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dnfao3tags · 1 year

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Masterlist - Mario Anon (mpreg)

what sort of dnf fic recs blog would i be if i didn't make a mario anon reclist. this is a list of all their fics (which i can find at least).

hello mario anon if you are reading this. im kind of putting you on blast on the jumbotron rn. dorry

— Dream has loads of clout and he gets some non famous idiot pregnant by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 17k)

Apparently famous x non famous is far more beloved than I realised

— Dream and George VS Infertility (DNF mpreg but the m pregging takes a while) by Anonymous (mature | comp. | 28k)

Dnf mpreg and this time there are fertility issues.

— Dream gets George pregnant: pre-visa edition by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 32k)

What it says on the tin

Part 1 of pre-visa/post-visa dnf mpreg by mario anon (idk how to do series titles tbh)

— The Mario Apple DNF Mpreg Crossover Event by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 18k)

George is pregnant, but he has AMNESIA!

note: mario anon and apple anon collab !

— dnf mpreg kinkfic and I will try to make it kinkier than last time because we all know that got too fluffy by Anonymous (expl. | comp. | 21k)

Democratically elected by the Mario Anon Comment Section (as of the time I started writing this)

Part 1 of mario anon kinkfic part 1 and 2

— George gets pregnant but it's more dramatic than usual by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 21k)

i am writing all the time

— george and patches being pregnant at the same time by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 1k)

i cannot write a long fic rn but i CAN do 3 or 4 short scenes of this

— The DNF Mpreg Holiday Special by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 7k)

Dnf mpreg but make it christmas

— Dnf mpreg but sapnap is the main character by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 7k)

when i asked for ideas on my last fic one rlly stuck out to me and i had to write it immediately

— Ordinary Mario Anon Fic by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 3k)

I'm writing DNF mpreg. everything is exactly the same. nothing is different. it is all very normal

— George Agrees To Do YouTube Boxing, You Won't BELIEVE What Happens Next (NOT CLICKBAIT!!) by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 2k)

GNF says yes to boxing but finds out he has had his m pregged by dream

— Dream Steps Up (he is a stepdad) by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 26k)

dream becomes a stepdad to one kid and then george makes him another

— dnf mpreg: pov everyone except dnf by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 19k)

i am EXPERIMENTING

— dnf have a baby together "platonically" by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 28k)

Just guys being pals (bro got homie pregnant and they're keeping it but they're totally not dating)

— Two half finished works and an apology by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 13k)

im literally STruggling

— Uh oh George is pregnant by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 22k)

Same stuff as usual

— Dream and George and a Baby (and also Sapnap is there too) (sometimes) by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 22k)

The usuals

— Dream Knocks George Up by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 17k)

so tired but i can't stop

— mpreg fic but this time its at least 5% kinky by Anonymous (mature | comp. | 17k)

George: horny and pregnant edition BUT i forgot it was supposed to b kinky and it just gets gradually less and less horny and then its just a bunch of fluff instead.

— generic mpreg title by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 14k)

same plot as all the other ones idk

Part 1 of generic mpreg

— more dnf mpreg no one asked for by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 17k)

George has his m pregged by Dream.

— George is pregnant *not clickbait* by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 10k)

Fuck! *m's your preg* I wish this was crack but it's not.

Part 1 of whats wrong with me

— Mpreg (derogatory) but also sometimes its a chatfic not really though by Anonymous (teen | comp. | 9k)

Karl dnf is real :O congratulations!! ... dream dick? George no more. no more please. Quackity HE SENT ME A DICK PIC Karl WhaT WHAT WHAT WHAT Dream BY ACCIDENT Bad okay this is my cue to leave Sapnap DREAM WHY WOULD U DO THAT

Part 1 of how do i get rid of dnf. help

#ok i think i gotem all #i am literally heavily //assuming// that these r all mario anon #if anyone would like to correct me #feel free #i went through the entire mpreg tag #let's a go !#dnf #dreamnotfound #mario anon #mpreg #mario anon used to be a guilty pleasure #but now im loud and proud #dnfao3tags recs #if u want this taken down mario anon #then .#idk dm me or smt

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pesterloglog · 2 months

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Dave Strider, Karkat Vantas

Page 291-293

DAVE: i dunno who the flower is in this case

DAVE: shit what if im the flower

KARKAT: SO

KARKAT: DAVE

DAVE: no hold up that makes no fuckin sense i gotta rewind back to the beginning

KARKAT: ARE YOU GONNA KEEP MUMBLING TO YOURSELF OR CAN--

DAVE: oh shit sorry what

DAVE: i was just thinking through some really convoluted metaphorical horseshit

KARKAT: YEAH THAT WAS PRETTY FUCKING EVIDENT.

