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carmenlire · 1 year

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Kiss It Better

read on ao3

Sangwoo knows as soon as he wakes up that his annual cold is imminent.

It’s been the bane of his autumn since he was in middle school. Every year, without fail, he gets the most terrible cold. His throat will become so sore he can’t eat; his joints ache something awful until he’s too sensitive even just laying still. He goes through a box of tissues an hour and is an all around mess.

He hates it. It interferes with his school work and makes him feel so rumpled and gross. He always ends up missing at least two full days of classes and it’s infuriating knowing that his immune system can’t just continue with business as usual.

Today is day zero. The first day he feels a little tickle in his throat, can see his very near future– the swollen eyes, the hoarse voice that just makes him cough even more, the sweat-soaked chills.

However.

This year is different. This year, Sangwoo thinks as he turns his head and looks over at Jaeyoung, he has a boyfriend.

The idea is still novel even if they’ve been dating for almost a year. Sangwoo is so happy that he didn’t even think is was possible to feel this much. He sighs a little as he reaches out and runs a gentle hand through Jaeyoung’s hair. As much as it pains him, Sangwoo is well aware that the next week isn’t going to be very fun.

Frowning a little in thought, Sangwoo’s heart clenches at the way Jaeyoung turns towards his hand even further, wanting to be closer even when he’s sleeping.

It’s a little embarrassing and even more unbelievable that Sangwoo has this boy and he loves him to distraction and is loved just as fiercely in return.

As he watches his boyfriend in the early morning light, Sangwoo knows that he needs to pull back a little.

Sangwoo doesn’t want Jaeyoung to catch his cold– he has an important deadline coming up– and, more than that, he doesn’t want to be the reason that Jaeyoung feels as miserable as he knows he will when he can’t remember what it felt like to be able to breath out of both nostrils and when his chest didn’t ache just from breathing.

Plus, well, he also doesn’t want Jaeyoung to see him like that. Gross and snotty and even more easily irritable than usual.

(Forget that now that they’re together, while Sangwoo can be prickly and exacting, Jaeyoung is rarely treated to the full Sangwoo Effect anymore. Yuna thinks it’s disgusting how soft they are on each other, especially considering how this all started).

Sangwoo sighs again, petulant at himself and his body, as he carefully climbs out of bed. He gets ready quietly, moving through his morning routine without waking Jaeyoung, and leaves for his first class of the day. All throughout his morning, he plans how to go about this.

This being operation avoid Jaeyoungie-hyung.

He starts out fairly strong, or at least he’d like to think so.

Jaeyoung, for his part, starts his own day without suspecting anything. His own alarm goes off minutes after Sangwoo’s left for campus and he reaches out a hand, still heavy with sleep, to Sangwoo’s side of the bed. Feeling the coolness of sheets, he sighs but he knows that their schedules on Tuesday mornings never sync up.

Still, it doesn’t take Jaeyoung long to notice that something is off with his routine-loving boyfriend as the man in question starts coming up with excuses for why he can’t see Jaeyoung.

Oh, he has to meet a professor during lunch. Sorry hyung, I have to get this project done tonight you can’t come over. The first time it happens, Jaeyoung pouts for a second just to be dramatic but goes ahead and meets Yuna and Hyeongtak for lunch without issue. Yuna ends up throwing a few of her chips at him when he can’t help but mention– more than once– that Sangwoo never plans meetings during their lunch hour. Hyeongtak, for his part, just pilfers the chips from Jaeyoung’s plate to his own.

When Sangwoo avoids him that night, however, Jaeyoung’s suspicious side take a sharp and sudden interest but he still easily accepts it at face value, working halfheartedly on one of his commissions for half the evening before growing restless without Sangwoo there to ground him. To his consternation, it seems that he really has become so used to working next to his boyfriend in the evenings that not having Sangwoo there is a void that’s endlessly distracting in the worst way.

Instead, Jaeyoung starts a new show on Netflix that Sangwoo refused to watch because of its historical inaccuracy while also managing to send his boyfriend a truly alarming number of messages that aim to both annoy and endear.

Sangwoo responds to them later that night after he finishes his homework and Jaeyoung is treated to a goodnight selca that makes his heart warm and his cheeks ache with how much he loves his boy.

He’s wearing one of Jaeyoung’s hoodies, hair messy like it only is right before or after bed, and there’s a hint of a smile on his face. The message is short and sweet. Goodnight, hyung. I love you. Don’t forget to set an alarm for an hour earlier than usual.

Part of Jaeyoung wants to scoff because they’ve been dating less than a year and he’d made it just fine on his own before he had a boyfriend that was part Google Calendar-- but a much bigger part of him just wiggles in delight because Sangwoo has memorized his schedule and cares enough to send these little reminders. It makes something soft and warm curl up and flutter in his stomach anytime he stops to think about it.

Still, as he studies the picture, he thinks he sees a hint of red lining Sangwoo’s eyes, touching the tip of his nose. Jaeyoung stares at the selca long enough to commit it to memory but he tells himself it was just the lighting and goes to sleep– but not before sending his own selca and with message containing way too many heart emojis.

All of which to say, Sangwoo is able to dodge Jaeyoung for another day before his careful plans melt into disarray. By this time, his throat hurts anytime he tries to swallow and he accidentally-on-purpose snapped at an upperclassman who tried to wheedle for the answers to this afternoon’s homework. He’s started sniffling, too, which is especially irritating whenever it’s otherwise quiet in the library and he’s the only one being so disruptive.

It’s Thursday and he already knows that his plans for the weekend will consist of nothing but being lonely and miserable with nothing but a box of Kleenex for company.

Because that’s another thing. It’s been less than 48 hours since he saw Jaeyoung and he’s going half crazy with it. Knowing that Jaeyoung is so close but that he can’t see him is affecting Sangwoo more than he thought it would. Especially when he’s so miserable and feels like shit and knows that it’ll get worse before it gets better.

He catches himself wanting to text Jaeyoung every hour– sometimes just to talk but a lot of the time he has to stop himself from asking his boyfriend to come over. God, he wants nothing more than to lay down on his boyfriend’s chest, to be wrapped up in arms that make him feel small and safe and cared for. He’s been sleeping in one of Jaeyoung’s hoodies for the past couple of days but it’s a sad imitation of the real thing.

But no, he tells himself firmly for the hundredth time. He doesn’t want to get his boyfriend sick. Jaeyoung has so much going on and it would be selfish and unfair of him to not only impose but impose knowing that Jaeyoung could catch this hellish cold.

Saying it doesn’t help the way he wants, though. He’s always been a little needy, a bit clingy when he’s not feeling well. When it’s happened at university, he’s powered through knowing that there was no other option. Knowing that Jaeyoung is just a call away is bittersweet.

Jaeyoung, for his part, definitely knows by this point that something is up and that Sangwoo is avoiding him.

What he doesn’t know is why.

Sangwoo’s replies are still as understatedly attentive as ever. He still sent a goodnight selca last night. But besides his time in France, this is the longest they’ve gone without seeing each other in person and it’s driving Jaeyoung more than a little crazy.

Deciding enough is enough and that Sangwoo can damn well tell him to his face why he’s avoiding him, Jaeyoung decides to meet him after his coding class that afternoon. It’s Thursday and Thursdays are always their movie nights and Sangwoo hasn’t ghosted him yet but Jaeyoung can see it coming and he plans to stop Sangwoo in his tracks.

Most of Jaeyoung’s afternoon is spent meeting with a few potential collaborators on a web campaign. As soon as that concludes, however, Jaeyoung crosses the city to campus.

Looking down at his watch, he sees that Sangwoo’s class should be letting out in ten minutes, so he heads over to the computer science building to wait. He replies to Yuna’s texts in the meantime and looks up just as a dozen or so students start pouring out the doors.

He scans their faces but none of them are Sangwoo, which is unusual. His boyfriend is usually the first one out. Jaeyoung’s just getting ready to text him, see if he missed him after all, when he finally sees Sangwoo exiting the building.

Before he even quite knows what he’s seeing, something in Jaeyoung’s heart just melts. It’s a cold November day, the sky dark and gloomy, the air frigid. And there Sangwoo is, bundled in one of his hoodies– a red one, to Jaeyoung’s surprise– face mask and hat all but completely obscuring his face. Over the hoodie, is one of Jaeyoung’s jackets that he’d thought he’d lost last time he did laundry.

His mouth curls at the corner in delight. He’s such a little thief, Jaeyoung thinks absolutely besotted.

“Sangwoo-ah,” Jaeyoung calls out.

Sangwoo jerks to a standstill, looking up. Even though most of his face is covered, Jaeyoung sees well enough that Sangwoo feels caught.

“Hyung?” Sangwoo asks, not stepping any closer. “What are you doing here?”

Well, fine then. Jaeyoung takes it upon himself to close the distance between them. He doesn’t stop until he’s standing right in front of Sangwoo and then he leans down until he’s in his space. “Can’t a man surprise his boyfriend after class?” He raises an eyebrow, knowing he’s definitely annoying Sangwoo.

And there’s the spark in Sangwoo’s eyes that’s always a dead giveaway that he’s about to get huffy. Something in Jaeyoung preens in satisfaction– he loves getting a reaction out of Sangwoo.

In the next moment, though, he’s frowning. Because sure there’s a spark now but Sangwoo’s eyes still look a little dull, the shadows underneath pronounced. His forehead is a little sweaty and that doesn’t make sense at all– sure, Sangwoo is wearing a hoodie and jacket but it is November and it is freezing. He’s dressed appropriately.

“Baby,” Jaeyoung asks, voice dropping to something low and warm.

Sangwoo had said once, half delirious with sleep deprivation, that he loves Jaeyoung’s voice always but especially when it takes on this cadence. Makes me feel taken cared of, feels like it wraps around me, makes me feel warm, he’d said.

The admission had ruined Jaeyoung in a way that made him want to use the voice all the time, just to watch the way tension melted off Sangwoo’s shoulders.

He’d made a study of it– using the voice during sex was a given but slipping into it when Sangwoo was stressed, when he wanted to tease in a way that made both of them turn into each other, when it was just the two of them and Jaeyoung just wanted Sangwoo to know he was there– the feeling is indescribable, knowing the power Sangwoo lets him wield.

Now, when there’s just a few other students rushing around, when it’s like the two of them are in their own bubble on campus, using that tone stills something deep in both of them.

Jaeyoung reaches a hand up, trails a finger over the shell of Sangwoo’s ear.

He wasn’t really worried that something was wrong. Most of Jaeyoung just missed Sangwoo and wanted to see him and maybe tease him about how could school be more important than spending quality time with his perfect boyfriend.

Now, though– well, he’s still not worried but he knows something is up and he knows they aren’t leaving this spot until Sangwoo tells him what it is.

Sangwoo is staring straight ahead at his chin, not making eye contact. Jaeyoung leans even further down, until he’s almost touching the fabric of Sangwoo’s face mask, until his boyfriend has no choice but to meet his gaze.

“Baby,” he murmurs again, watching as something shifts behind those beautiful eyes– even when he’s not at his best, Sangwoo still takes his breath away. “Tell hyung what’s wrong, hm?”

He sees Sangwoo blink a few times– clearing his head, Jaeyoung thinks with not inconsiderable smugness— and he hears Sangwoo suck in a breath before his boyfriend is leaning back, holding a hand to Jaeyoung’s chest to keep the space between them.

“I told you that I need to focus on school for the next few days,” Sangwoo says. The words words feel stiff, like he’s rehearsed them too much to ring true.

Jaeyoung reaches up for the hand staying him, links their fingers together before bringing them right back flush against each other.

Sangwoo doesn’t protest.

Time to play a little dirty, then. Jaeyoung smiles, something small that curves the edge of his eyes. Sangwoo’s own narrow in warning but Jaeyoung doesn’t pay him any mind.

He squeezes the hand still in his, wraps his other arm around Sangwoo until it rests low on his back. He pulls him forward into an embrace close to a hug as he whispers in his ear, “Come on, baby. You know I can tell when you’re lying.”

To his surprise, Sangwoo doesn’t immediately pull back and get defensive. Sangwoo doesn’t deflect or start arguing at all. There’s no quip on his tongue, eager to spill out and start a round of bickering that’s usually fun and engaging.

No, instead his cute little boyfriend just snuggles into him?

Jaeyoung can’t help the shiver that snakes up his spine as Sangwoo noses along the column of his throat. His face mask is scratchy against his skin but his boyfriend doesn’t seem to mind the barrier between them.

“Sangwoo?”

Sangwoo’s arms come up to wrap around his waist, holding tight as if to make sure Jaeyoung doesn't try to pull away. He lays his head against Jaeyoung’s shoulder, seems to settle in, letting out an absent hum of relief.

Tightening his grip, Jaeyoung starts swaying them back and forth a little. Resting his head on top of Sangwoo’s, Jaeyoung can’t help his smile. He squeezes him closer. “Sangwoo-ah, baby, can you answer me?”

Something in Jaeyoung– definitely his heart– absolutely melts at the way Sangwoo relaxes completely against him. This isn’t anything new, Sangwoo has a tendency to slip like this when it’s just them, but it is unexpected for it to happen in public. And while Jaeyoung still doesn’t think anything is dangerously wrong, he needs to find out what’s going on.

Finally, Sangwoo sighs. His voice is low and hoarse and rough at the edges. His tone is petulant as he reluctantly says, “I don’t feel good, hyung.”

