#sorry im just peeved and need to get it out of my system. im sure ill acclimate to all these changes its just. god | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

imustbenuts · 1 month

Note

kzmj anon again hi. the weird relationships with the cabaret girls in k2 sucks so bad it really feels like the devs went uh sorry for making the majima everywhere system so homoerotically charged here take some dubiously ethical heterosexuality with 0 chemistry

hi kzmj anon senpai

yeah it is. soooo forced. this feels a lot like the game saying "kiryu is straight we swear" when. majima. exists in the game and did all of that MES in k1, had kiryu outright admit that he feels more relaxed in front of goromi than the cabaret girls. when in y0 kiryu was presented with oda's feelings towards tachibana point blank with oda saying he liked tachibana in the non-platonic sense here

and then having rina swinging a sledgehammer to kiryu's sense of heterosexuality to the point that he had to sort it out on some level...

basically the concept of same-sex attraction has already been shoved into his mind, but the game pretends like it never happened or that kiryu was incapable of considering it. which is. a big contradiction if im supposed to believe that the guy has compassion and empathy to the point of accepting all the misfits he comes across...

it feels like backtracking and being insincere and unwilling to commit to a possibility of kiryu self-reflecting before k2 starts. this brute forcing is not working. i see some minor sparks with kaoru sayama and kiryu 10 hours into k2 but im pretty sure they are gonna fumble the bag so hard given the vibes im picking up overall.

kiryu in yk2 needs like. a female platonic bestie. someone he talks to on the same level with seonhee in y8 (their interactions are fucking amazing, more of THAT please)

ofc there can be a possibility that he isnt the type of person/character to reflect or apply that empathy and compassion to himself. bc he sure is doing some weird things in the name of chivalry and short term goals

after playing y1k my pet peeve is just how insincere parts of the story overall feels. how embarrassment seems baked into the series and even kiryu himself so far because they didn't want to fucking commit (just like kiryu's reflecting bucket list thing going on in y8).

ironically because majima is actually sincere and utterly shameless about his nonsense, majima ends up being best character by default imo so far. >_>;;

im just. genuinely baffled about some of the writing choices here even for the female interests. like u say theres little to no chemistry. i dont know what normal everyday things kiryu and this lady friend would enjoy together and talk about.

(and also part where yumi essentially gets killed for daring to try to move on with jingu while her love is in jail: what the actual fuck, man. still pisses me off thinking about it. this is straight up evil on the ethical heterosexuality scale.)

sorry it got too long, i wanted to justify how im open to straight kiryu if the writing wasnt so garbage. im resonating with some of the ace vibes im picking up from this character but. im just. ggggrh... the girls are written like utter shit outside of y7 and y8 it feels like too.

#yakuza #kiryu kazuma

3 notes · View notes

raineydays411 · 3 years

Text

My fathers daughter

prologue

Tony Stark x daughter! reader

Summary: By all definitions you were a daddy’s girl. It’s been you and him since your mom left you both. But what happens when your both forced to face your past?

a/n: y’all know i can’t resist a good crossover

If there had to be a face for daddys girl, you’d be the poster child.

Ever since you came into Tony’s life, you and him have been attached by the hip.

You were with him through everything.

When he became Iron Man, when he joined the avengers, and even during civil war. Even though it hurt you to see your family be torn apart, you could never betray your father. Then again, you have to admit that you were happy that the avengers compromised and were able to get back together. Earning you a new family member in Bucky. You were happy. Happy with the life you have with your dad and avengers.

Which is why your mother suddenly reappearing and demanding to be in your life kinda of peeved you off.

Let’s start from the beginning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It started off with a gala.

Some bougie charity event that rich assholes attend to donate large sums of money, not out of kindness, but only to show just how rich they are. You hated these types of events. You hated the fake smiles and false interest in your life. All they wanted was to get close to your dad. They even try to set you up with their snobby stuck up kids. You hated it.

And here you were, trying to find a way to get out of this boring conversation with some snob from Beverly hills. You can see your dad laughing at you from across the room.

“You know, you look a lot like Mrs. Wayne.” He suddenly says, looking at you.

“Who?” You ask, suddenly paying attention.

“Mrs. Wayne, you know, Bruce Wayne's wife.”

You know who Bruce Wayne was. Your dad absolutely detestes the man. He never really told you why. He just said to never trust a Wayne. You also know that he’s Batman and his army of children are/were Robin. It was pretty obvious and rather easy to figure out. Then again, you were able to hack into the Bat computers main systems. They really need to update their firewalls.

“Um no I didn’t know that he had a wife to be honest.” You reply, not really interested.

“You can pass as her daughter you know? She is very beautiful. As are you.” He says in a flirty tone.

You roll your eyes, seeing your father finishing up a conversation and make your move, but then you hear

“Oh look, there's the Wayne family right there.”

Causing the attention to turn to the main entrance. There you saw Bruce Wayne. Tall, handsome, and charismatic. He was smiling, waving at the host. Next to him, his oldest son Dick. Another very handsome man, Tall with blue eyes and raven hair. Sending charming smiles to the crowds of women. Then Tim Drake, too focused on his phone to pay attention to the crowds, and finally Damian Wayne. A small boy with a sharp scowl. To his left, you can barely make out the form of his wife and his daughter, Cassandra Cain. You can also see Stephanie Brown chatting excitedly to Mrs. Wayne, who you still couldn’t see.

“Jeez, they brought the whole cavalry.” You mutter, looking at the star struck boy you were talking to.

You roll your eyes. The way people worship this family is strange. They act as if they are royalty or gods. You look at your father, expecting him to be making a sarcastic face or something. But that’s not what you saw. No, you saw a look on his face that you haven’t seen on his face ever. That’s when you walked up to him.

“Daddy...are you okay?” You asked cautiously. He turned to you, shocked.

“Y/n!” He practically shouts, “ I’m okay, are you okay? We can leave right now if you’re not okay?”

You frown in confusion, “ Umm yeah, I’m fine...”

“Good, Good. We’re going to leave now, this gala kinda blows. DOn’t you think?”

You can see his eyes dart to the Waynes to you. He looks...panicked. It was weird to you. Usually he keeps his cool during events like these.

“Um sure..I just need to go to the restroom first” You say, seeing him nod. You walk off, shaking off the concern you have for your father. As you push through the crowds, you can hear them whisper as you passed. Something about Mrs. Wayne.

You shake your head, “Can’t they talk about anything else??”

Then you finally find the bathroom. You walk in, expecting it to be empty, only to be faced with Cassandra Cain and Stephanie Brown. They were chatting near the sinks as you walking into the stall. After doing your business, you walked out to the sink, going to wash your hands, but you saw Stephanie freeze, then nudge Cassandra. They both stared at you as you washed your hands and went to dry them. You give them a side eye, wondering why they were staring at you so hard.

“Um hi?” You say carefully, the jump not expecting you to speak.

“Oh! Hello Im Stephanie and this is Cass” Stephanie says with a smile. “ You’re Y/n Stark right?”

“Uh yeah...Its nice to meet you dudes” You say quickly, already ready to walk out the restroom.

“I’m sorry for staring, it’s just that...you look a lot like her mother” She says gesturing to Cassandra.

You chuckle, “ Uh yeah so I’ve heard...hey I gotta go...”

