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ooachilliaoo · 16 days

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Fic: Split (1 / 4)

A new Cullen/Helaine fic!! Uh... apologies in advance. Full series here.

Cullen

As has happened far too many times now, it starts with a war table meeting.

“I have had word from those I sent to infiltrate the Red Templars,” Leliana tells them, her voice grave, when they are all collected around the table, early one morning.

(All being Trevelyan, Leliana, Josephine, Lady Morrigan, Helaine, and himself.)

“And?” Lady Morrigan prompts, when Leliana pauses to draw breath.

It has been months since the mage came to Skyhold, and he still hasn’t managed to get used to her presence. She gets under his skin, and not at all in the same way that Helaine does. (Thank the Maker.) It’s more like the feeling you get when there’s a spider nearby, just out of reach. A crawling sort of feeling. The fact Leliana has told him that Morrigan can – and frequently used to – shapeshift into a spider, only makes the comparison stronger.

Leliana smiles that honey-sweet, sarcasm-dripping smile that she only seems to use around Morrigan. “Patience still isn’t one of your stronger suits, is it?”

Morrigan smiles snidely back, and despite his discomfort, he’s been in enough of these sniping matches to know that, if no one steps in, they could be here all day without learning anything of any actual importance. He glances at Trevelyan, but he’s just regarding the pair of them with distinct curiosity. Unlikely to be helpful. Up to him, then.

“What word, Leliana?” he interrupts, wincing slightly as both their attention turns to him.

Thank the Maker that Helaine is here; strong and silent beside him. He has no doubt that she’s ready to throw a barrier over him if things turn nasty, one of the few reasons that he’s willing to step into such a mess.

“Thank you, Cullen,” Leliana says – a distinct aura of superiority to her tone – before she returns to the notes in her hand. “As we suspected, Corypheus’ army is on the move. They have been given orders to disengage with their current targets and move south to the Arbor Wilds.”

“Seeking more Elven ruins?” Josephine asks.

“One in particular. The Temple of Mythal. Though what he hopes to find there eludes us.”

Trevelyan frowns. “Then should we have invited Solas to this discussion?”

“He does a quite singular knowledge of such things,” Josephine adds.

But Leliana shakes her head. “It is not so much the significance of the temple that matters, but that it would appear they want it. And that they are already heading in its direction.”

“That’s not far from the Emerald Graves,” Trevelyan points out, spanning the space between with his hand. “Pity. If you’d received the information a few days ago, we could have diverted, swung by on our way back.”

“Bad timing,” Leliana agrees, one of those enigmatic smiles twisting her lips. “But it would appear that this is an invasion, not an infiltration. I would not have risked sending you and your party to intercept.”

“You think they’re preparing to make a stand there?” Cullen asks, picking up and toying with one of the Forces markers.

“It seems the most logical explanation, no?”

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#cullen rutherford #commander helaine #cullen x helaine #dragon age inquisition #fic rec #adore this rarepair #OMG HOW IS IT STILL SOMEHOW A SLOW BURN AFTER THEYVE... well YOU know #beatiful writing #this was written by my best friends and is awesome

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ooachilliaoo · 18 days

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Target Practice

She was deeply suspicious of his offer.

A quiet date on the strip sounded nice in theory but so soon after her Cerberus clone had tried to kill her? No, he had another motivation. Or, if not another motivation entirely, she was at least reasonably certain that they wouldn’t get all the way through the evening without him raising the subject. And wanting to… talk about it. She supposed that discovering she had an evil clone was a hell of thing, but mostly it kinda paled in comparison to a race of sentient machines wiping out all organic life.

That, and she’d rather just not think about it at all.

“If you’ve brought me out here to talk about my feelings, Alenko, you and I are going to have problems,” she said as she spotted him, leaning casually against the rail in a way that probably shouldn’t be as sexy as it was.

The half-smile, half-smirk he gave her in response was somehow just as devastating.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he said, spreading his arms in a gesture that was just a little too innocent.

She let her raised eyebrow and accompanying smirk speak to her scepticism.

He laughed and wrapped his fingers around hers in a way that she would never again take for granted. “Come on, this way.”

Willing to suspend her disbelief for a moment – a decision that was in no way impacted by his hand on hers – she let him lead her to the Armax Arsenal Arena. Turning away from the main arena, he led her to the training rooms that lay alongside.

Still grinning – though not telling her anything – he handed her a pistol (though not her pistol, she noted) and waited until they were stood in the centre of the room before holding up the tiny silver ball.

“You remember targets, right?” he said. “Fifty creds says I can take your fine ass.”

Now, she grinned too. Now, she could relax.

Although damn, she hadn’t done targets since basic.

She primed her pistol. “Bring it on, Alenko.”

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#Mass Effect #Commander Shepard #FemShep #Shenko #Kaidan Alenko #kaidan alenko/female shepard #My Thanix Canon #Just a little something for Shepards Birthday #Hope you all enjoy

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ooachilliaoo · 18 days

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Fic: Vyrnnus (1 / 1)

A Shenko fic for Shepard's -130th birthday! Part of my soulmate AU series here.

Her nightly round has become almost indispensable. She can’t sleep without talking to at least most of her crew. She appreciates hearing their opinions on the missions and the other crewmates, likes listening to their stories, needs to know how they’re coping with the shit that happens day after day on this crazy expedition.

And if anyone wonders why she has a habit of finishing with Kaidan, it’s only because his console is so conveniently beside her bedroom door, okay?

She’s always been good at reading people. Growing up with a revolving door of friends and acquaintances tends to be advantageous for that. She’s good at body language, seeing things that people miss.

Usually Kaidan is tricky to read, even for her. He’s got such self-control, it amazes her. But tonight he is practically screaming.

