...what ifs.

No. I have nobody here and I am not searching. For the past two years I tried to find something... I tried to convince myself. I couldn’t.

I will wait here, happy when you write those couple of lines and tell me how your day has been, what you achieved, what you fear and what you feel.

I can’t count times I wished that we could repeat that one time we went to have drinks, talk and feel weird. Maybe have a cook-off. 

 I’ll wait alone here, wait to see. So that this time, there is no...

...you.

Where are...

... alone again.

With a few simple words,

born from fears and demons.

With just a moment of anger,

born from thousands of miles.

With nowhere to plant more words,

nowhere to warm those fears and demons.

Here I am...

If only...

...you knew.

Hmm...

You... The streets are silent without us

bumping into each other...

If you are lonely tonight, you are not alone. 

I just want to wrap my arms around you and convince you,

that everything will be ok.

Kiss your neck and see you fall asleep in peace.

... burn what separates us.

Whisper to me, tell me what you really think. Show me what really happens, behind those shining stars. Introduce me, to the real you and I... I will...

I do.

Missing you comes in waves and tonight I am drowning.

Anonymous (via mypenleaksiridescence)

When you are attracted to people, it’s because of the details. Their kindness. Their eyes. The fact that they can get you to laugh when you need it the most.

Jodi Picoult, Sing You Home (via thelovejournals)

Well...

How we end up losing someone that will never be replaced...

Out of fear of being alone, we become lonely in love.

If only I had time to get you to be comfortable. Around me.

To... Just sit and chat.

I’ll remember.

Try to understand... It’s not as simple as I would like it to be. The thing that people call soul wanted, for it to last longer. Wanted to be close  for those remaining days. Wanted to hold on. I would like you to believe that you are fascinating to me. That for months I wanted to spend hours learning about you, with you. To listen. Sometimes I wish I was that selfish to not think about what you’d have to endure. Those that seemed oblivious, with words they would tear you apart, like I heard them do not once. Would I be happy if you wouldn’t?

Majuscules only hold my words. Not above.

There are words behind your eyes, I could swear that I could hear them. For there is something deep and heavy in them. For there is so much more to know than you want to show. , I would like to know. More.

Whether I am still delusional. I would travel... Leave... Let you lead. To wherever.

Maybe I’m still dreaming. I dream constantly. Since reality, like asymmetry... Still I’m dreaming of your eyes.

Yet again I wonder. If you were as happy as I was... On Wednesdays... Under your smiles. ______________________________________________________________________ Maybe I am wrong, but... it feels like you want to find someone... Either able to decipher what’s behind these gleaming fires, or... Engaged enough to let you say it all, To the very brink of cracks in asymmetric reality.

Maybe I’m still dreaming... Either way... thank you for those 30 minutes.

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