#sideways adopted because his parents are alive and canonically do leave him with a full time nanny | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nerdpoe · 19 days

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Batman and Robin are fighting Poison Ivy! She throws pollen at them...the wrong type. Also, it misses and hits some kid with a camera.

She meant to throw cuddle pollen.

She threw sex pollen.

She freezes, horrified, because Robin is a kid. Luckily, it misses.

Unluckily, it hits an even smaller kid.

She and Batman and Robin all hurry to the kid's side, Ivy mentally trying to figure out if the kid'll survive being sedated long enough for her to make the cure.

The kid, though, won't stop sneezing. And itching his face and neck. Also wheezing a little.

Anyways that's how Tim finds out that he's super allergic to Ivy's sex pollen, and it doesn't do what it's supposed to with him, because his body just goes into "Allergy Season Mode".

Good news; the swelling of his airways made it possible to decontaminate him without any actually getting in his bloodstream.

Bad news; he called Robin Dick by accident when he'd been disoriented by the sudden onset of Extreme Allergies, and now Batman and Robin are very interested to know how he knows Robin's name.

#dcuau #batman au #tim drake #dick grayson #bruce wayne #tim's allergic to the sex pollen #but not the fanon cuddle pollen #tim gets adopted before jason #sort of #sideways adopted because his parents are alive and canonically do leave him with a full time nanny #when they aren't there #but i mean if we wanna got he neglectful drakes route sure #adopted for real

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