On February 19, 1987 The Fly debuted in Barcelona, Spain.

Titles Being Removed from Disney+ and Hulu

Deadline has listed what will be removed from Hulu and Disney+. As of Friday May 26th these will no longer be available:

(in alphabetical order)

A Spark Story [Disney+]

Be Our Chef [Disney+]

Best in Dough [Hulu]

Best in Snow [Hulu]

Big Shot [Disney+]

Black Beauty [Disney+]

Cheaper by the Dozen remake [Disney+]

Clouds [Disney+]

Diary of a Future President [Disney+]

Disney Fairy Tale Weddings [Disney+]

Dollface [Hulu]

Earth to Ned [Disney+]

Encore! [Disney+]

Everything’s Trash [Hulu]

Foodtastic [Disney+]

Howard [Disney+]

It’s a Dog’s Life with Bill Farmer [Disney+]

Just Beyond [Disney+]

Little Demon [FX/Hulu]

Love in the Time of Corona [Hulu]

Maggie [Hulu]

Magic Camp [Disney+]

Marvel’s MPower [Disney+]

Marvel’s Project Hero [Disney]

Marvel’s Voices Rising: The Music of Wakanda Forever [Disney+]

Pistol [FX/Hulu]

Rosaline [Disney+]

Stargirl [Disney+]

Stuntman [Disney+]

The Hot Zone [Nat Geo/Hulu]

The Making Of Willow [Disney+]

The Mighty Ducks: Game Changers [Disney+]

The Mysterious Benedict Society [Disney+]

The One and Only Ivan [Disney+]

The Premise [Hulu]

The Quest [Hulu]

The World According to Jeff Goldblum [Disney+]

Timmy Failure [Disney+]

Turner & Hooch [Disney+]

Weird but True! [Disney+]

Willow [Disney+]

Wolfgang [Disney+]

Y: The Last Man [FX/Hulu]

So Weird and DCOMs are safe for now. The list is primarily focused on short-lived series, specials, and movies that went direct to streaming.

According to John Bickerstaff, whose production of Willow is on the list, this is Disney’s way to get out of paying residuals in the middle of the WGA Strike that began May 2, 2023 and is still ongoing.

Trick or trivia

Happy Halloween! I do enjoy trivia of many types, but one of my favorite genres is what I call the Berenstein Timeline: unmade shows and movies, versions of classic movies where studios and producers made different decisions, some better, some much worse. All of these are real projects that were, on some level, considered (there are some recurring names)

"Heat Vision & Jack", a 90s pastiche of 70s-80s action shows starring Jack Black as an astronaut on the run from the law and Owen Wilson as his talking motorcycle

"Jurassic Park" directed by Tim Burton with Johnny Depp as Alan Grant, Jim Carrey as Ian Malcolm, and Vincent Price as John Hammond

the 90s "Batman" directed by Ivan Reitman; Bill Murray and Eddie Murphy were going to star but couldn't decide which of them would be Batman and which would be Robin

Back in the 1970s the American network was getting good numbers showing heavily-edited reruns of "Monty Python's Flying Circus", so they tried to sell the Pythons on the next logical step: an animated Saturday morning cartoon

"Edward Scissorhands" still directed by Burton but starring Tom Cruise or maybe Michael Jackson

"Return of the Jedi" directed by David Lynch; Harrison Ford was considering not coming back for the third movie and so when he came out of the carbonite there was a chance he would have been Christopher Walken

Guillermo del Toro's "At the Mountains of Madness". Also "the Hobbit" and lots of other things, he seems to have a lot of unmade projects

the 2010s "Star Trek" movie directed by Quentin Tarantino, where the edgy reboot crew visits the Gangster Planet from that one stupid episode of the original series

Everybody knows about the unmade "Superman Lives" starring Nicolas Cage in the title role, but did you know it was going to be directed by Tim Burton and include Christopher Walken as Brainiac, who would have been a green head on spider legs

Harold Ramis didn't particularly want to act on camera, so when they were casting "Ghostbusters" Egon could have been Christopher Walken, Christopher Lloyd, Jeff Goldblum, or John Lithgow. Supposedly the movie was originally intended to be a relatively serious exploration of Dan Akroyd's very real interest in paranormal investigation, although this clashes a bit with the fact that Peter Venkman was originally going to be played by John Belushi and Winston Zeddmore was written for Eddie Murphy who backed out when the character's backstory and most of his lines were cut

