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beauregardlionett · 4 years

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morning begins with your lips

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The Mighty Nein was a group that one could describe as existing in a constant state of flux. Sometimes they appeared competent and sometimes...well. Precious little in their lives remained as a fixed constant, including themselves. They were always changing and shifting one way or another, and it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. It did, however, make it rather difficult for allies and enemies alike to keep up.

There was, however, one consistent constant - even if it was a minuscule detail. Beauregard Lionett always woke first in the morning.

Her training was a hard thing to shake, and life on the road did not lend to sleeping late most days. Beau also wasn’t in the market for changing her sleeping habits. So she woke moments before the dawn each morning and went through her usual workout.

That morning found them in a tavern, Caleb having used up too many spells the day before to cast their tower. It was a fairly nice tavern, so none of them minded. Beau sat herself at a circular table in the corner with coffee and some food (thankfully they had bacon here), and waited for everyone else to arrive.

The rest of the Nein arrived in a particular pattern - one Beau kept intricate familiarity with. About twenty minutes after she got back from her workouts, Caleb would show his face, slightly haggard, but awake. His inner alarm clock benefited him in waking up on time. Veth often followed close on his heels, especially since they frequently shared a room.

Fjord came next, no more than ten minutes after Veth. Beau suspected his life at the docks had ingrained the habit into him over the years of work. Jester and Caduceus were a toss up because sometimes Jester arrived first, others it was Caduceus, and sometimes both appeared at the same time. No matter what the order, the clerics always arrived to breakfast looking perky and put together.

Yasha always woke last, and Beau knew it was because the Aasimar always struggled to fall asleep at night. She slept late every morning, and usually just rolled out of bed, straightened out her clothing, and came down to breakfast.

A consistent morning routine that Beau knew by heart, a practice in a punctual routine that soothed like meditation. A promise kept the same way the sun rose every morning.

Sure enough, Beau sat in her seat, nursing her coffee and savoring her bacon as Caleb trudged down to the tavern. His tired blue eyes scanned for her, his feet carrying him her way once he located her. Beau watched as he gave the barmaid his quiet request for breakfast on his way over. The wizard dropped into his seat beside her and yawned a greeting.

Beau slid what remained of her coffee his way in silent commiseration. His fingertips were ink stained, which meant he probably had gotten little sleep, the fool.

Veth came bounding over minutes later, cheerful and sleep rumpled as she perched on Caleb’s other side. Stretching up on her tip-toes, the Halfling planted a sweet kiss to his cheek (a practice only done occasionally) before hollering an order to the barmaid that hollered back.

“Morning,” Beau said as she tugged a piece of bacon into two, trying to make it last longer.

“Morning,” Veth returned, fiddling with her crossbow already. Beau didn’t ask what she was attempting this time, just monitored the mechanism in case it misfired.

Their conversation didn’t extend much past that as Veth continued fiddling and Caleb tried to keep his eyes open. Beau was content with the familiarity.

They had barely finished exchanging pleasantries when Fjord arrived, yawning but alert. The half-Orc caught Beau’s eye with a nod before he wandered over to the bar. She watched him exchange pleasant conversation with the barkeep for a few minutes, probably gleaning some information about the town or surrounding area. He did this sometimes when they got to new towns none of them had heard of or been to before, and it almost always helped.

Beau tracked Fjord’s movements as he left the bar with a coffee, making his way to their table. The barmaid arrived with Caleb and Veth’s plates as Fjord sat down on Veth’s free side.

“Whatever you’ve got works for me,” Fjord said pleasantly, his effortless charm pulling a smile to the woman’s face. She bustled away, and Fjord suppressed another yawn as he turned to the table.

“Barkeep says the town’s been calm ever since the war was called to truce. Decreased presence of guard, not as many brawls in the streets and bars, and trade has been up. I don’t think there’s much going on here if we want to move on later. We might have some luck in the market for rations, but beyond that,” Fjord ended with a shrug.

Beau appreciated his forethought in matters like these, because she sometimes got caught up in the bigger picture. Her mind worked in ways better attuned to connecting threads and digging up nuanced details. Sometimes she could ground herself enough to get shit done in the present, but it was hardly ever regarding mundane day-to-day plans.

