so in an attempt to actually use positive thinking, anytime i fuck up and my brain reacts as if ive cause a minor apocalyptic event, i compare my fuck up to the 4 minute fuck up committed by the crew of the uss william d porter.

and only today, as i was having to explain what happened to my mom when i was explaining the whole comparison thing, did i realise that most people dont know about it and ive decided that needs to change because its objectively hilarious.

...which is a weird thing to say about an event that occured on a warship in 1943, specifically november 14th.

see the uss william d porter was a fletcher-class destroyer but you dont need to know what that means, just that she had guns that went bang bang and that she was escorting another ship, the uss iowa, to cairo.

while they were on their way there, they performed some gun trials like testing the anti-aircraft guns or the torpedos. and while they were running a torpedo drill, the crew of the porter managed to fire a live torpedo straight at the iowa which you know, in terms of a list of things to do while escorting a ship, shooting a torpedo at them is not on that list.

especially if the president of the united states is on board.

yeah so fdr was on board and the gun trials were actually his idea, and part of the trials was that they were conducted under radio silence.

and that means the crew of the porter couldnt just call the iowa to be like "move out the way, we accidentally shot a torpedo at you."

but they did have signal lamps and you know, the signalman on board was trained to signal this exact kind of message.

...and uh never mind, the signalman did manage to successfully tell the iowa that a torpedo was coming toward them but wasnt as successful when it came to the direction the torpedo was coming from.

not all hope is lost though because the signalman could still use the signal lamp to correct his previous mistake and-, never mind, he announced that the porter was reversing, which she wasnt.

yeah so at catastrophic mistake number 3, they broke radio silence to warn the iowa and she managed to turn out of the way just in time which meant no one got hurt. and even though the inquiry into the incident led to chief torpedoman (fantastic job title btw) lawton dawson being sentences to hard labour, fdr intervened and waved away his sentence, saying it was all an accident.

but yeah, so thats my new measure for "how much did i really fuck up?" and when i compared accidentally picking up a pencil case without a tag on it in wilko, turns out it was a very minor fuck-up. yes, the cashier had to ask another worker to grab a duplicate so they could scan the barcode, but i didnt nearly kill the president during wartime via accidental friendly fire

"What your favorite warship says about you" by History in the dark: link

I agree with his assessment.

Problematic Ship Tournament: Round 1, Match 7

USS William D. Porter: A World War II destroyer that gained infamy when it nearly torpedoed the USS Iowa, with President Franklin D. Roosevelt on board, during a drill. While no one was harmed, other ships would mock the incident by saying "Don't shoot, we're Republicans!" when hailing the ship.

SS Californian: A steam ship that was near the Titanic when it sank, it most likely saw the flares sent up from the sinking ship, but never moved to assist. Had they responded, they could have saved nearly every person on board.

TDIH: The Unlucky "Willie Dee"

On this day in 1943, a U.S. Navy destroyer accidentally torpedoes the battleship USS Iowa, then ferrying Franklin D. Roosevelt across the Atlantic. Perhaps you won’t be surprised to hear that this destroyer, USS William D. Porter, has been called “the unluckiest ship in US Navy history.”

Fortunately, everyone lived to tell the story.

Trouble began for the so-called “Willie Dee” during its first real mission. “The mishaps began as comedic scenes from Dumb and Dumber,” one historian writes dryly, “but evolved to the more serious.”

The destroyer had been assigned to accompany Iowa on a secret mission: The battleship was carrying Roosevelt and other officials across the Atlantic to meet with Winston Churchill and Joseph Stalin.

The story continues here: https://www.taraross.com/post/tdih-willie-dee-incident

#Repost @deptvetaffairs • • • • • • June 10-11, 1945-Medal of Honor awarded for actions taken-RICHARD MILES McCOOL, Lt., US Navy, USS LSC L3122-Off Okinawa. Citation: For conspicuous gallantry/intrepidity at the risk of his life above/beyond the call of duty as commanding officer of USS LSCL3122 during operations against enemy Japanese forces, Ryukyu chain. Sharply vigilant during hostile air raids against Allied ships on radar picket duty off Okinawa 10 June, Lt. McCool aided materially in evacuating all survivors from a sinking destroyer ... When his own craft was attacked simultaneously by 2 of the enemy’s suicide squadron on 11 June, he instantly hurled the full power of his gun batteries against the plunging aircraft, shooting down the 1st and damaging the 2nd before it crashed his station in the conning tower and engulfed the immediate area in a mass of flames. Although suffering shrapnel wounds and painful burns, he rallied his concussion-shocked crew-initiated vigorous firefighting measures and then proceeded to rescue several trapped in a blazing compartment, subsequently carrying 1 man to safety despite the excruciating pain of additional severe burns. Unmindful of all personal danger, he continued his efforts without respite until aid arrived from other ships and he was evacuated. By his staunch leadership, capable direction and indomitable determination throughout the crisis, Lt. McCool saved the lives of many who otherwise might have perished and contributed materially to the saving of his ship for further combat service. His valiant spirit of self-sacrifice in the face of extreme peril sustains and enhances the highest traditions of the US Naval Service. McCool served in the Korean and Vietnam Wars, and retired as captain after a 30-year career in 1974. He died at age 86 and is buried at the US Naval Academy, Annapolis, Md. Photos: R.Adm. Wm French, presents to Medal of Honor recipient, Capt. Richard McCool (ret.)-left, during a "Medal of Honor Flag" pres. ceremony, Dec 6, 2006. Navy photo-MssCmmSpc1stCl Hodges Pone III. Inset: 10 June 1945. USS William D. Porter sinking, McCool's LCSL3-122 is behind LCSL3-86, taking off her crew. Navy. https://www.instagram.com/p/Cer_hf-Lvgy/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Everyone circulates made-up anecdotes about USS William D. Porter to exaggerate her story, because almost sinking FDR by accident and then being sunk by a plane she already downed wasn’t enough, but nobody mentions the fact that the guy responsible for saving her crew was named McCool.

