Awfully loyal 

Summary:  When Chuuya had too much to drink, it’s your task as the responsible girlfriend to get his sorry ass home.  OR How you found out that Chuuya would never ever cheat on you. 

Pairing: Fem reader x BF! Chuuya Nakahara

Inspired by Sweetober prompt 27: Helping button/zip

Warnings: Cursing, overconsumption of alcohol/being drunk, Chuuya fluff, 

You knew your beloved Chuuya was a lightweight.

Three glasses of wine and he was a flirt. at five he was out like a lightbulb; his snores loud enough to wake up the entire portside district. You knew it; he knew it. You accepted it as a fact- Chuuya  denied it firmly at every corner and opportunity; Port Mafia celebration or national holiday.  

His stubbornness is what made him an outstanding Port Mafia executive, an overly attentive partner and a pain in the ass boyfriend who had somehow ended up giving your number to every bar in the city. Normally it meant you’d get top service and whatever you ordered on your nights out with friends would end up on his card. Today it meant you had to pick up his drunk-ass and get it home before he leveled the city with the ground. 

You loved the man but some days even you did not know how he hadn’t gotten himself killed or robbed yet. 

“ Honestly, if you are going to get this shit-faced drunk, can’t you at least manipulate gravity into being a little lighter?” you huffed, his arm thrown over your shoulders as you struggled to help, more like drag, him inside your apartment. You were rewarded with him throwing out his leg in your direction, a purposeful or accidental attempt to trip you. You stumbled but caught yourself last second before the two of you could kiss the floor. “ Seriously Chuuya?!” 

“ Oj we’knw-heavy” he groaned, then tried again, broke out into a fit of chuckles then took a deep breath. A second passed, his cheeks blew up with air as he tried to remain composed. Then lost to whatever joke his brain told him and started laughing. Chuuya was doubling over in the middle of your hallway seemingly for no reason at all, almost dragging you down to the floor with him. 

“Seriously?!” you groaned in an angrier tone before you finally let him drop to the floor. While Chuuya laughed, you got to work with getting off his dress shoes and hat, placing them on their place in the coat rack. Then you crouched down in front of him, and waited patiently until a flash of sobriety filled his otherwise completely out of it gaze. 

As you waited you couldn’t help but find it refreshing; to see the normally composed and serious executive lay sprawled on the floor on his back, as he laughed at nothingness. The stress lines less prominent on his face, the normally ever present scowl replaced by gasps for air in between nervous giggles. He looked younger like that; less bothered by executive responsibilities and more his actual age of 22. A young man with his whole future ahead; not a troubled murderer. 

You wished you could burn this image into your mind forever; see this carefree side of him on more occasions than the rare nights he’d drink beyond reason on an empty stomach. You reached a careful hand and brushed some of his hair out of his eyes. This earned you his full attention. His eyes glistened, his look full of affection as he tilted his face and pressed a kiss to the inside of your wrist. Then another on your palm.

Such an innocent action- yet butterflies exploded in your stomach. You licked your suddenly dry lips, while you gave him the best smile you master. It was shaky at best. “ It’s getting late right?” you breathed then helped him up to his feet when he finally nodded in agreement. The chuckles returned, but more controlled this time and he needed significantly less help from you to get to the master bedroom. There he shrugged your hands off himself as he began taking off his coat; throwing the thing on the very edge of the bed. 

Good. 

You moved over to the other side of the room, changing the casual  t-shirt and jeans for a dark blue night gown before you finally crawled into the bed. 

“ Come on Chuu, get out of the suit and get into bed already. Or you’ll be too tired to get up tomorrow” you cooed as you reached for the little bedside lamp. As soon as he’d crawl into bed with you, then you’d turn it off and cuddle to his chest. Reeking of alcohol or not, you were not about to pass up cuddles and late night kisses.

You waited and waited, yet nothing. No shuffle of bare feet, no shift of clothes or the dip of the bed as he took his spot beside you. You tilted your head to the side and looked back up at him, confusing etched into your face. “ Chuuya?” 

“ I’m sure you’re lovely,” Chuuya muttered, then hiccupped, his gaze focused on the floor in front of him. His lips set into a frown. Gears turned in his head and you wished so much you could understand what the issue was; what was going on in his mind and why he wouldn’t just come over and lay down beside you like any other day.  Silence dragged on for a few moments. Then he sighed and ran a hand through his hair “ You’re pretty and all but I have a lovely girlfriend at home”

“ Chuuya?” You questioned as you moved to sit up in bed.  

“ She’s my love and my happiness, my sweetheart,, hmm.. So.. thank you for taking care of me but I can’t- won’t sleep with you” he stated in a firm yet drunken tone, slurring some words. Yet they came out with surprising firmness, a grave seriousness you rarely heard directed towards you. While you sat stunned, Chuuya grabbed his coat from the side of the bed and made steps towards the door. He swayed, changed his mind and moved to the opposite side of the room, the spot furthest away from you. There he slid down the wall and dropped the coat over himself. Before you could even register what happened he was already fast asleep, soft snores the only sound in the otherwise silent room. 

Getting up, you came over to him and stopped a small distance away from him before you took a seat on the floor beside him. Once settled in a semi-comfortable position  you just watched him sleep the night away with the widest smile on your lips. In the morning you’d be sure to make him the best hangover breakfast and shower him in well deserved kisses, showing him just how much you appreciate him 

After all, once again, Chuuya showed you that you were the only woman on his mind and he was nothing if not loyal to you. 

Author note: When a close friend needs a Chuuya fic, who am I to deny that? So consider this a rare 2-for-1 special. Hope you enjoyed~

©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

A Hit Beyond Rock Bottom 

Summary:  You may not be able to bond with your children but you were still going to be a good mother, a wonderful mother. You would not abandon them and you’d make sure they didn’t unnecessarily suffer in this cruel cruel world. If only Dazai and Chuuya would let you. 

Pairing: Dazai x Chuuya xfem! Reader (skk x fem!reader) 

Author note: An independent part two for Happy unhappy home!Check that fic out if you’d like more angst, skkx reader new parents and see more of what happened right before this scene! 

Warning: Cursing, depression/ postpartum depression, New parents/exhausted parents =bad choices/reactions, Angst, 

Enjoy~

The water was warm. 

Yet against your freezing body it felt almost burning. Boiling. Scalded your skin on the feel- yet left the flesh normal coloured, barely tinted pink in comparison to its usual pale shade. As you stare at your hand, you understood that it couldn’t be as hot as it felt. And yet each shift- each rocking back and forth motion seemed to hurt you. The manifestation of imaginary pain. A pain you just wanted to stop as much as the responsibilities and the lonely suffocation feeling. And yet the more you thought of leaving the safety of the bathroom- of the bathtub, the more it filled you with dread. It made the tears stream harsher down your cheeks. Thankfully your crying was muffled by the sound of the running water. 

-art

You held the twins closer to your chest, cradled them. Rocked them back and forth, back and forth in the water. Here, in this tub, in this warm liquid they’d be safe and comfortable, They were protected, sheltered in their mothers embrace. Fed and clean. Not loved- not yet at least but tolerated and guarded. You were going to shelter them- from the darkness, from the yelling downstairs, from the world that only consisted of pain. You would save them from all this suffering. 

-heart

They were not loved; but at least not abandoned. They were cared for and their every need met. Even if you did not bond with them- you wouldn’t forsaken them. They were yours; your two precious ginger balls of anything-but-joy. Yours- they came out of you and you had put so much into their care and well being at expense of your own. They were the physical token- the manifestation of your deep love for your partners. More accurately- for your once partners; Dazai and Chuuya. The thought of their names broke something in you. Reminded you of your earlier argument; 

“– we think you might have postpartum depression”  

 The way they looked at you–the iciness in their eyes- as if you were a murderer. No, as if you were worse than a criminal. All because there was something so inherently wrong with you that you couldn’t love them; your twins. A sob tore through your chest, then another as the twins let out a sleepy coo’s. As if sensing your distress amidst their slumber. You brought them even closer to your chest. Then bit your lips hard- so hard you tasted blood- to hold back the wail which threatened to spill into the open. No.. Quiet. You had to be quiet. The twins were snoozing. A good mother would let them sleep. Rest peacefully. A good mother would make sure her babies were fed and happy and sleeping in her embrace the way they were supposed to. The way things were always supposed to be. Happy, cared for and safe. 

You couldn’t love them but you could be a good mother for them. You were going to do everything right for them. You would make sure they were safe and peaceful. You would make sure they did not experience the painful reality that was this world; protect them from the agony that existed all around you. The endless torture- the human existence. 

“ SWEETHEART!” 

The sound of the smashed bathroom door snapped you out of your trail of thoughts. It made you aware of water overflowing out of the bathtub and then the paddling of feet right through the mess. 

“ No, don’t take them from me. They’re mine, MINE, STOP!” you screamed as you felt hands grasp at you. You felt them grab at your arms, trying to pry them away from your twins. Two male voices hollered- the sound rang painfully in your ears. They were more desperate now, trying to take your twins out of your hold “ They’re mine! Don’t take them from me!” you screamed just as the babies were torn out of your grasp, away from your chest. 

You felt panic set in, and rushed to stand up in the tub, desperately trying to follow Chuuya out of the bathroom. You felt lightheaded, dizzy and yet forced your body out of the tub. You stumbled, your ankle bruised as your feet made painful contact with the bathroom floor. You ignored it trying to run and yet--- You were blocked by Dazai’s chest; his hands on your shoulders; they pressed down painfully onto your skin. He was holding you back from going after Chuuya, from going after the twins. 

You realized you were screaming- making inhuman wails of anguish. You were trying to escape his hold, thrashed and screamed in the inhuman fear of not seeing or hearing your babies. The terror of never seeing them again. 

“ -donna” you managed to shake one hand off your shoulder and did another desperate attempt to leave the bathroom. But Dazai held you back; he pushed you further and further away from the door and towards the bathtub. His now free hand grasped at your chin, trying to get you to look up and face him. To look at him. You thought he was saying something- could see his lips moving but all you could hear was the rushing water around you and your own desperate cry

“ THEY’RE MINE, I’m their mother, you can’t; YOU CAN’--” 

Slap

The force of the slap threw you to the ground; your knees made contact with the bathroom floor and the several inches of cold standing water there. The coldness of it sippied into your body, chilled you down to your soul. But not as much as the sudden silence in the bathroom. You didn’t realize what happened. Stumped by the fact that your normally controlled lover would dare raise his hand against you. To hurt you, to humiliate you. You. If not his lover then at the very least the mother of the twins- the children. Your children. 

You said nothing, did not even look at him as Dazai knelt down to your height a few paces away. He wasn’t touching you anymore. Did not even reach out to check on you, to comfort you. Just stared at you as if you were no different from anyone else in his life; no different from any of his so-called students. 

“ I have never had a reason to hit you. You’ve always been a smart girl- don’t give me another reason to do it, again. If you’re sick- get help.” You felt a shiver- a fear induced shudder settled in your body as Dazai stared you down. The distance between you was so painfully obvious. The clear indifference on his part hurt you more than the thumbing of your cheek and the pain in your knees. 

Why couldn’t he see that you were doing your best? That you just wanted to be a good mother, and a good partner. That you just wanted to be appreciated for everything you did. That you just wanted to be his and Chuuya’s wife. 

