#this is an angsty story and im not sorry ab it :) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

iikatsukii · 1 year

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Too Late.

synopsis: they loved you when it was too late.

pairings: sully family x daughter/sister!reader, neteyam x twin!reader, neytiri x daughter! Reader, jake x daughter!reader

warnings: mentions of death, attempted suicide, suicidal thoughts(?), swearing, familial issues.

word count: 3.6k

a/n: would yall believe me if i said i wrote this while listening to pussy talk by city girls LMFAOOOOO p.s. Happy valentines day (THE RED TEXT IS "FESTIVE" im trynna get into the valentines day spirit :D). I wish i could've given yall part two of illicit love instead of this but i'm not done with it </3. ALMOST THO!!! (gif creds: @world-of-pandora)

(p.s. part two is out now!!)

it was never supposed to end like this. jake's mouth felt bitter. his whole body shook as he let out the most heart-stopping scream when his eyes landed on his eldest daughter. you, neteyam's twin, lay lifeless in his arms. your father cried because he never got to tell you he was proud of you, or that he loved you, or that you didn't need to compare to your brother to still be considered his baby girl.

it wasn't always like this, though.

you and neteyam were always happy and playing around together when you were younger. still, as you two grew older, neteyam took on olo'eyktan training and became his father's perfect warrior. where does that leave you? mo'at had chosen kiri to pursue tsahik training because of her apparent connection to eywa. so where does that leave you? lo'ak took on the role of the troublemaker, and tuk, of course, is just the baby of the family. so where does that leave you?

you're lo'ak's babysitter. making sure the boy doesn't get into trouble, but with your lack of training due to your father training your brother more than you, you weren't really the best babysitter. honestly, it was more lo'ak protecting than you protecting him. he kept you from losing balance while in high places, saved you when you fell into the rapids and flew you home when you forgot your way as if you had not lived in this forest your whole life.

you felt like a burden on your family.

nothing you ever did was right.

you went hunting? cool, but you didn't bring back enough for the whole family, so now neteyam and lo'ak have to go out and find more food for everyone else.

you bead a necklace for your friend? great, but you messed up the pattern she asked for, so she brought it to kiri so she could remake it.

tuk wanted to go play with you? of course! but now she has a sprained ankle from falling into the river while you were looking at flowers a few feet away.

and every time, somehow, some way, your family always managed to say something that felt like a blade stabbed through your heart.

"next time, y/n, just leave the hunting to neteyam and i. at least we know the right amount to bring back." it was lo'ak before he and your twin had to go hunting for more food for dinner a few weeks ago.

"you know, sister, your jewelry hasn't been the same recently. i've had sooo many of your friends coming back to me saying you messed up the pattern they asked for. just try and pay more attention when you're beading." kiri said as you walked into your home. she was re-beading the necklace you gave to your best friend yesterday.

the one she told you was perfect and that she loved it.

"how could you leave your sister unattended like that y/n she could've been killed?! why can't you be like neteyam? you’re twins, for crying out loud, y/n. do you not care for your sister's well-being?" your father scolded you outside your grandmother's hut. you could hear her cries inside the tent, along with your mother's gentle words of comfort, as she tried to calm her youngest daughter down.

you were being compared to your twin for the millionth time in your life, and as used to this as you should be, it still hurt just as bad as the first time your father had said it.

"she only sprained her ankle. it was an accident sempu–" you tried to defend yourself, but you were cut off.

"NO. it is, sir. do you understand me?" jake yelled at you. in your 18 years, your father had never raised his voice at you, let alone for you calling him 'sempu.' he used to love it when you called him because you were his ite and he was your sempu. but right now, to him, you were just someone who had hurt his child and nothing more than that. you hang your head, eyes falling to the floor in front of you as you didn't want your father to see you cry.

"sorry, sir." was all you said before walking away. you don't know where you walked, but you found yourself at the abandoned shack. you knew this area was forbidden, so when you realized where you were, you immediately crouched. you were just gonna walk back because your father would kill you if he found out you were over here, but then you heard voices. you looked through the bush to see a group of 3 or 4 avatars. you knew you couldn't escape now, so you pressed on the collar of your neck.

"sempu– sorry. sir, i need help, i wasn't paying attention to where i was walking, and i can hear avatars speaking english and–" your father cut you off.

"where are you?" he, your mother, and your two brothers were patrolling around your land's territories when they heard you through their earpieces.

you let out a heavy sigh, praying to eywa that he wouldn't chew your ass up for being here, before pressing the button again and saying,

"i'm at the abandoned shac–AHH! OWW, LET GO, YOU ASSHOLE!!" you couldn't finish as one of the avatars found your hiding spot, grabbing you by your queue.

thankfully your family had heard enough. your twin telling his father he knew a shortcut, they all flew as fast as they could to you. honestly, this was their last straw. everyone was fed up with you constantly making things hard for everyone.

your mother, though, was worried. you were caught by those skydemons all by yourself. who knew what they would do to you?

as you waited for your family, you were roughly held by your queue as they poked and prodded at you like they had never seen a native before.

"let me see your hands." the man with a buzzcut spoke.

"why don't you look at my feet instead?" you said. they all gave you a confused look until you kicked quaritch right in his face. you don't know how, but it caused the avatar behind you to loosen his grip, so you tried to make a break for it.

unluckily for you, the female avatar grabbed your arm, pulling you back into her form. she gripped you by your neck, unaware that she had pressed the button on your communicator. you hissed at her. the man you had kicked was only laughing as he wiped the blood dripping from his nose. "she must be one of his. she's defiant. grab her hands, let me see." he said

the avatar behind you grabbed your hands, holding them both out.

"hm… four fingers. maybe she's not one of his." were they gonna let you go? wishful thinking.

"fine. she may not be one of his but if one of their people go missing they're bound to come for her. keep her." his words made your heart sank. were they gonna take you? away from everything? your home? your family? if you could even call it that.

but then you thought about it. you really can't call it that. you don't remember the last happy memory you had with someone, anyone, in your family. it clicked to you that it had been about 10 minutes since you had radioed your father, and he wasn't here yet. were they even coming for you? you knew it was a stupid question. they weren't coming for you. why would they when this was the easiest way to get rid of the weak link of the family? it's not like your blood would be on their hands, and their life would be way better without you.

"they're not gonna come for me. i have no family. you killed my family in the last war, you dickhead." you lied to the man you had kicked earlier.

hearing you say this confused your family. what were you talking about?

"dammit you're an orphan? i didn't know the na'vi had any of those. then what do we do with her. she's useless. nobody will notice she's gone." the woman behind you asked her superior.

"hmm.. i have a better idea. kill her. use her as a warning to the sullys. this is what we're capable of now. it'll be a threat. give us jake sully and nobody else will die. but this one… this one is our lab rat. we're gonna make you bleed out nice and slow little one." he said as he grabbed his pistol off his waist, pressing it below your jaw. the nickname made you internally gag, but you held your ground.

these people had no real idea how tired you really were. you were exhausted. you were ready for life with eywa. you wanted your deity to hold you close, keep you warm, and protect you from the harsh real world. the world that your parents didn't adequately prepare you for. the world that you were ready to leave.

"kill me," you said as you grabbed quaritch's wrist and moved his gun from under your jaw to right above your heart. "and make it quick. nobody will come for me anyways," you said in a monotone voice.

the avatars all looked at you in awe. they had never once seen a na'vi so willing to give up their life. the natives they had all met were vicious, hissing and armed, always ready to kill. but you. you were the opposite.

you were fed up and ready to die. but not for your people. for your own inner peace.

"no," quaritch said, putting his gun down. that shocked everyone. like he shocked his soldiers and your family, who had been listening the whole time. they were trying to get to you as fast as possible.

hearing how you really felt was a wake-up call for your family. and when they heard bullets moving within the chamber of quaritch's pistol, they all flew their ikrans as fast as possible, weaving through trees and around mountains, trying to get to you.

you looked at the man like he had just betrayed you.

