look, in all my time on fo4 tumblr and on the fo4 subreddit where hatred runs rampant, ive still only seen two valid criticisms of the railroad as a faction. ever.

(im putting aside the whole entire slavery allegory for the purposes of this post)

these two criticisms are:

if you (yes, you. the player) fundamentally disagree with the notion that synths are sentient people, the organization makes no sense and is useless. i cant change your bedrock beliefs on what constitutes a person, so this criticism stands

the mind wipes might border on unethical. the idea is good and well-intentioned, but it kinda sucks in practice. synths can choose not to have the procedure, but the railroad's catastrophizing about what will happen if they dont feels coercive sometimes. i could probably be convinced otherwise, but i think this is a pretty good point

thats it. there are no more. im absolutely open to (and would love, actually) yall trying to change my mind but just know that if your criticisms are:

they're short-sighted; the organization will eventually dissolve because there will be no more synths left to help

they have no plan nor reason to help synths post-institute; the moment the institute explodes, so does the railroad

they're too narrow-minded; they should be helping people too, not just synths

by destroying the institute, they're stopping the production of synths; this nullifies their efforts in saving synths and is even, dare i say, hypocritical

their password being railroad is far too simple and the freedom trail is too easy to follow; theyre just asking for another switchboard

[insert member of the railroad, usually desdemona] is mean; the organization is full of assholes

then ur efforts will be wasted on me. all of these criticisms are bad <3

//CORRUPTED FILE OldWorld.txt PARTIALLY RETRIEVED. DISPLAYING RESTORED TEXT//

[...A world subsisting on the last sparks of a long dead star.]

[It will die soon. And what will we do then? What will happen, after the last ember dies?]

[...A music box would be nice. A lullaby, at the end of time... to remember us.]

i think one of my favorite deacon headcanons is that he only lies:

when the lie is so patently inconsequential that it doesnt even matter that he's lying (ie ricky on the bridge), or

when the lie is so obvious or the person he's lying to knows him so well that it's honestly more of a bit than a lie (like the synth thing. i just know he was gigglin in private waiting for sole to open that stupid note and call him on it).

almost nothing in the game indicates that he's actually a good liar when it matters. in fact, if he really was a good liar, it wouldn't be such common knowledge because no one would catch him in it. des immediately calls him on his lie when he and sole come back from the switchboard, he get flustered when you confront him in bunker hill, hell he barely chokes out a believable lie when he's trying to get clearance for the prydwen.

but because he maintains so insistently that hes such a liar, no one trusts him anyway. his reputation negates any necessity to actually lie, and if a liar knows anything, it's that the best lies are the ones you don't even have to sell.

i frequently forget that some of my favorite media is, like, objectively badly written bc i tend to completely explain away such flaws with headcanons. which i think my knee-jerk reaction to critique of said media is usually defensive: because ive already explained away their critique in-game.

hm? deacon railroad tries to be a character with dimension but ends up being more or less just another instance of deadwife manpain, you say? no! he is just soooo complex and nuanced and has so many feelings that even he himself doesnt fully understand, so how could he possibly communicate them to the player character?? and even if he was able, he wouldn't! he invites the sole survivor into the railroad for nothing more than personal/professional gain, thus has no intention of revealing his true self to them! but then once he gets close enough to them and starts trusting them enough to actually want to share, he can't! all he knows anymore is hiding from the people around him - so much so that he has truly begun to hide from himself!

......... what do you MEAN none of this is actually canon and is just what ive implied about his character to explain in-game WHY he feels so surface-level even after his final affinity conversation? to shield him from the very open and obvious fridging going on with barbara?? AND TO EXPLAIN WHY HE WONT SMOOCH ME????

