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anna-scribbles · 19 days

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if the agrestes weren't rich i think that gabriel would be the normal one. like gabe's problem is that he stopped running into natural limits due to absurd wealth and his obsessive nature led him to develop some kind of god complex where he won't accept that anything is out of his control. I think that if gabe was broke again and just simply couldn't afford to go on an international goose chase for ancient magic artifacts of untold power, if he had to work a 9-5 to live and couldn't just disappear into his basement lair to commit domestic terrorism and say evil monologues to himself, then he would be way more normal. he'd just be some guy. he might even let himself have a mowhawk again. but I think that emilie would be way LESS normal if they weren't rich. like emilie needs so many people to be obsessed with her so much all the time in order for her to function. and gabe would still have his toxic codependent obsession with her, sure, but that wouldn't be nearly enough. emilie has to be at the center of the world's spotlight at all times because she doesn't know how to exist if she's not performing. anyway all this to say I am so certain that if the agrestes were not disgustingly wealthy, emilie agreste would one million percent be running a massive family vlogger youtube channel

#this post is sponsored by the version of emilie agreste who lives in my mind #in this scenario adrien still exists so maybe he's a normal baby somehow. but the important thing is that he's still exploited #this is just an exercise for me in thinking about how much of the agreste family dynamic you could preserve if they were middle class #how much wealth is an enabler of the terrible things happening in that house #but yeah agreste family vloggers au. I guess.#where adrien shows up at school and everybody knows him because his mom posted his potty training videos online and everything since #he has no secrets every milestone he's ever had has been packaged up and sold to the public #until he becomes chat noir of course. etc #oh god emilie would vlog her own death😭 help #get ready with me to die and haunt the narrative🤩#ml #anna rambles #I wrote this because im not finishing my homework:(

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botanyshitposts · 10 months

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fellas. ive been really aching for academia lately. i miss it so much

#ACHING for it.#fuck man. Oh god #life happened and so much has been going on #but we have a place to live now and I’m like!! Oh god I miss it I miss the guys (plants) and the rigor and everything #yes I still have work but that’s not super researchy if that makes sense

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lunarharp · 11 months

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into the deep end - 30k T orufrey fic, focusing on memory trauma, disability, and romance.

the sweet oblivion of the victim, the poisoned freedom of the other.

for one moment - it had felt like two parts returned - the needed reunion of two disparate halves. no more secrets, no more pain.

the moment you get to give back what you never wanted to take. that moment, under the night-blooming flowers, when they had both let out the same single broken sigh of relief.

but they were never whole to begin with, were they?

qifrey swore he wouldn't say 'sorry' to this man any more if he could help it - sorry is cheap now. he didn't want to be in a position ever again where you only have 'sorry' left. so he just looks down into the threads of his blanket, strains his eye until it hurts, feeling his insides - his throat, heart and head - burn with pain. he expects more, but olly says nothing.

olly says nothing.

#witch hat tag #orufrey #sorry i wanted to make a new post for my fic since the first illustration is new.#*stands in the middle of a desolate field in the pouring rain* Please Read My Tale...Blease..Oh god please..*collapses to the ground*#someone asked if there's spoilers in it. Um...yes. Sorry...it's about everything #maybe i should describe it more? it's about qifrey becoming more and more disabled - as i feel is his canon trajectory #and both of them processing the choices that have been made. it was necessary for me to explore this in order to fully understand orufrey #and for them to have the cathartic conclusion-that's why this is important to me for my witch hat fanwork making life. this connects it all #and having dived into qifrey's mind and lived through oru's feelings i was able to get to a place that is possible for them.#the hit/kudos ratio is so pathetic idek what happened. ppl opening it realising its long and saving it for later or just bailing lmfao #idek any more i hate advertising my writing i hate trying to get more ppl to read my long fics it's so hard 🥲#i'm so much prouder of this than my art...i was able to sink deeply into the orufrey feelings i had always wanted to fully explore #so. it's there lol.........i reread the date/kiss segment today after trying to forget about it thinking maybe the fic is just BAD lol #and like.....nope! i like it very much and this is what i was trying to get across. and it's always there to be read by anyone who wants to #and i will always remember the bliss i felt while writing when i was just lost in their world and living as them. dear GOD i love them.#i'm grateful to myself that i put in the work and love to make this so that i can always come back to it. i wanna illustrate scenes properly #but i'm never satisfied with drawing things i've written because i just can't capture the vivid experience in my mind. maybe one day.