"DO IT, YOU COWARD! FUCKING DO IT! NOBODY WILL COME FOR ME!! THEY DON'T CARE!! THEY DON'T FUCKING CARE!!" you don't know what came over you, but you tried to wrestle quaritch's pistol out of his hands. your family was only 2 clicks away and could hear you struggling. everyone landed at the same time. the sullys, excluding tuk and kiri, who had stayed with mo'at, caught quaritch's attention, which distracted him enough for you to pull the gun from his grip.

you distanced yourself from everyone, and looking around, you realized you were surrounded by everyone. your family and these random avatar people. everyone could read you. you were a ticking time bomb and the only person in control of the trigger was you. one of the avatars took a step forward slowly, but you saw him move and point the gun at him. it didn't stop him from moving, but you heard screams of protest when you pointed the gun at your own head. that's when everyone froze. the avatars. your family. nature. time. eywa. you. everything was frozen.

"babygirl…" the nickname made you snap your neck to the man who was the root of your problems.

"NO! no, you do not get to call me that. if i can't call you ma sempu, don't bother referring to me as your daughter." you said. your energy was depleted, and you knew you would only be able to stand here for a couple more minutes before you opened your own doors and walked to your great-mother. jake tried to take a step closer to you, which only caused you to tense up and pull on the trigger a little bit. everyone immediately backed up, your mother hissing at you through her tears. "MA ITE, PUT THE GUN DOWN," she screamed at you.

"sa'nok…" you whimpered, not even being able to look her in the eyes.

"sa'nu… i can't" you sobbed. you could barely breathe and your tears were coming down in waterfalls at this point. you couldn't see anything clearly. your tears had blurred your vision.

you knew your mom loved you. she and tuk were the only ones in the family who had never uttered a harsh word in your direction. though she was busy taking care of tuk, so it wasn't like you got much attention from them either. but there's no way you would blame her or tuk for that. if anything, you're sorry that you have to leave them, but this world isn't for you. you turned on your heels, looking at the man whose gun you took.

"you are a coward. you should've pulled the goddamn trigger. you're fucking pathetic. are you happy now? now everyone here gets to experience what they've waited so long for." nobody had ever heard you speak to anyone like that. honestly, they couldn't tell if your words were directed at quaritch or yourself.

you inhaled, looking up at the eclipse, your bioluminescent freckles glowing brighter than they ever had in the nighttime as tears cascaded down your face.

"goodbye," you said as you squeezed the trigger, hearing a loud bang and tons of screaming. you felt no pain, though. you opened your eyes, not realizing you had closed them, and looked around. you noticed your pistol was stuck in the tree in front of you with an arrow clean through it. you turned to your twin with hate in your eyes. he lowered his bow as he read your expression.

"now you wanna save me?" your voice was weak but filled with venom.

"why didn't you save me when you noticed i stopped hanging out with you guys? hm? why didn't you teach me when i was younger? huh? why didn't you talk to me other than when you were chewing my ass out for something that was A FUCKING ACCIDENT, GODAMMIT. WHY?!" you felt like your tears were endless.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU LOVE ME?! ANSWER ME YOU FUCKERS!! WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?!" you screamed your frustrations at your father and brothers. none of them could look you in your eyes, save for your mother. "you only want to save me because you know how much i don't want to be saved anymore but it's too goddamn late," you said.

you turned to the female avatar who was holding you from before. you noticed her gun earlier and hoped you looked threatening enough for her to use it as you ran in her direction. she didn't know what to do. she didn't know you were a barely trained warrior or that you wouldn't have put a scratch on her. she didn't know you were harmless. all she knew was that you were a native, and the natives were hostile.

so she pulled her gun out and fired two shots into your chest.

the momentum of the bullet was enough to stop you from running. you felt the searing pain start to blossom in your chest area. falling to your knees, your eyes met the woman who had shot you. you looked at her shirt, reading her name. it was a funny name to you, but you didn't care. she had fulfilled your wish without even knowing it. so you used your last breath to speak.

"thank you, z-dog" you slumped over on your side, as everything started to go slow. your vision was starting to darken, and you let it consume you, not wanting to fight for your life anymore.

cue the screams and cries from your family and the fleeing steps of the rda soldiers. your chest stopped rising and falling, and your breathing had ceased. your family surrounded your body, trying to stop your bleeding and preserve the life that had already left your body. still, you had been shot twice, and both bullets had exit wounds. it was no use. nearby, na'vi had heard the screams of distress and had called over some hunters and scouts to investigate the scene since they knew the area was near the forbidden old shack.

the hunters and scouts arrived at the scene armed and ready to defend their people, but what they were met with was the last thing they expected to see. the eldest sully daughter was lying on the floor, motionless, with two bullet holes in her chest and her blood sinking into the forest floor. her family leaned over her body, screaming and crying for her to be okay and to return to them. they whispered how sorry they were. they whispered to her how if she came back, they would treat her right, teach her, hang out with her, and love her like they were supposed to. but it's too late.

nobody knew how to react. the eldest sully daughter had died, and nobody but her family knew what had happened.

“ma ite, oel ngati kameie. i see you. i'm sorry, i'm so so sorry. you don't have to be your brother. being you was just fine." your father cried as he cradled your head. brushing your hair away from your face, getting blood on your cheek since his hands were covered in it.

neteyam and lo'ak were each holding one of your hands. they cried as they watched their tears pool in your palm and then fall off the edge to drip into the soil below your body. they couldn't believe they treated you like anything less than their sister. they treated you like you were a stranger, a burden to deal with. and now that you were gone, they could not tell you how sorry they were for how they treated you.

neytiri was inconsolable. her firstborn daughter had just died in front of her eyes. willingly. she wanted this. her own daughter wanted to take her life. and she couldn't do anything to stop it. how could she not know? how did you go 18 years hurting in silence? how did she not know you needed to be saved?

"ma ite. my baby. ma y/n." neytiri's heart shattered when she saw those bullets go through your chest. she cried over your body for what felt like hours, but it was only a few minutes until the male healers came so they could carry you to the healing tents to prepare you for your burial ritual.

as jake pulled his mate from your body, she started to push against him trying to get him to let go of her so she could return to her daughter.

eventually, jake lets go, unable to keep his mate from her child. he joined her and just asked the healers to give your family a minute with you.

they just nodded in understanding, leaving your family to grieve.

two pairs of footsteps rushed towards the clearing, where the family mourned one of their own.

kiri and tuk had heard the news and came as fast as they could. tuk screamed, running up to you and curling herself into your chest as she sobbed into your neck. she didn't care if she was getting blood all over herself. you were her older sister, and she didn't even get to say goodbye. she felt nothing but sadness and loss. tuk felt terrible because the last time she had seen you was earlier when you brought her back from the stream because she had sprained your ankle. and now you were lying on the forest floor dead? how did this happen?

"HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?! SISTER, PLEASE!!" kiri begged you to wake up as she placed herself where her father was earlier. she rested your head in her lap, looking into your lifeless yellow eyes. you were her elder sister. as much as you didn't know, kiri looked up to you. she knew how hard you tried for the family, and though it wasn't your fault that you would mess up a necklace every once and a while, she couldn't help but feel guilty for the words she said to you in those moments. she knew she could've should've been nicer about it.

when it was finally time for the healers to take your body, once again, neytiri tried to fight against them. this time everyone in the family had to hold her back as the healer walked you away in a leaf big enough to cover your entire body from the eyes of those around you. once you were gone from her view, neytiri fell to the floor again, sobbing into the ground,

"GREAT MOTHER, WHY?!!" their mother's screams felt like a knife in their hearts. the sully family felt nothing but guilt and grief upon your death. nobody got closure because there is no closure for this kind of thing. they were the reason you wanted to die, and now that you got what you wanted, they had to live with that guilt.

you were high in being held in eywa's embrace as you cried. looking down on your family. you did not regret your decision, but you just had one question for your deity.

"did they really love me, great mother." eywa heaved a sigh before answering you.

"my ite, your mother and youngest sister loved you everyday, they were just very poor at showing it i'm afraid." you nodded your head, asking a follow-up question,

"what about the others?" you knew by her face that you wouldn't like the answer, but it was too late. the question was asked. and the answer is precisely the reason why you did what you did.

"they loved you just a little bit too late, my child."

#avatar x reader #avatar the way of water #avatar wotw #avatar 2 #avatar #sully family x reader #jake sully x daughter!reader #neytiri x daughter!reader #neteyam x twin!reader #sully family angst #jake sully angst #neteyam angst #this is an angsty story and im not sorry ab it :)#happy valentine's day #neytiri sully #best mom neytiri #i love her #neytiri be my mom pls

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rosyjn · 7 months

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jake sully masterlist

MDNI, adult works on here.