He’s standing at the console as normal, but there’s a certain set to his shoulders, a certain tension in his jaw, a certain glazed look to his usually expressive eyes that might not be apparent to anyone else, but she can’t deny that it makes her nervous.

“Talk to me, Kaidan.”

He looks over at her, eyes widening in a touch of surprise, like he hasn’t heard her approach. Unusual. He’s normally so hyperaware of his surroundings. Especially when it comes to her.

“You’ve got a little black raincloud sitting over your head.”

He smiles, but it looks a touch forced. “I’ll try to keep the deck dry.”

“What’s wrong?”

His hand finds his hip before she’s even finished. She must have given him a weird look because he drops it almost as quickly.

“I’m sorry. The tension’s bringing some things to the surface I usually prefer to bury.”

She knows that feeling.

“Such as?”

“Seems like every other race in the galaxy is wrapped up in their own problems. They don’t want to see what’s happening. What’s coming.”

“Wanting to believe everything will be fine?” She leans against the side of the console, trying to project an air of casual nonchalance, as if that would help matters. “Sounds like human nature to me.”

He still seems tense. “Yeah. I guess some things carry across species well enough. I should remember that after what happened with Vyrnnus.”

Who?

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#commander shepard #kaidan alenko #shenko #mass effect #enjoy!#fic rec #soulmate au #commander shepard x kaidan alenko #happy birthday shepard!#such a beautiful version of this conversation #honestly stellar writing #this was written by my best friend and is amazing

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ooachilliaoo · 24 days

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In All But Name - Amaranthine

He shouldn’t be here. He really, really shouldn’t. If Eamon ever found out that he’d slunk off alone without his guards he’d… well, killing him would be somewhat counterproductive to Eamon’s ambitions, but he would certainly lecture him for a good few hours and probably insist on even more guards to follow him around even more closely.

He definitely didn’t want that, but the potential reward was absolutely worth the risk.

At least, it was in his opinion. Maybe in the mind of a rational man, it wouldn’t be, but then, where Elissa was concerned, he didn’t typically consider himself to be especially rational.

It hadn’t been a plan so much as an instinct.

Maybe a plan would have helped.

They’d been travelling along the North Road on the way to Highever.

Despite the fact that most of the Landsmeet had been at his coronation – and that he’d had extensive audiences with virtually all of them – Eamon had informed him that he would still be expected to tour the country once things had died down, in order to visit some of the more prestigious nobles.

It had taken barely three weeks of him being stuck in the castle to wholeheartedly agree with the idea.

He’d chosen Highever as the first visit for several reasons.

Firstly – as he’d told Eamon – with the absence of the Teyrn of Gwaren, Fergus Cousland was now the second highest noble in the realm (save for himself) and therefore it only made sense to start the visits there.

Secondly – as he’d told Tegan – he genuinely liked Fergus. The man was perhaps a little more sombre than the picture Elissa had painted of him before the tragedy, but he was always ready with a witty retort and a laugh, even if it didn’t quite reach his eyes. Maybe it was foolish, but Alistair wanted to know him better.

And finally, there was the reason he’d told no-one.

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Read the full series here

#dragon age origins #alistair dragon age #alistair theirin #king alistair #alistair x cousland #alistair x fem warden #alistair x female cousland #in all but name #Look i just wanted to use fairytale tropes #and this was the most semi-logical way to get there #really I just wanted him climbing her tower #don't judge me #hope you enjoy!

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ooachilliaoo · 1 month

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Fic: Diversion (4 / 4)

The last chapter of my 4-way crossover fic! My Brennan/Cassandra series is here and my Cullen/Helaine series is here.

Helaine

She lies awake for hours.

Not an entirely unusual state of affairs, but a distinctly inconvenient one, given that Cullen is lying, peacefully asleep, beside her. But no matter how long she waits, patiently, willing her mind to still and her body to rest, she remains stubbornly awake. Thoughts swirling.

At least her view is interesting.

The stars are shining down through the puit de lumière, a sliver of moonlight visible too if she tilts her head in just the right way. She draws imaginary lines between the dots of light. No specific constellation is in view, but that has never stopped her before. Something to try and occupy her brain.

Though she would not have considered this as a solution to his preference for an open ceiling, she cannot help but be glad that Vivienne had thought of it. Had arranged the installation of it. Even if she had been unbearable about the matter afterward, naturally. Comments about seeing stars in other ways…

Beside her, Cullen lets out a soft snore, and she tears her eyes away from the stars, looking toward him.

Another interesting view.

He is soft in sleep, the lines so often deep on his forehead now smoothed out. His curls escape from the last, worn-away traces of his pomade. She longs to reach out and tangle her fingers in them, but she restrains herself. He deserves his hard-won sleep.

Sleep that continues to elude her entirely.

After a little while longer, she admits a rare defeat.

With utmost stealth, she slips from the bed, dressing in careful silence. This is usually the point at which he realises that she is gone. Waking abruptly and catching her. Tonight, however, he remains sleeping. Even as she takes her coat from the armour stand. Even as she retrieves her weapons. Even as she opens the trapdoor…

She leaves him there.

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#dragon age inquisition #fanfic #cassandra pentaghast #inquisitor trevelyan #cassandra x inquisitor #cullen rutherford #commander helaine #cullen x helaine #I adore these pairings and this seriess #its like Avengers Assemble having them all together!#Helaine is SO SWEET #but also so UNCOMMUNITIVE #im BEGGING you hunni just TALK #next fic in 2 weeks!#this was written by my best friend and is amazing #enjoy!#fic rec

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ooachilliaoo · 1 month

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The Rose

He was thumbing the flower again.

