#once i lost a carton of milk in the fridge and genuinely stood there for like an hour i was later told trying to find it. and then | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

merakiaes · 4 years

Text

Familia - Oscar “Spooky” Diaz

Pairing: Oscar “Spooky” Diaz x reader

Requested: Yes.

Prompts: None.

Warnings/notes: Warning for slight OOC-Spooky and a change of the series’ original plot and storyline. There’s soe Spanish in here so you might have to look some phrases and words up. This took me nearly four days to complete so please leave a comment and let me know what you think. This is definitely too long to be proofread so I apologize in advance for any possible mistakes. I hope you like it xx

Wordcount: 30,766 (Yup, you read that right)

Summary: You and Oscar have been together since you were seventeen, with a four-year-old daughter and another child on the way. When Ray returns after being absent from his sons’ lives for twelve entire years, tension is awakened between everyone and you’re determined not to let your family fall apart.

Quick, Spanish words blended together with the bubbling sounds of the coffee maker on this early morning in the Diaz residence, filling the otherwise silent air.

You could make out the faint sound of the clock on the kitchen wall and through the open window right where you were standing, you could hear the early birds chirping and the leaves of the trees rustling with a light breeze.

The smell of coffee was invading your senses and the fresh air coming in through the window pulled at your hair where you stood by the sink, washing the plate Oscar had eaten his breakfast from only minutes before, but the warmth from the sunrays hitting your face and bare arms made up for the chilly morning breeze.

The man in question was sitting at the kitchen table with his phone pressed to his ear, speaking to Sad Eyes and waiting for the coffee you had promised to bring him when he had to answer the call.

He had, of course, protested, saying that you shouldn’t be doing as much work around the house as you did when you were heavily pregnant, but when hearing what his second in command had to say he had sat down pretty quickly.

The sound of his voice and the feeling of genuine peace this morning was enough to make you smile as you cut off the water and gave the plate a good shake before grabbing a towel and drying it off.

Once the surface was squeaky clean, or well, as clean as it could be with the deep, grey fork scratches from the frequent use, you put it back into its cabinet and brought down Oscar’s black coffee mug.

The bubbling of the coffee maker had quietened down by now, indicating that the coffee was done and ready to be consumed, and you wasted no time in filling the cup up to near the brim, only saving a little bit of space.

The cup was now releasing a cloud of steam that went all the way up to your face, causing your skin to grow damp.

But you paid it no mind, simply walking over to the refrigerator where you brought the open carton of milk out, briefly putting the mug down on the counter in order to be able to open it and pour some in.

Once you were done, you put the milk back into the fridge and grabbed the mug again, not letting your eyes leave it even once as you carefully waddled over to the table where Oscar was sitting, not wanting to spill the coffee on the floor.

You might have filled it a little too generously and it wasn’t the easiest of tasks so balance it when you could barely balance yourself on your feet with the weight of your round belly, but you managed, reaching Oscar within the next few seconds.

He looked up at you the second he saw you approaching. Once you reached him, the hand that wasn’t holding the phone reached out for your belly, pressing against it protectively before taking the steaming hot cup of coffee from your hand.

You smiled softly, wiping your hands on the front of your jeans to rid them of the little coffee you had spilled while waddling over from the kitchen.

“You heard anything from Cesar yet?” You asked, keeping your voice down to not disturb his call.

You watched as he took a gulp of the coffee before shaking his head, mouthing ‘no’ as he listened to Sad Eyes speak on the other side of the line, all while holding eye-contact with you.

When you had gone to wake Cesar up, you had found his bed empty like you had so many other mornings before. Him sneaking out when you were sleeping to go sneak into Monse’s house wasn’t a rare occurrence.

Still, especially now when you were pretty much constantly controlled by your hormones, the motherly worry came naturally whenever he wasn’t safe at your side. But you were sure he was fine. If he wasn’t, Oscar would have known. He could always sense when his mano was in danger.

Dropping the subject, guessing he would show up before going to school, you wordlessly leaned down to kiss Oscar’s cheek before leaving him to his call and coffee again, instead heading towards your shared bedroom.

Reaching the door, you grabbed the handle and carefully pushed it open, peeking your head inside.

The room was dark, the blinds still down, but just enough light managed to escape in through the cracks of said blinds to allow you to see your daughter where she laid in yours and Oscar’s bed.

She was laying facing the door, her long, black locks spread out in a mess over the white pillow, her chest rising and falling with soft snores leaving her nose and her thumb sucked into her mouth.

The sight of her never failed to make your heart skip a beat in your chest, just when it did when you saw Oscar. Neither of you had lived very happy lives but she was the greatest gift God ever could have given you.

You had met Oscar when you were both no older than seventeen, and Cesar ten. You had both been in a really bad place, with Oscar struggling to carry an entire gang on his back while simultaneously having to raise his brother and with you jumping between your friends in a desperate attempt to flee the system you had been forced into at an early age.

To a start, your relationship had only been about a warm body to hold when things got too heavy and you couldn’t go through it alone.

Oscar wasn’t too fond of feelings and lovey-dovey shit and always had to show himself as hard and emotionally unavailable, and you… well, you just didn’t trust very easily.

But when you started staying over after your nightly fun and he saw you with Cesar in the mornings, he couldn’t help but fall head over heels in love with you, and when he started inviting you over for activities that didn’t include rolling around in the sheets, your feelings started developing for him too.

You never officially moved in with them, but you never really left either. You started making sure that three meals a day was on the table for them and started taking initiative to walk Cesar to and home from school when Oscar got caught up with disobeying the law.

A year later, you were playing house and happy family pretty much on a routine with little to no effort at all, everything coming naturally.

The Santos accepted you into the family, Cesar looked up to you like you were his mother despite the fact that you were only seven years older and Oscar was already planning on spending the rest of his life with you.

On your eighteenth birthday, he gifted you a promise ring and kept an identical one for himself. He wasn’t one to get all cute and mushy and this time was no different, but you knew it was a big step for him to take so the way he handled it didn’t really matter.

It had been one of the best days of your life. Not only were you now claimed by Spooky, but you were also free from the system and free to be your own individual, and on the same night you found out that you were pregnant and expecting your first child together.

But of course with your luck, the happiness was short-lived.

The next night, Oscar was arrested and sentenced to four years in prison, leaving you and Cesar alone. Of course, you still had the Santos to provide for you. Oscar being gone didn’t change the fact that you were a part of the family.

But you didn’t like having them around the house when Oscar wasn’t there so the only one you really hung out with was Sad Eyes, who came by a few times a week to check up on you and leave you a roll of cash for rent, food and other necessities.

How exactly they got the money you didn’t know, neither Oscar nor Sad Eyes liking to involve you into the gang-business, but you didn’t ask questions.

You went to visit Oscar in prison every Tuesday, Sad Eyes and Mario taking turns driving you while Cesar stayed at the Martinez residence until you got home when he was still too young to be left home alone.

Cesar never went to visit him in person, though. Oscar didn’t want him to have to see him stuck behind that thick glass in that awful jumpsuit, so he only ever talked to him over the phone once or twice a week.

During your pregnancy, Mario was there for you every day and you managed to become really good friends which you knew Oscar was forever grateful for.

There weren’t many people the infamous Spooky respected and trusted, but Mario was one of them and he was happy that you were able to hang around someone on the right side of the law.

After first hearing about your blooming friendship when Mario had driven you to visitation day the first time, Oscar more or less forced the slightly younger guy to go with you to all of your ultrasounds from then on, wanting him to witness everything that he was missing so that he could re-tell it to him during visitation.

Mario was too scared to turn him down so he made sure he was free to accompany you to all of your check-ups and by the time you were approaching the end of your pregnancy, you had lost count of the amount of time Mario had been mistaken for the dad.

Much to his horror, he had been forced to be present at the time of birth, as well. Geny Martinez was there too at your request and she was able to keep her calm, having gone through the procedure of childbirth before, but the seventeen-year-old Mario had never been as terrified as he was then.

Still, he forced himself to sit through it in order to be able to tell Oscar about it at the next visitation, during which you brought him pictures of your baby girl and decided on a name.

It took a while to get on the same page, but after a good half hour of bickering back and forth, you finally managed to decide on the name Lucía with a helpful input from Mario who had been sitting by and listening to your fighting in silence up until then.

You had been planning to talk to Oscar about making Mario Lucía’s godfather after that, something you hadn’t told Mario yet.

But before you could even mention it, Oscar, much to yours and Mario’s surprise, was the one to bring the topic up, telling him it was only right after how much he had been there for his baby mama when he couldn’t.

And of course, Mario gladly accepted, basically jumping with happiness when you left that afternoon.

Him and his family continued to be there for you now that you didn’t only have Cesar to care for, but a newborn baby, as well.

It was all overwhelming to you, all of the sudden having so many people jumping at the chance to help you when you had grown up all on your own.

You continued to visit Oscar on your own, bringing him new pictures and stories every time, but you never brought Lucía to see him.

You wanted him to meet his daughter and you knew that he wanted nothing more in the entire world than to do so, but he didn’t want her first memory of him to be of him in prison, much like he hadn’t wanted Cesar to see him like that.

So you had no other choice but to respect his wishes, instead showing your daughter pictures of her father every day as she grew bigger, to put a face to the man she would be calling daddy when he got out.

And his sign-out day was soon upon you, four entire years later. Both you and Oscar were twenty-two at the time, Cesar fifteen and Lucía had just turned three.

Four entire years he had gone without touching you or seeing his mano face to face, but that was nothing in comparison to the three years he had been forced to endure knowing he had a daughter waiting for him on the outside, a daughter he had never gotten to meet.

He didn’t show it, but he was so nervous that he almost threw up on the spot when he came out of the building inside which he had been locked up for the past four years, to see you standing in front of his red Impala with Lucía balanced on your hip.

She had smiled upon seeing his familiar face, recognizing it from the pictures you had shown her every day, and stretched her arms out for him with a gleeful laugh.

That was the first time since meeting him that you had seen him cry, tears welling up in his eyes as he took his daughter into his arms, felt her skin against his for the first time ever.

You had stayed there, in the middle of the parking lot, for a good ten minutes. He had been holding her so carefully, not moving an inch, almost as if he was scared that he would break her if he did.

Once he finally broke free from his trance and managed to relax, he had taken you to the beach where you spent your first ever hour together, eating ice cream and watching the waves.

It had been perfect, but also very comical.

Oscar obviously knew how to be a father. He had raised his brother on his own throughout his entire teenage years, and all he really had to do was the exact opposite of what his dad had.

But he had absolutely no idea how to handle a baby, so to say it had been hilarious to see him chasing after Lucía as she, in turn, chased after a couple of seagulls, was the biggest understatement of the century.

He had been so careful with her, so wary and pretty much walking around on eggshells the entire time you spent together. And when she fell and started crying, he was at an absolute loss of what to do.

But then he picked her up, held her against his chest, and she stopped crying immediately, nuzzling her face into his neck and wrapping her short arms around him, and he was absolutely gone in the sudden burst of love he felt.

Ever since then, he barely left her alone, and you knew it was only going to get worse as she grew older. You didn’t even want to think about how protective he would get when she started getting interested in boys.

You loved her to bits but Oscar… the love he held for her was on an entirely different level. He would throw himself into the line of fire to take a bullet for you, but for her, for her he would burn down entire cities if he had to.

He was in love with you and had been since the moment you first met, but it was in her that he had found his true happiness and that, in turn, only made you even more happy.

The sound of a car door slamming shut somewhere out on the street suddenly cut through the air and you jumped in fright, a hand automatically flying to clutch your chest in an attempt to calm your racing heart.

You had gotten so lost in your train of thought that you had no idea how long you had been standing there for.

You shook yourself back to reality and sent a final glance to your sleeping daughter before you carefully closed the door again, allowing her to sleep in. You left a small crack open in the door so that you would be able to hear her if she woke up and cried for you, and headed back into the living room area of the house.

Oscar was still sitting where you left him, his back turned to you where he sat at the table.

His eyes met yours as you re-entered the room and he started saying goodbye to Sad Eyes on the phone, only a second later removing the phone from his ear to end the call on the screen.

As he did so, you approached him from behind, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and leaning your head down to press a kiss to the side of his neck, breathing in the intoxicating smell of his skin and kneading his shoulders with your hands gently.

“Everything okay?” You questioned and he hummed, raising the now almost empty cup of coffee to his lips to take a gulp while putting his phone down on the table.

Just then, the front door slammed open, causing both of you to jump with surprise and look over to where Cesar had now barged into the house, his eyes wide with worry.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Cesar yelled out, head looking around in search for his brother for a second before finding you at the table, then walking up to you while pointing his thumb behind him. “There’s a dude posted up outside!”

You tensed at the sound of his words, your hand instantly going to your belly, and Oscar wasted no time in standing up from his seat.

“Baby?” You questioned, and he turned to you, pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead, hand on top of your own where it rested on your stomach.

“Wait inside, mamas.” He instructed before turning around and grabbing his gun from on top of the cupboard standing in the corner and marching outside, cocking the gun as he walked through the doorway and out into the sunshine.

You exchanged a look with Cesar and as usual, before you could even think to stop him, he did the exact opposite of what he was told and rushed after his brother.

“Get back inside!” You could hear Oscar yell at him almost immediately and he did as told, backing into the doorway again and looking back at you.

Curiosity got the best of you when you still hadn’t heard any threats or gunshots from outside and you waddled up to your future brother-in-law, holding on to his arm while you attempted to peek outside.

His hand came up to grab yours and together, you slowly moved a few steps further out on the porch.

Your eyes instantly found Oscar where he was standing on the lawn, body tensed up. And then your eyes flickered over to where he was looking, finding a man standing around on the other side of the street by a tree.

He was wearing a white tank top and blue jeans with a belt, had black, slicked-back hair, a big tattoo running across his chest with a few smaller ones on his arms. He was smoking a cigarette, leaning against the tree as him and Oscar stared each other down, and he had a bag waiting at the ground beside him.

It didn’t take longer than a few seconds for you to connect the dots and recognize the man from Oscar’s stories, figuring his identity out almost immediately.

But Cesar was clueless, taking another step forward and losing his grip on you in the process, looking between his brother and the stranger with confused, brown eyes.

“Oscar?” He called out, taking another step closer to him. “Who is that?”

The man’s eyes moved from Oscar to Cesar as he made himself known, and even though you couldn’t see Oscar’s face right then, you knew him good enough to know that he was glaring.

“Our father.” He answered without missing a beat, confirming your suspicions.

Cesar froze in his spot, his eyes turning slightly wider, while Oscar turned his head to the side and tucked the gun into the hem of his shorts, turning around to come back inside.

He shoved past Cesar who was still standing rooted to his spot, and you reached your hand out to grab his arm once he reached you in the doorway.

“Baby.” You mumbled, pulling him to you, and he made no move to stop you, his hand simply coming to rest on your belly and his forehead pressing against yours as you backed into the house together.

“I thought I told you to stay inside.” He muttered, annoyed, but his touch was as soft as ever, not threatening in the slightest.

“I know, I’m sorry…” You apologized quietly, looking up at him hesitantly. “Should I put on some more coffee?”

His soft eyes turned stern. “No. He’s not staying.” He told you surely, shutting the subject down.

You nodded silently and sat down with him in the sofa, Cesar coming in and sitting down beside you with his father in tow a few seconds later.

While you and Oscar sat close to each other in the furthest corner of the couch, his arm wrapped around your shoulders, Cesar sat at the opposite corner, his elbows leaning on his thighs and his legs manspreading just like his older brother’s were beside you.

Ray’s eyes instantly found you where you were sitting, flickering between Oscar’s face to yours, and along to Oscar’s hand that was still resting protectively on your belly, thumb absentmindedly rubbing soothing circles through the fabric of your shirt and sporting a thick, golden wedding band identical to the one on your ring finger.

A look of shock momentarily crossed over his face, but he quickly covered it up, dropping his bag to the floor and starting to look around, now smoking a fresh cigarette by the looks of it.

The air remained thick with silence for a good minute and you almost felt like you were about to suffocate from the tension.

Oscar was tense beside you, his leg bouncing up and down in an attempt to keep himself calm and so far, he was doing an alright job.

You had expected him to react a lot harsher when the time came that his dad would be returning home and you were proud of him for being able to stay calm, even if you knew he was only doing it for you and Lucía and not for himself.

But then Ray walked over to the kitchen table and tapped the excess ashes of his cigarette into the mug that Oscar had been drinking coffee from only a few minutes ago, and he instantly reacted beside you.

“Can you not smoke in the house?” He spat out at his father, his face pulled into a murderous glare. “It’s not good for the baby.”

“Oscar.” You spoke before you could stop yourself, your face turning to meet his glare with a pointed look. He only stared at you for a second, before turning back to his dad, his glare now even fiercer.

You turned to look at the older man too, forcing yourself to smile. “It’s fine.” You told him and he nodded at you, but Oscar was quick again.