“Oh right! Sorry heh” Stephanie laughs nervously, “It was great to meet you”

“Yeah” You agree half heartedly, “ You too”

And with that you go to find your father. You pass by the Wayne sons, only to see them take a double take when you pass them.

“God that family is weird.” You mumble seeing your father talking to Bruce and his wife. He looked distressed and angry. You speed up, wanting to make sure your father doesn’t punch Bruce Wayne the way he looks like he's going to.

“Hey dad...um I’m ready to go.” You says with your back turned on the Waynes.

“Y/n..” Your dad says panic exploding on his face, “ Y/n sweetheart um...”

“Yn?” You hear a woman whisper. You turn to see Bruce Wayne and...your mother.

You remember the day she left. It was a sunny day. The kind of days that usually are in good memories and have happy endings. She was supposed to take you to the park so you can meet your dad there. You hardly saw her over the years, just every three months when she would come to the then Stark Tower to visit. But that say...that day was different. She had gotten a call, from who you don’t know, nut it seemed important. Because she left at that very moment and never came back. She never reached out, never called, texted or anything. Just radio silence. Your dad was heart broken. He had hoped that one day she would move in with you and him, and you could be a family. He loved her with his whole heart, but she just didn’t love you both enough to stay. He was a mess after she left, and you picked up the pieces.

You were nine.

If it wasn’t for Pepper stepping in after witnessing one of his breakdowns, you don’t know what would’ve happened.

You stare at the woman who left you, who broke your fathers heart. Who broke your heart.

“Ms. Wayne.” you say curtly, taking pleasure in the way her face fell, “ Mr. Wayne, it’s lovely to see you again. If you’ll excuse me and my father, it seems like he’s not feeling too well.”

You weren’t lying, Tony looked like he was about to puke. His face was pale and he was kinda sweaty. So you wrapped your arm around him and lead him to the entrance, starting to pull out your phone to call Happy.

“Y/n wait!” Your mother cried out, pulling her arm away from Bruce and placing a hand in your shoulder. You jerked your shoulder out of her grasp.

“ Y/n, I know you’re mad at me” she starts, cringing when she hears you scoff, “ But wait a second. Let me look at you...my petal you’re so big.”

You turn and glare at her, “ Don’t call me that.”

“Oh Y/n, please—“You cut her off again.

“Hey i’m just going along with what you want. This is what you wanted right? No contact with us?”

You can see a crowd start to form around you, and you see the scattered Wayne’s push through it. They look at each other in confusion trying to understand how you seem to know their mother.

“ Of course that’s not what I wanted, oh petal I meant to call I just...” She trailed off

“Couldn’t be bothered?” you say harshly, “ I couldn’t care less. Just leave us alone. That should be easy for you.”

You feel your dad tug on your hand, and you turn to him. Eyes softening when you see the expression on his face.

“ Happys here kiddo.” He says softly. You nod and start to walk away. And you hear your mother protest, but you cut her off with a venomous,

“It was nice seeing you again Mom.”

and then you were gone. This time, leaving your mother behind and her confused husband and children.

#tony stark x daughter!reader #tony stark x teen!reader #tony stark x reader #tony stark imagine #dc comics x reader #marvel x reader #batfam x batsis #batfam x reader #tony is a good dad #poc reader #reader insert #avengers x reader #crossover

2K notes · View notes

santiagostyle · 7 years

Note

hi this is me sending u every single emoji from the ask meme bc im too lazy to type out just the ones i want to ask

dammit jo why u gotta do this to me (jk I’m excited) (also I deleted some questions bc I’m stupid and idk what half of them mean or how to answer them COOL)

Send me emojis!

(hella long post sorry in advance)

☝ - How tall are you?

5′6″ I’m pretty sure

✔ - Sexual Orientation

Lmao good question

🚬 - Do you Smoke?

I mean ??? No but I’ve tried it does that count

🍷 - Do you Drink?

On occasion yes

♒ - Do you Take Drugs?

Negative

😳 - Age you get mistaken for?

TBH either 15 or 25 there is no in between

💉 - Have Tattoos?

Nope

✏️ - Want any tattoos?

Maybe?? Most likely a Florence lyric (”I’m gonna be free and I’m gonna be fine”) but I have no idea where I would get it

✂️ - Got any Piercings?

I have three piercings in each earlobe

✌ - Want any piercings?

Maybe a cartilage piercing or something idk

👌 - Best friend?

I have several and their names are Sandra, Temiqua, Macy, Layne, Megan, and there’s more ok I’m stressed I can’t list them all I’ll be here all day

♥ - Do you like anyone?

Unfortunately yes I think so but I’m pretty sure I’m getting over it

🎤 - Top 5 favorite bands?

Florence + The Machine, The Fray, Daughter, Prince (and the Revolution/and the N.P.G), The Cranberries

Special mention to: Marina & The Diamonds, Lana Del Rey (I know she’s a singer not a band but I love her don’t @ me)

🎶 - Top 5 favorite songs?

Sucker - Peaches

Salvation - The Cranberries

Lying - Amy Meredith

Caught - Florence + The Machine

America - XYLØ

Special mention to:

Raspberry Beret - Prince (for sentimental reasons)

Shut Up and Dance - Walk The Moon (also sentimental reasons)

Wake Me Up - Avicii (you guessed it)

Regular Touch - Vera Blue

Little Numbers - BOY

😒 - Biggest pet peeve?

People who take advantage of the fact that you love them

📝 - Story from your childhood.

I don’t really have any interesting stories from my childhood but I have one super embarrassing one… when I was little I used to get really really bad migraines pretty often and one time when I was in 1st grade I got super sick super fast and I went outside to get a drink of water and I ended up throwing up on (in? idk) somebody’s backpack and wow it was horrible and I don’t know why I’m sharing this

💬 - I wish…

I wish I didn’t get distracted/frustrated so easily bc I have so many ideas and I don’t have the focus or patience to follow through with a lot of them

‼️ - Something you’ll change?

I mean hopefully I’ll stop procrastinating at some point but that’s unlikely

💦 - What makes you horny?

JFC going to church and hearing the word of the Lord!!!!! anyway this is an inaPPROPRIATE QUESTION (I’m kidding there’s a similar question further down I might be more serious there)

🌟 - A wish you’ll wish for?

Well if I put it here it won’t come true now will it

🔥 - Something spicy you like?

I like green curry from the Chinese restaurant my family always orders from

👃 You hate the smell of ….

Fish ugh

👊 - Something you hate?

Discrimination in any way shape or form ugh

🚶 - Are you single?

Yes

💭 - Favorite foods?

I really love Nutella and burritos (not together)

☀ - Story about your day.

I had an 8:30am lecture so that was fun (sarcasm, people) and then a seminar right afterwards, then grabbed lunch with some pals from uni then came home and read fan fiction tbh my life is wild

💘 - Top 5 celebrity crushes?

Melissa Fumero, Stephanie Beatriz, Andy Samberg, Robert Downey Jr, James Marsters circa 1999-2000

Special mention to: Ian Harding, Jude Law, Camilla Belle, Eliza Dushku, Keira Knightley, Karla Souza, Katie McGrath, Sarah Michelle Gellar circa 2001 jfc I love a lot of people

🎥 - Top 5 favorite movies?