-wax play, avatar mating season day ??

-aftercare, avatar mating season day 1

x human reader!!

-riding dilf Jake’s face

Long time no writing..

-quick

Y’all are just sooo needy and horny that the sex is clothed!

- eye contact 👁️

Gentle, like has some casual dominance if you squint

-jealous dilf

breeding, spitting in mouth, hand on throat STEAMY

-riding his abs

-day 11 kinkmas

breeding

-thought

-kinkmas day 2 2023

Titty fucking

-kinkmas day 1 2023

cockwarming

-tits guy.

You already know…😈

- random thought

Nsfw, porn without plot

-just seggs w Jake

nsfw just short sexy time

-dilf!jake disciplines you after you guys get home (smut)

self explanatory

-you and Jake are a little too loud… (smut)

when you and jake are fucking in the tent but unfortunately norm and grace can hear

-taking Jake to Utraya Mokri (smut)

"we've been goin' at it like rabbits, how are you still horny??"

-dilf!jake can’t control himself when he sees human reader with an ice cream (smut)

-part 2 of above (also smut)

-you get drunk and Jake has to discipline you 🙄

rough smut! spanking!

-short lil fic abt overstim w Jake and then the aftermath (smut)

again self explanatory

-jake sully headcanons (contains nsfw)

thoughts...

- human Jake and reader have a lil fun when she gets locked out of her room (smut)

little angsty if you squint but mostly funsies!

-just a lil thought abt ma jake..

sex in the tent w/ him

-"are you sure you want this? if i start, i might not be able to stop..." smuttt jake sullyyy

cute little fun nsfw he fucks you on the ground

-Husband!jake headcanons

sfw

-"I'm not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention," JAKE SULLY X READER SMUTTTT

jake being annoying and then sex lmao

-Dilf!Jake w his little halloween traditions from earth (no smut🙄)

sweet one sfw

-"What? Does that feel good?" dilf!jake sully messing around with you during a party. (SMUTT) (Not proofread sorry guys 🙏)

mischeivous and then weird angst, then nsfw

-rough seggs w jake bc jealousy SMUTTT

rough...

-jake sully x chubby reader smut

not genuine smut but he gets into it, then the story cuts bc im lazy

-HUMAN JAKE X NORM’S SISTER SMUTTTT

pretty long one compared to my others. reader is a sciencey girl.

-POV: You get a letter from Jake… &

all sweet and then jake gets long-distance-horny

-“Bed. Now.”

face down ass up 😈

-Roommate (human Jake)

longest one yet i think, but yeah SEX AND RIDING :)

-Dilf!jake who wants to get his human girl pregnant (SMUT)

read the title lmaooo

-“let me fuck the problem away”

stress relief..

-getting her to confess (dilf Jake)

jake has his own unique way of getting words out of you

-dilf!jake w virgin reader

first time with him

-“Let me show ya”

Jake giving you your first aftercare

-“You like rough? I’ll show you rough,”

reader says she wants jake to be less gentle during sex, so he fucks her dumb right there.

-birthday present.

unconventional birthday treat...

-Cola

lana del rey lyrics, how they relate to jakey

-giving him a handjob, kinktober 2023 day 1.

lunaskinktober 2023

-him eating you out, kinktober 2023 day 2.

lunaskinktober 2023

- riding his thigh, kinktober 2023 day 3.

lunaskinktober 2023

-dilf!jake spanking you, kinktober 2023 day 4.

lunaskinktober 2023

-Jake x human reader

doing it in the bathroom :)

-bf!jake thoughts

Slight nsfw

-giving dilf!jake a blowie, kinktober 2023 day 7.

lunaskinktober 2023

-dominant Jake

little nsfw, just a blurb abt him being casually dominant and reader getting drunk.

-dilf!jake and you while you’re in restraints, kinktober day 11

lunaskinktober 2023

-jake sully fingering you, kinktober day 12.

lunaskinktober 2023

- first 69 with Jake, kinktober day 14

lunaskinktober 2023

- size difference, kinktober day 15.

lunaskinktober 2023

-how he loves your tail

A1 Jake and na’vi reader

-my man, his bruises

kind of sad, not nsfw

-begging, kinktober day 17

lunaskinktober 2023

-just a thought

with mating press and breeding..

-edging, kinktober day 20

lunaskinktober 2023

-In rut 🥶

Hottt

-toruk makto>

cocky Jake!

-biting you, kinktober day 23

lunaskinktober 2023

-Rough, kinktober day 24

lunaskinktober 2023

-the best medicine

him doing you while you’re sick to cheer you up!

- catching in you the act, kinktober day 25

lunaskinktober 2023

- overstim, human!jake x reader kinktober day 26

lunaskinktober 2023

- praise with subby Jake, kinktober day 28

lunaskinktober 2023

-dirty talk with dilf!jake, kinktober day 29

lunaskinktober 2023

-A1 jake eats you out when you’re mad at him

Lowkey feels unfinished I’m sorry y’all

-sub Jake hcs

so so so short

- dilf!jake and bratty reader

🫐

- dilf!jake catching you in your first heat

Not proofread sorry! Tell me if there are errors.

-Jake using his tail …

short, pretty sfw.

dilf Jake w virgin reader

shortttt

- using the safe word

Rough!

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slytherinshua · 12 days

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CALIFORNIA LOVE

genre. kinda just summer love w doy thoughts. fluffy but also a bit angsty. warnings. jealousy. lots of kissing. drinking. i don't usually write in present tense so if there are mistakes im so sorry i tried to proofread but i’m tired 😭pairing. doy x fem!reader.wc. 663.request. no.a/n. this is all @eternalgyu's fault that i'm writing for nomad now but srsly doy has me in a chokehold its not funny but also sangha is fighting for bias spot SO???

waking up completely hung over with doeui, hearing the murmured curses that falls from his mouth as the splitting headache hits you both at the same time. as soon as you look at each other, all you can do is just laugh and huddle closer under the blankets, alternating kisses on the other’s forehead to soothe the headaches. memories from the previous night are foggy, but all you really care about is being next to him and feeling the warmth of his skin underneath you.

after you sleep for a bit longer and wake up for the second time in the late morning, doeui runs to the store to get hangover medication and pizza. everything about the morning is lazy and unplanned, just the two of you in each other’s company until the party starts later in the day.

doeui loves how you look in his oversized shirt when he comes back from the store; your hair a mess, but your eyes shining with excitement whenever you look at him. you share the pizza, taking turns feeding each other and sneaking in kisses before you get properly dressed for going out.

except doeui’s idea of properly dressed still involves an open summer shirt exposing his abs and toned chest. it’s perfect attire for the beach, but you can’t help but stare a bit. he can’t complete the outfit without your pearl bracelet and necklace, and in return, you steal his black cap.

drinks, games, skateboarding, swimming, sports, dares— all of the classic summer things that you could indulge in are present at every party. and it lasts for hours. you spend most of the time on the opposing team from your boyfriend, giving him teasing looks and boasting every time you won. you’ll never admit that you purposely got a little touchy with sangha just to get doeui jealous, but you couldn’t deny it either. you wouldn’t have if you hadn’t caught one of the girls staring a bit too closely at his open shirt.

it works like a charm, from the way he pulls your wrist as soon as the game of beach volleyball is finished. when he’s sure that he’s led you out of sight of his friends, his lips find yours faster than you could speak. it’s rushed and a bit rougher than how he normally kisses you, but it’s exactly the reaction you were hoping for when you did everything you could to rile him up. when he’s satisfied with the way he’s smeared your lipgloss and slightly messed up your hair, he mutters a quick, “you’re mine” before he joins the group again, making sure you were on his team for the next round.

as the sun sets, you gather around a cooler of drinks and popsicles. you steal sips of doeui’s beer throughout the time when you’re all laughing and telling stories. he doesn’t mind. each time he catches you reaching for his can, he feels even fonder of you. but he still drinks some of your cider to make things even.

when the sun sets completely and the rest of the friend group leaves, it’s just you and doeui still sitting together on the sand, listening to the waves lap at the shore and feeling the slight chill of the wind. you lean closer to him when he rests a finger under your chin, allowing him to press soft kisses to as much skin as he could reach on your face. his breath feels warm despite how cold the air is, and you think you could easily be able to stay like this forever.

but all good things must come to an end, and for you and doeui, it ends gradually like the summer turning to fall. as the weather gets cooler, so do your hearts. doeui still thinks back to that summer love every time he looks at your pearl necklace that hangs from his car mirror, longing for one more chance to kiss you.