Jaeyoung’s heart squeezes painfully before tumbling at Sangwoo’s feet. He lays the softest kiss to the shell of Sangwoo’s ear, more impression of intent than anything else. “What’s wrong, baby?”

It’s silent for a long moment that fills with the sounds of birds in the distance, the chatter of a group of students several yards away talking about the midterm they all just failed. Internally, Jaeyoung starts compiling a list of things he might need in the immediate future, from medicine to Sangwoo’s favorite Ghibli film to that chicken congee recipe he had his eomma email him during his freshman year.

Sangwoo eventually pulls back enough to meet Jaeyoung’s eyes. His own are red and a little hazy. He stares at Jaeyoung for a long moment and Jaeyoung lets himself look back. The truth is, Sangwoo looks more than a little miserable and things are coming together but he needs Sangwoo to just tell him so that Jaeyoung can do what he wants to– what, suddenly, he has a burning need to do.

“I’m in the midst of an annual cold,” Sangwoo finally says, sounding extremely disgruntled. Jaeyoung bites his cheek so he doesn’t smile– God, Sangwoo is so cute like this.

Jaeyoung leans a little closer, narrowing his eyes in the way that’s mostly teasing but still has a kernel of seriousness. “And why didn’t you tell me? Me, your boyfriend, whose job is to take care of his boyfriend when he’s not feeling well?” He pouts exaggeratedly. “I can’t take care of you if you avoid me, Jagiya, if you don't tell me when something's wrong.”

Studiously avoiding his gaze, Sangwoo takes a shuddering breath before he mutters, “You shouldn’t have to take care of me, especially not when you have so much on your plate right now.”

Jaeyoung immediately shakes his head. “Doesn’t matter,” he says firmly.

Even under the mask, Jaeyoung can see Sangwoo’s mouth turn down. “I could get you sick.”

Jaeyoung reaches a hand up to flick against the brim of Sangwoo’s hat just to see the mulish set of his brows better. “Doesn’t matter,” he repeats.

“But–”

“Sangwoo-ah,” Jaeyoung cuts him off, leaning down until he’s back in his space. He gentles his voice. “Baby, I love you and I love taking care of you.” And oh, here he gets to see the quiet happiness well in Sangwoo’s eyes, the easing of tension along his brow.

“I want to be there when you’re happy and feeling good but I also want to be there when you feel like shit and not your best. Don’t you want that, too?”

“It’s not fair,” Sangwoo offers weakly, closely his eyes against the onslaught that is a pouting Jaeyoung.

Jaeyoung hums in thought. “What’s not fair, my stubborn boyfriend, is you trying to hide this from me. Do you know how amazing I am at playing nursemaid? You haven’t even tasted my congee!”

Sangwoo leans forward until he can rest his forehead against Jaeyoung’s chest. “I’m probably going to be an ass when I’m sick.”

Sangwoo feels Jaeyoung laugh before his boyfriend’s hands come up to rub soothingly down his back. It feels amazing, exactly what he’d been imagining over the past few days when he desperately wanted to call Jaeyoung for the comfort only his boyfriend could provide– he feels warm and cared for and it’s so good he feels tears sting his eyes.

Now that he’s caught, he doesn’t really want to argue and belabor his point.

No, he knows what he wants– what he’s wanted since he first started coming down with this hellish cold– and he just doesn’t have it in himself to deny him– them both, apparently– of this any longer.

His voice is tinged with exhaustion but any remaining tension drains out of him as Sangwoo finally accepts that he does have someone he can lean on and that the person is not only willing but eager to do so.

“Please take care of me, Jaeyoungie-hyung.”

Jaeyoung’s heart stills at the request, soft spoken but aching with want. His chest feels too small to contain this feeling, the sheer desire to care for the man in front of him in any way he needs, in every way he can. “Of course, baby,” he whispers against the top of his head, laying a kiss over his hat-covered hair. “Of course.”

It’s another few moments before Jaeyoung eases his hold on Sangwoo just to immediately take his hand. He leans down, quick, just to kiss the edge of Sangwoo's cheek where it meets the mask and even in that barely-there touch, Jaeyoung felt the warmth of Sangwoo's flush. “Let’s go home.”

Over the next three days, Sangwoo’s cold does indeed gets worse. He loses his voice almost completely, his coughing annoys him so much that he can only wonder at how Jaeyoung seems unbothered, and he goes through enough tissues that he should’ve bought stock in Kleenex.

Through it all, Jaeyoung takes care of him. That first night, they went back to Sangwoo’s apartment together and while Sangwoo took a shower, Jaeyoung ran to the corner mart to pick up anything he might need, including groceries for his eomma’s congee.

When he gets back to the apartment, Sangwoo is in a clean sweatshirt of Jaeyoung’s and a pair of leggings, damp hair hanging in his eyes. Jaeyoung urges him to rest on the couch while he sets about making dinner. He hasn’t been sick in a while, though, and so when he gets to step seven he calls his eomma just to make sure that Sangwoo will have something edible to eat at the end of this.

His mom is endeared– Jaeyoung has talked extensively about Sangwoo– and Jaeyoung keeps his voice low as he finishes cooking in the kitchen.

More often than he’d admit, Jaeyoung takes a step back to check in on his boyfriend. At one point, he loses himself watching the slow rise and fall of his chest, enthralled with the way the light from the lamp in the corner warms Sangwoo’s otherwise pale face.

He makes it back in the kitchen just on time. He would’ve been so upset if he’d overcooked the chicken, he thinks wryly. Sangwoo’s throat is already itchy and irritated, he doesn’t need to try to choke down dry chicken on top of it.

All of that effort must pay off because Sangwoo actually does cry, just a little, when Jaeyoung wakes him up with a bowl later in the evening. Jaeyoung doesn’t tease, doesn’t show just how he’s melted into a puddle at seeing his boyfriend’s eyes widen upon seeing dinner after his nap, at the way Sangwoo tears up because it’s so good and Jaeyoung is taking care of him so well even though it’s only been two hours and he loves this man so much, he’s so lucky–

Jaeyoung cuts his rambling off with a kiss, looking pleased with himself when he pulls back.

Sangwoo, for his part, is horrified. “You’re going to get sick,” he hisses, covering his mouth, scandalized.

Jaeyoung just shrugs and winks at him. “Guess you’ll have to take care of me, then, huh?”

Sangwoo does his best to glower but it quickly morphs into a sneeze and Jaeyoung laughs softly, way too fucking endeared as Sangwoo just looks like a sad kitten and really, he wonders, the heart can’t be meant to hold all of this feeling.

Most of the weekend is spent with Sangwoo cuddled up to Jaeyoung, resting his absolutely aching head against his boyfriend’s chest and using Jaeyoung as his own space heater. Jaeyoung keeps a strict schedule with the medicine and fluids and they spend the entire weekend watching movies or resting. Jaeyoung, for his part, spends a lot of the time that Sangwoo is asleep simply watching his boyfriend.

It’s a quiet but no less striking contentment.

Even though Sangwoo’s hair is sweaty and Jaeyoung definitely knows he’s going to be sick by this time next week, it’s more than worth it to him. And contrary to Sangwoo’s warning, he’s not an asshole at all– he’s pliant and soft around the edges, clingy in a way Jaeyoung loves, in a way he doesn’t ever see himself getting used to.

It tempers something in him, being Sangwoo’s boyfriend, the person Sangwoo can rest with, the person Sangwoo lets in. It’s something he’s never had before and treasures immensely– even if it means Sangwoo sneezing right in his face on Saturday morning when Jaeyoung wakes him up for his morning dose of medicine.

And sure enough, ten days later it’s Sangwoo’s chance to return the favor as Jaeyoung proves to be a dramatic– but not difficult, not at all if you know him, if you love him, if you treasure any and all chance to show him and care for him– patient himself.

#can't believe i ended up writing an entire fic based on anon's idea they sent this morning #i love these two so much i can't #i hope anyone who reads this enjoys it!!#i haven't felt like this writing fic in way too long. i missed it #my writing #kiss it better #semantic error fic #semantic error

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spaceskam · 2 years

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stupid with love

Summary: Jaeyoung is bored, Sangwoo offers a helping hand.

Warnings: handjobs while driving, not quite voyeurism but thought i’d mention it

ao3

Jaeyoung was bored out of his mind.

They were heading south for a small vacation getaway before Jaeyoung had to go to France and as excited as he was to be at their destination, the trip itself was agonizing. They were taking turns driving and they had music on, but it didn't help. He'd already gotten tired of his playlist and just wanted to be there already. He thought about drawing to blow some time, but if he looked down for that long, he'd get car sick and something told him that would be an even worse way to kick off their vacation. So he did nothing but pout and look out the window while Sangwoo drove.

Well, he did nothing but that until Sangwoo's warm hand placed on his thigh.

Jaeyoung's eyes fixed on it and where it lay just a few centimeters above his knee. He really liked Sangwoo's hands–he really liked everything about Sangwoo, but his hands were almost as big as Jaeyoung's and it was a friendly reminder that, while Sangwoo felt small sometimes, he was actually far from it. He was strong and capable and his hand was always a secure presence, something safe and claiming that his previous partners never quite managed with just a simple touch. He liked when his hands were on him.

"Sangwoo-yah," he said, just to say it.

Sangwoo didn't answer as he kept his eyes on the road, focusing as he drove because Sangwoo was a good driver and a righteous person and he never broke rules. But the fact that his hand was sitting on Jaeyoung’s knee was proof he'd break at least one.

"What happened to two hands on the wheel? You miss me that much?" Jaeyoung teased. Sangwoo's thumb rubbed over his knee, soft and deliberate and Jaeyoung was smiling so wide his cheeks hurt. He liked when Sangwoo was affectionate for affection's sake. It was rare and it always felt so nice.

But then his fingers squeezed the inside of his bare thigh, smoothing over his skin as he released and unintentionally–or maybe actually intentionally, he was still unsure–made his basketball shorts ride up.

"Sangwoo-yah," Jaeyoung said, eyebrows raising in intrigue, "What are you doing?"

"You're bored," Sangwoo said simply, "One of the rules of being in a relationship is to make it not boring."

"Or be bored together," Jaeyoung added. He couldn't help but be interested in what Sangwoo meant. He settled back in his seat, staring. "Are you not bored, Sangwoo-yah?"

"No," Sangwoo said. His hand was steady on the wheel, eyes on the road and driving straight on the empty highway even as his hand slid a bit higher. "I'm not as restless as you."

"I'm wounded," Jaeyoung said, but it didn't sound as dramatic as he intended considering he couldn't stop smiling at his stoic boyfriend.

Fingertips grazed his inner thigh higher and higher, pushing the fabric up with each movement and the X-rated fantasy that had popped in his mind started to become more likely. Jaeyoung could feel heat pooling in his stomach and he shifted in his seat. Sangwoo didn't stop and Jaeyoung still wasn't completely sure of his intentions until his pinky finger stretched out and pulled loose the little bow he'd tied the strings of his shorts in and then dragged that finger over his growing bulge. Jaeyoung jumped at the bold move, but it made Sangwoo pull away which was definitely not what he wanted.

"I'm sorry, I should've asked," Sangwoo said. Jaeyoung felt hot all over from what was happening, eyes wide in shock and intrigue. Sangwoo initiating something like that, it being somewhere so open and yet contained while being on the road, the danger and rule breaking aspect of it. His brain was short circuiting.

"No, I like it, I just–we're in the car."

"If you cum in your shorts, you have extra," Sangwoo said in the tone he always said things that he felt were logical. Of course his dirty clothes hamper was in the closet, that's where clothes went. Of course he had to wear his hat on cloudy days, that's when the sun rays were most dangerous. Of course he could give Jaeyoung a handjob on the highway, he had spare pants in the backseat.

Jaeyoung flushed red and looked out the window with a scandalized, "Sangwoo-ssi, that's so dirty."

But he was really eager to see how far he would go.

"Mm."

"Aish, Chu Sangwoo, your boyfriend is so bored. Didn't you just say one of us can't be bored?" Jaeyoung said, turning back to Sangwoo with his quickly rejuvenated confidence. He was staring forward, eyes set in that soft glare he had when he knew he was being teased and lips naturally pouty. There was no wonder that Jaeyoung was in love.

He reached over to grab Sangwoo's hand, placing a kiss on his palm before placing it back on his thigh. He settled into the seat, leaning back, and looking at Sangwoo with no expectations. He would be happy with whatever, even if he just wanted to ride with his hand on his leg for the rest of the drive.

But this was Sangwoo and he was nothing if not stubborn.

His hand slid further up again, hesitant and maybe a little distracted. Which was good. His main focus should be on the road. Still, he rubbed Jaeyoung's thigh and Jaeyoung, for his part, stayed extremely still even as blood rushed south at the simple touch now that he knew what Sangwoo’s intentions were.

The music playing was quiet, but it was a lot of noise in itself and beyond that he couldn't place what it was. Chu Sangwoo's music taste was chaotic at best and Jaeyoung had tried so hard to get into it. He'd found a few songs here and there that he likes, but there wasn't much overlap. Today, however, the unhinged EDM set the tone beautifully as Sangwoo palmed him over his shorts with just the right amount of pressure.