John Waters' animated series "Uncle John" on 90s MTV

the original version of "Bill & Ted's Time Van" starring Pauly Shore and Sean Penn

"Red Dragon" (the original Hannibal Lecter novel) directed by David Lynch starring John Lithgow as Hannibal Lecter and Mel Gibson as Will Graham

the 1970s "Dr. Strange" TV series

the 1990s Disney animated "John Carter of Mars"

the 1990s Warner Bros animated "King Tut" musical with songs by Prince

the serious horror version of "Beetlejuice"

Drew Barrymore's 2000s remake of "Barbarella"

the Dungeons & Dragons movie James Cameron was going to make until TSR left the table over merchandising disputes, forcing Cameron to go work on some dumb movie about the Titanic

American "Doctor Who" movie starring Michael Jackson

Canadian "Doctor Who" cartoon by Nelvana starring a Doctor based intensely off of either Jeff Goldblum or Christopher Lloyd

"Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone" directed by Terry Gilliam

"Good Omens" directed by Terry Gilliam and starring Johnny Depp and Robin Williams

"The Black Cauldron" using character and background designs by Nightmare-era Tim Burton

A couple months ago I had a vivid hallucination urging me to watch Cronenberg's The Fly, and so I had to watch it.

One thing Cronenberg knows how to do is direct a very tight script. This movie does not waste time. The first scene tells you all you need to know about the characters even while setting them up as nuanced multifaceted individuals, setting us up for for thematic character evolution that really elevated this from just goopy horror.

Boy is it goopy. My hallucination was NOT wrong. The typical Cronenberg body horror was strong in The Fly, manifesting in goop, monstrous transformations, goopy prosthetics, gender commentary, maggot babies, and more goop. It's a goopy film.

There are lots of goopy films out there. Some of them even end up being good, though few of them achieve the goopieness of The Fly. Yet The Fly manages to fire on all cylinders, never letting a scene stay lazy, never letting the plot stray from its tight pacing. For all the goop its still efficient, and is up there with Carpenter's The Thing as one of the best 50s horror remakes on the record.

Let me be your hallucination as I tell you to go watch it. A very goopy Jeff Goldblum is worth it.

hiiiiiii!! i don't have the brain to do or watch anything atm but i would LOVE some movie recs please 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

YAY ok assuming this is coming from the 80s movie post so. here r some of my favorite 80s movies:

ridiculous campy fun:

earth girls are easy (1988) - fucking LOVE this movie!!! such a fun time. horny aliens crash their spaceship on earth + get taken in by a human woman. also it's a musical comedy + the aliens are played by jeff goldblum jim carrey and damon wayans

hell comes to frogtown (1988) - also. obsessed w this one. post-apocalyptic world where society is a matriarchy + humans need 2 repopulate. protagonist is a Manly Man who has been discovered to have a Mega-High Sperm Count, making him a government asset so a sexy military doctor locks him up in a chastity cage 2 conserve his precious sperm. also there are mutated frog people + they kidnapped a bunch of ~fertile~ human women to keep as sex slaves so Manly Man needs 2 accompany sexy military doctor + sexy soldier to go rescue the ladies from Frogtown so he can fuck them <3 also his name is Sam Hell. hence. 'hell comes to frogtown'

clue (1985) - based on the board game!! murder mystery comedy w wacky characters + an ending that is oh-so-fun

weird dark fantasy:

the company of wolves (1984) - the movie that inspired my 80s movie post 2nite <3 creepy fairytale retelling of red riding hood w a bunch of stories-within-a-story so that it ends up feeling like some sort of fever dream matryoshka doll

labyrinth (1986) - one of my FAVORITE movies of all time!!!!! david bowie is a goblin king who kidnaps the protagonist's baby brother as a favor 2 her + then when she's like actually i want him back he's like ok solve my maze then <3

return to oz (1985) - sequel to 'the wizard of oz' that is like. 10 times darker + weirder + creepier + definitely scarred me + my twin when we watched it as children lol. dorothy won't stop talking abt oz so she's taken 2 a mental institution for electroshock therapy. queue dramatic storm + sudden return to oz except the city is in ruins + dorothy needs 2 save the day

horror:

aliens (1986) - sequel to alien (1979) which just missed the cutoff for making this list + i also recommend--but u don't NEED 2 watch it 2 watch this movie. outer space creature feature meets slasher survival horror. xenomorph i love u <3

the thing (1982) - another sci-fi alien horror but this time it follows a group of researchers in the arctic who encounter an alien that can change shape 2 look like any of them. queue paranoia. there's also a more modern remake of this movie if i'm not mistaken

day of the dead (1985) - probably romero's least well-known zombie movie lol but a fun one nonetheless! good if u like 80s movies + zombie movies which. i do <3

the shining (1980) - oooh artsy spooky hotel horror.....a classic to be honest....