↳ nomad taglist: @eternalgyu,,

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huraiyra · 10 months

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HI! TELL ME ABOUT QUARTZ I BEG YOU!

IM IN LOVE WITH YOU NO ONE'S EVER WANTED TO HEAR AB MY OCs *CRACKS MY KNUCKLES*

... Im so sorry I have autism and can't shut the fuck up when I write (essay incoming)

so Quartz is my babygirl and my favourite OC. fun fact he was originally a straight love interest in a CYOA story I was writing on gotoquiz.com in like 2012. how our stories grow with us

Quartz is an emo scene adult (30) with black and white hair that falls over his eyes and he has the all the lip and eyebrow and ear piercings and striped shirts under band t-shirts thing going on.

his edgy boi angsty backstory is that his mom was my worst nightmare ending for myself (forced to get married and have children and hating all of them forever and trying and failing to be a good mom and eventually just falling apart) and so his childhood sucked due to a mixture of neglect, abuse, and having to take care of himself and failing. he had a bestest friend named Hollis, and a little brother named Jade who was the light of his life, until he gets killed in a hit and run bc mom couldn't be bothered to pick him up after extracurriculars. this is Quartz's villain origin story so he ends up stealing his mom's shit and leaving home at age 16 to go off himself or die or whatever the fuck but then he gets possessed by a dude (Edward) who thinks he is pretty cool :)c Edward helps Quartzie murder the guy who killed his brother. Edward is also a 700 year old freak and jackass who ruins his life more by egging him on to steal shit, do whatever he wants (namely whatever drugs he can get his hands on), fight people who bug him, knife himself but not die, and also possessing and unpossessing him and leaving his body half immortal and half mortal (checkered, like his hair).

he goes to check in on his mom one day and finds her dead on the couch (either killed herself or wasted away, unclear) which understandably ruins his life (again) (x4)

after a good decade of alternative highs of possession and lows of freezing on the ground on Canadian winter nights, Edward decides to bring Quartz to a home for other similarly possessed people (my childhood dream of living in a house with a bunch of friends à la Teen Titans) who all love him to bits despite him being broken, moody, violent and dirty. they don't really see him like that, even though that's all he thinks he is. they see a guy who never got to be a kid whose actually really adorable and decent and has cool interests (see: his backpack full of drawings Hollis gave him, stolen metal and rock CDs, comics, tokens from his brother, his 8 pocket knives, etc), who gets excited about new things, who tries to clean up after himself and treat people with respect, and who might shove you but apologizes immediately afterwards.

theres a trans man who takes a lot of naps and gives really good hugs, a magician who accidentally became his mom friend, a strange famous bald girl who likes being as much of a bum as possible, a genius bubbly girl who decides everyone is her bestie, and a genuine and hopeful but miserable man (Dominique) who was just recently possesed and lost his fiance on the way to his uni grad.

Quartz is a deeply scarred human being by this point and wouldn't mind if they ALL blew up and died, and spends a long time running off and ditching them and having some weird toxic friendship with miserable man.

Dominique is weirdly drawn to him even though he's Magna Cum Laude and well-off and never known pain, but he loves how underneath all the jagged edges this guy is genuine and not mean and the way he talks ab things he likes makes him like it too. Quartz is weirdly drawn to what he sees as a melodramatic priviledged bitch who is really smart and cute and sweet and handsome and kind and adorable and nice to me and nice to everyone and I want him to smile forever FUCK.

Dominique uses the magic power he gained from the possession to heal his suffering just a little (through a mind link). Quartz becomes somewhat addicted to this until Edward convinces him it's fake and bullshit and doesn't matter and on the other hand Dominique's benevolent possessor is like are you fucking kidding me your Summa Cum Laude fiance just died and you're mosying it up with this freak and EDWARD??? (theyve always hated Edward) (but never did anything about it to keep the peace) you should be ashamed of yourself

it takes Quartz a LOT of help including having a home and food and peace, having tv and junk food and homemade food, having people who like him and dont hurt him, just being unpossessed and trying to detox and thinking and thinking and thinking and also a chance meeting with the suicide spirit of his best friend Hollis (not chance) (they were looking for him) to make him realise that even if everything in the world sucks and he sucks and pain is eternal, there's no way out of existence and becoming a suicide spirit will just result in endless cycles of rumination and torture and no way out. LIVING on the other hand? it guarantees always another chance for small joy and if there is any source of joy in the world including friendship, he should embrace it. there's no way out so you might as well try to ease your own suffering and enjoy the good. because there IS good

(ps. I spent 5 years writing the scene where he decides he doesn't want to kill himself, because I was going through the same shit, and it finally came to be when I stopped being actively suicidal. unfortunately unlike him I'm still miserable. hey whats my other name besides Sumi again...)

so he tells Edward to fuck off, has a big fight and Edward leaves for good, and then tells Dominique's possessor to fuck off, and it works and they are humbled and apologize and agree to stop being nosy and resume their promise to being kid to Dominique (and by extension, Quartz) forever again.

Dominique and Quartz end up able to talk and get to know each other and Dominique nurtures him and Quartz teaches him to loosen up and they end up little soulmates in that house and get married!!! everyone else is super supportive and love their two new additions, a smart genuine hopeful and loving man who studies a lot like Genius Bubbly, and a jaded but good man who needs a lot of help but is learning to live again

currently my beloved Quartz is taking antidepressants and going to therapy (it's working for him) and spending each day with a friend or reading (my love never finished high school) and chilling with his husband.

ummmmm tl;dr Quartz. I love him and cannot shut the fuck about him. I'm sorry. thanks for reading (or not reading)

#my ocs #pipe down moppet #tw suicide #THANKS FOR ASKING ANON I LOVE YOU..... I KNOW THERES A WAY TO TALK WITHOUT INFODUMPING I JUST HAVENT LEARNED IT.....#SORRY IF YOU WERE EXPECTING SOMETHING SHORT AND SWEET I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING #plz do nt steal and all that. he is truly the love of my life I love quartz he is everything to me #the metal part is all condensed into this metal song i LOVED as a kid and it still slaps it's radical hysteria by born #and iirc the iconic lyric is SUCK MY DICK OR DEATH and Quartz headbanged to that while Dominique was like WHATS WRONG WITH YOU (LOVINGLY)

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sphericalbee · 15 hours

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bro if either of my irls see this i will look crazy pahtetic idk maybe ill delete iti should probably just leaves this ini the drafts

im pretty pathetic irl anyway i think lol wo who carse

im thinking ab my middle school best friend and i miss her so much it isnt even funny

idk if i was her best friend but i always loved her so much and i think about her almost every day even 2 years later

ik she wasnt doing well and she didnt come from a good home and was awful at managing her emotions and didnt talk to anyone and she would sh (i only know ab bc of some complicated secret poetry thing but she never knew i had seen that but i think she meant me to) and i think she cared about me? i kinda hope not bc i want her to be happy

but i would genuinely give anything to go back in time and talk to her again for just a few hours

i want to text her and tell her everything but idk its too weird after 2 years

i think she deserves to know how much i care about her,, right?

i had to pause twice writing this bc i was crying too hard i worry about her so much

its good im godo at crying silently lol no one can even tell so sneaky

i saw a girl with the same hair as her last week and i teared up in the middle of the hallway because it hit me how much i dont know what shes doing or if shes even alive bc i KNOW hse wasnt fucknig donig well

my cat was trying to comfort me but i think he got bored and left he's so cute lmfoa my brain made it into a very angsty analogy b4 i had the chance to stop it 💀

im this close to cracking and spam texting her

i googled her just now and found her linkedin profile of fucking course shes on linkedin thats so inc harecetr where she says she wants to go to medical school and she uses fucking stupid old words like candor and idk i hope she gets into her dream college

im sure she can she was always so smart i thknk shell do rly well and maybe one day shell perform open heart surgery on me lol that would be baller

