#no bcs i’m not gonna be able to stfu about it??????
Note
omg omg stella I have to tell you this!!!!! but I started writing the vamp jake fic and oml I'm obsessed already 😍 I already know it's gonna tug on so many heartstrings and I'm absolutely here for it 🤭🤭
oh nO KAYLA YOURE OUT FOR BLOOD ⁉️⁉️ vampy jake that’s gonna tug on so many heartstrings HELLO no one is ready my beloved kayla please 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
no bcs the love i hold for vampy jake.
#AND YOURE MAKING HIM A PRINCE TOO HELOOOOOO#no one is ready no one is PREPARED#if he’s as obsessive as the vampy#jake that u wrote…#then omg.#you’re this 🤏 close to making me turn into a full time jake stan#ENOUGH >:(#no but i’m sO EXCITELJESLEND#like buzzing in my seat with my legs shaking excited yk#i just know you’re gonna devour 🙏🏼(and murder all of us on the way too) pls add me to the taglist 😁🙏🏼#no bcs i’m not gonna be able to stfu about it??????#why would u tELL ME this how am i supposed to go on with my day now.#vampy prince jake 🫶🏼#asks & responses <3#ᓭི༏ᓯྀ‧₊˚ — ♡ 𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.#— kayla ! ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
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feather , part 32
“ you miss me? ”
series m. list
previous chapter
next chapter
( socialmedia!au )
yourusername
liked by lhughes_06, jackhughes, _quinnhughes, and 237,966 others
yourusername hughes appreciation post has come! (they wouldn’t leave me alone until i swore i would do it)
tagged: jackhughes, lhughes_06, _quinnhughes
view all comments
mackie.samo when did luke let you put flowers in his hair??
→ yourusername senior year 🙏🙏
→ lhughes_06 IT WAS FOR PROM OKAY
→ mackie.samo awww were you each others’ prom date??
→ yourusername yes 🙄
→ edwards.73 YOU OWE ME $50 mackie.samo
→ lhughes_06 you guys bet on us going to prom together??? a year after prom??
→ markestapa yes
username44 luke’s second pic 🥰
username98 OH MY GOD QUINNN
→ yourusername THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING
markestapa that pasta was fire esp with the cheese on top
→ yourusername mark.. we don’t have cheese
→ markestapa WAS THAT HIS FUCKING DANDRUFF
→ trevorzegras LMFAOOOO
→ jackhughes I DON’T HAVE DANDRUFF
→ colecaufield explain the “cheese” 🤨 jackhughes
→ jackhughes no further comment.
_quinnhughes hey wait my pics aren’t bad
→ yourusername EXACTLY I’M NOT THAT MEAN
→ yourusername i mean i still like the canadiens better but I’M NOT MEAN 🙏
→ _quinnhughes oh 😒
→ colecaufield WOOOOO
→ yourusername GO HABS 😈😈
rutgermcgroarty i’m surprised jack was able to carry you
→ jackhughes are you calling me weak
→ yourusername are you calling me hard to carry
→ rutgermcgroarty wait no i was just saying yk bc i had to carry you and i was struggling but only a bit and not because you’re hard to carry or anything 😰😰
→ adamfantilli bro can’t stop yapping
→ jackhughes maybe you’re just weak
→ yourusername maybe you’re the one that just can’t carry me
→ rutgermcgroarty stop teaming up on me 😕
lhughes_06 i’m looking pretty cute here
→ dylanduke25 yes you are 😘
→ markestapa cutest hughes brother 🙌
→ mackie.samo such a pretty princess 🥰
→ edwards.73 my little cutie patootie 😻
→ lhughes_06 oh mackie.samo edwards.73
→ yourusername even tho ur my bsf i’m gonna have to say my bf is cuter
→ lhughes_06 sad to say you’re not wrong 😔
username2 STOP TEASING USSSS
username31 girl i need to know and i need to know now
_alexturcotte now that i think about it you only have quinn and jack’s jerseys
→ yourusername i have luke’s michigan jersey 😔
→ lhughes_06 WHAT i thought i sent you mine already
→ yourusername it’s okay lukey you’re fine if i just wear quinn’s right 😁
→ trevorzegras damn lil drizz i see you (you’re not slick i know what you’re doing)
→ lhughes_06 i wanna see my name and number on your back yourusername
→ yourusername i mean.. technically it is your name and number on my back 🤗🤗
→ lhughes_06 stfu 🙄🙄
→ yourusername shutting the fuck up 😕
→ lhughes_06 i better see you wearing a DEVILS jersey with my name before the next game
→ yourusername yes sir 🫡
→ _alexturcotte what the hell did i just do 😨
luca.fantilli fantilli appreciation post??