DAVE: my b bro

DAVE: what were you saying

KARKAT: I WAS SAYING I THOUGHT WE MIGHT GO, I DUNNO, ANYWHERE ELSE ON THE ENTIRE SHIP WHILE THE CLOTHES WERE WASHING.

KARKAT: SEEING AS THIS DECREPIT MACHINE WE WERE SO BLESSEDLY PROVIDED WITH MAKES A WHIRRING SOUND SO PANCHAFINGLY ARHYTHMIC THAT IT THREATENS TO ERADICATE THE ENTIRE CONCEPT OF TEMPO FROM THE UNIVERSE.

KARKAT: AND YET SOMEHOW BASICALLY ALL THAT HAS HAPPENED SINCE WE STARTED THE LOAD IS THAT YOU’VE BEEN USING IT AS A FUCKED UP BEAT TO WHISPER TO YOURSELF ABOUT FLOWERS TO.

KARKAT: AT THIS POINT I'M EITHER GOING TO NEED YOU TO SPEAK UP OR FOLLOW ME THE FUCK ON OUT OF HERE, BECAUSE THIS IS EXCRUCIATING.

DAVE: ok fine ill do the first one

KARKAT: GREAT. TURN UP THE FLOWER TALK VOLUME.

DAVE: so uh

DAVE: kanaya was telling me this kids story the other day about this dude who didnt cherish a flower enough until it peaced out to do flower stuff idk its not pertinent to the story

DAVE: except the flower was a person

DAVE: because it was a metaphor

KARKAT: YEAH LIKE YOU SAID,

DAVE: really convoluted metaphorical horseshit

KARKAT: REALLY CONVOLUTED METAPHORICAL HORSESHIT.

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: anyway what goes down in the story is that once the flower lady is out of the picture

DAVE: the main character goes around making all these connections between her and everything else in the universe until every damn thing feels like a symbol for how much he fucked up and how much he will never see her again

KARKAT: THIS SEEMS PRETTY FUCKING INTENSE FOR A KID'S STORY

DAVE: yea thats pretty much what i said

DAVE: but i guess its not so much what the story was technically textually about but more like the version of it kanaya internalized and then told me when we were talkin about how she misses rose

DAVE: so like now im taking the story she told me she was projecting her feelings onto and projecting my feelings on top of that

DAVE: this is just one big game of emotional projection telephone so feel free to go paraphrase it to roxy later and make it about whatever fuckin thing youre currently missing

KARKAT: YOUR ABILITY TO GET TO THE POINT

DAVE: gotem

DAVE: anyway you’re not gonna have to miss that skill of mine for long

DAVE: get ready for this shit because i am about to slap you with the point so hard youll fall ass first into the washer

DAVE: just scrambling around in there getting all sudsy

DAVE: but your brain is gonna be so blasted from the mindfreak of a point im about to make that there wont be anything left to clean

DAVE: are you ready

DAVE: karkat you havent made any kind of comment about how youre ready in a few seconds so

KARKAT: YEAH DAVE DROP THIS FUCKING BOMB ON ME.

DAVE: ok thanks

DAVE: so its genuinely cool that kanaya can go around creating meaning that may or may not be actually present in every little thing

DAVE: connecting every feeling she has to the idea of her wife existing out there

DAVE: so i told her she should keep that shit up

DAVE: but im having the opposite issue where im struggling to find anything to be that kind of tether because every single thing i could possibly consider about what it is were doing just reminds me of yet another thing to be afraid about

DAVE: so if you were looking for a more concentrated point

DAVE: the real point thats that point simmered in its own juices into a perfect point reduction

DAVE: here it is

DAVE: everything fuckin sucks huge cosmic donkey sack and im terrified

KARKAT: OK, SO I FEEL LIKE YOU SKIPPED A COUPLE NECESSARY STEPS IN YOUR POINT CLARIFICATION PROCESS.

KARKAT: I’M GOING TO RESIST THE URGE TO CONTINUE YOUR REDUCTION METAPHOR EVEN THOUGH I HAVE SOME INARGUABLY GOOD SHIT LINED UP FOR IT BECAUSE I’M AFRAID OF US GETTING TOO FAR OFF TRACK, HERE.

DAVE: ok but were you going with sweet or savory please give me that much at least

KARKAT: YEAH IT WAS GOING TO BE SUNDAE-BASED.

