper at her own words that lingered.

"Baby, you had nothing to do with that. It was a drunk driver." Despite your best efforts, you were unable to reassure her.

"I did!"

"No..no you didn't"

"You aren't listening to me." When she started to pull at her hair strands, she sounded indignant. While fumbling with her thumbs, she made her way over to her bed and sat down. As a result, you did not reply to her to give her time to say what she wanted. Your curiosity was piqued by what she was saying. After making your way over to her bed, you sat beside her and waited for her to speak.

"I'm listening now, El. I'm listening."

"I…um. On the night that Natasha.. she.. I texted her on the way home.. What happens if she took her eyes off the road for a second to read it? It's my fault that it happened. Maybe If I didn't text her then she could've dodged the car. Maybe the notification made her look. Maybe it distracted her! I just..-"Her voice was filled with utter dread with every word she spoke. Her ruin had been caused by this. According to her, she was somehow involved in Natasha's death. It wasn't something she thought; it was something she truly believed.

"Hey...hey. Listen to me. What happened to Natasha was a tragedy. You had no control over this, Yelena. You hear me? Nobody did. Not Natasha and not you. Once that drunk driver got into his car, there was nothing nobody could do" Reaching forth; you gently cupped her cheeks with your palms as you spoke firmly. She didn't shrug but allowed you to do so. Although she didn't speak, she shifted into your arms and the comfort of your embrace. Usually, it was she who looked after you, but this time was different. Your presence was what she needed.

"But what if.." While you embraced her tightly, she mumbled into your chest as tears streamed down her face.

"You can't blame yourself over the what if's." You held her closely, making your way underneath the bedsheets with Yelena. Unlike most of the time, she did not take charge. As she slipped under the bed sheets with you, she kept her head tucked into your chest. Grounding herself with your heartbeat.

"Close your eyes for me." You responded in a calm voice, feeling her body tense against yours. As the panic set in, her breathing quickened as she became aware of the events.

"I can't. When I close my eyes, I just see her. I can't sleep. Every-time I fall asleep… I keep thinking of her.. the body.. how the car looked… the phone call.. everything. Everything is on replay. I'm terrified to fall asleep and when I do… I wake up screaming." While grabbing the fabric of your clothing, she explained quietly, making sure you were real.

"That's okay, baby. I'm going to be here. I'll hold you until you stop screaming. I'll stay awake and make sure you're alright until morning breaks. I've got you now. I promise I'll not ever let anything happen to you, I swear" Your voice became softer as you explained. Holding her in your arms, you didn't dare let her go. "She isn't coming back, is she?" There was a hushed tone in her voice like someone would take action if they heard you two. Your lips parted, and you shook your head as you shut your eyes. You knew the truth.

"No, baby. She's not coming back."

"I keep thinking this is all a nightmare that I can't wake up from. I keep waiting for her to come home. How am I going to get through it?"

"We will get through this, together. We're going to take it day by day. I need you to rest for me now." Since you didn't know how much sleep she had gotten lately, you were going to continue to put pressure on her.

"What happens if I don't wake up? What happens if.."

"You will wake up. I have you safe in my arms and I'm not letting go of you."

"It should be me looking after you, not the other way around. It makes me feel weak."

"You're one of the strongest person I've ever had the pleasure of meeting, El. Weak is something I'd never compare you with" After you dipped your head in, you placed a gentle kiss in the center of her forehead.

"Moya lyubov?"

"Mhm?"

"Please… please don't go anywhere. I can't lose anyone else. Especially not you."

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Promise me?"

"I promise."

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reuinx · 3 years

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Does anyone else make up fake scenarios every night when they’re trying to sleep or do i need therapy

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reuinx · 3 years

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reuinx · 3 years

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reuinx · 3 years

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Can I please just kiss you a lot

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reuinx · 3 years

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I don’t do phone calls unless you’re reaaaallllllllyyyyyy special

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reuinx · 3 years

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i want the scenarios in my head to come true

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reuinx · 3 years

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Young And Beautiful (Yelena Belova x Reader)

Summary: In the roaring twenties, your family has little to nothing. You are forced to accept a marriage proposal without Yelena's knowledge. After finding out, she has distanced herself from you completely. It's the annual party at the Belova's estate that brings you face to face. Your own proposal is on the table from Yelena. Are you willing to accept?

