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timextoxhajima · 2 days
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what if i think about outdoing hostis or lmll
You have to keep making new goals so it won’t be the end when you’re done with one. Think of “because I reached this goal, I can probably reach a higher one” and make new goals. You have to make new reasons for yourself to keep going.
k.b. // lee know from stray kids
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timextoxhajima · 6 days
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title: enemy
genre: e2l; rugby player! eric x cheerleader cap! [fem] reader; smut; ft. enhypen jay
synopsis: after some years of a brooding, competitive bond you've developed with eric sohn over being athletes, you find him again on the same field in different aspects - but this time, you have to cheer for him instead of booing him like you were used to.
warnings: cursing, probably alcohol, smut, toxic dynamics (i mean it)
wc: 4.3k
a/n: thank you for 1.3k+ followers 💕
song playlist: here
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the warmth and humidity from the shower rooms on either side of the common locker area was beginning to dampen the atmosphere. the hot steam from the showers fog up the room, hindering your sight in the space.
but you look to your right, and up against the wall was your teammate caged in by one of the rugby boys, blatantly making out, as though half the cheer squad and half the rugby team wasn't within sight.
"jesus christ, get a fucking room," slamming your palm onto the boy, you yank him off her. she yelps as the contact is abruptly torn away from her, and you grimace at how sticky his sweat had made your palm feel. "can you get off her? you have a game next week!"
"alright!" sunwoo raises his hands in surrender and stomps away from her, pulling his shirt off the nearest bench and throwing it over his shoulder. "mom much?"
"and you," pointing a straight finger at the girl, you narrow your eyes with disapproval. "do not get pregnant with any one of theirs."
"you say that only because you haven't made your choice," she sings sweetly with a pout, pushing herself off the wall and winking at sunwoo as she comes to link her arm with yours. "we'll find you your match, captain."
"shut up. i'd rather die than find a match here."
"ouch," sunwoo leans back with his arms behind his hips, flexing his torso and arms and you just know he was doing it for your pathetic friend to gawk at.
rolling your eyes, you shrug her off your arm and wave her off, so out of your peripheral vision, you watch her slide onto his lap and wrap her arms around his shoulders.
manoeuvring your way through the space, you make it to the last row of the lockers in search of the one person you really didn't want to talk to.
but you walk in on a half-naked eric sohn, mindlessly scrolling on his phone with just a towel wrapped around his hips and his wet hair stuck to his forehead. he's showered - you can smell the body wash - but old habits die hard and you immediately begin with a harsh, venomous spit.
"hi, you piece of shit, i'd like the key to the inventory room so i can undo the stupid mess your team's made. i'd look for sangyeon but i'm sure he's busy with other things."
eric turns to look at you with a palm outstretched, and his eyes dart up to yours quietly as he locks his phone. "what makes you think i have the key?"
"you're the inventory head," you turn your head when he stands up straight, now facing you, and the lewd sight before you makes you uncomfortable beyond any verbal expression. "who else would have the key?"
the windows from behind eric darkens his silhouette as he steps nearer and nearer to you, the distant sound of water in the showers and talking by the others a good distance away.
his shadow covers yours, and he blocks the light in your eyes by craning his head so he's staring straight into yours.
"key's in my locker. you can go get it if you like."
gritting your teeth, you turn your head to the opposite way and slide past him to his open locker, finding bottles of protein shakes and sweaty rugby equipment - but no key.
your lips part in immediate complaint, so you turn with a harsh frown, only to find eric holding the keys up before your nose and smiling childishly at you. "gotcha."
the annoyance is about to burst out of you when you swipe it from between his fingers, and you were just short of stabbing him in the eye with the key when he chuckles with that stupid smirk on his face.
"you know, the last person i'd expected to become the cheer captain was you."
"why?" you cross your arms and shake your head. "i highly doubt that's any of your business anyway, right?"
"no, i just- didn't take you for the type to cheer for me. it'd take me so much for me to imagine you holding pompoms with that high ponytail of yours and possibly yelling my name if i make that goal, but now it's... it's reality."