animated:

the last unicorn (1982) - ANOTHER favorite movie of all time for me!!!! unicorn who lives in isolation in a forest overhears two humans talking about how there are no more unicorns in the world + is like what i can't be the only one left...so she sets out on an adventure 2 try and find out what happened 2 all the unicorns <3 another movie that scarred me as a child bc of how creepy + dark it was

nausicaa of the valley of the wind (1984) - studio ghibli <3 this is one of my fave ghibli films. post-apocalyptic wasteland where giant bugs roam the earth....amazing

castle in the sky (1986) - more ghibli! girl w mysterious magic necklace meets boy who is searching for castle in the sky. also they are being chased by pirates + creepy government agents. FUN

kiki's delivery service (1989) - aaaaand more ghibli. teenage witch sets out 2 make her way in the world + encounters existential dread <3

classics:

heathers (1988) - veronica decides that she's sick of her mean-girl popular friendgroup + at the same time meets Mysterious New Boy. when she complains 2 him abt her friends he starts killing them <3

the princess bride (1987) - based on the book (which i also recommend!!); i feel like everyone knows this movie but. basically fairytale-esque romance abt a girl named buttercup who falls in love w a farmboy named wesley but then wesley gets murdered by pirates...or so it seems....

ferris bueller's day off (1986) - teenagers decide 2 skip school + run amok in chicago. wahoo!!

The funniest movie that will never be made.

From me and my brothers fevered imaginations to your screen allow me to introduce to you the funniest movie that will never be made.

A word for word, shot for shot remake of the Princess Bride with the following cast.

Christopher Walkin as Westley

Judy Dench as Buttercup

Jeff Goldblum as Vizzini

Peter Dinklage as Fezzik

Arnold Schwarzenegger as Inigo Montoya

Nicholas Cage as Prince Humperdinck

John Malkovich as Count Rugen

William Shatner as the King

Rowan Atkinson as the Albino

John Cleese as the Priest

Alexander Skarsgård and Kate Winslet as Miracle Max and his wife Valerie.

with

Fred savage as the grandpa and Finn Wolfhard as the grandson .

Is this a good remake? ABSOLUTELY NOT!

But is it the funniest possible combination of actors me and my brother could conceive of?

YES!

31 Days of Horror

Day 5 - Favorite Horror Remake

The Fly - 1986

Let me tell you something about remakes. I don’t like them. They sometimes try too hard or don’t even try at all. With the exception of a few because I’ve seen the originals and then the remakes and I was satisfied with them. Other remakes just copy off of the original scene by scene (Psycho). So with that in mind, lets take a gander of one of my favorite remakes and its from the 80’s.

Starring two young actors by the name of Jeff Goldblum and Geena Davis. This one or the original need to be on your watch list. Turns out the movie where I fell in love with Jeff Goldblum happens to be the most disgusting one but its awesome!

Goldblum is a geek certified scientist who meets up with this lovely journalist, Davis, who takes her to his science lab so he can see his pods. The best pick-up line ever! But for real, they’re teleportation pods. He gets in one pod, he does some kind switch thingy on his machine, and he teleports to the other pod… which is in the same room. But he’s trying to convince this girl if people have these pods from one house to another, or building to another, nobody has to worry about being late for somewhere.

The magic comes in when he teleports himself without an adult present and without the knowledge that a housefly has breached the pod. They teleport together to the other pod and nothing is at what it seems anymore. Soon, Goldblum discovers he has developed some kind of super power… he can hear things, smell better, jump higher, and even have more sex with Geena Davis. oi, the consequence for that. lol.

After realizing what happened, Goldblum discovers that he is now an insect and some of the scenes where he’s now a fly are pretty gruesome to 80’s gore standards.

Favorite Gore Disgusting Scene: The arm wrestling match between a bar patron and Goldblum which Goldblum ends up cheating by vomiting some type of acid (behind the scenes its made from honey, eggs, and milk) on to the man's arm forcing him to lose.

What was your favorite horror remake?