Celeste & Jesse Forever: this movie ruined my life but I love it so much and also refuse to watch it ever again

Last Night: I was so angry at the end of this movie my best friend had to stop me from throwing her computer across the room but GOD it’s so so good

Cruel Intentions: look I was like 15 when I first watched this movie and I was in no way prepared and tbh I am still #shook by how much people got away with in the 90s (and also… SMG with dark hair amirite)

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows: idk I like mystery movies and Robert Downey Jr and this is such a guilty pleasure movie I watch it all the time

The Emperor’s New Groove: I will fight anyone who thinks this is not the greatest cinematic masterpiece ever created okay I’ve loved it since I first watched it when I was like 2 years old and I still love it just as much now

Special mentions:

Stoker: I studied this movie in school and good GOD I will never understand why the Board of Studies thought it was appropriate to show Year 11 students but it’s so beautifully shot and it’s so weird and bizarre and unsettling and I love it

The Road to El Dorado: a childhood favourite and a comedic masterpiece and I literally forced all my friends to watch it with me on my 18th birthday it was wonderful

Bridesmaids: just bloody hilarious and I remember the first time my mum and I watched it together we were literally in tears by the end of it bc we were laughing so hard

📺 - Top 5 favorite TV shows?

Brooklyn 99: (duh) I don’t even need to explain this one

Utopia: I always describe this show as “the Australian version of The Office” even though I’ve never actually watched The Office but it’s just such wonderful Australian humour and I love it

Summer Heights High: another Aussie classic and good lord it’s so politically incorrect and full of horrible jokes but it’s basically an Australian rite of passage and as such I love it

How to Get Away With Murder: I love trying to solve everything and it’s funny and thrilling and also the cast is so beautiful

Thank God You’re Here: this show isn’t on anymore but I love improv so much and I love all the people who starred on it and god it was hilarious

Special mentions:

Have You Been Paying Attention?, Jane the Virgin, Gilmore Girls

✏ - Random fact about yourself.

I skipped Kindergarten??

✈️ - Where are you from?

Sydney, Australia

🚀 - Where do you wanna visit?

Europe. Just,,, everywhere

😍 - Do you have a crush?

I think so ??? I know I used to but idk if I’m over it yet

😷 - Something you hate eating?

Tomato

🙈 - What makes you shy?

MAKING PHONE CALLS

💃 - Can you dance?

I’m a dancer so I certainly hope so

💏 - Do you love anyone?

I love a lot of people but not romantically if that’s what this question means

👟 - Favorite shoe(s) to wear?

Idk I have this one pair of boots I wear pretty much every day

🌴 - A island you would visit?

I really want to go to Cuba

🌎 - A country you would visit?

Spain

🌀 - Favorite type of weather?

Thunderstorms, if I’m inside

🔮 - Do you believe in luck?

Yes

📱 - What kinda phone do you have?

iPhone SE

📅 - Favorite time of the year?

Christmas

📚 - Career goal you want?

Anything in the arts - acting, taking photos, writing, cinematography, dancing, producing, directing, stage handing, screenwriting, literally anything I’ll take it

🍭 - Favorite Candy?

TBH I love lollipops, specifically Chupa Chups

(story time: one of my Year 12 teachers made a habit of bringing a whole packet of Chupa Chups to class every lesson because our class just would not shut up otherwise)

🍇 - Favorite fruits?

Strawberries, peaches, blackberries

🚘 - Dream car(s)?

I don’t really have one but I used to really want a Mercedes

🚔 - Have you ever been arrested?

Negative

🚑 - Have you ever driven in an ambulance before?

No but I’ve had to call one

🎫 - Do you have a license?

I have my learner’s but can’t drive by myself yet lol I’m working on it

🚼 - Do you have or want kids?

I don’t have any and I don’t know if I want any

🔞 - Are you under 18?

Negative I’m 19

🐶 - Do you own a pet?

No :(

😔 - Something that makes you sad?

The fact that there are so many people struggling (particularly with mental illness) and feeling hopeless/like they don’t have a support system

😡 - What pisses you off?

Literally just discrimination of any kind but also people who are arrogant and condescending and passive aggressive

😏 - What turns you on?

I mean idk I don’t really have a whole lot of anecdotal evidence ya know but generally I’m a pretty tactile person so physical contact is usually a good time I guess

😈 - Are you a freak?

Idk probably

💪 - Do you work out?

I dance and do yoga every week, does that count?

#GOD THIS IS SO LONG I'M SORRY #also nobody is going to read this why did I spend an hour answering it kms #self #not b99 #about me

1 note · View note

fluffyllamas-23 · 7 years

Text

Don’t worry about me

Okay so I know only like three people are following me, but I’ve been wanting to post something here for a while. I’ve posted this on another site, but I fixed It up a bit. Hopefully it doesn’t totally suck. Anyways, shout out to @toosicktoocare for giving me the nudge to post on here.

Spencer chewed on the end of his pencil, and tapped his fingers absentmindedly on his desk as he stared at his computer screen. He had been staring at the page for so long that all of the words and pictures were blending together and swirling on the page. He rubbed at his eyes and let out a sigh.

He was distracted, his mind kept drifting to his girlfriend. He had texted and called her a few times over the last two days, but still no response. Harper’s read receipts were on, so he could see that she saw them.

Obviously, he wasn’t expecting her to drop everything and respond, she had a life, but being blatantly ignored was one of his pet peeves. She knew it, too. He could feel himself growing more and more agitated by the moment, if he did something to make her upset, he wanted to know so that he could fix it.

Then, his phone buzzed with a new text. When he saw her name on the screen, he scowled in frustration.

Harper (now) iMessage (1)

He let out a heavy sigh, sliding the screen to see what she could possibly want.

‘Can you bring me some tea? Hot.’

He sat up straighter, clenching his jaw as annoyance rolled off him in waves. 'I see you’ve finally decided to respond. I thought you dropped off the face of the earth.’

'Sorry…been sick…could you please bring it?’

His frustration and annoyance was replaced with worry instantaneously. 'Are you okay?’

'Im fine.’

He grabbed his keys and wallet from next to his laptop, and stood up so fast that he nearly knocked the chair over. 'Yeah, I’ll be over there soon. Do you need anything else?’

'No.’

Twenty minutes later, he was filled with instant regret over two things. The first one being that he still hadn’t put her key on his keychain, and it was at home. The second thing being that because he forgot the key, she was now having to get up to let him in. If she was sick, he didn’t want her up and around. She wasn’t one to mention that she wasn’t feeling well, either. She usually just powered through it, so he had a feeling this was bad.

He waited impatiently for her to come to the door, and just as he was about to kick it in, it finally opened. Harper stood in front of him, a blanket wrapped tightly around her shoulders. Her short blonde hair was sticking up in most directions, and if she didn’t look so miserable, he would be laughing. Her normally tan face was almost completely pale, aside from the deep red fever flush that had spread across her cheeks. There was a thin sheen of sweat covering her face, and he felt even more guilty for being mad at her.

She stared back at him blankly, swaying lightly on her feet. Recognition flashed in her eyes, and she sniffled.

