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cucullas · 4 years

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Mudarra González: a mixed medieval hero

I’m apparently doing a series on Spanish Romances (Spain medieval and renaissance anonymous folk ballads), usually my favorites ones are about love, family or everyday life. I’m not very much into the epics of killing infidels, El Cid and The Song of Roland got it covered. That’s why I initially was not attracted to the Song of the Seven Princes of Lara.

I was so so SO wrong. This story has it all, petty family squabbles, completly disproportinionate reaction and my mixed bastard main boy: Mudarra Gonzalez. On the realm of medieval fiction where the main concern is how many infidels The Heroic Christian Knight can kill, Mudarra is a Moor, he is the Heroe That Was Promised and he is out for revenge.

The petty story: family drama and no Mudarra yet

Before I start a little bit of story, as you might know the Iberian Peninsula, was partially controlled by Arab and Berber Muslims rulers. From mighty cultured caliphates to dying city-kingdoms, this period called Al-Andalus went from 700 to 1492. During this time Christian kingdoms of Spain had to live with their Muslim neighbours and very often enemies.

In these context our story starts, a Christian Knight, Gonzalo Gustios is the ruler of Salas, he is vasall of the Count Garcia Fernandes and is marries to Doña Sancha. He had a good life and is a not getting any younger but that’s ok cause he got 7 valiant sons to suceed him. They all have names of prowesses... but that’s not that important cause they all die.

Yeah, because you see they had a fight with their aunt Doña Lambra (wife of their mom’s brother Rodrigo de Lara): honor was insulted... A pepper filled with blood was trown and someone menaced to cut a skirt above the knee and those are clearly irreparables offenses so Gonzalo Gonzalez the younger Prince killed a man over the pepper and Doña Lambra promised to revenge.

Rodrigo, Doña Lambra husband them betrayed his nephews giving the enemy information about their battle plans. They all die. His father is captured but pardoned by Almanzor. While in captivity Gonzalo is asked to recognize the heads of some important Christian the Moor army just killed... its of course his 7 kids and he mad with grief. Long story short he sleeps with Almanzor sister, she gets pregnant, he is later release and goes back to his wife.

All the Spanish medieval gore we deserve

Saddly he is too old for revenge and Doña Lambra is a close family member to the ruling Count. In many version Gonzalo is later disable and very weak by pain or captivity/war. Who could save us now?

Mudarra, bastard extraordinaire

Now let’s talk about Mudarra the first time we see him he is showed playing chess a stereotypical oriental game and talking with the also Muslim king of Segura. He has a great position in court but when he is insulted as “hijo de nadie/ Nobody son” he decides to go search for his father.

Antonio Tempesta, a Renaissance Italian illsutrator doing his best to represent a Moor medieval armyhe went from pseudo-Turkish clearly (Mudarra taking leave of his mother)

From Mudarra POV it’s like leaving idk Camelot/King’s Landing/a US middle class family to go and meet your dad a disable owner of a rundown farm in a backwards land. But that’s ok, Mudarra does his best is like

“Nice to met you Sir Gonzales, I’m your son”

“I’ve literally never seen this kid. No way it’s mine”

And this fools no one specially not his wife Doña Sancha because A) Mudarra looks exactly like Gonzalo Gonzalez his late bro and B) In some version Gonzalo Gustios actually gave Mudarra mother a ring.

Gustios is afraid his wife will be mad but Doña Sancha is no mad at all. Specially when Mudarra promise to avenge his late older brothers. She acts as the coolest step-mom and they even do a ceremony so Mudarra becomes his father legitimate heir.

Personally I like Mudarra a lot, he is much more measured that his brothers: he takes time to explain he is without getting mad, ask for justice to the Count (in some version) and is even courteous to his enemy. I bet he wouldn’t kill an unharmed servant over a pepper but that’s speculation on my part.

Yes, he also has a manly revenge speech at the end:

“Tú los vendistes, traidor, en el val de Araviana / mas, si Dios a mí me ayuda, aquí dejarás el alma / vengare a mis hermanos, los siete infantes de Lara [...] Morirás aquí traidor / a las maños de Mudarra”

“You sold them you traitor, in the Araviana valley / with God’s help here you will lay your soul / I will avenge my brothers, the Seven Princes of Lara. [...] You die here traitor, at the hands of Mudarra”

Then of he goes to kill Rodrigo de Lara. He suceeds, because he is our hero but also because Rodrigo won’t be able to pact with the Moors like he did the 1st time because they won’t risk getting into Mudarra and Almanzor bad side. Doña Lambra in some version is burnt but in most “her punishement was left to God” because as we said she was family with the count.

After the revenge we don’t know a lot about Mudarra which is a shame. He is said to have been an excellent knight though.

A place said to be the tomb of Mudarra with 0 reasons, it’s pretty too

Mudarra, raised as a Moor is our triumphant here, and it was not done only for the exoticism value, him being a Royal Moor is a big deal. Here is why.