“ They’re fine!” Chuuya’s voice echoed from outside the bathroom. “ Heard that Mackrel?! The twins are fucking fine- thank fuck for that” 

You heard Dazai breath out a sigh- an frustrated hissing noise. His eyes searched you for a moment longer, searched your gaze. But you didn’t meet his eyes. Did not even look at him as the tears streamed down your cheeks.

In ice cold fashion Dazai stood back up. He fixed you with one final pointed look. A sharp glance filled with detest and anger. Like you were his enemy. Then he brushed past you and out towards the wailing twins and Chuuya outside. He did not care about anything else besides them. No, he left you all alone on your knees amidst the still gushing water. Left you all alone to do whatever you wanted, seemingly completely indifferent to whatever happened to you. 

More tears rushed down your cheeks, your hands balled into fists. Your cheek stung, your throat hurt. Yet not as much as the sound of your twins wailing and the words of sweetness and comfort spewing out from Dazai and Chuuya’s mouths. Words of praise and affirmation they so easily uttered towards the babies, yet not towards you. 

The kind of words that just told you, you had just lost it all.  Your family, your lovers and most probably, most frighteningly; your twins. 

Authors note:... Happy ending and resolving it all? Nope not this one either. Better luck next time?

This fic exists thanks to all the people who wished to see how this series of fics would end. Thank you so much for your continued support and motivation. I know this one does not entirely fit the style but trust me, I have a plan with it (or well more of an idea really)

Click here for: Part 1 and part 2; or Check out Raven's masterlist.

©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

How do you want it

Summary: Dazai has gotten you many presents, and has been generous enough to let you pick which one you wanted to try first. But it was best your hurried, or else he’d pick one for you. 

Pairing: Fem! reader x Dazai Osamu  

Warnings: Mature content minors DNI!

This fic/drabble contains: 

Use of sexual toys, mention of oral (female receiving), use of cuffs, inexperienced nervous reader with very experienced Dazai. 

“Come now belladonna, if you keep me waiting I’ll just have to decide for you” 

His singsong voice sent shivers  up and down your spine. Butterflies- no anxious and excited snakes played ping pong in your stomach. You bit your lip, holding back a gasp as you felt him draw nearer. Hot breath hit the base of your neck, arms on either side of you, ever so often he brushed them up against yours. Hairs raised on your arms with each touch; goosebumps on your skin gave your arousal away. 

Traitorous body. 

You could practically hear the smirk in his voice as he hummed closer; as he caged you in between his chest and the array of ‘gifts’ he had so thoughtfully laid out on the table. “ Well my belle?” Dazai trailed the shell of your ear with his lips, then nipped ever so slightly on your earlobe. You gasped- your perfect mask of disinterested control, not so perfect anymore. Another nip, then smirking lips landed on your cheek. 

A mocking sweet touch- a taunting kiss.

“ Now that we’ve established you’re interested in my Valentine night suggestions, why not pick the ones you fancy” Dazai chuckled and made an exaggerated motion towards the table once more. All covered in pink and red and white erotic simulators and their likes. Few reasonable- many far beyond what you had seen, let alone tested. 

“ We did not establish anything, I am not–” Dazai grasped your hand in his and trailed it over the phallic appendages, purposefully wrapping your hand around the largest- monstrous sized dildo. The thing you couldn’t even grasp with one hand- let alone push inside you. “ -Maybe this one bella?”

 Before you could reply he moved your hand towards the rabbit vibrator still inside its newly purchased special edition box.

 “ Or this inside you, taking you to highs of pleasure while wearing these-” Dazai purred as his hand left yours and grasped the skimpy underwear made of actual candy. The devil's grin was back- you caught a glimpse of it as Dazai leaned back to your ear, as if sharing a secret he didn’t want anyone to hear. And yet his voice was loud- so loud anyone passing by his office would be able to hear him; “ Imagine donna; the rabbit inside you while I eat these off your gushing pussy, one candy at a time. With you being the ultimate desert” 

 His body pushed up against you, hard cock against the cushion of your ass. The clothes doing little to hide his desperate need; the carnal desire that could barely wait until the work days end. Dazai pushed himself firmer against you, almost rutting the soft flesh. Scratch waiting until tonight- you’d be surprised if he could hold himself through his next meeting without either skipping it or doing something indecent under the table. 

“ Maybe we should check that they fit you, sweetheart?” Dazai’s lips were on your neck, his teeth assaulting the delicate skin. Not giving you time to think, to pick, to consider- just time to feel. 

“ The c-cuffs” you gasped out in between moans, finally picking your gift. The words made Dazai freeze- pause as if he did not expect that answer. Then he raised his head, the look in his eyes sadistically lust filled. 

“ I agree belladonna,let's add the cuffs to this delicious mix!” 

Author note: Happy naughty Valentines day! I hope this fic fills your mind with all sorts of ideas! Stay tuned for another fic update in four hours.

Hope you enjoyed ❤️

Like this work and want more? Check out Raven's Masterlist

©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

List of Chores  

Summary:  You wanted to say no. You wanted so badly to say ‘not tonight’ but as you looked at Chuuya’s bright hopeful eyes, looked at the wine that was not yours, the dress that was not yours or the house that was not yours, you had no choice but to say ‘yes’. 

Pairing: Couple! Fem reader x Chuuya 

Raven’s Special prompt: “Can I ask for Raven's special, a NSFW fic with Chuuya?  Reader wants to stop the sex because it doesn't feel pleasurable anymore, but doesn't know how to voice it? And maybe it gets Chuuya confused about how she's acting? Feel free to twist this however you feel like it.” 

Warnings: Mature, triggering content; minors DNI!

This fic contains: Pressure sex/dubious consent, Cursing, dirty talk, rough sex and insults towards reader, some hand stuff, penetrative sex, hint at unsafe sex, and probably something else I missed. It's dark and icky.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

“ You’re so beautiful tonight, sweetheart” Chuuya breathed a tipsy purr as he pulled you into his lap, one arm snaked around your waist while the second took his refilled glass out of your grasp and set it on the couch side table. 

“ Are you saying I’m not beautiful usually?” you teased lightly, hopeful that he’d entertain your joke instead of turning this pleasant homey night into something sexual. Your hopes shattered the second he pressed his lips to the base of your neck. 

The knot of anxiety formed in your stomach as he hummed against your skin in thought. It wound tighter as Chuuya trailed opened mouth kisses all the way up to the shell of your ear. Hot tongue teased your earlobe followed by sensual nips of sharp teeth; “ You know what I mean dollface” the arm around your waist tightened ever so slightly before it relaxed and shifted back. Fingertips played from the edge of your ribcage then up, trailing the outline of your bra. 

“ C-Chuuya..” you started, shuddering as he dipped his hand inside the v-line of your dress, cool leather ghosted over your nipples. 

“ Mmm? tell me if you want to stop, baby” Chuuya pulled back and grasped your chin in between his thumb and forefinger, then turned your face to face him. His eyes a dark lust filled blue, cheeks tinted a rosy red although you were unsure whether it was from desire or wine. A flirty smirk adored his face; he knew you could feel his half-hard bulge press up against the curve of your ass, completely feelable through the thin material of your dress. “ Tell me now sweets.” he breathed then licked his lips as his eyes landed on the wine glass tightly grasped between your fingertips. 

You gave him an apologetic smile, parted your lips to utter the reply that felt the most right to you. You wanted to say no. You wanted so badly to say ‘not tonight’. Yet as your eyes landed on Chuuya’s bright hopeful ones you felt your resolve weaken, a splash of guilt grasped at your heart. You licked your lips and tried to speak again; yet all you could do was watch as Chuuya  ignored your smile- misread it. His expression filled with desire and approval.

Lust only for you. 

The nauseating guilt grew deeper as you noticed his eyes flicked downwards to the wine again before he reached for it, took a sip. then passed the glass right back.

Right. A subconscious reminder. 

Yes, the wine that was not yours. The dress that was not yours. Even the house you lived in was not yours. You weren’t on the lease, weren’t even a tenant. Yes, most of the commodities you enjoyed were his. So, if he wanted to he could strip you bare and throw you out that instant. And you’d be entirely helpless. 

You didn’t think he would; but you feared. And in all that, you had no choice but to say ‘yes’. 

“ Oh I’ll make you feel so good, doll” His lips were on yours, tongue lapped at your lipstick before pushing past. The taste of cigarettes and wine filled your senses. You focused away from it and on his hands which momentarily left your body, only long enough to take the glass from your grasp and set it on the couch side table.

Please drop it and we can call it a night

His hands found yours and guided them to the belt of his pants. A silent demand to unbuckle it. You forced your mind to focus, ignored his lips which left yours. Instead they nipped on your neck. Chuuya focused on the spots that drew reactions from you; soft gasps or groans of pleasure. 

Please don’t, no further

His dick sprung to life, hard and ready. Leaking hot pre-cum. Almost too quickly you gripped his lengths in your hands, giving it a few pumps. Chuuya moaned, a breathy sound. “ Mmmm just like that, sweets, keep doing that” 

You trailed your thumb from the tip of his lengths, down his shaft then back up again. If you played your cards right then maybe– 

“Spread your legs for me doll, that’s it, what a good toy you are” Chuuya moaned, his fingers dipping past your panties. The leather circled your hole, before several digits pushed in. His thumb on your clit, rubbing it to the rhythm of his thrusts. 

Is there enough food left for breakfast tomorrow? 

“ God you’re doing so well, you’re my little whore aren’t you?” Chuuya cursed again, buckled his dick in your grasp. More pre-cum spilled on you; on your hand and some onto the bunch up dress still on you. He was so close, you could feel it. Moments before- he pulled your hand off him and shifted you closer, spreading your legs even wider. 

You bit your lips as he pushed in.  

The eggs have probably expired, best to get new ones in the morning.  

“ ahh my slutty doll you feel so fucking good, you wanted this yeah? My precious slut” the hand that groped your ass gave the soft flesh a sudden slap. You yelped then groaned as his fingers found your clit again. His voice an upscene purr in your ear as he thrusted harder into your hole.

Your teeth tore at your lips as tears gathered in the corners of your eyes. Each thrust filled you with pleasure, each touch drew moans past your lips, yet each word past his lips filled you with guilt and shame. Your mind was not with you, not present in the moment. Instead you silently recited the never-ending list of chores you had to tend to. 

But at least you could cross off sex for a day or two… 

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The word that made the difference 

Summary:  You knew you had to get professional help even if you did not want to, Dazai’s words and actions made it absolutely clear to you he wouldn’t tolerate anything else, and Chuuya seemed to silently agree with him. Still the answer you got was not for the question you asked; but that one word was enough to make you reevaluate everything. 

Pairing: Dazai x Chuuya xfem! Reader (skk x fem!reader) 

Author note: An independent continuation of Desperate times series, and next part of  Happy unhappy home! Check that series out if you’d like more angst, skkx reader, new parents, all that and see more of what happened right before this scene! 

Warning: Cursing, depression/postpartum depression, New parents/exhausted parents =bad choices/reactions, Angst,  

Enjoy~

Pregnant

The word felt unfamiliar- surreal- like a misdiagnosis wrapped in excuses, wrapped in women’s issues and wrapped in reasons to get you out of the office. Yet it was as if that singular word explained everything you had experienced lately and nothing at all. Maybe it explained the hopelessness, the darkness, the unbearably tense existence that has become your home; but it could not explain the way you felt about the twins. The inability to connect with them. Or the inability to feel any warmths from Dazai and Chuuya. Perhaps, at this point, you were so ruined and wrong that you could not connect with anyone. Not the twins, not Dazai and not Chuuya. 