SO WAS ANYBODY GONNA TELL ME THAT ARCADE GANNON IS VOICED BY NONE OTHER THAN FLYNN RYDER HIMSELF

OR WAS I JUST SUPPOSED TO FIND OUT THROUGH THIS BEST OF ARCADE POST MYSELF

every day i go on r/fallout and every day i see threads and threads of people hating on the railroad and using talking points that are explicitly addressed by the railroad members themselves in the game

and then i close reddit and i open my comfy tumblr dash ive filled with wonderful critical thinkers and suddenly i feel my shoulders relax and my jaw unclench

UH OH TIME TO GET SAPPY

(sorry this is two days late ive been very lacking on spoons BUT) this has truly been one of my favorite years ever.

i started this blog because i had so much love for deacon railroad rattling around in here and i didnt know how to contain it. i'd finally finished atom bomb baby after months of work and i was desperate to share it and get other deacon girlies' opinions on how i did, but after i made this blog, i still chickened out of posting it for almost two weeks. i lurked and scrolled until i finally got the courage... and the rest is history. i thought my playlist was going to be My Only Thing. i would post it and never be heard from again.

extremely loud incorrect buzzer

i have met so many incredible, creative, inspiring, wonderful people this past year that i truly can no longer imagine my life without. yall have inspired me to write hundreds of thousands of words, make my darling ocs, get a damn fo4 tattoo, break out of my shell, and interact with more people than i ever couldve imagined. mutuals ur some of my favorite people in the world and i mean that so sincerely. hell even if we're not mutuals and ur reading this im so thankful you've stuck around. thank yall for always tagging me in your picrew/oc/writing tag games, i love seeing everything yall have created so so much. i promise i will always be insane in ur tags so long as i live and breathe 🫡

particularly i wanna mention @typecastwritesssss, @spaceratprodigy, @mae-peachie, and @happyhappysparkle for constantly being so kind to and supportive of me. yall are so talented and inspirational and thoughtful and aaaaaaaa im just so thankful for yalls influence on my life <3 <3

ok thats all!!!! happy late birthday oldworldwidgets!!!!!!!!

anyone got fanart of deacon railroad dying in a glue trap i need it to soothe my soul

my worst fo4 trait is finishing the confidence man quest right when i get to diamond city on every new save and then immediately putting in console commands to make travis shy and nervous again. cant say this often but i gotta hand it to big beth for awkward travis. i love that funky little guy.

honesty hour

sometimes i think about "she would've liked this" and actual real tears well up in my eyes. like i have to take a minute to sit down and collect myself or truly i will weep

i am singlehandedly keeping the fallout wiki in business considering the amount of time i have deacon's dialogue tab open on my computer + the amount of ads they run on it

deacon, even if he wasnt sworn to secrecy and bound under a codename, would never reveal or go by his last name anyway because it was barbara's too.

that is all

i wanted to participate in falloutober and OC-tober so BAD but i just have to much to DO in the REAL WORLD that if i do A SINGLE THING for fun i cant even enjoy it bc my responsibilities just Loom. theyre inescapabe. catch me posting falloutober prompts in goddamn december just bc i barely even have time to breathe rn let alone write for fun. fallout....cember

i think im gonna start integrating a lil more posting about other fallouts/more fo4 outside of deacon along with my usual stuff :3 i feel like i care too much about making this blog Exclusively Deacon and its making it less fun to be around so!!! anyway!!

i hope yall also like the other fallouts + oc content because OH BOY do i have some little guys running around in here

no YOU'RE neglecting your deacon longfic so u can make a brand new oc for fo76 so u can play with ur friends and romance beckett. IM sitting here diligently typing about the original haunted sunglasses man and his deadwife manpain. what a wild accusation smh

what about the word headcanon is so difficult to understand. it's all right there man. the canon that exists in ur head. perhaps even the canon that exists on your blog! in your art! in your friend group!

it is not, however, the canon that exists in my head!

if i see one more post that just. states a headcanon as a fact (especially a harmful one. eyes emoji at half of fo4 tumblr) OR those "and theres nothing u can do about it" posts about a headcanon im unfortunately gonna have to break out the pipe bombs :/