monthly wrapup

Short month but big month!

Reading

Finished reading Snapecase fics. Lots of awesome Snape fics. You can read them on AO3. Need to write comments but that’s going to be a March project.

Read the latest updates on The Afterlight. I am not really a WIP reader but PI’s fics are my one big exception. Like give me a good reason not to read 10K of hot Snarry mess updates. Gosh they are so messed up and perfect.  Need to write a comment which is not just GUH!!

Started catching up with Danni’s prolific February. Gray Eyes (Tell No Lies) is the hottest Draco/Sirius I have read. Also Hatefuck is perfect Snarry vibes. Also Lovestruck has tons of possessive Harry which is one of my favorite things ever. Plus it’s set in Contemptverse, my fav Snarry fic of 2022!!  HIGHLY RECOMMEND!!

Started reading ALOTO series Love & Baseball by Billsfangearring who had a prolific February with some amazing fics. Also behind on commenting.

Finished group crying with some HotD friends about the last cut piece from eldritcher’s Ossuarium. This was pretty emotional because the fic was so huge for us in the last few months. Also respect for eldritcher who not only completed 250K of the formal fic in like 2 months but also posted every single last cut/draft when folks requested it...which was an additional 320K. So we got 570K of Ossuarium and it’s honestly the best thing I have read. Sometimes fics drag on for too long or kind of drag in the beginning/middle/towards the end. Ossuarium is super compact despite the word count and doesn’t really have a single dragging moment. Absolutely phenomenal. I was also personally really sad to see it ending because eldritcher has been pretty vocal for months that this is the last symphonic cycle they are doing in fic which is why they went above and beyond. I hope that’s not the case. But it’s definitely the best series I have read. It was super thrilling to follow it from the beginning. Also really behind on commenting

Recs

10 Femslash Fic recs with 10 Age Gap Pairings with Hermione for Femslash February.

5 snapecase recs

Need to make AO3 collections for them.  Pretty behind on reccing. 

Movies/Books

I saw Cocaine Bear! Life changing. Is it any good? Nope. But it’s definitely more fun compared to MCU anything. YMMV of course.

Also finished reading The Furrows by Namwali Sepwell. Actually if you like imagery/poetry you are probably going to like this book. I liked the first half but I feel like it didn’t really emotionally connect with me after that. Which is pretty unexpected because normally I am a sucker for this type of prose. Maybe I need to read it again sometime. 

RL has been busy so I am just kind of behind on fandom stuff.  Layoffs at work but I kept my job for now which is nice. Super busy and somehow doing more work to compensate for the folks laid off... Also into capitalism sucks memes right now for some reason :D 

2022 Fic in Review

Rules: filter to 2022 on your AO3 stat page and answer some questions/link some fics for everyone to enjoy! (Some of these questions were taken from a wrapup meme on Twitter and some from one seen on Dreamwidth. Twenty-five in all.)

1. Your yearly word count:

23,196 words. This is a lot to post. I actually wrote much more into works in progress, however.

2. Fave fic you wrote this year:

"over the water, over the sea (with you)" [https://archiveofourown.org/works/40664607]

I keep returning to this, because it encapsulates a depth of feeling I find hard to express in anything other than fanfic. I love writing these characters and getting inside their heads; I keep saying that and it keeps being true.

3. Fave fic you read this year:

"As You Like It" by RiverFragrance; it's so perfectly tropey. [https://archiveofourown.org/works/42446331]

4. Fave ship you wrote for:

Obvs, Yukawa/Utsumi. This was the only ship I wrote this year.

5. Fave character POV to write:

Yukawa Manabu's. This was on purpose, since I have a work in progress that's from his perspective, but has so far proven difficult to write. I've had to stay in the headspace for it. The easiest way to accomplish that was write most stories from his perspective.

6. Fave line you wrote:

"Past and present merge like colliding wavelengths, the pattern of interference now visible for what it is." (open the door, don't let it sting) [https://archiveofourown.org/works/41077578]

The way holograms are made is amazing and fascinating. Yukawa applying his knowledge of physics to his emotional state to achieve realization, gathering all the clues at last.

7. WIP you finally finished:

"the frequency you're giving off"   [https://archiveofourown.org/works/41335740, explicit]

I was assembling research items for this as far back as four years ago, when I came across a gif of a couple on the beach in front of a fire. At that point in time, I wasn't sure what it was meant for; I kept thinking about it and building understanding with research, until I arrived at this story.

8. WIP you've yet to finish:

"your chain tied to me tight"

A story about boundaries, communication, and ties that bind, set a few months after the conclusion of the first season of Galileo, for my personal project of a Kink Bingo card.

9. Your most read fic this year:

"open the door, don't let it sting" [https://archiveofourown.org/works/41077578]  

This, at the time of writing, has 72 hits, beating out "the frequency you're giving off".

10. Your longest fic this year:

Posted, it's "open the door, don't let it sting" at 7,993 words. Unposted, it's "'til they sparked" currently at 18,268 words. It's slow burn; actual literal slow burn for the first dang time in my life. I only hope I can stick the landing.

11. Your shortest fic this year:

"all you see is red" at 298 words. A tiny scene of Utsumi and Yukawa on a date in a museum. [https://archiveofourown.org/works/40300701]

12. Fave fic title you used:

"the frequency you're giving off" borrowed from a song by Alessi's Ark. I just love the way it wraps up all the themes in the story and I was also hoping I'd be the first to use this lyric as a title and I think I was? Though it doesn't matter if I wasn't.

13. Biggest surprise while writing this year:

Being able to stick to writing a story or scene for every one of the Sunshine Challenge's prompts for this year. Also, because of that, I was able to write a continuation to "Ready to Hope" which I truly thought would not happen.

14. Fave comment you received this year:

Probably cosmictuesdays's response to a snippet of a story I'm writing. I've thought about it at numerous times throughout the year and it pleases me each time.

15. Fave fic author to read this year:

RiverFragrance. Although I'm only just dipping my toe into all the Chinese fanfic that exists, RiverFragrance has such a good understanding of Yukawa and Utsumi and consistently delivers good plot.

16. Total fics/chapters uploaded this year:

Eight. This is very good for me and also seems to be what I can expect most years.