“So, shopping and hit the road?” Beau said, tearing her bacon into smaller pieces again.

“Sounds like a plan,” Fjord nodded, sipping at his coffee. The barmaid arrived then with the half-Orc’s food before she bustled off again.

Beau settled into her seat, one leg thrown over Caleb’s lap as he chipped away at his plate. Veth began needling at Fjord in teasing conversation, the half-Orc indulging her with fond exasperation. Beau watched on and chuckled now and then, thoroughly entertained.

Veth had just convinced Fjord to play a game of boulder parchment shears for his last piece of sausage when Caduceus and Jester arrived. The clerics were discussing the benefits of talking to the massive oak tree they saw on their way into town as they took their seats. Jester flounced into the seat beside Fjord, Caduceus sitting on her other side as they kept talking. The pair paused long enough to greet the table before getting back into it.

“I’m just saying - morning guys! - we should try it,” Jester said, eyes boring imploringly into Caduceus’. “Maybe the oak will be friendly!”

“Of course we can try,” Caduceus agreed, setting his staff to lean against the table. “But in my experience, oak trees are always rather stuck up.”

Beau decided not to question how many oak trees Caduceus spoke to in his free time. The barmaid swept up to their table again, distracting the clerics momentarily.

“I’ll have some potatoes and tea, please,” Caduceus drawled with a pleasant smile.

“Do you have any pastries?” Jester asked predictably, violet eyes wide as she twisted in her seat.

“We’ve got muffins?” The barmaid said, eyeing Jester’s bright, eager eyes warily.

“I’ll take three!” The Tiefling chirped. “And a glass of milk, please!”

“Sure,” the barmaid nodded before sweeping off.

Beau gnawed on her bacon as Jester and Caduceus resumed their conversation, Fjord dejectedly losing his sausage to Veth’s victorious crow. Caleb started tapping an absent rhythm against Beau’s knee, and she let him. All was as it should be thus far, Beau’s eyes wandering to the stair as she waited for the last piece of the puzzle to fall into place.

Yasha’s absence when she had been under Obann’s control was a jarring discontinuity to Beau’s routine. She had been off kilter for more than one reason the entire time Yasha had been away. Beau hated to remember those days. As much fun as they had on some of their adventures, there was always that missing piece, that quiet snark that never piped up in conversation. There was no one at her back in those fights, no familiar battle cry, no unyielding support that Beau could fall back on with absolute trust.

She knew Yasha was last to rise, but the passing minutes never failed to pulse in Beau’s veins with anxiety. An irrational yet rational fear that she would never show.

Beau counted the minutes, tuning out conversation, absently aware of Caleb’s pattern against her kneecap.

Yasha stumbled down the stairs, tugging her tunic into order as she made her way over to their table. A surprising amount of tension bled from Beau’s shoulders with every step closer Yasha took. Jester came up from devouring her muffins long enough to greet Yasha, crumbs falling out of her mouth as she did.

“Mornin’ Yafa!” Jester managed through her food. The Aasimar offered the Tiefling a sleepy smile as she headed for the only empty seat between Caduceus and Beau.

“Good morning,” Yasha murmured as she rounded the table. Her eyelids still drooped with exhaustion she had yet to shake off. But she smiled small and warm at them all, her eyes landing on Beau as she stepped up beside the monk. Fondness made Beau feel like her heart was melting in her chest as she grinned up at Yasha, tipping her head back to catch her eye.

Yasha bent down and planted a quick, sweet peck on Beau’s lips, the monk’s smile curling wider as Yasha pulled away with a murmured, “morning Beau.”

The Aasimar wandered off to the bar a moment later to get a drink, yawning as she did. Beau happily went back to her bacon, picking it into pieces and popping them in her mouth. It took her a few moments to realize that something had changed.

Looking up, Beau froze with bacon halfway to her mouth when she found everyone at the table staring at her in stunned silence. Caleb’s tapping against her knee had ceased, Veth’s mouth was hanging open with sausage half-chewed. Fjord and Caduceus were giving her matching stares that were somehow both knowing and awed. Jester looked as if she were two seconds away from combusting into glitter.

“What?” Beau asked, somewhat defensively.