The USS William D. Porter, The Unluckiest Ship in the US Navy

from The History Guy: History Deserves to be Remembered

On this day, 75 years ago, President Roosevelt was on board the USS Iowa en route to Algeria (and eventually Cairo and then Teheran) when the antisubmarine USS William D. Porter reported that she had accidentally fired a torpedo in the IOWA's direction. 

From the Trip Log, November 14, 1943:

During the afternoon the Iowa exercised at air defense drill, simulating the repulse of an air attack from starboard. The President witnessed this exercise from the deck just outside his quarters (first superstructure deck, starboard side). Live ammunition was fired from a number of units of the ship’s anti-aircraft battery (5–inch, 40 m. m. and 20 m. m. guns) to demonstrate for the Commander-in-Chief what a veritable curtain of fire a ship of this type can offer as a “greeting” for enemy planes bent on attacking.

While the Iowa was exercising at this anti-aircraft drill, and during the lull after one round of the series of firings, a moment of extreme tension was brought on by an unexpected explosion, of an underwater nature, in the vicinity of the ship. This explosion was followed by the terse announcement, “This is not a drill.” All hands wondered, had we been attacked? This doubt was soon cleared when the William D. Porter, our antisubmarine screen to starboard, reported by visual dispatch that she had accidentally fired a torpedo in our direction. Fortunately the wake of the torpedo had been detected and reported by the Iowa’s lookouts in time for the Iowa to maneuver and to avoid being hit. During this maneuvering, the Iowa, within the period of but a very few minutes, built up her speed to 31 knots. The torpedo passed approximately 1,200 yards astern of the Iowa, moving at an estimated speed of 46 knots and at an estimated depth of 16 feet. The William D. Porter explained the accidental firing as probably caused by moisture from previous rough seas grounding the electrical circuit from the firing pin through the impulse case and igniting the black powder impulse charge. An investigation of this incident was immediately ordered by Admiral King, the Commander in Chief, U. S. Fleet, who was a passenger in the Iowa at the time.

Had that torpedo hit the Iowa in the right spot with her passenger list of distinguished statesmen, military, naval and aerial strategists and planners, it could have had untold effect on the outcome of the war and the destiny of our country. The William D. Porter’s ship’s company presumably did not know who rode the Iowa. During the afternoon Admiral McIntire and Lieutenant Commander Fox inspected the ship’s medical department and witnessed several major operations.

Photos from the National Archives: Series: Construction and Launching of Ships.

