today is my last exam and after it I'll buy an ice cream and I'm so excited for that to happen oml😵‍💫🍨💞

Sunday 15 April 1832: SH:7/ML/E/15/0052

8 5

12 ¾

-  Let[ter] fr[om] L[ad]y St[uar]t inclos[in]g     half sheets fr[om] Mrs. Hamilt[o]n to L[ad]y S- [Stuart] de R- [Rothesay] and let[ter] fr[om] L[ad]y G- [Gordon] 1 half sh[ee]t full - fine morn[in]g F[ahrenheit] 61° at 9 1/2 in my r[oo]m and 67° at 9 3/4 in the balc[on]y - Mr. West preach[e]d 33 min[ute]s fr[om] 1 Tim[oth]y 1.15 - queer Evangel[ica]l serm[o]n awake all the time w[e]nt out at 1 1/2 for 1 1/2 h[ou]r - met Captain Cameron she asked him to dinner the murder is out  we talked it over she will not say no so ‘tis done ca[me] to my r[oo]m soon aft[e]r 4 - wr[ote] the foll[owin]g to L[ad]y S- [Stuart] ‘Hast[in]gs Sun[day] 15 Ap[ril] 1832. Th[an]k you ver[y] m[u]ch my d[eare]st L[ad]y St[uar]t, for all y[ou]r k[i]nd anx[iet]y ab[ou]t me, and for Mrs. Hamilton’s excell[en]t let[ter] - we will talk ab[ou]t all this - I shall n[o]t fix an[y]th[in]g till my arriv[a]l in Lond[on] - I fear there is no chance of my see[in]g L[ad]y St[uar]t de Rothesay - I h[a]d a let[ter] fr[om] L[ad]y Gordon this morn[in]g who is alarm[e]d already - I kno[w] n[o]th wheth[e]r Vere will, or can for fear of overweight, wr[Ite] at all today - poor dear girl! I really feel for and pity her excessive shyness and incredulity   on going out to take our little walk we un expectedly met a friend whom between ourselves I rather coutned upon seeing again rather sooner at last poor Vere has found herself almost forced into entering upon the subject with me and I have really thought it right   assured as I am of your approbation to express my gladness to see our friend who is to dine with us this evening   as I find he stays tomorrow I conclude he will call in the morning  when it will be so natural for me to be out that even Vere’s fastidiousness can find not fault  the mere being asked to dinner might be taken as enough  I hope and think it will       we ha[ve] h[a]d a good deal of n[or]th east wind till today; b[u]t Vere h[a]s borne it bet[ter] then I expect[e]d; and I am in bet[ter] sp[iri]ts ab[ou]t h[e]r than I w[a]s - ever, dear[e]st L[ad]y St[uar]t, ver[y] affect[ionatel]y y[ou]rs A. [Anne] Lister’ at 5 20/: took d[o]wn my no[te] 3 p[ages] of 1/4 sh[ee]t to ‘the Hon[oura]ble Lady St[uar]t Whitehall’ to Miss H- [Hobart] to enclose w[i]th Mrs. Hamilton’s let[ter] to L[ad]y S- [Stuart] twenty minutes with Miss H- [Hobart] laughing and joking but found the tears sstarting as I kissed her forehad and ran away   what are you going said she but I was off

saying oh I dare not look behind me     a few tears are falling but away with them ‘For hum[a]n weal

heav[e]n husb[a]nds all events’   I am satisfied  I can keep uo the friendship try to arrange  with Lady Gordon and be better off than with Miss H- [Hobart] ‘tis strik[in]g 6 - dress[e]d - din[ner] at 6 3/4 - on going down saw them on the sofa to[ge]ther and both looking so satisfied I suspected how it was  the moment we left the dining room about eight he staying behind  quarter hour she told me it was all over he made his offer