We think you have postpartum depression

A part of you wanted to stand up, run out of the medical office and into the waiting room right outside where the four of them were waiting. To rub it into the two mafioso's faces that they were wrong. Ha the geniuses were not genius enough to sidestep medical school, and it wasn’t as easy as to use some template they took from god-knows-where and assed you by it instead of talking with you, asking you, helping you. They were wrong- you were right. You won. 

But what was your prize? 

“ I have never had a reason to hit you. You’ve always been a smart girl- don’t give me another reason to do it. Again. If you’re sick- get help.” 

Dazai’s words from a day ago rang in your ears. His tone, the iciness in his gaze as he brought you down to the knees in cold standing water with a single slap repeated itself in your mind. Like a never-ending loop it played before your eyes. Your mind, the twisted bastard, hadn't left the image unchanged, but rather conjured up the way it must have looked from all angles; from the side, from above and even from below. Driving in the humiliation further. Like some dramatic exaggerated scene out of a soap opera, a middle aged housewives tv-series, and the act was meant to be a huge burden for the main stars in season one but then it gets solved three episodes later. 

Forgiven and forgotten.

But this wasn’t a soap opera, this wasn’t some lame drama created to satisfy lonely women as they waited for their loving husbands to come home from golf. This was reality. Your reality- your life. And soon, not only your own. That one realization grounded; it was enough to escape the clutches of shock and confusion and placed you back inside the small, simple medical office and the woman opposite you.  

“ Well yeah, it’s no wonder you’ve been feeling like shit the last few weeks. I’d say congratulations but really— “ 

Yosano’s voice faded into the background again; your mind tiffany twisted, drowned out her words as more flashbacks pulled you under the surface of reality. Simple things, comparisons like the joy last pregnancy brought and the dread this one carried. How caring, sweet and gentle it started but how difficult the previous one ended; and how difficult this one started while the thought of it getting worse filled you with dread. 

Blood rushed to your ears; your pounding heart overshadowed all sounds, dulled the quiet medical office into an obnoxiously loud space. Your vision blurred, tunneled and span. Inadvertently you pressed the fingers of your shaking hand to your eyes and rubbed them, then shook your head to try and clear the dark dots which played in your sight. 

You wondered how and why it happened. You couldn’t fathom the idea that you were, yet again, carrying a life inside you. No, it was absurd. Surely Yosano was mistaken, it hadn’t even gone that long since the twins were born and– 

All at once the reality came crashing back down again. You were back on the hard chair, back opposite Yosano and suddenly very aware of every inch of the office. And the continuation of her displeased rant; the way her tone grew louder, annoyance sipped into every syllable. The barely held back curses which evidently played on the tip of her tongue. Yet she tried to look casual, head rested in the palm of her hand, body language open and turned towards you. But the anger was undeniable in the way her second hand gripped the pen, almost snapped it in half and poured the goey black onto a pile of papers- the results that signaled your doom. “ I told the damned bastards to–” 

“ – But I thought you couldn’t get pregnant at least until 18 months have passed after birth” you interrupted her, your voice a fraction away from hysterical. You looked at Yosano expectedly, begging her for the confirmation that this was some weird biological fluke. A mistake that no one of you could have predicted.

You jumped as she slammed her fist against the wooden desk. 

“ Where the hell did you hear that bullshit from?” Yosano took a deep breath, slipped back into her composed doctor mask and did you the courtesy to reply to your questions calmly and professionally “It’s not recommended to get pregnant earlier than 18 months after delivery, to give the body time to heal. However, biologically speaking, there’s nothing preventing you from it once you’ve gotten your period. Some can get pregnant as early as four weeks after.” 

You bit your lips to hold back a curse, and hung your head at your own stupidity. “ But one time..” you mumbled absentmindedly as memories of an unromantic quickie on the same night the pair returned home from their months long mission ran through your mind. A disappointing act that drove a rift in your relationship. That became a silent fight you never openly addressed; just picked up your things and moved into the shoe-sized spare bedroom. Something which neither part of double black seemed to mind. 

If anything you swore your absence in the bedroom brought them relief. 

To your surprise, Yosano rested a comforting hand on your shoulder. “ Sometimes one time is plenty. Now then to break the news-” She moved away from you and began stomping towards the door which separated her office from the rest of the medical bay. And ultimately, the space where your so-called lovers waited with the twins. 

“ No wait!” you cried. In an instant up on your feet, both hands wrapped around Yosano’s arm. Although she was undoubtedly stronger, the action was shocking enough to halt her movements. She turned to face you, surprise edged into her features. But you couldn’t meet her eyes. No, you did not want her to see that the seemingly perfect relationship had been reduced to shambles. A broken thing which had become filled with responsibilities and fear. The thought made your cheeks redden in shame; never ever in your life would you have thought you’d be fearful of your lover's reaction to seemingly joyful news. And even more shamefully, feel the need to make excuses for it in public. 

“ Tell me honestly Y/N” Yosano’s voice was low, the accusation unmistakable. 

“ It’s Dazai’s” You answered in a heartbeat, met her gaze full on with the most earnestness you had ever displayed in your life. “ Undoubtedly his.” 

You dropped your hand from her arm and brought it back to your side, wrapped it protectively around your stomach. You forced your lips up into a smile, hoped it looked innocent yet nervous. Then mellowed out the look in your eyes to the point the blush looked more shy than guilty. “ W-well, you know, Dazai’s been wanting a child of his own since the twins and I.. just want to break the news to him in a special way.” The lie rolled smoothly off your tongue and Yosano seemed to buy it. 

She laughed at you, teased you for the still corny behavior while lightly reminded you this wasn’t your first kid as she sat back down and began going over essential medical information with you. Information you took in with a smile, nodded in appropriate places without really listening. But who could have blamed you? 

Your mind was for once on your side as it formed second by second a feasible plan for you. Not easy, but manageable. Drunk on thought that you, YOU, the innocent little weak dove had gotten away with such a blatant lie gave you the courage you needed to indulge in those thoughts. The thoughts you hadn’t even dared to think of before. Now they felt so close and so real. 

Although, admittedly, the lie you uttered wasn’t a complete lie. Indeed, you intended to make sure he would find out this news in the most unforgettable way possible. 

You just never said the surprise was going to be good… 

Author note: The first part of this chapter is dedicated to each and every person who thought A Hit Beyond Rock Bottom was not heavy /angsty enough and Dazai’s actions weren’t too bad.

The second part is for us who can see that the reader is strong and it's time to see that strengths manifest itself into something useful. Well hope you enjoyed this and until next time~

Click here for: Part 1 , part 2 and part 3 or Check out Raven's masterlist.

©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

This was supposed to be a good day

Summary:  You haven't seen Chuuya in almost a decade. The humiliation of his break up with you still burned fresh, still hateful. No you never wanted to see his stuck up “I am better than everyone” attitude ever again. Unfortunately for you fate had other plans. And this time it was unlikely that he would leave you alone, even with your threats. 

Pairing: Fem!reader x (ex) Chuuya Nakahara

Inspired by Not today fic by @chuuyaswifeandhoe. So all cred for this thing goes to her. Please check her amazing works out if you're into really painful angst!

Warnings: Cursing, angst, parents

“ Get back here you little rascals!” 

Children's laughter filled the empty playground as you chased the twins around the slide. Past the climbing net, and all the back to the steps which lead up into the wooden playpen. You were just shy of catching your daughter, your fingers brushed against her ginger ponytail. A little more and– she ducked inside the round playtube with a giggle- just out of your gasp. You could hear her small hands slam against it as she shuffled through to the other side and out of your reach. Before you could follow after; you gasped, stopped and spun around as yet another snowball hit your back. 

You scanned the play area until you caught sight of a head of messy ginger locks belonging to your son. Your little boy full of mischief who was in the process of throwing yet another snowball at you. 

“ Hey don’t even think about it Daiki-” your playful voice was cut off as the snowball made contact with the front of your jacket. You narrowed your eyes at him, watched the way he froze mid motion with a slightly guilty look on his face. Then as you took a step in his direction, the boy audibly yelped before he started running. 

You were not going to let him escape you.

You ducked, narrowly avoided hitting your head on the monkey bars and ran just a little bit faster. “ Gotcha!” you laughed as you circled your arms around the little boy. You lifted him up and spun him once, twice your joint laughter filled the silence until you heard your daughter’s cute yell; “ Me next, mama, me next!” as she ran straight into you with full force. 

If she was older and heavier she might have successfully tackled you to the ground. But being the tender age of seven she was barely strong enough to make you shift weight. Still you acted along and pretended to be brought down to one knee, still holding her twin to your chest. “ Ahh Fumiko you got me” you groaned out as your daughter jumped up and down in glee. Then the two ganged up on you; with giggles small hands tried to drag you down further into the snow while the same small hands tried to tickle you through the thick coat. Your joint laughter filled the empty playground in the otherwise calm park. 

The day was beautiful; chilly but perfect in the sense that you had the entire play area to yourself. Just you and your two precious twins with whom you made heartwarming memories together. Another perfect day, another perfectly sweet–

“ Y/N?” That voice sent shivers up and down your spine. The pleasant shivers of longing which made your heart shred itself in your chest mixed together with painful memories of humiliation. The condescending degrading way he had tossed you aside. The icy blue of his eyes- the twisted smirk- imagines that you had desperately hid in the very back of your mind behind lock and key were slowly coming back. Flashed one by one right before your eyes. 

His words from years ago and the way you cried and begged for him, the way he brought you to your knees and then kept tearing you to shreds. 

Completely humiliated. 

That humiliation was twisted and turned into a tight knit ball of anger in the pit of your stomach. Filled your lungs with air; a suffocating rage. At that moment you did not know what you were going to do if you turned around and actually saw Chuuya. Were you going to yell? Hit him? Demand an explanation for his cruelty? Rub in his face that he had lost years with his children and that this one chance encounter would be the only time he would ever get to be in their presence?

“ Mama are we done playing already?” you were brought out of your trail of thoughts by Fumiko. Her expression was sad; huge blue eyes stared into yours not understanding what happened but being old enough to realize it was not something good. Daiki clung to you tightly, clearly afraid. The anger inside you subsided enough that you could plaster a pleasant albeit forced smile onto your lips. “ Yes but if we go now you can play some video games when we get home.” before the words could leave your lips, the twins were out of your embrace and running throughout the playground to collect their things. 

Their childish innocence warmed your heart. 

The smile on your lips faded the second you saw a gloved hand stretch towards you out of the corner of your eyes, a silent offer to help you off the ground. You ignored it, used your anger as sufficient fuel to stand up in one swift motion. You shook off the snow before you turned to face Chuuya, arms crossed over your chest. 

He looked more stunning than when you last saw him. More of a man; sophisticated suit, a brand new coat and his usual hat now adored with additional accessories. He wore cologne; a musky scent which just barely hid the smell of cigarettes off of him. “ Oj Doll,Why the fuck did you not fuckin’ let m’know?” his tone was accusing, hurt and angry. His blue eyes bore holes into you so clearly demanding an explanation. 

You gave him none. You did not have to; you did not need to. A part of you wanted to deny that the twins were his- but you bit your tongue to prevent that. You knew that even a blind bastard would see the similarities. Still you relished in the idea that this hurt him. You hoped this hurt was even a fraction of the hurt he caused you. 

“ It’s none of your business” you stated icily, out of the corner of your eyes you kept track of Fumiko and Daiki; made sure none of his goons for hire would even attempt to approach the two. 

