#thank you for giving me an excuse to ramble babs❣️
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Tumblr is being dumb and not wanting to work with me today (and is also dumb for not letting me put in more than one video clip), but @babsvibes asked me what some of my favorite Bob's Burgers quotes are, so here is my response in its entirety (you better buckle up, because it's long):
Babs!! I appreciate you so much, thank you for giving me another ask❣️
You already know who most of these quotes will be from because you asked me 🤣 This ask is too good, I’m super excited to get into this.
Okay, I don’t have these in any particular order (this was originally meant to be a top five but got expanded to eight (plus a ton of honorable mentions) because there are just too many good quotes), but some of my absolute favorites are:
—(From the movie): “I know you’re droopy Bob right now, but you know who else is in there? Dreamy Bob. The guy who wanted to open a restaurant in the first place, slap his name on it, make cuckoo, crazy burgers with wild ingredients. A new one every day.” —Linda 🥹
Bonus: “You know what you gotta do to droopy Bob? You gotta hit him in the nuts, like this! >:D”--Linda, AKA the best wife in the world
This scene always has me extremely unwell. It’s like the writers took a look at me and my blog and were just like How can we activate Doodler’s emotional tears to the maximum degree? It honestly has everything I could’ve asked for. Linda being the best, most supportive wife in the universe? Yup. Bob being his usual sad, dramatic self? Yes.
A BOBLIN FLASHBACK WITH LINDA PREGNANT WITH TINA AND BOB LOOKING SO EXCITED AND PASSIONATE ABOUT THE RESTAURANT?? 🥺🥺🥺 Check.
—(Also from the movie): “Can I say, ‘Honey, No’!” —Gene
“No 🙄” —Louise
This line is hilarious and caught me so off-guard when I first heard it. It’s one of the best Gene lines, which is quite the feat given that he has so many good lines. I can’t believe some people can’t see his beautiful Genderfluidity after hearing this line and Eugene Mirman’s delivery. Genuinely, though, I absolutely love how comfortable Gene usually is when it comes to being himself. There are moments where his self-doubt and insecurity creep in, and I could make a whole post about that, but whenever he’s around his family, he’s usually so comfortable with saying what he wants.
—(I forgot which episode this was from and couldn't figure out which one it was, if someone can tell me, that would be much appreciated 😭): “Teddy, I know that’s your burger. Stop being weird and just eat the burger.” —Mr. Bob Burger himself
Bonus: “Is this what you want you sick bastard?????” —Teddy
This exchange is so freaking funny, such a classic. Bob and Teddy’s yelling matches never fail to make me burst out laughing. And just the fact that this all happened because Bob gets so upset when people eat other burgers and like them, so everyone has to pretend to not like other burgers?? Hilarious. He’s such a sensitive man, I love him so much.
—(From “The Runaway Club”): “I’m a little disappointed too. Before I saw it on you, I thought this bracelet was classy.” —Tina
Bonus: “Take. It. Off.” —Tammy
“I. Would. Rather. Die.” —Tina
“THEN YOU WILL DIE!!!!!!!!!” —Tammy
Tina’s line here is so good. I love how she can come up with really good one-liners to get back at Tammy when she wants to. And Tammy getting so jealous and angry?? Hilarious. And then Jocelyn panicking and pulling the fire alarm?? And then Jimmy Jr. being an absolute dumbass and just spraying a fire extinguisher everywhere? 11/10 scene.
Plus, you gotta love how protective Gene and Louise get over Tina here: “Get your hands off my sister 😡”
—(Deleted line from “Father of the Bob”): “He lets me eat as much Tylenol as I want! 😄”
Yes, I’m including a link to the animation I did for this scene yesterday, don’t judge me.
Anyway, this line is actual comedy gold. I can’t believe they cut it. Yes, they don’t want kids to be irresponsible with Tylenol. But it’s so funny!! Gene, sweetie, please don’t overdose on medicine.
It’s also really sweet how much the kids love their Pop Pop. It’s just really nice that they have a grandparent they love because Gloria and Al are the worst.
—(From “Tina-Ranasaurus Wrecks”): “TINA FOR THE LOVE OF GOD EITHER TURN AWAY OR STOP—THE BRAKES, TINA, YOU’RE ABOUT TO—HIT THE BRAKES” —Bob
Bonus: “God, you’re so honest. Who raised you?” —Bob
“I don’t know 😫” —Tina
This scene absolutely sends me Every. Single. Time. It’s so good. Just Tina’s constant groaning and Bob’s panic which only grows as they get closer to the only other car in the parking lot?? I can’t. His yelling at the end never fails to send me into a fit of laughter. There's just something about the way H. Jon Benjamin delivered it.
And the fact that the car Tina hit was Jimmy Pesto’s? That makes this scene even funnier.
—(From “Can’t Buy Me Math”): “Did someone order takeout or should I say take off?? 😏” —Bob
Bonus: “No one wants to see that! 😡” —Random patron at Jimmy Pesto’s
“Hey! I do! 🤬” —Linda
This is one of my all-time favorite Boblin moments, tied only with the flashback scene from the movie, and probably their moment in “Bob, Actually”.
Aside from how hilarious it is (I mean, “Takeout or should I say take off” lives rent-free in my head), it goes to show just how much these two love and adore each other. Bob was willing to be naked in full view of customers at Jimmy Pesto’s and he still did the strip tease because he loves Linda that much.