in a very flattering manner to her done it very well and she had accepted him I said it was much better I was very glad of it she gave me her two cheeks to kiss  I kisse[d] the first one then the other but said nothing   she morelized a little said how a moment changed our whole  lives but she thought she should not repent  he stays tomorrow I asked if he would dine with us yes she did not care now what was ssaid I gently suggested that it would be more consistent with her former  primminess to tell him that now they could not mistake each other she thought he had better not dine here two days together  they could see more of each other at the Lodge  and perhaps he would not be the less pleased with  her for this  I was not prudish but now perhaps I even felt more particular than she did   she seemed satisfied with what I said said Italy had already been mentioned for the winter he came in   we soon had coffee I poured it out ordered tea in half an hour and soon came upstairs   a little before nine  and left them to their happiness  what a sudden change for us alll  for me too she will go to Italy but not with me  well tho’ I made my eyes very yed [red] with crying before dinner I already begin to think it is better she would  have left me in the lurch when I could have managed less well than now odd enough we had scarcely  gone out to the house this afternoon when we a long small man at a distance before us and she said  how very far that man’s arms are for his ssides (one saw the light between the uper arm and side)  I don’t like that  when who should it be but Captain Cameron   he shook hands with us both we walked  up High street and past the nursery garden and then took several turns in the croft  I thought she walked up and down very satisfiedly  in returning along George street I heard her ask him if he would eat his mutton chop with us  ‘I shall be very glad to see you’ ‘will you really’ said he in a low voice  oh oh thought I then it’s all over  and we talked it over on our return  she owned that aunt and she had agreed it  would be very foolish to refuse him but still she refused to believe he really would offer till he had absoultely  done it  she will soon be sufficiently in love   well my prospects are changed  it was only this morning at  

 SH:7/ML/E/15/0053

breakfast I had spoken of my father and mother as having been unhappy together  an ill assorted match and spoke of Marian as   if I wanted to make a thing better always pulling it down again  she liked to everybody be cock of the dunghill etc etc in fact I have gradually of late become more confidential luckily I have never told her my fortune or income and on the whole said nothing I am very sorry for  I do not feel uncomfortably committed tho’ I did laugh and say befor[e] church this morning  well if it was not for the petticoats the thing would be clear enough  yes that it would said she  perhaps ssaid I laughingly it is pretty much the same thing in spite of them (the petticoats)  how little dream what so few hours would bring forth while doubting of Captain C- [Cameron]  she liked to keep me within reach better have me than neither or nobody  le jeu vaut la chandelle  I am satisfied perhaps I shall do tolerably yet  at all rates I feel more comfortable after having  written the above - fr[om] 8 55/.. to 9 1/2 wr[ote] the last 33 lines in Miss H-‘s [Hobart] room my own full of smoke  w[e]nt d[o]wn to tea at 9 35/.. - talked away agreeably enough he staid till eleven and a quarter  she then ate an orange and when she had done it I asked for my orangeade  oh said she I had forgot it  I made no ob[servation]s but kept  up very well ca[me] upst[ai]rs at 11 1/2 and to my r[oo]m at 11 35/.. - kissed her forehead as usual and glad to be  off rang my bell immediately to get rid of Cameron and have no fear of interruption feeling  that I should make a fool of myself as ssoon as alone  why do I do it   she never cared for me well she even think for one moment of what I may or may not really feel on this occasion?  well flow on my useless miserable foolish tears  but they have flowed before perhaps  even more uncomfortably than now there is less mortification  the thing is at least  intelligible I shall get the better of it and at least be thankful that my fate is fixed  shall I see much of her hereafter or not   how odd will seem our meeting in Italy! but I shall be better then  how thankful I am this business did not happen sooner  I shall at least  escape the lovemaking  she says I behave beautifully she little guesses the misery of this tearful moment as I write but no more surely it will be over by morning  Finish mild sunless day - F[ahrenheit] 63° at 11 3/4 in my r[oo]m and 49 1/2° at 12 3/4 in the balc[on]y

Extra 2: Crowning

((This was the already planned extra, as like last year I wanted to actually write something to have to do with the crowning. I realize it’s late but I finished it at like 1:30 a.m. and wanted to actually sleep. Honestly pretty straightfoward in all sense. Like I said in the tags of the last one, not nearly as dark.))

“Esteemed guests of the 12th Perigee Ball, may I please have your attention for the moment I’m certain many of you have waited eons for!”

It took some time, but with the quieting of the band, so too did the crowd of trolls scattered throughout the ballroom. A flashy tealblood dressed poet’s shirt decorated in a teal, double breasted vest and ascot, pranced up to the stage. The faux feathers attached to the vest moved the barest bit, enough so no one watching them too close would make unfortunate presumptions about the construction of his suit. Zamiir Paradi, the host. Who else deserved to announce the prestigious winners?