Thirty One Days of Horror Movies! Day Nine :D

The Fly

Let’s enoy some good old fashioned BODY HORROR

The story tells the tale of a scientist working on developing a working teleporter and specifically with what happens when he learns of the terrible side effects when two seperate species go through the teleporter at the same time....

From David Cronenberg, the master of eighties horror movies about weird and horrifying things happening to peoples bodies, this is a remake of an earlier film that ramps up the body horror, gore and general nightmarish energy that comes from slowing a human slowly transforming into an insectoid monster 

Starring none other than the amazing Jeff Goldblum, actor, Grand Master of Sakkar and the Most Power Card in All of Duel Monsters, the movie has an entertainingly gross, horrifying and at times even emotional plot that manages to make you feel real emotion despite the extremely bizarre and unreal nature of what’s happening

But the true star of the show here is the effects, which are still absolutely horrifying and stomach churning all these years later

So if you’re ready to believe a man can Fly, check out this wonderfully terrifying body horror classic from the eighties.

Just...maybe not right after you’ve just eaten >.>

Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)

So much of what makes 1956’s Invasion of the Body Snatchers good is the time and place that spawned it. Whether intentional or not, you can’t unsee its themes of McCarthyism & paranoia and the ending is very much a product of the 50’s. The 1978 keeps the plot the same but what everything means changes. This"Invasion of the Body Snatchers is much more explicit in its scares and in other ways improves on what we saw earlier. It isn’t “the same” because you don’t have the underlying Red Scare represented in the invasion but it is a better movie.

Elizabeth Driscoll (Brooke Adams) approaches her friend Matthew (Donald Sutherland) with a concern about her boyfriend, Geoffrey (Art Hindle). He looks the same but there’s something off about him. As they approach their friends Jack (Jeff Goldblum), Nancy (Veronica Cartwright) and David (Leonard Nimoy) about his unusual behaviour, they suspect the change within Geoffrey is part of a larger phenomenon.

The movie tells you immediately that what’s happening is otherworldly, which is a good move. Invasion of the Body Snatchers was always a bad title because it gives too much away. If people know what’s happening - perhaps because they’ve seen the classic film - it’s better to embrace this fact than to hide it. Even when you know, the slow drip of information brings you chills. The foreground plot of Elizabeth and Matthew - whom you can tell have an unspoken love for each other - slowly, but steadily gets taken over by the body snatchers plot. Astute viewers will notice small details in the behaviour of the extras in the background, in the actions of Geoffrey that reveal just how dire the situation is. Even with this knowledge, a key reveal drops a bomb on the audience. It had me floored.

Particularly strong is the use of music and foley. Sometimes it’s just damn weird but it certainly is effective. The props and special effects also deserve attention. The animatronics and other bits of technical wizardry hold up remarkably well; some I have absolutely no idea how they did it.

Science fiction fans may already know what elements this film brings to the legacy of Body Snatchers - I’m talking about “the scream”. In context, it unsettles and disturbs. It’s a genius addition that is so good, you know every subsequent director had to keep it. You might be able to find something creepier… but the simplicity of that scream is just too good to pass up.

The film's paranoid atmosphere is stifling. By the time we’re at the last act, you’re as panicked as the characters. You just desperately want what's happening it to end. It doesn’t matter if it’s a happy ending, or not; just end so we can escape and return to our world! This may be why the film can feel a little long at times but wow does its conclusion hit the mark. It’s the absolute perfect note; the only way this movie could’ve ended.

1978’s Invasion of the Body Snatchers is a must-see sci-fi horror. In fact, if you have to choose between this version and the original (which would be unfair), I’d say go with this one. It’s a prime example of a remake that’s even better than the work that inspired it. (On Blu-ray, September 13, 2019)

Reflections and Meditations on David Cronenberg and the Importance of Keeping My Room Clean and Organized.

I’m mostly just posting this because like, something I personally struggle with is keeping my room clean, ESPECIALLY when I’m feeling like shit and I want to talk about it. There’s also spoilers for two of Cronenberg’s films, “The Fly” and “Dead Ringers” underneath the cut.