17. What are you looking forward to next year?

Finishing -- hopefully -- "your chain tied to me tight" in time for my birthday. After that? Just more works in progress over the summer; hopefully also writing the remaining four works of my 30Kisses project.

18. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

"drop through your likenesses" [https://archiveofourown.org/works/40300710]

This was written for Sunshine Challenge and 30Kisses, and I'm proud of it because it took a prompt I thought was going to be difficult, but by means of intense brain-storming I was able to write something I had only half-formed ideas for and make it exactly what I wanted. Additionally, it also is one of the best examples of my writing style. I've worked hard to clean my prose, while making it poetic, and this does that.

19. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

All the kudos on "wholly to be a fool" are rather a surprise. [https://archiveofourown.org/works/41987514]

20. What work was the quickest to write?

"all you see is red" Written in about two hours, into the box at Dreamwidth.

21. What work took you the longest to write?

"the frequency you're giving off" Started at the end of 2020 or beginning of 2021. I don't know because my first backed-up draft had many words in it, already and I can't recall when I started. *shrug*

22. How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?

Four documents started, ten in total planned.

23. What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

Everything unfinished, of course. "'til they sparked" is proving to be the one that got out of hand, and it's just the third in a series of... possibly five stories. I don't even know at this point because my ideas for what I want to include are well-formed but impossible to place at the moment.

24. What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

Maybe, possibly, mulling it over: Loid/Yor.

I also have an idea for a Kishitani & Kuribayashi fic that I like thinking about but would take a lot of planning.

25. What do you listen to while writing?

Mostly synthwave, lo-fi, chillwave, and barberbeats. Barberbeats is the best find I made this year to unlock my writing brain.

Sometimes I listen to the songs that inspire the titles; like for "open the door, don't let it sting" I listened to "Rule #1 - Magic" by Fish in a Birdcage and "Read My Mind" by The Killers on repeat for a few writing sessions.

November 2023 Wrapup

Ostensibly, this is the last article of the year that follows the ‘normal’ pattern of the rest of the year. There’s a whole month more after this, but this is kind of the last spot I have to put anything that doesn’t fit in Decemberween… … which is to say this is my last chance to be spiteful, mad, or cruel about something. Not that I spend a lot of time doing that, but it’s definitely the point at which I have to get any last minute spite out the door.

Oh, you don’t need to worry, you don’t need to worry about that at all. I’m not going to burst into vituperous rage over something, mind you. It doesn’t show up this month.

Much.

Here’s a funny coincidence; thanks to how I treat November, as a catchment bin for everything I do randomly throughout the year, this month has four articles that were collaborated between me and Fox. Two of them were in this month’s Game Piles:

Dinosaur Island Rawr & Write, where Fox and I talked about a kickstarter game of making dinosaurs out of dice.

The Adventures of Willie Beamish, where Fox and I talked about a 90s point-and-click adventure game about corrupt union officials and walking your dog

Here to Slay, a game that irritates me for being merely fine when it’s so incredibly good looking

Root, Mastery Depth & Material Demands, a long form video grappling with how great Root, the game is, and about the idea of Mastery

And then Fox came along to talk about some anime we watched together!

Deca-Dence, where Fox and I talk about a show we really liked that’s also, just like, extremely strange? It’s a tight, short series that hits a lot of ideas really fast? It’s hard to summarise.

Wave, Listen To Me!, where Fox and I talk about a much more downbeat comedy anime that still manages to do that thing I love in a show, which is deep nerdy examination of the specific experiences of a niche interest.

Do It Yourself, which is the same thing and I did watch it with Fox, but this time the thing they were focusing on was Industrial Arts.

Bocchi The Rock, last year’s all-purpose, everyone-loves-it, everyone-knows-it meme queen phenomenon, which has been waiting to show up a year since it first aired.

Outside of those regular features, I wrote about the prestige classes of 3e D&D, and the complicated relationship they have to player power. I talked about the the 4e monk and suggest moving it to Martial, out of Psionic. I also talked about how the principles of interface design can be wholly considered for principles of game design. In world building, I talked about the Origin of the word Orc and the notion of Corrindale as a place for events to happen in. If you’re more into Magic: The Gathering, I wrote a three part series on the Transformer Commander magic cards, and then about the impossibility of Universes Within adapting the Dr Who and Lord of the Rings cards.

Almost finally, I wrote a buyer’s guide for Invincible Ink products for this Decemberween, and then, most seriously, a reflection on the establishing of new habits.

Man, the shirt designs came thick and fast in the end of the year. This is just one of many, but I wound up making a Locked Tomb fan design. You can get it here, and it’s pretty much the same vibe as everything else I do. Though I am now also wondering if I should get some stickers of it to share at Cancon next year.

Huh.

Maybe I should do that with more of my designs.

November has Desert Bus; November has Marking Season; November has the end of work for the year and the clearing of decks. November, in my own mind is an unofficial theme month of no effort November. Throughout the year, any time I come up with something that’s non-thematic to that month, I will throw it forwards, into November, because that’s forever away.

November is also a month where I figure I’m going to take it easy. A lot of the articles of November are already written, and that means November’s writing time is often spent on building the otherwise relaxing Decemberween posts, which, as of time of writing – halfway through November – I’m halfway through writing up December! That’s pretty cool!

But November is also the month when the queue gets depleted. Marking days are huge amounts of work, and the result of smashing through them meant that my brain was pickled. It’s no secret to me that a lot of what I write about is ‘what inspired me today’ and it turns out when you watch a lot of student material all day, any inspiration from that feels… icky. Like, I don’t want to make articles responding to ideas my students put in my head even if they’re interesting, because that feels like shooting down at someone who can’t shoot back. And like, if my student says something that spurs me to talk at length about something I should talk to them about it because they are paying me to do that and teach them things.

It’s like how if I spend a weekend hanging around with my niblings and playing board games, I largely don’t want to talk about how they behave with those games or what they think of them because that’s making my family, kids who have no control over it, into hash-tag-content. It seems bad!

In practice it means that at one point, right at the tail of October, my pad of posts, which had peaked at 45, had dipped down to 26. That means there were at least 19 days in which I did not write anything.

