zerokcalsugar
roosa
22 // tw ed // trying to become that girl
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hey boos the school year & training season are beginning again so i’m back trying to get off my ass. i’ve been eating like a monster which i kinda blame my bf for bc that man is 6’4” so he can eat whatever he wants without it really showing so he thinks we should have some snacks every time we see each other aaagh
thankfully i’ll have the excuse that i’m busy af the next few weeks so i won’t be hanging around with him that much so i’ll be able to skip those extra kcals
went for a run today for the first time in literally 2 months & felt like i was gonna die. rip all the progress i made in the spring
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Did anyone else go through a random recovery where your mental health just improved in general which allowed you to kick your ED mentality to the curb and see through body dysmorphia but then gained a decent amount of weight making you unhappy with your body and reverting back to ED habits even though you don’t have the same obsession anymore and now feel like you don’t really have an ED anymore because it’s not that bad you just have disordered eating and also kinda wish your mental health would just fuck up so you could at least go back to being a real Anorexic/bulimic ect. Because boy this feels shit and confusing and I really do feel like I’m faking it now.
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aaagh we made plans to go visit my bf’s parents in a month & i’m already freaking out abt what i’m gonna wear bc he comes from a firmly upper middle class family & i for sure don’t & i don’t wanna seem out of place
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i cut my nails too short so now i’m stuffing myself with protein so they’ll grow asap
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the best coffee truck ever is going to be at the festival i’m going to work at <3 hope i get situated somewhere near it bc they make the only actually delicious iced lattes in all of finland lol & having one at the start of my shift will make it much more breathable to make it through the 13 hours i work each day
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2 8 . 0 6 . 2 0 2 3
black coffee // 2 kcal
strawberry & lime skyr // 235 kcal
lettuce and light caesar sauce // 53 kcal
fruit baby food // 124 kcal
low-fat quark with blackberries and chia seeds // 168 kcal
t o t a l
581 kcal, 68g protein, 5g fiber
tdee ~1800 kcal
deficit ~1220 kcal
fasted 21h
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visual representation of what i lol like rn vs what i want to look like on the fall
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2 7 . 0 6 . 2 0 2 3
black coffee // 2 kcal
chocolate bcaa pudding // 148 kcal
sf energy drink // 15 kcal
mifu, macaroni and peas // 397 kcal
rye bread, margarine, lettuce, cucumber and mini plum tomatoes // 244 kcal
t o t a l
804 kcal, 63g protein, 12g protein
tdee 1760 kcal
deficit 955 kcal
fasted 20h
n o t e s
less protein than i’d like but i didn’t wanna increase my intake since i can’t work out this week + will probably eat over my tdee for at least three days this week
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i actually won’t workout in any way this week bc i got an appointment for a belly button piercing today bc someone cancelled their reservation 🤩
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i’m sorking security at a music festival from thursday to saturday & they’re like 13h shifts each day so i know i need a lot of energy but i just logged my planned meals into mfp & it’s ~1700 kcal per day now not including dinner 💀
#i’m gonna buy festival food for dinner every day so idk yet what it’s gonna be#something greasy for sure tho#sugar.txt
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2 6 . 0 6 . 2 0 2 3
black coffee // 2 kcal
turkey filées // 528 kcal
a fruit smoothie // 112 kcal
mifu, macaroni and peas // 397 kcal
t o t a l
1040 kcal, 155g protein, 5g fiber
tdee 1760 kcal
deficit 720 kcal
n o t e s
so much protein & so little exercise :(
only had that smoothie bc i desperately needed some fiber lol
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aaaah it would be the perfect weather to go for a run but my knee is so done after cheer practice that it would just be dumb to attempt to run :/ will do a quick ab workout instead when i get home
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week 25 workouts
m o n d a y
2h cheerleading practice
3.2 km rec run
85 (57) zone minutes
11k steps
t u e s d a y
30 min full body workout (natacha océane)
26 min fartlek run
91 (63) one minutes
9k steps
w e d n e s d a y
250m swimming - 2’40”/100m
3 x 10m up a climbing wall
80 (67) zone minutes
14k steps
t h u r s d a y
20 min recovery run
15 min stretching
53 (33) zone minutes
13k steps
f r i d a y
3 zone minutes
12k steps
s a t u r d a y
6.5 km cycling - 13.9 km/h
1.5h soccer
6.5 km cycling - 13.4 km/h
71 zone minutes
14k steps
s u n d a y
30 min sprints & bodyweight exercises
42 (35) zone minutes
6k steps
n o t e s
that 30 min natacha océane workout took me more like 45 min bc i had to take additional breaks
the x (y) means that x is the amount of fitbit zone minutes i earned and y is the actual amount of active minutes (bc minutes of very strenuous activity are count twice)
had two runs in my plan that i skipped 😬
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so i ate like shit for a couple of days while i was with my bf but it was like, amounts a normal person would eat still
but yesterday was supposed to be my first day getting back on track so of course i binged on chocolate and chilli nuts
didn’t even burn any calories bc i didn’t go for a run like i was supposed to & i don’t think i will go today either bc i once again completely ignored my alarm & once j got up it was too hot to go imo
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someone drive over me bc i’ve eaten a ton of chips, a whole was pizza and half a litre of regular soda 😭😭
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okay i’m still nauseated so i’m just gonna start getting ready for Beach Day and just feel guilty abt not working out for the rest of the day
probably would help if i ate something but obvi i’m not gonna do that
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so anyway i think i’ll give myself another like 20 mins of laying in bed suffering & then i’ll walk to the grocery store to get beach snacks & if i feel alright when i get home i’ll do abs
i’ll just skip the run if i don’t feel up to it bc i’m gonna have to re-do this weeks runs anyway before i can move on doing the plan bc i’ve done so poorly at every single attempt
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