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lavendorii · 7 months

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it's very late but I'm getting very emotional about the "statue at the lake" excerpt from the lost library and the reveal of how it went in the duet . something about sunny falling into the lake and the final line of "[sunny] shuts his eyes... and waits for the brothers to save him." when in reality it was mari that ran to the dock and hurled herself into the lake to save her little brother. I'm in shambles

#just thinking about what was going on above water in that instant. was there a long panic? hesitation? did she see what happened and drop #everything to jump in after her dear brother?#and then the foil of how hero jumped in to save sunny after he jumped in the lake to get basil. oh my god #i love mari so much #she loves him so fucking much it didnt matter what happened it didnt matter if it was dangerous to jump in it didnt matter that she was in #her nice pretty white dress #she was going to save her little brother no matter what #and once someone she loved was in danger #she was a force to be reckoned with #anyway. fucking explodes and dies forever #txt #omori #omori spoilers

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jemmo · 1 year

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that final scene in this ep of utsukushii kare. it feels like someone just ripped out my gut, slashed it open and trampled over the bloody remains. i want to sob. I want to out loud, fat tears, shaking my body sob. but all im stuck on is hira’s brokenly confused face, kiyoi on top of him grabbing onto his clothes and crying, an absolute tornado of emotion the likes of which he’s never shown, all to hira, all because of hira, and yet hira sits there and it’s like the storm covers him but he’s inside this impenetrable building and not a single drop of rain hits him. he knows it’s raining, he can hear it battering down on the roof, but it’s just rain. he doesn’t understand the full extent, doesn’t know the wind is ripping down trees and lightening is cracking the sky in two. and because he’s inside, he doesn’t need to know, doesn’t care to know, doesn’t want to know. hira will happily stay inside, in his bubble, in his constructed world, and he will be alone, and he will suffer, but that’s alright bc he’s not out there.

it’s like he’s gotten used to the internalized problems he faces, and they stick with him, almost a comfort to him now, in that he’ll see them when they’re not there. the external things that make him worried and anxious now, they’re less so, but hira still is that high school kid, getting picked on for his stutter, that faded into the background. he’s stuck there, and he’s never grown past it, and there’s almost a security in not growing, not changing, even if the thing you’re stuck as is worry and anxiety and invisibility and self doubt and constant internal doubt and criticism and lack of confidence. at least he’s used to it. at least there isn’t anything new to challenge him. and it shows, bc whenever he is challenged, in the sense that something that doesn’t fit he’s established world and role happens, he puts himself down and apologizes, like it’s a practiced, default reaction. that’s how he got through before, it’s how he learned to get through. but now, in the place he finds himself, in the situation and relationship he’s in, this is not a place for that reaction. the people he’s around, kiyoi, he doesn’t need hira to put himself down. he doesn’t need apologies. he wants understanding. and hira just resolutely refused that, said that he not only doesn’t understand hira, but that he doesn’t want to, and he’s not going to attempt to. and I don’t think he could have said anything more heartbreaking to kiyoi. all he has ever wanted was for someone to see him and understand him and love him for it. hira gives him love, unendingly and uncritically. he’s love is irrespective of anything kiyoi does or says or feels. it’s love of an idea, of a theory, of a concept in a pretty shell. it’s not love of the human inside, it can’t be, bc he just said he doesn’t want to understand that person, and without that there can’t be love. you can’t love something you can’t see or comprehend, that there’s a person kiyoi that isn’t the god kiyoi there is in his universe.