Right now? I’m writing this because it pushes me over a threshold (31 from 30, meaning tonight, I will have 30 queued, and that feels good). Then I get to dive back into my literature review, fingertips itchy.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

AO3 Wrapped (and various other writing meme questions)

I was tagged by @lynne-monstr to do this about two weeks ago, but at that point I only had 4 publicly attributable works on my ao3 for 2020, so I decided to wait. In the meantime, I came across some other good questions (thanks gumi!) so I figured I’d answer those as well!

Total Word Count: 16,860 --way higher than I thought! (even after i subtracted those two spn fics I wrote 7 years ago but only uploaded this year)

Fandoms: Stranger Things, Still Star-Crossed, Critical Role, Quan Zhi Gao Shou (The King’s Avatar)

Top 5 fics by word count: (here’s where things get hilarious)

i am no icarus (Still Star-Crossed): 5514 words of OC-heavy court intrigue, written over the span of about 4 days. more than twice as long as anything else on the list. I don’t know what about this yuletide prompt possessed me, but MAN did it possess me.

summer’s best hairstyle (QZGS): 2387 words of fluff. Not what I usually write but the image wouldn’t get out of my mind!

Stuck (Stranger Things): 2340 words. Honestly, I am proud of this one, even though it’s a bit sloppy and not my best work, because it got me back into posting things again, and more importantly got me into actually finishing things instead of writing them halfway and then deciding that no one else was going to read them so why put effort into finishing them. It’s the joy of the process, people. and also the joy of going back and reading my own work again because I am my first audience member for most things.

pics or it didn’t happen (QZGS): 2319 words. This one was...so much fun. It was so dumb, but so much fun. I think my favorite thing about it was asking wack, “can i do this? is this too weird?” and then just giving myself permission to be totally wacky.

Take the Hurt (Critical Role): 2300 words. I’m finding that I do well when other people prompt me, because the two “possessed by an idea” fics on this list both stemmed from other peoples’ prompts. Thanks, wren, for this prompt!

Clearly I have a sweet spot, because 4 of my six fics for this year are all within 87 words of each other (and the last is at 2k, so not that far away).

Top 5 fics by kudos: (lots of duplicates, because I only have 6 fics on the list)

Take the Hurt (Critical Role): 269 kudos.

A Different Patch of Sky (QZGS): 52 kudos

Stuck (Stranger Things): 31 kudos

summer’s best hairstyle (QZGS): 28 kudos

pics or it didn’t happen (QZGS): 26 kudos

I think this is where the difference between a big fandom and a small fandom are very apparent. I feel like for most of these fics, everyone I really wanted to see these fics saw them and liked them, and that’s all that really matters.

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January 2020? I mean I had never even heard of The King’s Avatar/QZGS/cdramas in general in January, so that was definitely a surprise. I also never thought I would do an exchange because writing for someone else is so much more stressful than writing something for yourself.

What’s your favourite story of the year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you happiest. This is a hard one--I like all my fics for different reasons. The one I’m most proud of at the moment is ‘i am no icarus,’ because I tried something different with that one and I think it paid off well. But I also really enjoyed writing “A Different Patch of Sky.”

Do you have any fanfic goals for the New Year? Honestly, my goal for this year is just to keep writing, and keep finishing things. I have some plans for fics that I’d like to do, and I want them to live as fully fledged fics, and not just bullet points on my drafts page before the end of the year. But even though one of my goals is to finish stuff, I also want to learn...when to let go of ideas, I guess? I feel like this year I rediscovered a lot of joy in the process of writing, and the fact taht even when the words don't come easily or I have to throw an idea out altogether, none of it is wasted writing. I got halfway through a fic for yt before realizing that it wasn't going to work and tossing it, and it was from trashing that idea (that I really wanted to make work!) that I got the inspiration for i am no icarus. I also want to work with a beta more consistently, because I love when I do, but I don’t often reach out--and I SHOULD reach out more!

Tagging: most of my writer friends have already done one of these, so this is an open tag to whoever wants to do this!!

art vs artist for writers but its just a center picture of someone who looks like theyve been dragged by their shirt collar through hell and back surrounded by collages of near-identical google doc screenshots

2021 Writing Wrapup!

This year I wrote 147,712 words and 20 stories.

My total Ao3 wordcount more than doubled this year! With chapter stories accounted for, that's 39 posts, an average of a story update every 9 - 10 days. Which means I exceeded my goal of posting every two weeks!

Thank you to everyone who read, left kudos, reblogged, commented, beta’d, rec’d, acted as a sounding board, chatted in discord servers, or otherwise provided the encouragement to keep writing. You all are what makes this fandom so fun to create for. <3

Gonna combine this with the Writer Year in Review Meme suggested by @wutheringmights and include a little excerpt from one of each month's stories.

January

They all look worried. Serious. Not quite meeting his eyes. Sky thinks they’re afraid for more than his health. No, actually, he’s sure of it. They’re waiting for some kind of negative reaction.

So Sky gives them his gentlest smile, and summons the strength for a full sentence, searching for something that will ease the tension. What makes it past his lips is, “The name Four makes so much sense now.”

-Handle With Care (This year’s most popular oneshot!)

February

Vio nods. Blue points an accusatory finger at his brother. “You’re manipulating me and it won’t work.”

-Keep From Cold

March

Hyrule sighs. It’s full of understanding. Legend wishes he could say the same of himself. Light pressure returns to the back of his head. “Legend?” Legend shakes his head as best he can without removing his face from the safety of Hyrule’s hip. All his biting words dry up, wither and die in his throat.

-This Will Be My Monument

April

Legend crouches by Sky to pass him a potion, stiff and moving like a man three times his age. Sky frowns at it. “Is there enough?” He knows as well as Legend does that potions are like gold when they have no idea how long they’ll be down here or what they’ll encounter.

Legend makes an exasperated noise. “Sky. You can’t walk. I’m not carrying you through this dungeon.”

-My Heart’s Forsaken Me, chapter 3 (Most popular story of the year!)

May

Four is slow to look up at him, distant and guarded.

“Unless you have any objections, I would very much like to hug you.” Four blinks at him. Dips his chin in the tiniest of nods.