"shut the fuck up," you hiss and shove him backwards, holding your forearm against his collarbone as he raises his palms in fake surrender. "i will cheer for your team because it is also my team. but you will never catch me cheering for you. not this week, not next week, not ever. your name in my mouth?" you scoff and give him another harsh shove into the locker before stepping back, the sound of his weight against the locker echoing softly throughout the space. "in your dreams."
eric grins widely, looking down at the floor as you turn around and deliberately slam his locker door shut, this time, the slam ringing loudly.
"we'll see about that," he says with triumph. "i will make that goal!"
anyway, you're probably thinking - why do i hate eric sohn so much?
we've known each other since we were kids. lived on the same street. our parents invited each other's families to christmas dinners and new year's day celebrations for years.
not knowing that the two of us hated each other at school. both of us were on the track and field team. i was the fastest girl and eric was... well, average.
it ruined his pride.
i won, in case you were wondering. so he decided not to go back to running, and chose sports instead. he was in the baseball team and i stayed.
the story changed in university though. i got sick of running and joined the cheer team instead, and he seemed to miss it, so he joined the rugby team.
it fit his personality though, bunch of rowdy boys who didn't know better than sticking their dicks into girls from your team and other groups. ironically, eric hadn't curated such an image.
unlike sunwoo, who had his busy hand down a well of pussies before he met one of your teammates, eric was focused on his team. maybe he wanted to redeem himself, maybe he wanted to feel proud of himself for once.
but i couldn't care less. not really.
sometimes when i'm out on the field and he's running with the ball though, it kills me on the inside when it hits me that he's the one i'm cheering for.
yeah, i get it. 'isn't that the whole point of being part of the cheer team?' i know it is. i know it was my choice. but why did he have to choose the rugby team, the main sports team that our cheer squad jumps and stunts and yells for? why not the baseball team? why not the volleyball team?
maybe i could have a word with the principal about this.
the night of the game falls on your school like an impending doom - only because you've heard enough tales about how the new line-up for the rival's team was. good number of youngsters, fit and tall and also apparently very kind to everyone around them.
maybe the grass is simply greener on the other side, and you can't see past that. at least not with eric being on your side.
the teams grace the entrance path in their own stride, and while you cheered your school's team on according to your obligation, you couldn't help but notice the flawless features of what seemed to be your team's rivals.
they were right about them being tall and fit, but who left out the detail about them looking absolutely gorgeous?
99.
"y/n!"
your eyes immediately dart away from the entrance path and up behind you, watching your coach frantically flail her arms and nearly throw her clipboard at you.
"eyes on our boys!"
"'kay!" you lift an 'ok' sign and grumble under your breath, rolling your eyes as your teammates remain hooting and cheering by your side.
"you're looking at 99, huh?" your vice captain leans over and says, just loud enough for you to hear. "well, i would too, but he seems pretty occupied with you."
by instinct, you look up and witness him dart his attention back to the field, lined up and facing the team you were meant to be supporting. yet, out from the corner of your eye, you notice eric, the shortest member of your team, glare at you like you were his property. like you were his.
maybe now you were wondering if this is some ridiculous enemies to lovers thing that was going to happen between the two of you, but then the mere thought of him thinking he had the right to control who you looked at irked you more.
so all you did was to stare at 99 a little harder.
but before you could even catch his eye again, the game begins, and you're instinctively thrown into your routines. counting and yelling so your team knew what to do, making sure your teammates spotted for each other as they did their stunts.
not really paying attention to the game, but you were sure that 99 ran past and he could not take his eyes off you.
in your head, it could've been played out like a poetic, romantic beginning, wouldn't it? fleeting eyes and shy smiles under his helmet, maybe a quiet 'hello' or a timid touch on the hand.
you'd melt just by the very thought of that.
and yet that train of though is abruptly murdered by eric running straight up to you and slamming his palm down on your shoulder. your teammates are slightly taken aback, given that they know you hate each other, but eric leans into your ear, and even with his helmet on, you could smell the shitty body spray he used.