DAVE: nice

KARKAT: YEAH.

KARKAT: DO YOU WANNA WATCH MORE GBBO AFTER THIS?

DAVE: absolutely

KARKAT: GREAT. ANYWAY, LIKE I WAS SAYING, FOR THE LOVE OF SWEET HUMAN CHRIST, PLEASE BACK UP TO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU’RE ACTUALLY SCARED OF.

KARKAT: ALSO COME HERE, IDIOT.

DAVE: ok yeah this is a better position to unleash all my inner fears n anxieties from

DAVE: so uh

DAVE: like i said i talked to kan about it some

DAVE: and its not like weve not talked about it either but i dunno

DAVE: man its like i cant even start genuinely thinking about how afraid i actually am for rose and john without my brain flippin its wad and whiting out

DAVE: like haha fuck i hope theyre ok

DAVE: now i better make a fuckin joke before i succumb to the gaping mouth of despair waiting for me to fall in it as soon as i look down and acknowledge that its there ogling how juicy my ass looks as it trembles with terror

DAVE: and then if i think about either of them then its only a matter of time til i have to think about dirk too

DAVE: its an if you give a mouse a cookie situation but instead of more snacks its just another layer of fear about my loved ones

DAVE: and with dirk its

DAVE: whew

DAVE: i guess im just fucked up about how to worry about dirk and be angry at him at the same time

DAVE: because if i get as unholy pissed at him as i sometimes wanna be i also gotta admit to myself that maybe i coulda done something different there

DAVE: like if wed kept up better maybe there woulda been a point along the line where i could have said the right thing somehow and hed idk

DAVE: not stolen rose away on some nightmare family trip

DAVE: forcing us to accept the fact that hes our enemy now and chase after him for an unreasonably indeterminate number of years

DAVE: also like

DAVE: and this by the way adds a whole other layer of guilt on there that i dont really know how to fuckin reckon with but

DAVE: even with all the shit hes pulled and the fact that we are more or less heading toward having to take him down

DAVE: whatever that is gonna mean and whether or not he planned it like that

DAVE: i just

DAVE: me and him had come so far with each other and it was really cool for a while to have him and i

DAVE: ugh

DAVE: i dont WANT to hate him

KARKAT: IS THAT ALL? I’M POISED ON THE PRECIPICE OF REASSURANCE WITH MY COUNTER-RANT LOCKED AND LOADED BUT IT FEELS LIKE YOU’VE GOT MORE SHIT YOU’RE HOLDING BACK ON.

DAVE: yeah i got another thing

KARKAT: WELL THEN QUIT FUCKING PICKING AT THE SEAM ON MY SHORTS AND SPIT IT OUT. THEY'RE BARELY HANGING ON TO THE DEFINITION OF "SHORTS" AS IT IS.

DAVE: ok fuck its just

DAVE: ...

DAVE: the part i mentioned before about how we really have no goddamn clue how long this trip is even gonna take

DAVE: i cant help but feel like its barely getting revved up

DAVE: and for me and roxy and jade and callie and kan thats normal shit at best and boring at worst but we all have our immortality to thank for that

DAVE: we can just dick around in space for near-eternity waiting to catch up to our friends who may or may not be our enemies now and itll be fine

DAVE: i mean no itll be categorically miserable

DAVE: but well survive it

KARKAT: HOLD THE FUCK ON.

DAVE: but you

KARKAT: DAVE.

DAVE: no lemme say this

DAVE: we dont talk about it much and i got shit to say about it

DAVE: its not like i never thought about how youre mortal before but i just thought wed be able to figure it out before it mattered

DAVE: come up with some kind of plan

DAVE: i was just distracted being happy with you i fucking guess and so i didnt think up a way to fix it

DAVE: and now thanks to dirk we have to work it out right the fuck now

DAVE: because i cant spend this trip just sitting around watching you get old and die

#homestuck #homestuck^2 #dave strider #karkat vantas #homestuck^2 act 1 #page 291 #page 292 #page 293

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koopakaper · 11 months

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mudae is fucked up bro what the fuck has it done to me

random person rolling THE SPOT at 3 AM while I’m outside smoking

I’m gonna expose the whole system

If you don’t know how the game works, basically you can roll random characters that you can claim for yourself. You can roll 10 an hour, but can only claim once every 3 hours or so. I think that they purposefully drip feed you characters to get you addicted. There’s an algorithm. It tracks what characters are popular, and what characters it knows you like. It knows when you use the bot so it purposefully rolls characters it thinks you want based on your pattern and gives it to you like a fish goes for bait or something analogyesque

I’m checking my disablelist which lets you disable certain groups of characters with a low limit. You can optimally disable a perfect amount of characters to get the best odds at rolling a wish (A character that gets pinged if rolled and can “boost the chance” of it rolling (probably still an active detriment to you rolling because of course the algorithm doesn’t actually want you to get a like 250% bonus chance when you get max upgrades to actually be a pure random roll you’d get them all the time if they were TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY PERCENT MORE LIKELY TO HAPPEN.))

