#rip thriving in the apocalypse russian storyline you were messy and unnecessary but i loved you anyway | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

eskawrites · 4 months

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Oh I love your work!

If you’re still up for prompts, what about 17 or 24?

i'm sorry this is like weeks late anon! i could not think of something for the longest time, and then i just kept forgetting it was in my inbox. january has been a weird one, that's for sure (so weird, in fact, that i started this post in january and didn't get around to finishing it until now)

anyway.

24. "Swear it to me."

Investigating the mall had been Robin's idea.

Nancy likes to think that, if anyone else had suggested it, she would have vetoed simply because of the harrowing, far-off look that filled her eyes anytime anyone mentioned Starcourt in any context. But in all honesty, it was a good idea. Their only idea, really. So she probably would have gone with it anyway.

What she wouldn't have done is agreed to let Robin come along. But then, they don't have much choice in that, either. There wasn't much documentation left, but what was there was, of course, in Russian. And with Murray peacing out before the government could catch up to him in Hawkins, Robin was the only one left who could translate. And it was her idea. When El and Will had both voiced concerns about another gate--when their endless sweeps of Hawkins revealed nothing new--Robin had been the one to suggest checking out the tear the Russians were trying to create.

So here she is, walking down a dark metal hallway deep underground, so frighteningly silent that Nancy keeps glancing at her, afraid that something might rise up from the shadows and snatch her away without so much as a whisper.

They'd split off into pairs to cover more ground. The bunker was huge, and they needed to know nothing was waiting in the darkness for them before they risked moving toward the gate. Hopper and Joyce were the closest group, though Nancy hadn't heard their voices in a while. Jonathan and Argyle were on the other end of the facility.

Steve had sat this one out, and he'd been livid that Robin wasn't.

"Someone needs to go look," Robin had said, her voice steady only because it was so hollow. "If I can help, I want to help."

So here she is, holding out her flashlight so Nancy can keep her gun out and ready. They haven't seen anything. Haven't heard anything but their own echoing footsteps.

And yet Robin grows tenser, coils tighter and tighter, with every step they take down the sterile halls.

"You don't have to keep an eye on me," she says, yanking Nancy out of her thoughts. "I'm fine."

Nancy frowns. "I'm not allowed to be worried about you?"

"Not when we're supposed to be focusing, no."

"I can multitask."

"You are the most hyper-focused person I know when you're on a mission.

"And you're deflecting."

It's easy, now, reading Robin. She had been startled when they first met, when Robin only had to glance at her to seemingly read her mind. She gets it now. She feels attuned to Robin's every breath, these days.

Robin glares ahead. She waves the beam of the flashlight around, making sure to highlight every dark corner as often as possible.

"I wouldn't have insisted on coming along if I thought I couldn't handle it."

"I know you can handle it. I'm just saying--"

"Let's just keep going." She picks up the pace, moving forward with quick, long strides that Nancy has to struggle a bit to keep up with. Nancy scowls at her, but she keeps walking. She wonders if this is karma. If the worry and frustration clutching her chest is payback for all the times she's tried to refuse Robin's comfort.

But Robin never gives up on her, and she's a fool if she thinks Nancy won't do the same.

Before she can try again, though, Robin comes to a stop. They've reached the end of the hall, and she sweeps her light across the large room that's opened up before them. Nancy sees her grip shifting around the light as she points it toward a set of stairs leading to a windowed room.

"That's the comm center. Past that is the gate."

Nancy watches her carefully. "I though you didn't remember your way around."

"I don't, really. But we came through this room before we..." She shakes her head. "It doesn't matter. We should go right here, down that hall. We can come back when we're ready to meet up with the others."

Nancy looks around the room. It's a complete mess, empty crates and toppled furniture and broken glass everywhere. But it does seem empty. Harmless. For now, at least. So she nods and follows Robin down yet another hallway.

They take their time. Nancy's attention is torn, struggling between trying to find the right thing to say to Robin and trying to be careful enough to make them both feel safer down here. She puts herself a step ahead, peeking around corners first, taking point whenever they push open the heavy metal doors of each room they pass.

Every room looks the same, though, all concrete and chrome and cleared out supplies. Empty weapon racks. Ransacked desks.

They come across a room that reminds Nancy oddly of her dentist's office. Robin's flashlight illuminates a pair of padded stools, an overturned cart, an overhead lamp that would have illuminated the middle of the room, like the one Nancy always has to blink up into whenever she and Mike go in for their regular cleanings.

She wrinkles her nose and decides she doesn't want to know what this room was for. She turns and leaves the room again, ready to keep moving on.

Robin doesn't move with her.