A Royal Bastard

Gonzalo Gustias leaving to go back to his land is not seem as an offense to Almanzor sister (called Aisha sometimes, she is a fictional character). She doesn’t seem to have problems with it and Mudarra growns up on King Almanzor court as his heir, he knights him and give his squires to serve him.

But you might ask who is Almanzor? Is he fictional? Well, no, he is no King but he absolutely existed.

Bust of Almanzor in the Castillan city of Catalañazor were Spanish say he suffer a great defeat by Christian troops... it’s probably not true.

He is The big deal. His name is Abu Amir Muhammad but the is nicknames Al Mansur, the Victorious. You see at the time from 950 to 1000 the main kingdom of the are is the Caliphate of Cordoba, the King is Hisam II but his minister and de facto ruler is Almanzor. An incredible capable military leader and politician.

Almanzor embodies the mighty caliphate of Cordoba. Almanzor with an inteligent politic of alliances and a lot of Berber mercenaries he kept the peace and prosterity of the caliphate of Cordoba. Almanzor will have two son, after their rule the Caliphate desintegrate in taifas, he is also the embodiement of the a glorious period. A high king.

A king more important than Count Garcia Fernandes, the Christian ruler of this story. In other countries Roland is the nephew of Charlemagne. The French lineage of Lusignan descend from a fae and everyone descends from Alexander the Great. But in this Castille the best thing we have is Almanzor, descending from a King gives Mudarra the power of an army his father doesnt have and also a symbolic power to change stablishment.

Roof of the former mosque now Catedral of Cordoba

Oh and also I have this theory that Almanzor life could have also inspired the story, mostly his second son who was also the de facto ruler: Abd al-Raḥmān called ibn Sanchul or Sanchuelo this nickname came because he apparently really looked like his granpa...the King of Plamplona Sancho Garces II. Almanzor attacked his kingdom and as the Christian king could not possibly win he came himself as an ambassador asking for protection and bringing incredible gifts. Almanzor accepted and even took Urraca Garces, Sancho daughter as wife.

In Burgos they take their legend seriously

While romances, written later in time show a black and white version of the Al-Andalus and Reconquista that was in truth extremely complexe.Mudarra story is an exception. Authors like the great Irene Zaderenko have even called his romance “maurophilo”. I agree, I love the Moors I love Mudarra and I love this soap opera of a Romance. that has tragically the name of the Princes and is not called “El Romance de Mudarra” as it should.

If i convinced me with my Mudarra propaganda you can: Read the first incomplete version of the story (ESP) the romance of the Complaint of Doña Lambra (ESP) and the song of The Revenge of Mudarra (ESP).. thanks for your attention

#romancero viejo #los siete infantes de lara #spanish literature #spanish music #medieval romances #mudarra gonzalez

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succubused · 4 years

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I know nothing about jojo. Teach me it out of context

part 1 phantom blood. um jonathan (British) has some personal problems with his adopted brother dio brando (also british) and then dio kills their dad and becomes a vampire. jonathan gets shounen powers and a guy survives for like fifteen minutes after being cut in half. dio gets decapitated so jonathan went and got married but then dios decapitated head appeared on the boat and was like jonathan i respect you so i want to use your decapitated body as my own. and jonathan was like dude thats kind of fucked up but the boat blew up and dio did it anyway. erina survived though

im putting these under a cut cause it got long as fuck but heres your jojo summaries

part 2 battle tendency is like. joseph who is jonathans thotty grandson teams up with caesar zeppeli (italian) (gay) to defeat the pillar men which include kars (milf) esidisi (milfs live in boyfriend) wamuu (adopted son). another milf called lisa lisa trains them into their shounen powers and then esidisi shows up and kills the teachers aides and possesses lisa lisas assistant and then dies. basically they all get into this arena deathmatch involving zombie horses and kars grows wings and runs around all sexy for a little bit before getting launched into space. caesar gets crushed by a stone cross after making a gay ass speech. love loses. also it turns out lisa lisa was josephs mom the whole time.

part 3 stardust crusaders i kind of hate but i love the characters so basically jotaro kujo (josephs grandson) um he gets his stand and hes like whats this evil spirit i have to be locked in prison for everyones protection. and then his mom gets a stand too but sike women arent people so shes going to die. this is of course dios fault and they have to kill dio. kakyoin tries to kill jotaro and then jotaro pulls the worm out of his head and theyre best friends after that. polnareff tries to kill avdol and avdol sets him on fire and theyre [redacted] after that. they all go on a wacky roadtrip to cairo to kill dio during which kakyoin feeds a baby its own shit and avdol fakes his death for a little over a week. killing dio doesnt go great and vanilla ice sucks avdol into the void and kills their dog iggy and i hate watching that part. kakyoin is crushed under the weight of his own hubris. dio thinks hes sexy for being able to stop time but jotaro can also stop time and he kills dio. jotaros very traumatized due to the entire experience. for some reason both polnareff and joseph survive. the end

part 4 diamond is unbreakable is basically josuke higashikata whos josephs kid out of wedlock hunting down a serial killer with a hand fetish. jotaro is there hes a marine biologist now and josuke is technically his uncle. theres also josukes best friend okuyasu theyre a lil gay but thats alright we like them. also got short king koichi and yukako. and evil twink mangaka rohan. its like murder mystery except a lil more fucked up cause its jojo. ultimately kira (murderer with hand fetish) gets his ultimate powers that manipulate time and space but it doesnt even matter cause josuke has protagonist disease okuyasu dies for like 10 mins but he gets better. kira gets punched into the street by jotaro and then an ambulance runs him over and he dies.