I try to disable this random company’s roster but it doesn’t work because I forgor

disabling the most fucking random ass shit I could find with higher than average wg (Waifu Game (It’s cringe because this bot was made by weebs but whatever). Category where you only roll women from games. The alternatives being Husbando (fuck whoever came up with ‘husbando’) Game (hg), but also Waifu Animanga (wa) (Everything that’s not game) and husbando (seriously Fuck that guy) Animanga (ha). I was on wg because I basically completed my ha wishlist which left me with the most random characters. I was on ha for like a YEAR AND A HALF getting all the characters I wanted it took soooo long, and since ha is most of the characters I want anyway (with other people rolling wa so I can get those characters too) I basically mained that category and decided to go on break for new characters to get added (happens once in a blue moon because the mods are lazy as fuck and take like 6 weeks to sort through something that could be done in a Google Form. (jk idc about the time)) so I was about to go back to the years long struggle of completing ha

(The characters on there with the check mark are characters I was trying to get keys with. Keys are just extra rewards that give you bonus, sometimes helpful stuff if you roll a character you already own. Of course owning characters that would give high reward makes them NEVER roll so you get a bunch of shit rewards from the lowest worth card in your “harem” (more cringe).)

(The ones with nothing next to them are ones I haven’t got yet. Of course having them on here probably decreases their chance. Well no. It does help, but the point is, is that before the boost, the % chance is in the negatives. Putting it at a very low chance which sucks.)

(And the one with the X next to it is the reason I swapped to wg in the first place. I wanted to set up my perfect disablelist and wishlist to get Meow Skulls but... I lost to my literal arch nemesis who took my wish (THEY ROLLED THE SPOT)

Anyway

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ The Meow Skulls in question (from Fortnite)

WHAT THE FUCK THE GIF SPEEDS UP I THOUGHT I WAS GOING CRAZY BUT NO THE GIF GETS EXPONENTIALLY FASTER FOR SOME REASON WHY DOES IT DO THAT

I try to swap back to my other disablelist but I can’t remember the command

The DM I got

Mudae commands aren’t done with ! you fucking IDIOT gotem qs2 my balls lol

I finally figure out how to save my currect wishlists and disablelists so I can come back to wg later

I try to clear my wishlists and disablelists to get a blank slate by loading an empty slot but that’s NOT HOW IT WORKS IDIOT

I finally manage to find the commands

I clear it all out

I’m checking my work. Finally doing what I was trying to do. But that’s where I fucked up also because why the fuck would I ever think to do this

I became self aware quickly

I remembered what I was actually trying to do

my rolls:

random thing no one cares about

random shit no one cares about

random shit one cares about

Awesome Face (had to claim that lol epic)

Random shit no one cares about

Eduardo. Nice key and I got some good kakera (the currency, commonly known as kak)

it actually kinda sucked (white ones usually give more but because the white one breaks down into multiple, you essentially get multiple kak per kak

The colors are as follows:

Purple: like 100 kak

Blue: like 150-200

Light Blue: 250-350

Yellow: 400-650

Orange: 700- 950

Red: 1050-1300

White: starts out as 3, sometimes 4 random kak crystals, upgrades to 5, sometimes 6 kak crystals (and beyond?).

Just estimates, idk the exact number

The worst roll I could get from the white is 5 purples, but blue are most common, and are 2nd worst. So basically I got 4 2nd worsts and one 3rd worst

There’s also RAINBOW kak which gives like 3.5k per grab but it’s super rare.

I’ve actually gotten it most out of everyone in my server, being FIVE

Random shit no one cares about

Cool, another key

Random shit no one cares about

And fucking Earle Schmerle

Wait hold on let me explain

Everytime you claim a character, a message gets sent

You can customize this message.