“It’s not fine.” He snapped, and you closed your eyes, breathing out deeply through your nose.

It wasn’t that you were angry with Oscar for being rude. He had every right to be and quite frankly, you hadn’t even expected him to let his father into the house.

But still, you always got anxious when he was in a bad mood, no matter what the cause behind it was, and the stress wasn’t good for the baby so you had to do everything in your power to stay calm, the tension making you so uncomfortable you would have rather melted through the floor than stay there right now.

Luckily, however, Ray stayed polite even with his son’s anger directed toward him and nodded his head, looking directly at you as he put the cigarette out in an ashtray standing on the table. “Sorry.”

You forced another smile through the tension and nodded, silently telling him thank you.

“So when did you get out?” Cesar finally joined the conversation after having sat quiet up until then, obviously nervous judging by the way he was twisting his hands around.

“Yesterday.”

Ray looked around some more as he answered, and Cesar smiled. “How was the trip down?” He asked, but Ray barely even spared him a glance.

“Long.”

The tone in his voice was bored and for a moment, you were overwhelmed by the urge to slap him upside the head and tell him to sound more interested. But of course you didn’t, keeping quiet as you watched him walk around the room.

“Looks the same, even smells the same.” He muttered but stopped himself as he came over a photograph on the wall. It was of you, Oscar, Cesar and Lucía on his first morning home from prison.

You looked like absolute crap, just having woken up at the time, but Oscar had insisted that you hang it up and who were you to say no?

Ray hummed at the sight of the picture, his fingers touching the frame lightly. “Almost the same, at least.” He said, before turning around.

You glanced at Oscar as Ray walked over to where you were sitting, finding his face pulled into an expression of pure and utter hatred as he watched his dad sink down on the stool across from you.

The feeling of unease only intensified inside of you now that the only thing between him and Oscar was a coffee table, feeling hopeless that you couldn’t do anything to ease the tension, and Cesar was feeling equally as awkward about the entire situation.

Ray looked at his youngest son, raising his head in a questioning manner. “You in school?” He asked, and Cesar opened his lips to reply.

Before he got the chance to get as much as a sound out, however, Oscar beat him to it. “Of course he is.”

Their father’s eyes flickered over to him and he nodded. “How about you?” He asked, Spanish accent thick. “Going to college?”

His question drew a scoff from Oscar’s lips. “Seriously?” He questioned.

You could feel him getting angrier for every second passing and out of pure instinct, grabbed a hold of the hand he had resting on your belly, a move that didn’t go unnoticed by Ray.

The man in question quickly looked away from your now intertwined fingers and back to his oldest son, changing the subject. “You’re about to be a father.” He pointed out, and the words instantly caused your lips to tug up into a smile.

“I am a father.” He corrected his own dad, the hidden pride in his voice causing a flurry of butterflies to go through your stomach.

If Ray hadn’t been shocked enough to see you pregnant when he first entered, he was almost at loss for words now. “You have another one?” He asked and Oscar answered without missing a beat.

“Lucía. She’s four.” The corner of his lip twitched upward for the shortest second, but he quickly realized his mistake and hardened his face again as the next question was delivered.

“How long have you been together?” Ray asked.

“Almost seven.” Oscar answered flatly, again without missing a beat.

The silence was really deafening, thick to the point where it was almost painful to be there. More than anything you would have rather just slipped away and gone back to bed where Lucía was still sleeping.

But you didn’t want to be rude and you knew that Oscar preferred to have you by his side when things were uncomfortable for him, so you stayed, no matter how much you didn’t want to.

“It- It’s nice to see you.” Cesar spoke then, breaking the silence again. You smiled at him, adoring him for how he was obviously trying to ease the tension, but Ray only nodded, not answering and not looking away from Oscar, which caused your smile to fall slightly.

Cesar didn’t give up, trying again. “Do you have any plans?”

This time, Ray turned his head to look at him, shaking his head. “No. Just wanted to see you guys before heading up to Bakersfield. Got a job lined up.” He informed him, and before he got the chance to answer, Oscar took the wheel again.

“Cesar, you need to get to school.” He spoke sternly, his eyes not leaving Ray, who had now looked back to him again.

Cesar threw his arms out in exasperation, looking to his older brother and looking ready to protest, but one stern look was more than enough to make him rethink that decision.

Instead, he sighed, turning to look at his dad again. “I’ll see you later.” He said, voice discouraged as he grabbed his bag from the floor beside him and begrudgingly standing up.

You watched as he headed for the door, reaching out to grab the handle, but before he opened the door he stopped himself and turned back around.

“Hey, do you maybe, uh, I don’t know, wanna hang? After school?” He asked unsurely and Ray tore his eyes away from Oscar’s for a moment to look up at him.

“Sure.” He answered.

Cesar’s discouraged attitude was exchanged by a happy one almost instantly and he nodded. “Cool.” He said and without another word to any of you, opened the door and left.

“So where are you staying?” Oscar asked the second his mano was out the door, causing Ray to turn back to him.

“Here.” He answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world and you automatically braced yourself, thinking that Oscar was going to object.

But instead, he only sniffed, pulling a hand over his mouth and chin and standing up, clearing his throat and walking out the front door, leaving you alone with his dad.

You knew he didn’t really want you, Luc��a and his unborn baby around his dad, but you knew that he also knew that you would have to talk to him sooner or later, which you guessed was why he hadn’t forced you to come outside with him.

You hadn’t expected Ray to actually speak to you so when he did, you were surprised.

“He really hates me, huh?” He asked, looking down at his hands where he was fiddling with his fingers.

“No.” The word slipped out before you could help yourself, causing him to look up at you. “He loves you. A bit too much, if you ask me.”

You hadn’t meant for the words to come out as harsh as they did, but in retrospect, he deserved nothing better, something he seemed to know.

“I deserve that.” He agreed with your thoughts, giving you a somber look.

“You do. He’s really hurt and has every right to be. But you know…” You trailed off, swallowing and shrugging your shoulders gently. “It’s not too late. If you stay, he might forgive you someday in the future. It’s going to take a long time and you’ll really have to work for it, but I wouldn’t rule it out.”

He listened to you intently. You could really see how concentrated he was on your words and you appreciated the fact that he was actually partaking in the conversation you were having.

He nodded his head slowly, spacing out for a moment, but then pulled himself back to reality and waved a hand at your stomach.

“How far along are you?” He asked, and automatically, your face instantly lit up in a wide smile.

“I’m due in a month.”

His lips stretched into a smile of his own, although much smaller. “Congrats.” He congratulated and you nodded in thanks as he kept talking. “What about the other one? Lucy? Where is she?”

“Lucía.” You corrected, motioning with a hand down the hall. “She’s still asleep so you’ll meet her later.”

A hesitant expression crossed over his face. “You think Oscar would be okay with that?”

You understood his worries because you knew for a fact that Oscar wouldn’t be happy about it, but you still offered him a comforting smile. “If you’re staying here, I don’t really think he’s got much of a choice. She’s curious so she wouldn’t stay away from you even if we told her to.”

He hummed, nodding his head toward you again, this time looking at the ring at your finger. “You married?”

Without even noticing it, you began twisting the golden ring around your finger. “No. Not yet.” You replied. “We’ve been engaged for five years but it’s not the right time for a wedding, you know, with the Santos and everything going on. But I hope, someday.”

“But the timing was right for a kid?” He asked and his face pulled into one of regret almost instantly. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude.”

But you took no offense to it, simply shaking your head. “It wasn’t planned and we would have rather waited until we had a more secure life going, but…” You paused, smiling gently as you remember how happy Oscar had gotten when you gave him the news. “When I got pregnant there wasn’t much else to do but go through with it because getting an abortion wasn’t an option for neither of us.”

“Do you know what gender it is?” Ray motioned for your stomach once more and again, you shook your head.

“No, Oscar wants it to be a surprise.” You told him.

He nodded, eyes flickering between your stomach and your face. “What are you hoping for?”

You snorted, rubbing your hands over your stomach gently. “I would like a boy for a change but Oscar is hoping for another girl.” You told him, rolling your eyes. “He thinks the risk of him fucking them up, the risk of them walking in his footsteps down the wrong road, is smaller if they’re girls.”

A part of you thought the logic behind his reasoning was nothing but ridiculous, but another part understood the pressure of giving them a better life than he was given.

“I didn’t have a good dad and I ended up the way I did because of him.” Ray told you then. “I never thought I’d be a good dad and I wasn’t, and it’s because of that Oscar ended up the way he did. But it’s not too late for him, to turn things around.”

He was unsure of himself as he spoke and the closer you looked at him, the easier it became to identify the shame behind his eyes. You knew he didn’t deserve your sympathy, but you couldn’t help it.

You tried your hardest to push the feeling of secondhand sorrow to the back of your head, almost feeling like you were betraying Oscar just by feeling it.

“I know.” You agreed with a small smile and he nodded.

“Do you think he knows?”

“He does.” You confirmed, shrugging your shoulders with a sad smile. “He just has to deal with it in his own time.”

Ray hummed, averting his eyes from you and looking around the room. “He’s lucky to have you to guide him. You seem to love him and Cesar a lot.”

“I do. More than anything.” You said and he turned back to look at you with an awkward glance.

“That’s good.” He said. “They both need someone like you in their lives, to keep them away from the bad stuff.”

“Well, Oscar was already mixed up with it when I met him but I’m doing my best to prevent him from getting stuck in it too deep. And as for Cesar, you’d catch me dead before I let him get caught up in any of it.”

You thought back to when Cuchillos had wanted Cesar jumped out of the Santos when he had failed his task to kill Latrell.

Because of a lot of yelling from your side, Oscar had agreed not to push him away, but you weren’t sure he would have done the same if you hadn’t been there.

Either way, going against Cuchillos put a lot of heat on all of you, especially Oscar. They were forced to make up their debt by setting the Prophets up with the money the Santos had robbed from a bank the week before and get them all arrested.

So that was one gang gone from the streets, and it had been pretty quiet since, but now you heard rumors about the kids from 19th Street going around to all of the business on their block, threatening people into paying them rent, which was a new problem in itself.

But you were sure Oscar had it under control. They may have been violent, but they were just kids, most of them no older than fifteen.

If there was anything you had learned from analyzing the other kids in the system while you had still been there, it was that the cause of anger most of the times found its source in them wanting one thing and one thing only; security, which could be used to bargain with them.

It would have been harder if they had been older. Then, they most likely wouldn’t have been after anything in particular, just power, like the Prophets had been.

Getting them off the streets had cleared Oscar and Cesar’s debt with Cuchillos but she was still hanging on his ass, more than she had been before. She was doubting the extents he would go to in order to make sure she was happy, a problem she hadn’t been having before he met you and had a child.

It was constantly unsafe for you and Lucía to go outside and if Oscar got to choose, you wouldn’t have been going outside at all. But you refused to be caged inside like some animal and he knew that both Lucía and you needed the fresh air and human interaction, so he had no other choice but to allow it.

He felt a bit safer with the Santos keeping a watchful eye over you whenever you went anywhere.

You had all heard rumors about the previous generation of Santos turning their back on one of their own some years ago but luckily, this generation of Santos were more loyal to each other than to Cuchillos.

They loved you like you were family and would do anything to keep you safe.

“He’s a good kid. Cesar.” Ray nodded his head, pulling you out of your thoughts and back to the conversation you had almost forgetting you were still in the middle of.

You nodded your head, returning your gaze to him. “He is.” You confirmed. “He’s got a lot of potential. Both of them do, even if Oscar thinks his is long gone.”

His lips twitched every so lightly at your words, his heart unbeknownst to you swelling with pride. But before either of you could say anything else, the sound of a light cry broke through the air.

Both yours and Ray’s heads instantly turned toward the hallway leading to yours and Oscar’s bedroom, and you wasted no time in moving to stand up at the sound of your daughter’s intensifying cries.

She could get extremely confused and disoriented when she woke up alone so you wanted to get to her as quickly as you possibly could.

But getting out of the low couch was easier said than done when you were heavily pregnant. Luckily, twelve years in prison didn’t seem to have stolen all of Ray’s manners, the older man wasting no time in wordlessly standing up and offering you his hands.

You took them gratefully, thanking him softly under your breath and allowing him to pull you to your feet.

“I’ll be right back.” You told him, offering him a last smile before waddling past him and in the direction of your bedroom.

You held on to the wall for support as you walked, reaching your destination in no time despite the slow pace you were forced to walk at. Pushing the door open, Lucía’s cries instantly quietened down as she found your form in the doorway.

She was still lying in the exact same position that you had left her in; turned towards the door with her thumb in her mouth, only now her eyes were wide open and glassy, staring back at you.

“Good morning, baby.” You greeted her as you walked inside, and she wasted no time in shuffling up in the bed.

You walked past her and directly to the windows, pulling the blinds up to let the sunshine into the dark room. Turning back around, you found her shielding her eyes with her arms, sitting on the edge of the low bed, if that’s even what you could call it.

It was just a thick mattress on the floor, without an actual bedframe. Oscar had taken the frame down and gotten rid of it the second he got home from prison, claiming it was too dangerous for Lucía to be sleeping that high up without any kind of fence at the sides.

You didn’t enjoy sleeping so far down to the floor, especially not now when you were pregnant and could barely stand up by yourself, but you hadn’t stopped him, allowing him to be a father for the first time in three years.

Lucía let out a small whimper, rubbing her eyes and getting off the bed, walking over to you. She held her arms out, her blue comfort blanket hanging from one of her hands, and you gave her a sad look.

“You know mommy can’t carry you, baby.” You told her, putting a hand on top of her head. “My stomach is in the way.”

You pulled a hand through her messy, black curls, breathing out in relief when she simply sniffed and lowered her arms again rather than throwing a fit.

It would seem you had caught her on a good day, much to your luck as you knew her meeting with Ray would have been chaotic to say the least if she would have been in a bad mood.

Taking her hand, you wordlessly led her out of the room, taking it slow so that her short legs could keep up with you. When you walked back into the living room, Ray was still standing in the middle of the room, now facing you and appearing to have been waiting for your return.

Once he caught sight of Lucía, a flurry of emotions instantly flickered through his eyes and face, but the second she caught sight of him, she stopped right in her step, cowering behind your leg.

Still holding her hand, you were forced to stop with her, and you looked down at her. “You want to say hello?” You questioned, watching as she shook her head and hid even further behind your legs.

But Ray didn’t seem to take it personally, staying in his spot to not frighten her and smiling softly to himself.

“Shy.” He pointed out, and as that word would be the last one you would use to describe your daughter, you laughed.

“She won’t be when she wakes up properly so I’d brace myself already if I were you.” You warned him, looking down as Lucía stepped out from behind your legs, tugging at your hand and cautious eyes never leaving Ray’s form.

Despite your back and every muscle in your body screaming at you not to, you bent down and picked her up, grateful that she wasn’t very heavy. Once she was secured on your hip, she wrapped her arms around your neck and carefully dared to peak through her curls at Ray, who was now walking closer.

“Es bella.” He complimented his granddaughter, smiling as he pointed a finger at his eyes. “Has Oscar’s eyes. And his curls, too.”

“Yeah, she does.” You chuckled, looking at her. “She didn’t get much from me.”

Ray watched you as you brought a hand up to her face and pulled a curl away from her face, the strand of hair wet with the tears still fresh on her cheeks.

“Is he a good dad?” He asked, causing you to look up at him as he shrugged. “Better than me, I mean.”

“The best. He would do anything for her.” You smiled. “She loves him to pieces, almost never leaves him alone.”

Lucía sucked on her thumb, looking up at you with big eyes. “Quiero a papa.” She mumbled out, her light voice muffled.

At her words, you raised an eyebrow at Ray, who was now smiling in amusement. “You see?” You questioned, before turning your attention back to her. “Let’s go tell daddy you’re awake, yeah?”

She buried her face in the crook of your shoulder in agreement and you turned your attention back to Ray. After him asking you to use the shower and you pointing him in the right direction of the towel cabinet, you bid him goodbye for now and headed outside with Lucía still in your arms.

You spotted Oscar at the driveway immediately, his body bent down and head hidden beneath the hood of his car, hands working away on something inside.

A smile grazed your lips at the sweet sight of his tan arms under the sunlight and Lucía looked up the second the familiar sound of a wrench being twisted reached her ears.

“Papá!” She squealed out, instantly drawing the attention of Oscar. His lips turned up and he dropped the wrench, wiping his hands off on a red rag before kneeling down and opening his arms.

Lucía immediately started twisting her body in your arms, wanting to be put down, and you gladly granted her wish and put her down on her feet, having to stop on the porch for a moment to stretch your aching back.

While you did so, you watched with a smile as Lucía ran into Oscar’s arms, who in turn wasted no time in picking her up against his chest. “¿Dormiste bien?” He asked her, and you waddled your way down the steps of the porch to approach them.