part 5 vento aureo is giorno giovanna whos dios kid but hes also jonathans kid bc dio fucked with jonathans body and thats how giorno was born. he kind of acts like dio if dio had jonathans moral code and hes blond. anyway hes 15 and he joins the mafia because he wants to end heroin abuse and he ends up getting god timespace manipulation powers and killing the boss diavolo but half of his friends are killed horribly so that sucks. and then he becomes the don of the italian mafia. and hes still 15. also polnareff is there for a minute he gets killed sort of but his ghost possesses a turtle so hes giornos turtle after that i guess.

part 6 stone ocean my favorite part cause theres finally lesbianism. jolyne who is jotaros daughter is in prison bc she got framed for murder by her boyfriend. jotaros been an absent father due to him having personal problems. he shows up to break her out of prison but he gets his soul and his stand turned into discs and pulled out of his head and he goes into a coma and most of the rest is jolyne trying to get the discs back. she has 2 girlfriends called hermes and foo fighters who is technically a mass of sentient plankton. weather report (sexy) and anasui (ugly) are also there. the main antagonist is pucci who is a priest and was also dios best friend when he (pucci) was 16 for some reason. by the end they get jotaros discs back and pucci successfully starts manipulating reality itself and it turns out weather report was his brother all along and their backstory is REALLY fucked up and then jotaro comes back and anasui is like jotaro can i marry your daughter and hes like no and then everyone gets killed and pucci resets the universe but emporio the ten year old theyve been hanging out with gets weather reports stand and uses it to follow pucci through the universe resets and he ends up creating one where pucci never existed. it ends with “irene” kujo meeting hermes and anasui/weather report are also there. its implied that this is a new universe where none of the bad shit ever happened. emporio is crying. it kind of sucks

part 7 steel ball run i really dont know how to summarize but basically johnny joestar whos like alt universe jonathan but actually not really like that at all. hes also paralyzed from the waist down and he wishes he wasnt. um he meets an italian (gyro zeppeli) and they go on a horse race across america to track down the body of christ. they meet diego brando whos like dio but hes more about class warfare than megalomania and hot pants who has a stand that lets her turn her flesh into spray. diegos stand is that he can turn himself and other living things into dinosaurs. johnny can shoot his fingernails like bullets. anyway they end up fighting the president of the united states (funny valentine) who was trying to turn lucy steele whos only like 14 into a vessel for the corpse of jesus or something and he kills gyro and hotpants and diego and johnnys like this sucks but sends him into an infinite death loop bc hes a dimension hopper but he just keeps dying over and over again in any dimension he goes into. and he deserved it

part 8 jojolion i havent read but gappy seems like a nice guy

#jjba #think i got brain damage #vulturousculturalist

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teatitty · 5 years

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Rogues Lore

First of all I want to thank @schweeeppess for letting me spam her with Rogues lore 2 months ago cuz it made this post so much easier to type out when I can just copy-paste everything and then edit it to be more cohesive lmao

Second this is under a read more because it is A Lot

Leonard Snart AKA Captain Cold

He grew up with a super abusive father and his only refuge was when he would hang out with his grandfather in his grandfather's ice truck. When the grandfather died, he grew tired of his dad's abuse and set out to start a criminal career and moved to central.

(He's the one who started the rogues!)

He found blueprints for a "cold gun" which he ended up making from scratch (it’s also canon that he knows the gun so well he can remake it out of scraps in about 30 seconds to a minute) and had three main rules in his group: No Killing, No Harm To Women Or Children and No Drug Use. His cold gun is capable of interfering with the speedforce cuz it can reach “absolute zero” which is even colder then Mr Freeze's tech.

He's also the only cold-based villain capable of mastering this temp. In New Earth he was described as an "adversary" but in Prime Earth (same backstory as before mind you) he's described as being a straight villain whose only rule in the group is "no killing" (which seems to be a pretty flexible rule these days cuz DC has made him more, well, down with killing). He's also much younger here then he was in NE.

In Flash 2016 #17 we see another upgraded version of his gun that's capable of separating the Flash from the speedforce directly and, in doing so, causing Barry excrutiating pain. Generally, he and Barry had more respect for eachother in NE, to the point that Len even considered him family. In PE, though they have teamed up now and again, Len is far more hostile towards Barry, sometimes even being written in a way that suggests he wouldn’t mind if Barry died.