The stage lights centered on him. He pulled a gold-adorned envelope out from his sleeve dramatically, flourishing it underneath the bright lights to give it a shimmer. A wide smile graced his face as he scanned the letter.

“It appears this sweep, our winners are the gorgeous model Ferroc Lutris and stunning Grubtube star Kinesa Mamono!”

The crowd exploded into uproarious applause before Zamiir had the chance to request it. They were celebrities, well-liked and even better-known. For them to win was only natural.

Still, a seadweller and brownblood hung against a wall, eyeing the winners graciously taking center stage suspiciously. The brownblood wore a short, loose bright red dress that draped around her knees with a black tie around the back holding the whole thing together. Mayola wore the same outfit. She’d gotten too attached to the dress.

“You know who they hell they are?” Valeba asked. She hated to admit she focused on such a frivolous crowning as much as she did, but after the events of the early morning she needed the distraction. If she focused too much on the world outside sanitized highblood life, she might go crazy.

“Uh...the tacky jade’s a model. Think I’ve heard Ace drop his name once or twice whenever she bitched about them. No idea about the other jade though. Guess she’s Internet famous? For whatever that’s worth.” Mayola shrugged helplessly. Valeba could tell Mayola was doing the same as her, trying so damn hard to ignore the stupid riots. “Then again, guess if she weren’t famous we wouldn’t be seein’ her here, huh?”

“Guess not.” She crossed her arms. Dontoc had told her all about last sweep, when two lowbloods won. She’d even drummed up some excitement to see it happen again. Oh well. Who knows, maybe the rebellions scared them.

The two watched silently as the whole crowning ceremony started up. No matter how much she focused, the only things returning to her vision was what she saw on the screen. Did they not know here? Or did they just not care?

Mayola glanced slyly over at Valeba. She must’ve been thinking the same thing. “Ya know...if we dip now, everyone’ll be too busy to notice royalty slip away.”

Those were the best words Valeba heard all night. “Oh God, yes.”

The two trolls accepted their crowns, both equally decorated in diamonds that sparkled underneath the lights. Zamiir managed to slide Kinesa’s on without much work, the two trolls being almost matched perfectly in height. Ferroc’s crown troubled them more. The jade ended up taking a kneel, dipping his head to let the host place it atop his head. It rested just above his horns. The two crowns weren’t identical, but they were close enough.

“Two jades, eh? Interesting. They even look matching, just like everyone else. Maybe I can get in and talk to them. Get an interview about why they think they won,” Gonzor said. Not a single piece of his attire from last night changed. He liked it. The colors looked good on him, he thought. They drove attention away from other, less Empire friendly aspects about himself. Not even his position much changed. He sat at the bar, away from all other trolls to observe the spectacle safely from a distance.

The bartender gave him a cold smile. “Good luck with that one. I’m sure once they realize who you are, any interest in drumming up notoriety will disappear in a snap.”

Gonzor laughed. The longer he was here, the more he relaxed. Better than the alternative, anyway. “Ah, they’ll never know. Trolling Stone’s pretty underground all things considered, and my artist isn’t here to completely fuck up my chances.”

The bartender smiled coldly at him. “Perhaps. But they’re smart. Business trolls tend to be, of course. I’m sure they’d pick up on whatever intent you have.”

“Eh, maybe. Who knows. Most trolls don’t if ya think about it.” Gonzor pushed his sunglasses up, keeping light green eyes obscured from the bartender. “Do you know?”

The bartender only took a cursory glance at Gonzor before he answered. “You’re a reporter. Paparazzi most likely. An oliveblood looking to write a juicy article on the celebrities here to achieve a blip of fame. They’re the only ones who come here.”

He grinned. “Sounds about right. That’s all Trolling Stone is, after all. Just another plain tabloid.”

Oh, how wrong he was.

The band started softly, with little more than the percussion tapping off a basic rhythm to keep the tealblooded singer on tempo. Dontoc glanced up from reading a host of frantic messages from Pallia on his palm husk just long enough to catch the Ball King and Queen collect on center stage to dance. That was something they did, apparently. A cute concept, even if it wasn’t much his thing to try to win himself. The whole thing also kept Careen off his back, which let him message Pallia to affirm he was perfectly safe sorry for taking so long, ask what on Alternia she was talking about, and if she was okay or if he placed undue stress taking so long. He only hoped she saw it soon.

