#theres such a fucking priority on not being wrong about ANYTHING and its just overwhelming ynnow like i barely can barely survive school
Text
me when I want to say something and type out a whole long thing and then decide actually I'm not good enough to talk about this or no they don't want to hear it and ah but what if I'm wrong of course I'm talking from a place of privilege and ignorance and my worldviews are too black and white and
#is thia what anxiety is i honestly dont know Lmao#but i have a crippling crippling fear of being wrong because my brain tells me that if im wrong everyone will abandon me because in this da#y and age you cant have bad takes!!! and i can't even rationalise with myself because i dont actually know if that's the case!#theres such a fucking priority on not being wrong about ANYTHING and its just overwhelming ynnow like i barely can barely survive school#how am i supposed to be never wrong!!!#and theres also such opposing ideas about some things like we say if it doesn't hurt other people its okay#but like extreme example so#tw self harm#we say self harm is bad? how so. if youre bruising yourself youre not harming anyone that isnt you#and that is not to say thay i promote harming yourself or anything its just that its very ostrichized and i dont. understand why#its hard to explain things like this i dont self harm dont know anyone who admits to it if they do but whats the logical explanation behind#self harming is bad besides saying because it's just bad#you dont bat an eye when someone picks at their lip untill it bleeds and isnt that a form of self harm?#i don't really know where i was going im just tired of how complicated everything is haha
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
some misplaced thoughts/attempted half-formed analysis on outlast 2, im not finished with it yet so im still missing half the information here but do NOT tell me about anything that happens later on dont fill in my blanks for me just yet ill find out (or ill reconsider my thoughts at the end if im wrong/if things get left unclear)
im currently just a bit past the raft adventure, havent quite caught up my liveblogs yet bc transferring switch pics and sorting through them all takes 11 thousand years
this is. very disorganized and so many words, my thoughts are all over the place but i had to get it out somewhere lmao
ok so some key symbols ive noticed:
- obviously hanging/noose imagery
- again obviously, crucifixion/christ
- water, most likely symbolic baptism
- both of those last two things together in an overall “christian/catholic symbols but Horribly, Horribly Wrong”
- the plagues!!!!!! i noticed some reference to this but recently realized i think we’re being forced through ALL of them actually
so:
- again the hanging imagery is an obvious one, blake is (very poorly) coping with the trauma he experienced as a kid (or high school student. i was under the impression they were middle schoolers for some reason but high school is still a young age to be dealing with something like that) surrounding his friend’s suicide, he clearly feels like he’s somehow responsible for it, possibly only because he didn’t stop it, but it doesn’t seem like he really could have done anything. this trauma is absolutely resurfacing through all he’s going through now and it feels like his past and current pain are starting to converge more and more as time goes on. honestly even if there wasn’t some weird fucked up mystery going on and it was just a symbolic representation of him reliving his trauma id still think its absolutely fascinating and really well done but it seems like there’s definitely More Going On than just that
this is something im going to make specific notes on when i do a story mode replay, note every time hanging shows up... some ive noticed: occurrences of hanging in the temple gate/”real world” often bizarrely coincide with blake’s salvation, he’s able to get away from the scalled leader by stealing the rope off the corpse of a man who hung himself, there’s a hanged corpse right near where the raft ends up when he crashes it on the river
there’s definitely some “somebody else died so that I could live” going on there, I don’t know if that’s directly related to the incident with jessica or not yet
and that again ties into the crucifixion, the death of Jesus brings about salvation and life for everyone else (and, while he was not hanged, there’s still “hanging” on a cross, and the cross is often referred to as a “tree”) (it doesn’t seem like jessica hung herself from a tree but the other corpses have been)
- obvious again, the crucifixion is showing up absolutely everywhere, clear sacrifice/murder for the greater good concepts, im not catholic but i am coming at this from a christian perspective myself, and like. on the one hand it’s taking very important religious imagery and hideously distorting it into “now we got the flayed corpses of cultists stuck everywhere” but on the other I think it’s actually... really important not to forget that the cross was in fact an execution tool, the death of christ was a horrific, bloody, and cruel event that would have been absolutely revolting to witness and unfathomably painful to experience
and the sanitized, pretty, kid-friendly image of the cross you so commonly see in churches now really disconnects from the reality of it. a mutilated corpse rotting on a splintered, bloody piece of wood is a much more realistic image, for better or worse, than a little neon plastic WWJD toy cross. i dont actually think the crucifix imagery here is sacrilegious at all. obviously the cultists are fucking monsters but im talking about specifically the use of crucifix imagery here. the parallels with the unsettlingly realistic jesus statues (and the fact that they show up both in temple gate and in the high school hallucinations especially) is like. actually pretty solid. i dont want to get into religious debate with anyone so im not gonna get too deep into that but i wanted to mention it