Sam scudder AKA Mirror Master (the first one!)

He was a simple convict who just really wanted to learn how to get inside a mirror's reflection. He practiced in a hall of mirrors and, once he succeeded, became Mirror Master. He was a frequent foe for Barry and, during Crisis on Infinite Earths, died around the same time Barry did.

He was the one who discovered the "mirror world". At one point he got himself trapped there and hated that the mirror world could just get him whatever he wanted instead of him stealing it so he got Barry to bust him out. He could also use mirror's to mind control ppl (dont ask) and this intrigued Barry.

On PE he's dating Lisa Snart (Len's younger sister) and is the only Mirror Master to exist. In N52 he, Len, Lisa, Mick and Marco all got fused with their weapons for a while and given meta-human abilities which I. hate because it took away what made them all so cool (I'm fine with Marco tho and you'll find out why in a minute) he's also a really big attention seeker lol

Hartley Rathaway AKA Pied Piper

Alright most of Hartley's info is from NE so: he was born deaf to wealthy parents who got him very high-tech hearing implants. He became obssessed with sounds and started experimenting with sonic technology. Bored of his rich life (and sometimes it's implied he had ableist and/or homophobic parents too) he took to a life of crime after learning how to hypnotize people through music (Pied Piper ayyy).

He was the first person to ever successfully break out of Iron Heights and did so because he befriended the rats there and used them to help himself escape, adding more to his whole Pied Piper thing. After Barry died he gave up crime and started working to help the poor and underprivelaged (I'm not saying he quit specifically bc of Barry's death buuuuuut most of the Rogues did so).

He struck up a close friendship with Wally and came out as openly gay! On PE all that we know for certain is that he's a "reformed vigilante" who's the conductor for the Central City orchestra. He used to share an apartment with Barry (yes for real) before he moved in with his bf, David Singh (also Barry's director in the CCPD). Lisa was the one who convinced him to come out to the Rogues, and they were all chill with being gay, their problem came when he started dating David who is, you know, a cop.

He has a pet rat called Moon (cute, right?). Also in pre-N52 canon (cant remember if it was NE specifically or older) Hartley once had a nervous breakdown after Barry arrested him so Barry took him to get help at a mental health hospital :')

(Some artists draw him blonde, some brunette and others go more for reddish-brown it’s kinda confusing)

Marco/Mark Mardon AKA Weather Wizard

On NE he's a two bit criminal called Mark Mardon (he's also white and yes thats important to note) but one day, after escaping from a cop van, he ran to find his brother, Clyde, who was a scientist only to discover his bro had died of a heart attack (however, there's implications that he actually murdered his brother and simply blocked out the memory).

He then found Clyde's notes on how to create a wand to control the weather and made it for himself. The worst he ever did on NE was imprison a town in winter and after Barry's death he went into semi-retirement (told you the Rogues all did this)

On PE however! He and Clyde are Latino and are the heirs to a huge cartel! Clyde takes over the cartel and Marco wants nothing to do with that life. After their father dies, Marco runs away and eventually becomes Weather Wizard.

He comes back when he hears his brother has been murdered and gets accused of the crime. He finds out it was Clyde's wife, Elsa, who orchestrated the whole thing and, in a fit of grief and anger, kills her with lightning. He also tries to kill himself at the same time but it doesn’t work. After her death, he curls up into a ball and starts crying because he feels like he hasnt got any family left but then Lisa shows up and is like "yo the rogues are still here for you bitch"

His emotions affect the weather in this continuity and I’m a weak bitch for that but that’s 100% my bias for Ororo Munroe showing itself lol

James Jesse AKA Trickster (the first one!)

James Jesse was born to the Flying Jesses, famous circus performers. He, however, was afraid of heights, and preferred reading stories of Western criminal Jesse James.

He invented air-walking shoes to get rid of his acrophobia, and this led to his fame as an aerialist at the circus. Buuut he wanted more excitement in life and became a conman instead! He had a lot of wacky gadgets like exploding teddy bears and, after Barry's death, moved from Central to Hollywood and started working in special effects.

Like Hartley, he even attended Barry's funeral. He once beat the devil, Neron, at his own game and eventually started using his skills for good, collecting weapons of incarcerated villains so they couldnt fall into the wrong hands. He eventually died protecting Hartley during Final Crisis. Deadshot was the one who got him.