Not his intention, but his thoughts had been drifting while at camp, and before he’d even really thought about it, he’d found his fingers gliding over the delicate petals. Of course, there were no prizes for guessing what – or rather, who - his thoughts had drifted to in that moment.

(In most moments, really.)

He probably shouldn’t be thinking about her. Certainly not as much as he did. He should be thinking about the blight, or how they were going to beat Loghain, or Eamon. Yet, somehow, in those quiet evenings at camp, he found himself idly thumbing a rose that he’d picked on an impulse that he still didn’t fully understand, and thinking about her.

She perplexed him.

He had been so worried about telling her who he really was. Dreading each step that had brought them closer to Redcliffe. Knowing that once they arrived, he would have to tell her, and that the longer he waited, the worse it would be. Yet, he’d been utterly unable to tell her before he’d absolutely had to.

It was strange. Not once had he hesitated to share anything else with her. But that… that had sat in his heart like a lead weight, growing heavier with every step.

He just… hadn’t wanted anything to change. Hadn’t wanted her to treat him differently because of it.

People had always treated him differently because of it, and she was a noble. Granted, she was a noble unlike any other he had met, but she was still a noble. He didn’t think that he could stand it if she suddenly started deferring to him just because that’s what she’d been raised to do. The thought alone was far too horrible to contemplate.

But – when he finally had told her – she hadn’t done that at all. In fact, she’d joked with him. The way they always did. And while, yes, there had been something in her eyes that might have been hurt, and, yes, she had, quietly and factually, pointed out that with Cailan dead, he was technically the last of the royal line – a fact that he hadn’t even considered before that moment – but… she hadn’t changed how she treated him one bit. Not then and not now.

Neither had she pushed him.

She could have. It would have been easy for her to use their friendship to push him towards the throne, and then use him to exact revenge on the bastard who had murdered her entire family. He wasn’t even sure that he’d blame her for it if she did. But she hadn’t, and he knew she wouldn’t.

She wasn’t like that.

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#dragon age origins #alistair theirin #alistair x cousland #alistair dragon age #alistair x warden #alistair x fem warden #I mean it's the Rose #Who DOESN'T love the Rose scene?#hope you all enjoy my little take on it

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ooachilliaoo · 1 month

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Fic: Diversion (3 / 4)

Another chapter of my 4-way crossover fic! My Brennan/Cassandra series is here and my Cullen/Helaine series is here.

Brennan

He regrets not working harder to avoid their Orlesian liaison the moment that Cassandra’s face hardens at Morrigan’s victorious expression. But it’s far too late by then.

She leads him out to the garden, which would be fine, except that she then carries on into the little chamber that she had commandeered for her magic mirror. No, she called it… her Eluvian. He hasn’t forgotten. That day – when she had led him through it into the Crossroads, that strange place between worlds that had felt far too much like the Fade – has already appeared in his nightmares far too many times.

“Er… I would prefer not to-“ he starts, when she closes the door behind them, but she interrupts him with a wave of her hand.

“That is not why I wished to speak to you.”

He can’t help his breath of relief. “Oh, all right then. Because I would have… Anyway. Is there a problem? Something you need? Is Kieran well? Or is it one of the others? Has something happened while we were away? I know we need to arrange some training sessions. Perhaps at the end of the week? I need to talk to Commander Helaine first. But I was working on the mental shielding you showed me while we were in the Emerald Graves, and…”

She frowns at him, and he forces himself to fall silent.

“I hear that you have been soliciting stories of the Fifth Blight.”

Another breath of relief, though her statement does fill him with a certain amount of confusion even so. He’d assumed, by the earliness of her first message, and the haste of her second, that her enquiry was something… time-sensitive. Something that simply couldn’t wait until the following day, when he would be back to his usual timetable of training sessions and war council meetings and audiences with their ever-increasing number of guests.

But he had thought about asking her for those stories, hadn’t he? The morning of the judgement on Blackwall. No, Rainier. Or, no… he seems to want to be called Blackwall, still, Brennan remembers. Some kind of honouring thing? Well, whatever he wants to be called. But then there had been the judgement, and the little holiday that he’d declared after it, and then they’d been preparing for the Emerald Graves, and actually going to the Emerald Graves, and he’d… forgotten.

“I… Well, yes. I’d love to… Sorry – who told you? Not… not that I wouldn’t value hearing your recollections, obviously, it’s just… Leliana mostly told me her stories months and months ago, and I… I never got the chance to ask King Alistair, and-“

Another glare.

“Sorry.”

“It matters little where I learned such information.”

“I suppose not. Is… is that what you wanted to talk to me about?”

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#dragon age inquisition #fic rec #cassandra pentaghast #inquisitor trevelyan #cassandra x inquisitor #cullen rutherford #commander helaine #cullen x helaine #also mention of my FAVES!#I love how nerdy Brennan if over the 5th blight!#i also love Morrigan hiding how much she cares #but OOF that bit about Kirens father OUCH #amazing fic #this was writtern by my best friend and is awesome

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ooachilliaoo · 2 months

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Fic: Diversion (2 / 4)

Another chapter of my 4-way crossover fic! My Brennan/Cassandra series is here and my Cullen/Helaine series is here.

Cullen

His day starts off badly.

Not as bad as it could have started, admittedly. He wakes up, which is usually a positive thing – he has had far more than his own share of totally sleepless nights, and he’s not dead, which is always a possibility – but he also wakes up alone.

Again, not an unusual occurrence, but given that he had gone to sleep with Helaine beside him, this means that he can’t call it a good morning.

He looks around the room for a little while, searching for a note, but finds nothing. Nothing on his desk, either, when he finally descends the ladder to check. It’s not the first time she’s slipped out of bed long before dawn, but it’s the first time that he hasn’t managed to wake up at the movement. Either he was particularly tired last night, or she’s somehow become even sneakier.