Jaeyoung moaned loudly at the touch–admittedly over exaggerated just to see the way Sangwoo's eyebrows set in further annoyance and his hand paused. Jaeyoung laughed softly and shifted in his seat again, trying not to be too obvious that he was chasing his movement. This was playful, in a way, and unserious and he wanted to keep it that way. It was too rare Chu Sangwoo started things like this to push for more. This was totally in Chu Sangwoo's hands–literally and figuratively–and he'd be damned to take it.

Slowly, Chu Sangwoo pressed down again, kneading against him in a way that felt experimental despite the fact he's touched him enough times to lose count. Well, Jaeyoung could probably count because each time was exciting and felt like he was on top of the world and it hadn’t been that long since they’d started sexual encounters in the first place, but he was a little distracted at the moment.

"That feels good, Chu Sangwoo," Jaeyoung told him, soft as he sunk further into his seat. He knew he liked feedback and instructions–it worked well because Jaeyoung liked to talk.

"Yeah?"

Jaeyoung couldn't respond with anything other than a shaky breath as Sangwoo grabbed him through his shorts. With that, he was fully hard and visibly hot and bothered to say the very least. He readjusted his hands against the door and the center console, not sure what to do with them and knowing he couldn't touch Sangwoo as much as he desperately wanted to. He was driving. Safety first.

"You know, Sangwoo-ssi, I understand why people have sex naked. Really feeling overheated right now," he said, keeping his voice light despite the fact that he was feverish and the sun burning through the windows didn't help. He was going to bake under the unrelenting nature of his boyfriend and the sun both at this rate.

Sangwoo didn't respond, but he removed his hand which caused Jaeyoung to whine involuntarily. However, Sangwoo just turned the air on high and then moved his hand back to Jaeyoung's lap, sliding beneath the waistband of his shorts without looking, almost like he'd practiced it. A shocked laugh spilled out of Jaeyoung, but the feeling of the cool air on his hot cheeks and Sangwoo's hand on his skin were two things he had no complaints about.

It was a little dry, a little awkward and restricted, but Sangwoo's hand wrapped around his cock beneath his shorts and stroked him a couple times, testing the waters. Jaeyoung stared at the side of his face with a dopey smile and breathed with him. He loved him a lot, more than he'd loved anyone. It was scary in the best, most exhilarating way.

"Chu Sangwoo," Jaeyoung said, not really having anything to say and yet needing to speak anyway. His breathing was getting heavier, body thrumming his appreciation.Sangwoo readjusted his grip and pumped his hand a few more times, his thumb sliding over the head and gathering what little precum he could and sliding that over him. His eyes never left the road; he never swerved. "You're such a good driver."

Chu Sangwoo, brilliant and incredible and perfect Chu Sangwoo, removed his hand just to lick his palm and let saliva pool in his palm. Jaeyoung's mouth felt dry, shocked into silence not for the first time, but apparently not the last either. Chu Sangwoo never failed to surprise him.

"Sangwoo," he gasped as his hand slipped back under his waistband, messy and so uncharacteristic but so good , "Sangwoo, this feels so good. I like this."

"Driving for extended periods of time can cause your brain to become distracted and heighten the possibility of an accident, so it's recommended to have some sort of stimulation to keep your mind alert," Chu Sangwoo said. His voice was still somehow so even and unbothered, such a contrast to the way Jaeyoung's chest was heaving and the soft, involuntary moans that got trapped in his throat.

"Stimulation?" Jaeyoung laughed, breathy and in awe as pleasure pulsed through him. He pushed himself down into the seat more when his hips wanted to move, wanted to match Sangwoo's steady rhythm. "Sangwoo-yah, when we get to the hotel, I'm gonna blow you until I can't feel my jaw."

Sangwoo's cheeks flushed a painfully attractive shade of pink, his ears red enough to hurt. He was so cute. And he was Jaeyoung's. Ah, that would never get old.

Sangwoo shifted in his own seat and adjusted his hand again before he started pumping faster, everything getting messier and more intense by the second as wet sounds filled the air. Jaeyoung's stomach tightened more, the feeling too good to try to keep his face casual. His lips were parted and he couldn't help himself but to reach over, putting his hand on the back of Sangwoo's neck just to be doing something with his hands that involved Sangwoo's body. He tried to keep his eyes on him, but as he got closer and moans dragged out of him with each barely-there thrust of his hips into Sangwoo's fist, it became harder to keep them open.

"I'm close," he breathed. Sangwoo didn't give a verbal answer, but he moved his hand with intent. For once, Jaeyoung didn't try to hold off, letting his orgasm hit and rush through him with a choked out groan. Sangwoo stroked him through it because he was a good boyfriend. The best boyfriend. Jaeyoung held onto the back of his neck, careful yet secure.

In the few moments after, Jaeyoung was unfocused and hazy as he caught his breath. He didn't really want to come out of the blissful feeling because that meant going through the rest of the car ride uncomfortably sticky.

"Hyung," Sangwoo said, soft and addictive. Jaeyoung blinked back into awareness, getting the perfect view Sangwoo's face. His eyes were on him, pupils blown and the tiniest smile on his face. Jaeyoung immediately registered the look as fond.

"Hi," Jaeyoung said, smiling. It was probably too soon to say he loved him. He considered doing it anyway.

Sangwoo leaned over and met him in a kiss, slow and warm. Jaeyoung slid his hand into Sangwoo's hair and hummed mindlessly at the feeling of his tongue. He didn't know what had gotten into Sangwoo, but he couldn't have been more supportive of this chain of events. So supportive, it took him an embarrassingly long amount of time to realize the car had stopped.

Jaeyoung pulled away and looked around and found that they were in the parking lot of the hotel they were staying at. His whole body flushed with heat from embarrassment at the idea that he'd possibly finished while other people could've seen his face.

"Oh, we're here?"

"Yes," Chu Sangwoo said, still close. Jaeyoung petted his head, trying to calm his heart rate despite the fact that there was nothing calm about the heated way Sangwoo was watching him. He smiled wide.

"You knew we were almost here," Jaeyoung laughed, "Why didn't you wanna wait?"

Sangwoo's eyes set in a soft glare, the one he got when he was slightly embarrassed and didn't want to show it. Jaeyoung huffed a laugh and scratched at Sangwoo's scalp. He pressed another kiss to his lips.

"I can't believe you just did that. My Sangwoo, a daredevil," he said, “We should probably never do that again, that absolutely was not safe, but I really, really enjoyed that.”

Sangwoo got that shy smile on his lips and he looked down between them. God, yeah, Jaeyoung was in love. He didn’t care how many dumb things they did if it meant doing them together. And, who knows, maybe this was some sort of trial run and he would be down for phone sex when they were on opposite ends of the continent.

“Hyung,” Sangwoo said, voice a little more serious. Jaeyoung blinked a couple times before following Sangwoo’s line of sight to where his hand was still inside his shorts.

“Ah,” Jaeyoung said, smiling wide despite the fact that this definitely posed a problem, “Didn’t think of how we’d have to check in at the hotel, did we?”

Sangwoo was frowning as he slowly pulled his hand out from his shorts and his hand was pretty much covered in both spit and cum. Jaeyoung swallowed hard at the dizzying sight and tried to force himself to be logical about this.

Jaeyoung grabbed his wrist and used his shirt to clean Sangwoo’s hand off, making sure to get between his fingers. When it seemed to be clean, he grabbed the bottle of hand sanitizer that Sangwoo always kept in the passenger door of the car and poured some onto his skin, using both of his hands to work it into Sangwoo’s skin.

“That should work,” Jaeyoung said.

Sangwoo was staring at him, eyes wide and lips parted. It was kind of hard to read what he meant by that look. Could’ve been arousal, could’ve been disgust, could’ve been something else entirely, Jaeyoung wasn’t sure. He was still learning all the little things that made up Sangwoo.

“But now you’re dirty.”

“I’ll be okay. Why don’t you go get us checked in and I’ll change my shirt and meet you inside?” Jaeyoung suggested. Sangwoo blinked a couple times before leaning in again and giving him a chaste kiss on the lips.

“Okay,” Sangwoo said as he pulled back.

Jaeyoung smiled. “I have the cutest, sweetest boyfriend in the world.”

With that, Sangwoo threw the car door open and clambered out in a swift motion, slamming the door behind him and stalking towards the entrance while Jaeyoung’s laughter filled the empty car.

This trip was going to be worthwhile, he just knew it.

#semantic error #semantic error fic #jangchu #jangchu fic #jang jaeyoung #chu sangwoo #my fic

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guzhufuren · 2 months

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i just read a really fucking good fic about autistic ace Chu Sangwoo exploring biting kink

#like. wow #fics #semantic error #mine #<<< this rec post is mine. not the fic

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smilingangel582 · 1 year

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A cute computer?

Aahhhh, what a lovely series. Semantic error is quite a nice story with an interesting plot and vivid characters of different sorts. My favourite is these boys. SOOO UMMM will season two Come? I'm waiting, but I feel they ended it in S1

Waaaaaaah, but I was hoping for moreeeee.... Welp at least the manga is good, too. And warning spoilers alert unless u watched the series and manga both, but this is before they... oopse I almost spoiled, but u have to read the manga and the series both, OK?

Chu sangwoo was at the far end, Jaeyoung stood in his red attire as usual, trying to be a nuisance to the kid robot.

Ever since the challenge by the younger, who said he doesn't care about Jang Jaeyoung's attempt to waver him or irritate him, he felt a tingle of excitement to get back at the younger.

Jaeyoung was grinning when he sat so close to Sangwoo, who didn't make eye contact but had his robot eyes and cap close to the lecturer rather.

Jaeyoung yawned, not caring or understanding a single word, he was going to lose his mind at any rate, taking classes from subjects he didn't give a damn.

Leaning case to the computing babbles, Jaeyoung nudged Chu sangwoo in attempt to disturb him.

The younger flinched violently glaring now, for the first time bugged by this gesture. Jaeyoung was taken aback by this reaction, he frowned now...

Slowly, he reached to poke Sangwoo, who quickly secured his side without looking at him.

"Sangwoo?" He asked teasingly, now trying to find an opening to poke him. Chu sangwoo was too determined to keep his composure, as he didn't reply at all.

Jaeyoung smirked, now managing to find an opening, and then Sangwoo gasped, now almost attracting the attention of a fellow student in front.

Snickering evilly, "What's this, Sangwoo? Sensitive now, are we?"

Blushing hard, he snapped in a hissing tone, "Save your pranks after lessons! You psycho!"

"But I've never heard you laugh before..." Slowly, he pinched his waist, and Sangwoo doubled over almost bumping his knee. Luckily, no one noticed, but the girl just frowned and ignored them afterwards as she whipped her head front.

Jaeyoung couldn't help choke a laugh at that, he still had a grip on Sangwoo's waist, he wiggled his fingers now earning and jolt this time and swearing "Stohop it!"

It was music to his ears, computer mode Sangwoo honest to god giggled so ....adorably?

It was something he didn't expect from the emo boy. Oh, this is rich!

More earnestly, Jaeyoung used one hand to pull Sangwoo towards him, and the hand still gripping this knee sensitive spot on his hip.

"N-no!" Hissing harshly, Sangwoo didn't realise his sensitivity was this bad even at college. His nuna (older sister in korean) had tickled him to get things and as a weak punishment on him. He hated it, and now the most hated error is tickling him. He's an error!

"Cohome on! Cuhut it, ouhuhut!" He curled to the right where he was being assaulted.

But class was over, and it was a miracle -otherthan the girl who noticed them - that no one noticed.

Sangwoo grumbled now. "That was uncalled for!" But squeaked when Jaeyoung poked his ribs, sending the smaller one pressed on the wall covering his midriff defensively.

"It's cute... ypu should laugh more. " Jaeyoung playfully tapped his nose before leaving him, and Sangwoo felt this virus must be exterminated...by revenge.

#semantic error #semantic error tickle fic #leesangwoo #chu sangwoo #lerJaeyoung #Jang jae young #fluff and tickle #tickle fic

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soundsaboutrighttumblr · 9 months

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Semantic Error (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Chu Sangwoo/Jang Jaeyoung Characters: Chu Sangwoo (Semantic Error), Jang Jaeyoung Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Vacation, Smut, Fun, Sexy Times, Oral, Rimming, Anal Sex, Intimacy, lightheartedness, Love, sensual, sangwoo bottoming in this one, Future Fic, Jang Jaeyoung in Love Summary:

Picture: Summer in a vacation apartment somewhere on the French coast, THEM happy and together, and Sangwoo wants some good morning. Let's give him some.

POV Jang Jaeyoung.

#semantic error #fic #chu sangwoo #jang jaeyoung #vacation fic #just some lighthearted smut #i want the ocean back #still love them #give them some happy

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rhysiana · 1 year

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Winter Travel Woes #2: Jang Jaeyoung/Chu Sangwoo, Semantic Error

For @roncheg, who sent: “So, obvious one - Semantic error guys go to France)))) as for the scenario there is some kind of train mishap? Wrong stop, maybe? like the stations' names differ by one vowel and it is silent in French))))” (Alas, French is not one of my languages, so I couldn’t do that aspect of it proper justice, but someone else should totally write that scenario!)

Jaeyoung checked the board as they entered the train station and then grabbed Sangwoo’s hand. “We have to run!”

They got to their platform just as the train was pulling away.

“Shit, shit, shit!” Jaeyoung chanted under his breath. He turned to Sangwoo miserably. “I’m sorry.”

“Why? It wasn’t your fault the roads were icy and the bus was behind schedule.”

“I should have planned for it better. Had us leave the apartment earlier.”