“ None of my– the fuck?! You sold the goddamn fuckin apartment, kept this from me and just–” 

“-the apartment and all its content which you left to me for wasting my time, effort and looks on you” you cut him off, old hurt surfaced like a steel knife. But no, as much as you wanted to yell and accuse him, to tell him exactly what you thought of him you decided against it. You were not going to stoop down to his level. You were better than that- better than him. And especially not in front of your twins who waited nervously for you at the edge of the playground “ We’re done here.” 

“ Oj Y/N don’t you even–”

Chuuya reached out for you and you sidestepped his touch. His action made you lose a sliver of your self control in the process;“ Touch me and I will call the police; it won’t lead to anything but we both know the mafia doesn’t want to flash in front of the government.” your voice was icy as you watched him drop his hand back to his side. 

His face took on a surprised expression, clearly not expecting the threat. 

You took this moment to continue “ I have never been happier than in these seven years without you. Seeing you today just ruined my day and time with my babies. We don’t need or want you, so make yourself scarce.” You fixed him with a pointed look and made sure he understood each syllable that left your lips. Then you turned on your heel and left the playground. You held your head high, proudly, as you left the playground with your twins safely in your arms. 

You meant every word you uttered to him, every syllable past your lips. You hated him, detested him for everything he had done to you. And yet why did your heart ache so pitifully?  

Author note: This fic was written today and thus hasn't had a lot of editing. Once again it's all thanks to @chuuyaswifeandhoe. Think of it as an early next-week update ;)

All fics are unique works by ©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

Men like flowers too 

Summary: When you get him flowers for valentines day, his reaction is far from what you expected OR sometimes taking a risk pays off. 

Pairing: fem! reader x Chuuya 

Requested by: @chuuyaswifeandhoe Thank you so much for your request, it was most certainly one of the more challenging ones for me. Still I hope this is at least a fraction of what you imagined 🩷

Warnings: cursing, reckless driving, very very light hint at possible sexual content

You did not know whether this was a good idea or if it would somehow make the already disappointing Valentine's turn a bitter-sour awkward experience as you missed the mark entirely. Twisted precious Japanese traditions into something western-influenced- but not really. All the while making a hot mess of yourself in the process.

But you were about to find out. 

Without a second thought, you opened the passenger side of the bright red sports car and you flopped down into the leather seats quickly and in-elegantly. You made sure you were inside the vehicle and ready to go before your beloved valentine had a chance to finish his textmessage. The second a low tsk’ made it past his lips followed with a half-hearted curse as his thumb brushed over the turn-off button of the small device, you made your move.

“ Here you go” Your voice was a sing-song purr as you stretched more like dump in his lap a box of especially imported wine infused chocolates and the exceptionally large and ridiculous bouquet of red and orange flowers tied together with a matching obnoxious ribbon that ended in a rosette. You tried to sound casual- like this was the most natural thing in the world for you to do as you reached towards the seatbelt. 

Still you watched Chuuya’s reaction closely.

First, the way his eyes widened, a mildly surprised expression clouded the otherwise focused and slightly work-annoyed look. Then his lips set into a straight line: a thin, displeased thing. As if you had just critiqued him to his face about something Chuuya had done but had not had the chance to show it off to you.Yet. 

An unjustified disappointment.  

“ Did you buy these for yourself, Sweetheart?” Before you could answer he leaned towards the passenger side, the flowers you got almost squashed between you two. His fingers grasped your chin and forced you to look him straight in the eyes. No escape from those piercing orbs. 

“ Y/N what did we say? You never buy flowers for yourself, Baby-girl. Especially not on fucking Valentines of all days- that is my job” he kept his voice low and leveled, yet the red of his eyes gave you an indication of how annoyed he was. No how angry he got at the mere thought that you consider him so incompetent so as to not get you flowers on the one day a year dedicated to love in western traditions.

Japanese traditions could go screw themselves. He was not about to do nothing for you while you showered him in chocolates of all shapes, makes, qualities and sizes. 

“ They’re for you, silly” you replied with a small nervous smile tugged on the corners of your lips. However your nervous smile was quickly replaced with an amused one as you watched his eyes widen, returning back to stunning blue as he shifted them away from you and down towards the flowers between you. They widened as they landed on the petals, getting bent in between your bodies. Quickly he moved back and placed the flowers down onto his lap while he cleared his throat in silent apology. His mind obviously searched for something to say that was not the typical flat ‘thank you’ yet it came up empty. Much to his own frustration and your satisfaction. And the pink tint on his cheeks served as the cherry on top. 

This reaction was not one you would forget anytime soon. 

“ Uh-huh thanks– ahh what the heck” Chuuya started the car without warning before he pulled out of the mall parking lot, his speed double the legal limit. You rushed to get your seatbelt on in the meantime. 

The second you turned your eyes back to the road you realized something. 

“ C-chuu this isn’t the way to the Head Quarters” you gasped as he pulled out into the highway. Had your orders changed while you were collecting his gift? No, they hadn’t, you realized in horror as his lips pulled up into a smirk, while one of his hands let go of the steering wheel and dropped into your lap, giving your thigh a loving squeeze. It was a hint as to what was to come once he finally got you home. Before you could reason with him, said hand started moving upwards,drawing a startled “ Chuuya!” from your lips.

Author note: Happy Valentines day! I hope this request fullfilled your expectations. I'm aware this is not as smooth as my usual ones but I still hope it drew a smile from your lips!

This was the last SFW fic for today. The remaining three will fall within the NSFW category. So for some of you, Raven's special is coming to an end with this fic. I hope you have enjoyed and thank you all who have participated and send requests 🩷

Like this work and want more? Check out Raven's Masterlist

©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

Precious flowers get picked first

Summary: Being in charge was not an easy feat for Chuuya  especially when his subordinates reached a new level of failure. A mission a glorified monkey would be able to accomplish. Yet here they were, humiliated in front of the entire Yokohama by a little brat. Still if you kept up with that attitude then Chuuya would just have to make the move himself. Before anyone else managed to pluck his flower from him. 

Pairing: Ability user fem!reader x Boss Chuuya!

Inspired request from anon: “Placed in a universe where Chuuya is the port mafia's boss and the reader is someone who made a mistake and caught the eye of the port mafia. Maybe they got involved with some mess and ended up being a port mafia's target?” 

Warnings: Cursing, blood, an intrigued, possessive and annoyed Chuuya

Enjoy~

“ So let me get this straight” the executives words were spoken slowly, condescendingly, as if addressed to a child or a barely competent idiot who sputtered pure gibberish “- you butchered the fuckin’ mission; got your asses kicked, pick pocketed and left naked at the bank of Yokohama river to waddle all the way to the base by a fucking brat?!” 

Chuuya’s piercing eyes studied the dozen men in his office. He ran his gaze over each and every one of them; their blank faces, fear filled eyes and a slight shift in their body language that loudly screamed ‘failure’. The disheveled appearance of the more experienced members and the fish-out-of-water expressions from the new recruits only added to the awkward atmosphere. They all looked like they would have preferred anything- even death- to the predicament of delivering such a humiliating report, in person, to their boss. To stare Chuuya in the face and admit that they not only failed in their assignment but did so in the most shameful fashion- a disgrace so spectacular that death was the least of their worries. In fact they all looked like they would have preferred the encounter with the grim reaper instead of this. 

For a second, Chuuya shared that sentiment. Frustrated sigh escaped his lips; a gloved hand reached up and pressed against the bridge of his nose between his eyes in a futile attempt to combat the oncoming headache at the realization that he had yet another mess to clean up. Why bother with subordinates if they were this fucking incompetent? Why be a boss if he spent more time in the field than ever before? 

Fucking morons. 

Chuuya’s free hand rested on his desk, a nervous finger tapped away against the mahogany wood right beside his top hat, a freshly poured and forgotten glass of wine and an unlit cigarette propped up against the ashtray. A ritual to mourn the lost. The initial plan was the lost comrades- now he had the mafia’s tarnished reputation to lament for. An incident that would make Port Mafia the laughing stock of the entire district; an invitation for other organizations to challenge them. To challenge the current world order, the long since established status-quo. 

“..A girl” 

Chuuya’s eyes instantly shifted to the youngest recruit who’s pitiful voice echoed around the office. The man ducked his head; finding the carpet-clad floor uncharacteristically interesting as he repeated himself an octave louder “ It was a girl” 

“ So you had the fucking time to check the brat out instead of roundin’ her up?”

Several men flickered their gazes between each other; the closest to a lewd grin they’d dare express in front of their boss. It was as if they took Chuuya’s question as an invitation to share their observation- perhaps if they appealed to the man rather than the boss then their punishment would decrease from certain murder to manageable- albeit torturous existence.  

“ Well she was really pretty, like a serene pretty and her voice was-—” Chuuya’s fist made contact with the table; the crack of protest from the splintered wood- like the fracture of bones- silenced the office. The red power surrounded him like an ominous warning; it dared the next person to open their fucking mouth, and  become very acquainted with gravity.  

“ A little girl beat a dozen mafia and you’re fucking raving about her appearance? Get out of my sight before you regret it” Chuuya’s voice was a dangerous hiss that came out in between deep breaths. When none of the men moved he launched an ashtrash at their heads; the heavy glass hitting the youngest subordinates in the forehead. It split the skull in half, spilled its dark red insides all over the boy's face and Chuuya’s office. Not sufficiently to kill but damned near close. 

The final warning. 

A warning no one questioned as the men shuffled out of the office; some of them lingered just long enough to gasp out an apology and a ‘thank you’ for his mercy. A sharp look made them rush out and shut the door firmly behind themselves. It left Chuuya in dead silence for once during this entire damned day. Surely no one would be stupid enough to disturb him more on this godforsaken night. 

Chuuya took several calm breaths. Regained his composure, calmed the spiraled bloodlust into a manageable humm in the back of his skull. Then he stood up from his desk and made sure to take the glass of wine with him. He took a sip of it, the sweetness of it shifted the murderous bloodlust into a different emotion-  a different type of lust. For a moment Chuuya lingered by his desk, torn between going back to the icy luxurious apartment in the city or to remain in the stuffy spare room of his office. He glanced at the paperwork; eyes lingered on the late evening newspapers that depicted his underlings humiliation. 

Then he groaned audibly. 

He would need to gather his executives first thing tomorrow. Silence the publicist- deal with anyone who dared question Port Mafia's authority. Sign new deals; shut Dazai the fuck up before the damage could spread to irreversible proportions. 

With quick steps Chuuya headed towards the door in the corner of his office partially hidden by a dark curtain. Past it was a simple room with a bed, a dresser and another door which led towards the bathroom with a shower. He walked past those and towards the tiny glass table with a lamp in the corner by the only window.  He flickered it on. The lamp flared and lit up, the strong rays chased back the darkness of the room. In doing so, it illuminated a handful of pictures on the wall. 

Your pictures.

 The ones stolen from city archives- copied from security cameras. Most were fuzzy with the exception of the largest one in the middle which he had stolen- purchased- from your old family photographer. A picture unfitting the family album- or engagement-proposal photo. It was most certainly Chuuya favorite. This was the one where you showed your true character. Large curious eyes half lidded in boredom behind long lashes, lips pulled up into a displeased frown and arms stubbornly crossed over your chest. A huge red flower in your hair, just barely held in place with hair pins. 