(Which is hardly fair, given how stealthy she was to begin with.)

Add to that then that it’s a split training day, and Knight-Lieutenant Lysette catches him on his way to the lower field – so he doesn’t get a chance to even try and check in with her before training – and it’s only natural that he conducts a rather… harder drill session than usual.

On his way out of the training field, some hours later, he is again diverted from his mission, this time by Knight-Captain Briony.

“Yes?” he asks, trying his best not to sound as frustrated as he feels. It isn’t her fault that he’s in a bad mood. And nor can he really explain why he is, given that he still hasn’t managed to have that conversation with her about them telling their subordinates. “Is something wrong?”

She holds herself up a little straighter, and his heart sinks. It generally means a difficult conversation is in store for him.

“Apologies, ser,” she starts, confirming his suspicions. “Bad news from Emprise. Baron Desjardins is requesting that we reassign Knight-Lieutenant Mattrin. Not a good… fit, apparently.”

“Andraste preserve me!” The exclamation slips out before he can stop it, and Briony winces sympathetically. “He’s only been there, what… a week? Two? What can he possibly have done to antagonise Desjardins already?”

Briony shrugs. “Note didn’t say. Just requested we move him.”

He mentally runs through his list of possible postings, coming up mostly empty. If only there hadn’t been that whole debacle with Agata and Lysette… He’s loath to exile the man for a clearly broken heart, no matter how stupid the cause, but they are in the middle of a war, and he had been given ample warning before being deployed to Emprise.

“Harding’s in Skyhold at the moment, isn’t she?” he asks.

Briony nods. “Saw her yesterday, ser.”

“Go and ask her if she has any scouts deploying to the Hissing Wastes any time soon. And if so, if she minds having a soldier tag along.”

Briony’s eyebrows quirk, a clear but silent question, and he sighs.

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#dragon age inquisition #cassandra pentaghast #inquisitor trevelyan #cassandra x inquisitor #cullen rutherford #commander helaine #cullen x helaine #fic rec #its like Avengers Assemble only a MILLION TIMES better!#its so nice to see some friendship time too #also the sparring match here? stunning #this was writtern by my best friend and is awesome

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ooachilliaoo · 2 months

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I just found this and as someone whose main is a queen Cousland, let me tell you I am sobbing

#dragon age #dragon age origins #alistair theirin #this is so gorgeous!#utterly amazing

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ooachilliaoo · 2 months

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I See A Trap

“Careful!” he said, his voice strained, an edge of panic in it. “Careful, careful, careful.”

She glared up at him from her position, kneeling on the ground, and blew a stray curl out of her face with an annoyed breath.

“I’m being careful,” she told him, trying her best to keep a leash on her temper. “You need to stop squirming.”

“I’m not squirming.”

She didn’t deign to answer that. Just as, so far, she had refrained from pointing out that she had called out to them all – very clearly, before the fight had even started – that there were traps littering the ground.

And then the stupid fool had put his foot directly in one.

Before the darkspawn were even upon them.

She was reliably informed that usually darkspawn weren’t smart enough to set traps, but the presence of the archdemon had changed that. Recently, their journey across Ferelden had been interrupted by pockets of darkspawn setting surprisingly clever ambushes on a fairly regular basis.

It wasn’t a problem per se. Thanks to the taint, both she and Alistair were always able to detect the darkspawn and warn the others in plenty of time. Plus, they were never in high enough numbers to pose a real threat.

But it did mean that even if she hadn’t called out about the traps, he should have known to be careful about where he was putting his damn feet.

At least Morrigan wasn’t here. No doubt her comments on his clumsiness and lack of awareness would only serve to further irritate him, and then he would be twisting to spit back at her, and she’d have an even more difficult time getting him free.

Thankfully, the trap in question was only a standard leg trap. If it hadn’t been triggered, it would have taken her less than a second to disarm it. If. But since he had triggered it, she was now faced with the problem of disarming it when, firstly, she couldn’t really reach the mechanism, and secondly, the teeth of the thing were embedded in his boot.

She didn’t think said teeth had gotten far enough through the metal and leather to make him bleed. But, if she made a wrong move, it soon could.

“Stop. Squirming,” she growled through gritted teeth.

“I’m sorry,” he apologised, sounding so genuinely contrite that she paused in her efforts to clear the trap of the leaves and mud that had been used to disguise it and glanced up at him. “Really genuinely. I am. I should have been more careful.”

“It’s all right,” she said, returning to her work. It wasn’t all right, of course, but one of the most unfair things about her prince was the way you just couldn’t stay mad at him. She couldn’t, at the very least.

“Am I going to lose my foot?”

She snorted a laugh and very nearly triggered whatever part of the mechanism she had uncovered.

“Not if you stay still,” she reminded him. “And quiet.”

“Sorry! I’m just… nervous.”

“Well, try not to be.”

“It’s not that easy,” he whined. “You may not have noticed, but there’s not much to look at around here. I need distracting from my possible amputation.”

“How about you count the number of Elfroot plants around?”

“That’s boring. Can’t you talk or something? Talking to you is a much better distraction.”

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#alistair theirin #dragon age origins #dragon age #alistair x cousland #dragon age alistair #alistair x fem warden #Alistair getting stuck in traps IS the DAO experience #seriously #so many times #Hope you all enjoy!

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ooachilliaoo · 2 months

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Fic: Diversion (1 / 4)

Something a little different this week! My first four-POV fic - 1 chapter each from Cassandra, Cullen, Brennan and Helaine!! I hope you enjoy it. My Brennan/Cassandra series is here and my Cullen/Helaine series is here.