and the thing is, I think hira could’ve understood kiyoi, back when he saw a side of kiyoi that no one else did and still showed him love. I think down the line he could’ve gotten to know that person more and liked him, but the thing is, it’s different bc of kiyoi’s feelings. bc kiyoi’s feelings contradict so much what hira believes about himself that he can’t understand him. it’s easier to not know kiyoi that way and stick to his established universe, rather than understand kiyoi fully, bc in that he has to reevaluate everything, about himself and his place in the world and kiyoi’s place too. that is not an easy task. and it’s not that hira wouldn’t, I don’t think. I think there is a feasible future where hira recognizes that choice he can make and chooses kiyoi, chooses to challenge himself out of love for kiyoi and a want to understand him, and maybe even a want to understand and love himself. but bc he doesn’t recognize that as a choice he can make, he can’t do it. and I think that’s what hira needs to face, which I think is more than kiyoi and his feelings and care for hira can manage to accomplish. hira’s mental dissonance is gonna be a work in progress, it’s just a matter or him realizing it and getting to a point of actually working on it. the only thing is, in the meantime, can kiyoi be patient with hira, and the hurt he makes him feel? should he? bc when hira outright refuses to understand, when it feels that rigid and definite, when there’s no feasible future where he will understand, what’s the point? that’s the heartbreak. that hira is constantly worrying about forever, but he just denied a forever with kiyoi. and the problem is him, just not for the reasons he thinks he is. he needs to realize there is no forever with kiyoi the god, bc gods don’t last forever, they’re ephemeral, they’re fleeting. there can be a forever with kiyoi though, the man, the person, the human being, he just needs to step outside, into the storm, and let it soak him. bc when he gets to stand with kiyoi in the rain, he’ll see it’s worth it.

#im on my rant shit but oh my god what an ep #like seriously #if I were ever to get the bravery to make a video essay it’d be on utsukushii kare #and it’d be 7 hours long of me incoherently rambling sobbing screaming and foaming at the mouth #bc this show is just that good #like never before have I wanted to crawl inside a character like hira #and never before have I wanted to hold and cradle and love a character as bad as I do kiyoi #they are everything #and this #this is how you do s2 drama #this is how you take a couple that have gotten together and show that things are not perfect just bc they kiss #there is so much more to a relationship #and so much more depth for character investigation and growth and struggle when a relationship is established #that’s when the real work begins #when you take something just beginning a small flame and try to build it and and stoke it into something that can survive and last and burn #forever doesn’t just happen it is created #and hira needs to find a way to make it #utsukushii kare #utsukushii kare 2 #my beautiful man #my beautiful man 2

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crimsongrimoire · 8 months

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im not sorry for the kind of person i will become when wriothesley gets released

#wriolette #neuvithesley #ngl kinda hate that tag. ugh. pain in the ass to spell scrambles my brain #genshin #crow.txt #snippets #not sfw #uhhh i think thats all the relevant tags. sorry it will happen again oh my god i love them listen....#i have many thoughts. so many #yeah yeah i cant get an accurate read on wrios personality yet bc hes not REAL yet. but im so impatient i love him so bad #playstyle design presuned lore everything im going to EAT him.#neuvi too but im way less insane about him. hes definitely good but not as Crow Bait. wrio is literally just. so much shit i go crazy over #also would love to know how to pronounce That bc. boy howdy huh.#also how is bottom wrio already so hardcore underrated. pleaseplease please youte nothing. both ways are good. take my hand.