“Beau!” Jester exploded, squealing loudly. “You didn’t tell me you and Yasha finally talked!”

Beau’s cheeks grew hot, and she put her bacon down slowly. “Talked about what?”

“You kissed Yasha like it was a normal, everyday thing!” Veth said, thankfully swallowing her mouthful of food beforehand. “When did that happen?”

Beau froze, eyes going wide.

Oh.

“Uh...just now.”

“What?” Fjord said, brows furrowing.

“It happened just now,” Beau said, quiet and struck.

“Oh my gosh,” Jester gushed, practically vibrating in her seat. “That was your first kiss with Yasha? And it was that easy? And we all got to see it? That’s so romantic, Beau!”

Beau’s eyes flit to where Yasha stood at the bar. The Aasimar had twisted around to look back at the table, eyes wide and mouth agape. Clearly, she had come to the same realization as Beau. That same fondness from before softened everything in Beau’s countenance near instantly, and she smiled across the tavern at Yasha. She watched the Aasimar blush as she grinned back, turning to the barkeep to order when they came up to Yasha.

“I guess it is pretty romantic,” Beau whispered.

Veth and Jester squealed with each other as Fjord and Caduceus went back to their breakfasts. Caleb gently pinched the inside of Beau’s knee where her leg was still across his lap. He smiled when she looked at him and squeezed her ankle.

Beau’s chest felt full to bursting when she realized that her happiness could spread so easily among this family she had cultivated. She settled into her seat as Yasha came back and held her hand under the table for the duration of their meal.

This was something new Beau wouldn’t mind adding to their routine.

#cr #critical role #beauyasha #beauregard lionett #yasha #m9 #writing #my writing #[shrug emoji]

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seigephoenix · 6 years

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Little Light

Featuring @crazy-bone-lady's Ajun and my Kura. This is set during the Red War. It began cause I'm a huge sucker for kid fics. And it spiraled. Trigger: pregnancy, childbirth (not graphic). Under a cut because I know this isn't everyone's thing, but it is mine. XD

Kura winced as another wave of nausea swept over her. The loss of her Light had been devastating but she hadn’t expected getting a stomach bug. Decades without getting sick was a blessing, one she took for granted. This illness completely wiped her energy stores. Anna had caught her yawning the other day and teased her about sleepless nights with Ajun. She’d turned as red as her hair as she realized they weren’t as subtle as they’d hoped. Anna had meant it in good natured teasing, the Warlock didn’t have a mean bone in her body. She sat down on one of the ledges to let the wave of nausea pass. One of the civilians stopped to ask if she was alright. Kura explained about the nausea as politely as she could.

“Oh yes, when I had my first I would throw up like that all the time. I could fall asleep at the drop of a hat too. Amused my husband cause I’d do it in the middle of talking to his mother.” Kura nodded along. She found herself falling asleep in the oddest spots too. She paused and looked over at the woman.

“Your first?”

“My first child. It gets easier with the second one.” She reached over and patted Kura’s arm.

“Wait, I’m not pregnant. I’m a Guardian. That’s not possible.”

“You’re just like me right now though. Until your friend beats Ghaul. Go check in with a doctor.” She patted Kura’s shoulder in sympathy before she straightened and went back to her family. A thousand thoughts circled Kura’s mind. Could she be pregnant? Her hand rested on her stomach over the armor there, almost on instinct. Pele popped out and twirled her shell as her Guardian sat on the ledge, shell shocked.

“Let me call the doctor before you panic okay?” The Ghost got them a chance to see one of the doctors. It wasn’t sophisticated but they’d set up a rudimentary prenatal area. Some of the civilians had been pregnant when they’d left the City, and there had to be a place to care for them. Kura sat behind one of the curtains after answering the woman’s questions.

Last menstrual cycle. “Umm… I don’t remember.” The nurse clucked her tongue and examined the chart. Symptoms? “Nausea, tired all the time, and I’ve been really moody.” Pele popped out to answer some of the questions. Here. Fill this to the line with urine and bring it back. “Pee? In a cup?” The nurse nodded and swept out of the curtained room.