Chapter One – Cassandra

The day after the Inquisitor’s party returns from a journey is supposed to be one of rest. An unofficial rule, perhaps, but one that she had always tried to enforce, even in the early days back at Haven. No matter how pressing their situation had been, Brennan needed a little time to recover from the travelling and fighting he had endured on the road. A little time to relax and talk with his colleagues outside of meetings and training sessions.

(And, recently, a little time to spend alone with her…)

But that’s only part of the reason that she’s put out when the runner comes – far too early – the morning after they return from the Emerald Graves.

She’s drifting, barely conscious, when she hears the footsteps on the stairs and a knock at the door, and she foolishly thinks that Brennan has arranged breakfast for them. Or Leliana, perhaps? She had seemed more than usually happy to see them all back the previous afternoon.

“Come in!” she calls, forcing herself to sit up. She looks for her shirt, and then sees it tossed over the sofa on the other side of the room. Rather than give another maid an eyeful, she just pulls the sheets up.

Beside her, Brennan makes a sleepy complaining noise, wrapping his arm around her waist, and trying to pull her back under the covers.

“No, no, no, no,” he mutters. “No training today.”

“I’m not going to training,” she assures him comfortingly, as the footsteps ascend the steps up from his door and a head appears above the balustrade.

Not a maid. And no breakfast. Just a runner. With a message.

He holds it uncertainly for a few moments, and then gestures with it toward Brennan. Who has gone back to sleep, because of course he has.

“Is it urgent?” she asks, hoping that the answer is no, but given the time of day, expecting the answer is yes.

“I… I don’t know, my lady,” the boy says.

“If they did not tell you as much, that means it is not,” she tells him, trying to sound gentle and – by the increasingly nervous expression on his face – not entirely succeeding. “Leave it on the table and I’ll see the Inquisitor gets it when he’s more… conscious.”

Without another word, the boy drops the note on the small table beside the sofa and scarpers.

When the door shuts again, she considers ignoring the note. Just sinking back into Brennan’s sleep-warm arms and trying to drift off again. But she knows the mystery of what the note contains – and, more to the point, who sent it this early – will only eat at her until she reads it. Carefully, she gets up, crossing the room and picking up the slip of paper.

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#dragon age inquisition #cassandra pentaghast #inquisitor trevelyan #cassandra x inquisitor #cullen rutherford #commander helaine #cullen x helaine #fic rec #the pairings collide and OMG ITS FANTASTIC #im living for the friendships here #i hope they double date!#this was writtern by my best friend and is awesome

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ooachilliaoo · 3 months

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In All But Name - Loss

It felt like having an arm cut off. Or like there was a gaping hole in the world. An awful absence that pervaded her every move and thought. The space where he should be.

She wondered if they all felt it, or if it was particular to her.

Would it always be like this?

Or would it get easier over time?

She hoped for the latter, but maybe the price for all the happy moments they’d had while the land suffered under the blight was to live with this awful emptiness forevermore.

They should have been happy. She should have been happy. They’d done the impossible. United the kingdom under one strong ruler and defeated the blight. They deserved a reward, not a punishment.

Except that ruler was him. And two Grey Wardens couldn’t have children. So he couldn’t marry her. Couldn’t make her queen.

She’d tried to think of an alternative solution, but – like the problem of who should rule the kingdom in the first place – she hadn’t, in the end, been able to find anything other than the obvious.

So, she’d left.

Ceded her place in his arms on the floor of that beautiful ballroom to Lady Lyra and… left.

The only indication that she’d been able to give him of her intentions was the briefest shake of her head. Maker only knew how he’d react when he realised what the gesture meant.

But he’d be okay. They’d both be okay.

He, with his gentle heart and sharp mind, would lead Ferelden into a new, prosperous age. His past would ensure that the poor and hungry wouldn’t be left behind or forgotten, while his optimism dreamed up the image of a brighter, fairer future for him to work towards.

And she – her two previous lives left in ruin behind her – would walk into her next life. Older, stronger, and prepared to dedicate her life to the Order that had, for one shining year, brought her such joy. She knew how to run an Arling, and how to train an order of warriors, and she would make sure that his kingdom remained protected.

She’d watch his back, instead of him watching hers.

And they’d both be okay.

She’d seen it all on that balcony, the one that she’d fled to after leaving his arms simply because it was the nearest exit and she hadn’t wanted anyone to see just how much she hurt. The night air had been a balm to her battered heart. As long as she ignored the faint remnants of the music on the edge of her hearing – as long as she didn’t picture what might or might not have been happening on the dance floor with a man she still considered hers – she thought that she might have been able to regain control of herself.

But her thoughts had been racing and she’d worried that if she went back into that ballroom – even just to cross it in order to leave – he’d find her and convince her to stay. Or worse, she’d see him dancing with someone else, and actually enjoying himself.

She’d suffered a lot in the past year, seen any number of horrors…

But she didn’t think she could have survived seeing that.

And so, the newly minted Warden Commander of Ferelden, Arlessa of Amaranthine, had found herself climbing over the balcony, down the castle wall and escaping into the gardens.

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Read the full series here

#dragon age origins #alistair theirin #dragon age #alistair x cousland #Alistair x FemWarden #In All But Name #Sorry for the sads #But you know it's that good angst maybe?#hope you all enjoy #y'all are the BEST

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ooachilliaoo · 3 months

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Fic: Tower (1 / 1)

A new Cullen/Helaine oneshot! Full series here.

Cullen

He is so deep in conversation with Helaine as they walk across the bridge and through the inner portcullis, that he doesn’t even see the man leaning against the wall. Nor does he hear the man trying to get his attention.

(Though, to be fair, neither does Helaine.)

“Do you think it would help to split them up?” he continues, oblivious, crossing the lower courtyard toward the main steps.

“Doubtful,” Helaine replies, similarly ignorant. “But if they work so well together, they may be able to be transferred to one of Leliana’s special teams.”