“ You’re losing your touch, flower” Chuuya murmured as he stared at your picture. “Such a mistake to be seen; so careless. Tsk tsk tsk” 

A twirl of his wine, its sweet aroma filled Chuuya’s senses. He took a sip of it- salvaged it in the moments it took to walk up to your picture. A gloved finger trailed out your features; from your hair, to the outline of your face, over your neck then up to the frown on your lips. He ran his thumb over them, as if to brush out the sullen look. His own lips itched up into a humorless smile.  

“ hmm  m’precious, keep showing off, keep being a such stubborn naughty girl and I might just need to fetch you myself” Chuuya’s grip tightened over the photograph, scrunched it in between his fingertips as his expression twisted into something obsessively morbid. Indeed you, alive and in front of him, would be magnificently better than a mere photograph. A precious little flower who would not escape his grasp; a pretty flower he would not let others-  let any other man-  touch ever again.

After all, Chuuya was the boss of the strongest underground organization, the leader of Port Mafia. And what kind of boss would he be if he let someone else pick his precious flower first? 

Author Note: Finally this fic is out! It took me longer than I wanted it to and I hope this piece fulfilled the anon's request (if you're still around of course! So so sorry it took me so long!).

And for the rest of my gorgeous reader I hoped it peeked your interest enough that you'd wanna read a (possible) part two ;)

Liked this fic and want more? check out Raven's masterlist!

©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

Disobedient soulmate 

Summary:  Why comply with executives' demands if you were anyway going to die anyway At least you were not going to go down easy and quiet like all those other scared rabbits. No, you were not going to make this easy on him, especially if Chuuya was your soulmate.

Pairing: Fem reader x Chuuya Nakahara 

Part 2 of: Not My Soulmate: This is a continuation of ‘Not My Soulmate’ au. You can read this as a standalone as well, I think? 

Warnings: Cursing, abduction, humour,  Anyways hope you get as much a laugh from this as I did!   ~ Enjoy

Your mama always told you two rules; one, if you like a man then never hit him where the sun doesn’t shine. And two, if you do hit a man in the forbidden place then never ever stick around long enough for him to recover.  You had just broken both rules. “ Put me down” You screamed as loudly as you could- your only real power against stuffing, suffocating red that turned your body heavy and imobile on the executives shoulder. Indeed no matter how much you tried to move it, to trash and kick the ginger, you were no better than a sack of potatoes.

Although that did not make you powerless; after all you could still be an annoyance. A loud obnoxious annoyance right in his ear. If you were lucky, then it would be sufficient to make the ginger reconsider his very real actions of abducting you, “ I said put me the fuck down you- you–you under developed carrot!” “ Oj is that the best fuckin insult you got, girl? You curse like a toddler” Chuuya’s voice dripped in sarcasm seemingly unbothered by your insulting screeches. You didn’t need to look at his face to know he had rolled his eyes at you. You heard him take a deep drag of the cigarette between his lips, breathe the smoke out and away from your face, before he broke the silence again “ And you hit like one too” You gaped, your mouth opened and closed like a fish. You were unsure which part was more insulting; his words, his comparison, or the cocky grin which played on the edge of his lips. The way he walked without missing a step, smoked without a bother while he carried your body draped over one of his shoulders as though you weighed nothing. What was up with that anyway? You broke out of your trail of thoughts, your expression darkened as his hand tightened on your lower back a little bit more, purposefully doing the very opposite of your demands. Jerk. “ Set me down this instant and I’ll give you a goddamned repeat of earlier. Wanna see you call me a toddler when you’re doubled over in pain you insolent little– hey!” You yelped loudly as Chuuya suddenly took a harsh right and kicked open the door to a run down- almost abandoned looking motel in the middle of the industrial district of Yokohama. Around you were industries and workshops; factors and metal smiths. Still somehow he found some form of living arrangements amidst all those almost-identical looking metal and stone constructions. 

Then with one fluid motion Chuuya tossed you onto the only piece of furniture in the forsaken, dirty place; the bed. Your body made painful contact with the worn down thing, bringing up a huge cloud of dust in the process. In an instant you sat up, completely forgetting about being able to move again and your earlier threats. “ What the hell is your issue and who the fuck do you think you are?!” “ Shut up for a second” His tone had changed completely. Like night and day, from flirty and sarcastic to this serious almost murderous thing. Chuuya’s blue orbs, which were surrounded by the menacing red were narrowed, his tone of voice dead serious as he addressed you. The way he looked at you, the way he acted, it instilled fear in you. It seemed he was done with your bullshit and in that moment you understood why he was a mafia executive. Port mafia executive no other. “ If you wanna live then pipe the fuck down, stay put and don’ open the goddamn door for anyone, hear me?” You blinked then gasped as he took a step towards you in warning. “ Did you hear me?” Chuuya repeated each word slowly, threateningly. Until all you could do was slowly nod your affirmation. “ Good. I’ll be back soon mm‘yeah” he then turned on his heel and walked backwards towards the door. He paused in the doorway, hand on the flimsy piece of half broken wood that was intended to keep you inside this tiny dusty space one would barely call ‘a motel room’. Chuuya threw another warning look over his shoulder “ Oj don even think about running away yeah- I’ll fuckin know if you try anything- and there’ll be a punishment if you do. So be a good thing and just fuckin stay ‘ere.” Then he shut the door, plunging you into unfamiliar darkness. You sat still for a moment, stared at the dust, dirt and grime that surrounded you. Felt each heavy breath, felt the age-old filth enter your body with each inhale. You imagine it settled in your lungs with a shudder. You bit your lip, desperate to take as few breaths as possible as you listened for his movements outside. At first silence, but then you heard his footsteps retreating further and further away in the same direction from which you two had come from. Almost impatiently, you waited until they were gone. Waited until you were certain he would be out of sight. In the meantime, you listened for any other sounds around you. But none seemed threatening. You heard rats scurry somewhere beneath the floorboards, swore you saw a roach scutter inches from your shoe. And just like that you were up and running out of the front door. Consequences be damned along with his threats; no you intended to outrun him. And what better way to survive than to escape from right under an executives nose. - when safe alert the authorities.

The news warning rang through your mind, guided you. It told you exactly what it was you needed to do. First, you needed to find a phone. 

Author note: Since a precious someone has gone wayyy out of their way to make this a good and special birthday for me, the least I could do was stop teasing and actually publish this little thing. Hope you enjoy it! Like this? Check out Part 1 here, or see Raven's masterlist for more stuff to read!

You have a collect call from–

Summary:  Just because you’re still single doesn't mean you were waiting for him to come crawling back to you.You were moving on at your own pace- or so you told yourself. OR the time you made Dazai sweat a little.

Pairing: Fem reader x Osamu Dazai

Inspired by sweetober prompt 28: Calling  

Warnings: Cursing, lying, a little toxic, a little manipulative. It's BSD come on.

You have a collect call from Dazai an inmate at Mersault correctional facility. If you wish to accept the charges and proceed with the call, press 1. Otherwise–You hung up before the automated voice could finish the standard message and placed the stationary phone slowly back into its place atop the heavy, dark wooden desk inside your office. Your hand lingered atop the device for a few moments- just ready to rip it up to your ear if the bastard tried to get ahold of you again with a typical, back to back, call. 

Surprisingly, none came.  

A deep sigh escaped your lips as you pulled your hand back to your body, and dropped it heavily into your lap. Then you leaned further against the fine leathery back of your office chair. A somewhat comforting motion that put some distance between you and the thing that dared disturb your peace. As if by habit your eyes shifted to the clock which ticked away time at the opposite side of the desk. Right beside a face-down picture frame. The cursed thing showed a few minutes shy of midnight. Too early to go home in a feeble attempt to get some rest before the start of another working day; too late to go to the local bar for something stronger than a cider. 

A pity. 

Then again you were going to participate in a workshop the following day, and reeking alcohol while sitting next to the highest bosses of the organization seemed like an amateur move. As much as you wanted to take a drink; sober was your only option. 

It was for the best, you persuaded yourself for the uptenth time as you rested your head on the palm of your hand. You did not want to give Dazai the satisfaction of knowing he still had such a profound effect on you. Did not want to make him believe that just hearing his pre-recorded voice was enough to unsettle you - to make you a whirlwind of complicated emotion that only the sip of booze could dull. 

He was an ex; a part of your past. An unsatisfying, unconcluded but still a part of the past. As if on cue the phone rang again. You declined it after a second.Yet  you barely managed to pull it from your ear before the next call came. You declined that one, but then the next one rang and then the next:

You have a– 

You have a collect call– 

You have a collect call from Hello Belladonna~

With each call, each automated tone or a breath of his voice you could feel your emotions growing more messy, more intertwined. Then spiraling into a ball of burning humiliated rage. How fucking hard was it for him to take a ‘no’ for an answer? Did you seriously need to spell it out for him. Another call, another purr of his smooth voice and you finally pressed 1. A low beeping echoed in the phone then a rustling sound as your call was redirected and connected to Mersault. 

“ What the fuck do you want?!” you snapped in half a yell the second you heard his intake of breath on the other side. 

“ Aww my belladonna is angry at me, what a sad situation” Dazai’s voice sounded genuinely sad; a puppy dog whine that didn’t let you get a word in. “ Each phone call is so expensive and my Donna does not even want to pick them up. Imagine the hassle of calling your house, your phone and your cell only to find out you’re still in the office. Ahh my bella you're so cruel, I try so hard and I’m greeted with such a hateful tone. Truly– “ 

“ Cut the act Dazai” you finally gathered enough frustration to not be swept up in his skillfully crafted web of lies. Still even you could tell that your tone was not as sharp as it was before- the anger a fraction of what it was from the first dial earlier that night. 

“ My my there’s no need to be rude belladonna  I was just being polite; not easy being single in your line of work” the way he addressed you now was the more familiar tone, the playful casual smile that made it all too obvious that he thought he had you where he wanted you to. That he was certain in your infatuation with him which would have kept you waiting for his return like an obedient puppy. Clearly he didn’t expect for his puppy to grow claws. 

“ What makes you think I’m single?” you raised an eyebrow, a hint of genuine surprise sipping into your tone of voice. 

Your question made Dazai laugh; “ Come now, no one would spend a night in their office if they had a lover to come home to. Stop acting coy and just come back to me.” He sounded almost bored with his statement. Like it was the most obvious thing in the world, and yet you could hear the tiniest hint of uncertainty.  Combined with the fact that he was calling you; the questions he asked and words he spoke instead of simply turning up on your doorstep told you he wasn’t as certain in his statements as he made himself out to be. Wasn’t as confident that nothing changed in his absence as tried to make out. Perhaps he was even letting you see this thing- this weakness in exchange for an honest conversation- or maybe he was too tired and desperate to hide all his sides from you in a carefully crafted mask that was Dazai. Too bad you were not in the mood for his games. 

“ Don’t bother coming to my place, Osamu. It’s not your home anymore” you answered before hanging up the phone. Then you turned it off, not giving him the satisfaction to play with you. Nor the closure- or the ability to nag and manipulate your mind from an unknown distance away. If he wanted to talk to you, to persuade or trick you, he would have to do so in person. To get his scrawny little ass out of Mersault - which you both knew he was more than capable of achieving- and then grace you with his presence. 

Now all that was left was to wait; either you had just ruined any chances of rekindling your half-a-year-on-hold relationship with Dazai, or you had just intrigued and hurt him enough to make him crave you all the more, like the forbidden fruit dangling just out of reach of his lips. 

And only time would tell which one.  

©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

Just like Dazai 

Summary:  No one liked being compared to someone else. Especially when you suspect that there was much more to your boyfriend's relationship with his ex partner than met the eye. But did it really matter? After all, you'd never be able to meet his expectations. Because you weren’t Dazai. No matter how much he compared you to him. 