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puppyeared · 1 year

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Spirit tracks is fun teehee

#ITS FUN HAVING ZELDA AS A COMPANION OK… title character gets to be playable omg #god. they are everything to me idk why but spirit tracks zelink is my fav by far #It feels more earned I guess? The other zelda games I’ve played p much established zelink as like some unspoken thing #Like uhhh skyward sword gets brought up a lot bc childhood friends. And breath of the wild although I do like botw zelink #But like you get to see their relationship develop in spirit tracks like they go from oh cool we’re teammates to YOU ARE MY BFF #I also like Zelda piping up whenever something happens like. I remember I used to go swimming here do u wanna go swimming when I get #My body back. Also I like being nice to her we are besties your honor #2nd image is my fav expression in windwaker when his magic gauge increase HIS FACE IS EVERYTHING PLEASEEE #I also drew tetra wearing something like baro’t saya? Using her game model and pictures of dresses and the boxer codex #Everything I’m putting on here is experimental anyway cause I’m checking Wikipedia on my own culture 🫡#BUT HELL IT WOULD BE COOL like tetra could have a more rugged baro’t cause like she’s a captain and she needs it when on open sea right #And I can imagine tracks zelda having more of a traje de mestiza dress because it’s more fancy right.. waving my hands #Sometimes Filipino zelda can be something so personal bro #My art #myart #doodles #the legend of zelda #legend of zelda #loz #Spirit tracks #wind waker #took link #Zelink #zelda #Tetra

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mxdotpng · 3 months

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the progression of events in this arc is so so good and great and i love how you can just clearly see where and how each characters thoughts begin and progress throughout each chapter as it goes on. while steven was probably set in stone about his view on how to handle the situation i earnestly believe zed and zapp set out to disobey steven's request. and then they make it very easy to understand leo's point of view and why hes doing what he is - its why they show us that flashback and don't tell anyone else, and why he speaks very little after zapp threatens him - and then immediately cuts to klaus, who knows absolutely nothing about the situation currently but he can figure it out just by looking at whats in front of him. and because klaus is so unflinching when it comes to upholding what he believes is morally right he does so without anyone needing to tell him whats going on. he sees this percieved 'monster' protecting someone else and immediately goes to protect it, too. and even though a lot of them disagreed with each other at the beginning there is still the scene afterwards where they all come together to try and catch each other when they begin falling. i think nightow should pay me for what its done to my mental health

#.text #kekkai sensen #sorry this arc made me normal.#i love that panel with zed even if i cant stop laughing. hes a skater boy. SOOO funny #ddo you get it #not about skater boy zed about the other more dire thing happening in this post. FORGET about skater boy zed #im being miserable again. oh my god. kekkai sensen #i know nightow just loves to leave things as is like after it ends it ends but i wished i couldve seen the aftermath #like. what steven was thinking. what zapp and zed were thinking. klaus also he was like in prison for most of that #SOOO funny that he like. gets arrested at random unfairly. everything is pretty much fine. and then when he gets out #the city is on fire two of his coworkers are in the hospital chain is nowhere to be seen the prison has exploded #there are vampires on the loose femt is there for some reason and there is a 10 million dollar bounty on leo's head #klaus leaves for FIVE MINUTES and THIS happens #dude doesnt even like stop to think about it he immediately turns around and go. hummer. throw me as far as you can.#and then they did.#amazing. this is the best manga ever.#wow ive gotten off topic sorry. anyway #i added that giant paragraph of text after all of these tags sorry guys i know im annoying and saying things that were probably #said 5 years ago but um. im late to the party. and i dont know how to shut up. so you have to deal with it #also i included the panel with neji and riel because i think it says so much. that theyre the ones saying this.#neji doesnt even remember leo almost getting his head bashed in just in the off chance that it could save his life and still he Knows #like they know more than anyone probably how leo sacrifices everything he has for the people around him #and i like that nightow included them in something so important and so defining of his character.#they appear once. twice. so little. but theyre integral to how hes percieved by others and by us.#anyway. kkss is good.#this post happened because i'm trying to draw and needed references but my kkss folder is 900+ images #and i got distracted by these pages in there #because i couldnt resist rereading them #if i could add more than 10 images id also add the like 3 pages of them falling and trying to catch each other at the end #but. alas. woah i ran out of tags bye everyone. thanks or sorry if you read all of this

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p4nishers · 1 year

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thinking about how bobby acted so different during/after the lightning strike bc he wasn't a captain trying to save his subordinate. he was a father, desperate for his son to be in his arms again.