I’m currently cleaning my room and reflecting on the horror of David Cronenberg while I do it. I’m not afraid of Cronenberg’s body horror. It’s gross, but not scary. No, the things that actually scare me about Cronenberg’s work is how he carefully uses the cleanliness of his characters’ living spaces to define just when they’ve gone off the deep end. This is most apparent in both his remake of “The Fly” starring Jeff Goldblum, where it makes sort of sense because Brundlefly is, well part fly. But also, in his original movie “Dead Ringers”, about twin OB/GYN doctors who frequently impersonate each other to compensate for their weaknesses in one part of life. The final scene of that film is like, Jeremy Irons clinging to himself (he plays both twins) as he wakes up and realizes he has literally killed his own brother while they were both high as fuck. And the apartment they live in is just, like. Absolutely trashed. Food wraps and soda cans everywhere. And most memorably, a piece of a half eaten cake on the shelf. My room in some of my worst, most apathetic about my own life moments, has resembled the beginning of this kind of mess. Pyramids of Dr. Pepper cans littered my room in California when I just graduated high school because I was listless and unknowingly suffering from body dysphoria. As an adult I am generally speaking a bit better about managing this part of my life, but I am not exactly the best at it. As evidenced by today’s cleaning, it’s very easy for me to fall back into being apathetic about my living space. This is especially true when I am just. Exhausted and dead tired all the time. My previous job wasn’t great. It was harmful to my mental health, and reflecting back on it, I can very clearly see just how true this is in the state of my bedroom. But, I know that unlike a Cronenberg character, I am not doomed by the narrative to fall into an inescapable spiral. I can, and will get out of this. I’m working on it right now, in fact. I’m not looking forward to tackling the closet, but that’s mostly because my closet is full of boxes that do not have a better place to go. But I’ll figure it out. 

round up // JUNE 22

Big action! Twisty plots! They can only mean one thing: summer. Big blockbusters are back in theaters, and so am I! This month’s list of recommendations is on the short side, but there are still top 10 picks, including three movies fresh to the big screen or streaming.

June Crowd-Pleasers

1. Top Gun: Maverick (2022)

The kind of blockbuster that is making people who aren’t passionate about movies to become passionate about this movie. I’ve talked with many in the last few weeks who have said they haven’t seen or don’t like the 1986 Top Gun or action movies in general, but they all left in love with this sequel. As one who is passionate about movies and loves Top Gun, I also gotta say it took my breath away. Be sure to see it on the big screen for the ultimate thrill ride. Crowd: 10/10 // Critic: 8/10

2. Chip ’n Dale: Rescue Rangers (2022)

Apparently Rescue Rangers was a TV show starring Chip and Dale in the late ‘80s and early ‘90s—that means nothing to me. What does mean something to me: John Mulaney and Andy Samberg teaming up to voice animated chipmunks and inviting their pals (like Will Arnett, Keegan Michael-Key, Chris Parnell, Seth Rogen, Paul Rudd, J.K. Simmons, and—wait, Steve Curtis Chapman?) to join this hilarious Who Framed Roger Rabbit?-style adventure. Now make Aunt-Man, you cowards! Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/10

3. Double Feature—Police Action Thrillers: Chaos (2005) + Copshop (2021)

Fun fact about me: I’ll watch Jason Statham in pretty much anything, and…I’m pretty much on my way to doing that. Chaos (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 6/10) is one of the most watchable action B-movies he’s been in (and believe me, “watchable” is higher praise for his canon than you’d think—you can only remake The Italian Job so many times). Statham, Ryan Phillippe, and Wesley Snipes lead a twisty bank robbery plot that may surprise you even with its hackneyed setup. That’s also true for Copshop (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6.5/10), which is a twisty prison break plot Gerard Butler, Frank Grillo, and Alexis Louder turn into something fun. Pair these movies together for an afternoon of action comfort food.

4. Jurassic World Dominion (2022)

Look, we can sit around and pick at its flaws, but that is not this review. Here are three things I loved about this movie (which is part of a franchise you know I love):

Dominion is by far the most intellectually curious of the World movies, asking big questions about ethics in science, how we cope with impending disaster, and our responsibility to each other. These are all-time questions but feel especially relevant to our time in how they're presented, and I don’t think any Jurassic movie has been this curious since ’93.

It reunited my Avengers (Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, and Sam Neill) and gave them appropriate and consistent arcs for each of them, not just cameos! Even better, it let Goldblum be Goldblum, which was my biggest wish for this movie.

It featured some of the most fun set pieces of the World series: That chase in Malta! A triple giant dino fight! Scary locust! Even better, homages to the past and the fresh-to-the-franchise ideas were in balance.