“Sorry for not answering you.” She rasped weakly, her voice thick with congestion. “I’ve had the worst migraine the past couple of days.” “Don’t even worry about it.” He said softly, stepping inside her apartment. “Let’s get you back to bed, yeah?” She coughed into the blankets and then nodded. “Okay.” “I have your tea.” He said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. He inhaled sharply, and then felt her cheek with the back of his fingers. She closed her eyes, leaning into his touch with a relieved sigh. “Your hand feels nice.” “Tch. You’re running one hell of a fever there, Harper. Go get in bed, I’ll be there in a minute.” She shuffled back into her room, coughing again.

Now he felt like a giant ass. She was sick, and he was getting all pissy because she wasn’t answering his texts.

‘Poor baby’, he thought bitterly.

Spencer gathered up some medicine, water, soup and the thermometer before walking into her room. She was a lying underneath a pile of blankets, and once he was sitting on the edge of her bed, he pulled the blankets down and off her face.

“I’m sorry you’re sick.” He frowned, glancing at all the supplies he had placed on her nightstand. She stifled a series of sneezes into the blankets, and let out a low groan of discomfort. “My head hurts, Spence.” “I know.” He sighed. “Have you taken anything for the fever?” “No…I’ve only been out of bed to go to the bathroom and open the door for you.” “Have you had anyone with you?” She shook her head again as she took them. “No.” “Harper.” He scolded lightly. “If you’re too sick to get out of bed, you need to call someone. Why didn’t you tell me?” “It hurt too much to use my phone. I didn’t even read your texts.” He pursed his lips. “How bad’s the headache?“ "Still hurts really bad, but nowhere close to migraine status.” She mumbled. “I’m really, really sorry for not answering you…I know you were probably mad at me.” “I was.” He grinned. “You don’t have any reason to be sorry, though. I should be sorry.” “But-” “Harper, you’re sick.” He said firmly. “You had a migraine, migraines suck, I understand why you didn’t respond.” She sighed. “Sorry.” “Stop apologizing.” He chuckled, poking her cheek.“I take it you haven’t eaten in almost two days then?” “No.” “Are you nauseous?” “I was, 'cause of the migraine, but not anymore.” “You need something to eat.” “I’m not hungry.” “Do I really look like I care?” He asked gently. “I know eating is the last thing you want to do right now, but you need something in your system. Especially with that fever.” She groaned, hiding her face in the blankets. “If you make me eat, I’ll hate you forever.” He rolled his eyes. “Okay, drama queen. Show me your face, I need to take your temperature.” “No you don’t.” She grumbled. “I do, though.” He pulled the blankets down and squeezed her cheeks so he could stick the thermometer in her mouth.

She let out a squawk of indignation and glared at him.

Any other time, she might have looked genuinely angry, but she looked too pitiful to take seriously. Once the thermometer beeped, he took it from her, and placed a kiss to her temple.

“One oh two.” He sighed, and handed her some medicine and the tea. “Sit up. I want you to take the medicine, and then you need to sleep. I’ll get you some food when you wake up.” “I still don’t want food.” “I still don’t care.” He said in a sing-song voice as he poked her cheek. Harper shot him the evil eye as she pushed herself into a sitting position. Her head swam at the sudden change in position, and she let out a groan. She clutched her head as the throbbing increased, and then let out a string of sneezes into her lap. Once she had taken the medicine, she laid back down and patted the space beside her. “Lie down with me.” She rasped, smothering a coughing fit into the blankets. “You sure? You don’t need anything? Tissues?” He asked anxiously. “No…just you.” Spencer kicked off his shoes and climbed over her. As soon as he was lying down, she wrapped her arm around his waist, put her head on his chest, and intertwined her legs with his. “I love you, get some sleep.” She nodded sleepily, her eyelids drooping as she drifted to sleep.

#I'm sorry if this was boring #it probably was #please don't hate me #holy cow it's so late #sorry for any typos #I have more written so if you guys like it I can post more #Spencer and Harper

15 notes · View notes

azurera · 7 years

Text

I know you are supposted to get one in your askbox. but guess what. i dont give a shit, and i’m bored as fuck so i did them all. my memory is shit atm so i dont remember some answers to some of these. and my grammar is shit but do with it what you want. g’night ya’ll ~

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? more milk, because i can always drink the extra milk, the other way around you would end up with dry cereal and thats just bleh.

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? no

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? everything i can find. most unique thing is probably a 10 Gulden bill (very old dutch currency before the euro)

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? I trow as much crap in my coffee as i possible can, sugar, milk. more milk than coffee. give it to me cold, add alcohol. i dont give a shit. thea is just nice to have a little suger thats it. let me enjoy the flaver itself.

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? 9/10 times probably yeah

6: do you keep plants? since a few weeks i sometimes get flowers, so you could say i kind of own plants some times.

7: do you name your plants? i should

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? i scream into the void

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? no, because i sound terrible

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? side mostly. or when im really tired my back. usually not my stomach because .. well.. boobs.

11: what's an inner joke you have with your friends? if i had friends.... no idea tho. i have so many jokes, my life included.

12: what's your favorite planet? PLUTO. VIVA LA PLUTO. the little rings on saturn are also nice. shit this could have been a nice opportunity to make a uranus joke..

13: what's something that made you smile today? i didnt

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? lots of pillows

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! 99% of our soular system’s mass is the sun

16: what's your favorite pasta dish? i dont know. but those swirly things are cute.

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? every. colour. at. once.

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. i try to stack those memories far far away.

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? i dont

20: what's your favorite eye color? i dont have a favorite eye colour. but i love eyes that look like space nebulas.

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that's been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. i bought a nice leather bag on castlefest. its very usefull nice and small but it can fit more in it than you think.

22: are you a morning person? if by morning you mean still awake at 4, then yes.

23: what's your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? lay my dead body to rest on my couch and cuddel with my cat

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? probably not

25: what's the weirdest place you've ever broken into? my own house? i dont really break into places.

26: what are the shoes you've had for forever and wear with every single outfit? i have to many shoes man..

27: what's your favorite bubblegum flavor? the really over the top fruity onces

28: sunrise or sunset? sunset, (becouse im not a fucking morning person)

29: what's something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? im thinking of to many things at once and yet nothing comes up.

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? way to many times.

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. i only own black socks, becouse then you never have the problem of looking for a pair. sometimes im all for socks, i wear them even when i take of all my other clothes just becouse they are soft and then i wear them to bed and they magicaly disappear. but since i wear dresses a lot i also wear panty’s and stuff. so its not always socks.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. usually that invloves a lot of alcohol. which means that i don’t really rememeber a lot. (which is also probably for the better)

33: what's your fave pastry? pie

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? i think it was a little lion called simba. and im sure its in a box somewhere.

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? yes i love them. but i dont use them a lot becouse a) not many people write me letters and b) i could. write them first. but obviously im a lazy fuck.

36: which band's sound would fit your mood right now? i just really prefer silence right now.

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? i like keeping it clean, but we all know thats not happening.

38: tell us about your pet peeves! i do not know right now. i think

39: what color do you wear the most? black.....

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what's it's story? does it have any meaning to you? the 3 things I always wear are a ring my grandma got me, a ring my mother bought for my 18 birthday that she switched her old wedding rings for. and a mjolnor necklace. I just saw so many people with one. and i really wanted to have one aswell, but not just any, so i went and looked all over this fantasy event and i’ve honestly seen every single mjolnor necklace they had, and then i picked this one.