Lucía nodded to answer his question, not very talkative when she had just woken up, and Oscar brought his hand up to the back of her head, pressing a kiss to her forehead and mumbling fondly against her skin. “Mi princesita.”

His eyes drifted over to you when he saw you approaching then, your hand covering your face from the bright sun.

“Did you talk to him?” He nodded at you, wasting no time in cutting to the chase.

You hummed in response, standing up on your tippy-toes in order to press a kiss to his cheek. “Yeah.” You answered honestly, feeling his eyes on the side of your face as you switched your attention to Lucía where she was resting her head against Oscar’s shoulder.

“What did he say?” Oscar asked, and you answered simply.

“Stuff.”

“What kind of stuff?” He questioned again and this time you turned to look at him.

“Just stuff.” You smiled, bringing your hand up to his cheek. “Don’t worry about it.” You pulled him down to be able to press your lips to his in a sweet kiss, but the second you pulled apart again, he went right back to interrogating you.

“Did Luci talk to him?” He asked, his face now turned into a glare.

You shook your head, dropping your hand from his face with a sigh when you realized you wouldn’t be able to cure his foul mood right then, not that you blamed him for being angry in the first place. “No. She’s still drowsy from waking up so she was a bit shy. She didn’t cry though so that’s a good sign.”

He hummed, turning his attention to Lucía. When he looked at her, she brought her head up from his chest and stared right back, her nose scrunching up when he brought his hand up to her face to move a strand of hair that had stuck to her cheek, just like you had done minutes before.

After making sure her face was free from hair, he turned back to you, looking you up and down and nodding his head slightly when he reached your feet. “Your shoelace is up.”

You looked down at his words, finding that the shoelace of your left Nike shoe was, in fact, undone. But before you could even think about trying to tie it yourself, not that you would have been able to, he had put Lucía down on her feet and gone down on one knee, lifting your foot up to his thigh.

“I got it.” He told you simply, tying your laces up in no time. When he dropped your foot back down and stood up, an uncomfortable pain suddenly went through your stomach, forcing a gasp out of your lips.

Oscar was alerted immediately, watching as your hands automatically went to your stomach. “What’s wrong?” He asked, his entire attitude turning serious and his hands coming to rest on top of yours,

“Nothing.” You quickly answered, smiling as you got used to the uncomfortable feeling. “He’s just kicking. Here, give me your hand.”

Without waiting for a reply, you moved your hands from underneath his and grabbed his wrist, moving it to the place where your baby was kicking the hardest.

“She’s kicking.” He corrected you with a small glare while you moved his hand around, causing you to roll your eyes and drop his wrist.

“You always have to ruin the moment, don’t you?”

“No, espera.” He said as you began moving away from his touch, moving right after you in order to keep his hands on your stomach.

You smirked at him, shaking your head. “Too late now, papi. She stopped kicking.” You turned to Lucía, holding your hand out. “Come on, mija. Let’s go.”

Oscar watched as she took your outstretched hand and stood at your side, narrowing his eyes slightly. “Where are you going?” He questioned, and even though there would never be a day when you weren’t thankful for his protection, you rolled your eyes at the defensive tone in his voice.

“We’re taking a walk to the store.” You told him. “The fridge is nearly empty and we need to stock up on food now that we’ve got another mouth to feed.”

“He can pay for his own damn food.” Oscar quickly spat, eyes turning hard. “You’re not his sirvienta.”

“Oscar.” You warned with a glare of your own. “Don’t lose your temper in front of her.” You instinctively pushed your daughter further behind your leg to shield her from Oscar’s murderous face.

He turned his head to the side the second your words reached his ears, taking a deep breath through his nose and calming himself down before turning back around. His face was still cold and guarded, but not nearly as furious as it had been a few seconds ago.

“Be careful.” He ordered you softly, one of his hands finding its way to the top of Lucía’s head while the other rested on your belly. He leaned his head down and pressed a kiss to your forehead. “I love you, amores míos.”

“We love you, too.” You smiled, squeezing his hand with yours.

He pulled away from you after another two quick kisses and turned to Lucía, raising a playful eyebrow at her. “Sé bueno para tu madre, ¿de acuerdo?” He held his pinky finger out and she hooked her much smaller one with his, taking her thumb out of her mouth.

“Prometo.” She answered with a toothy grin.

“Good girl.” He ruffled her hair, chuckling in amusement as her face pulled into a glare, her small hands trying to swat his hand away.

Turning back to you, he gave you a chaste kiss to the lips. “I’ll see you soon.” He said, giving your stomach one last caress before turning back to the car, allowing you and Lucía to walk away and head for the store.

Being pregnant was always one huge dilemma. Your ankles were constantly swollen and your back felt like it was about to snap in two pretty much all of the time. But in order for your ankles not to get even more swollen and for your back not to get even more stiff, you had to walk around pretty much all day, which was never free of pain.

Luckily, you lived pretty close to the store you usually shopped at and the store in question was still on Santos territory which you knew was the only reason that Oscar let you and Lucía walk there alone.

His boys all lived spread out through the same neighborhood as you did and when they weren’t out patrolling or participating in illegal activities, they were always sitting out on their lawns or porches, watching over the street and by doing so, also watching over you.

The walk that would have taken no longer than five minutes for anyone else took about fifteen for you.

Not only could you not walk very quickly with the extra weight you were carrying around and with Lucía’s short legs, but now that she had fully woken up, her usual overly social personality had come back to the surface, pretty much forcing her to stop and greet every neighbor who happened to be outside. And let’s not even talk about the many times she spotted an animal.

It was safe to say that it took a while for you to reach your destination and you were sure that if Oscar hadn’t known how his daughter functioned when she was out in the world, he would have come after you, worried out of his mind, a long time ago.

But he was very well aware of how she functioned. After all, he had gotten used to it before she was even born, her absentmindedness and tendency to get easily distracted being pretty much the only thing she had inherited from you.

Everything else about her; her looks, her temper, the energy that never seemed to run out and her charm, came from him. It was truly like looking at a mini Spooky.

Nearly an entire hour had passed before you were turning back onto your street, Lucía’s hand clasped in yours and your other hand holding two plastic bags full of groceries.

Rather than her thumb being in her mouth, she was now happily sucking away on a blue lollipop, her mouth sticky with a mixture of the sugary goodness and ketchup from the hot dog you had bought her for a late breakfast on your way home.

You had tried to wipe it away but she had pretty much refused to let you touch her, too eager to chase after a squirrel, so you let it go, deciding you would just give her a shower when returning home instead.

It was an as good time as ever as she was still dressed in yesterday’s clothes, having fallen asleep in them the night before and both you and Oscar having been too tired to even notice it.

While eating her lollipop, Lucía was looking around the street with a wide smile on her face, waving to every person she laid eyes on, while you were keeping your gaze forward.

You could see Oscar still working on the car in the driveway of your house in the distance, but now Ray was standing beside him, motioning to the car while Oscar kept his focus on the engine.

As you got closer, you could hear Ray laughing as he said something.

You could make out the exact words but whatever he said made Oscar snap because the next thing you knew, he slammed the hood shut and got up in Ray’s face, who was now looking down into the ground.

When seeing the all but peaceful behavior, you pulled at the back of Lucía´s shirt gently, urging her to stop.

“Hold on, baby. Let’s wait this out, yeah?” You smiled down at her, and although she hadn’t noticed her dad and Ray fighting yet and had no idea what you were talking about, she happily nodded and sat down on the sidewalk, patting the asphalt beside her in a way that made your heart melt in your chest.

She was so used to you having to take small breaks every so often by now that she never even questioned it anymore.

You couldn’t deny it felt nice for your feet to sit down for a moment, but your heart was still heavy in your chest as you listened to the conversation taking place in the distance while Lucía cluelessly played with your bracelets beside you, caught up in her own world.

“Let’s get something straight. You can come back here and pretend to be a father. But I know what’s up.” You listened intently as Oscar spoke to his dad, watching out of the corner of your eye as he raised a hand to motion to the house. “Cesar. He’s been through a lot of shit lately. So I’ll let him live under this delusion. For now. And let’s not even talk about my girls. If it were up to me you wouldn’t even be allowed to be in the same room as them, but (Y/N) wants to give you a chance because you’re their Abuelo, so you better not fuck this up.”

Oscar glared at Ray and took a step back, wiping his hands on the red rag as he walked around the car toward the fence.

“Does Cesar hate me?”

Oscar stopped at the sound of his dad’s question, looking back at him and scoffing. “He’s never even talked about you.” He answered with pure hatred, before turning back around and disappearing behind the red fence to the backyard.

Only then did you and Lucía stand up and keep walking, not wanting her to witness any conflict. Ray turned around at the sound of your footsteps, his eyes catching sight of you, and when his gaze flickered down to Lucía by your side, he hurried to drop the cigarette he was smoking and waved the smoke away with his hands.

No matter how bad he had treated Oscar and Cesar in the past, you could admit that it was decent of him to care for Oscar’s wishes about not smoking around her and actually seem to care about her wellbeing.

He started walking toward you to meet you halfway and wasted no time in reaching for the bags of groceries in your hand. ”Let me help you.”

“Thank you.” You thanked him, using your now free hand to support your belly as you walked up in front of the house.

Once entering, Lucía ran past the two of you toward the kitchen island where she climbed up on the barstool she had claimed as her own a long time ago, watching you as you followed.

Ray put the bag down on the island in front of her and her eyes were instantly on him.

“What’s your name?” Her small voice came before either of you could even think about saying anything else, followed by the sound of the hard lollipop hitting against her teeth.

A shocked expression took over Ray’s face for a moment, not having expected her to talk to him so soon. But you had warned him.

“Ray.” He answered after taking a moment to collect himself, watching the small girl with a fond expression.

Lucía stared right back at him with curious eyes, squinting them and tilting her head to the side slightly, just like Oscar would do.

You put a hand on top of her head as you passed her, smiling. “Él es tu Abuelo.” You told her and she instantly held her pinky out.

“Mucho gusto.”

Ray raised his eyebrows, glancing at you as if asking you what to do. You held up your own pinky behind her at that, silently showing him to hook his with hers, and he did just that, turning his attention back to her.

“Nice to meet you, too.” He said politely, watching as she then turned her attention to a magazine that was laying on the countertop. In turn, he moved his attention to you, pointing out. “You’re teaching her Spanish.”

You nodded, beginning to busy yourself with unpacking one of the bags. “Yeah. Or, well, Oscar is.” You chuckled. “Almost seven years together and I still don’t know much. I can understand it, though.”

“Better than nothing.” Ray praised you awkwardly and moved to unpack the second bag, to which you offered him a grateful smile.

“Do you like ice cream?” Lucía then spoke again, causing you both to turn back to her while continuing to unload the groceries onto the counter.

“I love ice cream.” Ray answered, causing her to smile.

“Me too.” She said happily, her body moving where she sat as she kicked her legs under the counter.

Ray nodded while you went around his back to start putting things into the fridge. “What’s your favourite flavor?” He asked, passing you objects over his shoulder in a fluid pace without breaking eye-contact with the smaller girl.

Her smile widened at the question and she took the lollipop out of her mouth in order to flash him a charming grin. “Chocolate chip cookie!” She exclaimed proudly and as you rounded Ray to keep taking things out of the bag, you noticed his eyebrows shooting up.

“Mine too.” He admitted and Lucía gasped.

“Twins!”

You bit the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from laughing out loud. Her bubbly personality in comparison to his pretty much opposite one was so comical to you for some reason. But Ray didn’t hold it in, chuckling at her as he continued to help you with the groceries.

Before any of you could spark up another conversation, the sound of the front door opening reached your ears. Expecting to see Oscar, you were surprised to instead see the younger Diaz brother walking inside, bag slung over his shoulder.

Your eyes instantly shot up, but he only greeted you with a smile, grinning even wider when his eyes caught sight of Ray standing beside you.

“What are you doing home already?” You wasted no time in asking, crunching the now empty bag together into a ball with your hands.

Cesar dropped his bag on the counter once he reached you and leaned in to kiss your cheek like he always did when greeting you.

“Our teacher got sick last minute and they couldn’t find a sub.” He informed you and you hummed, watching as he turned to Lucía.

“Hug, tío.” She held her arms out and he bent down to give her a hug without protest, attacking her cheek with kisses.

She giggled, holding on to him tighter, and you instantly moved in to pull them apart when seeing her lollipop dangerously close to his hair. “Watch your uncle’s hair, Lucía.” You told her as you carefully moved her hand away.

Cesar pulled a hand over the back of his head to check for any stickiness as he stood back up to his full height but didn’t seem very bothered as he locked his pinky with hers, grinning widely at her before turning to Ray.

He suddenly turned shy, shifting on his feet. “Are you free right now? I was thinking we could go over to Dwayne’s Joint and grab some lunch. My friend’s dad is the owner and I work there sometimes so I eat for free. The food there is amazing.”

Ray glanced at you, almost as if to ask permission, and when you gave him an encouraging nod and smile, he turned to his youngest and smiled awkwardly. “Sure, I could eat.” He agreed and Cesar instantly lit up.

“Great. Let’s go.”

“Have fun.” You told them as Ray began rounding you.

Cesar reached over and gave you a quick side-hug, followed by an even quicker kiss to the cheek, obviously excited beyond words to finally get to spend some time with his dad. “I’ll be home to help with dinner later.” He promised.

You only smiled, accepting the brief affection with a smile on your face. “Don’t worry about it, it’s still early. You’ve got time.”

The teenage boy flashed you a final grin, showing off his pearly whites, before the two of them bid you and Lucía goodbye and left, leaving you and your daughter alone.

Looking to her, you noticed she had now finished the lollipop, the stick laying on the magazine beside her, and that she was now looking up at you with big, questioning eyes.

“Can I go draw?” She asked, and you smiled, nodding.

“Of course.” You replied, picking the lollipop stick up from the magazine and heading over to the trash bin. You could hear her getting down from the chair behind you and you turned around, pointing a finger at her. “But go wash your mouth first.”

She only looked at you, giggling before running away. You stood still, listening intently until you heard the tap turn on in the bathroom, only then moving again.

“You best friends with my dad now?”

You jumped at the sound of the sudden voice speaking up from behind you, one hand going for your heart and the other going directly to your stomach. Turning around, you found Oscar now leaning against the edge of the kitchen island. You hadn’t even heard him come inside.

“Shit, Oscar.” You swore, leaning back against the sink as you attempted to calm your beating heart, glaring at him. “You know you can’t scare me like that.”

He nodded slowly, uncrossing his arms from over his chest and pushing himself off the island, approaching you. “Sorry.” He apologized lowly, placing a hand on your stomach. “¿Estás bien?”

You released a breath through your nose, looking up at him. “Yeah, but you near gave me a heart attack.” You told him, eyes pointed. “You know the doctor said scaring me isn’t good for the baby.”

Taking you into his arms, he nuzzled his face into your neck, pressing his lips against the skin in the crook where your neck met your shoulders. “I didn’t mean to.” He mumbled, voice coming out muffled as he placed another kiss on the spot.

“I know you didn’t.” You hummed, wrapping your arms around his neck and dragging your fingers over the back of his head. “It’s fine.”

He pressed a third kiss to your skin before bringing his head back up, looking at you with absolutely no emotion on his face. “I don’t want you being around him. I don’t want Lucía around him.” He stated flatly, and you knew exactly who he was talking about.

“He’s her grandfather.” You defended, your voice becoming hushed so that she wouldn’t hear you talking and a glare settling over your face.

He met your glare with one of his own. “I don’t want her to get attached.” He did nothing to hide the loathing behind his words, but despite being angry he kept rubbing soothing circles on your waist and stomach.

“You’re not the only one who gets to make decisions regarding our daughter. I’m her parent, too.” You pointed out. “I’m not his biggest fan either and you know it, but I’m not going to alienate her from him like he’s got the plague. We’re all going to be living under the same room and for her sake we have to make the best of the situation.”

Oscar’s eyes closed with annoyance and he breathed out harshly through his nose, his hands stilling their previous movements at your sides. He leaned his forehead against yours and pressed a long, hard kiss to your lips, before turning around without another word and heading for the bathroom.

He clearly didn’t agree with anything you had just said but he still knew your relationship was more important than being petty and never left you on a bad note, which was one of the many, many reasons that you loved him as much as you did.

You were left alone in the kitchen when he disappeared, but not even a minute later you could hear his voice yell out through the entire house.

“SHIT!”

Your pregnancy hormones had completely control over your body and worry instantly filled your body, causing you to imagine the worst and forcing your feet to carry you across the room toward the bathroom as quickly as they could.

“What’s wrong? What happened?” You yelled out as you waddled through the hallway, appearing in the bathroom doorway only a few seconds later.

You instantly allowed yourself to let go of the breath you hadn’t known that you were holding when seeing that Oscar wasn’t hurt, laughter quickly bubbling up in your throat and escaping your lips in soft chuckles.