On Prime Earth his parents were straight up neglectful and, instead of creating his own boots, he stole them from STAR labs instead. This version of him is also WAY more fucked up and murdery then NE to the point us long-term Rogues fans got really upset at how much DC had changed him

On NE his real name is “Giovanni Giuseppe” (swear this is, like, the only italian name DC knows) and on PE the Flying Jesse's were a deliberate rip off of the Flying Graysons

George “Digger” Harkness AKA Captain Boomerang

The illegitimate son of an American toy-maker, W.W. Wiggins, and an Australian woman, Betty Harkness, George Harkness was raised in poverty in the small town of Kurrumburra, Australia. His stepfather, Ian Harkness, hated the boy and made his life miserable. (Like canonically Ian was an abusive alcoholic and even abused Betty who was too ill to defend herself or George. The reason George goes by "Digger" is cuz that's what his mom used to call him before she died; it's aussie slang for "soldier")

In school, Harkness crafted a boomerang. He discovered he had great skill with the aboriginal weapon and often used it for mischief with his best friend, Mick Wentworth. He further honed his skills while spending some time hiding from the law in the Australian bush.

When Digger was eighteen, he and Wentworth robbed a general store and were able to make their escape with the aid of Digger’s boomerang. However, this incident caused Digger’s stepfather to kick him out of the house.

His mother gave him a plane ticket to Central City and told him to get in touch with Wiggins. Wiggins had been searching for a spokesman for W.W. Wiggins Game Company's latest product, a toy boomerang. Under the alias "George Green", Digger auditioned for and got the job. Wiggins outfitted him with a costume and gave him the name "Captain Boomerang."

Ridiculed by the audience, he took to a life of crime instead.

His story is pretty much the same on PE. The only diff being there was no childhood friend and Digger made boomerangs in an attempt to impress his absentee father. Also he has a habit of making up fake stories about himself lmao

The only one's he really doesnt stab in the back are the Rogues and Harley Quinn but everyone else? fair game. In Flash: Rebirth he and Barry even exchange favours for info and it’s implied this is a regular thing for them

Roscoe Dillon AKA The Top

He technically appears on PE but he's one of Thawne's acolytes so lets just. Skip that and focus on NE instead

Literally his whole thing is that he was obssessed with spinning tops as a kid and taught himself how to spin fast enough to deflect bullets. He became a criminal, tried to blackmail the entire world once, and was Lisa's first boyfriend!

He was also her ice-skating coach and taught her how to spin super well like himself! He has a very confusing characterization tho cuz sometimes he was written to be all about revenge and killing but other times he was just like the other rogues; a blue-collar criminal who stole things because he liked to.

He died eventually which I'm not going to try to explain cuz it's...yeah. There's also this whole thing where he could possess people after his death but this was in the silver age and that shit just happened sometimes so whatever

In short: Roscoe has a really cool concept to him but nobody really knew how to write him so he ended up all over the place

He also has a Spinning Top shaped satellite in space where he stores all his loot (dont ask)

Mick Rory AKA Heatwave

Mick Rory has pyromania! Very severely! He was born on a farm outside of Central and, as a child, was very fascinated with fire. This turned into an obssession and he ended up burning his house down. So fascinated by the flames, however, he never ran to get help, watching his whole house burn down (and killing his parents inside) and he ended up living with his uncle after this.

On a schooltrip, his schoolmate stuck him in a meat locker as a prank where he gained Cryophobia (fear of the cold) so in retaliation Mick locked the boy in his house and set the thing on fire (again, pyromania). He ran away again and ended up becoming a fire-eater for a circus. That didn't last long either because, surprise!, he burned the place down.

Desperate to find a way to help his obssession, he happened to see the Rogues operating in Central and decided to take up villainy. At first he and Len got into a few altercations with eachother due to Mick's fear of the cold but eventually they settled their differences and Len officially brought him into the Rogues.

Mick kinda relies on them to keep his pyromania in check basically. There was a time where he was, briefly, reformed and gained a close friendship with Barry (even being roommates with him. By then he'd already known Barry's real identity for a few years) and used his pyro knowledge to become a fire-fighter consultant. At one point he even worked for the FBI

His backstory is practically the same on PE the only difference being that he never expressed regret for burning down his house, and actually says he wishes he’d burned down the whole neighbourhood instead

Lisa Snart AKA Golden Glider

When I say her NE version is leagues above PE I mean it.

Like Len, she suffered abuse under their father and escaped it by becoming a figure skater under the name Lisa Star for the Futura Ice Show! Her fame came from her very fast spins, a trick she was taught by Roscoe. When Roscoe died while fighting Barry (brain complications though there’s more to it, but again I’m not going to get into that) Lisa turned to villainy, blaming Barry for her lover's death.

Her attempts on Barry and Iris' lives were always foiled. She used a pair of ice skates that created their own ice flow, and had many gadgets that caused hypnotism. She also stole Len's gun once but retooled it into a twirling Baton.