Time picks him right up off his feet. His armor is in their room, so there are no harsh lines of hard metal between them, only Four’s ribs under his hands and his head tucked in next to Time’s. Four hugs back, his arms hooked around Time’s neck, one hand curled around the back of Time’s head, just as fierce. “You already had my respect.” Time says the words low, his head near Four’s, just for him to hear. “But it’s doubly true now.”

-My Heart’s Forsaken Me, chapter 6

June

His smile is twisted, a little bitter. Not an expression Wild is used to seeing on Hyrule’s face. “It’s not like I’ve got much else to offer. Just a cave. Who wants to live in a cave?” The words are sharp little things for all that they’re quiet. Prickling, drawing little drops of blood out from Hyrule’s heart and putting them on display for Wild to see. They should be out of place in this kitchen full of welcome and warmth, but they’re not. They fall into place like the knives in the block, encouraging Wild to respond in kind.

-I Got You, Chapter 2

July

There’s a trick to knocking back a potion. Straight to the back of the tongue to minimize the taste, swallow as quickly as possible. Hyrule has plenty of practice at it by now. That doesn’t mean the bitterness disappears as it’s going down. Hyrule lifts his head, wiping at his mouth with a grimace, only to find Zelda doing the same.

“Oh, that’s foul,” Zelda breathes.

“This,” Hyrule raises the empty bottle in one hand, pointing at it with the other, “is disgusting.”

-Tea for Three

August

He leans forward, hands clasped in his lap, searching Sky’s face with intent. “How do we heal it?”

A sinking sensation adds to the disquiet in his middle.

“You don’t.” Sky tries to say it gently. Hyrule frowns. Sky thinks he sees a flicker of panic behind the focus.

-I have no fear of drowning; it's the breathing that's taking all this work

September

“What is that?” Fascination coats Sky’s voice. It doesn’t take much to get that one’s attention. Legend figures he’s safe to ignore it.

“Does it have fur?” Four sounds horrified. Slightly more worrying.

Then, a noise at his back Legend’s only ever heard in a dream.

-Meet the Family, chapter 4

October

Four freezes. Shock and disgruntlement war for space on his stunned face. The whites of his eyes show all around the edges of his irises, eyebrows a pair of arching curves, mouth all knotted up on itself like he just ate something nasty. His elbows lift away from his sides as if that’ll somehow help alleviate the feeling of wet clothes sticking uncomfortably to skin. Water drips off everything: the tips of his dangling fingers, his hair, his nose. He looks like nothing so much as a wet cat that someone’s picked up under the armpits in an attempt to keep it from scratching.

Wind’s cheeks ache with how his wide grin threatens to split his face. “Got you!”

-Ruckus and Rapport

November

Legend turns back to Twilight. “What,” he says, in a voice that doesn’t sound like his. It’s far too small.

His teeth are chattering.

Twilight squeezes his wrists and lets go, steps around Legend to dig through the chest at the foot of the berth. He comes back up with a thin blanket bundled in his arms and sympathy painted across his face.

“Don't,” Legend says.

-Nothing You Keep

December

Time looks him over. He’s gone very quiet. Hyrule finds himself reaching out to say hello in the fairy way before remembering that Time won’t hear him. A dozen different verbal apologies and greetings play through his head, none of them quite right.

Please Don’t Come For Me, chapter 5

Hello moonbeams~! Writing letters is something I’m good at, because even if I stumble in all other forms of communication sometimes, my writing, my words never fail me. The overall negative energy, annoyance and sometimes hatred towards the pandemic, the social/political topics and the year in general can be very draining and or taxing on me and you all. Of course we’re upset too but seeing so much hate can be draining for people like me, and maybe you. So for a moment, grab a seat and a blanket and listen as I read this letter to you. This is a letter from me, to you, and I offer a blessing from her majesty the moon herself as well.

2020 has been one hell of a year that’s for sure. I experienced a lot of sadness, fatigue and overall lower moods as I tend to take on the energy of the world heavily. There has been so much that’s happened to us all, sadness, fear, anger, heartbreak; but even still we survived it. There were so many that felt we wouldn’t make it through this year or make it to the end as it felt like it would go on forever, but we’re here now, to write these letters, to tell these stories. 

Even in this hectic year, I experienced so much, I felt happiness, joy I cried a lot and released so many pent up feelings, I came to terms with things I had locked away, I laughed a lot, I found passions that I thought were long lost. So much has happened to me in this year both ups and downs and I’m grateful for it all. You may be wondering why I would be grateful for downs as well, they helped teach me things, how strong I am; how it’s okay to give in and feel your sadness or pain; to validate my emotions; and a lot more. I hope that with all that’s happened you were able to take in some lessons yourself.

Below this cut, I wanted to thank some people who made my experience on tumblr as wonderful as it has been, more amazing than I had ever expected it to be. I came on here extremely nervous about sharing my stories and these people have been so warm and welcoming and honestly I wouldn’t have enjoyed my time as much without them. I’ll have my ending message at the bottom of this. 

@sleepylixie Lily darling, my brain twin!! you’ve made my short tumblr life so much fun! sharing brain waves one moment, soundboarding ideas the next, and having so many things in common between us it’s crazy (wolfie gang). You’ve become one of the best things to happen to me on this site! xoxo thank you for always sharing your wonderful ideas with me and for sharing my love of fantasy!! Oh and I can’t forget all the shared screaming we do over skz and anything else xD I’m so glad we started talking and even in just a short time I feel so close to you already!! Thank you for letting me vent out all my ideas and for letting me be that person for your ideas too, thank you for always giving such good feedback and opinions and thank you for just overall being one of my favorite people to talk to. I hope we can make more wonderful memories in the coming year and beyond it. love you darling have a beautiful 2021~ 💜💜💜 ⟪ song rec: Another Day - Stray Kids ⟫

@rebecca-noona​ Becca! You were the first person to interact with my blog and when I look back on it, I’m so thankful you did. I love our talks about Korea and skz and writing. Your support has always been incredibly helpful, thank you for always being a cheerleader for me, it means the world. I hope you know I love you and support you and your works and whatever you wish to do so much as well!! I’m so happy we started talking and you make me so happy. Thank you for being my friend and when I finally get to Korea you gotta show me around when you get back!! I hope your process of getting back is smooth and easy, stay as optimistic as you can love!! xoxo  ⟪ song rec: motive - Ariana Grande (ft. Doja Cat) ⟫ 