Oscar turned to look at you with a glare. “You think this shit is funny?” He asked, hurrying to turn off the tap that was running on full capacity.

Bringing a hand to your mouth in a failed attempt to hide your laughter, you shook your head, taking in the way his feet were now soaked in the water that had collected on the floor.

In the sink laid a white towel, having prevented the water from going down the drain and given the water no other choice but to spill over the edges.

You struggled to hold back the snickers at the sight of him walking around in the water, his socks hanging off at his toes with the added weight.

With the laughter still caught in your throat, you turned your head out to the hallway, yelling out. “Lucía! What have we told you about leaving the towel in the sink?”

“And turning off the fucking tap!” Oscar joined in, his voice shaking the walls.

You stepped over the threshold and walked into the bathroom, happy you weren’t wearing socks and slapped his chest while giving him a pointed glare. “Don’t curse at her.” You scolded, and he simply met your glare with one of his own as Lucía’s voice came from down the hall.

“Sorry!”

The sound of her voice instantly made Oscar’s glare fall, but he still pulled an annoyed and tired hand over his face, reaching out to grab a dry towel from a shelf.

“I’ll help you.” You wasted no time in trying to round him to get to the shelf, but he caught you by your upper arms, stopping you and letting out a sigh.

“No, I got it.” He insisted. “It’s not even noon and you’ve already moved around more than you did all day yesterday. You shouldn’t put too much pressure on yourself, mami.”

He was in a bad mood and had every right to considering the circumstances. Not only had his dad just returned, pretending as if he hadn’t been gone for twelve entire years but now he had to clean up after his irresponsible daughter, too.

You raised your hand to his face, pressing it against the line of his jaw and turning his head toward yours. Without saying anything, you pressed your lips to his, feeling him let out another breath through his nose, his body slowly but surely relaxing under your touch.

Breaking apart, you kept your hand on his cheek, searching his eyes.

“I love you.” You told him sincerely, watching as his eyes closed and feeling his hands come to rest on your waist, the situation at hand and the mess around you momentarily forgotten as you held each other.

“I love you too, mamas.” He replied, leaning down to steal another kiss before pulling apart with a sigh, looking around at the mess he would be left with.

You caressed the corner of his lip as he looked around, bringing your other hand up to touch the cross hanging around his neck. “Can you give Lucía a bath once you’re done?” You asked and he nodded.

“Yeah.” He turned to look at you again. “Did she eat?”

You hummed in response to his question, confirming it. “She ate a hot dog on the way home from the store, hence the need for a shower.” You chuckled, looking around. “I doubt she actually got any of the ketchup off her face. Mostly looks like she made a mess in here.”

“A mess?” He raised an unimpressed eyebrow, letting go of your waist and taking a step back, the water splashing around his feet. “We have an indoor pool.”

“Yeaaah…” You drawled, laughter once again bubbling up in your throat. Your eyes flickered to the floor for a second before going back up to meet Oscar’s, your hand laying a light slap to his cheek. “Have fun cleaning this up, baby.”

You leaned in and placed a last kiss to his lips before turning around and heading back out toward the doorway, making sure to wipe your feet off on the threshold sill before stepping over it into the dry hallway.

“Puta…” You could hear Oscar muttering under his breath as you walked away and you grinned, yelling back over your shoulder.

“I heard that!”

“Good.” His voice came again, this time a lot closer to you, and before you had time to register what was happening, a sharp slap was delivered to your ass.

You squealed, almost jumping out of your own skin in surprise. “Oscar!” You scolded him, turning around to see him standing in the doorway with the towel twisted in his hand. How he had gotten there so fast without you hearing him stepping over the water you didn’t know, but you couldn’t keep the smile off your face.

He leaned his head out into the hallway and stole another kiss, giving you a smug smirk. “Go lay down, mami. I’ll deal with this shit.” He told you before closing himself into the bathroom, and you didn’t have to be told twice.

You shook your head, chuckling to yourself and rubbing your stinging butt while waddling back into the living room and heading directly for the couch.

Laying down, you let out a breath of relief as your back was stretched out and the pain slowly but surely started disappearing.

You grabbed a pillow and placed it over your face to block out the sunlight for the sake of your growing headache and just laid there, listening to your surroundings.

Outside the window right above you, you could hear doors of houses and cars opening and slamming shut. You could hear voices of kids yelling somewhere down the street and the wind that had been blowing through the window earlier that morning was still going strong judging by the sound of ruffling leaves.

A few minutes later of just lying there in silence, you could hear Oscar walking out of the bathroom and into Lucía’s room, talking to her in Spanish.

Another minute or two later, the sound of the bath filling and the bathroom door closing cut through the otherwise silent house and with a sigh, you decided that you were done resting.

No matter how nice it felt in your back to lay down, you hated doing nothing and didn’t want to waste any more time just lying around when there were plenty of things to be done around the house that you knew no one else would deal with.

So you stood up and wordlessly started moving around again, going around the house on a hunt for dirty dishes and bringing them with you to the kitchen where you dumped them in the sink for later.

You then began picking clothes and garbage off the floor, throwing the clothes in a hamper and the trash in a bag.

Going through the hallway with the hamper in one hand and the trash bag in the other, you checked through every room and cleaned up where it was needed.

Cesar’s room was the one at the end of the hallway and you braced yourself, also knowing that it was always the messiest.

You weren’t one to complain about what state in which he left his room; he had his space and you had yours, and as long as the door remained closed to that you didn’t have to look at his mess, you didn’t care.

But on the rare occasion, like now, where you had nothing better to do, you would head in and clean it as well as you possibly could without violating his privacy and going through his private things.

You had learned the hard way that he got extremely defensive about his things and his privacy so after that first time, you hadn’t made the mistake of snooping again, even though it had been by accident that you had found an open condom wrapper on his desk.

That was the first and only time he had ever yelled at you, something Oscar had given him shit for later, but you didn’t really take offense to it; you were only glad that you hadn’t found the condom.

While picking up dirty clothes and candy wrappers from Cesar’s floor, putting them in their respective bags, you looked around, taking in your surroundings.

The walls that had been white up until a few months ago were now spray-painted in blue and pink graffiti and on the wall right next to the doorway, a pinboard hung, holding drawings and a few pictures of Cesar with you, Oscar, Lucía and his friends, the one of him with Lucía being one of your favourite pictures.

Cesar’s arms were wrapped around her from behind, both of them smiling so widely it almost made your cheeks hurt by looking at. Lucía was holding an ice cream cone, her entire face covered in the treat, and she was wearing a yellow hat that had slid down over her eyes, hiding them from the camera.

You had taken it on one of the many days you had spent with them on the beach. It would have been perfect if Oscar had been there, but he had still been locked up at the time.

You smiled as you thought back to that day, remembering their laughter and how they had chased each other at the seashore, Lucía having been absolutely ecstatic when feeling the water at her feet.

With one last look at the photograph, you evened it out so that it wasn’t crooked before continuing to clean up on the floor.

Once all of the trash was in the bag and all of the dirty clothes were in the hamper, you folded the clothes you knew were clean and put them into his drawer, then moving on to make his bed and tidy his desk up a bit.

The carpet needed to be vacuumed and the surfaces in his room were in a pretty desperate need of a dusting and scrub, but you decided to put a pin in it, knowing it wouldn’t be very long until he got back home and probably wouldn’t want you in his room when he did.

Closing the door behind you when you left, you headed for the closed bathroom door and put the trash bag on the floor to be able to open the door, still holding on to the now full hamper at your side.

As the door slid open, you were immediately graced by the sight of Oscar’s naked back where he was crouched down by the side of the bathtub, his arms holding his body upright on the edge.

The tiles on the floor were now dry and the washing machine was spinning like crazy, Oscar appearing to have started a load with the towels he had used to clean up Lucía’s mess, which instantly made a smile rise to your lips.

You approached him from the back, Lucía becoming visible over his shoulder as you got closer. She was playing with a blue rubber duck, making quacking noises and repeatedly moving the duck toward Oscar in an attempt to make him join in on the quacking.

He obviously didn’t and it was appearing to make her grow agitated, her quacking becoming more aggressive by every second passing.

You chuckled to yourself and decided to have some fun as Oscar had yet to notice your presence, the sound of your entrance being swallowed by the loud noise coming from the shaking washing machine.

You closed in on him sneakily, putting the hamper down to the side before slowly leaning down to his head.

You stayed there for a moment, just looking from over his shoulder as he rippled his hand through the water to create waves for Lucía’s duck, before blowing on his ear and whispering a quiet; “Quack.”

“Mierda!” He jumped to his feet instantly and you had to hurry to back away in order to not be smacked right across the face, laughter instantly spilling out from your lips.

Lucía, now having spotted you, wasted no time in joining in on the laughter even though she most likely didn’t even know what was so funny, while Oscar glared at you.

“¿Qué te pasa?” He asked, furious. “I could have hit you.” He motioned for your stomach, but you only laughed, not being able to take the situation seriously.

“For someone who’s been on the run from the law for most of his life, you’re not very attentive.” You pointed out and he pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath before taking one step forward and tugging you by your arm into his chest.

You rested your head on his chest, wrapping your arms around his torso. Above you, his eyes spotted the hamper filled to the top with dirty laundry.

At the sight of it, he moved his head away from on top of yours and raised an eyebrow at you. “I thought I told you to rest.” He said and you sheepishly smiled. “You never listen, do you?”

“Mommy never listens.” Lucía joined in from the bathtub, causing the two of you to turn around and look at her.

Oscar threw his head back as he laughed while you only narrowed your eyes at your daughter. “Are you ganging up on me now?” You questioned, and in response, she narrowed her eyes to imitate you, only causing Oscar to grow even smugger.

He reached his hand out toward her, pinky out, and Lucía moved to the edge of the tub, hooking her pinky with his.

You tutted at the sight playfully. “Like father, like daughter.” You teased, and walked back out of the bathroom, leaving them alone to their quality bath time again.

You grabbed the bag with trash from the floor outside and closed the door to the bathroom, heading over to the kitchen where you dumped the bag of trash in the bin before moving on to clean off the coffee table and make up the sofa with pillows and blankets for Ray to sleep with.

Just as you got done, Lucía and Oscar emerged from the bathroom, a cloud of steam flowing out behind them after the shower Oscar appeared to have taken by the look of his fresh clothes.

He was now wearing a black and grey checkered plaid and a pair of grey sweats that weren’t soaked in water at the ends and Lucía was dressed in her Winnie The Pooh bathrobe, the hood with ears on top pulled over her wet curls.

She wasted no time in getting up on a chair at the kitchen table, short legs starting to kick as soon as she had sat down.

While she got situated over there, Oscar walked over to the fridge by the couch where he kept the alcohol, bending down and opening the door. Before he got the chance to grab what he came for, however, Lucía called out from her spot.

“Bring me my crayons.”

It wasn’t particularly directed at him, but Oscar still closed the fridge again and stood back up to his full height, not saying a word as he left to her room to bid to her command.

While he did so, you grabbed the bottle-opener from the kitchen island and waddled over to the fridge, grabbing a cold bottle of Corona just as Oscar returned with Lucía’s crayons and coloring books.

When hearing him return, she stood up on her chair and Oscar put the things down in front of her before taking her in his arms and sitting down on the chair with her in his lap.

She wasted no time in digging into her crayons and you walked over to them, opening the bottle of beer on the way there.

At the sound of the cap releasing from the throat of the bottle, Oscar looked up, and reached out and grabbed it from your hands the second you got close enough, raising it to his lips and taking a sip immediately.

Once he brought it back down from his lips, you bent down and wrapped your arms around his shoulders from behind, pressing your lips to the tattoo on his neck.

“Gracias.” He thanked you for the beer, turning his head to the side to capture your lips with his in a kiss.

You weren’t sure when the time went from noon to afternoon, but soon enough, the sun was setting outside and Ray and Cesar were walking through the front door, talking loudly and laughing between themselves.

Oscar was still sitting with Lucía at the table, sipping on his beer slowly and watching over her as she colored in her books.

You had started on the cooking only a few minutes ago, standing over by the kitchen island chopping onions for the guacamole you were making, and you could almost feel the entire atmosphere turning hostile when ray stepped in through the door, Oscar’s anger radiating off of him and reaching you all the way where you stood in the kitchen.

But he ignored him, keeping his eyes on Lucía’s drawing and taking a large gulp of his beer while Cesar walked over to them and pinched Lucía’s cheek, causing her to let out a gleeful laugh.

The sound brought a smile to everyone’s lips, even Oscar’s, who raised his head to greet his brother with a fist-bump.

Cesar then walked right past you where you stood and headed for his room, while Ray cautiously sat down across from Oscar and Lucía at the table.

“Pink, please.” Lucía spoke without looking up from her drawing, and Oscar did what he had been doing for the past hour and a half and handed her the crayon of her wishes, taking another gulp of his beer and completely ignoring Ray’s gaze.

She dragged the pink crayon over her drawing a few times before holding it up. “Blue, please.” She repeated herself, this time asking for another color, and Oscar wordlessly took the pink crayon and exchanged it for a blue, watching as she colored away in her book.

You tried to give father and son some privacy by busying yourself with chopping the onions, but since you were so close to them, you couldn’t miss the way Ray was desperately trying to search out his oldest son’s eye, and failing miserably.

“You’re good with her.” He finally spoke up, nodding his head and motioning with his hand carefully.

“Mm.” Oscar’s eyes didn’t leave the drawing, his lips pulled into a tight line as he simply hummed in response.

“Are you hoping for the baby to be a boy or a girl?” Ray tried again, and you watched out of the corner of your eye as Oscar brought the bottle of beer to his lips and down the rest of its content before slamming it down on the table, raising his hand at you over his shoulder, almost as if he knew that you were watching them.

“Girl.” He answered while you wiped your hands on the kitchen towel and rounded the kitchen island, heading for the fridge where you grabbed two beers this time.

You brought them over to the table they were sitting at and grabbed the opener where you had left it when bringing Oscar his first bottle, opening the two bottles and taking the sharp caps into your hand so that Lucía wouldn’t get to them.

“Why not a boy?” Ray questioned, glancing up at you briefly as you handed him one of the beers, nodding his head. “Thank you.”

You offered him a gentle smile before turning to Oscar, taking the empty bottle from beside him and handing him the new one.

He didn’t look up at you, but when you put a hand on his shoulder in passing, he put his hand on top of yours, squeezing it in thanks before you walked back to the kitchen.

Ray knew the answer to his question, of course, already having gotten it from you earlier that day. He just wanted to hear what he would answer himself, but he should have expected Oscar not to be willing to give much away.

“Less problems.” He answered flatly and this time, Ray didn’t question him any further, only nodding and leaning back in his seat, joining him in drinking while watching Lucía draw.

The house turned silent again, but Cesar chose the right time to come back right then, returning with a plastic bag in his hand.

You hadn’t seen it when he had first arrived, so you guessed he had carried it in his bag that he had now left in his room.

He held the bag up with a smile on his face, looking around at all of you. “We went by the store and got some ice cream on the way home.” He told you, and Lucía instantly perked up, turning in Oscar’s lap to look at Cesar.

Oscar turned too, narrowing his eyes. “Where’d you get money from?” He asked, and Cesar only shrugged.

“Dad paid.” He replied simply, walking over to the freezer where he brought the tub of ice cream out of the bag and put it inside.

You watched from your spot as Ray smiled at Lucía. “Chocolate chip cookie.” He told her, and she instantly squealed in excitement, turning to Oscar.

‘’Chocolate chip cookie!” She repeated happily, and he hummed.

“I heard.”

You glared at him from where you stood on the other side of the room and almost as if feeling your glare burning into the side of his head, he turned to glare right back at you.

You gave him a pointed look, silently scolding him for not being excited for your daughter’s sake, and when he turned his head back around, bringing his beer up to his lips again, you looked at Lucía who had now gone back to drawing.

“What do we say, Lucí?” You asked, and she looked up from her drawing to beam at Ray.

“Gracias!” She exclaimed, and Ray smiled, although it didn’t go unnoticed by you the way his eyes kept flickering to Oscar’s, his smile faltering ever so lightly when they did.

The subject was dropped after that. Oscar didn’t say another word but Lucía was as happy as ever that her Abuelo brought ice cream home for her.

While the two oldest Diaz men watched her draw, Cesar joined you in the kitchen, finally greeting you after having passed by you earlier.

He murmured a quick ‘hey’, leaning down to kiss your cheek in greeting before standing beside you, watching you chop the last of the onion.

“Did you clean my room?” He asked and you glanced at him with a soft smile, nodding your head.

“Yeah.” You answered, turning your attention back to the sharp knife in your hand. “But I didn’t snoop, I promise.”

He chuckled beside you. “It’s alright. Thank you.” He let out a breath and you glanced at him again to see his smile widening, his hands now moving to roll up his sleeves. “Can I help?”