“They’re just so deserving, don’t you think? Better than last sweep, anyway.” Careen sighed, resting a cheek in her hand. “How fitting that a glamorous fashionista and a model get paired up to feel like seadwellers for a night. Sure they’re jadebloods, but jadebloods are just so special in our society.”

Dontoc chuckled. “I suppose I shall take your word for it; however, I am afraid I do not know who they are.” Careen’s disappointed expression made his own pleasant one evaporate immediately. “Ah...forget I said anything,” he added.

“I didn’t think you voted for them though. Or wait, did you?” Atenic asked curiously. “After all, you’ve always preferred two trolls of the same or similar caste together!”

Careen answered with little more than a scowl thrown in Atenic’s direction. She turned back toward the scene at the center of the floor, enraptured by the glittering gold and colorful patterns the two had. The perfect distraction for him to catch his palm husk’s message from Pallia before it buzzed. don’t worry about it. you’ll be at ssandyhorn tomorrow right? I can explain then. jusst glad you’re ssafe :)~

Yes, I Should. For Once, I Shαll βe Home For 12+h Perigee.

Dontoc paused with a frown. The message felt like it...missed something. He looked up for a brief second to scan the table. Whatever he wanted to send, he didn’t want them watching. Careen, naturally still seemed completely unconcerned with him. Atenic stared longingly at the two trolls on the dance floor while she absently pushed crumbs around her plate with a fork. Sireot and Pereon were nowhere to be found. He only imagined Pereon had somewhere better to be. No one here noticed him. Not that he could blame them, all the glittering gems and gold jewelry reflecting from the lights managed to distract for a second until he remembered there was something more interesting.

Reαlly, I Miss You +erribly, Pαllia. I+ Shαll βe A Relief +o See You Once More.   

He stared at the message. Was it too much? He hoped not. It felt right to say, but he’d been wrong before. Then again, in direct concern with Pallia, they’d been mostly on the nose as of late.

With a slow breath, he hit send. No point going back now.

Her response was equal parts instant and gratifying, slowing down his already racing heartbeat. Figures of all trolls, Pallia would know better than to leave him in wait.

missss you too. leasst i get to sssee you ssoon?

Sooner +hαn βo+h Of Us An+icipα+e, If We Are Lucky.

The song ended on a few gentle piano notes. Spotlights turned back off, letting the usual 12th Perigee colored lights take hold of the room again. He looked up to see the two jadebloods laughing as they parted, making a joke of some sort most likely.

Zamiir tapped the microphone on the lapel of his vest. “That’s it for the 12th Perigee King and Queen. Thank you to everyone for participating in the vote! You’re the reason this stunning event stays alive. Happy holidays to all of you!”

The song shifted from a pleasant, upbeat tone to a soft piano piece. Whatever hold the song and dance had on Careen released her, and she turned back around to the table. “Dontoc, dearie, we should dance! We only have until midnight.”

“Indeed we do, Careen.” He thought back to Pallia, imagined her here with him right now instead of Careen, and the smile on his face almost felt genuine. He’d be away from Careen and with Pallia soon, anyway. “May as well take advantage of it while we can.”

1824 Wednesday 10 November

8 25/60

2 10/60

Breakfast at 9 50/60 – read from 24 to 29 volume 1 Carolus de Litchfield – sent to say I should be glad to see Mrs Barlow settled my accounts and looking over my money till 11 10/60 –

Dawdled over 1 thing or other till 11 40/60 when Mrs Barlow came – sat with me till 12 when she was sent for to colonel and Mrs Gregory Birch whod had called on her –

said how ill I behaved last night the opera had set me all wrong and I would go no more asked if she was ill no I saw she was pothered madame de Boyve had been disturbed last night by people sending for hot water she wanted to know if xxxxxxxx Mrs Barlow was not ill because she sat up till after one Mrs Barlow knew she did not like her to sit to burn to many candles and all the perpetually recurring little things pothered xxx her she leaned on my shoulder and seemed hurt ah said she I should not mind it so if I did not think you blamed me so much she cer tainly seems fond of me and said it spoilt her I told her I did not blame her she had not allowed she thought madame de Boyve selfish little minded and that she had not a good temper this was sspeaking plainly and intelligibly without leaving me to surmise more than she said and I was ssatisfied I was then affectionate saying now she had told me all this and found I did not blame at all I hoped she had got over all her potheration she thought the gregorys had brought the carriage to take her but she would say she was engaged to me

from 12 to 12 20/60 wrote the last 12 lines – then 1/2 hour translating from the Italian into French – Mrs Barlow then came back to me for 3/4 hour – then went down to see Mrs Heath and I got ready to go out and went down to them at 2 5/60 –