41: what's the last book you remember really, really loving? the girl on the train was a nice book (the film a little less) it was just nice to have a book that i could go through quickly.

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! not really

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? god its been to long...

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? i still wish for this day...

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? mmmaybe

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. i can not make one up right now. i need to have the righ feel in the right moment.

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? PINAPPLE ON PIZZA, PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA, PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? death. yes.

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? I only own a few CD’s, and a few LP’s the last one i think was a supernatural christmas cd thing.

50: what's an odd thing you collect? those prayer cards with the picture of the person, you get at a funeral. i have quite a lot of them, so you could say i collect them.

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? suddenly

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? i like the “you cant xx if you don’t xxx” memes. those make for some good jokes. other than that i make my own memes, fresh and local.

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? only parts... i should watch them shouldn’t i..

54: who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? u know who u are.. im sorry..

55: what's the most dramatic thing you've ever done to prove a point? i secretly moved out in a pretty dramatic way to prove my mom that i couldnt go on like that...

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? when they shut the fuck up

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? i do not feel like listening to it now, thats how its making me feel.

58: who's the wine mom and who's the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? im both.

59: what's your favorite myth? nice people are my favorite mythical creatures.

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? im not really into poetry tho, but sometimes there is one thats just nice, discribing beaty in such a subtle way, that i like it.

61: what's the stupidest gift you've ever given? the stupidest one you've ever received? i don’t give stupid gifts. people either get something epic from me or nothing at all. go big or go home.

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? ive been drinking this strawberry/apple/ bananna juice stuff sometimes, makes me feel like i try to be healthy.

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? i keep them in an organized mess (just like my life)

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? its a lovely gradient of light blue/white/ to a bit darker blue.

65: is there anyone you haven't seen in a long time who you'd love to hang out with? so many people, i suck at being social.

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? ALL THE COLORS

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? sometimes its nice to stare out of the window on those days.

68: what's winter like where you live? shitty

69: what are your favorite board games? i like playing monopoly and slowly see the light dissappear from my friends eyes. or cluedo you know, murder.

70: have you ever used a ouija board? no

71: what's your favorite kind of tea? its this one thea they have at the cinema, the pink one. the rosy stuff. its so good.

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it? i should note it down. but then i forget to read it. so yeah, ill mess up either way.

73: what are some of your worst habits? i tent to complain a lot, becouse i always hope it will make me feel better when there is to much going on in my head. but sometimes i just keep going, and i dont even know how bad its getting, and i probably pull myself down into some negative spiral and well then we’re fucked again.

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. you fucking pancakes.

75: tell us about your pets! MY CAT IS THE MOST ADORABLE LITTLE SHIT, HE IS SO CUTE. AND LOVES CUDDLES. AND HIS FLUFFYNESS IS. i can keep going forever.

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren't? its getting pretty late. i should sleep.

77: pink or yellow lemonade? mmmpink?

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? i hate them.

79: what's one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? im trying to think of one. but my memmory is shit atm.

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? just white. makes it look bigger.

81: describe one of your friend's eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. NEBULAS

82: are/were you good in school? soommeeetimessss

83: what's some of your favorite album art? I do like GACKT his album art tho. the costumes he wears are nice.

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? i have been thinking of this design of a music G thingy that looks like a cat. its really cute. but i cant even commit to where i put a sticker let a lone where to put a tattoo.

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? i have quite a lot of constantine comics, to satisfy the fact that the series quit after 1 season.

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? no idea

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? stonehenge appocalpyse

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? not sure

89: are you close to your parents? *crying sounds*

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. i love all cities except the one i live in. Im such a slut for older building and architecture. old gothic churches man. oh my god.

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? france, for sad stuff, and i hope to see my german potato this year <3 if i can make it...

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? SMOTHER THE FUCKER IN CHEESE.

93: what's the hairstyle you wear the most? just long, straight now. or either in like a clip. when its to hot to have it all down.

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? i saw on my calander at internship that one collegue had his birthday today.

95: what are your plans for this weekend? convention staff meeting on saturday, looking into something for sunday..

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? *hysterical laughter*

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? no idea, leo, huffelpuf

98: when's the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? in germany i think. to long ago. i love mountains, and walks, and beaches.

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. PIANO’S

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years into the past to kill myself. :”D absoluutly.

#blep

2 notes · View notes

seedling-lotus · 5 years

Text

today has been such a fucking shit show and i’m going to rant about it under the cut because i need to vent in a huge way

oh my gods... i just... i fucking can’t even. i barely know where to start, but i’m gonna start at the beginning. I work second shift for a multi-billion dollar shipping company in the heavy freight division. so this is pallets of things weighing, for the most part, over a hundred pounds. This is some big shit. but whatever so I work second shift. My shift starts at 2 in the afternoon. perfect hours for a night owl like myself.

so i got up, had breakfast, went to therapy, came home and did the dishes, took my car through the car wash and went to work. all fine and dandy. a good start to the day. get to work. terminal manager has gone home. before i even got there. by, like, a while. I mean, no really big deal there. at least i don’t have to deal with the guy. (he’s a fucking moron. he doesn’t know how to do anything and he’s a condescending, sexist, racist, homophobic ass.) the supervisor covering the outbound shift is running late. also no big deal. can’t stand him either.

so whatever, first hour or so goes pretty smoothly. i get settled in, start doing my work, run into my first snafu. but i was distracted, doing a couple things, didn’t realize how big of a snafu it was. in the mean time the supervisor comes in and gets himself settled and is generally annoying, which gets me peeved. i go out on the dock, come back, go out, whatever. I can barely remember exactly why, but work was being done.

meanwhile dick ass supervisor somehow gets into a conversation about anti-depressants with one of the clerks so i walk into that. I take the clerk’s side that meds can be helpful. bible thumping jesus freak skin head asshole supe insists that medication is a scam and it can’t help you and blah blah blah. got me so steamed i’m litterally screaming at him. I storm out before i punch the ass in the face. get some more work done

and back to my snafu from earlier. except it’s less snafu and more total fubar. I shoot the driver related to said fubar a message and he calls up with some lame ass excuse for said fubar. so i’m fucking fuming. go out on the dock. i’m looking at this trailer, and the paperwork and i’m i’m so pissed i’m not even angry anymore. I’m resigned. and also fucking determined to get it sorted out.

now mind you. there is only one dockworker present at the moment. trucks are starting to come back with the afternoon freight. i need to get this sorted, and i need to get it sorted NOW. But this dick doesn’t want to do it. he wants to leave it for one of the new guys. I insist. he still wants to leave it for a new guy. he asks for a different trailer. I tell him i’m not printing any paperwork until this shit gets sorted. he finally relents to stripping this trailer for me. (mind you, i had half a mind to strip the thing myself, but i had to go through the pallets as they were coming out and it would have taken longer if I stripped it.) But whatever, he strips the pallets out and I start going through them. I match the pallets up to the bills that I had and put new tracking numbers on absolutely everything. everything had to be re-done. none of it was right. great. it took me over half an hour to go through all 39 pallets and make sure everything was right.

so I get that sorted, entered into the system i’m still fuming about the whole thing with the supe from earlier and this so i’m just tense and angry and it’s barely 5:00 and i’m already done with the day. I’m just ready to fucking go home.