Pairing: fem! Reader x Chuuya Nakahara 

Inspired by Raven’s special anon prompt: “Chuuya accidentally hurts the reader with something he said or done. And he realizes it only when he sees her hurt expression and when she runs away from the room? “ 

Warnings: Cursing, mention of alcohol consumption, hurt/ light angst. hint at SSK, 

Enjoy

“ Goddamn it, you’re just as fucking bad with your bets as Dazai” 

The smile faded off your lips and twisted down into a frown. Your laughter which rang out together with the loud music of the arcade died down in your throat. All that was left behind was the obnoxious tune of the game you two had been playing for the past hour or so. The victory dance and loud screech on your screen and the ’you lose’ on Chuuya’s with an even louder melody which seemed to mock the ginger. Without your joy and laughter you could clearly hear it now; the frustrated growls of having lost yet another round of the game he swore he would kick your ass in. The musings at the fact that he was supposed to be better than you, the bitter one-line comparisons between the way you played the game and Dazai. 

It was always Dazai. Dazai would have made a different attack in that last second, and then Chuuya would have had you where he wanted you. Dazai would have missed that last shot and then Chuuya would have been able to– 

His quiet rant left a bitter taste in your mouth. You had only ever caught sight of the ex-mafia executive once as a new recruit  but now you seemed to constantly exist in his shadow. Dazai, who was supposedly only a mission partner, was someone your boyfriend compared you to. Dazai, the bastard who was no longer in the Port Mafia. Dazai who was so much smarter- he would have goddamn planned better for the mission and then there’d be no casualties. Dazai who’s reports were always short and straight to the point when delivered to Mori, while yours were always too long. Dazai this, Dazai that! 

Dazai wasn’t there- he had left of his own volition while you stayed and served and slaved. Fought for the Mafia- fought for Chuuya. Showered him in love, affection and care. And yet still, somehow, despite not being Dazai you lived in his shadows. 

 Whatever for? 

Suddenly, Chuuya’s firsts made contact against the dashboard of the arcade machine between you two- an action which caused several other patrons to inch away from you in visible fear. Normally you would have scolded Chuuya for his brash actions, now you merely glanced up at him in question. There were two tokens clutched in his fist- a frustrated demand for yet another rematch. “ Another time, this was just dumb luck, yeah! Final round and I’m gonna kick your pretty lil ass, sweets!” 

But you were not in the mood for games. 

You were bitter, angry in the way no one seemed to understand. On edge in a fashion that not even the cocktail beside you- or the alcohol in your system- could calm. You didn’t bother to plaster a fake smile on your lips as you slid off the slightly too high chair. Your heels made contact with the sticky arcade floor and you bitterly mused that Dazai would have likely moved with more grace than you had. No, he wouldn’t have needed to jump down; he was the perfect height to just slide off the stool with dignity. The thought made anger flare in your gut. Your eyes looked anywhere but at Chuuya. “ Another time, okay?  I realized I forgot something”

You caught sight of his surprised expression, the confused hurt look on his face as you turned on your heel. Of course you disappointed him; that’s all you seemed to do. Unlike Dazai who– 

You cut your trail of thoughts off and hurried out. You did not wait for his reply, did not look back at him as you stumbled out of the arcade room. Past the pool tables, pushed through the sweaty tipsy queue of other patrons who waited to order their up-tenth drink and then out into the chilly evening air. Your feet carried you faster and faster for every second, until you turned down unfamiliar streets which lead you away from Port Mafia territory. That lead you further and further away from Chuuya. 

But at that moment you did not care. Because why should you? Why had you even bothered trying in the first place? Why had you put effort into getting to know Chuuya? Why had you bothered trying to share your skills and passions when all you were to him was nothing but a replacement? A replacement for the partner who left Chuuya behind. 

A man you would never be able to surpass, and so you were doomed to forever reside in his shadows. Because no matter how hard you tried, you would never be Dazai. 

Author note: So we start off Raven's specials with a little angst. (Yes I know it's not Sunday, but I have a plan, trust me. So shhh)

Don't forget to check Raven's masterlist! and wait for the next Special ;) ©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

Over a cigarette 

Summary:  You tried to do something nice for the Mafia, for your boss, outside your job requirements and working hours. And all you asked was a little something in return. OR it took the duration of his smoke for you to go from another stupid subordinate into someone possibly interesting. 

Pairing: Subordinate reader x Boss Chuuya 

Inspired by anon request: Boss Chuuya and reader who caught Chuuya's attention.

Warnings: Cursing, Smoking cigarettes and mention of alcohol,

“ The hell you want?” 

The highest executive- the boss of the entire Port Mafia- voice did not sound amused; if anything it held an angry undertone as it boomed around the dark, narrow cobblestone alley. The old street light shone a dim yellow hue casting long, demonic like shadows behind the mafiaso. Contorted the shape of his hat and the slim cigarette into something ungodly, in the most condemned definitions of that word. 

You saw him bring the cigarette up to his lips, heard the sharp intake of breath, noticed the red glow of the ash at the tip followed by a slow controlled exhale. Then a stern; “ Do I need to repeat myself?” 

“ Are you always this peachy or did I pick the short straw?” The attempt at playfulness and teasing was ruined by the shake in your voice; the unmistakable fear. He was an exceptional man but he was also the mafia boss. Your boss’s boss. 

“ I don’t need to be fucking ‘sweet’ to lowly pawns” he took another drag of his cigarette. The simple motion that was valued above your existence; the thing that saved you from his murderous wrath. Your life was worth less than the thin nicotine stick that was salvaged with his every sharp inhale. As long as you kept yourself brief, respectful yet valued at the price of that cigarette your life would be spared. Perhaps even rewarded for your brassiness. 

You shifted from one foot to another, an action which earned you a firm stare- a warning that you’d lose said foot if you did not start talking. 

“ Did you know your men are fraternizing with the government?” Despite your fear, your voice came out firm, clearly confident in your assessment. Chuuya gave you no attention, but he did not silence you either. This meant you could proceed with your observations. This was it, your chance; all or nothing. A make it or break it for your mafia career. 

You spoke of what you saw, rambled and stumbled over words in a fiery rush that not likely made much sense in the wee hours of the night. The ending of words swallowed by the icy wind, while the content, the red thread tangled in descriptions, side thoughts, additional details that came out in a jumbled mess. You were trying to be as clear as possible- and yet you likely made as much sense as a fish riding a bicycle. 

Still he let you talk. If anything you swore he took slower, more shallow drags of his smoke. The very smoke which now rested on the bottom of his parted lips. Gorgeous lips- not that you would ever utter such thoughts to the man aloud. But where were you? Your voice grew slower as you picked your brain for additional information that was essential to your report. To your surprise the demonic man before you threw a helping probe; 

“- Strong accusations girl” his eyes narrowed dangerously, the angry glare made you shudder in your boots as the gravity of the situation weighed on you. Cold sweat ran down your back as you stood frozen until his words registered in your frightened mind. Then you instantly fumbled through your purse until half a dozen pictures made it out. In an instant you passed them onto him,in the process you almost dropped them. Almost. The flicker of his fingers over the photographs echoed in the small space between you. The meters that separated you felt far too imitate, too close for you. Never before had you stood before someone this frighteningly powerful and you wished to not repeat this nerve wracking experience ever again. Perhaps you should have stayed in your lane- ignored what you saw and kept existing within your lowly rank? Maybe even– 

“ huh, so your price?” Chuuya fixed you with a firm stare that instantly snapped you out of your self critical thoughts. The price, right, you almost forgot all about it. Saying nothing would raise suspicion- and it was not like your heart was empty of desires. 

“ A week off” your voice sounded more confident than you felt. “ I want a week to myself- I- I think it’s a fair reward for spending my only night off from work for the sake of Port Mafia- doing something above my paygrade and–” you trailed off as Chuuya took another drag of his cigarette. 

“ Damn right you went above your paygrade, stuck your nose where it didn’t fucking belong and  risked the cover of m’men” Chuuya fixed you with a firm stare just as you felt your stomach drop. Ice cold dread washed over you as your mind registered the implications behind his words. The anger not at his mens supposed betrayal but at your inability to stay within your lane. 

An overachiever who’s actions brought more troubles than positives. 

“ Were you seen?” 

You shook your head, your eyes cast down and firmly locked on your intertwined fingers as though bound by invisible chains- a prisoner before their executioner. The morbid comparison was accurate nonetheless; “ No, I left before they could recognize me as anything other than a drunken party girl” 

“ hmm” that one sound said so little and so much all at once; a hint towards your destiny. Yet he said nothing more on the matter. Precious seconds ticked away as less and less of the now-almost bud remained. 

“ So.. how badly did I fuck up?” you asked in a quiet voice, rocking back and forth on your heels. The sooner you found out, the sooner you’d know whether your foolishness had cost you your pay, any chance of upward mobility within the Mafia or your life. You shuddered at the thought of the last option, hoped he wouldn’t notice. And if he did, then he’d attribute it to your skimpy attire on the chilly Friday night. 

As if to torture you, Chuuya remained silent, took his time to flicker the gathered ash from the tip of his cigarette onto the ground before he brought the almost finished smoke back up to his lips. 

“  Next clock in’s Friday, 9 A.M sharp in my office” Chuuya stated as he took another, final, drag from his smoke“ Don’t even think about being a second late.” 

His gloved hand flickered the cigarette bud onto the ground between the two of you as you let out a yell of happiness. Before he had a change of mind- you did not believe the mafia executive had a heart- you bowed to him. Half in gratitude, half in respect.  Then you turned on your heel and ran out of the alley, not even waiting for his dismissal. 

In doing so, you miss the almost mild expression on Chuuya's face and the quiet murmur; that maybe with the right training you’d make a fine protege. 

Author note: *Yelp* finally this fic is done! Thank you Anon for your request, I really had fun writing this pair of Chuuya-boss fics. And I will definitely do more of them in the future. Hope this was worth the wait~

Liked this fic and want more? check out Raven's masterlist! Want another part? See Over a Gunshot

©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

Over a gunshot 

Summary:  When you were called into your bosses office you expected a lot of things; a mission, a punishment, maybe even death. What you did not expect was to be taught a lesson. Even less so to have to show you were able and willing to be more than just a simple dealer.. 

Pairing: Subordinate fem!Reader x Boss Chuuya 

Author note: This is an independent part two of Over a Cigarette

Warnings: Cursing, guns, violence, murder and blood, mention of being a drug dealer, 

8:58

You rocked on your feet outside the office door. Your hands sweaty, clampy, as you grasped the door knob in between shaky fingers. A deep breath, one, two. You closed your eyes for a second, sent prayers to anyone who would dare listen and hoped someone would answer them. A little luck and a ton of mercy was what you were asking for. All in all, not an all that big request- although as you stood outside your boss's boss, outside the leader of the entire Port Mafia office, you knew mercy would equate to a miracle. 

One last deep breath before you pressed down on the handle and pushed the heavy office door opened. It gave away with a squeal. 

8:59

You were hit with the pungent scent of blood. 

You froze in the doorway, breath hitched in your throat. Your eyes locked at the boss seated at the heavy desk. Curtains drawn shut behind him, making the bright red glow that surrounded him that much more prominent. 

Ominous. 

Murderous. 