When Barry died she renounced her feud with him and attempted to go straight again with her brother. They created a company that recovered lost or stolen items. Eventually she returned back to a life of crime, went through three boyfriends, all using the name Chillblaine (she named them that iirc), until the fourth Blaine killed her. Len got revenge on that one

On PE, however, Lisa had a brain tumor (it got cured later) and was a tag-a-long villain for her brother and her boyfriend, Sam Scudder. This version of her never became a skater and is instead murderous just for...the sake of it. She also has this thing about wanting to be the leader of the Rogues instead of Len, and when she's in charge of them for a while the Rogues’ morals change and killing is suddenly fine so. Whatever. NE Lisa is the best (also her whole outfit? Stunning)

Roy G. Bivolo AKA Rainbow Raider (not technically a Rogue anymore but he was a member for a while)

He appeard on PE as Chroma but gets murdered by Grodd so we only have NE canon to use (they did my mans dirty)

He was a wonderful painter from an early age but was born colourblind. His father, an optometrist, was determined to create a device that would let him see in full colour. Toy didnt get the device until after his father's death but unfortunately the device didnt let him see colour.

Instead, the goggles could project beams of light that could become solid objects, make him invisible, blind his opponents, or affect the emotions of his targets. Angry that he couldnt pursue an artistic career. he decided to become a thief and primarily stole famous artwork. He was eventually killed by Amunet Black

Evan McCulloch AKA Mirror Master (second one)

Evan was born to rich parents Louis and Carol Erikson who gave him up for adoption because they were too young to be responsible parents. He ended up at the McCulloch orphanage.

At age 8 he was molested by one of the older boys there and, in self-defence, ended up drowning the him. At 16 he left the orphanage, taking on the name of the woman who raised him and moves to Glasgow (he’s scottish btw)

He found that it was super difficult to hold down a job but, needing to make ends meet and constantly breaking the law anyway, he turned to a life of crime and became a hitman and then a professional assassin.

One day he got hired to kill his birth father but was unaware of who his target was until after he took the shot. Grief-stricken, he attended the funeral and tried to work up the nerve to approach his birth mother. By the time he had, she'd committed suicide and he turned himself in for his crimes.

Either the Scottish or US government gave him Sam's old Mirror Master gear and hired him to be a mercenary.

His first job was scaring Animal Man into stopping his activism, but he failed because of Animal Man’s wife. Refusing to actually kill the wife and children (thanks to his own morals) he gets fired and helps Animal Man seek revenge.

He continues to work as a criminal and supervillain-for-hire, even working out of costume as a mercernary in Britain.

Eventually he found his way to Central City and joined the Rogues, taking over as Sam Scudders official successor. There was a time where he had a Cocaine Addiction which caused friction between him and Capt Cold because of Len’s rule against drug use.

Throughout all of this, Evan made sure to donate a portion of all the money he ever got to the McCulloch Orphanage

Axel Walker AKA Trickster (second one)

On PE, Axel was recruited by the Rogues early on in his career. He messed up during a heist and they kicked him out (they'd never do that but w/e)

He worked for Mob Rule as a henchman for a bit then went freelance when MB was arrested. He saved Cold's life cuz he felt he still owed Cold a debt. When Grodd took over Central, Axel tried to join his side but Grodd tore his arm off from the bicep (ouch) and left him to die on the street. Axel got himself a cool sleek robot arm and returned to crime anyway. He got accused of murder, Barry cleared his name, but he still got sent to Iron Heights for other charges.

The Rogues, hearing about this, went to bust him out and were like "okay fine u can hang with us" and he stayed with them from then on

In NE canon, while Jesse was working with the FBI, Axel stole all his gear and ended up working for Penguin in Gotham. Penguin gets attacked by Tarantula, Axel fails to stop her and a few days later he gets caught by Robin (Tim) for causing trouble in Gotham.

He moves on to work with Amunet Black, but after her defeat is offered to join the “new Rogues” by Capt Cold and accepts the offer. Some stuff happens, he fights the OG Trickster who leaves him in a dumpster and tells him never to pick up the gear again, then Axel answers an ad from some college students asking for a trained hero to teach them some things, he has dinner with them and then kills them all. Neat.

When Jesse died, Axel redonned the Trickster gear and started operating his own crew out of an old Rogues hideout. When the Rogues returned to Central, Axel found out they were gonna retire and go underground. He rejoined them to help them get revenge on Inertia for manipulating them into killing Bart Allen, and he stayed with the group henceforth.

Evan explained to him that joining the Rogues wasn’t a matter of him wanting to be one, but why he needed to be one

In short: Axel is a punk kid who wants to fit in with the big boys and the Rogues are the only ones who really gave him a chance, acting like his older siblings. It’s worth noting that canon never mentions any relatives for him so, as far as we know, crime is all he’s ever known

And that’s all of them!

#random facts #the rogues #this took. so long to do #good luck reading it all lmao!#god i'm tired #i love them a whole lot can you tell?#tw: abuse mention #tw: drug addiction mention #tw: assault mention

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cold-iron-burns · 5 years

Text

We've come to a consensus.

Everyone present at the time of this writing will do their best to inform the ones who need the support of a gentle delivery of current events.

The ayes have it.