@skzctnightnight​ bel! bel! :DD it’s your words of encouragement that helped me create this blog, you’re one of the reasons I’m here!! your works have been some of my favorites and I was so happy when I first reached out to you. Your kindness really touched me and being your anon at the time was so much fun >v< Prowl will forever be one of my favorite series and you inspire me with your works!! I love talking with you no matter if it’s a quick chat, or a long convo, I always love talking to you. Thank you for making my 2020 so nice! I’m glad I know you and let’s talk more soon! <3  ⟪ song rec: Clarity - Kim Petras ⟫ 

@aliceu​ Alice!! I’m so thankful we met by chance when replying to one of Lily’s posts LOL I think it was an ask of yours about fantasy, and we shared a mutual love for it xD I want you to know that I always smile and I’m always happy when you send asks or dms so please I hope you never worry about being a bother and keep sending them hehe >v</ Thank you for always taking some of your time  to check out my stories and for always leaving such wonderful feedback too!! It makes me happy to read your mini reviews about them!! Thanks for having little chats with me too. I enjoy them always and I hope we can continue to chat more 2021!! Please have a great new year and stay safe and comfy uwu ⟪ song rec: TMT - Stray Kids ⟫ 

@t-toodumbtocare​ Bar! xoxo I’m so glad we finally started talking and I’m hoping we can talk more soon >w<b You’re so fun and sweet and your stories are cute!! I wanna read more soon!! >^<9 Thanks for our little chats and thanks for checking out my stories as well I appreciate it. I hope to get to know you better in the coming year and I hope you have the best 2021!!  ⟪ song rec: Cruel Summer - Taylor Swift ⟫ 

@delicatewerewolfsoul​​ Vicky!!! I’m so happy we started talking! I loved talking about animals and pets with you and I loved all the skz soft hours asks you sent (I hope you send more of them psst psst) they made my day!! You’re such a sweetheart and you’re a master of heart memes xD I hope your 2021 is wonderful just like you are!! Stay safe and warm you cute bean xoxo ⟪ song rec: Inception - ATEEZ ⟫ 

@dreamescapeswriting​ Hi M!!! Okay full disclosure!! I’ve actually read some of your works before having tumblr LOL Like I really enjoyed them (Lucky and You Love Me are so cute) and honestly I was shy about reaching out but I’m so glad I did because now I wanna continue to talk and send you hugs! >V< I’m so glad we’re both gamers and your asks make me so happy! Thank you for being the sweetie you are and I hope we can talk more in 2021!! Have a great new year cutie!! <3 ⟪ song rec: False God - Taylor Swift ⟫ 

to my mutuals and other moonbeams who I wanna talk to more and love and support so much!! @mikoto-ica-fics​ @hanflix​ @chogiwow​ @redsandroses​ @meiiyue​ @missskzbiased​ @rosieecheeks​ I hope we can talk more in the new year and I love you a lot!!! You’re all such beautiful souls!! Know I’m sending you love and hugs and all the support I can muster \>v</ xoxoxoxoxo ⟪ song rec: Breath - GOT7 ⟫ 

To my beautiful nonnies, I’m super happy you’re here. I miss you all and hope you’re well and to the new ones welcome welcome!! I hope you know all your messages make me so happy! When I started my blog, I didn’t imagine I’d have as many anons as I do now, I didn’t think I’d have many, maybe 2 or 3? You guys make me so happy and I hope to see you more in my inbox when you have the time!!! <33 ⟪ song rec: You Can STAY - Stray Kids ⟫ 

To all my followers, my darling moonbeams!! Thank you so much for joining on this journey of practice and self-love that I’ve been trying to embark on. The comments, the reblogs, the likes, the asks, all of it, it means the world to me. To re-learn that it is possible for people to enjoy what I do, and not tie it to my own self-worth has been something I’m so thankful for. You all helped me learn that so thank you. I hope you continue to enjoy the stories I put out and feel free to reach out anytime! I’m so happy to have 300+ (almost 400) of you lovely moonbeams here! I hope you all have a wonderful 2021! It doesn’t matter who you are, how old you are, where you come from, what you identify as, what you believe in, or who you love; you are all precious moonbeams here in this haven.  ⟪ song rec: Haven - Stray Kids ⟫ 

I know I say it a million times but since this is a wrapup letter I’ll share it again shortly. My blog was made for the main purpose of learning to appreciate my passion for writing and to not cage myself from posting and sharing my stories. I wanted to learn to write for myself and that posting stories in and of itself was the main victory, and everything else was the bonus, instead of thinking when people like it, only then is it good. I’ve done that before and having learned from it I now feel more prepared to tackle this. Thank you again for all the warm welcomes and the love I’ve received it still hasn’t quite sunk in for me and it feels so unreal. To know you all enjoy my stories and give me so much love, it’s crazy and it’s happening and I am so happy. I’m very thankful I took the leap of faith even though I was scared and decided to create this blog! 2020 challeneged me as well as pushed me and supported me. I experienced hard times yes, but I also experienced some really amazing things. I found comfort in things new and old, I feel like the quarantine made me come to terms with myself more, not run from things I wanted to confront and talk to myself more. I feel like 2020 albeit really draining in all ways, helped shape me and I got stronger because of living through this year. Now before I get any more preach-y than I already have LOL Thank you for being a part of my 2020 everyone!! I hope to have you with me in 2021 and I hope you experience the blessings of the moon like I feel we all do. See you in 2021 y’all! We’ll get through next year and the next and the next, I know it! 💜

Love Izzy 

AO3 Wrapped 2020 Meme

Tagged by @electricshoebox , thank you!

AO3 Stats for 2020

Total word count: 17,695

Top 5 6 by word count:

Courier Carrot (Fallout: New Vegas) (6285 words)

Tales from the Wasteland (Fallout 4) (3866 words)

What Do You Get When You Add a Poet and a Mentats-Buzzed Founding Pirate? (Fallout 4) (2508 words)

Sanctuary (Fallout 4) (1797 words)

Ruin (Fallout 4) (1351 words)

Proximity (Original Work) (790 words)

Top 5 6 by kudos:

What Do You Get When You Add a Poet and a Mentats-Buzzed Founding Pirate?