"ogle at 99 one more time and i make sure he gets off the field."
"what?" you shove him off yourself with your pompoms, frowning keenly at him. "that's playing dirty."
"and he's playing dirty by flirting with the cheer captain, no? i'm sure you wouldn't like it if one of your girls fucked one of them, would you?"
"sohn! what the hell are you doing there?!" the coach yells from some tens of metres away, throwing his hands up into the air and on the verge of hurling a whistle at him. "get your ass back here!"
eric grimaces, offering an embarrassed smile as he bows and lifts a hand in acknowledgement. when he turns back to you though, his smile disappears.
"i'll take 99 down if it means you stop being distracted."
"you'll get a yellow card."
"watch me," he steps back and adjusts his helmet.
and as the crowd dies down into the starting position, your team quietens as well.
eric is meant to be looking ahead, directly at the player in front of him, but you swear he was glaring straight at-
BEEP
the crowd erupts, a good amount of the audience standing up and clapping their inflatables against each other. random hoots and yells of the players' numbers swarm all around you. your teammates have been taught to continue cheering, though not in a routine, if they are playing on the field but for some reason, your heart is doing all the yelling instead.
luckily, 99's team seemed to be alot more agile (not to mention the fact that they had longer legs) and they make the score instead.
guest audiences erupt into loud hoots and claps and you can hear the coach yelling at your school's team.
99 turns to look at you, as if you were his girlfriend and he did nothing but conjure up all the butterflies in your stomach. out in the corner of your eye, you catch eric throwing a tiny tantrum by kicking into the grass, and you can't help the little scoff that escapes your nose.
throughout the entire game, the scores bounce back and forth. coaches and teammates were yelling at each other as if they were on opposing teams. the stench of body odour and sweat stark to stink up the atmosphere of the field.
the audience was getting restless.
the moon was high in the sky and had the area not been polluted with light, you would've been able to spot the stars.
but no, not when everyone was cheering on 99 as he dashed across the field with eric on his tail. you could hear the opposing team's benchies scream out a name.
jay.
and yours scream out eric to run faster. he might've been small, but he kept up the pace with 99 easily - the gap between them doesn't enlarge.
but suddenly, something clicks in eric. his feet speeds up in an instant and for a moment, it reminded you of the days he beat you on the track.
and that was in a once-in-a-blue-moon event.
if 99 made this goal, they'd win.
"jay! come on! don't let the fucking shorty get you!"
"come on, eric! run that ass! run it like your life depended on it!"
BEEP
and the crowd erupts into enormous cheering, some audience members and even your own teammates scream as they push past you onto the field. your vision and attention blacks out for a moment as eric rolls off 99 and throw his hands up into the air with triumph.
a sigh of relief heaves your chest unknowingly, and you can't help but break out into a smile when your teammates (the ones that aren't on the field making out with the rugby team, of course) throw their arms around you. their squeals automatically make you feel better, even if the winning goal was made by eric.
in the midst of all the celebration, however, you witness the stark contrast in your teammates' demeanour halfway through your group hug. before you could even say anything, one of them grabs your arm and turns you around.
99.
"hi."
you blink at his quiet greeting. his hair is wet from the sweat and it's stuck to his forehead, but he had such a gorgeous smile, you knew it was hard to resist.
someone rests a palm on your shoulder, only to shove you out of the stands and you stumble onto the grass, shooting a glare behind you at your teammate.
"i'm jay," he runs a hand through his hair and grins. he even holds out a hand, offering a handshake. but you're much too stunned to take it, so he clears his throat instead and keeps it under his helmet as he hugs it to his side. "i feel like i shouldn't be asking you this but do you have a boyfriend? i... the entire game- you were so hard to ignore."
he gulps, and you can see his adam's apple shift.
"you make it sound like that's my fault," you blurt.
"oh, my god," someone groans behind you.