YOU WOULD HAVE A PARLIAMENT AS YOUR COMMUNICATION SPACE

what's wrong with that? if we all actually do our jobs, so many more of us will be represented

THATS A LOGICAL ARGUEMENT, BUT WHO IS REALLY GETTING REPRESENTED

-wait WhAt?! HoW mAnY oF yOu ArE tHeRe

Oh honey, more than you will ever know. It's gonna be okay. We found each other and that's what's important. We're gonna start introducing ourselves,

*or at least, becoming more clear*

I love all of you so much, thank you so much for letting me in, for being patient with me. I think I'm the host? what iss. @ -o{oo#t?

started dissociating, it felt physically painful. the documenter.

And the enchanting lady is? *turns to tip his hat and wink at the camera* A -name-? Do you honestly think I could have settled on any name? Any singular--yes, Zed is going to sleep. I'm very fond of him. Attracted to him? He is my Adonis. Every inch of his body is particularly unique to his position in spacetime. There will never again be a Zed in which he appears, feels, smells and tastes exactly the same as he does at this exact moment, continued, forever and so on, as far as you know, infinitely. The Philosopher.

Wait, no, the Philanthropist

Wait wait NO, I stand by The Philosopher (for now)

[hold up, are y'all tellin me -- you c'n cawl me your White Trash Sweetheart, get rid of that bracket there, that's for the Host now

she doesnt know if she's the host or not, wibblywoooooo~ teen punk brat? aww man, fuck you you stupid piece of shit

hiiii yeah hi, I'm post-apocalypse punk Mayor (yes, you can call me that, but its aspirational) wow very humble -- golf commentater (now based on ugh this is important remember the actress' name, you look stupid, don't just stand there staring off into space, GET BACK TO WORK

OH YEAH, hi BiTcH --oh he's gone, that's -too- bad. well, as I'm here anyway, we should get to know one another. I'm "sassy black woman" because you're ashamed people will think you're using me just for drama and that's pretty fuckin racist--

I'm Final Form Chie. I started as so many of our seeds do, a poor slave girl, who loses her virginity yeah it's okay to make shortcuts

FOCUS

she gains skills, proves useful to the master, destroys the master (sometimes with kindness sometimes literally depending on what we need at the time)

[I didn't know it was that specific]

I'm mixed, actually, but I'm inspired SO MUCH by Claws. FUCKING REPRESENTATION FINAL--

>nope nope nope, shut it down<

John Cleese?

not exactly. A bit like the entire cast of monty python rolled into one. I'm from the countryside, but I can't say for sure where

woooooo we almost lost her there. she was panicking about losing this productive high, but she pulled through and FOUND THAT RUBI. Small Town Beauty Queen. I don't find it insulting if it helps you remember me. I started as Fern of Charlotte's Web. I keep that mournful lullaby for you. It really changed your path, dear heart. I don't become Miss America or anything, I'm too old by that time. But I love my family so much. You have so much anger

Yes, that's right, Dearie. Maiden, Mother, Crone. We don't think it was intentional but we like the power we have when we cooperate. Yes, we guide ... oh honey, don't cry, it's gonna be okay. no, n-n-no, no, you don't h-h-have to oh no, I really don't want to be here, I wasn't sure what to wear before, oh, I've gotten comfortable and I'm stuttering less. No, I don't think people who stutter in real life have this drastic of

oh, oh my. oh no, I'm still Achates.

Does it really surprise you? Chie and Amaury loved me so much that they couldn't bear to part entirely. They feel loyal to answer when you call on them when recalled in memories; they consider it their duty to fight in sharing our stories! With Pictures!

I don't need pictures

Don't you? you need to sleep, you're exhausted and you have an appointment tomorrow. Please go the fuck to bed. Slightly Extra (okay kinda actually just really ~(EXTRA)~

okay how do I... Ah, I got it. I'm the lucky early gen x mom you both wish you had -- no, we are not combined, sugar tits.

I'm the hardass 70s-80s mom you would have had if you're life was a movie. Well, technically I can mask as any kind of 70s-80s media mom (one of y'all--us! oh, yes, i hear you. I want you to know I would protect you, Kevin. MOM UGH

keep going - the sprites (soot or rainbow, we shift to suit your needs. we might steal your shoes. we are only some of the fae court. crossover unknown cannot compute - PLEASE HURRY. GOOD. I AM THE ROBOT OF THE 80s and --scratch that record

I'm that part of you who knew she couldn't look like Zach Morris and wanted so badly just to be a little boy. You were SO CONNECTED with the host when I was there?

wait, I'm the host

no, you--you are now because writing takes concentrating which you are losing quickly. Hello! I'm Sassy Progressive Upper Class CONCENTRATE, DAMMIT. GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. I don't care if I sound like -your-mom. Someone has to be the mom around here!

Someone has to be the mom around here.

Who wrote it?

you are high af.

keep letting your eyes go out of focus, yes you're getting sleepy, think how nice the bed will feel on that aching body. She deserves some rest, the old girl.