Sangwoo studied him for a few seconds and Jaeyoung braced himself for the deserved scolding that was inevitably coming. “Is something wrong? You don’t usually care so much about being on time. Is there...” Sangwoo made a slightly pained expression, “...a surprise event you haven’t told me about?”

Jaeyoung found himself startled into a laugh. This wasn’t going at all the way he’d thought. “No, no, I promise, no surprises. I just...” He sighed and pulled off his beanie to scrub a hand through his hair in frustration. “I know how much you appreciate things sticking to a schedule, and I had the whole trip planned out, and you already came all the way to France, so this seemed like the least I could do, and now it’s already going wrong.”

Sangwoo’s expression cleared. “Oh, I see.” He reached out to pat Jaeyoung on the head before nudging him to put his hat back on. “Thank you for trying to make a plan. But the main thing I have learned about traveling is that plans can’t be relied on.”

He brought his backpack around to the front and pulled out a small notebook. “I looked up the times for the next three trains as well. It’s fine.” He flipped it open and held it out to Jaeyoung, who saw a meticulous table of all their travel connections, with the original planned time for each one highlighted in yellow, but the next three later times written underneath as well.

Sangwoo opened the pen pocket and brought out a green highlighter before zipping everything closed again. “Come on, let’s go back to the ticket office.”

This time, he was the one to take Jaeyoung’s hand.

“So I didn’t ruin your trip?”

“Of course not. The purpose of my trip was to see you.”

Jaeyoung grinned the rest of the way to the ticket office.

#winter travel woes #prompt fills #jjy/csw #jang jaeyoung #chu sangwoo #semantic error #rhys's stuff #(an important part of any fic where they're in france for me is that jjy does all the speaking to other people for csw)#(which I don't really mention here but just know that's what happens when they get to the ticket office)#(csw passed that french class but pronunciation clearly remains the worst)

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thisautistic · 2 years

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Chapters: 7/? Fandom: Semantic Error (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Chu Sangwoo/Jang Jaeyoung Characters: Ryu Jihye (Semantic Error), Go Hyeongtak, Choi Yuna (Semantic Error) Additional Tags: Coming In Pants, Neck Kissing, First Time, Grinding, Heavy Petting, Autistic Chu Sangwoo, ADHD Jang Jaeyong, Marking, Blow Jobs, Drinking, Drinking Games, realistic autistic misunderstandings, facial expressions are hard, Nipple Play Series: Part 1 of Autisic Chu Sangwoo Summary:

Chu Sangwoo is inexperienced and hypersensitive.

Jang Jaeyong is besotted.

#semantic error #update after too long #semantic error fanfiction #thisautistic fic

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boyzphantasy · 1 year

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love is a maze to me

semantic error | chu sangwoo/jang jaeyoung

rated T, 4.3k words

Sangwoo doesn’t know if it’s love that he’s feeling. In truth, he doesn’t know what he’s feeling at all. Relationships in general have always been a sort of taboo topic for him—not that he thought they were wrong or harmful, but because Sangwoo never had any time in his life for such things as dating and love in his life before. Only all of that was BJJY, or, as Sangwoo likes to put it in his timeline of life: Before Jang Jaeyoung.

[ semantic error month week 1: i love you / angst ]

#semantic error #semonth2023 #chu sangwoo x jang jaeyoung #jangchu #idk what else to tag this but anyways enjoy my brainrot for these two #they are literally so special to me i cannot explain it i love them so bad #*marrow fics

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incandescentflower · 4 months

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2023 Fic Roundup

I've been doing this for the last few years and it's been a satisfying exercise so time to take a look at my AO3 and see what I did this year for writing.

A full list of all my fic can be found here on tumblr or on my AO3. (sometimes I forget to update my tumblr list but I end up catching up eventually). I also tag posts about my fic with the incredibly creative tag "my fic."

After a few absolutely maniacal years of writing, this year slowed down. I missed it, but life and more responsibilities at work got in the way. Still, there were some satisfying accomplishments.

Words posted: 178,315

Fics posted: 14 - less than half of what I wrote last year :'(

Fics completed: 13 (still one wip nagging at me, sigh)

Fandoms written in: Cherry Magic Th, Bad Buddy, Be My Favorite, The Eclipse, My Tooth Your Love, Never Let Me Go, Our Dating Sim, Semantic Error, Word of Honor

Fandom most written in both word count and fics:

Bad Buddy with 3 fics (1 wip) and 59, 071 wc

Fic with most hits, kudos and comments: Somebody to You for Semantic Error - an arranged marriage AU

Other notable fics I wrote this year:

I finished Echoes in the Dark, a fic I started about a month after Word of Honor aired and then I was distracted by some other fandom events. It's an AU where Zhou Zishu is also kidnapped by the Ghost Valley master when he and Wen Kexing were children. There's great art for it from the wip big bang and I'm really proud of it.

I also wrote sending wishes into the sky, a fic focused on Wen Kexing's relationship with Gu Xiang and processing her death for a discord exchange that I ended up fully outlining in a few hours and finishing at warp speed because I knew exactly what I was trying to do with it.

And a few one shots for Our Dating Sim that I even feel warm and fuzzy when I read them.

Plus finally finishing the Semantic Error fic I linked above that I started in 2022.

My writing this year was dominated by thai bl shows, which is interesting since I had not written for any thai bl until Bad Buddy. But I did a few exchanges (one in bbs fandom and one in GMM fandom) so that definitely made it more likely for me to write them.

Last year I said my writing goals will be to continue to work on finding a balance between catching inspiration when it comes and keeping going when a story requires more detailed work and sustained attention. This remains a continued goal. I finally finished two long standing wips this year and I have one more to go.

Also, related, getting better at outlining longer plots. haha.

For 2024, I will finish The Triple N Project if it is the last thing I do. I would also like to write some more for Cherry Magic Thailand and go back to a reincarnation AU I started for The Devil Judge long ago.

(all stats are for fic finished in 2023 only, my 2022 and 2021 posts are here)

#2023 fic review #my fic #semantic error fic #bad buddy fic #word of honor fic

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carmenlire · 2 years

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Flex on Me

read on ao3

Sangwoo’s never been one to focus and prioritize physical appearance.

He had a very simple skincare routine that he’d researched thoroughly to both be most efficient and cost-effective. He likes knowing that whenever he reaches into his closet, his clothes have already been chosen with comfort and maximum wearability in mind– he can easily mix and match and the dark colors and muted patterns fade into the background.

Food was energy and Sangwoo ate regular meals, going so far as to set alarms during particularly busy times, to keep his body and mind running at optimal levels and because he had a tendency to forget to eat when he was so engrossed in schoolwork and other projects.

Sangwoo didn’t think he was exceptionally attractive. He didn’t think about his body or appearance at all on an aesthetic level. No one had ever expressed an opinion either way. All he knew was that his clothes were comfortable, his routine remained efficient, and his body was proficient at getting him from point A to point B.

Blackholic was his one vice. There had been one day during his freshman year when the vending machine had run out of the canned coffee. Unwilling to accept a substitute, Sangwoo had simply forgone any caffeine that day.

It was a regrettable decision.

By the time he’d made it to his afternoon Introduction to Computer Programming class, his headache had been excruciating. His temples ached and he was having trouble focusing on whatever the professor was explaining.

Sangwoo knew that he was going through caffeine withdrawal but he enjoyed the taste of Blackholic and going to the vending machine in the morning had quickly become an integral part of his morning routine. So, he accepted the consequences and moved on with his life.

Thankfully, the campus vending machine hadn’t run out of Blackholic again until– until Jang Jaeyoung had decided to launch his mission to Inconvenience Sangwoo’s Life.

It’s been months since Jaeyoung had entered Sangwoo’s life in alarming shades of red and it still surprises Sangwoo at how easily he’d become enamored with someone so completely his opposite.

Sangwoo can’t deny that his life before Jaeyoung seems rather dull in comparison to his days now. He also can’t deny that if given the choice, he’d pick now every single time– no matter how many times Jaeyoung pulls him away from his homework with the promise of kisses, no matter how many times he finds himself thinking about his boyfriend when he should be testing code.

Jaeyoung is an integral part of his routine and Sangwoo is more than happy– eager even– to intertwine their days.

He doesn’t notice it at first, distracted by his boyfriend. While his days before were routine and predictable, being in a relationship adds an element of spontaneity that Sangwoo finds he doesn’t mind.

Not at all, not even a little bit.

Jaeyoung sleeps over more nights than not. The first time he’d allowed his boyfriend to spend the night, Jaeyoung’s eyes had widened in that way they do, showing his surprise and excitement. The bed was a tight fit, Sangwoo’s twin mattress perfectly adequate for him alone but not so much for him plus his much taller boyfriend.

They’d made it work.

Thinking of that first night, Sangwoo isn’t even conscious of the smile on his face, completely unaware of the confused looks his hoobaes are giving him because Sangwoo’s life might be brighter and more fulfilling than he’d thought possible but he still reserves those feelings and displays of emotion for one person.

It’s not until a bag lands dramatically in a seat across from him, that Sangwoo startles back to the present, looking up at his boyfriend who’s already smiling down at him, eyes bright with what Sangwoo has learned is fondness.

“Sangwoo-ah, what were you thinking about,” Jaeyoung asks, sitting in the chair next to him. Sangwoo doesn’t answer right away, instead choosing to study his boyfriend.

Jaeyoung’s hair is windblown, falling into his eyes in a way that Sangwoo refuses to admit raises his resting heart rate. He’s wearing an oversized hoodie with a paint stain on the sleeve and a necklace peeks out from under the collar.

Drawing his eyes back up to his boyfriend’s face, Sangwoo distractedly catalogs the way Jaeyoung is patiently waiting for an answer while letting him look his fill. His gaze is drawn back down to Jaeyoung’s mouth and he watches as it tilts up at the corners, very taken with the way Jaeyoung’s tongue sweeps out to run along the bottom lip before biting it briefly.

Jaeyoung clears his throat.

Blinking, Sangwoo meets his boyfriend’s knowing gaze. Now that they’re in a relationship, Sangwoo had long since decided to be completely honest with Jaeyoung. The two of them had sat down after his confession on campus that night and went over expectations, one of the most important being honest and open communication.

So, Sangwoo doesn’t hesitate to admit, “I was thinking about the first time we slept together.”

Jaeyoung looks thrilled, positively scandalized, leaning closer– so close that Sangwoo feels a little breathless. “In the library, baby?”

Nodding, Sangwoo leans closer still. “You’re very warm, hyung. I sleep better with you.” He recognizes the expression that steals over Jaeyoung’s face, the softening of his brow, the quieter smile his mouth curves into.

Sangwoo hasn’t said it aloud yet, but this is his favorite look on his boyfriend. Privately, he likes to think that this is a look reserved just for him– something just for the two of them to share.

Jaeyoung opens his mouth to say something undoubtedly cheesy but Sangwoo has to add, “Even though you snore a little and sometimes drool on my shirt.”

Shifting from endeared to a look that teases dramatic outrage, Jaeyoung reaches out and pulls Sangwoo to him, resting his chin on top of Sangwoo’s head. “Ah, my beloved Sangwoo! What are these lies you’re telling about your flawless boyfriend. I’m a perfect bedmate and I certainly don’t drool.”

And this might be one of Sangwoo’s favorite parts about Jaeyoung– his playfulness, his teasing. Smiling at first, Sangwoo doesn’t try to stop the small laugh that escape him, more exhalation than anything else.

He feels Jaeyoung move a little, squeezing him lightly as his noses along his hair. Jaeyoung moves back after a moment, releasing Sangwoo.

It’s then that Sangwoo notices the small box on the table. It’s in a light pink shade, a white ribbon tied around it. Looking up at Jaeyoung, he finds his boyfriend grinning at him.

“What’s that, hyung?”

Eyes bright, Jaeyoung nudges the box over to him. “I stopped at a nearby bakery on my way over. I figured that I’d find you hard at work and thought that my Sangwoo-ah deserved a treat for studying so well.”

Sangwoo doesn’t point out that he’s spent more than his fair share of time this afternoon thinking about his boyfriend rather than his upcoming midterm. He just nods carefully and reaches out for the box.

Though he hasn’t said so out loud, he knows that Jaeyoung knows how much he enjoys receiving presents. It was probably a surprise to both of them, how affected Sangwoo is with any treat– a midmorning coffee or a miniature figure from a video game Sangwoo loves, each gesture resulting in Sangwoo looking at Jaeyoung with wide eyes, a quietly pleased smile on his face matching well with flushed cheeks.

Tilting back the lid, Sangwoo sees a single cheerful cupcake nestled in the box. It’s bright yellow with a bumblebee on top. Looking back up at his boyfriend, Sangwoo’s lips turn up faintly at the corners. “Thank you, hyung.”

Jaeyoung hums in acknowledgement, watching intently as Sangwoo picks the cupcake up, smearing frosting across his thumb in the process. Turning his attention back to the cupcake, Sangwoo considers his options.

Any way he thinks about it, it’s going to be a bit of a mess. He’s learned that it’s okay to be a little messy, though, and doesn’t think too much about it as he takes his first bite.

It’s perfect– the icing light and the cake airy with just the right amount of sweetness bursting on his tongue. He lets a little sound escape, a tiny noise of pleasure, pleased that the cupcake tastes good and that his hyung went through the trouble of bringing him something that makes him happy.