"I believe in honesty because it creates an environment that permits integrity. Allowing for candor leads to an honorable work space. Integrity is an essential value to have as it holds all to a high ethical standard. Integrity adds trust, which is necessary for professionalism. I plan to enroll in a four-year college for a master's degree to study biochemistry. I then intend to go to medical school and earn a doctorate."

she fucking talked like that even at 13 yeah and she liked running and read all the time and she loved gamed of thrones and i still own one of her shitty books and we met when she was challenging classmates to race and she was so tall and had pretty hair

sophia im sorry for crying i think it would make her uncomfortable haha

i have fucking snot on my face now shed forsure be uncomfortable lmfaoo

ill go watch some tv show and try not to burst into tears again in 10 minutes ugh maybe it would be better if i had stayed depressed having this many feelings is driving me crazy why r u here bro : /

i should make a secret vent account LMFAO my followers r here for ohshc and mq not sob stories sorry sorry

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ljbrary · 2 years

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2021 fic review 🤠

tysm for the tag AB!! @anxiety-banana 😊

now sit tight while i overshare 🥰✨

total number of completed works: 18! wow i know thats not a lot in the grand scheme of things but its more than i was expecting considering last January i was proud of myself for posting 2 fics 😭

total word count: on ao3, 65,292! but thats not including wattpad or wips ive done this year, so hold on one moment....

oh... oh wow... i have more words in wips than i do in posted works and it comes to about a whopping 67,271 words but thats not including stuff in my notes app or on paper because im too lazy to go through that lmao

but anyway that puts the rough total at... 132,563 words holy crap i need to get a life-

looking back did you write more, less, or the expected amount of fic this year?: MORE DEFINITELY MORE LAKSDJLJDS,F i didnt really expect to write at all really so yeah definitely a lot more

your own favorite story of this year?: dont- dont ask me to choose something i am the most indecisive person i know- especially when all the options are bad ones

okay in all seriousness id say weighted words hurt more than loaded fists (if you know how to use them) because its three of my all time favorite things: rex and ahsoka brotp, pure and unrefined angst, and modern aus.

did you take any writing risks this year?: um id say posting my writing to begin with? considering im mortified of people finding out about this lmao (eg. this summer when my older brother sent this text to me after finding my wattpad, tumblr, and ao3: “so I just found out you’re a fucking nerd. the jig is up.” with a screenshot of my tumblr page and i wanted to either kill my brother or myself but unfortunately chose to do neither and just panicked by digging up blackmail to hang over his head 🤩

do you have any fanfic goals for the new year?: idk, nothing too big probably, but i really really really want to finish some of the wips im super excited about, like this angsty modern au one shot i started like last feb/march featuring anakin and ahsoka that i have sitting in my google docs with no discernible plot yet and 16,110 words

most popular story of the year?: in terms of kudos/hits, lean on me (but let me laugh, first). basically, ahsoka purrs in her sleep, and everyone finds it very amusing (except for her). ill be honest i dont like this one; i dont like the writing but ig people seem to like it well enough?? somehow the only angst-free fic i wrote is my most popular and idk how that tracks but it does ig

in terms of how people have received my fics, ive been told by people that they like it’s not good grief (but it’s better) which is just anakin and ahsoka post wrong jedi arc (and angst, per usual)

story most under-appreciated?: id say weighted words hurt more than loaded fists (if you know how to use them) because its pretty much at the bottom of my stats on ao3 for both kudos and hits yet it if i had to choose one i like the best it would probably be that one

most fun story to write?: OOOH DEFINITELY MY CRIME AU SERIES JSKDHFS

trust goes both ways (or neither) its not the most glorious of writing but hey it was so so so fun to plan and write and- oh hey author look! its not done yet! (im sorry i promise i havent forgotten about it skjdhfdsljfk sorry AB @anxiety-banana 😭)

most unintentionally telling story?: idrk what this question is supposed to mean in all honesty but maybe im just dumb but im still gonna pretend i know how to answer it

maybe when there is nothing left but us (and of course it had to be you)??? because its my first fic on ao3 and yeah i guess thats kind of self explanatory. its basically an order 66 au where (spoiler alert), rex sacrifices himself for ahsoka to escape, and in the process maul tags along -- uninvited, as always.

biggest disappointment?: myself

sorry i couldnt help it it was asking for it.

i guess id say the road to hell is paved with good intentions because i planned it all out and then never worked on it again which sucks because its totally something i want to read but ig thats not happening anytime soon 💀

biggest surprise?: all of them. im not kidding. none of them were planned and all of them were the product of both poor life decisions and even poorer executive functioning skills.

but maybe i’m not here to save you (you will save yourself)?? because its a six of crows fic and id only written star wars stuff until that point, which was in fact like four weeks ago so-

no pressure tags: (sorry if youve already been tagged haha) @ashgryff @ahsokryze @lynnpaper @hannah-schooler @dashedwithromance and anyone else who wants to do it!! 😊

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faggyangel · 3 years

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AUTHOR INTERVIEW

tagged by the lovely @arrowflier and @gallavich-x

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

36 <3

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

111,708 (which is so weird to think about lol)

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

If I Were Paralyzed / 292

Mickey’s Upset / 280

Disney Movies and Breakfast in Bed / 269

good / 259

Safety in Names / 252

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i’m really bad at responding to comments, i always try to but i always forget to do it. if i don’t respond to your comment, don’t get me wrong, i do appreciate it so much, it always makes me feel better about my writing. love all of you so much <33

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

uhh, i don’t really write a lot of stuff with super angsty endings, though i would say some of my stuff with more open endings could be considered angsty so I guess Internalized doesn’t have a very happy ending, it’s def open ended but it leaves room for some healing or really anything from my All You Wanna Do series

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

probably either Sick and Snippy or Without You but legit most of mine are just pure fluff

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

i haven’t but i’ve always enjoy some of those 9-1-1 and Shameless crossovers

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

nope ! you’re all so nice !

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

never explicit, no. sometimes i do vague descriptions of it if it’s necessary for the story i.e. my All You Wanna Do series where ian has issues during sexual situations but no lol i could never write anything sexually explicit

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of, no

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

again, not that i know of

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nah, but i have had someone offer before but when i write a fic, its pretty much spontaneous if its not a serious one

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

probably either gallavich or esperastra (because my queer wlw heart cant be stopped)

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

oof, my pain (won’t be forever more) thing. it was suppose to be a royalty, medieval kind of au but i wrote it when i was just starting out writing so its like really bad and im not into writing long, multi-chapter kind of fics so i probably won’t ever actually finish (sorry if any one actually likes it </3 but i look back and cringe)

15. What are your writing strengths?

im not really sure but i think i would say probably more serious character studies, specifically ian (which is kind of funny cause when i was first starting out, i wrote more for mickey)

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

i think i have a lot tbh, i think i struggle with long form, structured ideas which is why i prefer to write about feelings rather than plot, does that make sense?

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i’ve done it a couple times with ukrainian but i really dont think i’ll do it a lot cause i dont think ive ever done it even close to perfectly

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

oh god, im so sorry, it was supernatural </3

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

i really wanna write for trobed (troy barnes/abed nadir from community) but ive never been able to get the characters to sound right so i havent yet, im hoping to do it soon tho cause i have a lot of ideas for them

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

uhh, i hate like any kind of self promotion but i think my What We Deserve (and What We Don’t) and the apple are two of my better ones.

im never sure who has been tagged already for these sorts of things so im hoping no one i tag has been already <3 @ianandmickeygallavich @mishervellous @sickness-health-all-that-shit

#im always so bad at tagging people helppp #tagging games

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lonelyheartsmotel · 3 years

Text

fic writer tag game✨

thank you for the tag, @nocompromise-noregrets!!

how many works do you have on AO3? 15!

what’s your total AO3 word count? 98,645

how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

these are the fandoms listed on ao3 - not counting the different hobbit tags, it’s 10, but some of them aren’t really the fandom i’m writing for. for example the taylor swift ones are all album inspiration for lotr/th fics, and the ari & dante was a fusion fic where i wrote a supernatural fic where the story and setting were inspired by ari & dante.

what are your top 5 fics by kudos? in descending order: New Perspectives on the Origins of Paranormal Experiences (trobed ghostfic), Workshop in Serial Publishing and Office Romances (trobed christmas office romance), the road not taken / tell me i've got it wrong somehow (bagginshield modern au inspired by evermore), Contemporary Analyses of Speculative Fiction (trobed space au where abed is a librarian outside of time and troy grows and harvests stories), and a compulsion to come back (trobed pirate au).