Maybe another day I will write about the things that did not work, but I'm still reveling in the Dern and dinos at the moment. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10

5. Runaway Jury (2003)

2003: My dad dragged me to see this in theaters though I insisted I wasn't interested. To this day it is still only one of two movies I've ever fallen asleep during at the cinema. (The other was Master and Commander, which I did want to see. Apparently 2003 was a bad year for holding my attention.)

Father's Day 2022: Finally finished it with Dad! Though I’m feeling validated this movie was not for a pre-teen me, it’s quite fun for adults who understand of how juries work. Gene Hackman and Dustin Hoffman are competing to chew the most scenery, and John Cusack and Rachel Weisz may or may not be your classic John Grisham heroes to root for in this twisty conspiracy plot. PSA: I am ready for John Cusack to make a comeback at anytime. If you have any influence in the matter, I appreciate you using it to make whatever we're watching better. All team-ups with Joan welcome. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 8/10

June Critic Picks

1. It’s Always Fair Weather (1953)

I don’t care what you say—Gene Kelly’s tap dance in roller skates here confirms my love for the terrible-yet-delightful Xanadu. The Turner Classic Movies intro informed me this was pitched as a sequel to On the Town but was reworked when Frank Sinatra and Jules Munshin were unavailable. Knowing this does make me wish the OG team could’ve reunited for that vision—the other two guys felt like filler, not like a part of a true ensemble—but I’m such a sucker for Kelly and Cyd Charisse that their dancing and the fun premise covers those weaknesses. Crowd: 7/10 // Critic: 7.5/10

2. And the Oscar Goes to… Podcast

TCM host Jacqueline Stewart is putting together a podcast about pivotal Oscar ceremonies? You don’t have to tell me twice to subscribe. Listen for insight on how the Academy Awards overlap with politics, social change, the history of film in in 1940, 1957, 1973, 2002, and more.

3. Margin Call (2011)

I can’t pretend I understand all the economic, um, stuff in this inspired-by-the-2008-financial-collapse drama, but I do understand the power of a top-notch cast to create suspense even with a clueless audience. Paul Bettany, Jeremy Irons, Demi Moore, Zachary Quinto, Stanley Tucci, and more will get you invested even if you’re like me and have zero interest in Wall Street. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10 

4. Good Reads

A miscellaneous Round Up of links that appeared in my inbox and Twitter feed I’m happy to put in yours.

“The Jonas Brothers Are 'Better' Than They've Ever Been: 'We're Having the Time of Our Lives,’” People.com (2022) - I’ve never felt more seen than when People listed 100 reasons to love American and made the Jonas Brothers #1 

“The 25 Most Quintessential 1980s Soundtracks, From Top Gun and Footloose to Do the Right Thing and Repo Man,” Variety.com (2022) - Because no other decade has done soundtracks like the ‘80s 

“A New Golden Age Emerges for O.G. Film Stars,” HollywoodReporter.com (2022) - A follow-up of my recommendations of Top Gun: Maverick and Jurassic World Dominion 

“Labor Exploitation, Explained by Minions,” Vox.com (2022) - This is a little ridiculous—few things in life deserve to be analyzed less than the Minions—but it’s so well-written I couldn’t help but get a kick out of it 

“What Would You Like to Know?” Vulture.com (2022) - You know I wouldn’t scroll past a Joe Alwyn profile 

“I’m Not Afraid of Stephen King Books Because I Know Maine Isn’t Real,” McSweeneys.net (2022) 

“The Lord of the Rings Hobbit Stars Reunite for 'Smash It Out of the Park' Dinner,” EW.com (2022) - My heart!

5. Letter From an Unknown Woman (1948)

Joan Fontaine strikes again! Here she’s a lovesick groupie of a handsome pianist (Louis Jourdan) who basically wills a relationship with him into existence. It’s a tragic romance that will make you swoon over their affair and the gowns. Another entry on my Letterboxd list “’40s Gals Just Trying to Live Their Best Lives BUT SOCIETY.” Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10

Also this June…

My Best Picture Project continues slowly but surely with How Green Was My Valley, aka the film that beat Citizen Kane for Best Picture. If this kind of movie isn’t your cup of tea, this especially slow-paced drama won’t be for you. But if historical family dramas make you feel warm and cozy, it’s worth checking out. Read my Crowd and Critic reviews.

On SO IT’S A SHOW?, Kyla and I released a new episode the HBO sitcom(?) The Comeback. What real life lawsuit may have inspired a storyline on the show? Is it possible for a show to be cringier than the character of April Nardini on Gilmore Girls? (Spoiler alert: Yes.) And what on Earth is the “that” no one wants to see? Get the documentary crew ready to follow us on our journey!