→ yourusername OH MY GOD LEAVE ME ALONE
→ adamfantilli do you not appreciate us ☹️
→ yourusername yes i appreciate you adam
→ luca.fantilli how much
→ yourusername very much
→ luca.fantilli enough to dedicate a whole post to us?
→ yourusername enough for you to not need a post that tells you how much i appreciate you 🙄
→ jackhughes stop stealing the spotlight guys
→ lhughes_06 fr she never appreciates us
→ _quinnhughes exactly
→ mackie.samo could never be us 🥱
→ maddy.samo say it louder for the people in the back 🗣️🗣️
→ msamoskevich she loves us more than all of you
→ colecaufield why are 3 families fighting over her
→ dylanduke25 CAN WE JOIN
→ tyler___duke5 IM READY TO FIGHT
→ trevorzegras dude come here griffinzegras
→ yourusername what the actual fuck
username74 all of them won the gene race wtf
colecaufield jack isn’t really doing it for me in that 2nd photo…
→ yourusername when is he ever doing it for you
→ colecaufield you’re right
→ jackhughes HEY this is supposed to be an appreciation post not a “let’s bully jack” post
→ _alexturcotte let’s bully jack
username90 pretty prettier and prettiest
username12 AYYYY THERES MY BOYS
username55 i have a hunch she’s doing this to throw us off even more
→ username36 i have a hunch she’s been doing this for way longer
trevorzegras why is luke’s kind of…
→ yourusername right 🤭
→ trevorzegras i meant in a bad way
→ yourusername oh
→ lhughes_06 how did you manage to turn this post into a weapon against us 😡
→ adamfantilli someone help luke’s talking like a fanfiction writer again
→ lhughes_06 I AM NOT
adamfantilli drysdale siblings try not to neglect us challenge go!
→ yourusername WHAT i don’t neglect you
→ luca.fantilli YES YOU DO
→ jamie.drysdale why did you have to rope me into this 😒
username11 fun fact guys it’s luke 😍😍
→ username79 wbk
→ username60 tell us something we don’t know
username23 they all look so ethereal
dylanduke25 won’t your bf be jealous that you keep posting these hotties
→ yourusername no bc they’re not hotties 🥰
→ _quinnhughes rude yourusername
→ lhughes_06 exactly i can’t believe he hasn’t gone insane yet
→ jackhughes we’re too 🔥
mackie.samo i heard from a little birdie that you’re not slick ‼️
→ yourusername i’m the slickest wym
→ yourusername they can’t sniff me out 🗣️🗣️
→ mackie.samo stfu ur so obvious
→ markestapa like you’re really obvious it’s embarrassing
→ dylanduke25 fr
→ yourusername NO IF WE DIDN’T TELL YOU THEN YOU WOULDN’T BE ABLE TO TELL
→ edwards.73 stop lying to yourself
→ adamfantilli we could tell wayyyyy before you even started dating
→ yourusername 😔
username35 what are they saying in mackie’s replies 🤯
username47 i could bet anyone 1k IN CASH that they’re dating and i know i would win
username81 waiting for the day she posts bad luke pics
→ yourusername not possible!
username1 yall i swear to god i saw her on a date with him yesterday
jamie.drysdale i can’t believe you appreciate them more than you appreciate me
→ yourusername NOT TRUE
→ jamie.drysdale YES TRUE
→ yourusername I MADE AN APPRECIATION POST FOR YOU ALREADY
→ jamie.drysdale THAT’S NOT ENOUGH
→ yourusername you’re so needy 😒
yourusername
liked by _quinnhughes, jackhughes, colecaufield, and 200,219 others
yourusername HELLO KITTY ☺️
view all comments
rutgermcgroarty i thought you were done with all your food posts
→ yourusername would you rather have me post my “lovesick” posts again
→ rutgermcgroarty i mean technically he’s still in the post
→ yourusername uh huh keep talking i dare you
→ rutgermcgroarty I MISSED YOUR FOOD POSTS SO MUCH
→ yourusername mhm 🤨
username46 OH MY GOD WHERE IS THAT STORE
username25 THE PIZZA???