You smiled, nodding your head. “Sure. You can start dicing the tomatoes. I’m just finishing up with the onions so I’m going to start on the avocados.”

He nodded his head and wasted no time in reaching for another knife, starting on the tomatoes beside you while you, as you had told him you would, put the onions in a bowl and started on the avocados.

You chatted between yourselves and after a few minutes, Ray joined you in the kitchen with a sullen look on his face, probably having come to terms with the fact that he wasn’t welcome where he had just come from.

An hour later, you were all sitting around the table, the coloring books and crayons now put aside and the table full of food.

The only sound that could be heard was silverware scraping over the plates and the occasional silly remark from Lucía about the food. The tension hanging in the air was so thick it could have been cut with a butter knife and made it near impossible for you to enjoy your dinner no matter how good the food was.

Oscar was the tensest out of all of you, not having looked up from his plate since you served it to him.

You were holding his hand under the table, rubbing your thumb soothingly over his knuckles that seemed to be constantly bruised, doing your best to at least take some of his anger away.

But it wasn’t doing much and Cesar seemed to have noticed as well, the two of you exchanging an uncomfortable glance before he plastered on a smile and finally broke the awkward silence.

“So… dad got a job at Dwayne’s Joint today.”

“Really? That’s great news!” You hurried to join in on Cesar’s brave attempt, maybe being a little too quick judging by the way Oscar’s head whipped up to glare at you.

He slammed his fist into the table angrily, turning to glare at his younger brother. “You got him a job?” He spat, the hurt and betrayal evident in his voice as he shook his head. “Big mistake.”

Ray cleared his throat from where he sat, putting his fork down and resting his clutched hands on the table.

“You’ve got a good thing going here, Oscar. You’ve got a kind mujer and a good kid, and another on the way.” He spoke, and you smiled. “I’m not here to mess that up for you. I’m done stirring shit up in your life. I’ll move out as soon as I have enough money, I just need some more time.”

“Pendejada.” Oscar quickly swore, turning his glare to his dad. “Do you really think you’re fooling me? You’re not planning to stay. You never do. You’re gonna leave and you’re gonna crush Cesar and Lucía just like you crushed me.”

Your heart broke at his words and the feeling of his hand getting clammy in yours, and you hurt even more when seeing the tears beginning to well up in his eyes.

He stood up from his chair, pulling his hand out of yours in the process and you attempted to reach for it again. “Oscar-“

“Cállate!” He yelled, whipping around to glare at you. The unexpected volume of his voice caused you all to jump and Lucía instantly started crying out of the scare.

Oscar’s face fell the second her cries reached his ears, guilt visibly filling his body. But you just glared, stood up from your seat and picked her up, holding the back of her head as she buried her face into your neck, carrying her out of the kitchen without another word.

You could feel Oscar’s presence not far behind you and you knew he was following you. Once you reached your bedroom door, you opened it up and put Lucía down on her feet, giving her a light push toward the bed.

“Go lay down, baby.” You told her. “Mommy will be right back.” She did as told, climbing up on the mattress, and you backed back out, closing the door and turning around only to become face to face with Oscar.

His face was regretful to a start, but it turned hard when he saw your glare.

“What the hell is your problem?” You whisper-yelled, not wanting Lucía nor Cesar to hear you fight. “You never raise your voice around her!”

“You don’t get it.” He tried, speaking through gritted teeth and pulling a frustrated hand over his face in an attempt to not lose his cool again.

You only glared back, crossing your arms over your chest. “It doesn’t matter whether or not I get it.” You spat back, shaking your head.

“If you want to be angry when you’re by yourself, that’s fine, but we made an agreement when you came home that the anger stays outside the house. Your pent up anger isn’t just affecting you right now. It's affecting us. Me. Our children." You put a hand on your belly, giving him a pointed glare. “It needs to go. The anger needs to go.”

“Do you think it’s that easy?” He fired back, glowering down at you. “You think I should forgive him, is that it? You stand here defending him but you don’t know him. Not like I do. Not even close.”

“I’m saying you deserve it.” You whisper-yelled, uncrossing your arms and prodding a finger into his chest harshly.

You glared at him, letting your and drop back to your side and took a deep breath to calm yourself before continuing.

“You’re right.” You agreed, voice now quieter and your head shaking. “I don’t know him. I don’t even know whether or not he’s sorry for his actions, for leaving you behind like you were nothing to him. But either way you need to let that shit go. Not for him, not because he might apologize or acknowledge the pain he’s caused you but for you. Holding onto anger will only hurt you, make you do things you regret. Don’t make the same mistake he did, don’t hold on to the hurt, don’t go down that same road. You’ll end up right in his shoes in a few years if you do.”

A dark look crossed over his face, unlike anything you had ever seen before. Suddenly, you were backed into the wall behind you, his chest pressing against yours and his hand coming up to press against the wall beside your head as he glared, only millimeters away from your face. “Are you saying that I would leave my kids?”

You swallowed, your heart beating violently behind your chest at the new kind of proximity. Had you been in any other situation, you would have without a doubt gotten aroused by this side of him, but sadly, that was not the case.

“Of course I’m not.” You whispered, pressing the back of your head against the wall behind you, carefully reaching out and taking ahold of his other hand as a frown spread across your face. “I’m saying that if you don’t let that shit go, you’ll continue to be driven by hatred and anger and even if that won’t actively make you a bad father, it will come in the way of you being the best version of yourself, the version I know that you can be if only you let yourself.”

He listened to you intently, his eyes shutting tightly with anger and his nostrils flaring with anger.

But you continued, bringing his hand and placing it atop your belly, pressing your forehead against his. "I know you don’t want him around but if he wants to be there for them, I’m not going to rob them of that."

His head shook against yours and his hand balled into a fist at the side of your head. "He’s just gonna leave them like he left us. Like he left me."

"If so, we’ll take that if the time comes.” You continued trying to reason with him softly, but that had not been the right thing to say.

His eyes opened and in one hasty movement, he had removed his hand from your stomach and pushed himself away from you. "When that time comes, I’m not having that conversation with them. You are." He spat and you followed his example and pushed yourself away from the wall.

“Yeah. I’ll accept that.” You glared, swallowing. “But right now he’s making Lucía and Cesar happy and that’s all I care about.”

“What about my happiness, huh?” He questioned. “Doesn’t that mean shit to you anymore?”

“You’re not unhappy because he’s here.” You stated. “You’re unhappy because you’re holding on to the anger. You owe it to yourself and your family to let it go and move on. Not to him. You and us.”

“It’s not that simple.” He shook his head and you frowned.

“I know it’s not but it all begins and ends in your mind. What you give power to, has power over you. If you allow it.” You paused, looking around the hallway and letting out a deep breath. “I know you’re hurt but-“

“You don’t know anything about hurt!” He whisper-yelled at you, whipping around to face you again after having turned around.

Your heart fell in your chest and your jaw tensed as you met his eyes through the darkness. “Are you forgetting that I was left behind, too?” You whispered and only watched as he shook his head and turned away from you again.

“It’s not the same thing.”

This brought a surge of anger through your body, an anger you hadn’t felt in a very long time.

“No.” You scoffed. “Living your entire life in the middle of the system, being thrown between foster-people, all of whom were either toxic or abusive except one who died, like a fucking ragdoll with no human rights, is so much better.”

Your mind wandered back to Stanley who had taken you in when you were fifteen.

His wife had just passed away and as they had been living with infertility their entire lives, he didn’t have anyone left to keep him company. So in honor of his late wife’s memory, he decided to make one final difference in life and help a child in need.

Just like the system was portrayed in the movie ‘Instant Family’, no one ever wanted to adopt a teenager if it weren’t for the checks they got in the process, so you weren’t expecting anything. But much to yours and the social workers’ surprise, he took a liking to you.

Unfortunately, he passed on only six months later and as you were still a minor, you went right back into the system.

When you were seventeen you finally had enough of being mentally and physically abused by your foster parents all so that they would be able to get money from the state and left the center you were placed at.

You kept moving between your friends, living in their basements and attics one week at a time for almost six months until you met Oscar and slowly but surely started staying with him and Cesar.

You shook yourself free from the painful memories, forcing yourself to return to reality and noticing your eyes were now stinging with tears. But you weren’t discouraged, determined to let him hear what you had to say.

“I’ve been alone all my life. No family. Ever.” You sniffled, still glaring at him through your progressively blurring vision. “You’ve at least had Cesar and the Santos, somewhere to belong, which is more than I can say about myself. I’ve had no one but myself to count on and I finally have a family that loves me. I’m not going to lose that all because you can’t let go of the past. I hate him for leaving you, for hurting you, but he’s here now and there’s nothing neither of us can do about it but make the best of the situation for Cesar and Lucía’s sake.”

Hie eyes were burning holes into the floor and his body was tense and halfway twisted away from you, but you could still see from the side of his face that his gaze was concentrated.

No words left his mouth once you finished your little rant and for a moment, you thought that maybe you had managed to get your point across and gotten through to him, but then he wordlessly turned his back to you and began walking in the other direction.

Your heart instantly dropped in your chest and you called out for him. “Where are you going?”

“Out.” He answered coldly, not turning around and not stopping.

You rushed after him as fast as your feet could carry you and grabbed the back of his shirt, tugging him to a stop. “No, not like this, you’re not.” You protested. “We don’t leave each other upset. You know that.”

He reached around to his back and grabbed your hand, softly but firmly pulling it away from his shirt and turning around to look down at you. The glare that had previously been etched onto his face was gone now, but for some reason you found this new, emotionless expression worse.

“You’re standing here, defending him and taking his side over mine.” He spoke calmly, shaking his head. “I don’t have to stand here and listen to this shit. I’m not going to.”

“It’s not like that and you know it.” You tried sadly, attempting to intertwine your fingers with his with the hand that was still holding on to your wrist.

But he twisted his hand out of the way. “Lo que. I’m out.” He told you, dropping your wrist and turning back around. “Don’t wait up.”

He began walking away again and this time, you didn’t follow. “If you leave, you’re not sleeping here tonight.” You spoke after him, raising your voice slightly.

But he didn’t react, or at least he didn’t show it if he did. He just kept walking away from you, heading past the kitchen and straight for the front door, disappearing from your line of sight when he stepped outside.

The sound of the front door slamming shut behind him reached your ears a second later and caused you to flinch where you stood. The house was suddenly eerily quiet, the only sound being heard being the soft sobs coming from your bedroom.

Ray and Cesar were still sitting at the kitchen table and now that you had stepped out of the hallway to your room, you were on full display for them. But you didn’t say anything to them despite feeling their awkward but worried gazes at you.

Instead, you wordlessly turned around and headed back to your bedroom while sniffling against the back of your hand.

The second you were locked inside your bedroom, the tears started falling, and when seeing you cry, Lucía only cried harder.

You didn’t waste another second before heading over to the bed and getting in next to her, taking her in your lap as much as you could with your belly coming in the way. You stroked her hair, getting lost in thought.

You hated being as empathic as you were. In any other situation, you saw the personality trait as a blessing, but now… now it felt more like a curse.

Your heart bled for Oscar. You had experienced his hurt first-hand when your parents left you when you were little, along with every time the relatively nice foster parents had decided you weren’t the child they wanted and returned you to the foster care center.

You wanted to hate Ray for what he had done, for the hurt he had caused the man you loved, but no matter how much you tried, you just couldn’t, because you could see it so clearly in his face that he was trying to be better.

You sympathized with him, despite the fact that he was supposed to be- no, despite the fact that he was the bad guy in this scenario, and you hated it.

You hated that you couldn’t just snap your fingers and make it all alright, make everyone happy. Ray had only been back for a day and the hopelessness was already so overwhelming you could barely bear it.

Oscar drove to the beach that night. He sat there thinking about everything for hours, even when the final warmth had left the air and the harsh evening air started pulling at his clothes.

He had started off by thinking about his dad, about everything that had happened when he was young, but as soon as his anger melted off, Ray’s face was replaced by yours, and suddenly you were the only thing he could think about.

Not that it was a rare occurrence. Even though you had been together for so long, it happened far more often than he would like to admit.

You had always been there taking care of him and his mano in the midst of the gang wars, never losing your positivity despite the hardships you had endured throughout your life, and that’s what made him fall for you.

You were always smiling, always telling and showing people you believed in them, that their hopes and dreams were valid and reachable.

And there was your unwavering loyalty. He thought back to when you had only known each other for a year, how he had expected you to run the other way with your unborn baby when he got locked up. But you stayed, no matter how hard shit got for you on the outside.

You were twenty-three now and no matter how hard things got, you still stuck to his side through thick and thin, through things that would have had any other person fleeing for their lives a long time ago.

You had done nothing but stay positive about the little that you had through the sorrow of what could have been, and he knew he owed it to you now to do the same. Only, of course, he realized this far too late, like he always did.

By the time you heard the front door open and slam shut again, the clock on your bedside table were showing 2:42am and Lucía was sound asleep with her head in your lap.

You were stroking her long, black locks as you had for the past five hours; a trait she inherited from Oscar along with pretty much everything else.

She hadn’t gotten much from you, in truth, but you didn’t mind it. After all, Oscar was the love of your life, despite all the shit you had been through together.

Your cheeks were stiff and itchy with dried tears and you watched the clock turn from 2:42 to 2:43 just as the first knock was delivered to your bedroom door, followed by three more.

You heard a thud, most likely from his forehead hitting the door, and then came his voice, muffled through the thick piece of wood.

“Mi amor. Lo siento. Open the door, por favor.”

You carefully put Lucía’s head down on the pillow, grabbing more pillows and stuffing them under the mattress to stop her from falling down and tucked her in with a blanket before shuffling over to the door.

You twisted the lock and opened it, instantly coming face to face with a regretful Oscar. He tried to look inside and move past you, but you shoved him back, quietly closing the door behind you.

“She’s sleeping.” You whispered tiredly, your voice groggy.

“Tengo que verla.” He pleaded, but you shook your head, crossing your arms over your chest in an attempt to bring some warmth to your body to make up for the lack of body heat you had previously been receiving from your daughter.

“No, it took a long time to get her to fall asleep.” You protested again. “You’re not waking her up.”

You turned your gaze to the ground, leaning your back against the door and shivering slightly. You were tired, still shaken up and not really sure how to handle the situation seeing as you had never fought like this before.

Oscar, being able to read you like an open book, sensed your unsureness immediately and also took note of the fact that you were cold, carefully reaching his hands out to your upper arms.

Slowly, he pulled you toward him, testing the waters, and when he knew you wouldn’t blow up on him, he pulled you into his chest, wrapping his arms around you

Your eyes instantly fell shut at the feeling, a shock of warmth going through your body and your senses being invaded with his perfume and the smell of fresh air still lingering on his clothes.

“I shouldn’t have lost my temper around her.” He mumbled, leaning his chin on the top of your head.

You hummed tiredly, wrapping your arms around his torso and taking a step closer to him. “That’s right, you shouldn’t. But you can apologize to her in the morning. Not to me.” You replied, pressing your cheek into his chest. “I’m sorry if I made it seem like I was picking his side over yours. That’s not what I was trying to do at all, I just-“

“I know, mami. You were right.” He interrupted, moving his arms from around you to take your face in his hand, bringing his face down to yours. “I’m gonna try better. I want you, Lucía and Cesar to be able to live good, without all this negative energy and shit.”

You could sense that he still didn’t fully agree with you despite claiming that you had been right, but he said nothing more about it, changing the subject and asking; “Can I sleep with you? He’s got the couch, which you already know since you made it up for him.”

A sigh of annoyance left your nose at his moody remark, but you nodded, grabbing his hands. “Come on.”

You opened the door to your bedroom again and led him inside. His eyes instantly found Lucía’s form where she was snoring lightly in the bed, her face illuminated by the bright red light cast from the alarm clock beside the bed.

His eyes didn’t leave her once while he got out of his clothes and into bed and you followed his lead, getting in on the other side of your daughter. No more words were shared between you as you got comfortable, your hands just reaching over Lucía to intertwine, sleep coming quickly for both of you.

The next morning, you were all gathered in the kitchen slash living room, all of you getting ready for your respective days.

The atmosphere was still very much tense but after Oscar’s promise to you the night before, it was a lot less hostile.

After making sure Lucía had breakfast, you had left her with Oscar and Ray to go wake up Cesar and then you had left to go get dressed in proper clothing, not wanting to waltz around in Oscar’s oversized shirt all day.

You were just now returning to the kitchen, finding a very tired Cesar sitting beside Lucía with a sandwich and a glass of orange juice on the table in front of him, slowly eating his breakfast while looking through an old Garfield comic with his niece.

On the other side of the table, Oscar was watching them silently while drinking coffee from his usual black coffee mug and Ray was minding his own business over by the couch, getting ready for his first day at work.

As you rounded the corner and entered their field of view, Oscar’s face instantly pulled into a smirk. You stopped beside him and his hand found its way to your ass in no time, pinching it cheekily.