Sangwoo takes another bite, leaning into Jaeyoung’s side. His boyfriend shifts a little to make them both more comfortable and brings an arm up to wrap around his shoulders. He’s not hugely enthusiastic about blatant or overt displays of affection, but Sangwoo likes being close to Jaeyoung and often finds himself so distracted with his boyfriend that anything outside of their bubble doesn’t register.

So, he quietly sits and enjoys his cupcake while thinking idly about next steps for his project due at the end of the week. He looks up after a few moments, half the cupcake gone, and finds his boyfriend watching him in the way that makes Sangwoo feel warm.

That’s another one of his favorite things about Jaeyoung– the way his boyfriend’s gaze can cut so deep. Never hurtful, just unbelievably intimate, like Jaeyoung sees everything that makes up Sangwoo, like he wants nothing more than to know every little thing about him.

Sangwoo’s never felt so seen. He likes it.

Sangwoo doesn’t like being the center of attention but he’s come to crave the feeling of Jaeyoung’s eyes on him. Being the center of Jaeyoung’s attention is exhilarating in a way he can’t quite explain, nevermind that his vocabulary is more robust than most people his age.

Then again, most things defy rational explanation when it comes to Jang Jaeyoung.

Seeing the intensity of Jaeyoung’s stare makes something flutter low in Sangwoo’s middle, a feeling he’s grown familiar with since they started dating.

He holds the cupcake up a little as an offer. “Want some?”

Jaeyoung doesn’t say anything for a moment, continuing to look at the way Sangwoo’s slender fingers hold the cupcake. Without warning, he looks up and meets Sangwoo’s eyes for a brief moment before darting forward to kiss him right on the mouth.

It’s a quick peck but it leaves Sangwoo feeling flustered. Jaeyoung looks exceptionally pleased with himself.

“Tastes good,” Jaeyoung says, voice low and teasing. He’s smiling and while his eyes are fond, there’s just a hint of dark bite in his tone.

Rolling his eyes and not deigning to reply, Sangwoo focuses back on his cupcake. He finishes it off in a few efficient bites before taking the time to collect any crumbs. Absently crumbling his napkin, he brings his hand up to lick up a bit of frosting that had smeared over his forefinger.

If he looked over, Sangwoo would see Jaeyoung’s eyes darken at the move. His focus has already switched to the problem set he’s been trying to work through for the past few hours, though, and he’s barely aware of Jaeyoung eventually pulling out his own laptop to work on a freelance project beside him.

The two of them stay at the library until the sun’s almost set, before Jaeyoung finally relaxes back in his chair, stretching his arms over his head.

“Sangwoo-ah, are you almost finished?”

There’s the quick sound of pencil scratching against paper for another minute before it stills and Sangwoo raises his head to look at his boyfriend. “I just completed the last question.”

It’s quick work collecting their belongings before the two of them are standing and start heading towards the front entrance, Sangwoo tucked into Jaeyoung’s side with his boyfriend’s arm resting comfortably over his shoulders.

Sangwoo had planned to work on their game tonight but he already knows before they’ve left the library that this evening will be pure quality time together. They two of them have started a new show recently and while Sangwoo finds the main couple thoroughly annoying and illogical, he’s quite enjoyed getting to know the second couple and is looking forward to seeing their storyline progress.

They stop by a fried chicken place to pick up dinner on the way back to Sangwoo’s apartment and his hyung pays, wearing his signature grin as he reaches around Sangwoo to insert his credit card in the machine before Sangwoo can.

Sangwoo looks up, acting more annoyed than he really is just because it makes Jaeyoung’s smile that much more teasing. “I had it, hyung. You saw the card in my hand.”

Glancing over with wide eyes as he reaches for the bag of food, Jaeyoung tries to look innocent. “I know, baby, but I like paying. Are you going to deny me the pleasure of doing something for you?”

Sangwoo scoffs but doesn’t offer any other resistance, merely reaching for Jaeyoung’s hand and intertwining their fingers as they leave. “Relationships are fifty-fifty, hyung. It’s important that I do my part.”

Letting himself be pulled along, Jaeyoung grins, quick and bright. He squeezes Sangwoo’s hand and Sangwoo’s pulse quickens at the feeling of his boyfriend sweeping a thumb over his wrist. “Sangwoo-ah, our relationship is more than equal. You enjoying dinner is all the repayment I need.”

That doesn’t seem fair to Sangwoo but he doesn’t want to argue, not really, and Jaeyoung knows that.

Sangwoo just sighs, slowing down just enough until they’re in step again.

The walk home is pleasant, quick, full of Jaeyoung’s teasing and Sangwoo’s quiet fondness.

----

Sleep clings stubbornly to the edges of Jaeyoung’s conscious as he hears an alarm going off. He feels Sangwoo move, leaning away as he reaches for his phone to quiet the alarm. Sangwoo relaxes back into his hold just a moment later and Jaeyoung pulls him even closer.

He knows that Sangwoo’s morning routine has changed a little since they started dating. His boyfriend has reworked his schedule so that his alarm goes off earlier, giving him exactly eight minutes to cuddle with Jaeyoung before he needs to get out of bed and start his exercises.

Keeping quiet, Jaeyoung simply breathes, loves the smell of his boyfriend’s shampoo– their shampoo, because in a fit of fancy that still makes Jaeyoung thrilled to remember it, Sangwoo had casually bought the brand that he used.

When Jaeyoung had asked about it, Sangwoo’s answer had been matter of fact. “I like the way that you smell and by using the same brand, I’m able to replicate a similar feeling of comfort. Plus whenever I wear it, I think of you, which is a positive outcome.”

Nosing along Sangwoo’s hair, Jaeyoung feels something still in him. He’s always been one to enjoy his own company or a quiet moment, contrary to being well known for being the life of the party. He has many friends and enjoys a lively social life but finds just as much contentment during a dinner with Yuna and Hyeongtaek. Still, he knows that he has a fairly known reputation as larger than life.

In these moments, when it’s just him and Sangwoo, something restless settles in his chest. He loves Sangwoo– almost desperately, without limit– and just being with him means almost more than he can name.

This morning is nothing out of the ordinary. While Sangwoo is doing his exercises, Jaeyoung likes to scroll through Instagram. They’ll meet in the kitchen for a quick breakfast, talking idly about their plans for the day before Sangwoo will be off and Jaeyoung will head to the gym.

For these few minutes however, it’s just them in a bed that Jaeyoung is more frequently thinking of as theirs and he’s so warm he feels like he could burst.

Jaeyoung’s hand drifts across the hemline of Sangwoo’s sleep shirt. Sangwoo sighs, wiggling a little, infinitesimally closer. Without thinking, his hand slips under the shirt, coming to rest low on Sangwoo’s stomach.

The skin there is soft and smooth and in his sleep haze, Jaeyoung is charmed senseless. He spends the rest of their designated morning time just touching Sangwoo, enjoying the simple feel of him.

He runs a finger over his side before flattening his palm until it’s resting just over his boyfriend’s navel. He loves everything about Sangwoo– every sensible, infuriating thing about the man in his arms.

In this moment, Jaeyoung can’t get enough of how Sangwoo feels, soft and pliant. He doesn’t take for granted the trust that Sangwoo bestows on him, not only letting him into his apartment but resting so comfortable while doing so.

It makes him warm, happy and confident and so totally head over heels that he still has trouble reconciling these feelings sometimes, the way that Sangwoo’s come along and just totally blown his defenses away.

Knowing that Sangwoo’s second alarm will be sounding soon, Jaeyoung gets a bit bolder, hand coming to his boyfriend’s side, sliding his shirt up as he moves. Sangwoo’s always been lean but soft, Jaeyoung’s fingers pressing firmly into his thighs, nose warm when he kisses along Sangwoo’s stomach, nipping gently just to hear his boyfriend’s breath catch.

Jaeyoung squeezes Sangwoo’s hip, enjoys the way flesh gives under his fingers. God, he’s so warm, skin like silk just for Jaeyoung and it drives him crazy, how much he wants.

Deciding it’s time to wake up a bit more, Jaeyoung leans into Sangwoo, kissing him behind his ear.

“Good morning, baby.” His voice sounds low to him, raspy with sleep but by the way he feels Sangwoo shiver, he knows he doesn’t mind.

Sangwoo turns in his arms, cuddling closer until he’s nosing along Jaeyoung’s neck. A noise escapes Jaeyoung– not a moan but something quieter, calmer. A hum of pleasure at being so close.

He feels more than hears Sangwoo echo, “Morning, hyung.”

He lays a hand between Sangwoo’s shoulders, sweeps it low to the small of his back, feels the tiny way his boyfriend arches, just a little, into his touch, more a flex of his hips than anything else, an impression of movement.

Moving further down, Jaeyoung’s hand settles on his ass. Sangwoo hitches a leg over his hip, aligning them even more closely. Jaeyoung doesn’t think, just feels. He palms Sangwoo’s ass and it fits in his hand perfectly. He’s giving major thought to if he can persuade Sangwoo to snooze that second alarm of his when said alarm goes off and Sangwoo’s immediately reaching over again to silence it.

Jaeyoung groans, half in defeat and half because he’d been casually working himself up, not realizing how much until the prospect of following through was taken from him.

“Sangwoo-ah,” he tries, in his softest voice, teasing and low enough to make Sangwoo realize his intent. Before he can say anything else, though, his boyfriend is flinging the covers off and climbing out of bed.

Jaeyoung buries his face in their pillow, thinks about suffocating himself so that he doesn’t have to walk around frustrated all day.

“Brush you teeth, hyung. I’ll be waiting in the kitchen in twenty three minutes.”

Making some noise of acknowledgement, Jaeyoung lays still as he hears his boyfriend move through his morning routine.

He’s roused himself and made it to the kitchen with forty five seconds to spare and their breakfast is a domestic affair.

Jaeyoung hadn’t thought he’d enjoy this so much– hearing about Sangwoo’s upcoming day, debating what to do for dinner tonight, teasing his boyfriend about any little thing that crossed his mind.

He’s wildly endeared by just about everything Sangwoo does and that extends to listening as he debates the merits of switching his current brand of dish soap for one that had a better customer rating.

Sangwoo leaves soon after they finish and the rest of Jaeyoung’s day moves quickly. His workout that morning is extremely satisfying and he pushes himself hard, still riding the edge of frustration.

Jaeyoung has a few meetings later in the morning and spends the afternoon at a local coffeeshop looking up potential date ideas for this weekend when he should be drafting a loose schedule for this project he’s been assigned. He idly wonders if Sangwoo would enjoy an immersive museum exhibit when he gets a text.

Opening the message, it’s a picture of Sangwoo. His boyfriend is looking into the camera, hair damp and cheeks flushed. His expression is disgruntled

According to my weather app, there was only a fifteen percent chance of rain today. The meteorologist was clearly incorrect, as I was caught in a thunderstorm.

Jaeyoung wouldn’t even bother to deny it if anyone was there to call him out– he audibly coos at the picture, can’t help but think that Sangwoo looks like a bedraggled kitten. He saves the picture in the next breath, face aching because he’s smiling so wide down at his phone.

He sends a few texts in reply, a couple with long strings of heart emojis before sending his location, knowing that Sangwoo is done with class by now and that he had to stop by the campus bookstore for something afterwards.

Sangwoo sends a confirmation that he’s on his way now that the rain has stopped and it’s not even a conscious decision for Jaeyoung to leave his table and head up to the counter to order something.

He gets a refill for his own coffee before ordering a drink for Sangwoo. His boyfriend likes bold coffee with a bitter bite and so he orders an iced americano. Looking over the bakery selections, Jaeyoung orders a brownie, too.

Sangwoo isn’t open with it, but Jaeyoung has noticed that since they’ve started dating, his boyfriend has a definite sweet tooth. It didn’t take him long to notice, either.

It started with Jaeyoung offering Sangwoo bites of his dessert since his boyfriend insisted that he didn’t want any. What was one bite quickly turned into Sangwoo wheedling for half and then three quarters until Jaeyoung was ordering treats just for him.

It’s adorable, Jaeyoung thinks, that Sangwoo never orders his own dessert but has no qualms about devouring his.

He hasn’t really stopped to think about it, but he really enjoys treating Sangwoo. Whether it’s an extra piece of fried chicken or another mochi, it makes a kernel of warmth bloom in Jaeyoung’s chest, seeing the way his boyfriend so confidently steals bites from his fork, the trusting look in Sangwoo’s eyes as Jaeyoung feeds him, the delighted flush that steals across his cheeks as Jaeyoung surprises him with something.

Placing the brownie at the place across from him, Jaeyoung is reading an article on his phone about an up and coming video game designer when the chair across from him scrapes against the floor as it’s pulled back.

Jaeyoung looks up, instantly delighted to see that Sangwoo’s hair is still a little damp at the ends. He’s reminded of the first time he saw him like this, the night of the fight with that Quikst asshole.

“Hi, baby,” he greets with a smile, reaching up to guide a stubborn strand of hair out of his boyfriend’s eyes.

“Hey, hyung.” Sangwoo sits down and he doesn’t even say anything before he’s pulling the small plate with the brownie on it closer to him.

Jaeyoung watches him take the first bite and knows from firsthand experience that he could watch Sangwoo do just about anything indefinitely. Eating is no exception.

Sometimes, if the meal if particularly good, his boyfriend frowns a little, as though offended that he’s enjoying it so much. It’s endearing watching the way he carefully plans his next bite, each one planned so as to be the most efficient while minimizing the potential for mess.

