This was originally a reblog, but it felt important enough to me that I wanted to make it it's own post.
I have mentioned before how Fabian feels like a representation of some parts of the black experience, and Riz feels like another.
Riz has always felt black coded to me because of how much harder he has to work to be viewed as equal and worthy. How disrespected goblins are in the FH universe, I think about that pirate that threatened him while they were in leviathan all the time. Riz has to be perfect all the time because if he isn't, he'll be viewed as nothing. Everything he has ever done and all the work he has ever put into the things he loves will mean fucking nothing.
Watching Riz and Sklonda interact sometimes feels like watching conversations with elders in our community telling us telling that we can't be mediocre. We can't be anything but the best. We can't be messy, or scrappy, or frumpy, or unprepared, because every black individual is the face of the black community when we go out into the world.
We're not allowed to have awkward phases because it will make the community look bad. The amount of pressure we live under from the moment the world stops viewing us as kids, even before then honestly, is fucking immense and there is no room for slipups.
I relate to Riz so much and I headcaonned him and Sklonda as black from their first appearance because I saw myself and my own family in them.
I love DND so much because of the stories it allows us to tell, because of the experiences we get to share that people might not see otherwise. I just think that's really beautiful.
This is also the third time a white man has done a portrayal of a character that feels so fucking true to the black experience, without even trying and I think that's hilarious.
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i love when riz acts like a cat. his tail going between his legs when hes sad. clawing at things around him. sneaking around in the shadows. hissing or growling at people. getting territorial over his friends (esp fabian). eating trash. his ears displaying his emotions. being super perceptive and curious, to a fault. his sharp teeth and sharper gaze.
and the fact kalina is a cat only makes it better. like he grew up without her in his life and he still acts like she does. hes just as much like her as he is like his father and mother. she will always be a part of him.
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Riz Gukgak Junior Year Playlist: side A
Heres the first side of the Junior Year Riz Playlist and the explanations down below, Spoilers for Episodes 1-10 in FHJY
Genres: Alternative, Anti Folk, Math Rock, Punk
1. Photosynthesis, They Might Be Giants
Photosynthesis does not involve a camera
Or a synthesizer
Although that's interesting, too
Photosynthesis is how plants take in light
From the sun and turn it into energy
It's actually a thing on which most life depends
Here on the planet Earth
GOD so when I'm not making these playlists I'm and environmental educator and when Brian was like "we're the photosythe-KIDS!" i nearly lost it. Gotta let this little nerdy kid have at least one nerd song as a treat to me
2. Dissonance, AJJ
My feet planted in different realities
I've been doing lots of parallel planning and asking
Does morals exist anymore?
Wondering if society's all broken down yet
I should probably know
I should probably know
I should probably grow some more plants in the window
I should probably try
I should probably try
I should probably try to find a cure for this dissonance
One of the things I relate to Riz about the most is the way in which he is so hungry for explanation and, specifically problem solving. When they get dropped right back into normal teen life after having just saved the world and "cracked the case", Riz had to really switch into school mode fast (with the whole paying for college thing)
3. Stress, Jim's Big Ego
I'm addicted to stress
That's the way that I get things done
If I'm not under pressure then I sleep too long
And I hang around like a bum
I think I'm going nowhere, and that makes me nervous
Everybody's out to get me, but I feel all right
Obsessed with the way that, if Brennan didn't let Riz take on the stress of other people in the party, he would literally be so normal about the downtime system. God help him and his nervous system.
4. Travelers Insurance, Their/They're/There
After all that we've done,
You still skipped out on the beat of a different drum.