Like staring the devil in the face. A handsomely twisted face outline with the deadly red hue. The hue which made the blue of his eyes stand out all the more. His lips parted into a twisted grin at the sight of you. One gloved hand raised, while the second tapped the fountain pen against a stack of papers- undoubtedly reports. It was a custom one, parker if you weren’t mistaken and you swore you could see a hint of golden engraving on its body. Chuuya finished writing the sentence before he set the pen back into its stand beside the black digital clock. Even the innocent red letters were unsettling. They added to the morbidity of the situation. 

“ I-is it a bad time?” you stammered out as another whiff of blood reached your senses. You felt your stomach drop in fear, felt how your hand on the doorknob  shook. You kept your eyes firmly on the Mafia boss, on his calm composure and the menaced red. You were afraid. No, you were more than afraid- petrified. You did not dare look around to see where that metallic scent came from. 

“ You’re on time, get in here and close the door behin’ you” Chuuya stated as his hand readjusted the position of the fountain pen in its holder. Your eyes followed the gloved hands moment. 

You swallowed thickly. Your eyes landed back on the clock. Saw the seconds tick away painfully slowly until the digits changed. A screech came from the device; it broke you out of your trance. This ungodly sound dedicated to your arrival- a confirmation that you followed his order to the minute. 

You stepped inside Chuuya’s office and closed the door behind you to the sound of the blaring alarm. Your eyes never once left the clock. This Friday morning would forever be engraved in your memory. The once in your lifetime when being  on time undoubtedly saved your life; but also meant you were right on time to see your future change.

9:00 

The sound of a pained groan drew your attention away from the clock and your eyes flickered in that direction. You gasped, your hand flew up to your face in horror. Five men you had seen but a week ago drinking away at a pub were on their knees. The five you had taken a picture of. But it was the sixth man who made your blood run cold; the familiar face of your boss. The very man who brought you into the mafia. But-but why? Your eyes shifted back to Chuuya’s cocky expression.

“ What?! But you said-” 

“ I know what I said” he cut you off promptly “ Lesson one; never trust an executive’s words at face value. Especially outside closed doors. If I say ‘don’t hold back’ then–” he motioned for you to finish his sentence 

“ .. then show restraint?” your voice came out small. 

“ And if I say innocent” realization slowly dawned on you. It made you feel stupid for not thinking of that possibility sooner. Still despite your nod of affirmation, he forced you to say those words out loud.

“ - then they’re guilty traitors” Your eyes landed back on the men kneeling on the floor. Beaten, bruised and surrounded by the red ability which kept them pinned in place. Barely breathing, not moving, definitely glaring. In too much pain to do anything but to grind their teeth together and just-breathe. 

“ Port Mafia has no place for rats.” You heard the drawer open and flicked your eyes in Chuuya’s direction just as he threw something towards you. A red-hued gun which landed almost softly in your hands. 

You nearly dropped it but caught yourself at the last second. Who knew what he would do to you if you damaged his property. 

“ What? Never held a gun before?” Chuuya’s tone was mocking, accompanied by a roll of his eyes. Then his expression shifted into disbelief as you shook your head. “ What kind of fuckin’ mafia are you if you can’t even handle a gun, girl!” 

“ A bootlegger” you mumbled almost ashamedly. You had hoped that your sign of loyalty would get you higher in the ranks; maybe even your own clientele with a set of runners to watch over. Not- not this. 

“ Ehh? Well in that case there’s no harm in showing you how ‘ts done” Chuuya stood up from his seat and strolled over to you. 

Each step a deafening sound that made the soon to be dead men more rigid.

Each step filled you with dread; your stomach turned, heart hammered in your ears while the vile taste of bile echoed in just the back of your throat. 

Each step he took made the gravity of the situation hit you that much harder. 

“ W-Wait-”

You took a step back but Chuuya did not let you run. With a rough tug of your wrist he brought you himself, placed your shaking body in front of him. Your back against his chest, arms on either side of you. Skilled hands grasped yours, with the glock between. 

“ This here, you pull back, then push the cartridge here to reload-” his motion was fluid; he cocked the gun with ease as if it were second nature then raised your arms up so you aimed at one of the men. “ And none of that Hollywood one hand bullshit- both hands, steady. And then–” you let out a scream as he pulled the trigger with your finger. 

The gunshot made your ears ring. The body- the way it flopped to the floor was deafening. You heaved, dropped your arms back to your side. Your world was spinning, mind raced. You were— Chuuya grasped a fistfull of your hair and pulled you back up into an upright position. 

“ Get a fuckin grip and reload it” his voice a dangerous hiss in your ear; a knee between your legs propped you up. You shook your head, words of protest on your tongue that you couldn’t get past your lips. You hiccupped, shook like a leaf and if it weren’t for his fingers holding the glock in your hands you’d have dropped it long ago “Tsk, fine show you again, but better pay goddamn attention”  

He repeated the motion again, slower, made sure you watched his every move before he raised the gun a second time and aimed it at the man in the middle. His choice made your eyes widen;“ Now shoot him” 

“ N-No”  you flicked backwards, subconsciously pressing yourself up against Chuuya’s chest. “ He is my boss” 

“ Was” Chuuya corrected in a heartbeat. “ I am your boss. Where’s your bloody loyalty anyways?” His hands moved from your hands to your arms steadying your hold. 

Despite yourself and everything in your mind that screamed that you couldn’t fucking  kill anyone you kept the gun raised. Eyes firm on the man who had been your boss for so many years. 

“ I did so much for you, you goddamn brat and you had to blabber your ugly mouth” Your old boss wheezed; a clear intention of making this as painful for you as possible. Each pet name, each memory, each helping hand he had stretched towards you made your hands shake just a little more. Your old boss was someone you hated and admired, who forced you to grow up but also showed you a rare instance of kindness. He held an important position in your life. Although you would never admit it- never dear indulge in those thoughts but he always had and always would hold a fragment of your heart in the palm of his hand. 

But were you such a good person that you’d sacrifice your own life for your morale? Were you so righteous that you’d accept being tortured and murdered for a soon to be deadman? Memories and old loyalty- or to survive and get revenge. 

You took a steadying breath. Flickered your eyes away from the cursing, spluttering man and moved your gaze to your right.  Subconsciously your eyes were drawn to the dark red letters of the digital clock on Chuuya’s table. The time registered in your mind- forever engraved just like the angry betrayed look on your bosses- no old family, old friends face. 

 9:36 

The second gunshot echoed through the base. 

Author note: No one asked for a part two of Over a Cigarette but this is exactly what you guys got, yelp. Well if you're still here, reading this, I'm not sure what to say? Have a cookie? And I hope you enjoyed it! Not your cup of tea? Well I have a ton more works that you can check out instead by viewing Raven's masterlist!

Until next time! ©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

A caring gesture 

Summary: “Okay, imagine it's Valentine day, and somehow dazai forget it was today (yes this smartass actually forget about it). But you did him the most incredible surprise when he gets back”

Pairing: reader x Dazai

Requested by: @avocate-assia-dazai Thank you so much for participating in Raven's special and sending me this request.

Warnings: Light cursing, Dazai fluff.

Hope you enjoy~

Dazai hated abroad missions; leaving early in the morning and coming home sometime in the wee hours of the night.  His body ached, bruised and beaten while his mind remained foggy, the lack of sleep and the jetlag that came with being awake for over forty eight hours. 

Ahh if only sleep deprivation could grant him the sweet release of death, then Dazai would never utter another complaint. Or maybe precious relief from this plagued life would appear just as his body finally made contact with the all-too welcoming couch of the ADA- the perfect place to slack the remainder of his shift before he could bounce away to your apartment. Yes, just another two steps- one step and Dazai flung his body onto the familiar couch, salvaged its sweet fragrance, soft cushions, fluffy blanket and red velvet material– wait why was it red? 

Instantly Dazai was up on his feet. 

His eyes narrowed as he stared down at the thing which replaced his all too familiar resting spot. Not only was this couch larger and covered in red velvet covers but it was filled with several fluffy blankets in white and pink. The precious space held several heart shaped pillows and on the armrest was a card yet-to-be-placed inside its matching envelope. Happy Valentines Day it said on the front of it, Valentines- Dazai’s eyes widened in realization and frustration as he ran a bandaged hand over his face. Of course, how could he have forgotten? You were talking about it just before he left for the mission, making plans for- for today. Hearing the door to the ADA open Dazai rubbed tiredly at his eyes; the sound of your click clack shoes made a part of him want to hide while another part of him dreaded seeing you. Tiredness washed over him like pulsating headache- hurting him almost as much as the difficult conversation he was expecting to have with you. 

In his experience women did not handle missed valentines well. Surely you’d be no exception, 

“ Oh you’re back early ‘samu” you sounded almost awkward as you came closer and closer to him. Instead of wrapping your arms around him however you stopped a few paces away and let out a low disappointed sigh “ Damn and here I had hoped dinner would arrive before you got back” 

Your words made Dazai’s head snap up and turn to face you, only to see you holding a stack of paperwork in your hands. His paperwork. Which you carefully placed on the couch side table before taking a seat. 

The action made Dazai frown, unsure whether he was seeing the situation correctly. “ Belladonna?” he asked cautiously as he watched you sorting the papers, a concentrated frown on your lips. 

“ hmmm? Sorry, you’ll have to wait a little for dinner. BUT I think it will be here in an hour or so,do you wanna get some rest in the meantime?” he watched, the way you looked up and him a small reassuring smile before going back to the task at hand. 

Cautiously, like a wild animal Dazai inched closer before taking a seat beside you. Careful fingers trailed from your shoulder down your arm. His expression guarded “ It’s Valentine's day today” 

“ I know” you reply picking your next words carefully “ I also know you’ve just returned from abroad so I thought our grand plans could wait until the weekend when–” You didn’t get to finish your sentence as Dazai’s arms snaked around you before pulling you down with him into a lying position. Long legs intertwined with yours, face buried in the crook of your neck. His hold around you was tight, somehow more clingy than usual.

“ Thank you, Bella” Dazai whispered in a rare sign of vulnerable affection, “ Now stay like this while I sleep, I’ll make it up to you later.. please?” and all you could do was nod, not daring to shift in case you disturbed your already half-asleep lover. 

This was not how you two had planned to spend your Valentines together, but judging by Dazai’s actions he didn’t mind the change of plans too much. And neither did you. 

Author note: Happy Valentines day! I hope this request fullfilled your expectations. Stay tuned for the next update in another four hours.

Hope you enjoyed 🩷

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©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

A Lucid Reality 

Summary: In which you are aware that you and Chuuya can never be in the normal sense of a “couple” but that doesn’t mean Chuuya won’t be there to comfort and protect you. Even if it means he has to visit you through a dream..

Pairing: Reader x partner/lover Chuuya

Inspired by “A month of Sweetness” Sneak peak prompt 1: Dream 

Warnings: Cursing, hurt/comfort,

Enjoy~

“ What’s the matter sweetheart?” Chuuya’s voice was deliberately quiet, barely above a whisper. Yet it managed to echo around the small living room in an almost deafening fashion. “ Hard day?” 

You didn’t reply.

Your gaze was focused somewhere in the distance, an empty space in the otherwise filled-to-the-brim room, the combination of your and Chuuya’s things, a messy awkwardly stuffed combination of your and Chuuya’s things. Some of which were duplicates; same cups, similar notebooks. furoshiki with half wrapped gifts and accidentally identical omiyage. Others were personal, a packet of cigarettes peeking out atop a box full of folders, dozens of plushies in all shapes and sizes; private pictures sliding out of albums and clothes. His pristine black coat draped over a box, your worn out one tossed carelessly to the floor right in front of you. 