Courier Carrot

Tales from the Wasteland

Hancock

Becoming Sole

Sanctuary

(I went with 6 because Tales is a compilation that I recently abandoned in favor of reposting the chapters and continuing the story as stand-alone works in a series instead, including Sanctuary, Ruin, and Hancock. Figured it wasn’t fair to directly compare either the reposts or the compilation with the others 🤷‍♀️)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

This is a bit of a non-traditional AO3 wrapup, but it’s been a non-traditional time, so oh well.

About a year and a half ago, I began a year of medical leave from my PhD program. I had just been diagnosed, finally, with ADHD, and given the new need to learn how to manage it and to try out new medication, along with the crippling depression and anxiety I’d been dealing with, I needed time off. By the end of 2020 I would choose to drop out of my dream PhD program and dream lab in order to pursue a simpler but, hopefully, more enjoyable and better fitting career.

I had just moved in with my new partner. She brought an Xbox. My main gaming experience up until then had been Game Boy Advance. She suggested I try a game called Fallout 4.

Playing turned to guilty pleasure pinteresting of my new obsession, turned to guilty pleasure tumblring of my new obsession, turned to giving up the guilt and getting my first tumblr account. By the end of 2019 Sole and Carrot were born, and I was teaching myself to draw so that I could draw them. In 2020 I joined a discord, and the pile of friends I’d made through Fallout multiplied. I started writing fiction again, for fun, something I hadn’t done since high school or earlier. I got an AO3 (and a Pillowfort too), and here we are.

2020 has been a lot of things, a lot of good and a hell of a lot of bad. But I can honestly say that Fallout, and the community and friends and support that I’ve found in the fandom, was one of the brightest lights helping me survive everything the year has thrown at me. It’s helped me grow, from gaining skill in the new hobby of drawing and the previously abandoned hobby of writing, to socializing with internet strangers and discovering real friendships there. I honestly can’t describe how much you all mean to me.

May 2021 be brighter--but if it’s not, we’ve still got each other to hold on to. Love y’all 💕

ooc update: sorry I’ve been slower than usual to reply recently! work and holidays got to be a lot, and i had less free time than i thought i would have. thread tracking/works in progress, as of 1/13

also... i’m just. a very slow writer even when life isn’t so busy. like it often takes me an hour+ to do one response. and i can’t really write at all during the day cause my job is physical in nature. so no sweat if you wanna drop any of these threads, or ask for an alternate thread or plot out something different to do. i know some of em have been waiting for a long time!

strikethrough: replied recently

starters i still owe (to be turned into nonevent starters): kimiko miyashiro for softsliders19, natasha romanov or robb stark for skyfcll

post-wintermarket threads

rvkybusincv/diana

pre-wintermarket threads

lifecherished/mun yeong softsliders19/larry tragcdysewn/mj rainbowmuses/thor drvcxrys/jean bcrncoldx/kili mcrcki/leia (check in on this)

wintermarket threads

fragilemxnds/lois mvsicinthedvrk/yan mvsicinthedvrk/blathers bcrncoldx/sherlock mischiefmuses/hunter mcrcki/isabelle softsliders19/sam rvkybusincv/padme rvkybusincv/steeb dcpravities/angelica

meme responses that may or may not become threads if i can wrangle enough brainCell

grcycosmics/jed

posts that are not urgent but that i would rather like to do for completionist’s sake

wrapup post on the previous steve thread where clark just. hits the bricks before the poor guy can ask him what the hell is going on, leading into the current thread where he’s like oh no. i did not plan this through. i did not expect to see you again