They definitely had a fun night together 😏
(From “The Plight Before Christmas”): “So jolly. I didn’t expect to feel this way. I was focusing on Santa, but the best presents are sitting here. And they aren’t even wrapped up.” —Louise 🥹
This scene makes me sob every single time. I think the part that gets me the most is the moment where Louise looks into the audience and sees Tina came to see her give the poem. Tina in this moment reminds me so much of my older sister it makes me way too emotional I might actually get sick. Without words, it showed their sisterly bond in such a beautiful way. And then Louise’s actual poem??????? I can’t handle it. The way she eloquently describes in poem form how much she cares about her family can’t be done justice in words.
God, I need a minute to recover from this.
And that’s my top eight! Here are some honorable mentions because there are just too many good quotes from this gem of a show:
—(From “The Gene Mile”): “WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO, CHANGE MY PHONE EVERY TEN YEARS??” —Teddy
“Y E S” —Bob
—(From “Dream a Little Bob of Bob”): “I DID IT. HELL YEAHHHHHHHH” —Tina
—(From “Boyz 4 Now”): “I’m no hero. I put my bra on one boob at a time, just like everyone else.” —Tina
—(From “Two For Tina”): “When you say no, it makes me want you more!!!!!! 😫” —Jimmy Jr.
—(From “Y Tu Ga-Ga Tambien”): “It’s not a good feeling when they say everyone, but they don’t mean you.” —Gene
—(From “Torpedo”): “But I call you dad! I think of it as Dad’s Burgers!” —Gene
—(From “Best Burger”) “Dad!! I’m sorry I screwed up today. I’m sorry I screw up all the time! 😣” —Gene
Bonus: “Gene, you might make mistakes from time to time, but I love you and I love who you are.” —Bob 🥺
—(From “Diarrhea of a Poopy Kid”): “You were the only one interested in my innovative new menu. I was like you when I was a kid, you know. That’s how I got interested in cooking. And as soon as you pass that sip test, I’ll eat dinner with you.” —Bob
Bonus: “🎶 I could still be a winner, when I eat Dad’s Thanksgiving dinner! 🎶” —Gene
“That was beautiful, Gene 🥲” —Bob
“Thank you, Father~” —Gene
—(From “Mazel-Tina”): “Wow, Dad. I never realized how soulful your eyes are.” —Gene
“*Sighs* Gene. Wait, really?” —Bob
—(From “The Hauntening”): “Dad. I think you’re doing a really good job as a Dad.” —Gene
“Okay.” —Bob
“I’m having a really good childhood.” —Gene
“Okay, great.” —Bob
“Not right now, but overall.” —Gene
“I got it, thanks.” —Bob
“No, thank you. Thank you for your service.” —Gene
(From “Lil’ Hard Dad”): “You’re still my hero, Dad 😌” —Gene
“You’re mine too, Gene.” —Bob
(From “Broadcast Wagstaff School News”): “*Gasps* Travel-Sized Bob, awwwwww!!” —Linda
Bonus: “Muppet baby Bobby!!! :D” —Linda
(From “Lindapendent Woman”): “I’d rather be scraping by together than have extra money and be apart.” —Bob, AKA the best husband ever
(From “Mother Daughter Laser Razor”): “Wait. Mom. You don’t think I like you?” —Louise
Bonus (just for you, Babs!): “They just needed to see things from each other’s perspective 🥹” —Logan Barry Bush
(From “A-Sprout A Boy”): “I’ll never make you eat vegetables for breakfast, sweetie.” —Linda
“I love you, Mom (:” —Louise
(From “The Pickleorette”): “Oh my God, of course I’d hold your hand. I don’t want you to be scared. You’re my big, strong boy.”
(From "Sliding Bobs"): “Hey! You’ve got a lot of nerve picking on girl’s diamond rings with your thick, luxurious, Tom Selleckian mustache….. Hi.” —Linda
“Hi. My eyes are up here. Should we get some scissors?” —Bob
“What’s the rush? 😏” —Linda
(From “Large Brother, Where Fart Thou?”): “Thank you, Gene. You’re a great large brother.” —Louise
“Anytime, shrimp.” -Gene, AKA the best big brother ever
(From “A Few ‘Gurt Men”): “I’m good at law!” —Gene, AKA the best lawyer ever
(From “Carpe Museum”): “So, when you take over the restaurant, will you call it Louise’s Burgers?” —Bob
“I don’t know. Maybe. Daddy.” —Louise
(From “Hawk and Chick”): “This Hawk and Chick will never not talk for thirty years!” —Bob
(I forgot which episode this is from but if someone can tell me, that would be much appreciated!): "I've got a license to counsel." --Mr. Frond
"Double O-So-Sad." --Louise
"Louise. Be nice." --Bob
"Why? It's Mr. Frond!" --Louise
(From "The Frond Files"): "I LOCKED MYSELF IN A RUH-OOOM WHILE CHILDREN WERE EATEN!!!!!!!!!!!!" --Mr. Frond
I need to cut myself off now but there are even more quotes I could’ve added 😭
#bobs burgers#asks#okay maybe i should’ve expanded the list because now i’m kicking myself for not adding a couple of the honorable mentions into the main lis#just pretend bob and linda’s first meeting “anytime shrimp” and louise calling bob “daddy” are all on the main list#here i go again making my answers for an ask WAY too long but you know what? i don’t care because i had so much fun with this#thank you for giving me an excuse to ramble babs❣️
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