"no! no, i didn't mean it that way. it's just... since you're not snogging someone out there, i just assumed you weren't... you know... taken. i just wanted to ask you if you were interested to go out on a date with me sometime."
"i-"
"she is!"
cockblock.
your eyes drift behind jay as he turns around, and to your dismay, eric's strutting up to the two of you with his helment shoved into sunwoo's arm as if he wasn't busy snogging with one of your girls.
"she's mine," eric smiles as he reaches over, resting an arm over your shoulder. with a deep frown in your forehead, you try to shrug him off, even attempting to shove him off you, but to no avail.
he keeps his palm tight on your shoulder, keeping you from shifting.
"ah," jay smiles with disappointment, and your heart drops at the thought of being taken away by this douche instead.
but jay is a professional and plays with sportsmanship, so he offers eric a hand instead. "great play, bud. sick catch up on the end."
"you bet it was," eric gleefully takes his hand and almost throws him away after 2 firm shakes. "anyway, a word?"
he turns to look at you, fringe stuck to his temples and brows.
"what?"
"a word. now."
you turn sharply to jay.
"i don't know who he is."
"she's joking. you know how girlfriends are," eric snickers as he pulls you away and in the direction of the field's exit.
"jay, i don't know who he is!" you turn and shout, but he could probably make out just about 1 word from your line with all the cheering at the back. it's disappointment all over when one of your girls seem to tell jay that you obviously do know eric, and by the time jay's lost interest, eric already had you at the exit near the shower room.
"what the fuck are you doing?" nearly screeching into his face, eric refuses to release your wrist. "eric! let go!"
with a sharp yank, you tear yourself away from him, and eric does not look happy when you do.
"what the fuck's wrong with you? you've won quarterfinals, so congratulations. why can't i win something?"
"what else is there for you to win? you've won every single time back when we raced."
"excuse me?!" you squint at him, disbelief drowning out your thoughts or any slither of logic in your nervous system. "you're doing this because you're pissed about something that happened 10 years ago?! my god!"
"you don't get it, do you?"
"what, are you gonna confess? because if you are, do me a favour and fuck off!"
with a restrained scream, you turn with your fists balled, your right foot stomping into the grass and headed back into the field.
eric though, had other plans.
his fingers wrap around your wrist first, warmth bursting up your warm in the midst of all that cold sweat from the temperature. then, he pulls you back into a harsh, and abrupt kiss as if he had planned it.
you resists first, fists balled against his chest and your eyes wide open. and yet, your body involuntarily relaxes when his palms drop to your waist where your bare skin was exposed, hot fingers tracing the lines where your cheerleading suit met your ribs and lower back.
instinct kills your pride and identity first - so you close your eyes.
then the feminine urge to reach up around his shoulders and neck and arch backwards overwhelms your thought process - and suddenly, eric isn't eric anymore.
he's just the hot jock on the school team.
his hold on your waist tightens as he starts to grip the flesh in your sides, your fingers digging up into his sweaty hair on the tips of your fingers. he smells like body spray and deodorant but it's the heat in the moment that ruins all your senses.
your hands grip into his uniform, pushing him backwards and into the shower room where the leftover plethora of body spray and deodorant was still hanging in the humid air.
he was already sweaty and your skin was sticky too, so it really didn't matter when the realisation of your writhing, hot bodies moved against each other against the tiles on the walls.
everybody was outside celebrating anyway, so who was going to hear eric's low grunts into your shoulder blades as he rails himself into you.
the thoughts swarm your head before it even happens.
you're not proud of it, but this is just a sip of a drug that you promise yourself you'll never have again.
eric lifts you onto the dressing table, hands already riding up your skirt and obviously completely forgetting that it had an attached pair of safety shorts. so your hands drag his hands up to your chest, resting his palms on your curves while you struggle to remove your shorts (or skirt).
his breath is heavy on your lips, and you're starting to smell the body odor off him under the uniform you're trying to strip off him. breaking the kiss only to remove your bodycon top, his fingers curl around the rim of your shorts and yank them from under your rear.
something tears, and your first instinct is to glare at him first.
but he grabs your face and messily slots his lips between yours, groaning into your tongue as if he wasn't the one shoving you backwards into the wall.
your arms calm on his shoulders where he finally removes his uniform, his palms haphazardly travelling down his own torso to pull his shirt off and undo his sports belt.
it's a shameful instinct when you part your legs, letting him press himself into you where your nerves explode all through your body upon the pressure.
your fingers begin to crawl up into his hair behind his head, gently tugging onto his sweaty locks as he dives into your neck with a hand beginning to play with you.