4 Years ago I wrote this post about me making $4k per month and then turned it into a case study on how to build local service businesses. A couple hundred people from Reddit followed along to build companies and those companies now do a combined $50 million per year!If you want to start something in 2017, I've updated the case study a bit below.Note: This is local service business. Not sexy enough for most of you and that's fine. But I have not found a more predictable path to building a million dollar business than this and I’ve built several, successful, businesses so far.WHY LOCAL SERVICES?Frankly, there is a TON of money to be made.These are huge markets in terms of $$$. However, unlike regular e-commerce companies where you are competing with the best internet marketing people in the world, with local services you're competing with just the people in your neighborhood, most of whom do not understand internet marketing at all.And on top of this we come with a crazy advantage with online booking that 99% of the companies don't have. Imagine a store that sells simple things but for some reason nobody in the industry allows you to purchase online. Well a bunch of redditors are changing that in cities all around the world, and crushing it.And that’s why we have been able to take such a big chunk out of the industry so quickly. My goal is for this network to grow from $50 million a year to $1 billion in the next 5 years. I think it’s possible.A few screenshots from some of the folks that followed along...Here’s one guy, and another , and another, and another, and another, and another ...shoot the last one was launched by a 19 year old kid, they got to $2mil per year in 2 ½ years. Shoot, it took me 3 years to get $2mil per year. Bastards! hahaWhen you add all the companies up, it’s $50 million per year and most started less than 3 years ago. I have the raw data for that $50 million number btw, and we're working with someone from r/dataisbeautiful to go through it and create something to compare revenues, figure out growth rates, correlations with city sizes etc. Will make another post on that when it's done in a week or two.WILL THIS WORK FOR EVERYONE?Nope. But if you have hustle and been trying to come up with “business ideas” or haven’t figured out that sexy mobile app you’ve been dreaming about, then read on for how to build the most annoying (yet fast growing company) you can imagine.This isn't just me saying this btw, the fastest growing Ycombinator company (before they jacked it up) was also a home cleaning company.OKAY ON TO THE CASE STUDY: HERE'S HOW TO FINALLY START SOMETHING IN 2017Before you get started: Try to do just do one thing per day, even if it’s just reading an article, or it will get overwhelming. This is going to be a slow steady candle burning, not a quick passionate flash fire that burns out. Here goes:Sunday, Jan 1st, 2017That's today. Do nothing. Just chill, let the alcohol wear off, and relax. The next 30 days will be sick!!!Monday Jan 2nd: Choose Your IndustryWake up, eat a good breakfast and get ready to crush 2017. Choose one, listed here in order of likelihood of success in my opinion: Home cleaning, carpet cleaning, home painting, lawncare, laundry. I've also seen people do well with mobile car detailing, dog walking, and others. Simple local services, but we'll be doing NONE of the actual work! I’m going to assume home cleaning for simplicity for this guide, but you can interchange that with almost any local service you can imagine.Tuesday Jan 3rd: Use Yelp to check out the competitionCheck out your competition on Yelp by searching for 1 star reviews. Goal is to not repeat the things your competition keeps getting wrong. Watch this video on analyzing the competition.Wednesday Jan 4th: Adding ValueEasy day. Spend the day thinking about customer service and how you will add value to the industry. The goal is a long term successful business that does not repeat the issues your competitors have problems with. Watch this video on adding value.Thursday Jan 5th: Create Your One Page Business PlanThe days of the 60 page business plan is over. Fill this bad boy out as a simple guide. We'll come back to this as you get more information. Watch this video on the one page business plan.Friday Jan 6th: Choose a domainI typically use this site for domain ideas. I like to create domains that have one keyword in the domain and then one sexy word for human beings. Example: Lawn Tribe. That way both Google and Humans understand what you're offering. Watch this video on us choosing a domain.Saturday Jan 7th: BrandingGood looking people get more breaks in life. Same for good looking websites. Launch with a good looking brand that looks more like a startup than an old school company. The goal is to have the most professional site in your industry in your city. Just spend the day googling around for your service in your city and looking at their websites.Sunday Jan 8th: Chillaxing DayGo for a run, or bullshit a bit on reddit, or whatever you do to unwind. So far not much has happened, but next week things will start to ramp up and you'll need a mental break.Monday Jan 9th: Planning the website So we need to get a good looking site. Three choices: 1) Get a cheap wordpress theme and tweak it. 2) Buy a more expensive but ready-to-go theme that is already branded beautifully (if we do say so ourselves) 2) Most expensive: Get something built yourself. I personally like 99designs for homepage design and created a guide on how to get good outcomes there:Step 1: Setting up the contest: http://ift.tt/2iVDhqQ 2: Marketing the contest: http://ift.tt/2hDExdc 3: Finding Inspiration sites: http://ift.tt/2iVEEG3 4: Managing the contest: http://ift.tt/2hDwSM1 5: Wrapup and handover http://ift.tt/2iVG1EP line is, I don't launch any projects with ugly design.Tuesday Jan 10th: CopywritingYou have to write engaging content for your website. For the top section make sure the customer knows where you do business: Things like “Premier Maid Service in Los Angeles” or “You Deserve a clean home in Nevada”. You get the gist. The goal is casual and fun copywriting for the entire site. Watch this video on our copywriting efforts.Wednesday Jan 11th: Building TrustThere are few little things we want to incorporate, that this video covers. Trust is the currency of the internet. We can't build a successful company without certain trust factors on the site like human faces, trust icons, etc. Watch this video on how we build trust.Thursday Jan 12th: PricingWe’re going for simple online booking, that's one of our major competitive advantages, so keep in mind we have to have a pricing structure that works. Here’s something to read on pricing from the original case study. In this video we discuss how we figured out pricing.Friday Jan 13th: Building a form for hiringThe goal here is to throw up ads to find service providers and have them fill out a form on your website that you can then use to follow up. You can use something like www.groovehiring.com (my company) to have people apply on your website. You want to present a nice landing page that looks professional and groovehiring helps with that. This is what it looks like. Check this video out for some more info at the 1 minute mark.Saturday Jan 14th: Choosing the right peopleHow to choose the right folks on craigslist. Read this and for how to reward them, read this.Sunday Jan 15th: Chill out!Some good games on today if you're a football fan. Take it easy and rest your brain if you can. Next week we start to line things up for launch.Monday Jan 16th: Our Marketing ChannelsHere's our marketing Channels and how we’ll be making money. There are a ton of places to get customers and we'll show more in a few days, but for now, watch this video to start to get familiar with marketing channels.Tuesday Jan 17th: Adding a video to your websiteThis isn't necessary but it defintely helps you stand out. Watch this video of Dara creating her video for her website.Wednesday Jan 18th: Set up live chat and other ways to contact youSet up live chat (Tawk.to is free and great) and consider a popup to capture emails. We use phone.com for phones but there are plenty of tools out there. This vid has a bit on email capture.Thursday Jan 19th: ThumbtackWe're not launched yet but this will be important for us to figure out, out of the gate:Here's how to get clients on Thumbtack, and here is Dara’s first shot. It worked out in the end, but here’s how the first stab went for some real world angst.Friday Jan 20th: Thumbtack Day 2Thumbtack will be important for us for our early jobs, check out this video for more Thumbtack strategies.Saturday Jan 21st: Gift Cards, discount codes, etc.Gift cards, discount codes, and other ecommerce tools. Just familiarize yourself online with techniques ecommerce folks use to increase conversions and grow revenue using ecommerce tools. Everything here you’ll get from http://ift.tt/2hDAI7v Jan 22nd: CHILLAXTrump is now president, and Facebook is probably going crazy with memes and stories. You'll need this day. Trust me!Monday Jan 23rd: Get set up to take credit cardsSign up at stripe.com to get a stripe account. This will be the credit card processing company that allows your customers to book online with ease. We use stripe because it integrates perfectly with the booking form we'll be using.Tuesday Jan 24th: Sign up at Launch27 (Full disclosure: I’m an owner)This is going to be the software that runs the entire business, from booking form, to recurring bookings, to credit card integration, to customer database, the entire shebang. The booking form you get here you will add to your website with a simple copy and paste."Oh wait, so this is just selling shovels in a gold rush?" Yeah. A gold rush where I've already figured out how to pan the gold myself, made millions there, showed other people how to do it and a lot of them are making millions as well, and then 2 years later I created a shovel that simplifies the entire process. And in this gold rush, the gold just happens to be fairly predictable and easy to pan. :-)Wednesday Jan 25th to Sunday the 29thLast minute checks, launch27 integration, logo upload, business set up, contracts etc.Monday Jan 30th. Launch Day!This is 1 month from now. And that's how we build businesses. From idea to launch in 30 days. Watch this video for some tips on how we get our first customers. Cycle through this list as well, there are a ton of ways here that have been shown to be solid for getting clients.Yep, it’s hard.One month of hard work, but in 30 days you can start making money instead of dreaming about that fancy mobile app that you’ve been planning out for the last 2 years!COSTS: Domain: $10Hosting: $10 per monthTheme: $450 (website)Launch27: $59 per monthFrom here on out if you can budget $300 per month for marketing it would be a win. (That’s like eating out money and cable/cell phone bill )Core customers will come from: Yelp, Adwords (hire someone), Thumbtack, Craigslist, local seo, and others. Will come back on February 1st to continue this if enough folks give it a shot.BUILD SOMETHING IN 2017At the end of the day build something! If not this, find something else. But there's no excuse to be hanging out in r/entrepreneur for years without working on something.Makes no sense :-)Knowing you guys really well, I know there are a ton of excuses you've already created for why this won't work. I wrote this: The Top 12 Wantrepreneur excuses on how to get past them.Good luck and AMAP.S. Want to add this as someone said I make it sound too easy. Business is risky. Anyone that tells you otherwise has never started a business. It's incredibly difficult, subject to fail, will make you overweight sitting at a computer, will give you high blood pressure and anxiety if you're not careful, and it is incredibly difficult to find customers (and shoot sometimes even more difficult to have those customers pay you when you're done). Nothing about business is easy, otherwise EVERYBODY would be doing. It takes an almost insane person to take on trying to make it in the world with their own two hands and take on ALL the responsibility for the livelihoods of a lot of people. Just keeping it real! This is hard, but doable, because a ton of people have done it, but it's not for everyone by any means. Not everyone is cut out for entrepreneurship to begin with and certainly not everyone is cut out for local services and dealing with human beings. Good luck.Edited to add our FB group for ecommerce and FB group for local.