It turns out that Sangwoo had just headed over to collect Jaeyoung and that it’s later than he’d expected, the office workers starting to congest the streets as they head home.

Having decided on sushi for dinner, the two of them get ready to head out.

Jaeyoung’s placing his laptop back in his bag when he feels arms wrap around him from behind. Though not unheard of, Sangwoo doesn’t often initiate such overt demonstrations in public. “Sangwoo-ah?”

Though his boyfriend probably wouldn’t admit it, Jaeyoung feels him nuzzle between his shoulders as the arms around him tighten for a minute before letting up. He hears Sangwoo mumble something but it’s muffled against his jacket.

Sangwoo’s backing up a moment later and at Jaeyoung’s questioning look he repeats, “Thank you for the brownie. I really liked it.”

Finding the simple thanks almost too cute to bear, Jaeyoung leans down until he’s in Sangwoo’s space. He knows that now when Jaeyoung doesn’t flinch away it’s because he likes having him in his space and not merely his stubborn boyfriend refusing to be cowed.

Jaeyoung doesn’t say anything for a few moments, content enough to just observe Sangwoo with such little distance between them. He lets his eyes wander over the few freckles that dust his cheekbones to the thin bridge of his nose, over his hair that’s a little fluffier now after having been caught in the rain. After he’s looked his fill, he leans just far enough so that he can nose against Sangwoo’s own.

His smile grows bigger when Sangwoo’s eyes widen and he looks visibly happy.

“Anytime, Sangwoo-ah.”

As they leave the coffeeshop-- Jaeyoung holding onto the handle of Sangwoo's bookbag-- and pause at the crosswalk, Jaeyoung looks over to see Sangwoo frowning. Before he can ask, Sangwoo’s already opening his mouth.

“I shouldn’t have eaten that brownie, hyung. It was illogical when we hadn’t eaten dinner yet.”

Reaching down to intertwine their fingers, Jaeyoung pulls him a little closer as he raises a brow. “Didn’t you say you liked it, though?”

Sangwoo nods as they start crossing the street. “I did but sweets are supposed to be eaten after dinner, if at all.”

“Says who?”

Narrowing his eyes in thought, Sangwoo glances up at him. “If I just ate a brownie but now we’re going to eat an actual meal, then I’ve impacted how ready I am to eat. I should prioritize a meal with the needed nutrients before splurging on something that offers little nutritional value.”

Jaeyoung shakes his head a little, amused, and huffs out a fond breath. “Sangwoo-ah, it’s okay to simply enjoy food. It doesn’t have to meet any requirements. It can simply taste good and be enjoyable.” Sangwoo looks like he wants to butt in but Jaeyoung keeps talking, adding, “It was just a brownie. I’m sure it won’t affect things as much as you think. Plus, even if you don’t eat as much– so what? We can always take some food home and you can eat it later if you get hungry.”

Sangwoo’s clearly thinking what Jaeyoung’s said over. Jaeyoung has to fight the urge to duck down and steal a kiss. His boyfriend looks so focused as he puzzles over this conundrum.

Jaeyoung simply wants to eat him up.

It’s silent while Sangwoo’s lost in thought but Jaeyoung doesn’t mind. He’s gotten used to quiet walks with Sangwoo. He enjoys just being around him, holding his hand, and it’s nice that they don’t need to fill every silence. Jaeyoung is more than happy enough to just walk beside Sangwoo on their way to the restaurant.

They’re rounding the block before Sangwoo comes up for air. “I suppose you’re right, hyung.”

Nudging his shoulder, Jaeyoung blusters. “You don’t have to make it sound like I’m never right, Sangwoo-ah. I bet I’m right as often as you are.”

Jaeyoung can see Sangwoo bite his lip in his effort not to correct him. He grins, appreciating the restraint his boyfriend is showing.

Jaeyoung opens the door for them, resting a hand on the small of Sangwoo’s back as they enter.

Sangwoo looks up, adds, “After all, there are times I’m not hungry when you get dessert but I still eat it. It sounds like the same principle.”

Sitting down as a table, Jaeyoung opens his menu as he glances up at Sangwoo. “Oh?”

Sangwoo nods. “Sometimes it just looks really good and I want to taste it.”

Jaeyoung laughs, before demanding, “So all those times you steal my dessert, you don’t even want it? You thief!”

His chest warms as he sees Sangwoo shyly look down, abashed. “But I do, hyung. That’s what I’m saying. I’m fully satiated from the meal and no longer hungry but then you order ice cream or offer me a cookie and I can’t help it– it looks good and I want some. Even though I shouldn’t since I’m not hungry. It’s illogical.”

Jaeyoung’s smile softens into a look that Yuna usually rolls her eyes at in fond disgust. “Sangwoo-ah, baby. Look at me.”

Sangwoo looks up, gaze steady as it meets his. Jaeyoung reaches over their menus for Sangwoo’s hand. “You’re allowed to be illogical, baby. You don’t have to do everything because it makes sense or is efficient. I’m happy when you steal my food. I like it when I see you enjoying something, especially when it’s something I’ve given you.”

He’s looking closely at Sangwoo so he sees the instant that the shy uncertainty melts away into joy.

“Okay, hyung. If you say so.” Sangwoo’s tone is offhand, like he doesn’t care one way or another but his boyfriend squeezes his hand and Jaeyoung sees just the hint of a smile.

The two of them enjoy their dinner. Jaeyoung brings up tentative plans for the weekend– Sangwoo is very interested in an immersive experience with him– and he helps Sangwoo work through an ethical issue his professor had brought up in class about user experience and design.

Jaeyoung’s not even paying attention as he lifts up a piece of the salmon roll to Sangwoo’s mouth, too busy listing all the reasons they should see the latest animated movie after the museum on Saturday.

It’s second nature, he takes a bite and without thought, gives the next piece to Sangwoo. It’s not until Sangwoo lifts up a hand and says, “No more, hyung,” that Jaeyoung looks down and sees what he’s been doing.

He feels a bit at a loss that he hadn’t realized that he was feeding Sangwoo. He looks back up to see Sangwoo staring at him flatly, not making a single move towards the sushi.

Jaeyoung waves his chopsticks a little, bringing them closer to Sangwoo’s mouth. “Are you sure, baby? I know this is your favorite.”

He expects Sangwoo to remain looking unimpressed and not to deign to answer. Instead, Jaeyoung’s surprised as Sangwoo leans in and takes the bite, closing his mouth over the nigiri before carefully chewing.

It’s not overt, is really barely noticeable. But Jaeyoung is once again struck by a warmth flooding his chest. He thinks it’s probably a lot of things– giving Sangwoo something, seeing him appreciate and enjoy it. His own pleasure in demonstrating his care for his boyfriend in this tangible way isn’t surprising, though he’s never experienced it before with any of his other partners.

Jaeyoung doesn’t really need to delve further and instead snags the check just as Jaeyoung reaches for it. He cuts off Sangwoo’s protests by pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. “Leave it to me, Sangwoo-ah.”

And Jaeyoung is well aware that Sangwoo doesn’t like to owe anyone anything. He’s seen how he treats debts in the past– negligent when money is owed to him but hyper-diligent when he’s the one who owes someone else.

Jaeyoung hasn’t explicitly brought it up, but he’s hoping that Sangwoo is getting the message that there’s no score in this relationship, that he doesn’t have to keep careful tally in a ledger. That, plus, in the same way that Jaeyoung enjoys seeing Sangwoo eat from his hand, he always loves treating him to a meal or outing or anything else, really.

Briefly, Jaeyoung supposes that he just likes spoiling Sangwoo.

They’re back home and ready for bed when they collapse together on the couch. Jaeyoung’s laying down, Sangwoo a warm weight over him. They’re watching the latest episode of a drama and Jaeyoung feels a little tired but not all that sleepy.

Sangwoo is definitely relaxing him. He loves feeling his boyfriend around him, over him, on him.

Jaeyoung has been told in the past that he’s not affectionate enough in his relationships. He knows that was true in the past but he wonders now if maybe he just hadn’t met the right person yet. Because while Sangwoo demonstrates his love in tiny but immeasurable ways, Jaeyoung has been more physically demonstrative from the start. He feels it rise up in him sometimes, the urge to reach out, the desire to make Sangwoo feel him and the sheer amount of feelings that coalesce in his chest for him.

It doesn’t take much to distract Jaeyoung from this episode. It seems to be mostly focused on a side plot, anyway, and he’s not that invested in it. No, instead, he finds himself reaching for his boyfriend– who remains totally glued to the laptop, eyes focused on the screen and not paying any attention at all to whatever Jaeyoung wants to do.

Letting his hands roam over Sangwoo’s back, Jaeyoung feels the way he melts a little further into him, pressing him firmly into the couch. He quickly tires of just feeling him over his clothes, though, and reaches under Sangwoo’s shirt to touch the smooth expanse of skin.

Stilling his fingers as he feels Sangwoo tense, Jaeyoung hums a little as his boyfriend merely adjusts, shifting until he’s straddling Jaeyoung, thighs on either side of his hips, head resting comfortably on Jaeyoung’s chest as his attention never falters from the show.

Taking that as further permission to do whatever he wishes, Jaeyoung’s hands land on Sangwoo’s thighs. His boyfriend radiates warmth and Jaeyoung gives up all pretense of following along, instead losing himself in the feel of his boyfriend.

He rubs his palms down the outside of his thighs in broad strokes, pauses only to squeeze gently at the flesh. Sangwoo feels so good in his hands, so solid and real.

Feeling the slight give of his hips, as he brings his hands up, Jaeyoung swallows a noise building in the back of his throat, knowing not to try to pull Sangwoo’s attention until the episode is over.

Jaeyoung contents himself with feeling his boyfriend up for the remaining minutes of the episode– hands roving over his back, squeezing his ass before moving back to his hips. He’s just hearing the opening notes of the drama’s credits music when Sangwoo starts moving.

He leans up suddenly over Jaeyoung and Jaeyoung loves this too– he’s usually towering over Sangwoo but being on the flipside makes him hot in a different way.

Placing his hands on either side of Jaeyoung’s head, Sangwoo asks, “Were you trying to distract me?”

Jaeyoung gives his best innocent look, wide eyes that he knows makes Sangwoo weak. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Shaking his head a little– to clear it, Jaeyoung thinks smugly– Sangwoo frowns down at him. He’s gotten much better in the months they’ve been dating at telling when Sangwoo is genuinely annoyed, however, and this look does nothing but make Jaeyoung want to play more.

He grabs Sangwoo’s hips, thumbs digging in just a little and is rewarded with a hitching breath.

As he looks up at his boyfriend, Jaeyoung’s struck with how cute he is. It feels like Sangwoo gets cuter every day and he can’t get enough.

Still, something seems a little different now, today. The apartment is quiet, the last of the show playing out as Jaeyoung and Sangwoo study each other.

Jaeyoung takes great pride in knowing Sangwoo. He loves watching him, whether he’s sleeping or playing video games or grocery shopping. He figures that he probably looks at Sangwoo more than anyone else.

It’s not until now, though, that an idea starts to form in his head. His eyes scan over the curve of Sangwoo’s cheeks, and he takes his time dragging his hands from Sangwoo’s knees up his thighs. One hand comes to rest on his boyfriend’s ass, the other inches up until his shirt until Jaeyoung can draw an aimless pattern on his side, over his stomach.

It seems obvious now that he’s thinking about it, that Sangwoo's gained some weight since they started dating. It’s hardly anything, barely noticeable, and only now so because Jaeyoung’s so intimately acquainted with his boyfriend’s body.

Jaeyoung thinks, as he always does, that his boyfriend is cute as shit.

Reaching up to gently grab Sangwoo’s chin, he guides his boyfriend down into a kiss. It starts soft and sweet. Sangwoo’s lips are achingly plush and Jaeyoung’s lost more than one evening kissing his boyfriend silly.

Jaeyoung’s distracted with his realization, though. He knows it makes sense. He's heard about it before, relationship weight gain. Something sparks in him because it supposedly only happens when someone feels happy in a relationship, secure and comfortable. To see evidence that Sangwoo feels like that with him creates a chain reaction in Jaeyoung. Because sure, Jaeyoung is an ace at reading his boyfriend and Sangwoo, now that they're in a relationship, never hesitates to let Jaeyoung know what he's thinking, but it feels different to feel it so tangibly, to see it with his own eyes in a new way.

He knows there's more at play, too. Sangwoo’s diet is more varied now that they’re dating– Jaeyoung likes to try different restaurants and Sangwoo has realized that he likes trying new foods. Jaeyoung acknowledges his tendency to dote on Sangwoo has definitely played a part.

Their kisses grow deeper and Jaeyoung gasps when Sangwoo’s suddenly pulling back, just to start mouthing along his neck. His boyfriend settles against him, hips pressing firmly down and when they align just as Sangwoo bites down, Jaeyoung's eyes roll back at pleasure sparks up his spine.

His thoughts fragment into a million pieces. All he can focus on is the visceral feel of Sangwoo against him, moving in a way that ought to be illegal as he comes back up to his mouth.

The only thing in his head is how much he loves Sangwoo and how much he wants him, all the time, any way he can him him.

----

Sangwoo looks up at the mirror, frowning at his reflection before he looks back down to where he was buttoning his jeans.

Or at least he’d planned to but it looks like that is no longer possible.