By default it’s like “username has married charname”

But everyone moved it away from being romantic in that way, so I thought “Wouldn’t it be funny if I did the exact opposite?” and that has been my claim message to this day, which has led to some interesting screenshots

So yeah I rolled shit all

Thank Mudae algorithm

so yeah Mudae is a gambling addiction and I genuinely think it drains my mental health i hope you enjoy my journey

#mudae #the spot #spiderverse #conspiracy #the spot is sexy #wtf who tagged that you're weird #fortnite #meow skulls #i want to have sex with the spot from spiderman into the spiderverse #homestuck 2

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bladekindeyewear · 4 years

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HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-08-23

More homestuuuuuck

I’m a little tired today so I don’t expect much intelligent analysis out of myself, but if anything classpecty happens I doubt I’ll be able to help myself regardless.

oh, always

(EDITS: added note on horn colors, link to ask on potential Blood powers reference)

> CHAPTER 12. Really Convoluted Metaphorical Horseshit

cuuute

In the bowels of a different ship, at a moment in time that is not pinpointable in either direction from the previous interaction, another Dave raps quietly to himself.

another dave raps quietly to himself. i am glad that phrase exists it brings me joy

(LATER EDIT: A friend on Discord pointed out that throughout this entire update, Karkat's horns are #FF0000 red. They were normal candy-corn colors in previous glimpses at the ship crew, though they used a dark single-color shortcut typical of old Homestuck at one point... but THIS time it stays STARK red even when we zoom in close later. Is this just artistic liberty? Did Karkat color his horns for fashion? Does this happen to red-bloods like the Sufferer after a certain age? Just how much time has actually passed, here? We might have to wait for the commentary for this one.)

KARKAT: I WAS SAYING I THOUGHT WE MIGHT GO, I DUNNO, ANYWHERE ELSE ON THE ENTIRE SHIP WHILE THE CLOTHES WERE WASHING. KARKAT: SEEING AS THIS DECREPIT MACHINE WE WERE SO BLESSEDLY PROVIDED WITH MAKES A WHIRRING SOUND SO PANCHAFINGLY ARHYTHMIC THAT IT THREATENS TO ERADICATE THE ENTIRE CONCEPT OF TEMPO FROM THE UNIVERSE.

Karkat really has chilled out hasnt he? like this is surprisingly level for him, and that fact is hilarious.

KARKAT: AND YET SOMEHOW BASICALLY ALL THAT HAS HAPPENED SINCE WE STARTED THE LOAD IS THAT YOU’VE BEEN USING IT AS A FUCKED UP BEAT TO WHISPER TO YOURSELF ABOUT FLOWERS TO.

oh gosh that’s why he’s rapping

> ==>

DAVE: kanaya was telling me this kids story the other day about this dude who didnt cherish a flower enough until it peaced out to do flower stuff idk its not pertinent to the story DAVE: except the flower was a person DAVE: because it was a metaphor

Oh right, coming back to the Little Prince stuff I was too lazy to metaphor-deep-dive into, and literally asking the same questions we were asking about who the Little Prince’s story applies to mapped here if anyone at all, like Dirk and such, or what biases were in the retelling of it and the way Kanaya phrased it. So now we’re practically mocking it by deep diving it here, hence the last page’s “DAVE: i was just thinking through some really convoluted metaphorical horseshit”, which means we’re both about to further explore AND shit all over the existence of this story metaphor until it doesn’t mean anything and most of the meaning we drew from it earlier is made a joke~

well, not “we”, cause I was too lazy, so... y’all

DAVE: anyway what goes down in the story is that once the flower lady is out of the picture DAVE: the main character goes around making all these connections between her and everything else in the universe until every damn thing feels like a symbol for how much he fucked up and how much he will never see her again KARKAT: THIS SEEMS PRETTY FUCKING INTENSE FOR A KID'S STORY DAVE: yea thats pretty much what i said

Oh holy shit. That’s yet another way to put it. Are we doing a whole moral takedown of the Light aspect today? cause it sounds like we’re taking a dump on the Light aspect and RoboRose getting too obsessed and immersed in it, which would be excellent

DAVE: but i guess its not so much what the story was technically textually about but more like the version of it kanaya internalized and then told me when we were talkin about how she misses rose

exactly

DAVE: so like now im taking the story she told me she was projecting her feelings onto and projecting my feelings on top of that

yes absolutely, you just rephrased it a different way with that exact same bias

DAVE: this is just one big game of emotional projection telephone so feel free to go paraphrase it to roxy later and make it about whatever fuckin thing youre currently missing

perfect. i need an emoji for that Italian thing for when you pinch your thumb and forefinger together and kiss it

ah this’ll do:

its like the expression “choice” but in nonverbal form

[...] whatever fuckin thing youre currently missing KARKAT: YOUR ABILITY TO GET TO THE POINT DAVE: gotem DAVE: anyway you’re not gonna have to miss that skill of mine for long DAVE: get ready for this shit because i am about to slap you with the point so hard youll fall ass first into the washer DAVE: just scrambling around in there getting all sudsy DAVE: but your brain is gonna be so blasted from the mindfreak of a point im about to make that there wont be anything left to clean