#like okay. yeah it was clear they made it EXTREMELY clear that this is what happened but like. im actually gonna vomit everytime i think #about it.#i love bobby so fucking much oh my god #they mean so much to me like i cant even think abt them too long without bursting into tears #bobby nash #evan buckley #911 fox #911 spoilers #911 6b #buck and bobby #911 6x10 #im specifically referring to before buck got in the hospital. like the 'i got u kid i got u' is actually everything to me

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srapsodia · 9 months

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ghost trick really is such a great game I GET THE HYPE NOW I GET IT!!!! IM RIGHT THERE WITH YALL!!!!

#finished it yesterday and my roomate came in while i was watching the credits and asks me what happened #and im like SO MUCH HAPPENED. SO MUCH HAPPENED OH MY GOD AAAAAAAAA #FANTASTIC game ugh ughhh. extremely shu takumi ass game in the best possible way djdjdk #shu takumi truly makes the queerest characters and we thank him for his service #cabanela and jowd.... i am looking i am LOOKING 👁👁#also king of weird little girls. A+ character designs. the animations were stellar and the MUSIC AUGHHH #im in love with everything about this game. that scene with ray... i got *EMOTIONAL*. I YELLED #truly game of all time #raps talks

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boxwinebaddie · 2 months

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Is Chef alive? Like please tell me that man is still out there living his best life.

chef is...Alive.

but i wouldn't say he's living his best life, no.

( sigh...tw for sexual assault, coercion and violence )

so basically, when stan figured out that e.t. tenorman was cartman, which, an anon asked if if stan knows e is cartman...yes, he does.

and all too well.

his music savant boy synesthesia went crazy when cartman started talking the first time they reunited and he couldn't place why this man he'd never met before sounded oddly familliar and why...

his voice sounded like the worst sound in the world.

but he didn't need to wait long for his answer, because right before their first big band meeting ended and all the music/marketing execs, scott, jimmy and kenny left the room, cartman caught stan by his shirt front, yanked him violently towards him and whispered...

"hello, shannon." ;)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA FUCK YOU!!!!

so basically cartman is black-mailing ravenstan into being complaint and doing whatever he wants and honestly, more than telling people that raven is stan...e knows that stan doesn't care about himself, he doesn't care about getting hurt/what happens to him...but that the way to hurt him...

is by hurting other people.

specifically the people he cares about.

so when ravenstan tries to back out of the band bc fuck this, who cares if it's his dream, it's not worth this...it's fucking not.

so stan is like "what. do. you. want."

and cartman is like..."what i've always wanted, of course..."

"your compliance, your undying devotion..."

"your body."

AAAAAAAAAAAA I HATE YOU I HAAATE YOU

i want to Scream, oh my GOOOOD!!!!! FUCK YOU

and then he's basically like "here's the deal, sh@n..."

( he misgenders stan a lot by the way...please die )

"either you give me what i want, whatever i want, whenever i want or else everyone around you, all the stupid, silly little people you love...will suffer for your spite and disobedience. is that clear?"

and stan just rolls his eyes like "fuck you, cartman. you're all talk; that's all you've ever been. all bark no bite, you fucking purse perro."

and cartman is like..."oh?" takes his phone out, dials a number & says

"do it."

and about ten minutes later, kenny calls him and is like

"stan??? S-STAN??? ARE YOU THERE???"

"DAD HAS BEEN SHOT."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA FUCKFUCKFUFKC

and stan is crying and screaming like "oh my god, oh my god, fuckfuckfuck!!!!! is-is he okay...ken, is he--is he--"

glaring at cartman, ready to lunge, shocked, horrified...