“Make them her problem,” he agrees, unable to keep from smiling. “I’ll talk it over with Briony at our meeting. But I think it’s a good- ouch!”

He is stopped in his tracks by something rebounding off the back of his head. Whirling around, he tries to catch the culprit, a rebuke on the tip of his tongue. Sera, he assumes, or one of the younger inhabitants of the fortress. Some silly game.

But all he sees is Berinole, his hand up in unflinching acknowledgement.

“You-“ Cullen starts, rubbing the back of his head, but the builder interrupts.

“Wasn’t gonna chase you all over Skyhold.”

“So, you thought the answer was to throw… What did you throw at me?” He checks his fingers for mud or something worse, but nothing is there. Just… ah. A pinecone at his feet. “Lovely. Did you need me?”

“No, I was just throwing things at you for fun,” he says, deadpan.

Helaine lets out the tiniest huff of a laugh, and he can’t help rolling his eyes.

“Let me rephrase. Good day, Berinole. What do you need?”

The builder shrugs. “Just thought you might want to know your tower was done. If you want to inspect it, sign it off, then you can move back in.”

He suddenly has a pang of guilt for being so short with the man. “Ah. My apologies. I… I wasn’t expecting it to be done so soon. You said three weeks, at least.”

“The incident was three weeks and two days ago,” Helaine notes quietly.

It was? Maker, he’s losing track.

“I meant, three to four weeks, you said,” he covers. Badly. Helaine gives him a sidelong frown. “Well, shall we go and take a look? I shouldn’t waste any more of your time.”

Berinole heaves a weary sigh and then turns toward the staircase up to the battlements. He begins to follow, but Helaine clears her throat.

“I will return to the Mage Tower.”

He stops, turning toward her. “Oh… I assumed… You don’t want to see?”

“I would be intruding.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“It is your office, I-”

“It would be good to have a second opinion-”

“Still, I-“

“If you have more important things to attend to, of course, I-“

“I don’t care who’s coming,” Berinole interrupts, already partway up the stairs, his voice cutting through their debate. “So long as someone comes and signs off the work order so I can get back to actually doing my job!”

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#cullen rutherford #commander helaine #dragon age inquisition #fic rec #i love this redesign of his tower #and their dynamic #so good #highly recommend #this was writtern by my best friend and is awesome

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ooachilliaoo · 3 months

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Fanfic: These Fleeting Nights (1/9)

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V lay on her back, mind flowing like a waterfall, cascading thoughts of the last year through the synaptic pathways of her mind. Sleep was a rare commodity of late, and the primary factor this early morning was the lack of a certain terrorist sharing her mind. Johnny Silverhand. It’d been a few weeks since her jaunt inside Mikoshi and she’d not quite come to terms with what happened or with the fact that she was now alone in her head. She’d gotten used to it, and with him gone... it was too quiet.

“Johnny?”

There was nothing. No reply. Just silence, an emptiness. A tear slipped down V’s cheek. She missed him. Despite everything, she missed the arsehole.

She lay on her sleeping bag, pitch dark and quiet like nothing she’d heard; she hated it. Panam promised she’d get used to it soon, but it was full-on! Gone were the sirens, the shouts, the songs. The constant dull drone of traffic and tech buzzin’ relentlessly. Now, she could hear… the wind. An untimely gust here, the flap of a loose tarp here. The odd cough from one of her new family members, the Aldecaldos.

Her eyes were wide open, staring blankly upwards into the darkness, gradually adjusting to the low light. They felt heavy and yet stuck, forced open by some invisible force, paralysed in place. She felt that if she were to close them, it would cause physical pain. Despite herself, she blinked, and sighed in relief as the lids refreshed her eyes, pain-free tears moistening her corneas. She drew in a deep breath and listened to the sounds around her and heard the sweet and gentle purr of Judy sleeping beside her, and Nibbles curled up on Judy’s discarded dungarees; she couldn’t decide who was loudest between the two of them.

It was nice having Nibbles with them; a small hairless stray Cat V had befriended in her Megatower apartment complex. Panam was not best pleased with V when she rocked up with her carry case under her arm, something she needed to buy new, along with a rucksack with an adorable little cat pouch allowing for travel with your kitty companion. She got a little carried away in the shop. Nibbles was enjoying being out of the city instead of being cooped up in that apartment on her own. She thought... she was difficult to read. She was definitely more vocal and was a lot clingier with her. Judy was still warming up to Nibbles, convinced that she had an ‘agenda.’ She tried to blink, to reset her brain, move onto something else and stop her brain from processing.

She heard crickets. The high chirping relentless sound of crickets. It was soothing, sort of. Rhythmic, constant; reminiscent of the incessant hiss of technology, the sound of something, somewhere, drawing power from the grid. But it was such a stark contrast to the hustle and bustle of Night City, and she still wasn’t used to it; it was unsettling.

That wasn’t to say that she missed Night City, fuck no! She loved the distance, glad to see the back of it. But like an earworm of some shit-yet-catchy gang-bangers remix, she couldn’t seem to be rid of it. It plagued her mind most days- racing through the events that led them here; Kompeki Plaza, the Relic, Evelyn Parker, the Voodoo boys, Arasaka, downing a Kang Tao AV for Hellman, Dogtown and Songbird, that damned Cynosure lab.

She sat up, defeated at yet another failed night’s sleep. As quietly as she could, she slipped on her clothes and tip-toed to the tent flap. Nibble’s head shot up at the slight disturbance and frowned at her as if to say ’You dare wake me from my slumber, Human!’

