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mattatouile · 11 months

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It's Pride Month so let me tell you about my journey with my sexuality, and what a supportive family can mean:

I grew up in the EXTREMELY RURAL Bible Belt/gulf coast of the United States. My parents sort of ...nominally took us to Baptist Church until I was about 8.

However, despite being homeschooled in the woods and briefly being church people, my parents were not bigots. When I was six, I asked my mom if Elton John was married to Kiki Dee because I saw their music video together and my mom sort of took a breath and said that some boys want to marry and kiss other boys instead of girls, and that's what gay meant. And Friends introduced me to lesbianism so like, I kind of got it early on. I shrugged and said okay. This was 1994.

I spent 25 years of my life thinking that my fascination/affection for breasts and desire to maybe make out with other girls was just what ALL girls were like. Why would you not want to kiss other girls????? Baffling. But my default was still heterosexuality. I am very femme presenting. I enjoy a lot of stereotypical hetero things. Had a crush on my karate sensei (he was BEAUTIFUL and GOOFY and KIND) and then I had like five years of emotional fluffing with a queer man which was a mess in retrospect.

And then. I moved out of Louisiana.

I met someone (a bad idea woman, but a woman) and had my first torrid and horrible relationship. But that's fine. She introduced my wife. She's the reason I came out to myself and my parents.

My mom was concerned. For reasons that weren't really my sexuality, but which I read that way for a while and it hurt but I knew it wasn't personal it was just a shock. She didn't argue or convince me, she just didn't send me a rainbow cake immediately. And she wanted to be the one to tell my father who was working overseas, and wanted to wait for him to be home to do it.

His response? "Yeah, that checks out." 😂😂🥹 After that she was chill as could be. Idk I guess she psyched herself out about my dad of all people.

He almost immediately bought rainbow Crocs to wear around at his job to support his gay daughter.

My siblings all responded with a shade of either "didn't you always say you wanted to make out with Scully?" Or "huh, I thought it would be [my younger sister]."

I choose the label of lesbian for myself right now, because it's easier than "wlw who sometimes I like the looks of a guy but would rather have a colonoscopy than a conversation with him."

Do I have some trauma from being told I was disgusting just for supporting queer rights in my hometown? Probably.

I guess the point of this is, it wasn't even easy for me to come out, and I KNEW my parents would be totally fine with it. I cannot imagine how long it would've taken me to get to that point without a supportive family and open household. Like I really might've just been the spinster aunt who was "too picky" instead of being happily married to my wife. She's the best. My family is the best. My stepkid's are queer as hell, and we've done everything in our power to make sure they know any identity will be respected and supported and our families have joined us in that.

It's not hard, y'all. And I'm so sorry for everyone who is not treated this way. I love you. My parents love you. My mother would give you the biggest hug and a delicious meal. My dad would do that thing where he rubs his big toes together and tries not to cry because it hurts him that people have to live without support and love. You would be welcome in our home and hopefully shown what family should be.

I hope every single queer person on this site finds family. Family isn't blood. Family is safety. Family is support. Family is knowing that you are cared for, no matter your identity, who you love, etc.

Happy Pride everyone. And if it's not a Happy Pride for you yet, I hope some day you get to know that joy.

#happy pride #pride month #queer

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collecting--stardust · 5 months

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random (very weird - sorry for that) question: think of the motogp grid (2023 or 2024), pls sort the grid in "cat vibes" and "dog vibes" (not related to the pet the rider has; more like personality vibes), which riders have dog vibes and which riders have cat vibes ? like, for me Bez has the ultimative dog vibes, while Marc has cat vibes (and i can't explain why) 😂💕

Hello Mira 🫶🏻 It's not a weird question and really interesting actually! It got me thinking and while I do face some difficulties on some riders, here's my take:

dog vibes:

- raul (I mean look at him! No explanation needed.)

- alex marquez (idk he always gives off huge puppy vibes kinda like a husky?)