“I messaged Jali. To let them know we’ll be late tonight.” Pele informed her as they took care of business. The nurse took the cup and Kura waited. After ten minutes her nerves were shot. The doctor came in with his clipboard and sat on the stool by the bed.

“Your results came back. You’re pregnant.” Kura stared at the man in shock. Pregnant? She couldn’t be pregnant! The room spun and she grabbed her head to stop it.

“Kura?” Pele’s worried voice carried over the spinning room.

“Dizziness is normal in some pregnancies. It will pass in a few moments. I should warn you, some women faint. Oh!” The doctor leapt forward as the woman on the table collapsed. “Is there someone you can call?” He looked at the little ball of metal.

“He’s on his way now.” Pele informed the doctor as the man maneuvered Kura onto the small cot. Ajun flung back the curtains and the doctor blinked in surprise. This was one of the Guardians that helped with the patients. “Hey Ajun!”

“What happened?” Ajun felt his heart twist as he saw Kura lying on the cot. His first thought had been she’d been hurt. He didn’t see any injuries on her. Dread settled in the pit of his stomach like a rock as he saw how pale Kura was.

“Strictly speaking, I can’t tell you. Doctor-patient confidentiality.” The doctor stood. “You should get her back to your tent. She’ll need some rest and will be fine.” He left them alone and Ajun pinned Pele with a glare.

“No way. You can let Kura tell you.” He heaved a weary sigh before he leaned down and scooped Kura up in his arms. Her head rolled and rested against his chest, a strong pulse of warmth went through him. He’d move heaven and earth for her. The walk to their tent seemed like an eternity, worry dogged his steps the entire way. He set her down on the makeshift cot in the middle. He refused to leave until she woke up, which only took a few more minutes.

“Kura?” Her eyes searched until they found his face. She smiled and reached up for his face, wanting that connection. “What happened?” He wrapped his fingers around her wrist before pressing a kiss to her palm.

“I’m pregnant.” The words weighed down between them as his mind struggled to wrap around their meaning.

“Pregnant? But we’re Guardians.” She nodded and moved over as he leaned down. Instead of lying beside her, he just pressed his forehead against hers. “But, we’re also Guardians without our Light.”

“I’m sorry.” Kura murmured and jumped when his eyes flew open.

“Sorry for what?”

“I should have been more careful.” Ajun scoffed and he nudged her cheek until she was looking at him again.

“Then it’s both our faults. No one could have predicted this Kura, how could we? Never be sorry with me,” he said as she felt the tears welling up. Traveler’s Light was she going to cry at the slightest thing now? She wrapped her arms around his neck and tugged him down in a tight hug while the tears flowed down her cheeks. He kept his weight off of her, the panic setting in about hurting her.

“I love you. I don’t know the first thing about taking care of kids.” Kura laughed shakily. He shifted so he was beside her, tucking her up against him.

“Well, we’ll hardly be the first parents. We’ll make do.” She laughed at his confident tone. It was a laugh born of relief. She fell back asleep listening to his day, not even noticing when he took her armor off.

The days flowed into weeks and soon there was a small bump. Kura looked at herself in a cracked mirror, the bump pushed her shirt up, exposing her skin. She sighed as that meant she needed more clothing. Pele had studied up on human pregnancy along with Ajun in the intervening weeks. She was as bossy as he was, even as Kura whined about craving something. She’d given her Ghost a nickname, Tiny Tyrant, when she would lecture her about proper nutrition. Kura jumped as arms slipped around her from behind. His lips brushed her ear as his hands slid to the gentle curve of her stomach. The man had been a gigantic mess when he was trying to figure out what was normal for pregnancy. Nothing calmed a Warlock faster than knowledge, so Kura shoved books under his nose to help with that. She did what the doctor suggested in regards to work. Hawthorne had been upset to lose a good scout but she didn’t argue about the necessity of keeping Kura on the grounds. They were making good leeway in defeating Ghaul. Kura hated that she wouldn’t be there for the big fight.

“You’re supposed to be resting,” Ajun scolded as Jali floated next to them. She and Pele had turned into good little look outs, or as Kura called them, snitches. She couldn’t so much as sneak a piece of candy without one or the other letting Ajun know.