Mrs Heath left us on hearing our intention to go shopping, but on settling down for Mrs Barlow to have a crust of bread we began talking and continued till 3 40/60 when we jumped up went to the end of the rue de la Paix and a little way along the boulevard and got home at 5 to dress for dinner at 4 1/2 – went and sat with Mrs Barlow again from 4 40/60 to 5 then dinner –

Mr de Bellevue dined with us, and went to the play with Madame de Bourke Mademoiselle Hervey and Mademoiselle de Sans to whom he had given tickets and a box – Madame Carbonier, Mrs Barlow, Mrs Heath, Miss Middleton and I spent an agreeable evening together – Madame de Boyve and her son only with us a little while – Long conversation on religious subjects – all came away at 10 35/60 – I went with Mrs Barlow into her room and stayed with her till 11 1/2 when I came to my own room –

Mrs Barlow liked the opinions I had given on religious ssubjects and said I spoke very well   love making as usual and considerably excited when with her I said how happy I was when with her she said she was iust as happy when with me told her tonight I would call her maria asked if I might she said she was obliged to me for the wish to do so I asked if she would burn my letters she said she would do what ever xx I asked her I thanked her saying I should then write more at my ease assured that she would destroy all that it might be imprudent to keep this ssanction enough to my writing what I  like observed that many things I said it would not be prudent to write if she kept my letters she agreed and  when I talked of writing as I spoke she made no obiection but seemed well enough satisfied

she said in the morning iust before we went out I should suit her entirely but she would not suit me it would be difficult at first to be attentive enough to me without appearing to neglect her child –

speaking of her good figure and pretty hand and of her feet asked her to let me span her ankle she refused I said a was contented she should refuse me this now but could not bear it if we were always together oh said she then it would be a different thing she now stands nearer to me when I kiss her yet she always withdraws the moment it becomes that I am excited she certainly understand how to gain ones affections she has a tact and delicacy by which she owned she had retained the love of her husband I really do like her now and I think she is as much attached to me

she was rather low this morning said she must exert herself for her childs ssake otherwise should not care how soon she was removed from this world I think she regrets what she knows of my enga gement to Π-Mariana tho the handsome and proper manner in which she speaks of it pleases me much she told me today my only plan when I hinted at breakfast the engagement that is changing my mind was not to pother myself about it but let things go on quietly till I was left to myself and then determine

she has a nice little figure she is lady like and quiet yet very affectionate she really does sseem to know how to manage me and I might choose worse she still suspects she says that Π-Mariana likes me but if she she be the character I represent how could she do other than behave to me with the distance I represent while she is the wife of another I said I had known her before she married   yes ssaid she but you might neither of know your own minds then Mrs Heath in all her simplicity told us tonight she had flirted for amusement tired of her admirers as ssoon as gained as she did of everything else however much she had before wished for it she had longed for children yet the moment she had one did not care for having it tho she always did and always should love her children her husband was the only thing she never tired of and he used to tell her it was very well she did not tire of him –

a little gentle rain when I got up, or soon afterwards – then a fine day, tho’ a little damp rain about 5 – Fahrenheit 60°at 1 1/4 at which hour I had just finished (having been just an hour about it) the whole of this journal of today Except the 1st 12 lines –

Venereal condition with flow of low virulent discharge, one time treatment on the day, two times treatment in the evening-

1/2 hour eating grapes – rather high, whistling wind tonight -

Saturday 26 November 1831

7 3/4

12 35/..