do you respond to comments, why or why not? i respond to most if not all! i’m an attention whore and i always love getting comments thats why

what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? nothing i’ve written and actually take seriously has an angsty ending, but i have an angsty pwp from my high school days that doesn’t end happily - storm and stress, a queen of the tearling fic lmao :bota:

do you write crossovers? literally all of my fics are AUs and a lot of them are fusions that take place in another media property’s universe! but i’ve never written a crossover where characters in one universe go to another fictional universe and interact with the characters/story/setting there.

have you ever received hate on a fic? no...i don’t think my fics are read by a large enough audience to get hate ajsdfklajsdflkdjs i’ve been lucky so far.

do you write smut? if so what kind? yeah, but not much ahaha i wrote more of it in high school and then did not write any until 2020 when i unexpectedly wrote it into the road not taken / tell me i've got it wrong somehow. and i have another fic with barduil smut in my wips but i dont even know if thats ever gonna see light of day lmao

have you ever had a fic stolen? not to my knowledge..

have you ever had a fic translated? nope!

have you ever co-written a fic before? me and my wife @nadir-barnes are writing a big trobed project (it’s [redacted]) :)

what’s your all time favorite ship? i can’t pick one of anything let alone a ship asldfj;alsdjg im sorry babes they’re all special to me

what’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? great tenors of the past (barduil high school au). i already have some of the ending written and i know how it’s ending but it’s the Getting There :facedown:

what are your writing strengths? most people say my visual description which i really appreciate! but due to my personal philosophy i am trying to branch out of that and engage a sensory writing experience that isn’t so vision-centred and not only touches other senses but also transcends the taxonomification of the five senses if that makes sense god sorry that was so pretentious i hate myself

what are your writing weaknesses? writing ahahaha . ok im sorry that sounded like a joke but like writing is hard Bros. also dialogue and character voices.

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? i love it! fuck english

what was the first fandom you wrote for? idk probably harry potter or artemis fowl or merlin

what’s your favorite fic you’ve written? hmm that’s a hard question but i’m pretty fond of Contemporary Analyses of Speculative Fiction and i have a soft spot for a feast of starlight (barduil college au).

tagging with no pressure: @butterednoodlesjules @slutabed @imaginedmelody

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anythingtrxsh · 5 years

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Henlo!! Can you recommend Your favourite slice of life kinda stories, just taekook being boyfriends and being domestic and fluffy. I love those and can't seem to get enough ! I love your blog ♡♡

ohh i was really looking forward to answer this one!! fluff is literally what i live for and you’re in luck bc i have so many recs for this. i’m literally smiling so much as i type this :))) also thank u so much for liking my blog :(( that really means a lot to me

Gold Star For Effort [11k] by teatimetaemint {taehyung’s a callboy and it looks smutty but its so ?? cute ??? there is smut though, but again– it’s mostly crack tbh}

and i get to kiss you, baby, just because i can [9k] by locks {thERE’S A TEXT SOMEWHERE IN THERE AND I’M SOF T}

there’s nothing like us (nothing like you and me baby) [7k] by taekookgi {its a canon compliant and they kiss in the sidewalk bc theyre tired of hiding and now im so so sad ohmygod}

All’s Fair in Coffee and War [6k] by expplipo {this is the 1st part of the big picture series. it’s crack! and fluff!! and i love this!!!}

To Tie or Knot To Tie [5k] by expplipo {this one’s the 3rd part of the big picture series. yes i know i totally skiped over the second part of the series but i have my rEASo ns ok dont @ me. that fic broke me. its the most angsty fic ive ever read. this one’s not though. this is really really fluffy and cute and i love this. my heart feels full

5 millimeters per fucking second [4k] by Curionenene {shy jeongguk is everything i wanted in this world. i live for shy jeongguk. shy jeongguk cures my acne. shy jeongguk tones my abs. shy jeongguk makes life worth living}

shape of you [4k] by aeterisks {ah, yes– an ask where i dont rec aeterisk? sorry bud, try again}

you talk all that sweet talk [2k] by madeliefie {the superior!! fluffy !! fic!!! jeongguk wakes up from surgery and thinks he’s dead bc taehyung’s there and he thinks he’s an angel?? but theyre married??? and jeongguk doesnt believe him???? my heart cant take it}

Marry Me? (and can we get fries with that?) [2k] by smoltae {part of the x + 1 times universe and its really fucking cute i cant deal with this shit holy fuck}

The Devil Wears Socks (In Bed) [1k] by bananamilks {shy !! jeongguk !!!! and model tae also– so so fluffy! marvel makes an appearance}

always been you [1k] by aeterisks {twice in the same ask?? ugh– their power. also. canon compliant!!}

ok so obviously the fics here arent really long but thats how fluffy fics are bc otherwise it gets cringy yknow? but i hope you like them either way!!

happy reading!!

#taekook #taekook fic #taekook fic rec #taekook fluff #taekook feed #established taekook #taekook crack #domestic taekook #fluff #so so much fluff #not cringy though #bts fic #bts fic rec #bts ao3 #taekook ao3 #ao3 fic rec

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omgficrecsplease · 6 years

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omgcp fanfic starter pack!

hi y’all! we here at omgficrecsplease have put together a quick, little check please! fanfic starter pack! all fics are sorted by pairings and we hope you enjoy! and be sure to check out all the recs we have posted here! have a wonderful day y’all! :D

Jack/Bitty

A Little Bit Closer by marswithghosts

E | 107,963 | Summary: Eric Bittle's To-Do List:

1.) Frame Masters in Library and Information Science diploma and send to Mama, because she never understood the lack of sleep and abuse of caffeine, but she sent cookbooks and money for good chocolate, bless her. 2.) Throw away every last highlighted article, graded paper, and syllabus, because they are no longer needed, thank the sweet Lord. 3.) Promote the library's new periodic reading series, because it wasn't the capstone project for nothing. 4.) Harass Boston Bruins star Jack Zimmermann into taking a picture for @BPLWestEnd to promote the reading of his new children's book, Jacky's Bad Days. 5.) Do not ogle Boston Bruins star Jack Zimmermann's ass. 6.) Fail step five. Repeatedly.

Ice Crew Please! by rosepetals42

T | 61,433 | Summary: Jack Zimmermann was drafted first by the Providence Falconers when he was eighteen years old. He is good at hockey. Very good. His team won the Cup his second year and now, in his third year, they are looking good. Jack should be on top of the world. And some days, he manages to convince himself he is.He’s not, of course.

Enter the Ice Crew.

AKA: The Ice Crew AU

maybe i'm waking up by idrilka

M | 157,904 | Summary: It’s almost funny. All he ever wanted was to play hockey, to play in the NHL, to win the Cup. This—Samwell, the team, the Haus—was supposed to be just a detour, but now it feels more like a destination he failed to realize he’s already reached.

(Or: Jack signs with the Falconers, graduates, and leaves. It's the hardest thing he's ever done. What comes after is even harder.)

self reflection by sinspiration

T | 29,218 | Summary: Bitty is in Annie’s, bent over his textbooks and wondering, not for the first time, why he decided to take French as a language (oh yes, it’s because so many old recipes are written in French, he’s going abroad there to study food history, can’t wait for the summer; half of fall and then winter semester until he goes, but that doesn’t help him now does it), when he hears someone clear their throat. “Excuse me, is this seat taken?” Oh boy. Eric doesn’t even bother lifting up his head. “Sorry, not a girl and not interested.”

Something Like This by emmagrant01

E | 285,748 | Summary: Jack thought his first year in the NHL would be 100% about hockey, but the reality is so much more complicated. (AU where the Goodbye for the Summer comics didn’t happen, because I had already written 80K words of this. But just because it’s canon doesn’t mean we can’t still enjoy long, angsty, get-together stories, amirite?)

Alternate summary, courtesy of Dracavia: What if Bad Bob didn't say anything at graduation?

Nursey/Dex

a service i can render by miastree

T | 73,484 | Summary: (11:48) Hey Bits are you free on Saturday? I want to go and see a movie or something (12:09) damn right im free (12:09) this is america

Dex wonders if the person that keeps ceaselessly texting him at all hours is at all interested in legitimate conversation or if his life is, genuinely, that boring. He keeps replying anyway, because for some reason, the appeal of a clumsy, nosy, ex-hockey-playing ballet dancer that types in all lower case happens to be greater than he first thought.