“I just wanted to see how much had changed. That’s all.” She turned her head and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. He grinned at her and hustled her out of the room and back to their tent under the pretense of having dinner together. Kura knew his game but it made him feel better. So she played along with it.

When her belly grew she began to feel flutters. The first time had been alarming but the other women assured her it was normal. She’d thought something was wrong when she felt that first gentle push against her stomach. That was her baby she was feeling. Kura had stared down at her stomach in awe as the first few kicks barely registered in her stomach. The second time was stronger and Ajun was sitting next to her. Kura grabbed his hand, interrupting his book, and pressed it against her stomach. She’d finally gotten the opportunity to show him.

“What’s going on?” Then he felt the movement against his palm. His brows drew together before it hit him. “That’s.” Golden eyes met green as she smiled and nodded. Warmth swelled in her as she watched the light brighten his eyes and he had to get closer. The book slipped from his fingers as he went to his knees in front of her.

“It’s the baby. They’re awake now.” She chuckled when he knelt and pressed an ear to the rounded curve. The baby gave one swift kick that they both felt. Ajun laughed as he rubbed the side of his head. Kura laughed deep belly laughs. The baby disliked any stethoscope put on Kura’s stomach. They’d kick it. The first thump had startled the doctor. He’d been amused when he figured out what had happened. He explained it was normal for the baby as it was likely disruptive to their sleep cycle.

Ajun went with her to every appointment he could manage. He’d started to rest his hand on her stomach when they were near each other. Kura enjoyed his company always. Even as he fussed at her for not sitting enough. She knew he was doing it out of love so she didn’t argue. She rolled into her final trimester and disliked the last stage.

She was bored. She was too used to being out and active, and now she was shackled to the camp. It was for the best she knew, but the pull in her blood was strong. Being with Ajun was pure bliss, and he’d backed off the constant hovering after she asked him too. The man was still such a worrywart, he shadowed her everywhere when he wasn’t at his own work. As her belly grew so did his worrying. Kura just felt fat, useless, and incontinent. When Ajun was at work she stayed with the other pregnant women. They understood one another and were able to gripe about things without the burden of worrying their loved ones. She walked back from her gripe fest when she passed by the big barn.

“No shadow today then Firebird?” Shaxx called out to her as she walked past. Hawthorne came down the steps as Kura joined Shaxx in the barn. Suraya was curious about the Guardian, and the other Guardians, that had gotten pregnant. It was an anomaly she was sure. This Guardian had taken the pregnancy in stride while others nearly broke. Suraya wondered why this Guardian seemed so accepting of her fate.

“That’s not nice Shaxx.” Kura’s lips refused to turn into a smile, though it was a close call. Shaxx let out a booming laugh. “Besides, she’s right here.” Pele popped out with a few choice words for Shaxx.

“Take care of yourself Firebird. I don’t want anything to happen to you.” Kura smiled at Shaxx as Hawthorne echoed the statement. She laughed when the pop resounded through her. She’d been having a few cramps off and on, but the doctor had assured her that was normal. Especially as her due date crept closer. The entire Farm was gearing up for their final assault on the City, and she was already resigned to staying behind. It wasn’t a decision she liked but one she understood. Zavala and Cayde had been adamant she stayed behind. Now it looked like the decision was being taken out of her hands. Someone decided that it was their time.

A warm trickle slid down her thighs and she winced as another cramp coiled tight before relaxing in her abdomen. “Guardian, you okay?” Hawthorne stepped forward as Pele spun in alarm.

“Kura! Is it the baby!?” Kura nodded and sent panic flying through the other two. Hawthorne was shaking her head frantically while Shaxx spoke to his Ghost while Kura grasped the side of the barn. She was doubled over from the intensity of the contractions.

“I think the baby decided the day we launch our assault on the City is a great time to be born.” Kura laughed weakly as she walked towards the tent. Shaxx rushed forward and grabbed her up. “Oh for the love of the Light, put me down. I’m pregnant not an invalid.” Kura smacked Shaxx’s shoulder but the Crucible Master didn’t stop until they were in the healer tent. The messenger had beaten them and the rooms were ready. Shaxx set her down as Ajun barreled into the room.