She raised an eyebrow at her, “Chill, Nibbles!” she whispered as quietly as she could, peeking back at Judy to see if she’d stirred. She lay on her back, arm draped over her forehead, her mouth slightly open, drooling on the pillow. ‘So pretty’ she thought, stifling a giggle. She turned back to Nibbles, who had settled back down.

V slipped out of the tent into the gloom of camp. It’d been two days since they had fled Night City and set up a temporary camp fifty or so miles away before heading southeast to Arizona. They were waiting. Cassidy hadn’t reached the rendezvous point after the storm and the Nomads were on edge. It wasn’t like him to get lost in a storm, so the only alternative was that something went wrong. He was either stuck somewhere or… worse.

V crept through the camp, passing tents and lean-to’s and, predictably her eyes spotted a familiar figure on the ridge with a small elec-light beside them. She climbed her way up and sat down beside her.

“Evenin’ V!” Panam said in an overly chirpy tone. She was wrapped in a blanket, protected against the cold early morning air. Her eyes were red and puffy, even in the low glow of the pitiful lantern between them. V raised an eyebrow.

“Come on Pan… relax, it’s me!” she replied, holding out her arms. Panam broke almost immediately, falling into V’s arms and sobbing into her shoulder. “I know… Let it out girl,” she whispered as she rubbed her shoulders comfortingly.

After a good five minutes, she came up for air. “Thanks, V…” Panam said gratefully, wiping her nose and cheeks, “I needed that...”

“You missed a bit,” replied V, brushing a tear smear from her cheek. She pulled her closer for warmth, pulling the edge of the blanket around her shoulder. They sat and looked out at the view of the camp and the surrounding desert.

“I’m sorry, V... I’m all over the place right now...” She awkwardly moved her hand up to her face to wipe her eyes and remove a strand of hair out of her mouth whilst trying to stay wrapped up tightly.

“Hey, I feel you… we should be on cloud nine right now, but…” she trailed off as her thoughts returned to the awful moment inside Mikoshi. She shook her head and stared off into the distance.

They sat quietly for a spell before Panam turned away and began to fidget with the sleeve of her jacket.

“Um… V?” she said timidly, pulling at a loose thread.

“Yeh?” she replied, turning her head expectedly.

“You… uh. You think I’m a good leader?” She asked, staring off into the distance. V touched Panam’s knee for comfort.

“Yeah, ‘course. At least… I think you try to be,” she said cautiously, trying to be honest but kind.

Panam turned her head suddenly, “What… what do you mean by that?” She asked, a slight hint of panic in her voice.

V rubbed the nape of her neck, “You’re a new leader, Panam. A new leader that’s been through shit! You’re grievin’. Heck, we all are. Scorpion, Bob, Teddy. Saul... Plus with Cassidy being…”

“Don’t say it, V!” Panam snapped suddenly, her eyes full of fear and on the verge of bursting again.

“I wasn’t… was gonna say missin’,” She replied, moving her hand to her shoulder, and causing the blanket to fall off and a wave of chilly air made her shiver. She pulled it back over her and continued. “Truth is… even if you were the best leader around… right now…?” V paused, her words feeling false in her mouth. “What I mean is... you’re allowed a moment, you know?” V said softly and patted her knee again reassuringly.

Panam relaxed a little with a sigh, “Yeah… I guess you’re right V. It’s been… Fuck… it’s been bad... let’s not sugar coat it!” She bit, kicking the edge of the ridge with her heel causing a scattering of rocks and grits cascading down the rocky outcrop.

“A real shitshow yeah…” V replied, guilt flooding back through her mind. “Pan, it’s all my fucking fault! All of it!”

“Fuck V, enough of that shit!” she retorted angrily. “You’re family now dammit!” Panam barked loudly, her voice echoing out into the darkness. She pulled V into a one-armed hug. “I’ve told you already, it’s not on you...” She murmured, sensing a need for her to provide the comfort now.

“I just…” V began, sobbing softly as the last few weeks filled her mind again. “I’m all over the fucking place too, Pan! If it wasn’t for you and Judy, I’d just give the fuck up right now and end it!” The darkness seeped out of her, flooding the depths of her mind, unwanted and unbothered by its imposing presence.

“V! Don’t talk like that! We will fix you, got it!” She urged, squeezing tightly. “We will fix you…” She squeaked, joining V as tears filled her eyes.

They sat together in silent sobs, waiting for the sadness to subside and for the sun to rise over the cliffs. When the warmth started gently caressing their faces, they heard the distant roar of an engine, shouting its echoed chant on the wind, its tyres churning up the dust. Mitch was back.

Panam leapt down from the ridge and stalked across the camp, and V followed in her wake. ‘Please let it be good news,’ V thought in desperation. Mitch’s Gecko pulled to a stop, caked in sand and dust. Panam and a handful of others gathered around and waited as the door swung open. A few beats of bated breath came before Mitch rose from the car. And clung to his shoulder, a dust-covered, tired and dishevelled Cassidy.

A cheer erupted from the crowd as Panam launched herself towards them both in a choking bear hold.

“Jesus Panam! Gimme a little air would yah!” replied Mitch struggling to breathe. Panam released them, tears swelling.

“Sorry… I…” she struggled, lost for words. V moved in to help Mitch support Cassidy.

“He’s severely dehydrated, found his car, ass sticking out the dirt, nose fully buried… hard to tell what the hell happened but, seemed the cabin was sealed and had just about enough air for him to hold out! Lucky bastard!” Mitch sneered with a smile. He looked down at Cassidy.

“Lucky! Pfff… that damn storm…” growled Cassidy, hoarse and barely audible, “…was worse… than I thought… sent me… flyin’ down a… canyon… and…” He sputtered, coughing between every word before he coughed himself silent, wheezing.

“Ok… Ok, we’ll hear all about it tonight, Cass, but right now, let’s get some fluids in yah, Kay?” Panam said, ushering them into camp past the cheering onlookers.

