hashtag animashun

uh oh: the teacher quote bible

We made an entire book of out-of-context things teachers said at school for one year. It’s 23 pages long and consists of things like:

1) “It’s Jeff Bezos. It will become Amazon.”

2) "You can dress up as furries, which terrifies me. Don’t do any weird furry things.“

And my personal favorite:

3) "We’re not doing creativity. I don’t like creativity. This class is not about creativity … No creativity in this classroom!”

Shout out to all the childless whores that be fucking up them pretzel lines at disney world. Y’all are the worst and some random mom out there hates you.

So I was a counselor at a camp this summer, right?

And something we liked to do was do skits with the kids. And boy howdy. The 7th and 8th graders' final skit was a wild ride. They decided to demonstrate exactly how raiding area 51 would go down with some people representing the aliens, some the Naruto runners, and some the Kyles, with "Kyle" written across their foreheads, arms, legs, etc. One girl was even Katy Perry singing ET as a "halftime show" between the Kyle's and the Naruto runners. It was so elaborate and terrifying to the directors that they were speechless afterwards while everyone else was losing their minds. The girl narrating it was making self deprecating jokes the whole time. It was peak Gen Z humor through and through but no one got it other than the people performing and some of the other counselors. Glorious

Never too far <3

Yes. I need this

Remember when the turtles broke into area 51 just to make a fucking snack

A warm chibird hug for you all! 💛 I’m exhausted but full of lots of love after AX. I’m so grateful for all the kind souls who visited me and told me about the impact my art and book have had on their lives. I really treasure those meetings, thank you all.

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It's disturbing how society's focus on an arbitrary number set by the legal system keeps them from realizing that legal adults who are 18 and 19 are still teenagers. And it's disturbing that most of society expects so much from young adults who just graduated high school or even college, who have no real experience with the technical side of "adulting."

Things like understanding taxes, insurance, healthcare, buying a house, buying a car, living on their own, taking care of a child, taking care of themselves, hiring people like exterminators or lawyers, the intricacies of getting and working a job that isn't retail or food service, banks, saving for retirement, the stock market, unions, the list goes on and on.

Society expects them to be successful and know these things immediately, and they're punished for not knowing them because "you're an adult now." I'm twenty-one and still feel like I'm seventeen. I didn't even feel like I was seventeen at seventeen.

It seems like most older adults don't remember how leaving high school and college feels like a rug being ripped out from under you because you suddenly have no set path anymore. The skills you learned for survival were solely for how to be successful at the education system and aren't useful for actual life. I learned how to regurgitate facts exactly how a specific teacher wanted to hear them. That's what I was taught in my 16 years of school.

I wasn't taught how to live.

Combine that with childhood abuse, mental illness, trauma, and you have a person fresh out of hell who's walking down to the next level without a clue of what horrors are to come.

When your mind randomly goes back to one specific scene in a movie that you watched as a small fetus and realizes the dirty joke and now you’re just left there wondering just how many of those dirty jokes went over your head as a kid and whether or not you need to rewatch every single childhood movie so that you aren’t kept awake until 4:34 in the morning because you no longer need sleep, only answers.

Or even better than the icicle, shove a huge chunk of ice down their throat so that the death is chalked up to natural or accidental because it doesn’t leave a puncture wound.

Also, when disposing a body (by burying them) do it vertically because satellites specifically look out for holes that are around 6 ft long

wear a different perfume when you commit murder fuckin amateurs 

Long time no see