“Kura!” She smiled up at him. She couldn’t stop the wince as another contraction hit but she reached for him. Shaxx left the two and joined the others for the assault. He let them know about the baby.

Kura labored for ten long hours. The pain was too much at some points but she merely clenched her jaw and pushed through it. Ajun had stayed by her side, fretting as the labor progressed. The doctor coached her to push as she gave it everything in her. The tiny screech announced the brand new arrival. “A girl. It’s a baby girl.” The doctor handed the baby up to Kura who tucked her against her chest. A tiny Awoken girl, and she grinned at seeing the shock of red hair on her head.

“A girl!” Pele and Jali cheered as Ajun brought up his hand to cradle the back of her head.

“I’d read that a baby born between a human and Awoken would be Awoken, but I guess I needed to see it. What will we name her?” Kura smiled as she settled the baby against her breast to feed. A pulse deep within her rendered her speechless. The rushing in her ears drowned out everything else.

“The Light! It’s back!” Several Ghosts cheered in the infirmary. Kura smiled down at the suckling baby.

“Ciana. It means ‘light’. Fitting don’t you think?” Kura smiled at Ajun who leaned over and pressed a kiss to her lips.

“Very. For a new life born as we got our Light back. I like it. Ciana, I wonder where your destiny is going to take you?” Ajun murmured as he watched over the two of them.

#destiny #destiny 2 #oc: kura #oc: ajun #kid fic #ppregnancy #tw: childbirth

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znationfanfiction · 7 years

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Tension

Another installment of my Z-Nation fanfic! No stealing, please. It actually took me 2 days and a lot of work to do this, so I’d be super sad and have to hunt you down and steal your soul (kidding…maybe).

Warnings: MATURE LANGUAGE, creepy men, and a tiny little bit of sexual stuff (so awkward to write, even for a married person).

—————–

Over the course of the next couple of days, my nerves are stretched tight. Murphy, of course, is the main reason. Not to mention how everyone in the group keeps looking at me as if I’m about to lose myself and start acting like Murphy’s pet. The only exception is 10k, who isn’t on his guard, but is most definitely coping in his own way. If looks could kill, Murphy would be six feet under by now. He also seems more distant than usual from me…I am somehow magically being paired up with other people for watches and raids, now.

He probably told them to separate us. I thought he cared? What happened to the kiss we had? I couldn’t have been the only one that felt the connection…is it because he sees me as a monster now?

I have no idea what his deal is, but it is ripping my insides apart. What doesn’t help is, of course, Murphy’s part in my nerves fraying. He has kept true to his word about making me his little puppet, of course. Mostly.

We stop off the main route for some R&R, at least for the night. 10k immediately jumps out of the truck to set up a fire, and the rest of us slowly get out of the truck to help. Well, everyone else does. They still want me to relax and heal my shoulder a little more before doing anything, so I sit with Murphy on the tailgate.

The camp is set up swiftly and I hop down from the truck to grab my stuff, thinking about heading to the little stream we passed about five minutes ago to wash up. I briefly lift my nearly-empty canteen to my lips when I feel a slight…pull toward the truck.

I glance toward Murphy. “What are you staring at?” He is slightly squinting at me in concentration. I feel another tug, this time an urge to give him the canteen. My eyes narrow.

“Murphy, you ass, I can feel you in my head. You have your own water. Piss off mine, stop being so lazy, and get your own”.

The urge intensifies tenfold into a full-blown need, and my brow starts to sweat from the effort of resisting. My hand shakes and starts to move toward him, handing him my canteen. I fight for control over my body, losing more and more ground with every passing second. With one last-ditch effort at keeping my free will, I yank the water back to my face and drain the rest of the contents, upending it like a frat boy would a cheap beer.

“Eat my ass”, I grumble to him after I finish, my left eye twitching ceaselessly. I toss the container into my pack and throw it over my shoulder.

There are a few grumbles from the group and I turn to see them all staring at me, even 10k. They must have seen the little stand-off between me and Murphy.

“I’m not his puppet. Satisfied yet? Can y'all stop staring at me now?”, I crab at them, throwing my arms up in frustration.

“Well, at least we know it’s still Tally”, Vasquez huffs out.

Addy just smiles and throws an arm around my shoulders. Warren tries to cover up a small smile. 10k just looks more conflicted than I’ve ever seen him.