Эсминец ВМС США Porter – корабль, к счастью, не изменивший ход истории

По количеству разнообразных «неписаных правил», поверий и примет, включающих в себя, в том числе, немало запретов и «табу», кажущихся посторонним людям дичайшими предрассудками, моряки могут поспорить разве что с летчиками. Ну, что поделаешь – для людей, с давних пор привыкших вверять свою судьбу обстоятельствам, в которых огромную роль играет великое множество случаев и случайностей, подобное отношение к некоторым жизненным аспектам, пожалуй, закономерно. Да и не такими уж и «надуманными» оказываются иногда на поверку некоторые их «предрассудки»... Взять хотя бы твердую убежденность морских волков в том, что имя, данное кораблю при спуске на воду, может превратиться в истинное проклятие и для него самого, и для его экипажа. Да, да – то самое «как вы яхту назовете, так она и поплывет», которое моряки воспринимают вовсе не на уровне детской мультяшной песенки, а на самом полном серьезе. Что-то в этом однозначно есть – сомневающимся рекомендую поинтересоваться судьбой отечественных кораблей, имевших несчастье быть названными в честь адмирала Нахимова. Причем не только в военном, но и в гражданском флоте. Впрочем, сегодня у нас пойдет речь о кораблях американских – вернее, об одном из них, едва не переиначившем всю историю Второй мировой войны и ХХ столетия. И очень хорошо, что не переиначившем... Эсминцы «Портер» – совсем не славная «династия» Признаюсь честно – эта статья родилась, можно сказать, почти случайно. Просто интересуясь «славным боевым путем» ныне находящегося у всех на устах эсминца УРО ВМС США USS Porter (DDG-78), в последнее время нагло мозолящего глаза ракетчикам нашей береговой обороны и вообще демонстративно шляющегося по Черному морю с явно провокационными целями, я решил выяснить – а не было ли у этого корабля, так сказать, одноименного «предшественника»? Как оказалось – был! Да еще какой. Можно сказать, всем предшественникам предшественник. Эскадренный миноносец USS William D. Porter (DD-579) намертво впечатан в историю американского военного флота в качестве самого «невезучего», проблемного и нелепого корабля чуть ли не за все время существования «звездно-полосатых» ВМС. Сразу оговорюсь – упоминаемые мной эсминцы относятся к разным типам судов (нынешний принадлежит к серии «Арли Бёрк», а «исторический» – к представителям семейства «Флетчер»), да и названы они в честь разных Портеров. Современных – Дэвида Диксона, а бороздивший моря и океаны в годы Второй мировой – Уильяма Дэвида. Приходились эти Портеры друг другу родными братьями и, если верить всезнающей Википедии, «внесли выдающийся вклад в становление и развитие военного флота США». Это – что касается различий. А вот по поводу сходства... Тут аж жуть берет. Очень похоже на то, что Портер-«младшенький» сполна унаследовал от своего «однофамильца» бесподобную способность не просто влетать в неприятности, а попадать в ситуации, когда, что называется, на волоске повисают судьбы всего мира. Впрочем, не будем забегать наперед, и, прежде чем проводить параллели, ознакомимся подробно с историей невероятных приключений эскадренного миноносца USS William D. Porter. Право же, она того стоит. Построен этот корабль был в годы Второй мировой, можно сказать, самыми «стахановскими» темпами: заложили в мае 1942 года, в сентябре спустили на воду, а в июле 1943 года уже и полноценно ввели в эксплуатацию. Начало службы «новобранца» никакими особенными событиями не ознаменовалось – обычная флотская рутина, учения и боевое слаживание. Возможно, именно в силу того, что экипаж «Портера» просто не успел продемонстрировать командованию свои совершенно феноменальные способности, этому кораблю была доверена сверхважная и совершенно секретная миссия буквально через четыре месяца после того, как он «встал в строй». Надо полагать, что господа адмиралы пожалели об этом немедленно после того, как эсминец приступил к выполнению поставленной задачи – выход «Портера» из места дислокации, порта Норфолк, был воистину эпичным. Подумаешь, не подняли до конца якорь перед тем, как врубить «полный вперед»... Правда в результате такого своеобразного маневра якорная цепь торопыг косой прошлась по палубе и надстройкам на беду свою оказавшегося рядом такого же точно эсминца, сметая оттуда шлюпки, леера, спасплоты и все прочее оборудование, подвернувшееся по пути. Размах разрушений был не критичным, но и не мелким. Однако спешившему в открытое море «Портеру» преграждать путь для устройства «разб��рок» никто не стал. Самое милое, что с уходящего в закат корабля с ужасом разглядывавшим учиненный на их судне разгром коллегам просигналили что-то вроде: «Простите! Ошибочка вышла...» Ага: «Я больше не буду!» – «А больше и не надо!» Впрочем, экипажу «Портера» давать подобное опрометчивое обещание явно не следовало. Как показали последующие события – будут! И так будут, что мало никому не покажется. Убить президента? Да запросто! Тут самое время вспомнить о том, что же за архиважная миссия была доверена USS William D. Porter. Была она и вправду исторической – линкор Iowa на соединение, с которым шел эсминец, нес на своем борту президента США Франклина Делано Рузвельта, направлявшегося через Алжир и Египет в Тегеран, к месту первой встречи «Большой тройки», которой предстояло решить судьбу как Второй мировой войны, так и вопросы последующего мирового устройства. Корабли для этой, воистину неординарной миссии, судя по всему, подбирались по принципу: «чем новее, тем лучше». Делалось это в силу того, что конвою из линейного корабля и трех эскадренных миноносцев предстояло пересечь всю Атлантику и не стать при этом жертвами подводных охотников из Кригсмарине. Скорость и способность следовать к пункту назначения без остановок на ремонт ставились во главу угла. К примеру, линкор, ставший временной резиденцией не только для главы Белого дома, но и для множества высших военных и флотских чинов, вступил в строй всего за несколько месяцев до этого похода. Однако и он, и еще два эсминца укомплектованы были, судя по всему, более-менее опытными моряками. А вот экипаж «Портера», похоже, набирали даже не из портового сброда, а из числа пациентов ближайшей клиники для умалишенных. Казалось бы, после инцидента в Норфолке капитан должен был отдать команду по сто раз перепроверить все корабельное оборудование и вооружение, а дежурные смены гонять, что называется, до седьмого пота. Куда там! Эта гоп-компания показала, на что способна буквально в первый же день похода – 13 ноября 1943 года. Средь бела дня по ходу следования конвоя вдруг поднялся с грохотом «султан» белоснежной пены, сигнализирующий о мощном подводном взрыве. Немедленно была объявлена общая тревога, корабли принялись выполнять противолодочные маневры, а затем и сбрасывать глубинные бомбы, надеясь «прищучить» подкравшуюся незаметно немецкую субмарину. Да какие там немцы! Как оказалось, причиной ЧП