"fuck," you hiss into his ear, brows and jaw tilting upwards as he nips into your skin. your palms find his chest, hot and sweaty and your fingers dragging all over the curves of his skin. the bone where his shoulders are, his collarbones below his neck that was beginning to sweat, and the set of abs he had below his pecs.
but before you could go any lower, he grips your wrist and pulls back, the abrupt lack of physical contact tears you out of your lustful dream.
yet, he doesn't give you enough time to respond before he's pulled you off the table and runs his lips into yours again. blindly stumbling backwards, your knees hit the edge of the bench and he topples onto you, awkwardly trying to find a position where he wouldn't completely load his weight onto you. but he hoists you up with an arm and flips you off the bench instead, using a finger to push away your lingerie where your jaw slacks upon his finger plunging into you.
your fingers dig into the gaps between the wooden planks in the bench, and your head hangs low enough to watch him get on his knees.
for a moment, your eyes widen, surprised. but they flutter shut almost immediately when you feel the friction from his tongue on you, pushing the air out of your lungs as you jerk forward.
his arms hook your hips backwards into his face though, and your teeth sink into your tongue in a bid to silence yourself.
but you had expected eric to be experienced, and he probably knows girls love it when things come unexpected.
because his tongue disappears, and is soon replaced with himself prodding at you.
"if only you could see the way you look right now," he bends over and whispers into your ear, pressing a kiss into your shoulder as he slowly sinks in. his lowly groan runs chills down your spine, and your fingers curl around the edge of the bench for the umpteenth time.
your mind goes into static haywire as you feel your weight start to be pushed and pulled back with his fingers digging into your hips, eyes blurred and hearing muffled from the overwhelming sensation from within.
"that's it," he whispers into your shoulder blade, letting you whine and mewl under your breath. "what a good girl."
"shut- the fuck up- would you?" the thrusts cut you off between your words, and you've barely strung it together, honestly.
"when you're bent over for me like this?" he scoffs, panting through his sentence too. "don't think so."
and as he finishes his line, he goes harder, pushing you past the edge of the bench and pressing your chest into the wood instead. gentle yelps escape your mouth first before you choose to bite your own finger, and eric's in too much of his own daze and pleasure to do anything except slide his hand down your hip to rub you in circles.
your eyes are tightly shut when the friction pushes you into an alien zone of bliss, and your grip on the legs of the bench tighten. your legs turn uncomfortable, holding your weight up, so eric makes sure to hug your hips with one of his arms while still working his hands.
"good girl, are you gonna come for me?"
"fuck, i-"
"i know," his husky voice groans into your spine. your lips part and your eyes seal shut once more when he goes slower but harder.
he knows he's found it.
your fingers curl into the wood. your head is thrown forwards and the structure of your ponytail is long gone. your legs begin to give out under you as the shudders spread through your body, and eric releases you only because he knew he couldn't afford getting you pregnant, so he pulls you back up and turns you around.
shameful instinct.
you drop to your knees and let him slide himself into your mouth, abdomen still shuddering from the finish as he jerks himself off.
his load hits the back of your throat, and he groans so loud, it almost sounds like someone had taken a shit.
the embarrassment fills you like his load dripping down your throat, and he pulls himself out with half-hooded lids. you swallow whatever's left of your pride on your tongue, but eric finds the need to thumb a dab of his own cum in the corner of your mouth back between your lips.
"good girl," he whispers, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "told you i'd get you to say my name."
