gets naked again🏊

ok but helen and odysseus have SO much potential as a brotp. his lying/disguise skills + her vocal impression abilities? the chaos would be UNSTOPPABLE

charles has to be letting max hit every time he mentions the inchident this is like the only explanation for max’s obsession with it

I keep imagining red bull having an unofficial set of rules for dealing with Lestappen

Max needs to talk about Charles for at least 3 hours a day for his mental wellbeing

For everyone else’s mental wellbeing there is a rota

Max doesn’t know about the rota, he just tends not to notice if the person he’s talking at is replaced

(The record is 4 different people during one maxplaining session)

If you ever need to distract Max just mention Charles and he’ll forget about whatever he was originally saying

This does not need to be subtle.

You are not allowed to mention Charles Leclerc in any meetings or they will last at least 30 minutes longer than scheduled

You are not allowed to mention karting in front of Max or he will start talking about Charles

Similarly for Ferrari, red, Monaco, ice cream, or anything that might remind him of Charles

If Max is angry or grumpy, the only way to fix this is by listening to him talk about Charles

If you ever see Max talking to Checo about Charles you have to interrupt (Checo has to deal with both of them every race weekend)

lewis absolutely looses his mind when he comes back home from his trip in winter break and sees how long his boyfriend’s hair has grown. lewis can’t stop himself from pulling his hair when max sucks his dick so perfectly and when red bull driver fucks him into other universe its only place for his hands. at first max doesn’t notice lewis’ new obsession and complains about length of his hair and how much they bother him. he stops when lewis speaks in a threatening tone that “if you put goddamed scissors on your angelic hair we won’t have any sex until it grow back to this length”, so max quickly shuts up. later, after another rounds, max allows lewis to do some hair routine in shower

pictures from @/ARandomUser695 on twitter

Abu Dhabi Grand Prix 2018

游龙戏凤 and Lestappen

The phrase is basically talking about an emperor seeking his lover in reference to their delicate dancing around each other on track.

I think one aspect of this commentary people don’t get is that dragons are primarily more masculine in Chinese culture and phoenixes are usually more feminine.

So in this context here with two guys, the commentators are basically discussing who between the two of them will be willing to “bottom” and be the phoenix.

IM DYING 🤣🤣

tired: mermaids are all women

wired: much like elves, merfolk are mistaken by sailors for being all women because they have long hair and are very pretty

goals

So make a superteam? That's worse.

Absolutely we make a superteam. Max and Charles assume their final form of Ultimate Track Terrorism in a Ferrari that makes the Adrian Newey Red Bull cars look like an Alpine. Their cars are jet engines, and Max and Charles are finally in equal machinery since the first time since karting, this is true lights out and away we go. I’m talking trading wins ever race, Max pulling a move he knows will have Charles driving into his front wing, akin to pulling your crush’s pigtails on the platonic. Meanwhile, they’ve lapped everyone else five times. They are drivers closer to gods than men, driving for a team that is closer to a church than a company, but they have also regressed to being fourteen again, pulling off physics-defying feats of racing just to get under each other’s skins. They are an Eldritch Horror to everyone else in the paddock, a nightmare the other drivers (especially whoever poor soul ends up in P3 that week) can never seem to escape from. They are The Superteam. They are Charles Leclerc and Max Verstappen, Scuderia Ferrari drivers.

(I assume this is about my Max to Ferrari agenda).

Nico sorry to tell ya but you're the definition of resentful gay boyfriend

I can recognize one when i see it

‘September 1994’

HE WASNT EVEN A MONTH OLD DID THEY REALLY EXPECT HIM TO BECOME ANYTHING ELSE OTHER THAN A DRIVER

i want to share with you some of my favourite graffiti from Pompeii

“Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!“ 

“Amplicatus, I know that Icarus is buggering you. Salvius wrote this.“ 

“We two dear men, friends forever, were here. If you want to know our names, they are Gaius and Aulus.“

“Floronius, privileged soldier of the 7th legion, was here. The women did not know of his presence. Only six women came to know, too few for such a stallion.“

“On April 19th, I made bread.“

“ I have buggered men.“

“If anyone does not believe in Venus, they should gaze at my girlfriend.“

“It took 640 paces to walk back and forth between here and there ten times.“

“Chie, I hope your hemorrhoids rub together so much that they hurt worse than when they every have before!“

“Epaphra is not good at ball games.”

“Two friends were here.  While they were, they had bad service in every way from a guy named Epaphroditus.  They threw him out and spent 105 and half sestertii most agreeably on whores.“

“Secundus likes to screw boys.“

Is there a word that’s a mix between angry and sad