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findafight · 1 year

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Hope you're okay with my stray starbara thoughts bc oh my god you've given me brainworms like no other!!!

They're getting serious and telling each other things that they've never told anyone else before. Barb tells Steve that she worries that Nancy is outgrowing her and their friendship is slowly dissolving. She felt it before but it's worse now after the Upside Down and Nancy is charging her way through the journalism world. And she doesn't know what to do. Steve tells her that he does all these things to impress his father but he's not sure if he likes the man he's becoming. Especially since sometimes he's not sure if his dad even loves him. He sure as shit doesn't love his mother what with all the cheating his dad does. He talks about how lonely he gets in that big empty house by himself and she talks about the stares she gets now that she's Poor Barbara Holland who got sick from a gas leak and got lost in the woods.

Steve invites Barb around to use the pool. He talks about how the water will be good for her physical therapy - and while he's not technically wrong it slowly dissolves into them goofing off, splashing each other, and kissing in the pool loungers. She doesn't feel as self conscious with Steve there with her being supportive the whole time.

The first time he lends her his letterman jacket she rolls her eyes at what a fucking move that was Harrington, oh my god. But she blushes and wears the jacket and Steve smiles and looks so happy and smiley he's practically dizzy with it.

He tells her his hair care secrets and she promises not to tell anyone. Barb lets him do her hair for her one time and it comes out so soft and looks so good and she really likes the feeling of his nails gently scratching against her scalp. She knits him a scarf , and it comes out a little wonky with a couple of missed stitches, and all she can see are the imperfections, but Steve loves it and wears it all winter.

He gets his summer job working at Scoops and he hates his dad for forcing him into it but Robin seems cool - if a bit standoffish to him at the moment. The first time Barb comes by to visit while he's on the clock he pulls out the "set sail on an ocean of flavour with me" speech and it's so lame and so dorky but Barb leans over the counter to kiss him on the cheek when he gets her a free cone.

She gets nightmares of the Upside Down still - though they're not as frequent anymore - and they're horrible but if Steve's there he'll hold her close so she can feel his warmth, and his heartbeat, and he'll run his hand along her back until she feels safe again. She returns the favour after the mall burns down and he dreams of being tortured. Of almost dying. Of being drugged and out of control of himself while others were in danger. She holds him this time and reminds him that he's not alone, and he's safe.

idk they're in love!!

I am not only fine with it, I encourage it!!! Send me so many Starbara thoughts! Brainworms forever!!

yes yes them slowly opening up to each other, being soft together!! How Steve doesn't know what he wants from the future, how Barb feels Nancy pulling away (even though it's Barb who got the shiny, new, popular boyfriend) and how she feels she did the same thing to Robin, way back when. How Barb's parents mean well but they're suffocating in their over-protectiveness and she can't even properly talk to them about what she went through. How Steve doesn't want to become his Father, and how especially doesn't want to become his mother, how he thinks he might not be doomed to it when he's with Barb.

She tells him about the Upside Down, how cold and dark it was and how scared she had been. About the nightmares where it feels like she'll never be warm or able to breathe easily again. How sometimes she can't sleep until she's called the Byers and made sure Will is alright and how sometimes she gets a call from him in the middle of the night doing the same. She tells Steve that some days, he's the only thing about her life that she feels she chose. When her parents were pleased she wasn't distracted by boys, she chose Steve; when Nancy was a bit surprised(though encouraging) at how excited Barb was for the party, she chose Steve; after everything, when the world had tipped right-side up but she was surrounded by doctors and government agents and confusion, Barb chose Steve; how she wants to keep choosing him. (Steve holds her tight, right then. Kisses her forehead as she buries her face in his neck and tells her that he's here, she's safe, it's over. Doesn't tell her quite yet that he's pretty sure she's the first person to choose to love him.)

They float in his pool, no bad memories in it, no last-seen pictures of a girl dangling her legs over the side. Just them, chatting and splashing and laughing and kissing. Feeling like the teenagers they're supposed to be. When he first suggested it she joked that he's just making excuses to see her in her swim suit, and it's a bit self deprecating, because why would he? but Steve just smirked, shrugged, obviously dragged his eyes up and down her body, and said "it worked, didn't it?"