only to find out that one of the driver’s handheld computer died. which now means that, when he gets back, i have to manually enter everything he does. great. another fun thing to worry about.

work gets done. 7:00 rolls around. one of the night drivers comes in early to help on the dock. he’s an ass and he wants to murder me and at this point i’d love to see him try. i’ll feed him his own fucking dick i do not give a fuck. he starts pressing my buttons and bringing up the bitch that i replaced when i took this job. she was a horrible person and she was specifically a complete pan in my ass and interfered with my ability to do my job when i was working on the dock. she was evil and i hate her. but he loves her and wishes she would come back and is singing her praises and shitting on me and generally being an extremely loud nuisance. mind you, the phone starts ringing. it is someone who has called multiple times and they’re being really nice about how much we fucked up since we never sent their stuff out to deliver and they need it urgently so we were sending it out late and they were calling to check on it. dick driver wont shut the fuck up. he’s practically yelling. so i round on him and scream at him to shut the fuck up, and then very pleasantly answer the phone and assure the person on the other end that yes the freight is being loaded on a trailer now and will be leaving within twenty minutes. we hang up, some minor jokes are made about how pleasant i am on the phone as opposed to in person. it’s true so i don’t really care. whatever. the night goes on.

now, at this point. it’s getting late. ish. it’s only bout half way through my shift, but it’s getting on 8 o’clock at night and I’m supposed to clock out for lunch. but the driver who i’m supposed to be fixing things for has only just gotten back to the terminal and i know that if i punch out now, i’m going to get stuck fixing his stuff while i’m off the clock and... i’m not fucking doing that. fuck the policy. write me up. i do not care. so i decide not to punch out. i wait until exactly eight and tell the supervisor that i’m taking lunch late. i do not ask. i do not check if that is okay. i just tell him. late lunch. whatever

meanwhile, a different and more annoying driver comes back and his paperwork is somehow even more fucked up than the guy with the dead computer, and the guy with the fubar from earlier in the day. combined. but he gets his paperwork to me first, s now i’m stuck sorting his shit out. fucking 11 bills i had to enter manually into the system. 11. and i mean, it’s not terribly hard, or even completely terribly time consuming, but... it’s annoying.

so i’m fixing that, and the dead computer river comes back with his stuff, explains everything, leaves for the day. i wrap up the first driver’s fuck ups, set his paperwork aside. fix the dead computer guy’s paper work and enter his things into the system. set that aside. and then finally go on my lunch break. now mind you... it’s like... 8:40? my shift is supposed to be over at 10:30. i haven’t even really gotten through half of my regular job duties.

but whatever. through all of this i’m texting my best friend who’s grounded in Washington DC because of thunderstorms trying to figure out when i’m picking her up from the airport provided the plane ever actually takes off.

whatever. I eventually get through all the paperwork, and clear all the lists i have to clear in the system. but i stll have to scan everything in. by this point it is 11:00 I have just started scanning things. I’m in the middle of scanning things when that late delivery, and even later pick up that the driver ended up doing get back. at that point, i’m the only dock certified union worker in the building. so i have to strip it. thankfully only one skid, but still.

so i put the freight aside, go back in, back to scanning. the dick supe wants the driver to stay and move trailers around. it’s past 11. the driver has been here all fucking day. and then some. i’m like, should we tel him before he gets parked? supe agrees so i run outside to tell him driver can’t do it. he’s out of hours. it’s against the law. whatever. supe can deal with it. he’s the dick who wants it done anyway. (supe gave in because, yeah, LAW).

OH YEAH! i forgot. so while i was doing paperwork, back like 10:30 there abouts, i find out that the ass whit the 11 unentered bills didn’t give me his delivery receipts. mother fucker took them home with him. i checked his truck just to be sure. I had to call the guy 3 times before he answered his fucking phone (yeah, you can bet your ass that i called him. i’m sorry, if’ you’re going to fuck me over with 11 unentered bills and then forget to give me half your paperwork on top of that, i’m waking your ass up. especially if you don’t have voicemail set up)

but whatever. i’m going through, i’m scanning. dick supe accidentally loads that skid from the late pickup onto an outbound manifest. he tells me to break the seal on the trailer and put that skid in since the trailer hasn’t left yet. so i drop what im doing, go open the trailer. full to the tail. go get supe, show him, he groans and has me close it back up. i go back inside and the supe ask me if i had already sealed the trailer. uh, yeah. duh. did you think i was going to come back in without sealing it?

whatever. so I go back to my scanning and the fucking morning crew starts coming in. it is after midnight and i am still scanning. ugh.

oh yes, and for the real kicker. the maintenance/service/repair people came to try to fix our AC unit that’ been on the fritz for like an entire month and said that it was overheating and shut it off early in the afternoon. so the building jumped from like 78 degrees to 88 degrees of hot, muggy bullshit. so that did not help me keep a cool head in any sense of the word.

anyway, i’m done venting now. it was just overall a very frustrating day and i’m so glad that it’s over and i’m home and showered. still waiting to see when i have to pick my best friend up from the airport, but... it’ll all work out in the end

#ignore me #bitching #ranting #i was so angry today #i still kinda am #but i'm too tired to maintain it

0 notes

letters-iwillnevergiveyou · 5 years

Text

New Years Eve Bulls7$*t

Dec. 31 2018

So you did the unthinkable, the unimaginable. You actually left me on New Years Eve at home by myself. I knew there was a big possibility this would happen. You said you had business to take care of but after I asked you not to leave me alone on New Years you ended up telling me you were staying home because I couldn't go with you to take care of this business. I don't understand you. You always tell me that but then I find out you pick up D.J. and she goes all over with you. So you leave me home alone constantly and take someone else with you, all while telling me you are alone. And you wonder why I can't trust you. You also said you were alone yesterday and couldn't call me. Come to find out that too was a lie. D.J. was with you. You could have called me all along you just didn't.

Anyway getting off track. Tonight. We go to the post office to send off records I'm selling. My dead husbands records I might add. To help us fund this trip to Belize. You didn't get tracking numbers, or a receipt. I'm totally screwed. All these people are expecting a product and by a certain time. I'm already a month late because of you. You couldn't go back in and get the numbers because they closed. Then you take me to get food. Finally. I told you I was hungry at 12. It was after 6 by this time. Then we go home. You took your apartment key off the ring so I could get inside, telling me you were going to finish hooking up your stereo. I stupidly listened and believed you. After I went inside you took off. The only reason I knew is because I was using your mobile hotspot and when it disconnected I looked outside and you were gone. Now here I am with no phone, my boyfriend ditched me, my car that you have been using while yours has been broke down is now broke down, and I'm fucked again. How can you not see how fucked up this is? I should have taken your car and left you here to sit a couple days with no phone, no transportation and no money. I bet you wouldn't like it. What is wrong with you? How can you treat any human being like this let alone someone you supposedly love? I don't understand. I keep thinking maybe you just went up the street to your buddys house. Maybe you just needed a minute away. Maybe you will make sure to be back before midnight and kiss me, bring in the new year with me, the woman you love and want to do life with. But honestly, you don't do life with me now. You lead a triple life. There is the life you have with me. The one where I am like this secret. You talk a little, have sex with me, then immediately take a shower and off you go. You either stay in the bathroom on the phone or getting high, or you leave. There is the life of the drug dealer. You hang out with your friends and get high. You drive all over the place and do favors for people if there is money or drugs in it for you. Then there is the nice sweet man you pretend to be to the rest of the world. The man you tried to trick me into thinking you were. The one who says the right stuff and pretends to care about you and what you have been through. The guy who anticipates your needs and is there for you when you need him. He is a good dad and just misunderstood. He doesn't exist. He only exists in the 16 dating apps he is signed up in. You know the ones you told me were a "hobby" that you would give up when I told you it hurt me for you to talk to other women that way. Yeah those. I wonder if Sandy ever even cheated on you or if it was you that cheated. I have her number I should find out. Oh who cares I guess. It doesn't matter. You have hurt me more emotionally than I have ever been hurt in my life. I read an article online about signs that you are emotionally abused. Check it out. It's eerily familiar....