Disgusted.

and ken replies "no...no he's...he's alive. it was just his shoulder, but, oh my god, stan--holy FUCK. we have--we have to go see him, stan!!"

and stan wants to tell them it's this PINCHE PENDEJO CARTMAN who terrorized him his whole childhood, but cartman just shakes his head and mouthes 'no' then lifts his finger to say 'shh' and then takes that same finger and runs it across his throat as if to say...

'talk and i'll kill him.'

so stan's face crumples bc he's Helpless and he has no choice, so he just chokes back a sob and is like 'no, we can't. we have this record deal. we have to sign the contract tomorrow. it's—it’s important."

and kenny is aghast like "mORE IMPORTANT THAN DAD ALMOST DYING??? STAN!!! WHAT ARE YOU EVEN SAYING, FUCK THAT WE HAVE TO SEE DAD, WE HAVE TO--"

and stan just goes "We’re. Not. Going." and hangs up.

cartman snickers and smirks and stan's face's so mad and sad. he wants to scream like this is so fkn horrible this is his worst nightmare

...then chef calls him.

dad.

the only dad he's ever known.

and cartman just smiles and goes

"tell him you hate him and you never want to see him again."

and stan is shaking his head, he's practically pleading, shouting

"nonoNONONO!!! anything. pl-please don't make me do this, p-ple--"

but cartman simply commands

"or else."

so chef on the phone is like "h-hey, blue. look, i'm okay, i'm okay. don't cry, i know how you are kid. i'm gonna be alright, it's gonna take more than some dumb bullet to put your old man in the ground. the whole thing was so odd...? they think it was...a stray bullet. crossfire. gang stuff. you know how it is out here. but it just 'minded me of how short life can be, how fast things can go. so don't worry. and i know...i know i was cross with you and ken for leaving. i know i said it was a useless dream and you two would come home all heartbroken with your tails between your legs...but you're making a real name for yourself! well, a fake one, i suppose, hah. but i just wanted to say...that i'm real proud of you, kiddo. and i--i miss you.

i love you, stanley."

and stan's just listening, crying wordlessly, clutching his phone so hard that his knuckles go white and all he wants to do is tell his dad he loves him and he's sorry, he's so fucking sorry, this is all his fault, this is all his fucking fault like always, for dreaming to big and being oblivious and a fuck up and getting everyone wrapped up in his mess

but he can't...so in a deadpan with his eyes shut, all he says is

"i hate you."

and chef's like "haha, real funny, stan. but if you're tryna hurt my heart to distract me from my shoulde--"

and stan just interrupts him in the same terse, robotic voice.

choking back sobs and screams, shaking so hard he can't see.

"listen to me. i never...i never want to speak to you again. ken...ken feels the same. don't call me. or them. don't call here ever again. ever. don't try and reach out, don't look for us. things are different now."

and chef is so confused and sad and scared like he literally just got shot and somehow this is worse...this is so much work. so with his heart breaking in his voice, he says...

"is that...is that really want you want, son?"

and stan just goes...

"it's..."

and he can barely say it, holy fuck. but he does and it's

"what i want."

but that's not all.

oh, no, my friends.

because it's time for the big finish.

the stan finale.

ravenstan grits his teeth, tears and blood in his mouth, then says

"and i'm not your son.

you're not...

...you're not my real dad.

never have, never will be.

goodbye."

and clicks off and FUCK. it's not true, it's all a fucking lie. but he needed to say something that hurt so badly that his dad wouldn't call him again...something so excruciating that it would end it all.

and cartman just gives him a round of applause while stan is sneering and seething and sobbing because he just had to do the second worst thing he's ever done in his life and cartman is...

clapping and cheering.

it's sick.

and cartman's like "bravo. that was quite the performance, marsh. you're quite the little actress, aren't you?"

AAAAAAAAAAAA I'M SO MAD!!! DIEDIEDIIIIE

this is all part of a very horrible flashback chapter way in the future and i will say that it ends...with cartman telling him to do something, the awful sound of his belt unbuckling...

and stan's knees hitting the floor.

