I think something I really enjoy about Shima's character and the writing of his arc is how he has conceptualized wants as something that are beyond him - not necessarily because he doesn't have them, but because he believes they are not within his reach unless he is able to offer something of himself in exchange. Especially if that want is affection.
While Shima was definitely deliberately avoiding thinking about his feelings for Mitsumi, I do believe he had some understanding that he liked Mitsumi as more than a friend - that he wanted to be "special" to her.
While he did not (prior Vol. 9/10) conceptualize that "special" connection as necessarily romantic, he was definitely aware enough of that desire to be willing to ask her out.
While Shima has been pretty deliberate about not thinking about his and Mitsumi's relationship, he is incredibly aware of his attractiveness and place in the social hierarchy. From his perspective, romance is not necessarily a connection between two individuals as much as a social politicking system.
This is definitely somewhat just me enjoying #problematic dynamics but I think that there is something very romantic about saying "I'm okay with being used if it's you" haha.
Since Mitsumi broke off their relationship, obviously, a big part of the development that's Shima has been going through has centered on him being able to confront even having desires, but I think they do such a good job with this of showing how his previous disappointments and rejections - largely from his mother - have led to him automatically assuming that others will not be amenable to his wants unless it benefits them in some way.
I think others might have another interpretations, but even this scene:
Is so funny to me because, yeah, obviously Mitsumi wanted some space to cool down, but also would have definitely said yes if he had just asked if he could tag along with her. His tendency to both be indirect and to show the "need" for him to be around are things that ultimately, don't work with Mitsumi.
Mitsumi beginning to move on from prioritizing him as a romantic interest, going back to just treating him as simply a friend - combined with him feeling unstablilized by not being wanted for something other than his role as an object of desire - is really what spurred his ask in Ch. 60 imo.
Still cannot conceive of a world where he can just ask for what he wants without needing to prove that he deserves it.
Tl;dr Shima is growing and healing but still definitely still in the torture cube
I just realized some people don't know what hey Melissa is and I just wanted to see how many people on tumblr have seen it/know what it is (also please reblog for more results)
stephanie lauter is fat btw. if you even care. and shes still considered hot and desirable and popular by her peers. and theres nothing you can do about it
i cannot get over let it out at all after rewatching tgwdlm just the way he switches between being under pokey's control to paul fighting back, its so seamless and it scratches my brain so gooodddd, also the creepy smile he wears as the hivemind takes control ough hes so goodd
okay but the release of the npmd pro shot has me rewatching all the hatchetverse musicals/content.
and omg i kinda forgot how much Jon absolutely ATE "Let It Out" in tgwdlm. he put his whole jon-ussy into that song. like:
the acting of Pokey's mind control fighting with Paul? incredible. the way his facials switch so quickly and you could just tell the difference.
the vocals? show-stopping. that high note on "NEVER!"?!?! literally what the fuck. i wish i could hit that note as flawlessly as he did.
the sheer power of "I..don't. like! MUSICALS!"? i was incinerated. broadway stars were crying because they knew they'd never come close.
listen, all i'm saying is Jon deserved a tony for that performance and it's actually so criminal that starkid isn't like widely known by the general population.
It has been hard for me to talk about how what is going on with Israel and Palestine is affecting me personally, but I grew up in Gaza and most of my family still lives there. My father did not survive the bombings last week and I have not been able to contact my younger sister in days. I am try to being understanding that most people do not have personal connections to what is happening and therefore are justifying their silence, but is heartbreaking to see this misinformation being spread. What’s happening there is a genocide, not a war. It is not antisemitic to support Palestine, it’s not even antiemetic to criticise Israel. There is no grey area or neutrality regarding this, and it is so easy to find resources that will educate you on the subject. It is my people and my home being destroyed so I will never be silent about this, but I please urge everyone to get informed and start speaking up and finding ways they can help.
decolonizepalestine has tons of information on Palestine’s history/propaganda that has been spread throughout the years
UK citizens can email their MP asking for a ceasefire
US citizens can call/email their local government officials asking for a ceasefire
Jewish Voice for Peace also has many resources for ways for US citizens to get involved, including protests