Standing right outside my door by eleanor_lavish

M | 5,594 | Summary: “I’ve been doing holidays alone for years, bro. I mean, I spent more holidays at Andover than in New York.”

Dex’s fingers tighten on the steering wheel. He kind of really hates Nursey’s parents right now, even though he’s never met them. He wants to yell at Nursey about this ridiculous chill he has going on, about how it’s fucked up, ask how he’s not just pissed off all the fucking time, but he looks over and Nursey’s eyes are still closed, and he’s curled in on himself in the seat. “Yeah, well. Not this year,” he says firmly.

I Know I Am, But What Are You? by sysrae

E | 19,322 | Summary: “I need you,” says Dex, “to be my fake date at my family Christmas. Please.”

“Cool,” says Nursey, mouth operating on Chill Autopilot while his higher brain functions come to a screeching halt. “I can do that.”

Bitty/Jack/Kent

touchy subject by applecrumbledore

E | 49,578 | Summary: Bitty finds a photo booth strip and almost doesn't recognize Jack because he's not sure he's ever seen him grin off-ice before, and his hair is so long it curls around his ears, and he's so, so young. It takes Bitty a few long seconds to realize the boy he's kissing is Kent Parson, with the same backwards cap and everything.

I Watched It Begin Again by jacksbits (fragilehuge)

E | 19,979 | Summary: Kent hits on a stranger at a party. Except the party is at Jack’s house and the stranger is Bitty. It’s not Kent’s smoothest move.

Infinity, Plus One by SummerFrost

E | 75,577 | Summary: Eric Bittle hoped to find a lot of things at Samwell University, but being caught in the cross-fire between his surly captain, Jack Zimmermann, and his friendly-but-moody alternate captain, Kent Parson, was certainly not one of them.

Ransom/Holster

Five Things Adam Birkholtz Learns in HDFS 332: Healthy Couple Relationships by EllyAvon

T | 6,079 | Summary: HDFS 332: Healthy Couple Relationships is just the night class Holster is taking with Lardo to fulfill one of his core requirements. He doesn't expect it to drastically change his life.

OR: The Weirdest Healthy Relationships PSA Ever.

OR: Wholesome Holsom

In a Different Frame by sunfair

E | 4,853 | Summary: Holster is determined to become somebody's boyfriend. Too bad he's kind of an idiot. He figures it out, though.

someone as good for me as you by astrolesbian

T | 7,056 | Summary: “So tell me,” Justin’s mother says, all business, “is your boy going to propose?”

“What, Jack?” Justin says, and doesn’t really think much of it, because his mother eats up the details of Jack and Bitty and JackandBitty like Holster eats up rom-coms.

His mother sighs, and he can practically hear her rolling her eyes. “No, baby, I meant Adam.”

Shitty/Lardo

Exeunt, Pursued By Heteronormativity by psocoptera

M | 35,786 | Summary: Shitty Knight takes a post-graduation road trip. Four friends, six thousand miles, two tents, several embarrassing photos, a giant rabbit, three cops, and a bear.

Jack/Kent

It's a Good Life If You Don't Weaken by garden of succulents (staranise)

E | 33,373 | Summary: Making it through the draft is just the beginning.

Kent and Jack are on different teams at opposite ends of the continent. They're living up to huge expectations. They're not supposed to show pain. And not everything they do to get by is precisely healthy.

Fortunately, they're not totally alone.

right on time by leetlebird

T | 49,428 | Summary: Eric Bittle doesn’t have the best track record when it comes to dating, but even he’s embarrassed for himself when he starts flirting on Tinder with a guy who has a weird cat obsession, abs so perfect they border on trashy, and DL in his profile.

Eric Bittle also hates the office finance guy, Kent Parson, more than is probably healthy to hate one of your coworkers.

These two things are in no way related.

Or, the You’ve Got Mail AU that had to be written.

didn't ask for you by Mizzy

M | 24,702 | Summary: Kent Parson has well over ninety-nine problems. He has a chronic potty mouth, a sneaking suspicion he may be an actual idiot, a narcissistically-named cat with gas issues, too many sisters... the list goes on.

Kent Parson has more than ninety-nine problems and Jack Zimmermann — freshly, resentfully and recently traded to the Las Vegas Aces — is definitely one of them.

Gen

Chime Hours by MarquisdeHockey (SpacePunkStevie) (note: it’s tagged for ships but it’s firmly gen)

M | 54,811 | Summary: Back in Montreal, not long before the draft, Jack had died. But only for a bit.

The witch he'd met there had very kindly saved his life, so he was inclined to forgive him any small oversight. For instance, the lack of instruction manual or, perhaps, the fact that he'd neglected to mention Jack's new psychic powers.

So he kept his head down. Played hockey. Tried to navigate old friends and new teammates. And, occasionally, he'd have to go and stop a death he'd seen coming like he was some sort of conscientious banshee. What he absolutely didn't want to do was to solve any mysteries or delve any deeper into the whole magic... thing.

Series

Best Laid Plans by Euphorion

E | 18,596 | Summary: "Dude," said Holster, his eyes huge, "that's so sad. We gotta get them together."

"This isn't a romcom, Holtzy," Ransom said, patting his arm. "I'm sure that's not what Shitty had in mind."

"Actually," said Shitty, "that's exactly what I had in mind. And I've got a plan."

#omgcp fic rec #check please fic rec #fic list: starter pack #mod danielle #obvs this is by no means comprehensive but we hope you all will like it!

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nickireadstfc · 7 years

Text

The Raven King, Chapter 13 – The Birth of Responsible Neil Josten

In which our favourite angsty runaway finally starts being useful, Andreil engage in some hot ab-touching, Wymack Knows™ things and I sense yet more Hufflepuffs dawning on the horizon.

Sounds good? Then it’s time for Nicki to read The Raven King.

The enw chapter starts and already we have to witness shit that I am decidedly not liking:

Nicky being super fucking miserable.

“We shouldn’t have come here,” Nicky said, sounding as wretched as he looked. (…) “What have I done?”

NOOOOOOOOO MY SUNSHINE SON

On the long, long list of why I fucking hate Drake’s guts, “He made Nicky sad” is one point I am especially angry about having to add.

You know, apart from all the obvious fuckery.

Thankfully, I can trust my man Josten to stop Nicky from sinking down further into the Guilt Depression Pit:

“You didn’t do anything,” Neil said. (…) “You didn’t know this was going to happen. None of us did. If we’d known, we wouldn’t have come.”

That’s what I was bloody saying. Thank you, Sir Runaway Angst Lord, for finally agreeing with me on something.

Also where’s this sudden rush of being the voice of reason coming from?

“It doesn’t make sense that Drake would come here. Higgins was here a month ago. Why wait so long, and why risk it? The police can track a cross-country plane ticket easily.”

That’s……. actually a very good point I had not considered before.

Why was Drake there? To “””make amends””” with his “””little brother””” (my toenails are rolling just typing that word), sure – but why now?

There’s more to this. WHAT IS IT.

No time to deal with this now – for now, we are dealing with Andrew getting sent on a nice lil vacation to Fun Anti-Mania Rehab.

Kevin fixed Betsy with a stunned look. “It’s too early. What do you think you’re doing?”

“The right thing,” Betsy said.

HELL YEAH SHE IS.

Bless Betsy Dobson for turning cliché action movie lines into lines that make me actually emotional.

“Who will take care of Kevin if I’m gone? I can’t trust him wandering around here by himself, and Coach can’t be with him all the time. Kevin’s kind of a full-time job.” (…)

“I’ll watch him,” Neil said.

BITCH WHAT.

“What do you think you are saying? What are you trying to do?”

“Take responsibility,” Neil said in German.

BITCH WHAT.

“VERANTWORTUNG ÜBERNEHMEN”, DIGGAH WAS.

I did not know you vocabulary even included that word.

Our boy??? Is finally starting to be responsible, adult and useful??? WHAT IS THIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT I AM WITNESSING.

“If I was going to leave I would have done so at the banquet when Riko called me by my name,” Neil said. “I won’t lie and say I didn’t think about it, but I decided to stay. I trusted you more than I was scared of him. So trust me now if you can. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll take care of Kevin until you return.”