- alex rins (actually he reminds me of a cat too but I think he's slightly gives off more of dog vibes)

- enea (sometimes he gives off 'cat sleeping in random sun spots' vibes to me but after I saw his dog hagrid I was like ah, yeah that makes sense he does gives off dog vibes I'm just blind to it lol)

- aleix (he reminds me of a dobermann)

- bez (literally the epitome of dog vibes)

- augusto (if aleix is a dobermann then augusto will be great dane)

- martin (like rins, I am stuck between cat or dog vibes but yeah I think he falls onto the dog vibes category more)

- taka (he gives off black cat vibes sometimes but overall vibes he's more to dog vibes to me)

- zarco (idk much about him but he certainly is not cat vibes)

- miller (same reason as zarco)

cat vibes:

- miguel (he gives off fancy cat vibes like persian cats)

- fabio q (idk he sure has the dog vibes going on but I think he's like a maine coon and I dont even know why)

- franky (black cat personified)

- pecco (come on there's no way he's a dog vibes person)

- maverick (he's unpredictable to me so really cat-like)

- marc (to me he's a ragdoll cat and I don't take any criticism)

- mir (idk he really reminds me of that cat in the ghibli movie kiki's delivery service)

- pol (idk much about pol but from the clips and videos I've seen of him he gives off cat vibes to me)

- brad (another rider that idk much about but he gives off the opposite vibes from darryn which is 100% dog vibes so I assumed he's a cat vibes type of guy)

- diggia (he reminds me of a Scottish fold lol)

- luca (he's a tough one. I spent too long because he looks exactly like his cute poodles but I think personality wise he's more of a cat. A calm one, but can be mischievous at times.)

- pedro (listen. this guy reminds me of a squirrel for some reason so this is extremely tough for me but after a long time thinking, I have come to the conclusion that he seems like a siamese cat too so yeah.)

I don't know if it's accurate or not but it's just my opinion. Thanks a lot Mira 🩷

#while thinking about acosta i suddenly reminded of deniz and that guy is 100% a ginger cat lmao #i mostly just go on with vibes and from observing random stuffs about them since for some riders i really dk much about them #tbh brad can be a dog vibes person too since he has such big balls during racing #but from what I've seen of him outside of racing hes really soft spoken and calm so yeah #that was tough lmao but i had so much fun <3 #la réponse 💗

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chryblossomjjk · 1 year

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You said diary, so I'm here to deliver

TMI WARNING (lol):

Fortunately, I never did the nasty with him (the thought is 🤢). Only went as far as the back seat canoodling (is that how u spell?) bc even tho I had no standards, I knew my limits. He sucked at kissing tho and his nostrils were so big that his fucking snot got into my mouth 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. His kissing skills were extra disappointing bc he was my first kiss, and my dreams were shattered bc I thought kissing was gonna be boring for the rest of my life.

While i wasn't dating him at the time (15 y/o me was depressed and insecure 🙁), he was my first boyfriend technically (only when he wasn't cheating on me 😉🙄). So, I guess you could say the whole dating experience was ass.

Man's made me very sad and took advantage of the fact that I was so hung up on him to have the chance to get off. However, he was ass at that, too. I'm pretty sure the dude had a death grip on himself whenever he watched porn bc he'd always suggest we "finish at home," as in by ourselves 🤨🤡.

Turns out he was still ass later bc his ex-girlfriend came to tell me all the tea when they broke up.

Also unfortunate, but he was so a part of my friend group bc me and my friends were immature. BUT, this gave me plenty of opportunity to roast his fragile masculinity as much as I wanted. He was gonna pay for my therapy and emotional trauma somehow 🤷‍♀️😂.

Sadly, I tried to date another emotionally and physically stunted guy after that, which ended before it started (I could go on about him, too ugh).

On a happier note, i haven't dated since, and while sometimes I feel like I'm missing out, I know that I need to have a great relationship with myself first. I'm really finding myself even though the past 4 years have been hard, and it has been and will continue to be worth it 🥰

But fuck, I miss kissing and cuddling 🫠🥺.

Thanks for letting me rant, most darling Kiki. I 💖 you.

im so sorry my love! honestly, it's kinda nutty to see how that first person you're really into heavily influences the way you feel about yourself, relationships, etc. i'm so sorry your first experience with love was traumatic and i'm so glad to hear that you're healing <3

and unfortuantely its all trial and error and sometimes you find another dud like you did the sceond time. however, you were able to spot the red flags asap n gtfo of there!! v proud of you for that like thats not an easy thing to do!

i really hope when you're ready, you find a love that is kind, sympathetic, and easy, bc you deserve it :( <3

#ask #men are trash

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