_quinnhughes i was really hoping your hello kitty obsession fully died down
→ yourusername NEVERRR
jackhughes you haven’t posted ONE post without a picture of your bf since you got together
→ yourusername YES I HAVE
→ colecaufield no tf you haven’t
→ yourusername i’m sorry i love him too much 😞
→ luca.fantilli ick yourusername
→ dylanduke25 LADY BONER GONEEEEE
→ markestapa DUKER STOP
→ lhughes_06 aw that’s cute yourusername
username77 if jack said she hasn’t posted without a pic of her bf and last post ONLY had him and his brothers…….
→ username68 waiting for the day y’all stop acting like we all don’t know it’s lukey pooks
dylanduke25 when did he learn how to braid
→ yourusername when we were younger and i forced him to learn how to do my hair 🤗🤗
→ dylanduke25 AND I JUST FOUND THIS OUT?
→ _alexturcotte you’re late bro
→ jackhughes i’ve walked into his room one too many times and seen him braiding her hair
→ yourusername HEY BUT HE LIKES DOING MY HAIR
→ _quinnhughes you’re not helping his case 😭
edwards.73 your hair is so greasy
→ yourusername no it’s not yours is
→ edwards.73 if you stepped out into the sun rn you would be able to hear your hair sizzling
→ yourusername i could cook a whole five course meal from the amount of grease in your hair
→ mackie.samo DAMNN EDDY UR GONNA TAKE THAT??
→ yourusername he can’t think of a better comeback 🥱🥱
username27 WHEN HE KNOWS HOW TO DO YOUR HAIRRRR 🤭🤭
liked by yourusername
username91 hello kitty x dominos collab when 😱
username4 my foodie twinnem
lhughes_06 did you buy the pizzas?
→ yourusername no i baked them with my boyfriend 🥰
→ lhughes_06 he must be a REALLY good cook then
→ yourusername no actually he sucks ass and he almost burnt the kitchen down ‼️‼️
→ lhughes_06 oh 😐
colecaufield donuts 🤤🤤
→ yourusername is that all you got from this post
→ colecaufield DONUTS 🙂
_alexturcotte pizza 🤤🤤
→ yourusername did you two copy and paste your comments
→ _alexturcotte PIZZA 🙂
trevorzegras luke 🤤🤤
this comment has been deleted
trevorzegras your bf 🤤🤤
→ yourusername ZEGRAS I SWEAR
→ trevorzegras YOUR BF 🙂
→ yourusername next time i see you it’s on sight
luca.fantilli tell your little boyfriend that he needs to stop letting you steal him from us when you’re around
→ yourusername let’s be so honest i’ve always stolen him from you when i was around 🙄🙄
→ luca.fantilli EXACTLY SO TELL HIM
→ yourusername tell him yourself 🤬
→ lhughes_06 luca if i didn’t know any better i’d say you’re jealous
→ luca.fantilli i take it all back
jamie.drysdale you said you stopped liking hello kitty when you were 9 😐😐
→ yourusername LITERALLY WHEN DID I SAY THAT
→ jamie.drysdale you know when.
→ yourusername no i don’t?????
→ jamie.drysdale YES YOU DO
→ yourusername STOP TRYING TO GASLIGHT ME
username63 IM SO TIRED WAITING FOR THEM TO HARD LAUNCH
username41 we’ve been stuck in soft launch era for TOO LONG
username26 girl i love you but PLEASE JUST GIVE US CONFIRMATION
markestapa DID YOU SEE THAT ONE SHIRT
→ yourusername mark babe there’s a lot of shirts
→ markestapa THAT ONE HELLO KITTY SHIRT BUT IT SAID HELLO TITTY INSTEAD OF HELLO KITTY
→ yourusername NO??