“You’re looking fine today, mami.” He said, smirking.

You raised an eyebrow at him, unimpressed. “Really? Because I feel like a whale on the verge of bursting.” You replied crankily, only causing him to laugh and pull you down onto his lap.

“No, stop, Oscar. I’m heavy.” You protested, immediately trying to stand up again and free him from your weight.

But his arms were wrapped securely around you, his hands already having found their way to your stomach where they were now rubbing soft circles over your shirt, his lips making contact with your arm from behind you. “No estás pesada para mi.”

“You look beautiful, (Y/N).” Cesar joined in, agreeing with his brother, and Lucía wasn’t far behind, speaking out through a mouthful of cereal.

“Yeah, mamá.”

You chuckled lightly, your face pulling into a wide smile at their words in combination with the feeling of Oscar continuously pressing kisses against your arm while rubbing your stomach.

“Thank you, my babies.” You replied, leaning out of Oscar’s grasp for the briefest of second to press a kiss each to their cheeks.

In response, their grins only widened, both of their mouths full of food and looking nearly identical with the way their eyes squinted when they smiled.

But Oscar wasn’t as impressed as you returned to his arms. “You giving out kisses to my mano but none for me? You’re gonna make me jealous.” He tutted behind you and you rolled your eyes.

Turning around, you were met with his smirk, the smug bastard you oh so loved already having been expecting you to turn around. Without saying another word, you brought your hands up to cradle his face and brought your lips down to his, his hands still rubbing your stomach affectionately.

Cesar and Lucía made mocking sounds of disgust from their spots, fooling around with each other and causing you both to chuckle against each other’s lips, but you kept kissing, only breaking apart when Ray cleared his throat from the sofa.

Your faces came apart and you turned to look at him, finding him now standing awkwardly by the front door dressed in a black t-shirt with ‘Dwayne’s Joint BBQ’ printed across the chest.

“I’m off to Dwayne’s. I’ll see you all later.” He spoke lowly and your eyes furrowed together.

“No breakfast?” You asked, and he looked at you, but before he could answer for himself, Oscar’s voice spoke up from behind you.

“He doesn’t like eating in the morning.”

Both you and Ray turned to look at him, but he avoided your eyes, his face now free of emotion again as he picked his coffee cup back up and wordlessly took a sip.

You smiled fondly at him, placing your hand on top of the one that was still resting on your stomach, before turning back forward to see Cesar standing up.

“I’ll walk with you!” He exclaimed excitedly while shoving the rest of the sandwich into his mouth, reaching out for his school bag on the chair next to his and without as much as a goodbye, he had walked out the door behind Ray, leaving the three of you alone.

“Alrighty, then.” You drawled, the last minute having gone by so quickly, and turned back to Oscar. “Any plans for today, baby?”

With Ray gone, the tension from his body melted right off.

He put the coffee mug back down on the table and wrapped his arms around you again. “Nah. Thought I’d just spend the day with my two favourite girls. Go for a drive, maybe take a walk on the beach.”

You hummed, leaning back into his chest while holding on to his hand on your belly. “That sounds nice.” You smiled, turning your attention to your daughter and stretching your foot out under the table, nudging one of her legs. “Do you want to go to the beach?”

Lucía nodded, but made no move to look up from her comic, simply shoving more cereal into her mouth and starting to kick her legs more violently underneath the table judging by the way said table was shaking.

You raised your eyebrows at her, turning back to Oscar to see him watching her with an identical expression before turning to meet your eyes.

“She gets that from you.”

“Yeah, yeah.” You rolled your eyes, a small smile playing at your lips. “Well, if we’re going outside you’re going to have to help me get my shoes on because I’m too fat to reach my feet.”

He chuckled but didn’t protest, urging you to stand up. You did as told and took his seat when he left to retrieve your shoes from over by the front door. Wordlessly, he helped you get them onto your feet and tied the laces into flawless knots before taking your hands in his.

“Come on, fatass.” He teased.

You raised an eyebrow, allowing him to pull you up. “Who you calling a fatass, fatass?”

“You called yourself a fatass a second ago, dumbass.” He fired back and to this, you raised your other eyebrow, as well.

“Oh, I’m a dumbass, too, now?”

He just smirked at you, pulling you into his chest in an embrace and bending down to kiss you as his hand pinched your butt.

“Dumbass is a bad word.” Lucía spoke up from the table and you laughed, cutting the kiss short, turning to look at her while nodding your head.

“You’re right, it is. Bad daddy.”

“Bad daddy.” She agreed, glaring at Oscar who playfully raised his eyebrows in return.

Lucía, now having finished her breakfast and apparently having had enough of Garfield for this morning, went and changed out of her pajamas into some regular clothes, and then the three of you locked up the house and headed out in the Impala.

You left the streets of Freeridge and drove around Los Angeles for a good hour before you headed back and found yourselves at the beach, and once there, you spent a good two hours thanks to Lucía refusing to leave.

You bought a bag of bread at the store before going there so that she could throw it to the seagulls, and once the annoying, screeching birds made an appearance, it was near impossible to get her back into the car.

But you managed in the end, even though she cried pretty much the entire ride home.

Once you were back home, you took her to bed for a much-needed nap while Oscar went out again to deal with some business, Sad Eyes having been waiting in front of the house when you got back.

When you had finally managed to get her to sleep, you had moved to get out of the bed and go tend to the chores that needed doing, but just as you were about to stand up, Oscar had come back in and laid down with you.

You lost track of how long you just laid there. You didn’t speak a word to each other, just drifting in and out of sleep while waiting for Lucía to wake up again.

His arms were wrapped around you from behind, instinctively moving around on your stomach and squeezing gently in hope to feel a kick.

When the times came where there actually was a kick, he always had his hands in the wrong place, which in turn forced you to constantly move them around with your own.

Lucía woke up some time later, but by then, you had both managed to fall asleep, and she had not-so-graciously woken you up by hitting you both in the head with a book that she wanted you to read for her.

Oscar had accepted the task. He wasn’t doing much reading, just flipping through the book and looking at the pictures, but she wasn’t complaining.

“Can we eat the ice cream Abuelo bought for me yesterday?” She spoke up then after a long while of silence and your eyes instantly switched to Oscar, awaiting his reaction, but he barely even reacted at all.

“Yeah.” He only replied calmly without looking away from the book, flipping the page.

While she reached out and touched the butterfly now presented before her, touching the purple glitter, he looked at her from the side. “I’m sorry I got angry and yelled last night, princesita. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

She didn’t answer, just keeping her eyes on the butterfly and wrapping her arms around his neck, pressing her cheek to his in a way that made her entire face scrunch up at the force.

He pressed a kiss to her temple, flipping the page again.

A few minutes later, you found yourself sitting around the table in the kitchen, each with a bowl of ice cream in front of you and conversing easily while you ate.

The front door opened then and all of your heads turned to see Cesar jogging inside with his school bag slung over his shoulder.

“Have a good day at school?” You asked with a smile, and he smiled back, nodding.

“Yeah, thanks.” He hurried out, rushing over to you and hastily kissing yours and Lucía’s cheeks, bumping his fist against Oscar’s in a quick greeting.

“You want some ice cream, mano?” Oscar asked before putting another spoonful of the ice cream into his mouth, giving his brother an amused smirk.

Cesar only shook his head, going over to the kitchen island where he dropped his bag at Lucía’s barstool. “No, I’m meeting up with dad at Dwayne’s. He gets off work in five minutes.” He answered quickly and barely even spared you another glance as he headed for the front door.

But he stopped himself suddenly and turned back around, and you raised an eyebrow at him as he jogged over to where you sat and took your spoon from your hand, scooping some of your ice cream into his mouth and giving you a goofy grin.

“Thanks, bye.” He gave your spoon back to you and rushed back for the door, this time not turning around.

You chuckled at his antics, going back to your ice cream, but beside you, Oscar had now put his spoon down and pushed his bowl away from him on the table.

Lucía noticed this in an instant and immediately claimed his bowl, pulling it over to her. You watched as she began eating from both of the bowl, all while Oscar stared into the table, obviously disappointed that Cesar hadn’t joined you.

You slowly reached your hand out over the table to take his in yours, giving it a comforting squeeze. He squeezed it back, pulling a hand over his face, before standing up and leaving the table to go outside for a smoke.

The fact that Cesar was suddenly looking up to his dad more than he hurt him, that much was clear in your eyes no matter how much he would try to hide it.

But he still didn’t want to hover and be an ass by forcing him to spend time with him, which was why come Saturday morning, you saw the perfect opportunity for them to spend some good old brotherly time together and pushed them to take it.

Oscar was, like every other morning, sitting at table in the kitchen slash living room. Seeing as it was Saturday, you had slept in today, the clock showing eleven by the time you had finished eating breakfast.

Ray had left for work when you had still been asleep and Cesar and Lucía were still sleeping, for the time being giving you the rest of the house to yourselves for the first time since he had returned.

You were on day six of him staying with you now and during that time, you had learned the hard way that he wasn’t the most organized or clean person, leaving clothes and food out all over the house.

The living room was smelling like a literal garbage dump, a mess of suspicious food occupying the coffee table over by the sofa.

You had attempted to clean said mess the second you had woken up, but Oscar hadn’t let you, saying that you weren’t his maid and that he could clean his mess up himself, so you tried your very best to ignore the awful smell while you had your breakfast.

Thankfully, it wasn’t a very big struggle once you got your mind on other things. It would have been worse, for sure, if you would have been at the beginning of your pregnancy. Had that been the case, you wouldn’t have been able to hold your food down.

Once you heard the bubbling of the coffee machine slow down in the kitchen, you stood up from your seat at the table and walked over. On your way, you cranked open the kitchen window, hoping that a bit of fresh air would help with the smell.

You then brought Oscar’s usual black coffee cup down from its cupboard and filled it up with coffee, leaving a little bit of space for the milk that you poured in when you passed the refrigerator, and then waddled back over to him where he was boredly flicking through Lucía’s Garfield comic.

“Here you go, papi.” You said as you reached him, putting down the coffee cup in front of him, careful not to spill any on the magazine because if you did, you knew hell would be unleased when its owner woke up.

Oscar looked up at you, closing the comic and pushing it to the side and pulling you into his lap by your arms. “Gracias, mamas.” He thanked you, raising his head in an indication for you to come closer.

And you did just that, leaning your head down to press a kiss to his lips. You smiled against his lips and he hummed, his hands contently rubbing along the sides of your thighs.

You didn’t get a lot of moments with just Oscar anymore so you took your sweet time with each other, slowly moving your lips together in synchronization.

Whenever you had some free time on your hands, he always had some illegal shit to take care of. When he had some time to spare, you always had some errands to run and when you both, against all odds, had some free time, Lucía was always there with you.

It was risky getting frisky in the open, you knew, as anyone could’ve walked right in on it, but in that moment you didn’t care.

Your hands slowly moved over his arms, shoulders and neck, coming up to grab his face to pull his face even closer to yours, and his hands moved to your butt, turning you more against him in his lap.

It wasn’t the most gracious embrace with your giant stomach coming in the middle, but it was comfortable anyhow, his touches sending small holts of electricity through your body

“Good morn-“ Cesar stopped himself in the doorway as he entered the living room just then.

You broke apart from the kiss, both out of breath, and looked over at him just in time to see his entire face scrunch up in disgust. But not because of what he had just walked in on. No, that he was used to, more so than he would like to admit.

Instead, he started sniffing the air, looking around and not even blinking an eye to the intimate moment he had just caught you in.

“Agh, dude. What is that smell?” He asked and Oscar wasted no time in pointing to the coffee table.

“Chicken.” He spoke out in an annoyed voice, shaking his head and getting defensive at the look his mano was suddenly giving him. “Don’t look at me.”

Cesar glared back at him. “Look, he’s been gone 12 years. I just want a chance to get to know him.” He said.

Oscar nodded, one of his hands leaving your butt to pick up his coffee mug. “Then you can clean up after him. I’ve got bigger things to worry about. Block’s been quiet.” He said, bringing the mug to his lips and taking a big gulp.

Cesar stared at him and it was only then you noticed the towel hanging from his hand, the realization that he was wearing swimming trunks hitting you shortly after.

He then went to move past you where you sat and Oscar put down the mug and stood up on his feet in no time, still holding on to your waist as you stood up with him and reaching his other hand out to catch Cesar’s shoulder.

“Hey, where you going?”

Cesar gave him an obvious look. “Duh. The pool. It’s open.” He answered rudely and Oscar raised his eyebrows at him.

“Not before you clean up that nasty ass chicken.”

“The chicken can wait a few more hours.” You heard yourself speak before you had even gotten the time to process the thought in your head, but when they turned to look at you, there was no going back, their looks urging to you to continue. “You’re taking Lucía and going with your mano to the pool.”

“Mamas-“

“No.” You interrupted Oscar, pushing at his chest. “Go wake her up and I’ll pack you a bag. Cesar can clean up when he comes home.”

You smiled at him and out of the corner of your eye, you could see Cesar’s face lighting up into a smile to his brother, too.

Said brother glared down at you and you could practically hear his thoughts; you were being too easy on Cesar.

But he didn’t say anything, only turning on his heel and heading to your bedroom to bid to your command.

Meanwhile, you packed his and Lucía’s swimming suits into a bag along with two towels and her Winnie The Pooh bathrobe, a bottle of sunscreen, some water and sandwiches for lunch and of course, the worn-out Garfield comic that she always had to “read” when she ate.

After a good five minutes of convincing Oscar that you would be alright on your own for a few hours, they left for the pool and the second they were out of the house, you laid down in your bed and fell asleep again.

By the time you woke up again the alarm clock by your side was showing 3:27pm, meaning you had been asleep for a good three and a half hours.

You had totally intended to let Cesar clean up the mess left behind by his dad by himself to a start, but after doing two loads of laundry and vacuuming and dusting his room like you had put a pin in a few days ago, you were left restless and bored while awaiting someone’s return and company.

So you brought out a plastic bag and began cleaning off the trash on the coffee table, having to scrub it down with gloves in order to get the juices of the old, rotten chicken out of the wood.

And of course, Oscar had chosen that time out of all the times to return home.

Lucía had run straight past you into her room, her hair still wet and her body dressed in her swimsuit and bathrobe.

While she disappeared down the hallway to your room, Cesar and Oscar stopped in the doorway of the front door at the sight of you scrubbing away at the table, meeting your eyes with different expressions on their faces.

Cesar’s was a mixture of gratefulness that you had relieved him of his work, and nervousness as he knew what was about to come.

Not wanting to be around when shit went down, he slipped off to his room after kissing you hello, leaving you alone with Oscar who was glaring coldly at you for doing the exact thing he had told you not to do.

But he hadn’t said a word, simply taking the trash bag standing by your side and taking it with him outside.

Dinner was tenser than usual that afternoon and when you had shut yourself into your room to put Lucía to sleep later that night, you listened as Oscar yelled his father out in Spanish, pointing out that you were heavily pregnant and still did more around the house than he did.

You couldn’t hear any of Ray’s replies as he was clearly talking with a normal indoors voice, Oscar being the only one yelling, but come next morning when you were cleaning away after Cesar’s breakfast, Ray got out of the sofa and told you to sit down and let him do it.

Surprised, you did as told, the two of you conversing while he cleaned and even fixed you breakfast.

He was obviously trying his hardest to earn his stay, he just hadn’t gotten the routine in yet. You knew Oscar was having a harder time accepting his presence, but you were grateful that he was even trying.

Oscar came out from shower a few minutes later to find his dad feeding Lucía yogurt, the two of them chatting away about Garfield while you sat eating the toast he had fixed you up before she had joined you at the table.

He obviously approved of the change in his dad’s behavior because he served himself a cup of coffee and sat down at the table rather than leaving the room, but he still didn’t say anything.

For the next two weeks, they barely spoke a word to each other. Ray tried to spark up conversations every day to a start but he stopped when he realized he wasn’t making any progress, respecting Oscar’s unspoken wish to be left alone.

Whenever Ray would volunteer to look after Lucía, Oscar would just stare at him with distaste as you agreed, while you, for one, were just happy to see her having so much fun.

He was great with her, taking her out for ice cream, bringing her back small toys when he came home from work and spoiling her rotten to the extent he could with his small income.

On the afternoons Oscar were out handing gang-related things, Ray started walking with you and getting her from daycare so that you didn’t have to walk by yourself, which in turn resulted in Oscar making sure he was free around that time every day to minimize the time you and Lucía spent with him.

He did everything in his power to keep you away from him without actually speaking his concerns out loud, not wanting a repeat of the first night. But whatever he did, everyone but him just seemed to grow closer to Ray and it made him furious.

He was now on his third week staying with you, it was a Friday afternoon and you were just coming back from having picked Lucía up from daycare.

Oscar was walking behind you with her sleeping form held tightly against his chest, his arms wrapped around her back and her head resting on his shoulder, her thumb sucked into her mouth and her comfort blanket hanging from her hand.