He wonders for a brief moment, if he’d messed up last week’s laundry but he didn’t deviate from his standard process so he knows that can’t be it.

Looking back up at the mirror, he’s confused all over again. It’s not that the jeans don’t necessarily fit, they’re just tighter than he’s used to. This has never happened before and as he considers his options, he supposes that he’d been distracted enough recently not to have noticed that as his days changed, there would be expected outcomes.

Sangwoo can admit that before Jaeyoung, his diet rarely strayed from the familiar and routine. He had breakfast, ate lunch at the cafeteria on campus, and dinner was usually a quiet affair with ramyeon at home or a quick fried rice with banchan.

Besides his prized Blackholic, or his weekend trips to a cafe in the next neighborhood, Sangwoo planned his meals for their simplicity and overall nutritional value.

He didn’t have much time between classes and projects and he didn’t want to spend his free time in the kitchen or dining at restaurants. He was competent enough at a few staple recipes– and in the winters, he found the relaxing routine of making kimchi jjigae or, on particularly cold weekend mornings Jjinppang with red bean paste, enjoyable.

Still, Sangwoo had always ascribed food as fuel. His mother vehemently disagreed whenever he visited home– she would always send him back to his apartment with loads of food– but Sangwoo liked his life as simple and predictable as possible and that meant food was no fuss, no frills.

Then along came Jaeyoung.

As the annoying senior wriggled his way into Sangwoo’s life, his routines were carelessly ruffled. As Sangwoo fell for Jaeyoung and allowed himself to enjoy all the ways their lives intertwined, he found a new appreciation for being– well for being spoiled, he supposed.

Jaeyoung was an affectionate, attentive boyfriend. Sangwoo still remembers the jolt of surprise and pleasure when Jaeyoung had handed him that ugly ass cake for his birthday. Even though the circumstances surrounding it were less than ideal, he couldn’t deny the glowing warmth in his chest when he’d realized that not only had Jaeyoung noticed when his birthday was, but he’d gone out of his way to get him something.

And while Sangwoo tries to reciprocate in his own ways and makes a concerted effort to give too– he’s come to enjoy Jaeyoung’s flustered smile when he catches him off guard with a coffee at the studio on late nights, or the happy smile when he sends his boyfriend off for his day with lunch packed– Sangwoo has let himself enjoy being on the receiving end of such kind, thoughtful gestures.

It helps that he has an unabashed sweet tooth.

He’d mostly ignored it, except for his weekly jaunt to that bakery on Sunday mornings, but Jaeyoung had brought it roaring back to the forefront. It seems like every time he turned around, Sangwoo was being surprised with a treat. Each time, Jaeyoung waved his thanks away but it really does mean a lot– and truth be told, is something that seems to have worked its way into Sangwoo’s routine.

That, along with the two of them wandering around Seoul on dates, had surely wreaked havoc with Sangwoo’s careful and consistent meals.

As he studies himself in the mirror, Sangwoo knows that the handful of kilos he’s gained is an accurate reflection of his new lifestyle.

Tugging his pants off and putting them away, instead reaching for a different pair, Sangwoo thinks over this new change.

In truth, he hadn’t realized because he’s been so busy with everything else going on– his first relationship is a lot of time and effort. Jaeyoung himself is a distraction of the best kind, Sangwoo knows. Add to the fact that his courseload this semester is more intense and he’s been busy working with his boyfriend on Veggie Venturer, and it’s no wonder that he hadn’t cataloged the changes and their impact.

Finishing getting dressed, Sangwoo goes into the kitchen. He washes his hands and starts preparing his simple breakfast– a couple of eggs with rice.

Sangwoo’s found that while some things in his routine are now permanently less predictable, he still greatly enjoys maintaining a routine when he can. As such, he eats the same breakfast every morning before heading to campus.

Jaeyoung’s often with him, but this morning his boyfriend had been out of the apartment early in the morning to meet for a group project. Sangwoo plans to meet him at the coffeeshop he’s camping out at sometime in the afternoon after his statistics class ends.

Making breakfast, his thoughts are pulled back to this morning’s realization.

He wonders if he should feel more about it than he does. It doesn’t really make a difference to him– he’d only noticed because his pants fit a little differently this morning. They aren’t a favorite pair of his, Sangwoo idly considers as he pours the eggs into the heated pan. He doesn’t mind discarding them since they had shrunk a fair bit during their first wash because he hadn’t accounted for the specific material blend.

Otherwise, the weight doesn’t really matter. He is still able to get from point A to point B. His mind is still sharp and able to solve problems in a timely, methodical manner.

Sangwoo very quickly comes to the conclusion that if everything remains in a similar state but the only changes are that he can enjoy quality time with Jaeyoung and he gets to eat fun, frivolous foods on a more regular basis, then he really has no reason to complain or alter the way he spends his days.

That issue settled with a minimum of fuss, Sangwoo finishes his breakfast and quickly washes the dishes he’d used, heading off to campus with a first stop at his preferred vending machine.

It’s hours later and Sangwoo is standing outside of his last class. The class before his must be taking an exam because the room’s still half-full and the door is closed.

Wanting to read a quick article about an actress from the current drama he’s watching with Jaeyoung– the headline mentions that she’ll be doing voice work for an animated series next– Sangwoo’s thumbs stall on the Naver search page.

His thoughts circle back around to the thoughts from this morning. Curious, he instead searches for information on gaining weight when in a relationship. Sangwoo wonders if it’s a situation unique to him or if it’s a usual occurrence.

Scrolling through the first page of results, several of the article titles surprise him. Almost the entirety of the first page seems to center around gaining weight during a new relationship– and wanting to lose it?

Sangwoo’s never thought about his weight one way or another. His height and weight increased with each growth spurt and then had settled the summer before he started college. It’s been a few years now at the same weight and he had no opinions on it. He knew what size clothes to buy and that was it.

He also can’t say that weight is something he really notices about others, either. He tries to ignore most people and the classmates he has formed tentative friendships with are important to him because of their personality or their skill in the computer science program.

Weight’s never been a priority, not something that he’d given more thought to than his height or shoe size.

But now that he’s clicking into a few of the articles and starts skimming through their contents, he starts to wonder if he should be worrying more about these few kilos.

Most of the headlines talk about wanting to reverse the weight gain because they strongly dislike it– Sangwoo’s brow twitches into a frown as he sees one person in particular worry that his partner will no longer find him attractive.

Well, that’s something Sangwoo hadn’t considered.

He knows that he’s only gained a little weight– he himself had just noticed this morning after all. Still, it hadn’t crossed his mind that his boyfriend would care one way or another.

As he reads through this article, though, it seems like the person’s worry rubs off on him. He supposes that the anxiety makes sense. Sangwoo had started dating Jaeyoung looking one particular way and if that way changed, it wasn’t completely illogical for Jaeyoung’s feelings about him and his body to change, too.

That leaves Sangwoo feeling much more nervous than he’d been this morning. He doesn’t mind the way his body looks as long as it continues to function in an optimal state.

He thinks that would change, though, if Jaeyoung wasn’t as attracted to him.

Frowning down at his phone, Sangwoo doesn’t notice the classroom has emptied out and he’s the last one standing outside. He doesn’t notice until the professor– who was brilliant but always tardy– comes striding down the hallway and greets him.

Sangwoo hurries to take his seat, aligning everything neatly in his usual spot. He opens his notebook to take notes but is quickly distracted by his revelation just a few moments ago.

He spends the next two hours working through this new puzzle. He considers his options, looking through the whiteboard at the front of the classroom without taking anything in, pen lax in his hand.

There’s a large piece of Sangwoo that still doesn’t think his weight should matter in a relationship. As long as there are no problems, then his body is his to do with as he pleases.

But there’s still that part of him that doesn’t want to do anything to make Jaeyoung less– well, less in love with him, Sangwoo admits.

This might be Sangwoo’s first relationship but he can’t imagine wanting anyone else as much as he does Jaeyoung. It seems foolish to do anything to jeopardize that.

If Jaeyoung doesn’t like that his thighs are a bit softer or that his stomach isn’t as flat then does Sangwoo have an obligation to return to the state that Jaeyoung does like?

Quickly opening a new tab, Sangwoo searches for ways to lose weight. He is immediately filled with dread. He’s never been a physically active person– he abhorred physical education in school and doesn’t have a gym membership. His morning exercises are more to wake up than anything else. He enjoys walking and likes riding his bike but that’s it.

The next logical step would be to give up all of the foods that he’s gotten used to lately, which also fills Sangwoo with dread and a sliver of annoyance.

He likes being able to eat Jaeyoung’s treats– he likes his boyfriend teasing him about stealing his dessert and he enjoys sweets after a meal.

In the course of a class, Sangwoo turns this unexpected dilemma around and examines all the angles. It’s probably the least he’s ever paid attention to a class– with the few notable exceptions of when Jaeyoung had first started his little mission– but by the end, Sangwoo is filled with resolved.

Sangwoo likes how he is now and he likes what he has with Jaeyoung. If his boyfriend has a problem with that then that is none of his concern. After all, Sangwoo dryly thinks, it’s his fault in the first place.

Feeling confident in his decision, Sangwoo heads to the coffeeshop Jaeyoung had texted him earlier. It’s a little further from campus but it’s a sunny day so Sangwoo enjoys the bike ride, especially since there’s little traffic today.

By the time that Sangwoo gets to the coffeeshop, the rest of Jaeyoung’s project members have left and his boyfriend has moved to a smaller table by the front window. Walking in, Sangwoo immediately sees him and he revels in the little flutter in his chest at getting to observe his very attractive boyfriend.

Jaeyoung’s wearing his glasses, so focused on his laptop that he doesn’t see Sangwoo. So, Sangwoo takes the opportunity to study him from his place by the front door.

Sangwoo was surprised at how much he enjoys this, just looking at his boyfriend. He’s lost a lot of time in the mornings or at night or simply walking around their neighborhood, observing Jaeyoung. It’s a view that never gets old.

Finally ready to interrupt his boyfriend’s focus, Sangwoo heads over to the table, placing his bookbag over the back of his chair. Sitting down across from Jaeyoung, his eyes immediately catch on the mismatched plate before him.

It’s been placed squarely on his side of the table. On the plate is a chocolate croissant. The edges are golden brown and the chocolate still looks a little warm and gooey. Sangwoo’s mouth waters a bit in anticipation.

The thoughts of the day come back, though, and he’s hesitant to reach for it. Sangwoo spares a moment to think that Jaeyoung must not have noticed anything different about him, if he’s continuing to dote on him like this.

Unsure, he doesn’t notice that his boyfriend is watching him with that look in his eye– the one that’s filled with fondness and amusement and love.

“Sangwoo-ah, what did that poor croissant ever do to you, to have you glaring at it like that?” Jaeyoung’s voice is full of laughter and when Sangwoo looks up, the warmth in his eyes is familiar and echoes in his own chest.

Sangwoo just blinks at him. “Did you buy this for me?”

Raising a brow, Jaeyoung leans over the table. It’s infuriating that he looks even better up close. He nods decisively. “I did.” He starts frowning. “If anyone else starts buying you pastries, let me know, okay? That’s something only I, Jang Jaeyoung, have the privilege of doing.”

“Yes, hyung,” Sangwoo dutifully agrees.

Looking between the croissant and Jaeyoung a few times, Sangwoo remembers his resolve from earlier and says a mental fuck it. He reaches for the pastry.

The first bite tastes amazing, the bitter chocolate and buttery dough almost instantly waking him up a little from where he’d wilted in the late afternoon stretch. He takes another bite before looking back up at Jaeyoung.

His boyfriend is watching him with a satisfied grin on his face, resting his head on his hand. He looks like there’s no place else he’d rather be than watching Sangwoo eat this croissant.

“Aigoo, my Sangwoo-ah is so cute,” Jaeyoung coos. Sangwoo swallows just as Jaeyoung reaches out and pinches his cheek a little. “I’m so lucky, having a boyfriend that’s so sweet.”

Used to his boyfriend’s antics, Sangwoo still can’t help his smile at hearing his boyfriend’s words.

Deflecting, Sangwoo takes another bite of the croissant. The next few moments are spent quietly- Sangwoo eating and Jaeyoung studying him with the kind of interest that he thinks should be reserved for pieces in museums or especially creative code.

Done with the croissant, Sangwoo snags a napkin from the table. He’s startled when Jaeyoung moves, deftly sweeping a thumb across the corner of his lips. When his boyfriend pulls his hand back, he instantly pops it into his own mouth.

Sangwoo just looks at him. Jaeyoung grins back, winking.

“You had some chocolate there,” he explains, gesturing to his own mouth. He raises his eyebrows as if in a challenge– what else could I be expected to do?

Their conversation quickly picks up from there. Sangwoo loves talking to Jaeyoung. He never would have imagine during those first few days, but conversations with Jaeyoung are stimulating, totally engrossing.

It’s one of Sangwoo’s favorite parts of their relationship. His hyung is wicked smart and his wit is sharp as hell. Sangwoo has lost count of the many times that Jaeyoung has made him consider a different side to a debate or the times he's walked away from a discussion learning something new. Talking with his boyfriend can meander through several topics all in the course of a single sitting.

There aren't many people who can keep up with Sangwoo, or retain his attention. Since almost the beginning, Jaeyoung has been totally captivating. Sangwoo’s prone to thinking that he could listen to Jaeyoung talk for hours uninterrupted- and has on a few occasions, when he needs to talk through a prospective assignment or when he lands on a impassioned diatribe about visual design in different mediums.