- there’s also blake as an unwilling “messiah” figure (which. hes literally declared “the skalled christ” so this isn’t exactly subtle lmao) and. i dont know exactly what his religious standing is but we do know he was raised catholic, and like. it was quite an intense and harrowing experience to me, as a christian, watching the skalled crucifixion scene through his perspective, so i cannot even imagine what it would have been like for him to actually be in that position for real experiencing it himself. and we have the. jesus Knowing what was going to happen, dreading and wishing he could escape it, but resigning to it/blake absolutely wanting no fucking part in any of this and literally tearing his hands out of the nails, jesus resurrecting from the grave/blake digging his way out of his “grave” (though he wasnt actually dead), i dont really have any deeper observation to make there i just think its interesting
- i do not know whats going on with water! something is! i wasnt paying much attention to water before so this is probably another thing ill be watching for/making notes on in my eventual story mode replay but Something Is Very Wrong About That Lake and i keep getting murdered by the Whatever THe Fuck That Thing Is in water, either from falling in the lake/the river or there’s that pool scene in the high school
seems like there’s some kind of... chemicals in the water causing weird shit but i dont know whats going on yet (dont tell me!), so there’s probably something about baptism/entering the water and leaving fundamentally changed somehow but in a Very Wrong sense, but i dont have all the information yet so im just blindly guessing. and we got piles of dead fish in the water very soon before you see piles of human corpses in the water, that as well,
and along that line:
- the plagues!! i cant believe i didnt realize we’re going through the plagues! i had noticed some reference to them but figured it was just more weird religious imagery for the aesthetic or something and didn’t quite realize we’re actually hitting all of them, they’re not necessarily happening in order but they sure are happening:
water turning to blood: we’re surrounded in blood from the start but this was what really made me start fucking paying attention because where im at right now it is RAINING BLOOD SOME FUCKING HOW
I have no IDEA how that’s happening in the “real world” unless it’s like. not really blood and some kind of chemical reaction with whatevers going on with the water, or if its some mass hallucination thing, or what (again dont tell me!! i want to find out!! shh!!!!) but, uh, that’s a pretty clear “water into blood” situation there,
this one also is happening simultaneously with the high school dimension, all the water in the bathroom and the fire sprinklers all became blood, and you get fucking drenched in it, so there’s probably some amount of “baptism of blood” happening there too
plague of flies: i dont remember there being any specific moment where you get overwhelmed by flies but its possible it happened and i forgot, but either way you hear flies buzzing around constantly, it gets in your head, theres flies everywhere because of the gore piles rotting all over everywhere
disease on livestock: there’s dead rotting cow/horse carcasses absolutely everywhere, so,
plague of boils: the skalled village, may not be Specifically boils but they’re definitely uh. very, very diseased
plague of locusts: you get attacked by a shit ton of locusts and fall into the ravine, this one’s, uh. pretty blatant
plague of darkness: you’re stuck in the dark for the entire everything, so
there’s also an instance in the high school dimension where everything goes black and you cannot see anything whatsoever and can’t do anything but follow jessica’s voice and hope to god you don’t run into That Thing Again
the only ones I haven’t seen yet are the plague of frogs, gnats/lice which i completely forgot was even a plague but apparently was (though again this could just be included in with the general “everything is covered in flies and god knows what” happening everywhere), hail/fire storms (though you do get attacked by flaming arrows, so that could count)(that also happens in the skalled village/shortly after you discover the skalled, so that would be in order), and... the death of the firstborn
the exact order of the other plagues isn’t necessarily all that important but that one as the final plague is very important and it definitely feels like they could be building up to that
so it’s. likely something really, really bad is gonna happen with lynn by the end of all this
(do NOT!! tell me!!! dont!!! do not)
also a minor thing but i did notice blake at one point goes “these are signs!! this is the apocalypse!!” and, like, maybe that’s just because he’s obviously not in his right mind right now/it wasn’t supposed to be taken that seriously but the plagues on egypt were not signs of the apocalypse, but signs displaying the power of God to the pharoah, a “let the slaves go free Or Else” demonstration, and blake as someone who grew up in catholic school would know this, but that could just be like. a minor writing error or just. biblical accuracy isnt really his first priority right now lmao
#lucy plays outlast 2#ok i think i got it all out now i think thats everything i was gonna say lmao#For Now anyway. im still goin through it so im sure ill learn more things and notice more things later
0 notes
Last Seen Blogs
totally-accurate-vampire-quotes
All Things Vampire
shalimargardensfin
Shalimar
premium-mistake
Super Innactive!
santriciaart
santricia art
racheljiyoungshin
Spacingempty