Word Count: 2,960

Translations: Prekrasnyy (Lovely), Moya lyubov (My Love), Malishka (Baby)

As a woman, marriage is an economic proposition. When you were a little girl, your mother repeatedly told you, "Marry Rich." An order, not a request. You no longer had time to dream when your reality was becoming true.

"Comfort and luxury are key to living a happy life," they'd say. Marriage is not an act of love, as some claim. You would be forced to marry after the courting was over. You would be your husband's property. Your husband expects you to run the household, raise the children, and acquiesce to his decisions. You no longer had time to dream. Attending decorated parties with rich men and riding in carriages with white steads was the dream of this generation. Your dreams were different from those of other girls your age. Even though it was profoundly wrong, your dreams revolved around spending every waking moment with Yelena Belova. Time waits for nobody.

You wanted to be the one to tell Yelena; you owed that to her. However, your father deprived you of that power. Yelena heard about it from her own father, she had not been in contact since. You had sent her a handwritten letter that was delivered personally to her home a week prior. Despite this, she never responded, which was unusual for her.

Even with your wedding approaching, the only thing on your mind was her. You waited every waking day for a letter from Yelena. However, nothing ever came. As you were beginning to lose hope, your father received a letter. You knew the white and red wax seal from anywhere as it was on a letter from the Belovas to your father. Upon hearing that you were being invited to attend their annual party, your father was thrilled. Your mother reminded you that the Belovas were above your class, but Yelena had always treated you as an equal. Her gaze had never been downcast toward you or your family standing. However, the Belova's lavish parties with extravagant spectacles were the talk of the town.

The invitations you receive every year were a result of your efforts. Over the years, the Belova family appreciated your friendship with their daughter. Her mother had frequently expressed how you were the only thing that could make her smile. They were always glad to see you, which was the main factor for their positive attitude. The estate had everything a girl could want and more, as it was filled with possibilities and luxury. Your parents would never allow you to ride a horse as they didn't consider it "Lady-Like" but also because you couldn't afford one. There was no restriction on what you could do on Belova's estate. However, your favourite thing on the estate was Yelena.

The Belovas sent over a red and white Nash Touring from their estate as a complimentary gift for the night. Since your family didn't own nor could afford a vehicle of their own, the Belova did this every year. Arriving at the estate, the expansive Georgian Colonial mansion welcomed you in the purest shade of white that stood on forty acres of manicured lawn and garden. As a child, you spent every waking moment on the estate with a cheery Yelena by your side. Your most cherished memories.

Your parents slyly commented that they had "money to burn" and the whole charade was "ridiculous." Despite their appreciation for the invitation, you knew their jealousy of a Russian family creating a financial emperor and living the American dream that your parents believed they deserved had bothered them. As you approached their home, you were consistently astounded by how well it still looked like it did when it was built. Both butlers stood at the doors; their coats were dust-free, holding them open wide. There was an influx of jazz playing. You made your way through the doors, taking a sharp inhale as you took in the place that you had secretly called home. Even though the outer shell of the house was white, the inside was a surprise to anyone. It was tastefully furnished and decorated with a bright colour.

Your gaze darts from one well-dressed soul to another. The men wore well-tailored, slim-fit suits that were probably bought new for the occasion. The women wore dresses with low-waisted skirts and slippery hemlines. The make-up they wore was so perfect it almost resembled dolls. The type of clothing one wore a reflection of wealth. You and your family were sheep among wolves, but thanks to your mother, you blended in.

When you began your search for Yelena, you slipped from your parents' sight. You knew the layout of their home like the back of your hand. Your exploration as a child had covered every corner and crevice. You knew where Yelena would be, and if she weren't with you, then she would be in her study. Only she was allowed inside, no one else. No one, not even you. She was the only one who had access to it. Her refusal to let you in had been a mystery to you. When you teased her about it, she would smile and reply, "Wouldn't you like to know, Prekrasnyy?"