And in ep. 123, Lorelai is comparing Rory’s new apartment to an Irish memoir and a ‘70s sitcom—you know, like you do all the time. How were we introduced to these references by two modern sitcoms? What do Harry Potter actors have to do with Angela’s Ashes? Can you still go to the Sanford and Son junkyard? And are Rory’s new digs with Paris really as bad as the homes Lorelai is referencing?

Top 10 horror remake movies

Some of the most popular horror remakes of all time include:

"The Thing" (1982) - Directed by John Carpenter, this remake of the 1951 film "The Thing from Another World" brought a new level of terror to the story of an alien creature that infiltrates an Antarctic research station.

"The Fly" (1986) - This remake of the 1958 film of the same name, directed by David Cronenberg, is a classic example of the body horror genre and features a standout performance from Jeff Goldblum.

"The Ring" (2002) - This American remake of the Japanese horror film "Ringu" brought the creepy story of a cursed videotape to a new audience and became a cultural phenomenon.

"Dawn of the Dead" (2004) - This remake of the 1978 film of the same name, directed by Zack Snyder, brought a fresh perspective to the zombie genre and featured a more action-oriented approach.

"Let Me In" (2010) - This American remake of the Swedish film "Let the Right One In" is a faithful adaptation that captures the eerie atmosphere and emotional depth of the original.

"Nosferatu the Vampyre" (1979) - This remake of the 1922 silent film "Nosferatu" is a stylish and atmospheric take on the classic vampire story, directed by Werner Herzog.

"The Evil Dead" (2013) - This remake of the 1981 cult classic directed by Fede Alvarez brings a new level of gore and intensity to the story of a group of friends who unleash a horde of demons.

"Cape Fear" (1991) - This remake of the 1962 film of the same name, directed by Martin Scorsese, is a tense and suspenseful thriller that features a chilling performance from Robert De Niro.

"Suspiria" (2018) - This remake of the 1977 Italian horror film of the same name, directed by Luca Guadagnino, is a visually stunning and emotionally complex take on the original.

"The Haunting" (1999) - This remake of the 1963 film "The Haunting" is a stylish and atmospheric take on the classic ghost story, directed by Jan de Bont.

These remakes have been praised for their ability to capture the essence of the original films while also bringing something new remakes of all time.

February 11, 2023. 👎 streaming on Netflix. I expected more from a movie that spanned four sequels and a remake starring Bruce Willis. The acting was quite poor. Every performance, except Vincent Gardenia, was subpar at best. There was quite a bit of filler scenes that did nothing to propel the plot or help us to understand the characters better. They were just there, filling time. There were some "bright" spots, moments where we caught a glimpse of known character actors that made me giggle. Like Jeff Goldblum's over the top Freak #1, and Paul Dooley as a patrolman, Helen Martin, Christopher Guest, and Al Lewis. The crime scene that becomes the catalyst for our protagonist's change from mild-mannered liberal to murderous vigilante is appropriately intense and visceral for a movie in 1974, (and it works here, it really does) but Bronson isn't a witness to this brutality, therefore his transformation feels... forced. The movie plods along after that volience for some time before Bronson starts dishing out his "justice", then after a couple of mundane shootings, it ends, rather anticlimacticly. I can only imagine what the other four movies must be like...

#HARPERSMOVIECOLLECTION

2023

RANDOM SEQUEL MARATHON

I re-watched The Fly 2 (1989)

An incredibly unnecessary sequel to a great horror film.

The son of Seth Brundle, the original fly, is kept in a facility before slowly changing and becoming an insect like monster.

The script here is from Mick Garris and Frank Darabont. Darabont is a great filmmaker and Garris makes pretty funny B-horror. The director here is Chris Walas, who I know next to nothing about.

The 1980's horror remake, 'The Fly", is one of Director David Cronenberg's best known films. It's a tragic story of science gone wrong, body horror, disease, and a man's loss of self. It's an excellent remake of a classic horror, up there with John Carpenter's "The Thing". It's also super gory and gross in a way that only Cronenberg can be.

This film, a direct sequel to Cronenberg's remake, isn't really about a man's loss of self, so much as it is about a dude becoming a fly monster.