———————-

After about 10 minutes, it is decided that 10k will go with me to the stream. The rest of the group will take turns after we take watch for each other. He seems hesitant at first, almost unwilling to go with me, and I feel my eye starting to twitch again.

I stomp off ahead of him. I can still hear him behind me and I know that no Zs will touch him while I have anything to say about it. I have nothing to worry about but his safety, now.

I’m about half-dead, anyway. Fuck it.

I reach the edge of the stream and kick my boots off. I pull my shirt over my head and drop it to the small rocks that surround the stream’s bed and prick the bottoms of my bare feet. I hear a gasp behind me and slightly turn to see 10k’s blushing face snap away from me. His eyes are even wide from the side of his face, and there is no mistaking the awkward little smirk on his face as he purses his lips.

Unbothered by him seeing me, I slide my fatigue pants off and wade into the freezing stream. Modesty went out the window when the world ended, at least for me. I still feel heat creep up my neck in spite of the cold water at the idea of him seeing me naked. It isn’t embarrassment I feel at the idea….it’s more of a pleasure. It’s not like my body is bad or anything. I mean, my breasts aren’t exactly huge, but I still have curves in spite of constant malnutrition.

I go to work scrubbing every inch of my body clean with the cheap shampoo/conditioner/body wash combo the group found in a gas station. It isn’t exactly classy, but it works and my body nearly hums with pleasure at getting clean. The water is a shock to my system, but I grit my teeth and force myself to get over it. I take extra care with my shoulder, ensuring I get it sanitized and wash all the….Murphy saliva….out of it. It’s definitely healing more quickly than I expected. It is already scabbed up, showing both sets of teeth perfectly etched into my skin forever.

I dip my dark hair back into the water, rinsing the soap out of it, and let my body go under the clear water completely. I sit there on the bottom of the stream for a moment, enjoying the peace of the silent world under the water, and how the gentle current moves my hair around my face. Finally, I come back up, letting my curls fall around my shoulders and over my breasts, covering them.

Forget zombie blend. I’m a fucking mermaid, bitches.

The thought makes me smile. I look up to 10k’s stiff form. His shoulders are rigid and I think I can still make out a slight blush on his cheeks and the back of his neck. I wade back to him and my backpack and step out of the water.

“10k”.

He stiffens a little more before relaxing again. His head turns just barely to the side to acknowledge me.

“Before all of this…did you ever, ya know, see a girl naked?”

I know that the group always jokes about him being a virgin and all, but you never know. I was a virgin too, but I let a couple people see me naked before. I was only 15 then, but I’m 18 now, and it’s been a while, dammit.

His eyes widen and he shifts from foot to foot awkwardly. “Ah, erm, no?”

“10k, look at me. It’s okay”, I mutter. I reach my hand out and lightly grasp his shoulder, turning him to face my naked form. His eyes immediately shift to the sky, down to the ground, to the side, and pretty much anywhere I’m not. He licks his lips, which is a habit of his that shouldn’t affect me as much as it does.

I touch his hot cheek. “Hey, it’s okay. It’s just me”. His eyes finally move to me, looking me in the eyes before flashing down and taking in my form, lingering on my hips and breasts.

I slide his rifle back around his back and step toward him, bringing his body closer to mine. I take one of his hands and place it on my bare hip, letting his fingers skim my cool skin. I don’t think his face can get any redder, but it definitely does as I guide his other hand up my torso and toward my chest, letting it go as it reaches my ribs.

He hesitates, hand trembling slightly, before inching it up toward my bare chest and finally cupping my small breast in his calloused hand. My eyes flutter closed at the sensation and goosebumps erupt across my skin. I reopen my eyes and grab the back of his neck before pulling him down to my lips.

A low grunt comes from the back of his throat as my fingers lace into the hair peeking out from the bottom of his red bandana, and one hand glides to my back, exploring up and down my naked flesh, the other hand lightly squeezing my chest. We both pant in between kisses, but don’t break away. One of my hands drifts down his chest, where I can feel the quick, hard rhythm of his heart, to his belt buckle, and then slips down into the front of his pants. My fingers brush something hot and smooth and hard and he jumps lightly, bringing my small form closer to his lean body and groaning softly-

The crack of a branch alerts us both to someone’s presence, and I reach around 10k’s waist to the back of his pants, gripping the pistol lodged there. He raises his rifle and I snap around with the pistol in my hands, searching for the intruder. My heart is still pounding from the sexual tension, and now this new adrenaline has it hammering against my ribcage.