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timextoxhajima · 6 days
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oh my god im the beyonce of tumblr aint no way
PARK SEONGHWA FIC REC!
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ATEEZ MASTERLIST
Content tags! favs: ☆ mature: (M)
Playing nice [6 parts] @sa-honey
Just friends. (M) [36.7k words] @baekhvuns
On one condition [19k words] @ateezmakemeweep
Aemulus (M) [8.1k words] @sluttywonwoo
Playboy (M) [5.7k words] @timextoxhajima
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timextoxhajima · 6 days
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DAMN I'M STILL RELEVANT?!?!!
PARK SEONGHWA FIC REC!
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ATEEZ MASTERLIST
Content tags! favs: ☆ mature: (M)
Playing nice [6 parts] @sa-honey
Just friends. (M) [36.7k words] @baekhvuns
On one condition [19k words] @ateezmakemeweep
Aemulus (M) [8.1k words] @sluttywonwoo
Playboy (M) [5.7k words] @timextoxhajima
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timextoxhajima · 15 days
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One day is beautiful and it made me cry
i have a fic called one day????
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timextoxhajima · 28 days
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sometimes i wake up and check my tumblr and see 20 bulk notifications at once and i open it to find out that someone is going through my hostis masterlist
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timextoxhajima · 1 month
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currently working on a little sweet home spin off... something like when i did ntl and it had 'related' themes... but the more i think about it the more i have to write but that seems like alot of effort.
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timextoxhajima · 1 month
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♡ favourite minho looks: 12/∞ ©
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timextoxhajima · 1 month
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fun fact: when i was 4-6 i loved informative books (like encyclopaedias for kids, especially anything to do with dinosaurs, egypt and mummies, animals)
and then when i was 7-12 i completely dropped it because they made me read in school, meant to help me learn how to write and i hated it - but i drew my own comics and wrote them despite hating reading.
but when i was 13 and went to secondary school i picked it up all of a sudden, to the point that i read my books under the table during math class and was caught for it. ever believed that someone would get caught... for reading? that's me!
around the same time, i started writing for aff, and transitioned to tumblr in 2020 and that was history.
“how did you get into writing” girl nobody gets into writing. writing shows up one day at your door and gets into you
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timextoxhajima · 1 month
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minho moments [42/∞]
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timextoxhajima · 2 months
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I MISS UUUUU
WHO ARE YOU I MISS U TOO IG????
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timextoxhajima · 2 months
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i know im old and becoming irrelevant when someone whose username has 'riize' in it starts following me TTT
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timextoxhajima · 2 months
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when i tell you i was absolutely FLABBERGASTED
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timextoxhajima · 2 months
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what if i wrote a fanfic but with no actual idol characters LOL
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timextoxhajima · 2 months
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i came home from a really long day to find this... and i'm just in awe that people are still reading my things </3
Love Me A Little Less Chapter Navigation
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Title: Love Me A Little Less
Genre: 3rd person pov, arranged marriage au with juyeon, angst cause is it a dana fic if there’s no angst, fluff, comedy
Featuring: Kim Younghoon (OC’s brother) | Kim Sunwoo (Juyeon’s friend) 
Warnings: Cursing, Alcohol, *TW Character Death(s)
Synopsis/Quote: “i didn’t think it’ll hurt so much, seeing you in pain.”
COMPLETED
Keep reading
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timextoxhajima · 3 months
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wtf they logged me out of my acc and when i came back in i couldn't even recognise it
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timextoxhajima · 3 months
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one day
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i will stop falling in love with you, the words that you utter and then i hold so close to my heart, as if not another million people do the same
i will find someone who likes me the way i like you, unconditionally. in the way where just a thought is enough to leave a mark on the rest of my day
i will sing and cry and dance as if we were best friends sharing the stage, sharing a supper, sharing my deepest sorrows and secrets
i will pretend we become more than friends, perhaps in another life where your life is simpler and private, and your love is all for one person
i will let you break my heart over and over again, if it means this love lasts forever and you know that if nobody loves you anymore, then i must be dead
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