10 Brutal Signs Your Man Is An Emotionally Abusive Jerk

By Dr Annie Kaszina

How do you spot an emotional abuser? Most likely when a guy first comes a-wooing, he won’t be carrying his, “I’m an emotionally abusive man” placard. So how do you identify him before you get hurt?

Here are the tell tale signs that he is an emotionally abusive man:

1. He shows a lack of respect. Not all emotionally abusive men will show you a lack of respect from Day 1. Some will turn on the charm for a while — others won’t. But how do they behave toward other people and speak about them? If your boyfriend is critical or contemptuous of other people, be very aware that you have a short shelf life before you become those other people.

2. He always tells incredible hard luck stories about his past. Every emotionally abuser worth his salt has a great hard luck story about his tough past — and, boy, does he tell it well. Telling you his hard luck story is a neat ploy. You only have to respond like the uber-caring, empathic, trusting person you are for him to know you are his perfect… prey.

3. You notice worrying back stories about women. Yep, he’s the one who’s suffered at the hands of women who didn’t understand nor appreciate him. He’s been let down, treated badly, exploited, and robbed blind by past wives and/or girlfriends. His bitterness about these predatory b**ches sends a clear message about how he wants you to behave: no demands, no expectations, just 100% commitment to healing his hurts.

4. He has a bad behavior — or three — that needs to be fixed. That could include drug taking, alcohol abuse, leering at women, tight-fistedness, or anger issues. He’s a little bit broken, but hey, your middle name is Ms. Fix-Him.

5. He’s domineering, and/or jealous, controlling and self-centered. You can tell yourself he’s just “being a man,” but the reality is that he is establishing a power (im)balance in the relationship. It works on the principle that he has the lion’s share of the power, and you get the lion’s share of responsibility.

6. He gets star billing in the relationship — with all that, that entails — while you get to play the bit parts. He gets most of the airplay, and the limelight, etc. as befits the star. It won’t be too long before he lets you know that your job is to keep his trailer nice and tidy.

7. He has a short fuse. “Slow to anger,” “quick to forgive and forget,” and willing to own up to his own mistakes, are NOT accurate descriptions of him. He’s easily upset, he overreacts, and as he tells it, the problem was not of his making in the first place — so, he rarely has to get his head around the “S” word (that’s “SORRY” to you and me). He may well be a “potty mouth.” He certainly doesn’t react in a measured, adult way when he feels peeved and aggrieved.

8. He’s not 100 percent reliable, consistent or predictable. “Something comes up” or he’s feeling too tired or he’s been really, really busy. Showing consideration for you, your wishes, and your feelings is not his top priority.

9. He doesn’t let you have boundaries. He asks inappropriate personal questions early on. He rushes you and the relationship. He sets himself up as the authority on every area of your life — including family, friends, your working life, and even your finances.

10. He sets off warning bells in your gut. There was that moment right at the start when, from somewhere deep inside you, there bubbled up the awareness: “YUK. This guy is bad news.” Sadly, that feeling didn’t come with a 20-page PDF report, a government health warning, or even banner headlines anywhere you looked. So what did you? You ignored that feeling. “Listen, if it can’t give me a chapter and verse, why should I pay attention to it? It’s making a lot less noise than he does. Besides, he might be my last chance at happiness, right?” Your intuition doesn’t obsess about the past, or worry about the future. It simply comes to the right conclusion in the present moment. Its predictions are far more clear-sighted than yours are.

If you want to keep yourself safe from emotionally abusive men, you have to learn how to spot them. Emotionally abusive partners create massive mental, emotional and financial havoc in their victims’ lives. This article is here to spare you heartache and disappointment. Don’t be too blind to see them.

.............................................................................Wow. All I can say is wow. So lets break it down.

1. Lack of respect. I don't think I have ever seen you show anyone respect except when you talk about Charlie. Which comes from abuse of your own as a child.

2. Tells hard luck stories. Oh my god I won't even go there. You have a poor woe is me story to excuse every bad behavior.

3. Worrying back stories about other women. Yep! Helloo! The most horrible stories about the women from your past.

4. Bad behavior. Do I even need to go there?

I'll use short answers. Lying, cheating, manipulating, drugs, etc. etc. etc.

5. Domineering and/or jealous controlling and self centered. 150% yes yes yes. You make it very clear you are the boss. All these rules for me that just don't apply to you.

6. Star billing in the relationship. Umm ya. It's all about you. Always is.

7. Easily upset, overreacts, doesn't take responsibility. You get mad at me when I simply tell you how I feel. Or how your actions hurt me. You never apologize. You don't ever take responsibility. It's always someone elses fault or my fault. You will do something fucked up to me and it somehow is my fault. Every fucking time.

8. Not 100% reliable consistent or predictable. This is you. I never know what you are going to do. Even when you try to do better it might only last a day, a week, a month maybe an hour even. Point is, I never know what you are going to do. And you don't show you care about my feelings or needs no matter how clear I relay them to you. I am last on your priority list if I'm there at all. i.e. TONIGHT FOR EXAMPLE

9. The first part of this one eh not so much but the part about you being the authority on every area of my life is spot on. You don't let me have boundaries. You will tell off my entire family if you don't agree with them and my relationship with them. I have ostracized my entire support system because of you. I had it pretty good. My mother in law and I had a great relationship, so did me and my mom and sister. Now I have no one but you. Thanks for that.

10. Sets off warning bells in my gut. Yes, you did. From the very beginning. There was just something always nagging at me telling me you were full of shit. Like how anytime you did something shitty and I would try to talk to you about it, before I could say anything you would distract me by telling me something I wanted to hear. In fact the night you told me you were falling in love with me was one of those times. I was mad at you and said we needed to talk. I was about to tell you whats what when you blurt out you're falling in love with me and that i intimidated you and you didn't know how to act around me. Very fucking smooth.

So there you have it. I am officially the victim of emotional abuse. I never thought I would ever again be in a position to be abused ever again. Yet here I am. The stupid part is that if you were truly remorseful and made an effort I would stay. I would try to make this work. But who am I kidding? You don't love me and I'm not sure you are even capable of loving anyone. J---n lives to love and look after J---n. Ugh I'm fucking done with this entry. Worst New Years Eve I have ever fucking had. If you loved me you would want to be with me.