→ markestapa IT’S SO FUNNY
→ yourusername you’re the type of guy to laugh at a hello titty shirt 😐
maddysamo i miss you 😞
→ mackie.samo BACK TF UP
→ yourusername I MISS YOU MORE
→ jackhughes oh my god get away
→ lhughes_06 you’re so defensive jack
→ dylanduke25 you’re one to talk lhughes_06
adamfantilli the frosting on the donuts kind of look like glue
→ yourusername throwback to your glue eating era ⁉️
→ adamfantilli I ONLY TOLD YOU THE STORY YOU WERENT EVEN THERE
→ yourusername high school sophomore eating liquid glue 😱😱
→ adamfantilli LITERALLY SHUT UP
→ lhughes_06 LMAOOO
→ yourusername don’t act like you didn’t eat glue all of your elementary school career luke
→ lhughes_06 oh 🙃
username21 hard launch when 🙁🙁
→ username59 apparently fucking never
username77 by the time they hard launch they’ll already be married with three kids and another one in the oven
liked by yourusername
→ username44 OMG SHE LIKED IT??
mackie.samo TECHNICALLY he forgot to braid and i taught him how to do it again
→ yourusername no go ahead take all the credit 🙄
→ lhughes_06 🫤🫤
→ rutgermcgroarty 🤓
→ markestapa ACKSHUALLY
→ edwards.73 nerd alerttttt 🚨🚨🚨
→ mackie.samo okay hate on me then 😒
next chapter
notes )
i’ve gotten to the point where i’m posting once in a blue moon but at the same time i’ve literally been procastinating in every aspect of my life
(i just spent 3 hours on one class’ assignments)
anyways THE HARD LAUNCH IS COMING SOON 🫢🫢
not proofread ‼️
tags: @aliaology @hockeyboysarehot @absolutelyhugh3s @jackquinnswife @freds-slut @love4ldr @blueeyedbesson @43hughes @v1olentdelights @dancerbailey3 @random-human02 @ho3forfakeguys@loveforaugust@cstads-blog@h0e4fictionalme-n
#luke hughes fanfic#luke hughes fic#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes x y/n#luke hughes#quinn hughes#jack hughes#alex turcotte#cole caufield#trevor zegras#jamie drysdale#dylan duke#mark estapa#mackie samoskevich#ethan edwards#adam fantilli#rutger mcgroarty#luca fantilli
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bento box
part one ♡ part two ♡ part four
dedicated to @luverstream
pairings: stalker! mike schmidt x victim! reader
warnings: mike’s a weirdo and a creep wth is he doing here? he doesn’t belong here, mentions of pregnancy, it gets kinda cringey at times bc i’m silly, he jacks off, idk LOL
a/n: sup ladies i hope u likey
♡ when mike came home, all he could think about was you. of course, you're all he thinks about, but he finally felt your lips on his cheek. your lips.
♡ even after jacking off in the mall bathroom, his cock stayed hard. his face flushed from not being able to stop thinking about your praise and lips. he left work early, complaining about how "sick" he felt to his boss. poor mikey, such a lovesick boy. he pathetically thrusted into the mattress, still in his uniform. excess amounts of precum leaked out of his pretty tip and went through his boxers, leaving a wet spot in his khakis.
♡ "please... hmm... such pretty lips," he whimpered into his pillow as he enjoyed the friction, flipping over to desperately trying to pull up a picture of you on your laptop. palming himself with one hand while the other tried to enter your password, tears pricking from the corner of his eyes from how painful his cock felt.
♡ as soon as he unlocked your laptop, the picture he was looking at earlier was still up. your mouth open, tongue poking out, cum in and around your mouth, your eyes half-opened, and tears trickling down your pretty cheeks. his heart skipped a beat as he came, panting heavily as he gripped his pillows. "fuck, need your lips again," he thought before getting up to clean himself.
♡ his morning was way better than usual. he happily ate his breakfast and scrolled through your laptop, instagram, tumblr... learning more about your sick, pretty head.
♡ ding!
♡ “‘her: you better bring something for him hehehe.’” his heart fluttered. could this be about him? he clicked on the notification.
you: heyyy bae, i just got back from the mall, and guess what?
her: WHATTT? :3
you: ok, ok, so i went to the mall and earrings were in my bag?!? WHICH I SWEAR I DIDNGT PUT IN THERE
her: ok...
you: STFU ANYWAYYYY!!! the alarm went off and this ASSHOLE accused me of stealing and i think he was gonna call the cops but then this CUTESTSTTS guy ever in the world saved me from him :000
i think i'm crushing.
her: did you get his number omg INDJNDJNAKJD
you: hehrheh .,DIJNDIOIK he asked for mine!!!!
her: :0000 he likes youuuuuu
you: i know and i kissed him on the cheek and he was blushing????????? today imma go to the mall again and LOOK 4 HIM he's so cute 😭
her: u better bring something for him hehehe
you: ur so right wtf do i bring
her: :00000 you should bring him food!!!
you: YESYYEYS OK ok imma make something i love u
her: i love you too, bestie <3
♡ mike got up from his seat, mouth agape... you think he's cute? he ran to the bathroom and washed his face, shaved, trying to make himself look presentable. running his fingers through his curls, putting on lip balm, brushing his teeth for an extra long time, even flossing!! his dream girl actually likes him..