Blurring the lines between failure and fortune
it's getting at Riz supporting so many people in his party, taking on their stress, organizing their extracurriculars, and literally tutoring them on subjects he doesn't know about. And they're definitely trying to keep everything under control, but sometimes it feels like when they mess up or make bad choices, it's Riz who has to take the L
5. Pitch Black, Heart Attack Man
Rock bottom smile bares its rotting teeth again
Acts like there's nothing wrong and they're still my closest friend
Romanticize the fondest memories and good times
And hope that I forget the rest
Rock bottom's grinning as it's creeping up again
Dust off the depths and make me wish that I was dead again
Hold out your hand to me
Take me to a place in hell where
Having self-esteem seems selfish and unhealthy
God the way that in Ep. 10 after Riz had that talk with his mom about everything he was just so despondent the rest of the episode about everything that was happening, and actually thinking about the toll his friendships were taking on him 💀
6. An Antidote for Strychnine, The Mountain Goats
Dig down amongst my calculations
Check my maps
Up there on the surface
Everybody's gettin' ready for the bloodbath
Stem the tide, stem the tide
They're calling down for reinforcements
Tryin' to find
An antidote for strychnine
Tryin' to find
An antidote for strychnine
This has always and forever been such a Riz song for me and I feel like it really fits the tone of Riz looking into the soil, into lucy's death, into eventually the loam farm, reluctantly telling his mom about it. The moment when he thinks that something like what happened to Yolanda could happen to his mother and he gets really serious about it. AHHHHHH Something something isolation, something something taking on dangerous tasks by yourself just to protect the ones you love
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”yay Riz is so good at Stealth and IInvestigation!”
Riz can hide like no one else. He can basically become shadow the bitch can’t get lower than a 23 if he wants to disappear, he can.
He doesn’t have to go away entirely, he can hide parts of himself away leaving the rest visible.
He hides how stressed he is. He hides his fears, his sexuality, He hides how close he is to falling apart and almost (ALMOST) no one notices.
Riz is also naturally very good at finding g things. He can find people, find out secrets, he can figure out Mysteries a millennia old. He can knows how to find what people want hidden.
Kristen’s not over Tracker, she’s not doing well, she’s worried about her god. He knows this and he’s trying to find a way to make it better, he’s running her campaign telling everyone he meets about ibis amazing friend Kristen who he knows is capable.
Fig from taking no classes to three, she’s more stressed than she’s ever been, mostly because she’s actually trying for the first time so if she fails this time it might just mean she can’t do it. He knows that, he helps her with homework and lets her come with him to hunt down clues when they both need a distraction.
Gorgug is tearing himself apart, he’s trying to be two things and the world keeps telling him he’s not good enough for either. He’s doing four years of school in one term and the administration couldn’t care less. He is realizing his parents have parts of their lives he didn’t know about, His teacher doesn’t take him seriously and He’s still listening to his Girlfriends Exgirlfrinds playlist what, 6 months after they broke up?
Riz knows this, he sees it. He helps Gorgug study, he makes sure he knows that Riz finds their friendship valuable, they have a joint birthday party, he takes his friend seriously.
Adaine is flat broke, she’s got a crappy job and an unfair schooling system. Her sister is only half taking care of herself, she can’t quite find the right answers.
Riz sees it. He will always be there to help her research, always offer a second opinion. He knows how to make money stretch, he’s lived paycheck to paycheck. He can help her all she’s gotta do is ask.
Fabian is alone. He has his doors open all the time hoping someone will walk in and stay. He’s the captain of a team, Star of the school and subject to his fathers legacy.
Riz has lived most of his life hoping to make a dad father proud, he knows the feeling. If the doors open, Riz will come, he will sit in a corner and work but he will be there. Any time Fabian feels like he may not be enough Riz is there to tell him he is the most amazing person he knows, and he means it.
Riz is watching is friends struggle, and streaching himself thin, taking on everything he can to maybe for just a second lessen their load. He can easily figure out when somethings wrong so when he does he puts his own life on the back burner. He’s mapped out every one of his friend’s academics. He’s managing a campaign, acting as a personal tutor, a member of every club in the school, a Star student and a damn good detective.
Hes burning himself alive and he’s so good at hiding, (almost) no one notices.
If he takes on too much stress, it will literally kill him.
I wonder if anyone would even know how much he was struggling.
“Oh Riz is really good at Deception and investigation, FUCK!”
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