послужило то, что волна смыла за борт «Портера» не закрепленную как положено глубинную бомбу. Да еще и находившуюся при этом, вопреки инструкциям и здравому смыслу, на боевом взводе. Грохнуло так знатно, что поднятым взрывом потоком воды захлестнуло один из паровых котлов самого незадачливого эсминца. Отстав из конвоя, экипаж «Портера» занялся срочным восстановлением нормального хода. Неизвестно, какие уж теплые и проникновенные слова нашел для своих мотористов и механиков капитан, но «Айову» «Портер» догнал довольно быстро. Вот только лучше б он этого не делал. На следующий же день присутствовавшие на линкоре флотские начальники решили поразвлечь президента проведением, так сказать, экспресс-маневров. Ну, ладно – демонстрация действий сил ПВ��, во время которой зенитные орудия били по выпущенным в качестве учебных целей воздушным шарам – это было еще куда не шло. Но вот имитация торпедной атаки, при которой роль объекта атаки играла как раз «Айова»... В принципе, ничего страшного произойти было не должно – выпускать смертоносные торпеды никто и в мыслях не имел. Для подстраховки на время подобных учений из торпедных аппаратов попросту вынимались вышибные заряды, отправляющие снаряд в цель. Делов-то. Однако все почему-то забыли, что среди участников действа находится беспримерный эсминец «Портер». Ну, вы, наверное, уже догадались. Тамошний торпедист почему-то не убрал заряд из одного аппарата. Забыл, наверное. Самое ужасное заключалось в том, что конвой изначально шел в условиях полнейшего радиомолчания. Капитан «Портера», леденея, смотрел, как самая настоящая боевая торпеда несется к борту линкора, на палубе которого со счастливой улыбкой играющего в войну мальчишки сидит в инвалидном кресле президент США... «Самый невезучий корабль» или самый безалаберный экипаж? Между прочим, согласно воспоминаниям современников, Рузвельт во время всего инцидента проявил невероятные самообладание и мужество – даже в те минуты, когда о летящей в борт «Айовы» смерти стало известно всем. Отчаявшись донести информацию с помощью световых и флажковых сигналов (тем более, что перепугавшийся до ступора сигнальщик семафорил черт-те что), капитан «Портера» плюнул на все приказы и вышел в эфир, вопя: «Лев, отверните вправо! Лев, торпеда в воде!» К счастью, у рулей линкора стояли профи, которым удалось выполнить необходимый маневр буквально в последние мгновения. Торпеда рванула в трех сотнях метров от «Айовы», охрана едва успела подхватить президента, чуть не вылетевшего из кресла. Впоследствии, когда военный суд «вкатает» за беспрецедентную халатность идиоту-торпедисту Доусону полновесные 14 лет на каторге, помилует недоумка лично Рузвельт. Истинно великие люди проявляют величие, прежде всего, в милосердии... Однако это будет потом. В первые минуты после инцидента шансы отправиться на дно морское были высоки для всего экипажа «Портера». А что вы хотите? Война все-таки – и торпедная атака на корабль с президентом. Можно только предположить, какие молитвы шептали матросы эсминца, видя, как линкор разворачивает в его сторону все до единой батареи своих монструозных орудий. Однако обошлось. Пронесло и впоследствии – когда весь экипаж «Портера», немедля изгнанного из конвоя и отправленного домой для разбирательства, был взят под стражу на Бермудах и подвергнут строжайшему дознанию. Как говорится, «не стоит искать злой умысел там, где все объясняется обычным раздолбайством». Правда, этот подход, на мой взгляд, не объясняет, почему капитан «Портера» Уилфред А. Уолтер не был подвергнут вообще никакому взысканию. И с должности не поперли, что характерно! Правда, при этом сумевший в кратчайший срок заработать самую дурную славу эсминец отправили куда подальше. То есть – на Тихий океан, где в тот момент шли жаркие бои с японцами. Да он там был и нужнее. Воевал «Портер» и его экипаж вроде бы вполне достойно, но в своем «фирменном стиле». Так, во время боев за Окинаву его зенитчики сбили пять японских самолетов и ... три американских. Вдобавок, несколько ранее эти же «снайперы» умудрились вместо вражеских бомбардировщиков врезать по эсминцу Luce, изрядно повредив его надстройки. По всей видимости, моряки эсминца были самыми горячими приверженцами принципа «Бей своих, чтоб чужие боялись!» Ну, и совсем уже вопиющий случай произошел прямо на месте стоянки «Портера», военной базе, расположенной на одном из Алеутских островов. Один из матросиков явился на борт из увольнительной в таком безобразно пьяном состоянии, что решил отметить это выдающееся событие выстрелом из орудия главного калибра. И выстрелили! Снаряд немалого калибра (127 мм) при этом угодил не абы куда, а прямехонько во двор коменданта базы, где в тот момент как раз проходила многолюдная вечеринка. Каким образом обошлось без жертв – совершеннейшая загадка. После этого все разговоры о том, что «Портер» был «самым невезучим кораблем ВМС США всех времен» звучат, согласитесь, не слишком уместно. Какое ж тут невезение?! Сплошные разгильдяйство, отсутствие дисциплины и отвратительная выучка личного состава. Единственное, что можно сказать в защиту USS William D. Porter, это то, что погиб он все-таки в бою. Правда, тоже как-то нелепо. Пораженный множество раз корабельными зенитчиками, бомбардировщик-камикадзе Aichi D3A в воду, конечно, рухнул. Но так «удачно», что и топливные баки, и бомбы его рванули в аккурат под днищем эсминца. Затонул корабль очень быстро. Правда, никто из экипажа в этой катастрофе не погиб. Сегодня сложно сказать, какие последствия могли бы наступить, достигни торпеда с «Портера» борта «Айовы» и приведи эта атака к гибели Рузвельта. Тегеранская встреча могла бы вообще не состояться. Или иметь совершенно иные последствия – не будем забывать, что окончательное решение об открытии «Второго фронта» упертый Черчилль принял как раз под давлением американского президента. Да и вообще из двух партнеров по «Большой тройке» он был для Советского Союза, пожалуй, более приемлемым, чем британский премьер. Впрочем, все это – лишь отвлеченные моменты. Отношение истории к сослагательному наклонению всем известно. Беспокоит другое – нынешний USS Porter слишком уж смахивает кое в чем на «тезку». Как минимум, одно нелепое столкновение (с японским нефтяным танкером Otowasan), случившееся в 2012 году в Персидском заливе, на его счету уже имеется. А что до обстрела Сирии «Томагавками», осуществлявшегося 7 апреля 2017 года как раз с этого корабля, то оно тоже вполне могло изменить историю – попади ракета-другая из шести десятков запущенных по территории наших военных объектов. К счастью, отстрелялся Porter с присущей ему «меткостью», отправив большую половину «Томагавков» неведомо куда. Однако нахождение этого далеко не славного корабля с явно просматривающейся «дурной наследственностью» у наших рубежей и вблизи Крыма как-то, знаете, напрягает. Убрали бы от греха подальше – а то ведь добром это все не закончится.