♡ he took out his uniform and ironed out the wrinkles, making sure everything was amazing. he wanted to look perfect for you. he put on cologne before leaving for work.
♡ you excitedly held a bento box. inside was homemade fried rice, salad, and a cupcake. peeking around the mall, you find mike sitting at the food court. he was on his phone, checking your location and wondering why he hadn't seen you yet. he put his phone away in frustration before looking up and meeting your eyes, a blush crept on your cheek. he must think you're a creep! staring at him from afar…
♡ "hey, mikey! i was hoping to bump into you..." you shyly make your way to his table, sitting in front of him. how the fuck is he making you nervous? you've met actual scary men, and this is who's making you avoid eye contact? blushing?!?! who does this man think he is?
♡ "i didn't expect to see you so soon, y/n," mike smiled, and god was he beautiful. you were so mesmerized by how pretty he looked that you didn't notice him saying your name despite not giving it to him.
♡ "hmmm, i just wanted to say thank you for yesterday." you pushed the bento box closer to him. "i made you lunch... i'm sorry if you don't like it, i just didn't know what you liked, and i-"
♡ "thank you. genuinely," he cuts you off, practically killing you with his perfect smile. "it's my fault, i should've texted you, don't worry." his words felt so comforting to you. he knew how all the men treated you before, but he’s different. he knows everything you like, how you want to be treated, your love language, how fragile you are..
♡ he started unwrapping the bow, his heart thumping so loud, trying so hard not to shake, feeling his face warm up as he tried not to seem like a loser. the poor boy was so busy after you left, collapsing into bed as soon as he came home beforejackingofftoyou. by the time it was morning, he had no idea what to text you. ‘sorry it was a busy day’??? ‘i love you and i wish we could be together 24/7’ too creepy!
♡ "n-no!" you cough, feeling embarrassed for stuttering, "don't be sorry, you literally saved me from going to jail."
♡ “jail? probably a warning at most!” he chuckled softly. the conversation went back and forth for a while… they tried so desperately to put the blame on themselves.
♡ "ok! shut up and eat your food, mr. security man!" you teased him while smiling, and he felt like he died. he yearned for this for months, and he finally felt it. the butterflies in his stomach turning into hawks, the chance of becoming your lover becoming even more realistic.
♡ "ok, ok, ok!" he opened the box and gasped, "is this really for me?" he looked into your eyes with an appreciative smile.
♡ "yes, silly!" you giggled as you picked up his spoon, scooping some rice into his mouth excitedly. it didn’t even fully go down his throat before you asked, "do you like it?!"
♡ smiling as he swallowed, loving how eager you were to please him.. he felt so grateful for this moment. “of course i do. thank you again, seriously.” as his lunch continued, he kept offering you bites. you kept refusing but when he got to the cupcake, he split it and forced it into your hand. as you two ate, you guys talked and got to know more about each other. well, you got to know more about mike. mike already knew almost everything about you, silly!
♡ "hold on, stay still..." he wiped the side of your mouth with his thumb, taking a crumb off your face.
♡ you weren't used to this type of intimacy. usually, guys would've already tried to sneak their hand up your skirt, but he actually cared about you. he listened, showed compassion when you told him stories about your life, waited for your approval before touching you... "i could've gotten a napkin!" you squeaked as you covered your mouth in embarrassment.
♡ "so? it would've been easier for me to do it instead of you blindly cleaning your face, dummy.” his genuine smile. the crinkles beside his eyes. the shine in his white teeth. his rosy cheeks. his stubble. you felt like there was a frog in your throat, having no idea how to respond because you were in such a gaze.
♡ his smile disappeared and was replaced with a concerned look, “are you okay?”
♡ “yeah!” you eat the rest of the cupcake awkwardly, “you know, i have more at my place i made, like.. 12 of them..”
♡ “oh, really?” he smiles teasingly, knowing what’s coming next.
♡ “mhm, do you maybe.. wanna-”
♡ “yes. when?”
♡ “right now.”
♡ as you two walked out of the mall, he quickly texted his boss telling him he was sick again. there must be a virus going around... a loveeeeee virus!