Your mind was in a place far away from the safety and comfort of your dream home. Drifting in and out of reality with every syllable that dropped past his lips; some moments awkwardly aware of his presence, other times painfully aware of his absence. 

“ Goddamn it, are you even listening to me, Y/N?” He was close to yelling, yet the amplitude seemed the same. The words echoed around the space just as loud as his earlier whisper“ Y/N?”  

“ You’re not here” you sighed and brought the tear stained pillow closer to yourself; placing it in your lap, you wrapped your arms tightly around it in a feeble attempt to mimic a hug. Then you rested your head on top of it. A sigh escaped your lips as you felt the cursed thing deflate under your touch, as if avoiding you. 

An inanimate object too, huh?

“ Sweetheart..” you heard him breath out but you ignored it. The same as you ignored the way his lips pulled down into a frown, the look on his face turned serious. His arms crossed over his chest, eyes a fixed stare at your feeble form on the couch. He was telling you- no ordering you to look at him. Yet all you did was focus more on the spot behind his shoulder. 

Chuuya sighed; an exasperated sound that came from the soul before he pushed himself from the wall. He approached you slowly, as if in hope that you’d turn to face him with a bright smile and say you were fine. That you would make it- that you didn’t need him today. That you were going to be strong without him. 

Instead you remained silent, and he all too obediently sat down on the edge of the couch beside you. His body turned to face you, worried blue orbs running up and down your form. The edges of his lips twitched, as if he wanted to say something but could not bring himself to. 

 “ You are not actually here.” your words were accompanied with a sigh and the burning behind your eyelids. What you would do to have him beside you and yet you knew better than anyone it was nothing but an impossibility.

 A foolish dream from a foolish girl that would never amount to anything good. 

“ Does it matter sweetheart?” Chuuya asked as he took his hat off and studied it in his hands- something to do that didn’t entail staring at you. 

You scoffed, finally shifting your gaze from the wall and onto him. You were met with a gentle smile, clearly pleased that he had your attention. Your look however was less than amused; “ How can you even ask that? Of course it matters!” 

“ It shouldn’t”

You gaped at him. Your mouth opened and closed like a fish as all sorts of mean exclamations ran through your mind. What did he take you for? Why did he think it wouldn’t matter whether he was there with you or not? How dare he assume you would just-

“ Dollface I don’t have to be with you every second of every day to be ‘here’” Chuuya rolled his eyes. At your raised eyebrow he leaned closer, his gloved hand on your cheek, a ghost of a sensation on your skin. His lips pulled up into a boyish grin, mischief radiated off of it. 

“ C’mon don’t give me that; no self respected man can stay with their lover every second of every day, there’s work, life and other shit. This isn’t much different” Chuuya shrugged ever so slightly. You bit the inside of your cheek, holding back the half rude remark that even long-distance lovers had more than what you two shared. 

As if he read your thoughts, Chuuya’s smirk widened ever so slightly. “ Please sweets, we can talk and I can touch you. Long distance doesn’t have that” he then chuckled, his look turned even more mischievous. Suddely he leaned closer to your ear; “ And we both know I can rock your world even without 'touching you'” he purred then nipped your earlobe.  

“ Chuuya!” you gasped, your face flushed red. Your blush moved onto tomato-shade as his chuckle echoed around you. Still he held onto your face, not letting you pull too far away or look anywhere but him, anywhere but the sincere blue of his eyes. 

“ I can protect you sweetheart” he breathed suddenly, the words a tiny whisper inches from your lips, reserved only for you and your ears. If it wasn't so silent you'd have missed them “ I can guide you, but you need to put in the work my darlin” 

At the word ‘work’ you sighed heavily, your shoulders dropped in surrender. You closed your eyes and leaned into his touch. You salvaged the sensation of his thumb as it brushed your cheek, and the faint warmth against your face with his every breath. If you closed your eyes and disregarded logic then you could fool yourself into believing that this was a reality. The reality you needed the most at that very moment. The caring sensation of his lips on your skin, the salvation of his breath on yours. Affection with no strings attached; attention that was reserved for you and only you. Not to be shared with another; not to be taken away for a little mistaken or some other reason entirely out of your control. Not to be responsible for anyone but yourself. 

In here you were safe and not so very alone. 

Suddenly Chuuya pulled back, his lips leaving your skin. The warmth of his leather glove, a ghost of a touch, gone. The action made you whine and open your eyes, a silent plea not to stop. Just a minute- a second longer. Please.

“ Sweetheart” Chuuya leaned forward again until your foreheads connected, a grave expression on his face. “ You need to wake up” 

“ W-what?” 

“ You need to wake up Sweets; right NOW!” 

You opened your eyes with a startle just in time to hear the click of your front door lock giving away. Your heart in your throat; your mind vaguely registering that you were alone and were not expecting visitors at this hour. 

Author note: I was asked for some Chuuya sweetness/comfort and so peeked out of my studying to tease ya'll with this little thing. And what is it? Well this is a little sneak peek of a set of prompts i’m releasing in late March/April called “ A month of Sweetness” which will focus entirely on comfort, fluff and sweetness. A loving Chuuya, a protective Dazai and more. So stay tuned for those.

Until then, if you liked this fic and want more of my work: check out Raven's masterlist!

©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

Responsibility to love 

Summary: After witnessing a difficult birth Dazai struggles with himself and his emotions over becoming a new parent- a distant dream that his mind denied up until now OR men react differently to seeing their babies for the first time; some are natural parents while others… 

Pairing: New parents! fem! Reader x  Dazai (x Chuuya)  

Inspired by Sweetober prompt 18: Sick 

Warnings: Angst,  Male postpartum depression including dislike and hesitant to accept the children,  Mention of difficult childbirth, cursing, 

There was a strange taste in his mouth; it wasn’t sweet like love or salty like disgust. It was a rather bitter flavor with just the tiniest hints of pungent somewhere in the back of his throat. A burning acidic kind which felt like it would corrode his neck- his vocal cords into mush if he said nothing. 

Yet no words came out.

He wanted to scream and yell, to call every doctor at this godforsaken place an incompetent delusional imbecile. He wanted to threaten them, see the cocky expression in their eyes slowly fade away into horror as he made their minds torture themselves into oblivion. Osamu Dazai  wanted to make them suffer unimaginable pain for lying to him, for calling this— this as good news. As everything being ‘better than expected’. Happy turn of events. Something to cheer and celebrate, not mourn and fret. The worst was over, they claimed in cheerful tones, now all that was left was letting nature and nurture run its natural course. And yet–

You looked so small, so frail. 

Resting his forehead against the glass that separated your room from the rest of the maternity ward, Dazai heaved a big sigh. The bitter, salty, sour sensation twisting the edges of his mouth down into a frown. This was suffocating. Disgusting at best. And yet— 

His eyes shifted to the orange haired idiot who looked like he was in seventh heaven. Chuuya was bouncing around your small hospital room in excitement. He was moving between your bed, muttering praises or stroking your hair with a gloved finger. Then over to the two bassinets just a few paces away. The joint construction which looked more like a plastic box on wheels with some blankets inside than a medical equipment there to monitor the newly born beings. The small wrapped up bundles. Bright red faces, white wrappings for the girl, blue for the boy. 

Dazai couldn’t help but think the newborns were ugly. They looked nothing like You, Chuuya or himself. Just red bunches of meat; alien looking creatures that were mostly bold and scrinkly with eyes that didn’t fit the rest of their features. The only semi positive thing he could say about them was that they had screamed loudly when they were born, yet now had enough self-preservation instinct to just be silent. 

He watched with a frown how Chuuya cooed and gawked at the babies for an awfully long amount of time, ignoring the way you looked. The worn out expression on your face, forehead sticky with sweat and the slight shiver of your body as you desperately tried to come to terms with the difficult birth.  You looked like you could use some water- something to snack on. A caring touch, a warm hand. Maybe a professional assessment, definitely some strong drugs. You looked so lonely and small, so tired that all Dazai wanted to do was go in there and scoop you up in his arms. Yet he was too cowardly; too ashamed and guilty to go back in there. Afraid that you’d read him like an open book; see all the emotion, all the turmoil and regret on his face. The lack of a smile, of happiness, on his being. And just see him for what he was; a man who desperately wished to go back in time and hammer into your younger selves to be more thorough with using protection. 

The pungent taste became stronger, almost unbearable. 

He watched with the same frown as Chuuya picked up the children one by one and brought them over to your bed. Watched the weak smile you’d give each twin, then a kiss on their foreheads- a task that seemed to take the very last of your energy as you leaned back against the pillows of your hospital bed. Dazai’s name was the last thing on your lips- he could read it even from this distance and his heart clenched painfully in his chest- before he saw you close your eyes.  In moments- seconds- your breathing became slower and deeper. Dazai didn’t know whether you fell asleep or actually passed out. And it almost amazed him how little Chuuya seemed to care about your condition; giving you a single kiss on your hair before moving away. Not checking your pulse, not checking your breathing and just trusting that the instruments monitoring you worked. 

The ginger's focus and attention was clearly elsewhere. 

Dazai observed Chuuya closely as if he were a strange animal and not the reflection of how he himself should be behaving; the bright smile, the energy and excitement all over as Chuuya rocked the twins in his arms seemingly unable to get enough of them. That was how he was supposed to act- to be in there right beside Chuuya bickering over who got to hold which twin. To be joyful and grateful and so utterly in love and yet-

Dazai prayed that those balls of red meat were Chuuya’s- prayed that they didn’t come from his seed. He didn’t think he’d be able to live with himself if he had hurt you this way- that something that came from him put you in such a dire state. That something from him almost tore you away from this world. He selfishly prayed that he was not at fault, even if he knew deep down that he was. And if you had died- then your blood would have been on his hands as if he’d killed you himself.  

Dazai swallowed thickly, the taste in his mouth unbearable. He felt somewhere between crying, throwing up, and passing out. Yet his body was frozen in place, forehead against the glass window, staring at the sight inside. Silently suffering- definitely hating himself. He watched helplessly as Chuuya finally took notice of him and strolled up to the door that separated Dazai from his partners. The flimsy door that kept the ungrateful monster at bay. 

The click of the lock before he opened it was more deafening and humiliating to Dazai than forgetting to cock a glock. 

“ Heeh bandages don’t you wanna hold him?” Chuuya stretched out the infant towards Dazai, still wearing that stupid shit-eating-grin on his face. 

He didn’t. By god he didn’t. Dazai didn’t want to touch anything that almost cost you your life. He didn’t want to get close to it. He didn’t want to be near it. 

Still he held out his shaking bandaged hands which Chuuya adjusted before placing the small thing into them. A part of Dazai was surprised how heavy the infant was. Especially since it was so frail. It would take very little for him to harm this small thing in his arms. To smoosh it into nothingness. Like a bug.

Dazai brought the infant closer to himself, running his eyes over every inch of him. Trying desperately to find something likable about this clump of cells, wrapped in bones and flesh that you almost died for. That made Chuuya so happy. 

After all, it was his responsibility to love it.

Authors Note: For those of you who have read "Desperate times call for Desperate measures" This is very loosely connected to it. And although that fic has a more traditional post-partum depression element to it, this fic is more focused on the male side of becoming a parent. While doing research I realized how little the male PPD was discussed so here we are now. Think of this work as a prequel if you like. ... damn now I feel almost sorry for them...

Anyhow hope you enjoyed! If you liked my works feel free to check out Raven's Masterlist

Until next time~