The movie does try and shoot it's shot at making us feel the emotions of it's predecessor, by having our young protagonist bond with a dog for a second and then having to see that dog basically tortured. It leads to one heartbreaking moment that is completely unearned. So unearned and heartbreaking that I might actually hate this movie for putting me through it.

The best thing about this movie is definitely Eric Stoltz and Daphne Zuniga. They are two stars from the 1980's and 90's who are doing an admirable job selling the unearned moments.

The next best thing is that this movie eventually becomes a monster movie with an acid spitting fly creature and there's a few gross out moments along the way to get us there. Nothing great, but enough.

The Cronenberg fly, besides just being better in the gross out department, saw Jeff Goldblum go from a nice scientist into a monster and the villain of his own story. Here, the fly isn't really the bad guy. He's more like a super powered monstrosity that kills the evil bad guys who work for a corporation. It makes for much less drama, but for more henchman getting murdered.l scenes. It also means we don't get the poignant moments of our character sinking slowly into madness, moral corruption and evil, he just sort of has a moment of being a weird dick before becoming a fly monster.

Overall, I don't think I've ever watched a movie that feels more like a "Sequel" than this. It completely ignores the themes of the first film, has a less interesting creature and is nothing more than an excuse to spend the last 20 minutes being a monster movie, all for the sake of making money off the title. And, don't get me wrong, when a giant monster spits acid into a guy's face and that guy rips his face off and becomes a screaming skull, I'm all in for that. But, if you're gonna go that direction, don't make me cry about a mutated dog. That shit is manipulative.

Chris Pratt in Jurassic World (Colin Trevorrow, 2015)

Cast: Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard, Irrfan Khan, Vincent D’Onofrio, Ty Simpkins, Nick Robinson, Jake Johnson, Omar Sy, BD Wong, Judy Greer, Lauren Lapkus, Brian Tee, Katie McGrath. Screenplay: Rick Jaffa, Amanda Silver, Colin Trevorrow, Derek Connolly. Cinematography:  John Schwartzman. Production design: Ed Verreaux. Film editing: Kevin Stitt. Music: Michael Giacchino.

It doesn't take long for déjà vu (not to say ennui) to set in when you're watching Jurassic World. If the title alone doesn't incite it, the use of John Williams's theme for Jurassic Park (Steven Spielberg, 1993) certainly will. (The movie's main score is by Michael Giacchino.) So what are we dealing with here: a sequel, a reboot, or a remake? And does it really matter? There is a deep cynicism underlying this movie, made manifest even in the dialogue: Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard), the theme park's operations manager, says, "We've been pre-booking tickets for months. The park needs a new attraction every few years in order to reinvigorate the public's interest. Kind of like the space program. Corporate felt genetic modification would up the wow factor." Not once does Jurassic World question the plausibility of opening a new dinosaur theme park 20 years after the disasters depicted in the original film and its 1997 and 2001 sequels. (Although 32 years passed between the original and this sequel/reboot/remake, the new film seems to assume that the first one took place in 2003.) All that matters is the wow factor. The trouble is that the 1993 film has a bit more than just wow: It had genuine awe, not only at the film technology but also in the imaginative evocation of what it would really be like to encounter living dinosaurs. It had plausible characters, embodied by Sam Neill, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, and Richard Attenborough. In their place, Jurassic World has a hunky motorcycle-riding velociraptor-whisperer (Chris Pratt), a slightly ditzy spouter of corporate-speak in heels (Howard), and a hissable villain who wants to militarize genetically engineered saurians (Vincent D'Onofrio). Fortunately, all three actors are more than capable of making the most of their stock characters. And fortunately, everyone concerned with making the film knows how to hype up the action. Which is necessary, because whenever the film slows for something resembling rational thought or human behavior -- as when the two young brothers, Zach (Nick Robinson) and Gray (Ty Simpkins), are left alone to reflect on whether their parents are getting divorced -- the film stagnates. At those moments, we can only reflect on how much better the original film was at making you believe in its humans. Why, for example, does this one have two boys as its juvenile protagonists when the original had a boy and a girl? And why has Laura Dern's capable paleobotanist been replaced by Howard's MBA type? Not to mention that the women in the film, Claire and her assistant, Zara (Katie McGrath), who is entrusted with looking after the boys, and the boys' mother, Karen (Judy Greer), are depicted as women whose focus on their careers puts others in danger. There is fun to be had in the movie, but only if you're willing to overlook what its subtext tells us about how things changed, and not for the better, in 30 years.