Anytime dave is told to get to the point he is contractually obligated to spend at least 20 seconds talking about how he’ll get to the point in a way that is not getting to the point

DAVE: so its genuinely cool that kanaya can go around creating meaning that may or may not be actually present in every little thing DAVE: connecting every feeling she has to the idea of her wife existing out there DAVE: so i told her she should keep that shit up DAVE: but im having the opposite issue where im struggling to find anything to be that kind of tether because every single thing i could possibly consider about what it is were doing just reminds me of yet another thing to be afraid about

Great examples of Light being good and bad! Attaching strands of connective meaning to everything. --though, in Dave’s case AND Kanaya’s case you could argue it’s both bad in terms of effects. That it’s great for Kanaya to care, but that she should be able to divest herself and live on her own terms without idealizing Rose literally everywhere she looks, personal growth which would be useful in helping bring Rose back to her in the first place. The struggle they’re looking forward to is largely philosophical, not just physical, and until Rosebot acknowledges that she was wrong it’s not over.

DAVE: everything fuckin sucks huge cosmic donkey sack and im terrified KARKAT: OK, SO I FEEL LIKE YOU SKIPPED A COUPLE NECESSARY STEPS IN YOUR POINT CLARIFICATION PROCESS.

Pretty sure Dave was on the same page as most Epilogue and start-of-HS2 readers. This situation is pretty bleak to dump our heroes into, no matter how much we believe will be resolved in the long run.

DAVE: ok but were you going with sweet or savory please give me that much at least KARKAT: YEAH IT WAS GOING TO BE SUNDAE-BASED. DAVE: nice KARKAT: YEAH. KARKAT: DO YOU WANNA WATCH MORE GBBO AFTER THIS? DAVE: absolutely

--ah, Great British Bake-Off, can’t say I’ve indulged

do they still have that?? did they save it from old Earth? or did they go where unflooded Britain used to be and say hey, new show reboot

KARKAT: GREAT. ANYWAY, LIKE I WAS SAYING, FOR THE LOVE OF SWEET HUMAN CHRIST, PLEASE BACK UP TO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU’RE ACTUALLY SCARED OF. KARKAT: ALSO COME HERE, IDIOT.

That last line is like, exactly as fucking sweet and awesome as we imagined their relationship to be. :)

> ==>

OH MY GOD THAT’S ADORABLE

DAVE: ok yeah this is a better position to unleash all my inner fears n anxieties from

indisputably.

DAVE: those times its like my mouth was saying words about the situation wherein our friends are AWOL and maybe dead but my brain wasnt fully letting me experience the emotion that goes along with them DAVE: man its like i cant even start genuinely thinking about how afraid i actually am for rose and john without my brain flippin its wad and whiting out DAVE: like haha fuck i hope theyre ok DAVE: now i better make a fuckin joke before i succumb to the gaping mouth of despair waiting for me to fall in it as soon as i look down and acknowledge that its there ogling how juicy my ass looks as it trembles with terror

I really hope that the writers of HS2 know full well that this feeling? the one Dave is describing here? is what many of us who got way overinvested in the well-being of Homestuck’s surviving characters felt reading the Epilogues and Homestuck^2. So I really hope they’re working through it in a way that will result in a preponderance of GOOD THINGS happening and hope-filled situations. Cause that “can’t even think about X” feeling is too familiar, and if they understand it as well as it LOOKS like they’re getting to, I’d really like them to give us a helping hand healing.

I think that’s what they’re going for? Seems hopeful for me to think so, but they HAVE been doing better as HS2 has been going forward, from an emotional standpoint anyway; definitely better than the Epilogues. And I’ve worked through some of that stuff with the help of that, because it’s MUCH easier nowadays to think about Homestuck without my gut clenching.

DAVE: i guess im just fucked up about how to worry about dirk and be angry at him at the same time DAVE: because if i get as unholy pissed at him as i sometimes wanna be i also gotta admit to myself that maybe i coulda done something different there

Mhmm, Karkat’s potentially a pretty good person to speak with here since he’s done so much work trying not to feel responsible for everything that’s ever gone wrong.