#alone tonight #new years eve #liar #shitty boyfriend #drugs over me #im done

0 notes

hey-kids-want-some-avengers · 7 years

Note

1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17,18,19,20,21,22,23,24,25,26,27,28,29,30,31,32,33,34,35,36,37,38,39,40,41,42,43,44,45,46,47,48,49,50,51,52,53,54,55,56,57,58,59,60,61,62,63,64,65,66,67,68,69,70,71,72,73,74,75,76,77,78,79,80,81,82,83,84,85,86,87,88,89,90,91,92,93,94,95,96,97,98,99,100 (lol, I'm sorry)

Holy mother of- alright, I did this to myself. Answers are below the cut!

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? More cereal! I’m hella lactose intolerant so I rarely even have milk.

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? Sometimes, it depends if I was already too cold or not.

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? Usually I use drawings or a bit of cardboard.

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? I take my tea with a little honey and my coffee with lots of flavored creamer.

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? VERY MUCH YES

6: do you keep plants? Cacti mostly:)

7: do you name your plants? YEP

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? Pencil or acrylic, though I’m digging clay now.

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? I spend almost every hour of every day singing, it’s one of my absolute favorite things!

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? back or side depending on how my jaw is doing.

11: what's an inner joke you have with your friends? OH GoD, so many...

12: what's your favorite planet? Mars >3

13: what's something that made you smile today? I got to spend all day with my pupper AND I got called for an interview tomorrow.

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? Brick walls, lots of floor space for art, ect. a window seat, high ceilings and a cozy atmosphere please and thank you.

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! 99% of our solar systems mass is the sun. :3

16: what's your favorite pasta dish? Baked Penne!

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? It’s already blue but I wanna do it red, orange and yellow at some point for a crazy fire look.

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. The time I jumped off the lid to my friends hot tub and hit my head, knocking myself unconscious and almost dying.

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? Kinda, it’s mostly art and random facts??

20: what's your favorite eye color? Blue

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that's been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. My art bag that looks like a freaking paint towel at this point.

22: are you a morning person? Ye!

23: what's your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? Write, draw, take a bath and bake.

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? Yes, my bestfren Chloe -w-

25: what's the weirdest place you've ever broken into? An abandoned house down the block while chasing a cat. There was some guy sleeping in there.

26: what are the shoes you've had for forever and wear with every single outfit? My red Converse!

27: what's your favorite bubblegum flavor? Wintergreen

28: sunrise or sunset? Sunset, for sure.

29: what's something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? She blushes in her ears and gets really shy around guys.

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? Umm, yes. When my mom had emergency surgery.

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. OKAY, I LIKE SOCKS, I WEAR EM ALL THE TIME AND THEY NEVER MATCH. BOOM.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. I went to down my iced tea and found out too late that it was my dads whiskey and I got drunk off my ass.

33: what's your fave pastry? oooh, I love pastries with all my heart, probably lemon bars.

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? It’s in my room somewhere, a little weasel puppet named “wonder weasel” and I made him a mask.

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? Yes, I keep at least one on me at all times.

36: which band's sound would fit your mood right now? Panic!

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? I reaaaaally like it clean but it never happens. I’m a pig.

38: tell us about your pet peeves! I hate when people never show up on time, ignore me when I’m talking to check their phones and I hate when people pretend to like me.

39: what color do you wear the most? Black

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what's it's story? does it have any meaning to you? It’s a bumble bee necklace my sister got me and I love it.

41: what's the last book you remember really, really loving? The book thief.

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! It’s a local place here and they make really pretty pastries and coffee, it’s very modern inside but it’s cozy and everyone’s super nice. It smells like autumn leaves and spices.

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? myself???

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? Last week in a bath tbh

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? Yes and no? It kinda depends but I usually second guess myself.

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. I changed my ipods name to titanic. It’s syncing now. (I hate myself)

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? LETTUCE

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? Burning alive, and it kinda is kinda isn’t still.

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? I like to but I never have money, the last one was a panic! at the disco cd.

50: what's an odd thing you collect? Fish????? I have five tanks in my room ok????

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? Can’t help falling in love with you and phantom of the opera (my gf) IM CHEESEY

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? THEY ALL SUCK

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? I’ve seen all but pulp fiction and I adore them all, beetlejuice is one of my favorite movies.

54: who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? Besides myself idk

55: what's the most dramatic thing you've ever done to prove a point? I don’t even know honestly.

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? Their sense of humor, laugh and comfortableness.

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? Doesn’t it always?!

58: who's the wine mom and who's the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? My friend hates wine but is totally the wine mom, sooo that makes me the vodka aunt bc I only have one friend.

59: what's your favorite myth? Icarus

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? YES! I love the raven, tyger and the tell tale heart??

61: what's the stupidest gift you've ever given? the stupidest one you've ever received? Socks for received I guess? Probably the dumbest thing I’ve given was a dirty shirt to my friend????

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? Almost always, grape or orange usually.

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? I’m really particular about them and I don’t let anyone touch em.

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? Ink black.

65: is there anyone you haven't seen in a long time who you'd love to hang out with? My gf..; ;

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? Seashells, blue flowers and tiny pink ones, probably a lil glitter.

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? They feel relaxing to me.

68: what's winter like where you live? ITS LIKE A NEVER ENDING HELLL

69: what are your favorite board games? Fury of Dracula, d&d, ect.

70: have you ever used a ouija board? Yep! I own one.

71: what's your favorite kind of tea? cranberry??

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it? YES. My ADHD is scary bad ok.

73: what are some of your worst habits? Not eating healthily/not drinking enough, secluding myself.

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. Humorous, kind and caring and wonderful and supporting. The most fantastic person to live.

75: tell us about your pets! OK!!!!!! I have three cats, a tabby (ponyo), a massive grey one(rory) and a smol floofy white and black one(lydia). I have four betta fish, Lafayette, Remus, Pietro, and Marvel. I have 12 guppy/platty and I could list their names but I wontttt, and my sweet pupper girl, Matilda

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren't? Writing requests..............

77: pink or yellow lemonade? Pink.

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? HATE

79: what's one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? My girlfriend sent me chocolates and my fren bought me a bee pillow, they’re pretty great.

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? Light purple and I didn’t choose them, my mom painted that room before she got sick so I kept it.

81: describe one of your friend's eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. Deep sand washing over dark beaches and charcoal mixed in a vat of dark clay.

82: are/were you good in school? No, not really. I listened tho

83: what's some of your favorite album art? Pretty odd, believers never die, infinity on high

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? I have two right now and I have MANY more planned.

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? OF COURSE, CAPTAIN AMERICA AND DEADPOOL, SANDMAN EVEN THO THAT DON’T REALLY COUNT.

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? um? Nirvana? Am I doing this right?

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? Perks of being a wall flower, three idiots.

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? All of them??

89: are you close to your parents? I like to think so

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. Ohhh um, I dunno, probably Denver?? I’m really isolated.

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? I’m going to Denver for a concert and a huge road trip to California this summer to see my family.

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? It GoN DRoWN SOn

93: what's the hairstyle you wear the most? Down. It’s too short for anything.

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? My grandpa

95: what are your plans for this weekend? Hanging with my fren and watching shameless.

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? Sadly, I put them off until it does it automatically. I regret it every time.

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? Advocate, Taurus, hufflepuff!

98: when's the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? Yesterday and I loved it.

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. Hamilton tbh, think of me, riptide and I found.

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? Five years into the past because I’m not fucking ready to grow up.

0 notes