As if by memory, your feet led you to the location. As you stood in front of the door, your stomach began to twist. You knocked on the door after you hesitated for only a moment. It opened up, something that had never happened before. Even though the house was flooded by music, it became silent in your mind. Everything around you froze as you made the decision. Would curiosity drive you to go in?

"Yelena?" When you called out, you were met with silence. As you stepped over the threshold of the door, you closed it behind you as you couldn't resist the temptation. You flicked on the light and revealed her secrets amidst the darkness of the room.

The wall of the room was adorned with artwork. They looked like they were done by a professional, not an amateur. Astonished at the gallery you stepped into; your eyes widen. You began to walk around the room, your finger tracing over the table that held all the art supplies that were neatly organized.

One painting depicting what appeared to be a beach with a beautiful woman caught your eye. Your eyes flashed to the signature that read Y.Belova. Yelena Belova. The fact that she has never shown anyone her talent made you disgusted. Hidden behind this door. Hidden from the world.

Your attention was drawn to the woman in the image, and you smiled before suddenly you realized. It wasn't a stranger; it was you in the painting. A lump formed in your throat as you suddenly began to examine every painting. Each and every painting contained you. You were her muse.

You assumed that the last painting you saw was recently done as it was still wet. An unexpected visitor suddenly opened the door, so you turned to see who it was. It was Yelena. As she walked in, she pushed her back against the door as shut it with a thud. At first, she didn't notice you. It was clear that she had been crying, as her eyes were bright red. A bruised reed nose and flushed cheeks characterized her appearance. Realization hit her as she noticed the lights were on before spotting you. With a quick motion, she rubbed her eyes. There was a look of relief on her face. You didn’t know but she had been hoping for your arrival, but when she saw your parents together without you, it broke her heart.

"Why are you crying?" Concern began to overwhelm you as you asked.

"I'm not."

"You are."

"I was just cutting….onions."

"Onions? I don't think you even know how to cut one. I know the staff wouldn't dare let you help in the kitchen."

"How did you get in?" The Belova family's signature tone of strength was no longer present in Yelena's voice. You had never seen her like this before. Her voice was hurt and almost like a whisper. As you watched her scrunch up her face at you, you took a step forward towards her but hesitated.

"Why did you never write back?"

"I asked you a question first, did I not?"

"I came looking for you.. but you weren't here. The door was open.. surprisingly."

"Surprisingly" Her words were laced with sudden coldness as she mimicked you. Even if she looked at you, she wouldn't even acknowledge you.

"You have the nerve to act like a child with me? You never wrote me back, Yelena. I waited. I waited to hear from you-"

"You waited!? How do you think I felt when I heard you were to be married?! You didn't even tell me! How could I write a letter back to you? What would I even say? Please don’t marry him?" As Yelena stomped over to you, she stood inches from your face. Frustration was evident in the tears that flowed from her eyes.

"Don't you think I wanted to tell you! Father didn't give me a choice before he ran his mouth! You knew I would never get a choice within this matter, Yelena! Time was against me! Time was against us! I am not going to remain young and beautiful forever! Don't you see that?! Nobody will want me! I have not been as lucky to be born into a family such as yours! I don't have the Belova name that I can hide behind me!" Your words were spoken with pure passion. The silence was oppressive as you could faintly hear Jazz music with the lack of conversation before she broke it.

"You're wrong."

"What?"

"I said you're wrong."

"About what, Yelena? What part of that didn't you understand-"

"About nobody wanting you. I want you. I'd want you if you were old and grumpy. Don't you see that? I’ve spent years painting the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen! How dare you say nobody will want you or not find you beautiful. I’m not nobody.”

"El, don't. I am begging you," What she was about to say would be unbearable to hear. Yelena's fire, which seemed to be put out, had been reignited.

"You know that I love you. That I have always loved you, moya lyubov. I-"

"Yelena, I asked you not too."

"Why? Let the fear you have fall away. If I could I would give you my name, I’d marry you. I would even deny the name if you asked me too" While her warm breath brushed over your lips, she spoke softly as her hands slowly slid onto your cheeks.

"That's the thing. You can't do anything of that nature, Yelena. You're a woman. You can't denounce your name. You can't marry me. I can't love you, Yelena.”