DAVE: also like DAVE: and this by the way adds a whole other layer of guilt on there that i dont really know how to fuckin reckon with but DAVE: even with all the shit hes pulled and the fact that we are more or less heading toward having to take him down DAVE: whatever that is gonna mean and whether or not he planned it like that DAVE: i just DAVE: me and him had come so far with each other and it was really cool for a while to have him and i DAVE: ugh DAVE: i dont WANT to hate him

Yeah, Dirk and Jane’s heel-turns were really shitty for anyone who was a fan of them in the fanbase, as well.

KARKAT: WELL THEN QUIT FUCKING PICKING AT THE SEAM ON MY SHORTS AND SPIT IT OUT. THEY'RE BARELY HANGING ON TO THE DEFINITION OF "SHORTS" AS IT IS.

That is an adorably real boyfriend-laying-in-boyfriend’s-lap thing to do

DAVE: the part i mentioned before about how we really have no goddamn clue how long this trip is even gonna take DAVE: i cant help but feel like its barely getting revved up DAVE: and for me and roxy and jade and callie and kan thats normal shit at best and boring at worst but we all have our immortality to thank for that DAVE: we can just dick around in space for near-eternity waiting to catch up to our friends who may or may not be our enemies now and itll be fine DAVE: i mean no itll be categorically miserable DAVE: but well survive it KARKAT: HOLD THE FUCK ON. DAVE: but you KARKAT: DAVE. DAVE: no lemme say this

Oh god damnit. Karkat’s limited lifespan. As if we hadn’t ALREADY covered a nauseatingly extensive gamut of disheartening topics of conversation. We really have to confront every shred of misery in their past, present and future one after the other after the other in the Epilogues and HS2, don’t we? >:(

I guess it had to be discussed, though.

DAVE: we dont talk about it much and i got shit to say about it DAVE: its not like i never thought about how youre mortal before but i just thought wed be able to figure it out before it mattered DAVE: come up with some kind of plan DAVE: i was just distracted being happy with you i fucking guess and so i didnt think up a way to fix it DAVE: and now thanks to dirk we have to work it out right the fuck now DAVE: because i cant spend this trip just sitting around watching you get old and die

Jesus. I mean, WE know(?) that it’s not gonna be THAT many years, but THEY don’t know that.

Unless it really IS going to be that many years and HS2 is going to shamelessly take a fucking sledgehammer to our feelings for no goddamn good reason. Which it won’t! Right??? >:T

> ==>

Dishwasher ding

> Dave: Grapple with the clean, soggy consequences of the passage of time.

Hey, don’t make it a metaphor here. --though, fuck. I suppose we are dealing with everyones dirty laundry. God damnit. SURE, deal with it all story but then GET IT OUT OF THE WAY AND PUT SOME SERIOUS FUN AND LAUGHS IN HERE so we don’t feel like we’re wading through an entire garbage dump!!! *click*

Karkat’s eyebrows-only mouthless frown is really cute.

> ==>

okay Karkat explain the nope you’re lodging

> ==>

*put*

> ==>

*foot*

> ==>

DAVE: ok go on

I mean I at least appreciate the time investment in adorable boyfriends. That’s definitely something of SOME good value they’re giving us in exchange for this misery

> ==>

That Karkat image makes me wanna do that red-shaky-gif-thing with it

KARKAT: IT'S NOT LIKE I'M NEW TO THE PARTICULAR MOOBEAST WRANGLING EVENT OF SOMEONE I PREVIOUSLY LOVED BRUTALLY TURNING ON ME AND LEAVING ME TO TRY AND CRAM MY FEELINGS ABOUT THE SITUATION BACK TOGETHER ALL ON MY OWN.

True

KARKAT: HE DID THAT ON HIS OWN. AND WE MADE THE CHOICE TO GO AFTER HIM ON OUR OWN.

Yes, and you’ll possibly convince him more of that over time, though not in this short conversation

KARKAT: I WAS FOLLOWING YOUR LITTLE TRAIL OF COOKIE CRUMB FEARS UNTIL IT LEAD TO THE BIG SNACK FINALE OF WORRY ABOUT MY FRAGILE MORTAL MEATSACK. KARKAT: IF I HAVE SOMEHOW NOT BEEN CLEAR ABOUT THIS WITH YOU YET, LET ME GO AHEAD AND RECTIFY THE SITUATION RIGHT THE FUCK NOW. KARKAT: HANGING OUT WITH YOU ON THIS LONG TRIP TO WHO THE SHITTING FUCK KNOWS WHERE IS QUITE LITERALLY THE HAPPIEST I HAVE EVER BEEN IN MY ENTIRE MEAGER EXISTENCE. KARKAT: I'M SO ABSOLUTELY BLISSED THE FUCK OUT OF MY MIND TO BE ABLE TO LOOK AT YOUR STUPID IMMORTALLY SMOOTH HUMAN FACE SKIN EVERY DAY AND NOT HAVE A COMPLEX ABOUT IT.