Three men step around a tree, grasping weapons of their own and grinning. They all take in my form, and their grins grow even wider. I feel slimy all of a sudden, like I need another bath, and it’s not at all how I felt when 10k was looking at me. All my internal alarms are blaring…these men don’t feel right. There’s something definitely wrong about them, twisted.

The men’s eyes widen when they see the bitemarks on my shoulder, 10k steps in front of me, shielding me with his own body.

He must have seen their looks too.

“Well, what have we here? Those look like bite marks, and you’re definitely not a Z. Your little boyfriend getting a little rough? Or are you something else?”, the man in the front of the trio drawls. He is scrawny, bony, and half his teeth are missing. The other half are rotting. I make him out as the leader.

Gross.

I move to grab my clean tee, gun still pointed at the men.

“Ah ah ah”, Scrawny nearly hollers. I start and straighten back up, leaving the shirt where it is. “Now don’t go doing that. We wanna play too”. Scrawny’s minions chuckle cruelly and my face heats up. They start to advance on us and 10k racks the bolt of his rifle, stopping them.

“Fuck you”, I spit, “go the fuck back to whatever circle of Hell you crawled out of”.

“Aw, honey, don’t be like that. Why don’t you step around and come with us. I can show you what a real man is like”.

“Okay, first off, gag”, I make a retching sound that causes the men to scowl. “I’m just fine here, thanks”.

The man barks out a laugh. “We weren’t asking, honey. There aren’t many bitches around these days, and we aren’t going to pass this opportunity up. Plus, you might be worth something with those bites.”. 10k tenses up even more than he was and a low growl comes from his gritted teeth.

The men advance again and 10k pulls the trigger, hitting the man to the right of the leader between his eyes and dropping him. Before the others could react with their own shots, I step around 10k and shoot the leader in the neck. He grabs his neck and falls to his knees, drowning in his own blood. 10k picks off the last one while I shoot the leader again, in the head this time.

Once we are sure they are all dead, 10k wraps me in his arms, which presses my face deep into his shirt. I inhale his scent–woods and leaves and something sweet. I didn’t realize before during the standoff, but I’m trembling like crazy, my knees nearly knocking together. After some of my shaking subsides, 10k tosses my clothes at me and then hurriedly bathes (after me ordering him to clean up) while I crouch stiffly by our supplies.

I’m such a monster. Another mark to add to my collection. Why couldn’t they have just left us alone?

I am watching so acutely for any signs of another intruder that I nearly take out 10k when he approaches me, fully clothed.

“Whoa, it’s just me”, he raises his hands slightly in a surrender. I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding and roll my eyes.

He reaches out and runs his thumb over my shirt where my shoulder marks are, his face growing sad. “I’m so sorry this happened to you, Tally. I should have protected you…”

“Is that why you’ve been avoiding me? You think this is your fault?”, I gesture to my wounds. “Well, it’s not. I would die protecting you. That’s on me. That’s my decision. You would do the same, and I know it, so don’t feel guilty. I’m still alive for now, and I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with you distancing yourself from me”.

“Okay. I’m sorry…I just-after what happened to Cassandra…I just hate the idea of having to mercy you too”, he says. He looks away from me, and I step forward, grabbing his face in both my hands.

“I’m not Cassandra…so can I have my watch buddy back? Can we move forward and past this?”, I nod toward my bites.

“I know”, he nods, “And okay. I’ll try. I promise”. He gazes at my face for a long time before pulling me in for a light kiss. “Come on, we have to get back to the group”.

He catches me looking back toward where the bodies of the men are and grabs my hand, squeezing it.

“Its not your fault, Tally…”

“I guess. But three more humans are dead…I killed another human. When will it end?”

He grabs my arm and pulls me close to him again, and in spite of everything, I finally feel safe for the first time in years

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