"You can't love me, but it doesn't mean you don't love me."

"I…I do love you but if they knew Yelena, if anyone knew they'd say that we're sick." As you wept bitterly, your shoulders trembled as this was beginning to feel like your final farewell. She gently caught each tear that fell as her thumbs delicately caressed your face.

"Sick? There's no cure for me. Loving someone does not make you sick. It makes you human.”

"You know what they'd say about us."

"Let them talk!"

"We can't! They could hang us."

"Let them. I'd rather die than watch you marry anyone else."

"Don't say that, El. Why would you say that?"

"It's the truth! Why must I lie? Do you think I could bare the thought of the girl I love with someone else?" You pulled your face out of her hands; you couldn't bear to speak anymore. Your heart had already broken when you accepted that wedding proposal.

"Please." Her pleading voice was enough to make you stop.

“What?” You turned around to gaze at her. She stared directly at you with her big green eyes tracing over your face.

"Please don't marry him." She added. Fiddling with her rings, she twirled them around as she became increasingly anxious. It was a privilege to know Yelena, one of the most selfless people you have ever met. She was well within her rights to be selfish this one time.

"El…"

"Please?" You couldn't answer her. You couldn't lie to the girl you hopelessly loved. You turned your back on her as you made your way over to the door, hearing Yelena quickly follow behind you. She spun you around to face her as she shoved you up against the door.

"God will judge us" It was the only argument you could make. You knew loving Yelena was the only thing you couldn't help. You fell in love with the beautiful blonde with her green eyes. You couldn't bear the thought of being married to anyone that wasn't her. Your heart had already broken when you accepted that wedding proposal. You would never be allowed marry the woman you love.

"Let him judge us. If I'm at the gates of heaven, then I'm going to beg him to let me take you. If he won't then I'd rather be damned then be a minute without you, Malishka. I'd rather live a short life of the truth then a long life with a lie" Her perfect Russian accent accompanied every word she said. It was inevitable. Your arms went around her neck, pulling her head down so that you could press your lips against hers. This was what felt right—being here with her.

She pressed her body up against yours with the material of your dresses, not allowing you both to get as close as you could get. She kissed you back hungrily, her lips moving in perfect sync as you lifted your hands into her hair. You pulled at her tied-up hair as she lifted her hand up rapidly, pulling at her own hair to loosen it for you. She knew how much you liked to pull it. She scooped her arms underneath you, lifting you up. She carried you over to her perfectly organized table; she put you on the edge of the table. Taking one hand off you, she shoved her supplies off the table in one quick movement as it made a loud thud.

"El, be careful!" You released a quiet giggle

“I’m being careful. I thought you didn’t like it when I was gentle?” She groaned against your lips. In one moment, she could make you feel so much. You were under her control.

"Smart ass,"

“You love it.” She commented, dipping her head down from your lips as she shoved you further onto the table. She stood between your legs as you continued to lace your fingers within her hair. She slowly began to trace her lips among your exposed neck; she delicately began to nibble against the thin layer of skin.

"My girl. I need my girl," She whined as she began to pull at the material of your dress in need. She wanted it off; she wanted everything off. She wanted to show you who owned you, who you belonged to. She shifted her attention to your throat, kissing down it slowly. Every kiss she left was an imprint of her on your body. You never wanted to lose that.

"I might just buy you a new dress" As her hands tensed on the fabric of your clothing, she whispered against your throat.

"Don't you dare, my mother will kill you."

"She's going to kill me anyway for fucking her daughter all this time, what do I have to lose?"

Your eyes caught her attention when she lifted her head from your throat. As she slowly leaned in, her nose rubbed against yours as she connected her lips with yours once more. The tension in her body was palpable as she pressed against you. Although you wanted her more than anything, she suddenly turned away from you. Your eyes widened in intrigue as you watched her. When she was up to something, she looked at you the way she did as a child—a mischievous smile. While rubbing your smeared lipstick, you sat up straight.

"What are you thinking?" Your nervous laugh echoed throughout the room. She left you more puzzled than satisfied with the look on her face. You became more worried as the silence lengthened.

"Runaway with me."

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