They get looks when he pulls Cliche Boyfriend Stunts and how openly gone on her he is. @jestyzestyn on the first post pointed out that beauty standards and 80's tropes played into the original Nacy-Barb-Steve dynamic. So not only is she Poor Barbara Holland, she's also a not conventionally Pretty Girl going out with thee most desirable boy at school. There's whispers that Steve feels sorry for her--guilty, after she went missing from his house. Once, someone asked why he was with the girl who got poisoned by the gas leak, and he gave them such a scathing look that no one asked again. (the answer is, of course, that he loves her. She makes him feel safe, and loved, and that there's more to life than their dinky hometown.)

She teases that maybe since she has his junior varsity jacket, she'll have to make him a sweater one of these days. (And she knows about the Curse, how making a boyfriend a sweater will inevitably lead to a breakup. but what is the time and effort of knitting a sweater to finding out monsters exist and fighting one, on the off chance it'll help save her? probably even, she thinks.) He says she better make sure it matches his scarf.

Okay lighter side, Steve lifeguarded the summer of '84, and this is prime time for girlfriend to ogling him. But it is also prime people-who-are-not-your-gf-ogling-you-time. Barb is like Steve. those girls were flirting with you. If they wanted an actual pool noodle they would have gone to the office the first time you told them to. and he does his confused puppy head tilt going "why would they do that? everybody knows I'm dating you?" and she doesn't know if she needs to explain the concept of trying to steal someone's man and also that he's hot to him or not. She's like babe.....ok. (there was some jealousy at first but tbh after a guy has told you he loves you and told you how much his parents infidelity bothers him and also literally fought a monster to save you [she isn't letting that one go. nancy makes sense. Nancy is her best friend and is like a dog with a bone for mysteries. Jonathan also makes sense. His brother was missing too. She had been seeing Steve barely a month before everything. who DOES that? Steve. Steve does.] you kinda grow secure in your relationship)

(in the fall, after they get to the tunnels, Steve gives her an out. looking at her through his goggles. He tells her she doesn't have to go back down there, doesn't have to touch the Upside Down again, but she clenches her jaw and tells him that he's concussed and there's no way she's letting him go down alone.)

but oof. lifeguarding you can't get distracted so even tho Barb gets to ogle hot bf steve is a professional and does not get to ogle hot gf the same :( '85 is when they really get their flirt on during company time. He tries on the outfit and shows her at home and he's like "this is literally the worst day of my life. this is horrible."

and she goes "well, hon. at least it makes your butt look good?"

and Steve huffs and crosses his arms over his chest and says "my butt makes everything look good. Let's not give any credit to the sailor suit."

"okay okay."

And every time she comes in he does the "ocean of flavour" spiel and she's dying. he's soooo lame. she loves him so much. she kisses him every time about it.

Robin is a bit cold and standoffish because steve is not only the guy who never paid attention to Tammy Thompson, he's also the guy currently dating Robin's childhood best friend who sort of ditched her. It's many messy feelings inside our girl. But Barb does try to make amends with Robin, and they do rekindle their friendship (and gang up on Steve)(literally I think it'd be so funny if Steve wanted to be Robin's friend sooo bad. world's most giant squish on her. sooo embarrassing. And Brab is playfully like oooh do you have a cruuush on Robin? and steve is like absolutely not I am in love with YOU i just want Robin to live next door and also share cat custody what's not to get?)

When Dustin comes back, talking about Suzie, he looks right at Steve, starry-eyed, and says "she my Barb." hkadsjhfkashd

After the Russian base Barb spends a lot of nights in bed with two other people, shaking them out of nightmares she doesn't want to comprehend, not really knowing what to do but loving them anyways.

#starbara #hollington #steve harrington #barbara holland #barb holland #stranger things #stranger things au #findaanswers #momotonescreaming #steve x barb #i took so long to write this i watched the entirety of Titanic while trying to write it lmao #should i tag the stobin that i compulsively insert into everything? i think i will #stobin #finda writes stuff #barb making fun of the loud sigh steve lets out whenever dustin annoys him #them telepathically communicating because theyve been together long enough to just KNOW #sorry i forgot a readmore at first!!

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