You were walking ahead and stepped through the front door first, holding it open for him so that he could walk inside without bumping Lucía into the doorway.

While he disappeared straight down the hallway to put Lucía to bed, you spotted Cesar lying back-down on the couch, his face illuminated by the bright light streaming from his phone that was held over his face.

He barely even noticed your presence, concentrated on whatever it was he was doing on his phone and you raised an eyebrow at this, shrugging your jacket off and dumping it on the chair across from the couch.

Before you could say anything to him, though, Oscar walked back into the living room. “Where’s dad?” He wasted no time asking and only then did Cesar look away from his phone, surprised to see two pairs of eyes at him.

He shrugged his shoulders at the question. “I thought he went with (Y/N) to pick up Lucí.”

“No, I did.” Oscar answered immediately, narrowing his eyes slightly and taking a step forward.

Cesar gave him a look. “Yeah, I can see that.” He shrugged again, turning back to his phone, not seeming very bothered. “He’s probably still at work.”

Oscar snorted. “He got off at four. It’s almost seven.”

As the brothers kept bickering back and forth about Ray’s whereabouts, a bad feeling settled in the pit of your stomach and before you could even register that your body was moving, your feet carried you over to the kitchen island where your wallet was laying on full display.

With a shaky hand, you opened it, and instantly got your suspicions confirmed.

“Shit.” You swore quietly under your breath, hanging your head down.

But no matter how lowly you had spoken, Oscar had heard you and walked over to you, asking. “What?”

You looked at him, guilt and pity building up in your chest. Could he really have been right about Ray all this time? Had you been naïve and misinterpreted his affection for Cesar and Lucía?

“My bus card isn’t in my wallet.” You answered finally, keeping your voice down so that Cesar wouldn’t hear you and get any ideas.

A glare instantly settled over his face, and he didn’t bother keeping his voice down as he shook his head. “What did I tell you? Huh?” He questioned, and Cesar, sensing the atmosphere taking a turn for the worse, walked over.

“What’s going on?” He looked between you with a questioning glance and Oscar let out a humorless laugh.

“You gonna tell him?” He asked and you closed your eyes, pinching the bridge of your nose and breathing out before looking back at Cesar.

“My bus card isn’t in my wallet and it was when we left an hour ago.”

Cesar’s face turned cold almost immediately, his eyes hardening as he understood what you were insinuating. “No.” He shook his head, taking a step back and clenching his fists at his sides. “No. He wouldn’t just leave. Not without saying goodbye.”

“Yeah, he would.” Oscar let out a scoff, followed closely by a dry laugh.

You sent him a glare at his insensitivity, but before you got the time to tell him off about it, Cesar whipped around to look at him and prodded a sharp finger into his chest

“Of course he would, with the way you’ve been treating him!” The youngest Diaz brother exclaimed angrily, tears already building up in his eyes as the panic settled in him. “I just got him back and now you’ve pushed him away, why do you always ruin everything good in my life?!”

Oscar looked at his brother with hard eyes and stood quietly, just taking on his rage, but the way his Adam’s apple bobbled in his throat indicated that he wasn’t feeling as unbothered about the situation as he put on.

Just the thought of how broken he would be if Ray actually left again caused your heart to tug in your chest, even more so when you realized you would be the one left behind to pick up the pieces not only from Oscar’s broken heart but Cesar’s too.

“Cesar, calm down.” You tried reasoning with him, putting a calming hand on his shoulder. “We don’t know what’s going on yet. We can’t just rush to conclusions, maybe he just-“

“There is no maybe!” Oscar exclaimed, turning to look at you and in turn causing you to look back to him. “He left, like I told you he would. This shit’s on you.”

“Don’t blame her.” Cesar instantly jumped to your defense, getting up in his brother’s face. “This is your fault. Not hers. She’s done nothing but try to make him feel welcome.”

They glared at each other, both clenching their fists at their sides and not moving a single muscle. You were left not knowing what to do, your heart beating violently in your ribcage, your pulse deafening in your ears.

But then the front door opened, and all of you turned your heads to the source of the disruption, holding your breaths as you watched Ray walk inside with several paper bags balanced in his arms.

He hadn’t noticed you yet, busying himself with kicking a pair of shoes out of the doorway in order to be able to get in without dropping the bags.

After stepping inside, he turned around and closed the door behind him softly, and then he turned around to face you, stopping in his tracks once he caught sight of you.

His eyes turned unsure as he became aware of the tense atmosphere and the threatening stance both of his sons were standing in.

He looked at them for a moment, silently wondering what was going on, and then turned his gaze to you.

When your eyes met his, you felt more relieved than you had ever done in your life before. Not just for Cesar’s sake, but also for Oscar’s, because no matter how much he would have tried to deny it, you knew that it would have absolutely broken him if he left again.

He had been forced to grow up early in life when having the responsibility of raising his brother on his own thrown on him, but inside of him there was still a small part of the little boy he had been back then and that small part craved his father’s attention and presence.

He tried so hard not to show it, to not show himself weak by covering his true feelings up with the hate and spite he had taught himself to feel for his dad, but deep down, he still loved him. You knew it, he knew it and you were pretty sure Ray knew it too, and that it was therefore that he always kept trying to talk to him.

“Everything okay here?” Ray was the one to finally break the silence and at the sound of his voice, both brothers seemed to relax, their shoulders slumping and their glares faltering.

While Oscar looked at him with a foreign expression, unreadable even for you, Cesar looked at him with pure relief.

Ray noticed this, giving his youngest a worries look when he caught sight of the tears built up in his eyes. “You alright, mijo?”

Cesar offered him a watery smile before turning back to glare at Oscar. “I told you he wouldn’t leave.” He spat out shortly, not saying another word to any of you before walking off, the sound of his bedroom door slamming shut reaching your ears a few seconds later.

The three of you were left in silence again and Ray awkwardly looked between the two of you. He carefully balanced the bags with one of his arms, slowly reaching his other hand into his back pocket do grab something.

Once he got a hold of whatever object it was, he held it out for you and you realized quickly that it was your bus card.

"The fridge was empty so I borrowed your bus card to go to the store.” He informed you. “Wanted to save you the trouble of going on your own. I hope that's alright."

A smile pulled at your lips as you took the card back from him. "Of course. Thank you." You thanked him, but Oscar wasn’t as impressed.

His face pulled into a nasty glare, eyes narrowed to the point where they were just lines of eyelashes.

“Did you take her credit card too?” He attacked, his entire stance rigid.

He wouldn’t admit it but you could read him like an open book, see that he had gotten scared and was now trying to cover up the vulnerability with anger; the only way he knew how.

Ray turned to look at him with an offended look crossing over his features. “I know I’m not the best person but-“

“You’re not.” Oscar quickly interrupted. “You’re as bad as they come.”

Ray nodded, not even bothering to deny his son’s accusations because he knew it was true. “But I would never steal from family.” He finished the sentence he had been trying to get out before being interrupted.

Without waiting for another reply from Oscar, probably knowing that he was just going to keep fighting, he turned to you, now with a smile on his lips. “I got you something.”

Your eyes instantly flickered to Oscar who was now narrowing his eyes in suspicion, but while he kept glaring, you only perked up with curiosity, following Ray as he walked over to the kitchen island to put the bags down, watching as he began rummaging through one of them.

“It’s in here somewhere…” He mumbled to himself while unpacking the bag in order to get a better view of what was inside, and no longer than a few seconds later, you watched as he pulled out a small, white baby bodysuit.

He smiled as he unfolded the tiny piece of clothing and turned it around, and your eyes widened at the sight of the words printed across the front in shimmery, golden letters.

‘Mommy and Daddy’s Little Saint’.

The smile on Ray’s face was genuinely excited as he proudly presented his find. “For the baby. You know, Saint as in Santo.” He explained. “It’s white so it works for both a girl and a boy.”

Tears welled up in your eyes as you took it from him, feeling the soft fabric under your touch and tracing your fingers over the letters.

Before you could stop yourself, you had wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him as close as your stomach would allow.

His hands unsurely found their way to your back, patting you lightly.

“Thank you.” You mumbled into his shoulder, completely oblivious to the look Oscar was giving you.

Ray patted your hair and hugged you back, frowning slightly as he didn’t know why you were getting so emotional. “No problem, mija.” He answered, and that’s when the hormones got the best of you and everything just came crashing down.

You tore yourself out of his embrace and put the bodysuit down on the barstool by the kitchen island before wordlessly hurrying down the hallway, closing yourself into the bathroom.

You liked to convince yourself that you weren’t affected by your parents, or lack thereof, and you usually weren’t, but when you were pregnant you leaned pretty quickly that it was a subject to stay away from.

Just the mere thought of them could make everything, all the pain you had been forced to withstand through your life, come flooding back in one moment, and despite his past record of walking out on his family, Ray still had a natural fatherly feel to him.

When you hugged him and heard him use the nickname that so many parents used to show affection for their kids, something you had never gotten to experience before, all of it just got too overwhelming for you.

Ray was rooted to his spot, looking at you with shock written all over his face. He turned to Oscar, who was still watching him with squinted eyes, although now a lot less hostile.

“Did I do something wrong?” He asked, and Oscar just sniffed, walking over to him.

“No. She gets like that.” He said, picking the bodysuit up from the barstool when he got close enough to reach it, taking a look at it for himself and turning his lips down in a ‘not bad’-expression. “This is nice. She appreciates it.”

He ripped the tag off the hem and began folding it, ignoring the way Ray’s gaze was burning into the side of his face.

“And you?” Ray asked, and Oscar nodded, avoiding his gaze.

“Yeah.” He answered simply before walking over to the side of the front door where your hospital bag stood at the ready, picking it up and packing down the bodysuit.

Ray watched him from where he stood, not really sure what to say. “Do you need to go check on her?” He asked finally after a few seconds of silence, and once again, Oscar barely spared him as much as a glance.

“No. She wants to be alone when she gets like that. Hormones and shit. She’ll be back soon.” He replied, putting the bag back down and heading for the fridge by the couch.

Ray nodded, his eyes following Oscar as he moved around. He watched as he brought a beer out from the fridge and walked over to the table with it in hand, and as he sat down and grabbed the bottle-opener, snapping the metal lid off and wasting no time in bringing the bottle to his lips, taking a large gulp.

Oscar let out an annoyed sigh, feeling the stare burning into the side of his face.

“What?” He asked without looking up from the table, and Ray’s face changed to one of confusion.

“What?” He asked back, and finally, Oscar looked up to meet his gaze.

“You’re looking at me like you got something to say so speak.”

Ray gave him a hesitant look. “I’ve been here three weeks and I haven’t heard anything about her parents. Got me wondering, is all.” He spoke slowly.

Oscar nodded, looking at him for a few more seconds before turning his attention back to the table, lifting the bottle of beer to his lips for another sip. “She has no parents.” He replied. “Cesar, Lucía and I are all she’s got.”

“Where are they?”

“Left her with her babysitter when she was five to go get dinner, never came back. She grew up in the system.”

“You sure nothing happened to them?” Ray questioned, his voice still careful, almost as if one wrong word would make Oscar blow up. And in truth, it probably would.

“No.” He took another gulp of his beer. “They left a note.”

Ray’s face fell, his hands gripping at the edge of the kitchen island behind him. “That’s rough.”

“Mhm.” Oscar hummed, moving a small piece of cereal around on the table in front of him, left behind from Cesar and Lucía’s breakfast earlier that morning.

“For what it’s worth-“

Oscar’s head instantly whipped up, a hard glare crossing his features. “Whatever it is, it’s not worth shit.” He spat, causing Ray to flinch back slightly.

But no matter how discouraged he got, he continued. “I’m sorry I never called or wrote. If I could take it back and do it differently, I would.”

“But you can’t.” Oscar glared and Ray shook his head.

“No, I cant.” He agreed. “I already told Cesar this the other day but if I got the chance to choose my kids, I would choose the two of you every time. You’ve had it rough, been down the same path I’ve been stuck on all my life. But I’m proud of you, mijo. Of what you’ve got going on here. I know you don’t want me around but I’m not here to stir shit up for you. I’m here to make things right.”

Oscar looked up at his dad while he spoke, listening to him intently and not interrupting him once. The glare on his face was gone when he finished. However, the hard look in his eyes remained in his eyes as he answered.

“You can’t. It’s too late for that.”

But Ray only started back. “That doesn’t mean I should stop trying.”

Oscar nodded in response, the two of them holding their eye-contact as a comfortable silence fell over them. Half a minute later, Oscar finally broke the stare, turning his gaze to the side as he took another swig of his beer before putting it down on the table.

He stood up and headed over to the fridge again, wordlessly bringing out another bottle and heading back to the table where he snapped the cap off.

Grabbing his beer, he walked over to Ray where he was standing by the kitchen island and shoved the untouched beer into his chest, pushing past him and walking around the counter.

Ray took it and turned around, meeting Oscar’s eyes over the counter as he motioned for the bags that were still just standing around. “Make yourself useful.” He ordered, and without waiting for a response, he began unpacking the bags, Ray following his example after taking a sip of his beer.

Half an hour later, your hormones had calmed down, allowing you to stop crying about the bodysuit and exit the bathroom again after freshening yourself up by splashing some cold water into your face.

You slowly and quietly walked down the hallway, slowing down slightly as you reached the corner at the sound of Ray and Oscar’s voices.

“Do it like this instead.” You heard Ray instruct, and Oscar’s annoyed reply came only a second later.

“I know how to cut a jalapeño, anciano.”

“You’re getting the seeds everywhere. They’re supposed to stay on the core.”

“You do it if you’re so much better.”

You slowly rounded the corner, careful not to make a sound.

Your eyes found the two of them in the kitchen immediately, standing side by side. The kitchen lamp was shining down on them and on the stove, something was frying in a pan.

Oscar stood taller than his dad by at least five inches, yet he somehow still looked smaller beside him. Maybe it was the momentarily vulnerable look that crossed over his face when his dad reached out and took the knife from his hand that caused the illusion.

“You cut the tip of first and then stand it up, hold the stem and cut down from the bottom. And then you can dice the slices.” Ray calmly showed him how he was supposed to cut it and even though Oscar’s eyes remained guarded, he watched. “No seeds, no mess. You try it.”

Oscar muttered some Spanish curse word under his breath, but still snatched the knife back from his dad’s hand and did as he had just been shown.

You took that as your cue to make yourself known, waddling into the kitchen with one hand on your stomach and the other at the small of your back for support.

Their head rose in sync when hearing you approaching, their hands stopping what they were doing. Oscar greeted you with a kiss and Ray greeted you with a smile, neither of them bringing up the way you had just ran off earlier of which you were grateful.

You took a seat on the barstool and only a minute later, a now calm Cesar appeared from his room and joined you in watching his dad and mano cook dinner together.

Things were still not all okay, far from it, but even a blind person could have seen that you were making huge progress, and in that moment, it was enough for everyone to be civil with each other, which was more than could be said about the past three weeks.

After dinner, Cesar had gone over to Monse’s house and you and Oscar moved into your bedroom where Lucía was still sleeping soundly in the bed while ray went to sleep in the couch.

You moved around the room, getting ready for bed quietly to not wake her up. While you were changing into your nightshirt over by the closed window, Oscar was sitting at the side of the bed, pulling his white tank top over his head.

Once you were properly dressed for bed, you wordlessly climbed onto the mattress, wrapping your arms around Oscar’s shoulder from behind and pressing a kiss to his bare shoulder.

He turned his head to look at you, but before he could say or do anything, his phone lit up on the nightside table, starting to vibrate as a call came through.

You released his shoulders and sat back, watching as he took the phone and stood up, answering the call.

“Sí?” He spoke into the phone. You could hear someone talking on the other side of the call, but you couldn’t identify the voice or the words spoken.

Oscar whipped around to face you then, causing you to jump. “When?” He asked the person, and you watched with growing worry as a dark look crossed over features and he pulled a hand over his face. “Yeah, I’ll take care of it. I’ll call you back. Cuídate.”

He hung up and quickly started pulling on his clothes again, causing you to rush out of the bed. “Who was it?” You asked, your heart beating rapidly in your chest.

“Mario.” He replied without looking at you, pulling his tank top over his head and going over to the drawer in the corner of the room, where you knew he kept his gun.

“Since when does Mario call you?” You asked, eyebrows furrowing together and arms crossing over your chest.

He unlocked the top drawer of the dresser and wasted no time in bringing the gun out. “Since Cesar, his brother and their friends got caught up with Cuchillos.”

“What?!” You exclaimed before you could stop yourself, and the two of you instantly turned around to look at Lucía who was now stirring in her sleep. But luckily, she didn’t wake up.

You turned back to Oscar, finding him already looking at you. “Her men kidnapped them a few weeks ago and offered them the Rollerworld money back if they finished a job for her. It’s taking them to long, she’s getting impatient. She broke into Monse’s house yesterday and Ruby’s house just now, threatened their families.”