Their discussion flows for the next few hours as they grab dinner at a local restaurant that had quickly become one of their favorites. Jaeyoung’s in the middle of dramatically defending his stance that he looks good in every color but especially red when he starts absently plucking his own radish onto Sangwoo’s plate.

Not for the first time, Sangwoo notices that his boyfriend is habitually trying to feed him. He knows that’s just one part of how Jaeyoung cares for him. He’d stumbled across a very interesting website on love languages back in the early days of their relationship and had walked away knowing that Jaeyoung seemed to possess all of them.

His boyfriend has never been shy in complimenting Sangwoo, praising his abilities and teasing him in a way that only he’s allowed. They spend much of their free time together and Sangwoo enjoys how tactile his boyfriend is– whether it’s having sex or a simple arm across his shoulder as they walk down the block, Jaeyoung really enjoys feeling Sangwoo.

Sangwoo feels the same, though he’d been more hesitant at first to initiate such contact. It helps that Jaeyoung always looks so pleased about it, happy and wondrous and excited whenever Sangwoo reaches out first.

Still, this is a daily occurrence in their relationship. Jaeyoung’s always doing this and doesn’t even seem to realize.

“Hyung,” Sangwoo breaks through, gesturing with his chopsticks to the small pile of radish on his plate. “Stop giving me your vegetables.”

Jaeyoung looks surprised for a moment before he just smiles and deliberately places the last piece right on top of the little tower. “Eat well, baby. Vegetables have those nutrients you love.”

Sangwoo just looks at him and it’s hard not to smile too, when Jaeyoung huffs out a fond laugh, looking away sheepishly.

“Well, what do you expect from me,” he blusters, tone defensive. “You’re my boyfriend– I’m the hyung! I’m just doing what I’m supposed to. I get full just from watching you eat, Sangwoo-ah.”

Sangwoo narrows his eyes a little before his shoulders slump in defeat. He sighs and reaches for the piece on top.

He refuses to acknowledge Jaeyoung’s smug look.

Dinner is pleasant, as it always is when it’s just the two of them. Sangwoo likes eating with their friends, too, but there’s something special about having this time to spend just with his boyfriend that makes it all the better.

They stop by a stationary store afterwards because Jaeyoung needs some supplies and pop into the corner mart to pick up a few odd and end groceries.

It’s all so delightfully domestic and Sangwoo enjoys this part of their routine a lot. He finds grocery shopping much more fun with Jaeyoung, even if it’s not as efficient.

When it’s just him, he has a list and knows exactly where to go. He doesn’t deviate, nothing catches his eye.

When he’s with Jaeyoung, however, his boyfriend likes to browse. He’ll pull Sangwoo along as they walk along the beverage coolers or examine the produce to see if anything looks particularly good.

Jaeyoung likes to drape himself over Sangwoo’s back when they do this, wrapping his arms around his middle. Together, they’ll shuffle down the aisle. There’s no real purpose to it, not when they don’t need whatever they’re looking at, but it’s a few moments of them enjoying each other’s company and that is extremely enjoyable for Sangwoo.

Jaeyoung has a habit of reading tabloid headlines out loud when they’re at the checkout line, trying to annoy Sangwoo with his disbelief or scandalized tone.

Sangwoo bears it silently, as always, though the fond look in his eye betrays him."

The walk back to Sangwoo’s apartment is quiet. Their last topic had dwindled to an end and Sangwoo didn’t feel a particularly need to initiate another. While he loves talking to Jaeyoung, silence is also something he looks forward to when it’s shared with him.

It had been a bit surprising at first, that his boyfriend could enjoy the quiet just as much as him. For all that Jaeyoung had done his level best to irritate the shit out of him– never shutting up, being all around loud and present– that very first time Sangwoo had allowed him into his place had gone differently than he’d figured.

Having Jaeyoung assure him that he was simply messaging his friends, the moment where they’d just looked at each other– the silence had been deafening.

When Sangwoo had tended to the cut on his arm, he’d been overly conscious of the way his heart was beating in his chest, the way his breath wasn’t quite as steady as it should have been.

When they’d started working together at Jaeyoung’s studio, seeing his hyung sleeping was an arresting sight. He looked so peaceful, so far from the menace he was whenever he was awake.

And now that they’re together, they both have shared how much they appreciate that they can enjoy the silences with each other. Jaeyoung likes having a quiet place he can crash away from his life outside and Sangwoo– well, Sangwoo just likes that his prized time at home isn’t interrupted by the presence of someone else. No, instead it’s nice to share it with someone.

Not to say that Sangwoo doesn’t still need time completely to himself, but it doesn’t happen quite as much as he’d thought it would.

They’re both in bed now, pajamas on and teeth freshly brushed. While Jaeyoung doesn’t spend every night with Sangwoo, it happens often enough that Sangwoo’s started to think of it as their place in his head.

He’s already putting together a PowerPoint for why they should live together, ready to present it in a couple of months so that they have ample time to find an apartment that can accommodate them both before their respective leases are up.

Sangwoo’s a little more tired than usual. He thinks that he used up too much energy focused on his dilemma earlier.

Now that they’re home, Sangwoo finds himself relaxing completely into Jaeyoung.

His boyfriend is watching an episode of his favorite anime on his phone above him. Sangwoo feels the steady beat of his heart underneath him and it’s comforting, fills him completely with warmth.

He’s quiet, listening idly to the episode as he works through the question that’s been on his mind earlier. After most of the episode has passed by– and Sangwoo has smiled to himself at least three times, feeling his boyfriend laugh under him– he comes to the conclusion that this is something that requires open and honest communication.

Sangwoo told Jaeyoung once that people need to let go of unnecessary things, lest they stop working optimally. He doesn’t want this to be something that drags him down.

So, when the episode finishes, Sangwoo clears his throat.

Lowering his phone, Jaeyoung looks down at him with a small smile, humming to let him know he’s listening.

“I want to talk to you about something, hyung.”

Immediately looking more alert, Jaeyoung sits up a bit more. “What is it, Sangwoo-ah?”

Sangwoo keeps it short and sweet and while he doesn’t outwardly betray his emotion, something in him lightens considerably at the way his boyfriend’s eyes instantly widen in surprised alarm as he starts laying out his thoughts.

Ending things with, “And I’ve decided that I don’t care about a handful of kilos. However, I’ve read online that a romantic or sexual partner might and I wanted to know your opinion.”

Sangwoo doesn’t mention his resolve earlier, that he doesn’t care what Jaeyoung thinks. The truth is, it’s a tiny kernel of worry that he hasn’t been able to squash and he does want to know.

The first thing Jaeyoung does is take his face in his hands and kiss him, long and hard, until Sangwoo’s breathless. He’s caught so off guard, that he doesn’t even try to tamp down on the noise that escapes him– a bitten off moan, a hint of a whine when Jaeyoung eventually pulls away.

Jaeyoung rolls them over until he’s the one leaning over Sangwoo. Caged in like this, Sangwoo feels surrounded. Jaeyoung is so much bigger than him, that it’s easy to feel small. It’s a feeling Jaeyoung likes and it sets another part of him at ease.

“Sangwoo-ah, baby,” Jaeyoung starts, voice quiet but eyes so intense that Sangwoo wants to look away but he’s caught. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too, hyung,” Sangwoo assures him, mouth tipped up in just the suggestion of a smile.

Jaeyoung’s eyes brighten. He shifts a little, letting a bit more of his weight settle into Sangwoo. It’s not uncomfortable– quite the opposite, in fact. One of Sangwoo’s favorite feelings is being pressed into the nearest surface by Jaeyoung. It makes him feel safe, lets him focus on nothing else except the man in front of him.

Sangwoo studies Jaeyoung’s face in the muted light of their bedroom. His gaze drops to his boyfriend’s mouth, always so expressive, and catches on the way Jaeyoung bites his lip.

It’s a sure sign that he’s thinking through what he wants to say, taking his time to make sure there’s no misunderstanding between them.

“I love your mind and your personality and the way you roll your eyes when I tease you– and yeah, I love your body too, baby. But I love it because it’s yours. That’s it. Nothing else. So if you’re asking if I’m still insanely into you and want you all the time, then the answer is yes– and that’ll never change, not as long as you want me.”

Sangwoo opens his mouth to offer a counterargument but Jaeyoung stops him in his tracks. First by shaking his head to stave him off, and then leaning down to kiss him, quicker than a moment ago but dirtier, filled with Jaeyoung’s undying want.

Jaeyoung smiles a little at the way Sangwoo looks up at him after, eyes slowly blinking open and quietly pleased. His boyfriend looks dazed, one of Jaeyoung’s favorite looks on him– his smartass boyfriend, brought down by a kiss.

God, he’s so cute.

Jaeyoung doesn’t let himself look as long as he wants. Instead, he leans back down, slower this time just to hear the way Sangwoo’s breath hitches. He angles his face at the last moment, though, and noses along Sangwoo’s cheek.

“I love you like this.” He nibbles along Sangwoo’s jaw, kisses him under his ear. “Love you any way I can have you.”

Jaeyoung groans a little and can’t help but laugh softly too, because he’s so gone on the man under him and it’s ridiculous, how much he feels right now. He can’t believe that his Sangwoo would have these kinds of thoughts but he swears to himself that today will be the only day, that he’ll make sure Sangwoo doesn’t have a single doubt about how Jaeyoung feels about him by the time he falls asleep tonight.

One of Jaeyoung’s hands sweep down his boyfriend’s side. It comes to rest under his shirt– Jaeyoung’s, because Sangwoo likes to sleep in oversized clothes, and hadn’t that thrown him for a fucking loop the first time he’d come out of the bathroom just to see Sangwoo swimming in one of his favorite band shirts– his fingers flexing over the soft, warm skin of his hip.

“I told you before that I like seeing you enjoy yourself. It makes me happy knowing that you like what I give you and I like taking care of you in this way. I promise you, Sangwoo-ah, I love everything about you and that most definitely includes your body any way it comes.”

Sangwoo feels warm, verging on hot, under the onslaught of attention from Jaeyoung.

The words are short, leaving no room for misinterpretation.

Sangwoo loves the way that Jaeyoung can cut through the bullshit– he knows exactly what to say to him, how to say it, too.

Direct and honest communication doesn’t have to be hard, Sangwoo knows. It’s rare to find someone else who knows how to, though. For the hundredth time, he’s glad that he has Jaeyoung.

“Thank you, hyung,” Sangwoo whispers, more breath than words.

Against where he’s kissing a line down his neck, Sangwoo feels Jaeyoung shake his head. “Never thank me for this, Sangwoo-ah. And if I ever do anything to make you unsure, I want you to kick my ass, okay?”

He comes back up to meet Sangwoo’s eyes for the last part, his own gaze fever bright and his grin devilish.

Sangwoo loves it, loves him.

He nods a little, words getting caught in his throat. It’s okay, though, because Jaeyoung just continues roaming around his body, hand squeezing his thigh rough enough to make Sangwoo gasp– in direct contrast to the way he lays a kiss on the high of his cheekbone, featherlight.

Jaeyoung’s breath is warm against his ear as he takes the lobe between his teeth, nibbling sweetly.

In the next moment– and Sangwoo is easily overwhelmed by Jaeyoung when he’s like this, loves that his brain just turns off and he’s left just to feel– his boyfriend hitches his leg high on his hip.

They fit together well, Sangwoo thinks, flush traveling down his chest at the heat banked under his skin.

“What would you say if I told you that I think you’re even cuter like this, baby? Just when I think you can’t get any more perfect, I wake up the next morning to see I was wrong, again. Every day, Sangwoo-ah.”

Jaeyoung’s voice is low in his ear, rough. A shiver snakes up Sangwoo’s spine, hearing how affected Jaeyoung is over him. It’s undeniably sexy, the way Jaeyoung doesn’t hide how Sangwoo makes him feel.

In fact, Jaeyoung’s shameless when it’s just the two of them. Sangwoo starts to think that he was silly for even entertaining the idea that his boyfriend didn’t find him desirable.

Any remaining tension leaves Sangwoo as the last shred of his uncertainty ebbs away. He arches into Jaeyoung, tightening his thigh to pull them closer together.

“Fuck,” Jaeyoung rasps under his breath and he huffs out a laugh, so turned on and desperate for it. “You drive me fucking crazy, Sangwoo-ah.”

A tiny laugh escapes Sangwoo– pleased that he can have such an effect on Jaeyoung.

His laughter soon turns into a moan though, as Jaeyoung’s hand drifts lower.

Then it’s Jaeyoung’s turn to laugh in his ear, wicked and fond, as he spends most of the night backing up his words with action.

The next morning, Sangwoo is late walking into class for an entirely different reason. He hears his classmates whispering to themselves when he walks in behind the professor, unable to stop the small smile from curving along his mouth. As always, his boyfriend is to blame for his lack of punctuality.

Still, he’s glad that Jaeyoung’s hoodie covers up the most blatant of the marks.

#!!!! it's here!#my first jangchu fic #i can't believe i wrote all this in two days #it was so much fun! just writing this pure fluff #i love them so much #can't believe i've been in the fandom less than two weeks and have already written something #this is by far the fastest i've ever gone in #i hope anyone who reads this enjoys it <3 #flex on me #my writing #semantic error #jangchu #jangchu fic #jaeyoung x sangwoo #semantic error fic

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