The USS William D. Porter: The Unluckiest Ship in WWII

https://www.usna63.org/tradition/sea_stories/Destroyer.html Comments

My Emmy’s 2018 Predictions

Below the cut are MY Emmy’s predictions.  These are not made to win anything, just what I hope to win.  I have another list of predictions on another site that are made to win LOL. If you use my list to make your predictions, TAG ME! I want to see who gets the most winners.  If you haven’t seen my blank copyable list of nominees, CLICK HERE!

Anyways, let’s get to what you actually want to see.  Click the Keep Reading to open my FULL LIST of my Emmy 2018 predictions, my choices are in bold.  HAPPY EMMY DAY!

COMEDY

Best Comedy Series “Atlanta” “Barry” “Black-ish” “Curb Your Enthusiasm” “GLOW” “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” “Silicon Valley” “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt”

Best Comedy Actor Anthony Anderson (“Black-ish”) Ted Danson (“The Good Place”) Larry David (“Curb Your Enthusiasm”) Donald Glover (“Atlanta”) Bill Hader (“Barry”) William H. Macy (“Shameless”)

Best Comedy Actress Pamela Adlon (“Better Things”) Rachel Brosnahan (“The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel”) Allison Janney (“Mom”) Issa Rae (“Insecure”) Tracee Ellis Ross (“Black-ish”) Lily Tomlin (“Grace and Frankie”)

Best Comedy Supporting Actor Louie Anderson (“Baskets”) Alec Baldwin (“Saturday Night Live”) Tituss Burgess (“Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt”) Tony Shalhoub (“The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel”) Kenan Thompson (“Saturday Night Live”) Henry Winkler (“Barry”)

Best Comedy Supporting Actress Zazie Beetz (“Atlanta”) Alex Borstein (“The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel”) Aidy Bryant (“Saturday Night Live”) Betty Gilpin (“GLOW”) Leslie Jones (“Saturday Night Live”) Kate McKinnon (“Saturday Night Live”) Laurie Metcalf (“Roseanne”) Megan Mullally (“Will and Grace”)

Best Comedy Directing “Atlanta” (Episode: “FUBU”), directed by Donald Glover “Atlanta” (Episode: “Teddy Perkins”), directed by Hiro Murai “Barry” (Episode: “Chapter One: Make Your Mark”), directed by Bill Hader “The Big Bang Theory” (Episode: “The Bow Tie Asymmetry”), directed by Mark Cendrowski “GLOW” (Episode: “Pilot”), directed by Jesse Peretz “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” (Episode: Pilot”), directed by Amy Sherman-Palladino “Silicon Valley” (Epiosde: “Initial Coin Offering”, directed by Mike Judge

Best Comedy Writing “Atlanta” (Episode: “Alligator Man”), written by Donald Glover “Atlanta” (Episode: “Barbershop”), written by Stefani Robinson “Barry” (Episode: “Chapter One: Make Your Mark”), written by Alec Berg and Bill Hader “Barry” (Episode: “Chatper Seven: Loud, Fast, and Keep Going), written by Liz Sarnoff “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” (Episode: “Pilot”), written by Amy Sherman-Palladino “Silicon Valley” (Episode: “Fifty-One Percent”), written by Alec Berg