♡ he shut the door and barely had time to turn back to you before you pulled him into a kiss, he moaned as he tasted your cherry flavored lip gloss. his hands held onto your waist, his stubble giving the best burn against your cheek, his tongue slipping in and tasting more of you.
♡ you led him to your bedroom, holding yourself up on your bed with your elbows as he took off his shirt, his warmth surrounding you again as he laid on you before-
♡ “wait- stop- i’m sorry..” you covered yourself with your blanket, and he moved to the edge of your bed. reminding yourself that you were pregnant… and that you actually liked mike. he wasn’t like anyone you’ve ever met.
♡ “are you okay? i’m sorry if i hurt you-”
♡ “no no, it’s not your fault, i just..” you buried your face into your hands, “i really like you. usually.. guys would get annoyed at me but you asked if i was okay! and you were so sweet to me at the mall..”
♡ “i mean this in the nicest way possible, you have the lowest standards.”
♡ “shut up!” you threw your teddy bear at him. it was so hard for you two to get comfortable with other people, but it felt so natural right now. like this wasn’t the second time you ever talked to him. he knew exactly what to say and do to make your palms sweat.
♡ “i really like you as well,” he admitted, his cheeks becoming flushed. he LOVED you, but he didn’t want to scare you off...
♡ you leaned in and kissed where the teddy bear hit, his forehead. he could smell your perfume, which made his pretty brain fuzzy. he pulled you into a hug and inhaled the scent of your shampoo, loving everything about you. his arms felt like home. his musk and cologne felt like home. he felt like home. you felt crazy even for thinking he’s so pretty from only knowing him for a day, but it’s true. you were already addicted, but he’s been addicted to you for six months already..
♡ “we can count this as our first date..” you mumbled into his arms, smiling contently as you looked up at him.
♡ “no. i’m taking you on a proper date!” he looked into your eyes. “ will.. you go on a date with me?”
♡ “yes, dummy!”
♡ when he left later in the day, you texted your best friend..
you: i think he’s the one 💗
her: huh?? wtf did i miss
♡ you tell her everything that happened.
her: that’s like the bare minimum LOL i think he’s a maybe.
you: ugh u don’t like anyone thokjdniufniue
her: and rightfully so!! all the men u date r losers…..
you: he’s a cute loser….
her: like the others, right?? 🙄
you: WHATEVER im going on that date with him <333
♡ you swiped off insta and texted mike all night, planning your date for tomorrow!!
a/n: haiii!! this is longer cuz i felt bad for part 2 being lame! gimme date ideas!
#mike schmidt#mike schmidt x reader#mike schmidt x reader smut#josh hutcherson#josh hutcherson fanfic#josh hutcherson x reader
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If you sent in something that is anonymous and requested reader provoking Rafe & then angry fucking, I lost the request but I have written it!!
STFU
Pairing: Rafe Cameron x fem!reader
Warning: 18+ MDNI, rough sex, blowjob, degrading, choking, spitting, hair pulling, smoking weed, not edited
A/N: This is a little short bc i had written about 800 words but then lost the work so i’ve piece together the parts that i liked the most
-
-
“I’ve never met anyone so dumb.” I lifted the joint to my lips and took a deep inhale.
I earned a quiet hazy chuckle from Top and Sarah.
“No literally, who buys a motorcycle when you owe a drug dealer.” I look at Rafe and he was trying not to blow up at me.
“You don’t know shit y/n.” he mumbled out before he brought his mouth to the opening of the bong.
“Only someone that doesn’t know how to deal with money does that. A dumbass.” I teased him, but I made sure not to go too far because the look on his face seems like he wants to drown me right now.
“Shut the fuck up!” he groaned into the night sky, veins on his neck are prominent.
“Not only that, but your daddy had to go and save your ass.” before I was able to get a puff of my joint, I was pulled up by my arm and basically dragged away from the group and towards the house.
Shit, I took it too far.
“Let go of me!” I elbowed Rafe’s chest once we reached the living room of Toppers house.
Rafe was steaming, his eyes dark and his nose flaring. He roughly brought one of his hands to my throat, squeezing enough where so was still able to get air.
“Do you see what bad mouthing can lead to?” he looked down at me, shaking me with his hand around me.
“Oh fuck you.” I spat at him, my saliva landing on his cheek and lips.
He smirked, shaking his head like we was about to lose it.