I'M SICK!!!!! AAAA!!! and it's so horrible because it's his whole life, it's his dad all over again ( yes, i'm disgusted ) and him threatening to punish shelley and sharon if he doesn't comply, it's all the horrible men at ruffians, their horrible, hungry hands and mouths and stares all over him so he could sing on fridays. and now it's being indebted to cartman, being trapped again, forced to do disgusting shit. Again.

one bird cage to the next...who cares if it's golden, right?

but yeah, the boys get signed, everyone is super excited and stan's like yay...yippee...this is so fun. kenny, ofc, thinks that chef just cut ties, decided he doesn't support their dreams and that's that. also the other boys slowly get coerced by cartman in different ways...i will say that kenny is super addicted to coke and cartman is basically using that to control them and keep them disillusioned and devoted.

one last thing is that during marj's party in the cd manwhorsion during my second favorite chapter, cartman is talking to kyle and the blondies haus and is like 'i see you've met my songbird...pretty isn't she? well trained too. sings whenever i ask, isn't that right, raven?'

and idk his hand is like halfway up raven's shirt and raven is just laughing and nodding looking so ready to die, downing his drink.

and once he gets away, raven is bolting for the door and kyle's super concerned like 'hey...are you okay? that guy...i don't like the way that guy was talking to you." super protective crush mode jersey activate.

and stan's just like "don't, kyle. it's fine. i-i'm fine...."

and kyle is like "you don't--you don't look fine, raven...you look..."

and stan, who never raises his voice is like

"I SAID LEAVE. IT. ALONE. JERSEY.”

and storms out.....aaaaaaaaaa fuck we're in hell.

anyways! cheers! mazel! enjoy your horrible, deplorable, hurt no comfort lore that makes me want to literally Krill Myself.

-uncle nina, who is going to murder rm!cartman w/ my bare hands

#okay please don't read this post if you are at all uncomfortable with the tw topics or dark themes in general #unfortunately rm is not pep and while pep is dark...this fanfic is very fucked up v bad things happen to it and to the ppl we luv #god the way stan just continues to be trapped in horrible situations that make him sick and has no agency and is a marinette #i hate everything so bad he is just literally doomed i love him so much he sacrifices so much for everyone around him #my sweet sweet lovely kind angel boy #you don't deserve any of this i'm so sorry my love #oh my god i'm so fucking sad why am i like this #i couldn't just write a NICE fanfiction like man COME ON #oh i just know when kyle finds out its so over #like he is going to beat him bloody #everyone who has ever laid a hand on stanley marsh is going to lose it and then their life #not the kyle when he’s vulnerable and shaken but the jersey when he’s trying to push him away #I HATE IT HERE I LOVE U STAN I LOVE U BABY

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jalapenobee · 21 days

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do ygs ever think abt zen and inukai as partners before shit went down or is it just me

#what kind of duo do you think they were........mentor mentee............bffs..........some guy and his flashy friend..........#i need to know what their relationship was like #do you think inukai took him out for drinks when they met. do you think he showed him the ropes and everything.#saying this based on the assumption inukai joined first (i think so? hes much older too)#oh god i need to know everything now #guys they were partners for FIVE YEARS or close to it you cant tell me nothing happened. there is a history there and i wanna know #paradox live

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hecksupremechips · 4 months

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The fact that Junpei proposed to Akane in ztd just baffles me every time I think about it like. He doesn’t know anything about her. They were friends for, what? A year? When they were kids. And Junpei never even knew she was an orphan or that she had a brother. Given just how important Aoi is to Akane and the massive role he played in her life, it’s very telling that Junpei doesn’t know about him. He also doesn’t seem too interested in Akane as a person. He only likes the idea of her, of sharing a bed or taking a shower together, but when she actually starts talking about her interests such as the titanic, he thinks she’s talking nonsense and only plays along when he doesn’t know what else to say. He also has this image of her as a damsel in distress (partially because Akane puts up an innocent persona to avoid suspicion) and he wants to play an action hero who protects her from seeing the scary dead body, completely oblivious to the fact that she put them there, that she wants that bastard dead. And how much does he come to terms with the truth after the nonary game? He feels betrayal, resentment, but he still proposes to her. He still spends his life chasing after her. He still puts himself and quark in a potentially dangerous situation in order to see her again. Junpei doesn’t have his shit together at all, he refuses to accept that the girl he liked as a kid isn’t perfect and has changed, has changed without him