Cause of death: This.

Responsible Neil, where did you suddenly come from?? And most importantly, how can we make sure you don’t transform back into Angsty and Dramatic Neil??

“You lie, and lie, and lie, and you think I’ll trust you with his life?”

“Then don’t tust ‘Neil’”, Neil said. “Trust me.”

“Oh, but who are you? Do you have a name?”

“If you need one, call me Abram.”

Oh my goooood.

Neil giving out his birth name (or parts of it) to Andrew just adds a whole ‘nother level of intimacy, rawness and seriousness to this exchange.

It also adds another level of I can’t fucking deal with this.

With so many people watching them Neil couldn’t life his shirt. He did the next best thing and dragged one of Andrew’s hands under the hem. He pressed Andrew’s palm to the ugly scarring across his abdomen.

Touching!!!!!!!!! On his scars!!!!! Which no one has ever even seen!!!!! And Andrew gets to motherfucking touch them!!!! TOUCHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My Andreil heart is having a fucking rave, you guys.

“Do you understand?” Neil asked. “Nothing Riko does will make me leave him. We will both be here when you get back.”

IM FUCKNG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Remember when I had huge Kevandreil feels way back in the beginning/middle of the first book? Remember that?? REMEMBER????

I’m still not set on whether I ship it romantically, sexually or just hardcore-platonically (although I’m leaning to the latter), but just – THE DYNAMICS, YOU GUYS.

You can always sign me the fuck up for a good triumvirate.

And of course, not even Andrew can say no to an offer when it comes in the form of some good ab-touching, and just like that, he leaves for rehab.

Godspeed, my manic murder kitten – please come back happier, healthier, yet hopefully just as full of sass. <3

There’s a little thing at the end of this exchange, though, that is quickly glossed over but that caught my attention, and that is Wymack being a perceptive bastard:

“Hopefully hearing about all of this (…) will get [Aaron] moving, but who knows when it comes to those two? Speaking of unpredictable assholes, when did that happen?”

“When did what?” Neil asked.

Wymack eyes him. “Forget it.”

Is he……….. already hinting at Neil and Andrew having A Thing………….. Wymack Knows™.

Did I mention I love that guy recently? #dicksoutforperceptivebastards

“What about the season?” Kevin asked. “What about Riko?”

“What about Andrew? Attempt to think about someone and something else for just a moment there.”

DID I MENTION I LOVE THAT GUY RECENTLY. #dicksoutforcaringaboutandrew

“Look,” Wymack said. “I know I’ve always told you all to take your personal problems up with Betsy or Abby. I’ve said it’s not my place to get into anything outside the court. I hope you’ve figured out by now that I’m just blowing hot air.”

Grumpy Fox Dad ily <33

Guess who’s back now – Aaron, fresh outta custody.

Guess who’s really emo and angry about the Andrew Situation – Aaron, back to being bitter and broody as per usual.

Guess who’s finally done taking his shit and starts dishing out some reason and sensibility in this mess – RESPONSIBLE NEIL FUCKING JOSTEN.

“Are you at all sorry?” Neil asked. “You took his family away from him. (…) Do you think Cass will ever forgive Andrew?”

Fair point – I’m all for Drake being Not A Thing anymore, of course (although imo prison would have done the job better than, you know, murder), but there is no denying that Aaron made sure the only woman that ever came close to a mum for Andrew now hates him till forever, probably.

“I don’t care about Cass or Drake or anyone. What Drake did – no. If I could bring him back from the dead and kill him again I would.”

“Good,” Neil said quietly. “So now you understand why Andrew killed your mother.”

HOLY SHIT.

Holy shit he’s fucking RIGHT oh my god. I did not see this coming at all (and neither did Aaron) and I am SHITTING MYSELF.

“You don’t know anything,” Aaron said.

“I know you’ve got a couple weeks to think about it,” Neil said. “When Andrew comes back sober you’ll have to talk about this. You won’t get anywhere if you start with Drake, so you might as well start with your mother.”

Neil, I am just honestly so, so impressed with you right now.

Just – this. This exchange right there so, so fucking important. I can already see that this will help the twins greatly in finally becoming real siblings, and Neil was the one who made that happen.

It’s been said time and time again how Neil will be the one bringing the Foxes together, and every time I see it actually happening now I leap out of my skin in happiness.

And the key to all of that happening is the birth of Responsible Neil we are witnessing right now.

I want you guys to really, really get how amazing I find this new development. One thing that, in hindsight, really annoyed me about Neil in the first book was how fucking Dramatic, Angsty and Extra™ he was – and I know this made for some good jokes, but it honestly also annoyed me a lot. He was just so whiny. And I know it’s for good reason, but still – I just kept hoping he would one day pull his head out of his ass.

Breaking news: Our boy Neil’s head has now left his ass.

This scene, all these scenes are so amazing because: TFC-Neil wouldn’t have done this. TFC-Neil would have stood there uncomfortably, saying nothing and staring, dramatically contemplating his own angst and his own trauma and why he should run away now and how oh so fucking tragic his own life is.

TRK-Neil does not. TRK-Neil deals with problems other than his own, starts taking responsibility and gets out of his own fucking head for once.

TLDR: FUCK. YEAH.

The monsters (minus one) and the Fox Parents get back to Palmetto, where they’re all reunited with the rest of the team – which is not as uncomfortable as I thought it would be, since apparently the story is all over the news and no dramatic retellings are in order.

Also, apparently Matt’s mom bailed Aaron out of jail, as a ‘thank you’ for him helping Matt get clean. Neat!

“We’re all Foxes. We are a team. What happens to one of us happens to all of us, and we’re going to get each other through this.” (…)

If it wasn’t so terrible, it’d be brilliant. This was what Dan and Matt had been waiting for all semester: a catalyst to finally unite the team.

Have I mentioned how much I’m feels-nutting every time the Foxy Team Spirit gains some bonus points? Have I?? HAVE I????????

However, it’s not all fun and games (not that it ever was fun and games), as there is Serious Exy Trouble resulting from Andrew being gone:

“If the ERC decides Andrew isn’t part of our line-up anymore, we’re beneath size regulations. They’ll strike us from the roster and our year is over. (…) Kevin is afraid.”

Dun dun dun duuuuuuuun. That’s a pretty shit situation you got there, mate.

Neil fixed Kevin with a stony look. “Maybe if you’d stuck around a moment longer you’d understand why I don’t care anymore. When you came upstairs, did you hear mim laughing, Kevin? (…) So yes, even I would give up on this season. And after everything he’s done and every risk he’s taken for you, you’d better feel the same.”

MIKE FUCKING DROP.

With Neil gone, Kevin currently takes the top spot on the List of People Who Need To get Their Heads Out Of Their Own Angsty Ass.

“Rhemann has taken our side. He offered to speak on our behalf if need be, and he’s helped reach out to the others.”

James Rhemann, apparently, is the coach for the USC Trojans – a team that is so fair and kind they never, ever got a single red card in their entire existence.

I am DELIGHTED. When do we meet those USC cinnamon puffs, give them to me NOW.

“As of this morning, the vote across the Class I teams is almost unanimous,” Wymack said. “They want us to finish the season.”

HELL FUCKIN YEAH.

“I want one lap for every time you’ve ever said the NCAA’s never had your back.”

“Oh, Jesus,” Nicky said. “We’ll be running all day.”

BAHAHAHAHA. I actually had to laugh so hard at that. Possibly because it’s the first time there is a reason for laughter in, like, three chapters.

But also possibly because it’s just unexpectedly really funny.

In summary: The Foxes get to play on, Andrew finally gets the help he needs and deserves, and Neil’s head gets a serious applause from me for being finally free of his ass.

If you like what I do here and you want to help me continue writing, please consider buying me a coffee! Thank you so much <3

One last note: New update will be out on Monday instead of Sunday because I’m gone all weekend – I’ll be at a cheerleading event with my friends! I can already hear myself going “That’s Katelyn” at every single cheerleader wearing orange. Wheee!

#nicki reads tfc #trk #tfc #aftg #the raven king #the foxhole court #all for the game #nora sakavic #dicksoutforwymack #dicksoutforperceptivebastards #dicksoutforcaringaboutandrew #honestly the last one is all that matters to me

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