“What? Kidnapped? Why the fuck am I only just hearing about this now?” You asked, eyes widening. “Is that why Cesar was in such a hurry to get to Monse’s? What kind of job could Cuchillos possibly want a group of teenagers for?”

Oscar looked away from you, loading the clip into the gun. “Tracking down Lil’ Ricky.”

“What?” You whisper-yelled, not really sure what you were supposed to think anymore. “Isn’t he dead?”

Oscar glanced at you. “No.”

Your eyebrows creased together. “How do you know?”

“Because I helped them dig up his grave.” He replied as if it was the most natural thing in the world to do. But it wasn’t.

Your eyebrows shot up in disbelief, barely believing what you were hearing. “You did what now?”

Your head was spinning. You didn’t know what the hell was going on at this point, you were being given far too much information at once and you weren’t able to process it.

You had known about the Rollerworld money, of course, as they had been used in the whole plot to buy Cesar’s freedom back and get the Prophets off the streets, but the rest of it… it was all new to you, this being the first time you were hearing about it.

You’d had absolutely no idea that Cuchillos had roped in the kids, and it got you wondering how long it had gone on behind your back.

“I have to go take care of this.” Oscar turned to you then, tucking the gun into the waistband of his pants and pulling his tank top over it.

Your teeth started chewing at the inside of your cheek automatically, the worry only intensifying by every second passing. “What are you going to do?”

He took a step closer to you, grabbing your face in his hands. “Don’t worry your pretty head about it, mamas. I’ll be fine.” He promised.

You stared up at him, placing your hands on top of his. “Please tell me you’re not going after Cuchillos.” You pleaded, and the look on his face revealed that it was exactly what he was going to do.

In that moment, it really hit you how much information Oscar must have kept from you throughout your relationship and it didn’t sit well with you at all.

Not because he hadn’t told you, but because he could have been in life-threatening situations more times than you could count, and you wouldn’t even have known about it.

As if being able to read your thoughts, Oscar leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips, pulling away and moving one of his hands to stroke your belly. “I’ll be fine.” He promised again. “I’ll be here when you wake up and we’ll start fresh. Prometo.”

With that, he lowered his hand to hook his pinky with yours, and as he left, you took his word for it. But when you woke up the next morning, you were alone.

Or well, not entirely alone; Lucía was still there, of course. But Oscar wasn’t. He never got home like he told you he would and you were worried sick.

But despite the sickening worry you pushed through and went on with your day as you usually would with a lot of help from Ray, who had called in sick to work when you had told him about Oscar’s approximate whereabouts.

He didn’t want to leave you home alone with your due date being so close, and you were thankful to have him there because in all your worried-sick glory, you could barely bring yourself to take care of Lucía, constantly spacing out.

You had called Cesar to ask if he had heard from his mano but he hadn’t. He told you that him, Ruby, Monse and Jamal had locked themselves inside in the Martinez house, the four of them wanting to be together until they knew where they were at with Cuchillos.

You called Mario too, since he had been the one to call Oscar to tell him about Cuchillos threatening their family, but he hadn’t heard back from Oscar either, and the man in question, of course, wasn’t picking up his phone.

You had never been as worried as you were now, and things didn’t get easier for you when Lucía kept asking you about her dad’s whereabouts, a question to which you couldn’t give an answer.

But you were lucky to have Ray there to help you out. He had tended to all the chores around the house throughout the day, all while taking care of his granddaughter and making sure you were okay.

He and Lucía had even cooked dinner together, a process during which she had cracked an egg over his head, something you knew Oscar would have found absolutely hilarious.

After dinner, Lucía went to bed on her own accord, exhausted after a long day of excessive playing with her Abuelo, leaving you and Ray to clean up in the kitchen.

No words were exchanged between the two of you as you worked together with the dishes. Ray washed them under the tap, scrubbing them free of food, and then passed them on to you for you to dry and put them back in their cabinet.

Suddenly, you felt a sharp jab of pain go through your lower abdomen, and after that, everything happened so quickly.

The glass that you were currently drying slipped out of your grasp as you reached out to grab on to the counter for support out of instinct, the glass shattering around your feet as it hit the floor.

Ray’s head whipped around in your direction and he wasted no time in dropping the plate he was currently washing, turning off the tap in one swift movement before rushing over to you.

“Watch your feet.” He instructed you worriedly, stepping over the big shards of glass to help you back away to a clean part of the floor. Once he was sure that you were safe, he let go of your arms. “I’ll go get the broom.”

Without waiting for a response, he turned around, stepped back over the glass and disappeared down the hallway, leaving you to support yourself by the kitchen island as another sharp jab of pain spread through your stomach.

This time, the pain was much more intense, causing you to rush your hand to your belly, and before you knew it, a warm feeling spread through your lower parts, wetness soaking the leggings you were wearing.

“No, no, no, no, no, not now. Please, not now.” Your eyes widened, panic settling in your chest as the pain hit you again. “Ray!” You yelled out, holding on to the counter with all your might as the pain got worse.

He came running in no time, meeting your eyes with a worried glance.

“Call Oscar again.” You instructed him at once, trying your hardest to focus your breathing.

“What’s wrong?” He asked as he approached you, but as his eyes flickered from your face, scrunched up in pain, to the floor where you were now standing in a puddle of fluids, he got his answer.

“Shit.” He cursed, walking over the glass without a single care in the world and rushing over to your side. “Okay, let’s sit you down, mija.”

With the new-found support, you were able to waddle over to the kitchen table where he helped you sit down on a chair, all while calling Oscar on his phone.

“He’s still not answering.” He stated the obvious and you squeezed your eyes shut, the pain becoming more intense and your heart picking up in speed.

“Take my phone, my code is Oscar’s birthday.” You told him, holding on to the backrest of the chair next to yours and motioning with your other arm to the coffee table where you had left your phone.

He wasted no time, rushing over and grabbing your phone as you opened your eyes again, and in that moment you just wished Oscar could have been there to see his father type in the digits of his birthday without as much as a doubt in his mind.

“Text Geny, tell her the baby’s coming. Then call 911.”

He didn’t protest even once, following your instructions while silently wondering how you could be so calm in such a stressful situation.

Not more than four minutes later, Geny and Cesar burst through the front door, right before the ambulance got there.

Geny went to look after Lucía and Cesar ran up to your side immediately while Ray kept trying to reach Oscar both through texts and calls, but to no avail.

The oldest Diaz was panicking, not at all sure what he was supposed to do, but Cesar was calm, giving you encouraging words and helping you control your breathing as you were helped into the ambulance.

This was, after all, not the first time he had supported you through this process.

While Geny stayed behind to look after Lucía, Cesar and Ray rode with you in the ambulance. Ray rode in the front with the driver while Cesar stayed in the back with you, holding your hand through the entire ride.

When you reached the hospital and you were pushed inside in a wheelchair, he still didn’t let go of your hand. Or maybe you were the one who wasn’t letting go, but either way, he didn’t complain once.

You were wheeled into an empty room and transferred onto a bed where two nurses helped you out of your clothes while Cesar and Ray waited outside.

Once you had received your epidural and were properly dressed and situated, with your legs in the holsters and holding a mask of laughing gas to your face, Cesar and Ray came inside and joined your side again.

They sat down in a chair each at either side of you, Cesar holding your free hand while Ray held on to the bag you had packed months earlier in preparation for this day.

The doctor stood by, scribbling down notes on a pad while awaiting you to be dilated enough to begin. He looked up at Ray over his glasses.

“What’s your relation to the patient, sir?” He asked him, his pen stilling on the notepad briefly.

“They’re my brother- and father-in-law.” You replied through controlled breaths before they got the chance to say anything, squeezing your eyes shut and clutching down on Cesar’s hand as another contraction hit you.

“And the father?” He asked, taking notes.

This time, Ray spoke up. “I’ve been trying to get to him but he’s not picking up.”

You let out a dry laugh through the pain, pushing your head back into the pillow and removing the mask from your face to breathe some fresh air.

“Of course he chose this day out of all the days to get caught up with some bullshit.” You panted out, letting out a sound of pain and tensing your entire body as another, much bigger contraction went through your body.

Beside you, Cesar cursed under his breath from having his hand basically crushed, while the doctor put the notepad away and moved down to your legs, checking under the cover the nurses had put over your legs and humming.

“We’ll have to start without him.” He looked up at you, pulling a chair toward him and sitting down, pulling on a fresh pair of gloves. “Do you want them to stay with you?”

You nodded furiously, putting the mask back over your face. “Yes.”

Cesar and Ray remained silent at your sides as the delivery was started. Cesar kept holding on to your hand and throughout the process, a nurse handed Ray a wet, cold rag to dab your sweaty forehead with.

The pain was excruciating but even though it had been four entire years since you gave birth to Lucía, the feeling was familiar, allowing you to handle it a lot better than you had back then in combination with the gas.

This time, the thing hindering you from being completely calm was the fact that Oscar couldn’t be reached and that you had no idea where he was, if he was okay, or if he was even alive.

For all you knew, he could be dead in a ditch somewhere and the mere thought of it brought tears to your eyes.

The doctor and nurse kept encouraging you, thinking that you were just crying from the pain, but Ray saw your sorrows for what they were, reaching out and holding your hand in his tightly once you abandoned the mask.

“He’ll be alright, mija.” He promised you, and you nodded your head while squeezing both his and Cesar’s hands as you gave another push.

And then, almost as if someone had heard your silent prayers for Oscar’s safe return, a nurse rushed inside, stopping in the doorway.

“A man just arrived, claiming he’s the father. He’s hurt, looking like he’s been beaten pretty bad, and acting aggressively so we need someone to come and identify him before we let him in.” She spoke in one breath, and Cesar was on his feet immediately, sending you a comforting smile.

“I’ll go.” He said, and the nurse nodded, leading him away.

But you had barely even registered her words, too caught up in your own head, giving all of the little concentration you had left after the drugs to the pushing.

It wasn’t until Oscar appeared in the doorway that you truly allowed yourself to relax, letting out a cry of relief.

“Oscar.” You cried, and he was at your side in no time, taking the seat Cesar had previously been occupying while the boy in question stayed in the doorway.

“I’m here, mi amor.” He told you, and you looked at him, letting out another cry when you caught sight of his bruised and bloody face. “You’re doing great, mami. Keep going.” He told you, gripping your hand with both of his.

As he kept giving you encouraging words, kissing your knuckles, Ray stood up and sneaked out of the room with Cesar, leaving the two of you alone.

The delivery lasted for another fifteen minutes, and then with one last push, a new cry broke through the air as your body fell limp on the bed.

Oscar left your side to cut the umbilical cord of your newborn baby, being the first one to hold it in his arms once the nurse had wrapped it in a blanket.

He looked down at the new life with a smile on his face, slowly walking over to your side again, sitting down and turning the bundle so that you got a clear view.

“It’s a girl.” He told you smugly, smirking at you, and you groaned playfully.

“Damn it.” You cursed, your head hitting the pillow behind you again, but you smiled and Oscar chuckled, leaning forward to press a kiss to your damp forehead.

With the help of one of his hands, you were able to scoot up into a sitting position on the bed, looking down at your newborn daughter’s pruny face from your seat.

When Lucía was born, she had been screaming the second she came out and not gone quiet for hours, but this baby was quiet, only whining slightly as she moved around in Oscar’s arms.

You smiled at the sight, silently holding your shaking arms out. You didn’t need to say anything, Oscar carefully handing the bundle over to you, and you instantly sniffled when you felt her in your arms, a fresh set of tears starting to prick your eyes.

He sat beside you, leaning his elbows on his knees and looking at you with a concentrated expression.

You were suddenly pulled back to reality, your eyes flickering away from your daughter’s perfect face and over to Oscar, your heart falling in your chest as you got your first proper look of his face.

Both of his eyes were purple and slightly swollen, small cuts littering his face and an even bigger cut on his neck. Worry filled your body as you noticed his drooping eyes and took note of the fact that the cut on his neck was still producing fresh blood.

“Oscar...” You whispered and his eyes instantly moved from the baby to you.

Before you got the chance to say anything else, however, there was a knock at the door.

Both of you turned your attention to the source of the sound, finding Ray standing there with the hospital bag slung over his shoulder, alongside the nurse who had come in and alerted you of Oscar’s arrival earlier.

“Sir, you’re bleeding.” She stated the obvious, taking the words right out of your mouth. “If you come with me, we’ll get you cleaned up.”

A glare instantly settled over his face, but when you reached your hand out to touch his hand, it melted right off. He turned to look at you and you nodded in encouragement. “We’ll be fine.”

Ray left the nurse’s side, walking into the room and coming over to Oscar, reaching out and squeezing his shoulder. “I’ll stay and look over them.” He promised.

Oscar sighed, turned back to you and gave you and the baby a kiss each, before silently walking after the nurse out of the room, leaving Ray to take his seat.

He dropped the bag next to the bed and sank into the chair. He looked at you questionably and before he could say anything, you smiled, answering. “It’s a girl.”

He smiled back lightly, peeking over the bundle of blankets.

“Do you want to hold her?” You asked, and he looked at you with a doubtful expression. But then he nodded, and carefully reached out to take her from your arms and into his own.

He looked down at her carefully, bouncing her in his arms lightly and pulling the blanket from out of her face, touching her nose.

When feeling his touch, she reached a small hand out and wrapped her even smaller fingers around one of his, causing him to smile up at you. “She likes me.”

You chuckled and nodded, leaning back on the bed in exhaustion. “Yeah.” You agreed, feeling your heart tug in your chest when he looked back at her and sniffled, bringing an arm up to wipe his eyes.

Oscar reappeared in the doorway then, the cut on his neck now covered by a thick bandage and the smaller ones on his face clean from dried blood.

Ray threw a look over his shoulder when hearing his approaching footsteps, turning back to you and carefully handing the baby back before standing up, meeting Oscar in the middle of the room.

Oscar threw a quick look at you, making sure you were both okay, and when getting a smile of confirmation, he turned back to his dad while you turned your attention to the baby, giving them as much privacy as you could considering the fact that you were still stuck in the same room.

“I’m glad you’re okay.” Ray was the one to break the silence between them. Oscar only nodded his head once, which urged Ray to continue. “I, uh… I found an apartment.”

Oscar scoffed, a glare crossing over his features. “You’re leaving again?”

“You’re leaving?” Came Cesar’s voice, now standing in the doorway with a small, white plastic bag clutched in his hand. His face was sad, eyes wide.

“No.” Ray looked over to him and quickly protested, shaking his head, and both Oscar and Cesar visibly relaxed. He turned back to Oscar. “It’s just down the street from you. Figured you won’t want me on the couch now that you’ve got a baby to take care of.”

He paused, eyes flickering down slightly, but then he made his move and put a hand on his shoulder, giving it a good squeeze. “You did good, mijo. I’m proud of you.”

Oscar’s face scrunched up with emotion, his eyes growing glassy, and before any of you could register it, they had wrapped their arms around each other in a tight embrace, Ray’s hands clapping his back in a fatherly manner while Oscar buried his face in his neck.

While they shared their moment, Cesar silently walked around them with a smile permanently splayed across his face, approaching you while raising the bag.

“I, uh, I wanted to bring you flowers but you know, the hospital cafeteria didn’t have much to offer so I bought candy bars instead.” He said nervously and your entire face lit up.

“You know I’d take chocolate over flowers any day.” You chuckled in relief at the thought of getting something to eat after the physically and mentally draining day, putting on a playful smirk and nodding to the baby. “I’ll trade you.”

Cesar’s nervous smile pulled into a much brighter one and he hurriedly took a seat at the edge of the bed, dumping the bag beside you and holding his arms out.

Handing him the baby, he looked down at her and then up at you again. “Do you have a name?” He asked and you parted your lips.

“Ariel.” Oscar spoke before you could answer, causing you to turn and glare at him as he joined your side again, Ray heading over for the chair at Cesar’s side.

“I thought we agreed on Isabel?” You asked, raising an eyebrow, and he gave you one of those annoyingly handsome smirks.

“No, you agreed. I didn’t.” He protested and you rolled your eyes.

“You could always mix them.” Cesar offered a solution, shrugging his shoulders while slowly rocking the sleeping baby in his arms.

You instantly shook your head, scrunching your nose up in disgust. “No, thank you.” You declined, begrudgingly. “I’d rather settle with Ariel.”

You sighed, laying back down and Oscar took your hand with a small chuckle. Five minutes later, Geny turned up with Lucía and her entire family, and not long after that, Monse and Jamal turned up with their parents, too.

That’s what you loved about the people in Freeridge. They knew when to give people space but they also knew exactly when you were supposed to be together.

You were like one giant family. It wasn’t perfect; rather, on the contrary, it was broken and pretty fucked up, but it was yours, and that was more than enough.

2K notes · View notes