#zero escape #junpei tenmyouji #my god this man. he really needs to get standards🙄#im very conflicted about the choice to have him propose to akane cuz like on one hand #it really emphasizes just how not well adjusted junpei is and it sets the stage for how he is in vlr #and like i wouldnt want him to have his shit together in ztd in regards to akane he doesnt move on until after vlr #at least in that specific timeline anyway #but on the other hand the game just does suuuch a bad job with the proposal like its treated as cute #when it really fucking isnt its absolutely pathetic that junpei wants to propose to her after everything thats happened #and in general the scene where they get engaged just fucking sucks lol its so weird #i hate it so much goddddd i am not cheering when they get engaged i am seething with rage #cuz theyre ruining their lives cuz they dont fucking love each other or know each other!!! RAWRRRR #oh junpei you fucked up little man just let me. hold your hand 😩

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grapejuicegay · 2 years

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I’ve already mentioned some of this but I finally have enough to flesh this out a little. I’ve been working under the theory that Suppalo/the curse/Chadok is the sun, Akk is working directly under the influence of it, Ayan is the moon.

I’ve also talked about power and control in relation to Namo but let’s talk about it now with the curse as well. The legend is that the curse becomes stronger closer to the eclipse, that the eclipse is the time that people need to stay in line more than ever.

During an eclipse, when the moon covers the sun the sun’s influence is reduced. So if control over the students is through the sun, the moon covering it would mean the loss on control.

Of course it’s during the moment of least control is when you would want the fear of unknown consequences to keep people in line when you can’t exert direct control, when your influence and power over them is weakened.

Now look at this post by @25shadesoffebruary about how the eclipse is happening in this moment when Ayan leans into Akk. And it happens over and over this episode. It keeps on happening every time Ayan and Akk get close (before this episode too!)

But now look at Chadok when he confronts Akk in the school at night.

He stands in the light in a way that it basically seems to be emanating from him, completely engulfing Akk in its shadow. He reminds Akk of his responsibilities and adds in a sprinkle of fear in the form of a scholarship - if you don’t do what I expect of you, you lose the scholarship. He’s using fear to maintain his influence.

And it works

Look at the light basically on top of Akk’s head during the judo takedown when Akk is trying to push Ayan away as much as he can. He’s back in prefect mode (shortly before he tries to get Ayan to leave the school, even threatening to bring the curse back)

And here’s the placement of the same light in the same room when they were practicing judo alone a few episodes ago.

Usually when they’re close to each other, Akk pulls Ayan in and covers the light. But right now, the light is looming directly over him.

Akk is under the control of the light (Chadok) trying to resist the pull of the eclipse.

Also, Akk, the morning after he was cornered by Dika, sleeping in the direct sun under the comfort of a blanket covered in stars. Like the night could be a source of comfort against the stress he’s under with the light.

Bonus: Akk being protected from the sun by the starry blanket and the eclipse sweatshirt

And after Ayan spends some time taking care of him when he’s sick? He wakes up tended for, being protected from the sun by the stars and and eclipse right over his chest.

#they're doing so much for the story visually!!!#kan told thua they're getting closer to the eclipse #and they are #it's going to happen sooner or later #(and judging from the previews... much much sooner)#i'm so excited to see how they deal with everything #but i absolutely trust them to do it well #the eclipse #the eclipse series #oh god i hope this is coherent #the photo of the kiss is also a lil treat for reading my bullshit #thanks <3

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