D’AWWW

And with that darkly angry expression too, that’s PERFECT

I mean it’s true. What exactly would they be doing DIFFERENTLY on Earth C other than enjoying each other like this? It’s pretty fucking great.

...hm. Isn’t this journey-not-the-destination stuff pretty Breathy? Karkat’s proving more balanced by the moment.

KARKAT: AND I'LL BE STRAIGHT WITH YOU. IT'S NOT LIKE I HAVEN'T BEEN EXPERIENCING SOME COMPLICATED GUILT, MYSELF. KARKAT: THE FACT THAT I'M HAVING THE TIME OF MY LIFE JUST FUCKING CHILLAXING AND BEING IN LOVE IN SPACE IS A CLEARLY INCONGRUOUS WITH THE REASON I'M ACTUALLY HERE CHILLAXING TO BEGIN WITH, AND I'M NOT LETTING MYSELF FORGET THAT, EITHER.

Pff. He feels guilty for ENJOYING IT so much. <3

KARKAT: BUT I RESENT THE IMPLICATION THAT MY HAPPINESS IS REGISTERING FOR YOU AS YOU HAVING TO JUST "SIT AROUND AND WATCH ME GET OLD," BECAUSE I KNOW YOU KNOW IT'S MORE THAN THAT.

I’m glad Karkat knows that DAVE knows somewhere in him that it’s more than that, because yeah, if Karkat thought he DIDN’T know that at some level that’d be a reason to take MUCH MORE SERIOUS offense.

KARKAT: LIKE, JESUS, DAVE. YOU KNOW I'M AFRAID FOR YOU, TOO, RIGHT? KARKAT: OR DID YOU FORGET THE WHOLE HEROIC DEATH THING? KARKAT: I WORRY ABOUT LOSING YOU FAIRLY FUCKING REGULARLY.

Hah!!! Point taken. Karkat must view Dave as practically more fragile than HIM.

KARKAT: ONE: WE'VE BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH HELLACIOUS PANWARPING TRAUMA THAT I REFUSE TO NOT ENJOY THIS SHIT WHEN I FINALLY FUCKING GET IT, NO MATTER HOW LONG IT MAY OR MAY NOT LAST. KARKAT: TWO: IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE DOING NOTHING. WE’RE MOVING. WE’RE WORKING. WE’RE HEADED SPECIFICALLY TO A PLACE WHERE WE WILL UNDOUBTLEDLY ENDURE YET MORE FUCKING HELLACIOUS PANWARPING TRAUMA. KARKAT: AND THREE: WE'RE DOING THAT BECAUSE WE HAVE FRIENDS WHO WE CARE ABOUT THAT NEED US. THAT IS OUR FOCUS, HERE. NOT OUR FEAR. IT'S ABOUT THE PEOPLE WE HAVE TO SAVE. KARKAT: SO DON'T FUCKING WORRY ABOUT ME, DAVE. I'M FINE.

Okay, this is great and wholesome. I am now retroactively GLAD that this topic got brought up. :)

> ==>

Dave is still afraid. There is a part of him that will always be, he thinks. He has accepted this about himself. There is another feeling coursing through him too, though. It’s something he's felt before, though never quite so intensely. He looks up at Karkat and understands, viscerally, the simple power his words have. They pump through Dave’s own body, alive and warm and true.

He wonders if Karkat realizes it, or if he’s just, as always, saying what he feels as he feels it. Dave doesn’t attempt to dissect it further. There will be time for that later.

Every really loving moment like this is sort of undercut by the fact that it’s also, in some senses, part of alt!Calliope’s narration and, by extension, her fanfiction.

EDIT 2: There's also either a hint to potential Blood powers or even an explicit Blood power use here that I didn't recognize. I'm leaning towards it's-laying-the-groundwork-for-future-use-of-Blood-powers-but-isnt-magical-in-this-case.

> ==>

Smooooch!

That was nice. Still gonna wait on doing any commentary til next time or a Bonus update or two, cause I’m beat. See y’all next time!

#Homestuck #hs2 #Homestuck Liveblog #upd8 #Homestuck^2 #spoiler #spoilers #Breath and Blood #Light and Void

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