DRAMA

Best Drama Series “The Handmaid’s Tale” “Game of Thrones” “This is Us” “The Crown” “The Americans” “Stranger Things” “Westworld”

Best Drama Actor Jason Bateman (“Ozark”) Sterling K. Brown (“This is Us”) Ed Harris (“Westworld”) Matthew Rhys (“The Americans”) Milo Ventimiglia, (“This is Us”) Jeffrey Wright (“Westworld”)

Best Drama Actress Claire Foy (“The Crown”) Tatiana Maslany (“Orphan Black”) Elisabeth Moss (“The Handmaid’s Tale”) Sandra Oh (“Killing Eve”) Keri Russell (“The Americans”) Evan Rachel Wood (“Westworld”)

Best Drama Supporting Actor Nikolaj Coster-Waldau (“Game of Thrones”) Peter Dinklage (“Game of Thrones”) Joseph Fiennes (“The Handmaid’s Tale”) David Harbour (“Stranger Things”) Mandy Patinkin (“Homeland”) Matt Smith (“The Crown”)

Best Drama Supporting Actress Alexis Bledel (“The Handmaid’s Tale”) Millie Bobby Brown (“Stranger Things”) Ann Dowd (“The Handmaid’s Tale”) Lena Headey (“Game of Thrones”) Vanessa Kirby (“The Crown”) Thandie Newton (“Westworld”) Yvonne Strahovski (“The Handmaid’s Tale”)

Best Drama Directing “The Crown” (Episode: “Paterfamilias”), directed by Stephen Daldry “Game of Thrones” (Episode: “Beyond the Wall”), directed by Alan Taylor “Game of Thrones” (Episode: “The Dragon and the Wolf”), directed by Jeremy Podeswa “The Handmaid’s Tale” (Episode: “After”), directed by Kari Skogland “Ozark” (Episode: “The Toll”), directed by Jason Bateman “Ozark” (Episode: “Tonight We Improvise”), directed by Daniel Sackheim “Stranger Things” (Episode: “Chapter Nine: The Gate”), directed by the Duffer Brothers

Best Drama Writing “The Americans” (Episode: “START”), written by Joel Fields and Joe Weisberg “The Crown” (Episode: “Mystery Man”), written by Peter Morgan “Game of Thrones” (Episode: “The Dragon and the Wolf”), written by David Benioff and D. B. Weiss “The Handmaid’s Tale” (Episode: “June”), written by Bruce Miller “Killing Eve” (Episode: “Nice Face”), written by Phoebe Waller-Bridge “Stranger Things” (Episode: “Chapter Nine: The Gate”), written by the Duffer Brothers

MOVIE/MINI

Best Limited Series “The Alienist” “The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story” “Genius: Picasso” “Godless” “Patrick Melrose”

Best TV Movie “Fahrenheit 451” “Flint” “Paterno” “The Tale” “USS Callister: Black Mirror”

Best Movie/Mini Actor Antonio Banderas (“Genius: Picasso”) Darren Criss (“The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story”) Benedict Cumberbatch (“Patrick Melrose”) Jeff Daniels (“The Looming Tower”) John Legend (“Jesus Christ Superstar”) Jesse Plemons (“USS Callister: Black Mirror”)

Best Movie/Mini Actress Laura Dern (“The Tale”) Jessica Biel (“The Sinner”) Michelle Dockery (“Godless”) Edie Falco (“The Menendez Murders”) Regina King (“Seven Seconds”) Sarah Paulson (“American Horror Story: Cult”)

Best Movie/Mini Supporting Actor Jeff Daniels (“Godless”) Brandon Victor Dixon (“Jesus Christ Superstar”) John Leguizamo (“Waco”) Ricky Martin (“The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story”) Edgar Ramirez (“The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story”) Michael Stuhlbarg (“The Looming Tower”) Finn Wittrock (“The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story”)

Best Movie/Mini Supporting Actress Sara Bareilles (“Jesus Christ Superstar Live In Concert”) Penelope Cruz (“The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story”) Judith Light (“The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story”) Adina Porter (“American Horror Story: Cult”) Merritt Wever (“Godless”) Letitia Wright (“Black Museum: Black Mirror”)

Best Movie/Mini Directing “The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story” (Episode: “The Man Who Would Be Vogue”), directed by Ryan Murphy “Godless,” directed by Scott Frank “Jesus Christ Superstar Live in Concert,” directed by David Leveaux and Alex Rudzinski “The Looming Tower” (Episode: “9/11”), directed by Craig Zisk “Paterno,” directed by Barry Levinson “Patrick Melrose,” directed by Edward Berger “Twin Peaks,” directed by David Lynch

Best Movie/Mini Writing “American Vandal” (Episode: “Clean Up”), written by Kevin McManus and Matthew McManus “The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story” (Episode: “House by the Lake”), written by Tom Rob Smith “Black Mirror: USS Callister,” written by William Bridges and Charlie Brooker “Godless,” written by Scott Frank “Patrick Melrose,” written by David Nicholls “Twin Peaks,” written by Mark Frost and David Lynch