“You damn fool, near gave me a heart attack!” yelled Carol, swooping in and driving her shoulder into V to peel Cassidy away. “I got him!” She barked, as they carried him off towards the medical tent. V shook her head and held back and saw Panam turn. A smile beamed across her face, and she mouthed, ‘Thank you’. V replied with a smile.

‘Wow… how about that, Johnny? A bit of good luck for a change…’ V thought happily in her mind, reaching out into the depths. Silence.

Back at their tent, she entered to find a waking Judy. “Hey, you…” V purred watching her stretching out of her sleeping bag.

Her multi-toned, pink and green hair was dishevelled, swooping across her head, strands of which were all upended at awkward angles. She wore a small grey tank top, one shoulder of which had slipped down off her shoulder as she slipped out to lean on her elbows. A sleepy smile formed on her face.

“Heeey!” she replied in a low growl. “You sleep all right?” She yawned, rubbing her eyes sleepily.

“Nope,” V spat plainly, and flumped down beside her, planting a quick kiss on her lips.

“Oh no really…? Still struggling huh? Well… I for one am loving the quiet!” Judy replied, a big grin on her face. She looked adorable in the mornings.

“Glad to hear it. Want some breakfast?” V asked, hopping back up.

“Mmmhmm… Please, I’ll uh… I’ll wait here…” She said as she stretched out, causing her sleeping bag to slip down further. She wriggled free of it and kicked it aside revealing her favourite blue shorts and her long, beautiful, tattooed legs. She stretched them out, leaned back and added, “I’ll be waiting...” She flicked her hair back and shook, as it flopped about doing absolutely nothing to it. If anything, it now looked messier. V giggled before heading back outside.

She headed across camp to find Miguel had beaten her to the grill and was cooking up a storm of sausages and synth meat. The smell was intoxicating.

“Oh boy! Can I get in on that, Miguel?” She asked, her mouth literally watering.

“Of course, Hermana!” He called out, as her translation subs appeared in her lower peripheral vision translating Hermana to Sister. He picked up a couple tortillas from a stack beside him. “Anything for you and your chica, eh?”-girl. Miguel said with a wink and fixed up a couple of breakfast quesadillas. “There you go, V, enjoy, eh?”

“Gracias, Miguel, realmente!”-Thank you, really. V replied, giving him a quick hug in thanks.

She walked back to the tent and the picnic table outside, “Rise and shine! Breakfast on the table!” She called across to the tent. She laid out the quesadillas and glided across to grab some cans from the cooler when her holo pinged with a message… from Judy. She raised her eyebrows and swung back around to the tent, the cold cans numbing her hands. She wiggled her head through the tent flap. “You just ping me or have I got a virus?” She asked, confused.

“Hah… Yeah, I did, but…uh, don’t watch it yet! Be out in a sec, OK?” Judy said nervously. She was half dressed, wearing her go-to black bra and was pulling on her dungarees.

“OK... I would press you on it, but these cans are so frickin’ cold!” She cried out, freeing her head and dropping them down onto the table.

V sat down, and for the first time in three days, she felt a sense of calm. With Cassidy back, they’ll be on the move again any day now and they could finally leave Night City far in the dust. On a clear night, she swore she could almost see the towering lights from camp. It was probably her imagination, like a ghost image burned into her retinas. No doubt everyone would feel better when that was no longer the case.

They had, after all, attacked not only Arasaka Tower but a Militech-controlled checkpoint and Night Corp construction site to get there, not to mention busting out with stolen Arasaka tech and the stolen Militech Basilisk. They were on a few shit lists, and the sooner they made themselves scarce the better. Being here in this camp felt like being in a kind of limbo, but once they moved on, V felt like her life might resume. What was left of it...

Six months. Or maybe more, according to Alt Cunningham, rogue AI and ex-output to Johnny Silverhand. She’d “overlooked the human factor,” the toll the Relic put on the body. Her body! Though, according to Alt, it wasn’t hers anymore. It was Johnny’s. And she, V, was now nothing but a passenger, a fucking cancer, sitting in a borrowed shell. An engram. Fuck! Was she… was she even a person anymore, or just a collection of synaptic wavelengths of emulated consciousness? Did she have a soul? Hurt her fucking head just thinking about it.

The one thing she knew for sure though was that she wasn’t about to give up; ‘Saul didn’t die for nothing...’ she thought to herself. She didn’t go to hell and back and risked everything for six fucking months… not if she could help it. Not now she had something to lose. Someone…

“Hey!” Judy chirped, appearing from the tent, “Oh... Miguel’s quesadilla?”

“MmmHmm… come on, they’ll get cold!” V said, passing Judy’s across the table.

“Can’t have that!” She beamed broadly and sat down across from her. She took a big bite, closing her eyes and moaning as she savoured the taste. “Mmm... fuck that’s good! What seasoning does he use!”

“No one knows, he mixes it himself or so I’ve heard... man’s got a gift, considering what he’s working with!” V giggled.

Nomad life wasn’t the most glamorous; something the both of them were still adjusting to. Having hot food and running water was a surprise to them; they imagined washing in rivers, eating wild bugs and protein bars, huddled around campfires for warmth. There was a surprising amount of tech involved in the camp, most of which was admittedly sat idle in this temporary camp. But they still had the gas stoves, the heated water trucks for showers and well... campfires for the evening, because some things just work.

It wasn’t exactly what V had in mind when she decided to leave Night City with Judy, but it was a pretty good start.

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#cyberpunk2077 #cp77 #judy alvarez #v cp77 #fic rec #this was writtern by my husband and is awesome #its so cute gettting to watch him get sucked into writing #he talks about it INCESSANTLY #and im like ha! see?

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