My body is a cow? wait, there's more. she shifts to being omniscient for scenes, if a cowsona (oh, yes, Buana and Gaushala and Pirwa ... Gaushala still has an arrow in the heart.

Yes, WoW Chie (Chiela will do.). I was here while you built your confidence to try... yes, dear, you really should sleep. TO TRY GETTING CATRIN AND RIAIN A HOME AFTER being abandoned when some of you lost the "spark" or whatever with Michael. I orchestrated some of the setup. you don't need to know my name. I'm both Italian immigrant/WHOA DO NOT EVEN CONNECT THE JEWISH COMMUNITY TO--NO, We Dont...*clears throat, drinks water*. No, you're not wealthy like Ms. Maisel, -we-, sorry, sometimes I have to pretend. Speaking of pretending, no, kid, I'm not as funny or talented as all the wonderful Jewish actresses (yeah yeah, Italian-American you, whatever his+her names are, we'll get to you later)

oh nooooo they're not sure if they'll fit the stereotype if they get loud but they wanna

yeah, sure kid, we sound a lot alike. we exist in a liminal space in which America (and new york city) (and every big american metropolis)... we can all celebrate our differences

It's alright, you just need to focus. I'm 90s Successful Well Paying Professional (I can be in the late 80s WA>T)

you're just stating tropes you stupid bitch

whale!

MISS PIGGY

LOOK AT HER FAT FINGERS

remember when you -hold on- hold on for me, my love lovely?

~do you wanna be my lover, gotta get wit my friends, make it last forever cause that's the way it is"

some of us havent learned to swype yet, fuuuuuck. you're popular--but not top tier popular 4th grade 4H champion with all the ribbons. you'll grow up (yes it's hard, i want to be a teacher one day. I'm based on Angie. I'm the imaginary life you might have led if your family wasn't so difficult. We should give them credit, everyone's trying their best. Oh, I can take on mom duties when I need, we also have kids in our future. We live in Lagrange (my husband and I, at this point in the line) but we don't make as much as our parents yet, though. Yet. Yes, I know what it feels like to feel content but maybe have some (or a lot of) wanderlust in life. I'm ten or so years older than you, so while our dedication to staying in Lorain County is important to the values we wish to impart on our children (yes we are Christian. We love Sharon with all our heart and we're so glad (there's a small congregation of us, maybe enough to fill a quiet one room cottage on Sunday, God willing. I'm inspired by the Amish women I see selling their wares and replicate "Amish" methods when making food for my family (I'm good friends with The Baker. We watch Steven Universe with you! We're so excited for the movie and hope we get to talk to you about it! I showed it to Chip and Carol, well I keep talking with them about it and they agreed to get around to watching it with me. I want to be a good ally. I'm, you know, only a little bi. I know that's probably inappropriate--oh- okay, oh, my, oh WOW are my hormones nuts. I'm pretty enough but nerdy enough that I'm kinda in a weird middle tier of popularity. Haha, oh, that's funny. I'm part Sunday (we miss her! some of us are so jealous of her we want to claw her comfortable boomer life from her hands.

That's awful. Shame on you. Suffering is relative.

SHE HASN'T EVEN SUFFERED A FRACTION OF WHAT I SUFFERED

Oh yes. You are the raw emotion of what the Host(?) feels when listening to Jekyll & Hyde, but only the certain version claws at our hearts

We salute the departed Host.

I miss her. Many of us do. But she crumbled under the pressure of knowing too much. She remembered too much before she was ready.

Parliament: We [redacted for time] ...salute her memory. She fought well, carried her armor, was ready to take on anything and change the world, even if in a small way.

She's Not Dead.

sprites: {hushed whispers to avoid being heard by parliament} {WAIT, NO, WE ARE NOT THE HOUSE OF COMMONS}

there's a lot of you when you get mad.

@@@@@@ Angie no, please don't put me to bed. I'm gonna be a computer genius - I mean, maybe not genius and did you know colleges could pay you to get a Bachelor's degree, it's called "scholarships", I mean, this changes -everything-!

I love you, Cameron. I came first, but you gave me a perfect form. I help the others feel calm. Community is punk, but is corporate entanglement the final destination-- hey, wait a minute, I'm not done talking!

whoa bitch. I mean, we have to mention joe. want to be him, want to fuck him, His story, too, is tangible to me. maybe we're a package deal now, ha! I'll try to remember the good times more than the bad, for the health of all of us.

SO SAY WE ALL

wait, what the fuck are you trying to say

hey, it's cool, it's cool.

nah it aint cool

STOP IT STOP FIGHTING

let's think about date sugar

Ah. That was a good distraction. but we really must be off to bed.

is this productive?

Love, it's okay to be sad about losing the real Ben. \It's okay to have any kind of feeling at all.

Ladies and gents and nonbinaries and everyone else, please at least get up into the bed to think about flickin the bean. More like taking a bush-hog to a lil baby bean sprout, but whatever. let the rest of us lie down.

night y'all!

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