REALITY/VARIETY

Best Reality Competition Program The Amazing Race” “American Ninja Warrior” “Project Runway” “RuPaul’s Drag Race” “Top Chef” “The Voice”

Best Variety Sketch Series “At Home with Amy Sedaris” “Drunk History” “I Love You, America” “Portlandia” “Saturday Night Live” “Tracey Ullman’s Show”

Best Variety Talk Series “The Daily Show With Trevor Noah” “Full Frontal With Samantha Bee” “Jimmy Kimmel Live” “Last Week Tonight with John Oliver” “Late Late Show with James Corden Late Show with Stephen Colbert”

Best Variety Special, Directing “Dave Chappelle: Equanimity,” directed by Stan Lathan “Jerry Seinfeld: Jerry Before Seinfeld,” directed by Michael Bonfiglio “Steve Martin & Martin Short: An Evening You Will Forget For The Rest Of Your Life,” directed by Marcus Raboy “Super Bowl LII Halftime Show Starring Justin Timberlake,” directed by Hamish Hamilton “The Oscars,” directed by Glenn Weiss

Best Variety Special, Writing “Full Frontal with Samantha Bee: The Great American* Puerto Rico (*It’s Complicated),” written by Samantha Bee, Pat Cassels, Mike Drucker, Eric Drysdale, Mathan Erhardt, Miles Kahn and Nicole Silverberg “John Mulaney: Kid Gorgeous” at Radio City, written by John Mulaney “Michelle Wolf: Nice Lady,” written by Michelle Wolf “Patton Oswalt: Annihilation,” written by Patton Oswalt “Steve Martin & Martin Short: An Evening You Will Forget for the Rest of Your Life,” written by Steve Martin and Martin Short

How do you feel about the USS William D. Porter? I love the stories but so many of them seem apocryphal at best, there's so many variations

A lot of it can be vouched for, for example, in this article.

https://web.archive.org/web/20080612075327/http://www.ussiowa.org/general/html/willie_d.htm 

Though DANFS has a tendency to be inaccurate due to time passing, it is always a credible source. 

https://www.history.navy.mil/research/histories/ship-histories/danfs/w/william-d-porter.html

The Curious Tale of an Extremely Jinxed Ship – The USS William D. Porter (DD-579) http://dlvr.it/Q6Xcrq

THESE are their names:

From the official casualty report

LIST OF PERSONNEL LOST WHEN THE DESTROYER USS REUBEN JAMES (DD-245) WAS TORPEDOED AND SUNK BY GERMAN SUBMARINE U-552 ON OCTOBER 31, 1941:

Lieutenant Commander Heywood Lane Edwards, U.S. Navy (Commanding) Lieutenant Benjamin Ghetzler, U.S. Navy. Lieutenant Dewey George Johnston, U.S. Navy Lieutenant (junior grade) John Justus Daub, U.S. Navy. Lieutenant James Mead Belden, D-V (G), U.S. Naval Reserve. Ensign Craig Spowers, U.S. Navy. Ensign Howard Voyer Wade, D-V (G), U.S. Naval Reserve.