June 2023 Wrapup

June has ended, the time of Queer Pride is over, which means we resume our normally regular scheduled broadcast of Queer Wrath. Please do not adjust your set, we will continue to bang on pots and pans (both the metal object, and the people who are into lots of genders). Pride Month is the month where we party, the rest of the year is when we arm ourselves, you see.

But with that in mind, let’s check out a bunch of stuff I wrote and made this month and why you, you, you, might want to go back and read it, and see the cool things you missed!

Starting the month with our five game pile articles, threeeee of which were videos, we got:

Kings Quest I, a game commonly seen as the historical foundation of the narrative adventure game, and how its place in history is closer than you think it was.

I Was A Teenage Exocolonist, a truly amazing game designed, it seems to drill a hole in my skull and take up residence permanently.

Fallout New Vegas, and the question of why this game persists as a meme as a signifier of the trans community, specifically trans women

Girl By Moonlight, a Blades in the Dark hack that explores a genre that is mostly about women and tries to decouple it from the assumptions of Blades’ vision of Truama and how it changes you.

Playing With Tier Lists, where Fox and I talk about a bunch of characters for Pride Month that came out in 2022’s absolutely ridiculous anime seasons.

Then over in the Story Pile, we got:

Harrow the Ninth, the continued story of The Locked Tomb, and oh no I am going to be one of those people who just wants to recommend every book in this series aren’t I

Sword Art Online Alternate Gun Gale Story, a yuri series that also features a bunch of guns and a really insightful examination of the videogame structure of Sword Art Online

GGWP — Young Ladies Don’t Play Fighting Games, a manga about girls who want to do sick wavedashes as a metaphor for kissing

Call of The Night, a horny anime about a not-very-horny vampire, and the not-very-romantic boy who is trying to fall in love with her.

I wrote about the Hanamusa ship, which got attention from Kiana Mai, and therefore, it got fantastically large amounts of attention on tumblr. That was cool, that meant that there were people meaningfully engaging with the point of how Delia is a character you know can’t do some things, and you know that Jesse is a character who you know would do most things (that aren’t sensible).

I also wrote about queerness in D&D and my worldbuilding. I talked about how heterosexuality as a cultural frame has to be invented, and that means everyone in Cobrin’Seil exists at a level of background queerness we can’t. I talked about the forced gender locking of two different heritages in the 4e book Heroes of the Feywild, and the way that gender transition in 3rd edition was cheap enough to build infrastructures around.

The Story Piles were kinda overloaded this month – if I’d wanted to, I could probably have done nothing but anime for weeks! I summarised a bunch of queer anime that I didn’t really want to write about entirely as that. I also talked about the way that Wreck It Ralph echoes a story of a trans identity while trying to make that identity invisible. Then I got nostalgic about the woman who scared me about the sin of Pride because she was freaked out by a talking cat plush toy in a book for four year olds.

This month’s shirt design is a design that’s meant to evoke the Ulysses jacket from Fallout: New Vegas, which is a killer shirt design and I like it a lot. I might not buy it myself, because I am currently pretty poor, but that’s not the important thing. The important thing is filling my Redbubble store with stuff that makes me think: hey, I bet X would like this design.

I’m not always right but it’s what I’m trying.

If I could, I’d put this design on the back of a soft jacket. I don’t want it to be a hoodie, because the hood would hang over the top of the design, but maybe a long-sleeve shirt with this design on the back. Not sure.

At the start of this year in my journal I wrote this:

I want to do a better job of the things I know I care about.

Source more.

Plan ahead.

Double check.

Early bedtimes.

Permit softness.

This June, I knew I had some real bad days for early bedtimes. I got to bed at 5 AM one night because I was trying so hard to get marking done before a key date (which I messed up, hilariously, and had more time than I thought). Thing is, this is also a month where I was able to get myself to go to bed at 10 pm every day of the week until the weekend, and that’s good! That’s a really good difference in how I relate to sleep normally, especially since ‘get to bed at 10pm and then wake up at 7am’ is a great way to get more work done.

Elli also got more walks, more walks with both Fox and I together, that’s also great. He loves to walk in the sunshine. Bright, sunny days and he has this way of walking that I call ‘high steppin’, where he kind of struts and bounces as he walks, like he’s much more interested to look around than he is to snuffle around underneath the grass of things.

There was a big windstorm. There was Fox’s birthday, and my sister’s birthday. There was a lot of family stuff this month too. Bloodwork also got to take precedence – I was able to make sure I spent time on that, and time on my literature review.

I feel like I can do more. I want to do more. I want to do better.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

#Diary #Meta