L  +  +

fine morning Fahrenheit 61º at 8 1/4 - still bowels bad as ever  half a dozen small knobs - maKing notes from Gibbon on flyleaf of Lempriere’s Classical dictionary till 9 50/.. then breakfast -

Letter from Lady Gordon dated Lower Cheam? Epson Thursday 24th inst. franKed by Lady S-[Stuart] de R-[Rothesay]  I am to direct to her messers Coutts’s strand London - ‘mes gens are returned from Spain, after an only seven days voyage out and the same out again - the result had been most unsatifactory  still I’m not quite in despair - and I’ve still hopes which I thinK god never forsaKe me’ 

it seems she was at first afraid of the house stopping payment and being personally responsible  saw herself forced to fly over seas I dont apprehend this now’ then follows what she is proud to tell  an excellent account of Cosmo - his admirable conduct has gained the regard and esteem of all - ‘I’m unsettled of course in plans and mind’ but hopes ‘that next spring our plans may combine’ - if does not see Cosmo in England still thinks of Spain and what is 7 days steam pacKet? But of this hereafter’  not to tell Miss H[obart] all she Lady G[ordon] has ssaid  to say nothing of the disagreeables -

breakfast at 10 in an hour - out with miss H-[Hobart] from 11 20/.. to 12 35/.. - went to the castle - walKed about there some time and returned by the other side the down to near the church and then turned right and came out into george street - Out again at 12 50/.. - walKed to the 3 mile stone on the London road and should have been bacK in 2 hours but looKing about in vain for a little glass or china jar or something to hold almond paste for miss H-[Hobart] 

came in at 3 10/.. - dressed - read from 341 to 472 end of ‘Narrative of a voyage to the Pacific and Beering’s Strait, to co-operate with the polar Expeditions: performed in his majesty’s ship Blossom, under the command of Captain F. W. Beechey, R. N.  F. R. S. etc. in the years 1825, 26, 27, 28. Published by authority of the Lords commissions of the admiralty. in 2 volumes  volume 1 London Henry Colburn and Richard Bentley, New Burlington Street 1831.’ ‘printed by Samuel Bentley, Dorset Street Fleet Street’ - volume 1 pp.[pages] 472. volume 2 pp.[pages]        8vo.[octavo] -

then wrote the above of today till 6 3/4 - Dinner at 7 in 50 minutes - a little music - coffee at 8 1/2 - all going on very well  she offered to rub my left arm for rheumatism  I said something else would do better and kissed a little mole on the back of her neck I had kissed this morning on leaving and she took it all very well till in my fun following her to the fire and back  she laughed and said I was tiresome and I said oh I should teaze her so all my life  on which she said rather more gravely good humouredly but as if really in earnest  she hoped not  what was not the way of both could not be agreeable and that was not her way I quietly said she would get me into her way in time I did not seem to take very much notice but immediately took my book and  from 10 1/4 to 11 1/4 read the first 50 pp.[pages] (chapter 17) volume 3 Gibbon - then looKing over the chart of the world and other maps in my atlas till 10 55/.. and at 11 5/.. both came up to our rooms - at which hour Fahrenheit 62º in the drawing room -

she came to my room for a minute or two kissed and wished good night  saying the maids would be astonished at our coming up so ssoon  thinking to herself I had taken huff  but the fact is I never felt to care so little about it  glad to get to my room so ssoon   surely I shall take this opportunity of getting more into her own way and not teazing her  I shall thus save time and trouble  I shall be a great noodle if I do not give her a specimen of what she likes  and let her alone -

fine day till 1 then rained more or less small rain all the way to the 3 milestone very thick and damp returning but fair on getting home and afterwards damp evening - Fahrenheit 59 1/2º in my room (very small fire) now at 11 25/.. after writing the last 16 lines -