BAUER, John Francis, Jr., Chief Radioman (AA) Class V-3, U.S. Naval Reserve. BEASLEY, Harold Hamner, Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. BENSON, James Franklin, Machinist's Mate second class, U.S. Navy. BIEHL, Joseph Peter, Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. BOYNTON, Paul Rogers, Yeomman first class, U.S. Navy. BRITT, Harold Lelie, Coxswain, U.S. Navy. BURRELL, Herbert Ralph, Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. BYRD, Hartwell Lee, Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. CARBAUGH, Leftwich Erastus, Jr., Fireman first class, U.S. Navy. VARUSO, Joseph James, Radioman second class, U.S. Navy. CLARK, James Brantley, Fire Controlman second class, U.S. Navy. COOK, Raymond, Mess Attendant first class, U.S. Navy. COOPERRIDER, Carl Eugene, Gunner's Mate third class, U.S. Navy. COSGROVE, Lawrence Randall, Gunner's Mate second class, U.S. Navy. COUSINS, Alton Adelbert, Cheif Machinist's Mate (PA), U.S.N.R., Class F-4-C COX, Charles Beacon, Chief Torpedoman (AA), U.S. Navy. DANIEL, Dennis Howard, Yeoman third class, U.S. Navy. DEVEREAU, Lawrence Delaney, Chief Boatswain's Mate (PA), U.S.N.R., Class F-4-D DICKERSON, Leonidas Camden, Jr., Storekeeper third class, U.S. Navy. DOIRON, GIlbert Joseph, Water Tender first class, U.S. Navy. DRINKWALTER, Karl Lee, Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. DUNSTON, Nebraska, Mess Attennndant third class, U.S. Navy. DYSON, Corbon, Radioman third class, U.S. Navy. EVANS, Gene Guy, Boilermaker second class, U.S. Navy. EVANS, Linn Stewart, Fire Controlman third class, U.S. Navy. EVERETT, Carlyle Chester, Fireman second class, U.S. Navy. FARLEY, Edwin Louis, Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. FITZGERALD, John Joseph, Quartermaster third class, U.S. Navy. FLYNN, William Aloysius, Torpedoman second class, U.S. Navy. FRANKS, Hartley Hardy, Ship's Cook second class, U.S. Navy. FRENCH, Ralph George, Chief Commissary Steward, U.S. Navy. GASKINS, Lester Carson, Machinist's Mate first class, U.S. Navy. GREER, John Calvin, Chief Electrician's Mate (PA), U.S. Navy. GREY, Ernest Dwane, Jr., Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. GRIFFIN, Arthur Raymond, Signalman second class, U.S. Navy. GUNN, Donald Knapp , Seaman second class, U.S. Navy.  HARRIS, Charles Waldon, Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. HAYES, Charles Chester, Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. HENNIGER, William Henry, Gunner's Mate first class, U.S. Navy. HOGAN, Francis Robert, Gunners' Mate third class, U.S. Navy. HOUSE, Hugh, Gunner's Mate third class, U.S. Navy. HUDLIN, Maurice Woodrow, Fireman first class, U.S. Navy. JOHNSON, Joseph, Mess Attendant first class, U.S. Navy. JONES, Glen W., Chief Quartermaster (PA), U.S. Navy. KALANTA, ANthony J., Boatswain's Mate second class, U.S. Navy. KEEVER, Leonard A., Chief Machinist's Mate (PA), U.S. Naval Reserve, F-4-C KLOEPPER, Ralph W.H., Signalman third class, Class V-3, U.S. Naval Reserve. LITTLE, Joseph Gustave, Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. MAGARIS, Paul L., Radioman first class, U.S. Navy. MC KEEVER, William James, Sean second class, U.S. Navy. MERRELL, Windell Harmon, Fireman second class, U.S. Navy. MERRITT, Auburn F., Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. MILLS, Gerald Edward, Seaman second class, Class V-1, U.S. Naval Reserve. MONDOUK, Albert J., Chief Water Tender (PA), U.S. Naval Reserve, Class F-4-C. MUSSLEWHITE, Edgar W., Machinist's Mate first class, U.S. Navy. NEELY, Kenneth Cecil, Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. NEPTUNE, Aldon W., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. NEWTON, William Harding, Yeoman third class, U.S. Navy. ORANGE, Harold J., Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. ORTIZUELA, Pedro, Officer's Cook first class, U.S. Navy. OWEN, Benjamin T., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. PAINTER, William H., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. PARKIN, Joseph J., Chief Water Tender (PA), U.S. Navy. PATERSON, William N., Coxswain, U.S. Navy. PENNINGTON, BUrl G., Quartermaster second class, U.S. Navy. POLIZZI, Joseph C., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. PORTER, Corwin D., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. POST, Frederick R., Boatswain's Mate first class, U.S. Navy. POWELL, Lee P., Pharmacist's Mate first class, U.S. Navy. RAYHILL, Elmer R., Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. REID, Lee Louis N., Torpedoman first class, Class V-6, U.S. Naval Reserve. RESS, John R., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. ROGERS, James W., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. RYAN, John J., Jr., Coxswain, U.S. Navy. RYGWELSKI, Clarence, Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. SALTIS, Edward Peter, Boatswain's Mate first class, U.S. Navy. SCHLOTTHAUER, Eugene, Chief Water Tender (AA), U.S. Navy. SETTLE, Sunny J., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. SORENSEN, Walter, Gunner's Mate third class, U.S. Navy. SOWERS, Wallace L., Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. STANKUS, Anthony Gedminus, Seaman second class, U.S. Navy. STELMACH, Jerome, Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. TAYLOR, Wilton L., Fireman first class, U.S. Navy. TOWERS, George F., Chief Gunner's Mate (AA), U.S. Navy. TURNER, Lewis Aubrey, Signalman third class, U.S. Navy VOILES, Loyd Z., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. VORE, Harold M., Fireman first class, U.S. Navy. WEAVER, Jesse, Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. WELCH, Chester L., Fireman second class, U.S. Navy. WHARTON, Kenneth R., Fire Controlman first class, U.S. Naval Reserve, Class F-4-C. WOODY, George, Jr., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy. WRAY, Edwin E., Seaman first class, U.S. Navy.

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(( 1. i really have no idea, 2. green or purple, especially when they're sparkly!! 3. the uss william d porter (or the hybird + large flock of bird pokemon who adopt him and nurse him back to happiness.. i don't really like romantic/sexual ships i much prefer found family..). 4. kawartha dairies moose tracks, or their raspberry white chocolate swirly one, or pralines and cream.. or their vanilla... pretty much any of their ice creams except chocolate peanut butter which everyone in my family

thinks i like for some reason??. 5. that depends, do you consider a bright pink plush owl like creature to be a cat? i named her thea. she seems cat like to me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ))

Getting to Know You! (no longer accepting) 

1) You are a friend. A good friend who is incredibly multi-talented and who deserves love. 

2) Both are good. Sparkle makes them better, especially purple.

3) I just went to go read on this ship, and it sounds very...unfortunate. Also the primer thing is probably a mistake I would make so...

4) There isn’t much to say to this except ice cream is good

5) Sure let’s call her a cat Thea sounds like a good friend