Nancy looks over her shoulder. "Robin?"

No response. No movement. She just stays in the doorway, her light shining into the room. Nancy walks back over to her. Robin isn't even blinking.

She swallows. Tentatively, she reaches out and places her hand on Robin's arm.

"Robin?" she asks again, softer this time.

Robin still doesn't respond, but Nancy hears her breath quicken. She glances around the room again, wondering what she's seen, what she--

It clicks. Nancy is an idiot. She turns back to Robin.

"Robin, look at me."

She steps closer, but Robin flinches away, hard. She jerks back into the doorframe, wincing as her back collides with the hard metal corner. Nancy stops, ducking her head and trying to catch Robin's gaze.

"Easy, hey, it's okay. It's just me."

She can hear Robin's panicked breaths now. She looks back at Nancy, but her eyes are distant, unfocused, not registering her presence at all. Nancy holsters her gun and tries taking a half-step closer. Robin's gaze darts between her and the room. Her face is frighteningly pale suddenly.

"Okay, let's just--just step out of the room, okay?"

She doesn't know what to do. She doesn't even know if Robin can hear her. Her breaths keep getting shallower. She has a white-knuckled grip on the door frame behind her. All Nancy knows is that she needs to get her out of here.

"Okay. Okay. Fuck. Just--here." She closes the space between them again and takes her arm as gently as she can. She expects it when Robin tenses.

What she doesn't expect is the yell--a choked, broken cry that spills out from Robin the second Nancy touches her. She flinches back again, but with nowhere to go she only succeeds in cracks her head against the door behind her. Nancy reaches up on instinct--wanting to look, wanting to cradle her a little closer and make sure she's alright--and something in Robin snaps. She flails in Nancy's arms, struggling so wildly she hits herself against the wall as often as she actually makes contact with Nancy.

Nancy tightens her grip on her. It's the only thing she can think of, the only way to just get her out of this room and away from whatever memories have such an ironclad grip on her.

"I'm sorry," she grits out as she starts dragging Robin back out into the hall. "I'm sorry. You're okay."

She gets them into the hall and half-drags, half-carries Robin down a ways until she can no longer see into the room. Robin starts shaking against her. Her knees buckle, and Nancy barely manages to support her weight long enough to ease them both gently back down to the floor. She still doesn't let go. She just holds Robin tighter even as she stops fighting her.

"You're okay," she says again. "I'm right here. They're gone. Everything's okay."

Robin makes another awful, choked sound, but it's more of a whimper than a shout this time. Nancy takes a deep breath, hoping Robin will feel it and do the same.

"It's okay." She doesn't really know what she's saying. She only knows that, if the situation was reversed--when it has been reversed--Robin has pulled her out of her own head with an endless stream of comforting words.

So she keeps talking, keeps murmuring whatever reassurances she can think of to Robin, knowing that she doesn't sound nearly as good as Robin always does, but hoping that Robin hears her anyway.

"You're safe. They can't hurt you. They're gone. Hopper and Joyce are close by, and Jonathan and Argyle. We know what we're doing. We're not going to let you get hurt."

After a while, she feels Robin shake her head against her. Then she hears a quiet, hoarse, "Bullshit."

"Robin," Nancy breathes her name, feeling relief wash over her. She rubs her hand up and down Robin's arm and says, steadier this time, "I promise, I'm right here. I'm not going to let anything happen to you."

"You don't know--"

"We haven't found anything down here, not even any signs of the Upside Down. And the Russians abandoned this place almost a year ago. The men who hurt you aren't here."

Robin shakes her head again.

"They aren't," Nancy says firmly. "Look at me, Robin. I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true."

Robin does look at her. She lifts her head enough to meet her gaze, and her eyes are wet and scared, still, but they're more focused than they've been since they entered that room.

"Nance," she whispers.

"You're okay," Nancy says again. "We--"

"Swear it." Robin gulps. "Swear it to me."

Nancy reaches up carefully. When Robin doesn't flinch away, she cups her face, her thumb brushing through the tear tracks on her cheek.

"I swear, Robs. You're not back there. You're here with me, and I won't let them hurt you. Not now. Not ever again."

Robin sniffs, and the expression breaks in Nancy's hand. Nancy pulls her closer, letting her hide her face against her again.

"You're okay." She'll say it again and again, over and over, for as long as Robin needs her to. "We're okay. I promise."

#asks #anon #prompts #ronance #thank you anon! i got there eventually lol #one of these days i'll write out a proper robin trauma story #there's one drafted in the thriving in the apocalypse doc #but it so does not fit tonally anymore #rip thriving in the apocalypse russian storyline you were messy and unnecessary but i loved you anyway

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