I draw a lot and try to post my digital art. I have my own little universe that I write and draw for, although as of now I don't post any writing I do. Call me by any pronouns really, I don't care what you refer to me as. And if you wanna call me by a name in asks or whatever you call call me by ny nicknames Jak, Jac, or Jack! And I also have a deviantart I post more constantly to! It’s JaksOcsAndStories for anyone wondering! I also as of now have a railroading side blog that’s dedicated to American trains! It’s @american-railroading for those wondering!
@drowsyartist Justin x Chris, this is how she talks about him and it’s oddly sweet. Even if he looks like a sewer rat.
I could fix him. I could make him worse. Good for you. I could gently take the weapon out of his shaking, blood-soaked hand and hold him until he finally believes that he doesn't have to be defined by all the ways the world has hurt him. Then we could ruin the lives of everyone who has ever treated him like he's a monster who doesn't deserve love.
People underestimate how much it fucks you up to be subtly excluded as a kid. I would try to talk to my classmates and be met with disinterest or annoyance. The one friend I had, who I clung to and nodded along to his every word, had other friends he liked just as much or more. And his other friends didn’t care for me at all.
I look back at pictures from the time and see how separated I was from them. I remember knowing I was different. I remember posing questions about the world to the girls playing next to me and realizing that they had never asked the same ones to themselves. That the ways we thought couldn’t be more different.
I kept myself amused with my own fanatical stories and musings in my head. I would wander the playground on a circular path, imagining a friend and being sorely disappointed when it didn’t feel as real as I’d hoped.
There was a bubble separating me from everyone else, thin, and nearly invisible, but with a pearly sheen you could catch under the right conditions. I knew it was there, they knew it was there, and it changed me