Friday 8 June 1838

7

12 ½

very fine morning F65 ½° at 8 20 am sat writing or thinking what to write to Hammersleys etc. Oddy came to ask about breakfast about near 9 – coiffeur not come – went to A- so poorly I could scarce hear her speak – ordered breakfast – the coiffeur came at 9 and A- had saw down to have her hair dressed about 10 minutes before breakfast was brought up – I saw down to breakfast, and had got about ¼ when A- was done and I had the coiffeur – A- had lain down and locked the doors – but on my 2nd going to her let me in – begged to have a room to herself and for no one to go and disturb her – sorry therefore to be obliged to get my imperial out, and poor A- went into the drawing room – this is very terrible – I scarce know what to do – so long a journey as to the Pyrenees with A-‘s nerves in this state! Qui oserait entreprendre un tel voyage dans une telle circonstance? courage? ou que faut il que je fasse ? writing my journal does me more good than anything – I must do as well as I can – L’esprit s’excite par les difficultés – had just written so far, when when Dr. Tupper called to say we could not possibly see the château at St. Germain – he sat ¼ hour or 20 minutes – very civil about A- I said she was very poorly – went in to ask her if she would see him – no ! he explained the nature of cuticular complaints – not the skin that was the seat of the disease but the corpus mucosum or reticulatum from an acid matter oozed (might be distinguished with a good microscope) and a little medicine was required – these complaints should not be neglected – no outward application would do any good – the douches would do no good – nor did he think the waters of St. Sauveur would do any good but if Miss Walker thought they would, it would be best to try – had had Madame Contant for a moment while Dr. Tupper was here – I was not dressed save in my dressing and received him i[n] the dining [room] A- being in the salon – to be at Madame C- at 1 – A- would go – took the laquais de place only and off in the carriage (which had waited since 11 ½) at 12 ½ - 1 5 hour at Madame C-‘s choosing a shawl (‘tapis, cachemire [cashmere] Français’) etc. bought 2 or 3 pair of gloves for A- in returning at Privats’ and home about 2 – put on A-‘s shawl she had just bought and left her at home Oddy gone at 2 ¼ to take her lesson in her dressing and George went out with me as far as the embassy where not wanting him, I let him go – left my passport to be sent to the prefecture, and left my card ‘Miss Lister’ for lady Granville at the porters’ – then drove off to n°5 r. de l’université – Madame de N- sortie – left no card – then to Madame Cuviers’ – she ill but Madame ----- received for her – I concluded for I did not distinctly the madame it was Mademoiselle Duvauchel and I was ushered in to the cidevant Mademoiselle D- now, as I soon found from her talk to a young gentleman tête-à-tête with her, Madame – she mentioned mon mari twice and ‘la Bretagne où j’habite habituellement’ – was in Paris by accident at the time her ‘maman’ was taken ill – had come to take her a little ‘voyage à  Bordeaux’ told the alarm she had been in but that maman was now out of danger but all this was told to the moustachioed gentleman not to me to whom she did not address one word but (on my saying I had called to inquire after Madame de Cuvier) that I was trés bonné and a kind distinct word on my coming away which I did in two minutes with sufficient dignity and civility  no servant shewed me down or even opened the outdoor I did it myself  I wondered at all this but cared not  who is she now by marriage? she looked neat and well and satisfied to be Madame at last – Inquired for M. and Madame Audoin at their door – Madame A- sortie – left my card and wrote on it my address in pencil – then to r. de Suresne n°23 bis – Long talk with Madame Figarol about the femme de chambre – It ended my saying she might come at 9am tomorrow to sew for a day or 2, and if I liked her, I would make inquiries des renseignements (her character) from her last place – home at 5, and found Dr. Double that moment come – said I was glad he had come – had thought of sending for him – A- poorly – explained – he wrote a prescription (ordonnance)  for a ‘liniment’ to rub the back along the spine for 20 minutes at night before getting into bed and for the same length of time just getting up in a morning – of huile de camerille? and ether oscitique and laudanum de Sydenham each ½ oz. to be well shaken before used – sure the waters will cure A- will come at 8 pm on

SH:7/ML/E/21/0119

and give a written direction to A- for all she is to do – her tongue was good, her pulse good – riding and travelling very good for her – I joked afterwards and said the sight of Dr. D- had done her good – yes! she was very glad she had not see Dr. T- he would have given her medicine and thought nothing was the matter but she was hipped – dinner at 7 – the carriage waited some time left the servants at dinner took the laquais (Lefevre) and off about 8 – ordered 5lbs. roast beef at Michels’ for tomorrow at 7pm and left the prescription at Bérals r. de la paix – then drove along the boulevards to the elephant to the column that there is now to be commemorating the victims of les trios jours (Juliet 1830.) got the liniment in returning then drove to the Palace Royal and bought a bottle of crème de Noyau des Isles for A- and a small bottle of orange flavour water – then home at 9 ¾ - A- had Oddy then I – then at 10 ½ for 20 minutes rubbed A-‘s back and then wrote all the last p. and so far of this – fine day F65 ½° now at 11 50 pm  what humbug about A- and her illness and from Oddys’ manner gently it seems she thinks sso too?  I must get over this Pyrenees job as well as I can and get rid of her as ssoon as I cann poor thing what will become of her!