He brought a finger to his cheek and lips to wipe the saliva off his face, bringing it to his mouth. He hummed at the taste of my saliva.
Before I could say something, he spat on my face.
“I’m gonna fuck that throat of yours until you’re unable to talk.” He pushed me down by my shoulders, eyes trained on me.
My back against the couch and my knees against the wooden floor, his legs trapped me as he quickly unbuckled his belt.
He dropped his pants, and fuck the tent in his boxers was huge.
His fingers weaved through my hair, his grip tight as he forced my face onto his clothed bulge.
“Now, if you throw a fit or even try to tease me. I’ll fucking ruin you.” he teased in a demanding tone, it sent shivers seeing him so dominant.
He pulled down his boxers and with a free hand, he pumped his cock. It was thick, the head was red and was already spilling precum.
He forced his cock into my mouth and down my throat, my eyes turned red as the tears formed and my breathing was constricted.
His hips thrusted into my mouth, my head hitting the back of the couch. He was groaning and god it was beautiful, it was better than porn.
He pulled away from my mouth, his dick bobbing against his shirt clad abs.
“Get on the couch.” he pulled me up by my hair.
“But you sa—“ I rasped out, my throat definitely fucked out.
“Get on the fucking couch!” he yelled causing me to flinch.
I quickly got on the couch and knew what to do. I stripped myself out of my shorts, keeping my underwear and shirt on just how he likes.
I got on my knees and arched my back, my tits pressed against the cushions of the couch.
I can hear his chuckle from above me, I can feel the dip of the couch.
My body jolts at the feeling of his raw cock entering me at an alarming rate, no warning or anything.
“Fuck!” we both moaned out in unison.
His hips were like pistons, going in and out of me. My ass rippled as his hands gripped my hips, most likely leaving two full hand bruises.
“Look at you. You like being treated like my sex doll?” he asked, his jaw clenching down.
I moaned at his words. His sex doll. His.
My walls clenched around him, earning a groan from his throat.
With a few last pumps, he pulled out and spilled his cum on my ass. Both our body’s limp.
His fingers collected his cum from my skin and slipped in past my lips. My tongue danced between his fingers and I hummed at the taste of him.
He moved his chest against my back, turning my head to face his. He pulled his fingers away from my mouth and brought his lips to mine.
He let out a deep groan.
“How about a ride on my motorcycle to my house?” he asked against my neck.
I hummed in approval.
#gxdsfavgals masterlist#rafe cameron#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron angst#rafe cameron fluff#rafe smut#rafe angst#rafe fluff#obx rafe#rafe obx#drew starkey#drew starkey smut#drew starkey fluff#drew starkey angst#drew starkey fic#obx
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DADDY’S HOMEEEEE PART 2 🙏🏼🙏🏼except this time i’m in astronomical pain. im sliding down the wall… holding my head in misery… pulling my hair out my scalp…. tears rolling down my face…. staring at the wall with nothing but pure agony in my eyes… no words. literally no words. i’ve typed out like three sentences yet i already took 5 breaks already. zadie what THW FUCKKKKKKK🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️ WHAT EVEN IS GOING ON ATP??????????? 1) they fucked AGAIN (EVERYONE ACT SURPRISEDDDD) and hoon was an actual human being this time????? like what??? when the aftercare parts started i literally had to double check whether or not im fr fr reading CH rn or nah because WHAT???
BREAKING NEWS: NEW AND SHOCKING PHENOMENA APPEARS AS THE APPEARANCE OF PARK SUNGHOON FROM ‘COLD HEARTS’ SHOWCASES HIM ACTING LIKE AN ACTUAL HUMAN (HOMOSAPIEN) BEING RATHER THAN HIS DEFAULT BEHAVIOUR OF AN ASSHOLE???????????????????
okay now that that’s out of the way let’s move on to 2) wait first i’ll like to say that i won’t be able to cover up all the events of what happened so im just going to talk about what i can remember rn anywho SO 2)😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 ik damn well u did not just make riki & yn argue 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂if that even counts as an argument or misunderstanding idk but just the fact that they’re not speaking nicely to eachother made me shed a tear. and also whAT THE FUCK???? WHO THE FUCK IS TALKING ABOUT MY GIRL?????????? nah because if this is fuma’s response or anger to yn bailing out on him last minute bcs mister park decided to man up and ask for pussy generously this time then i really hope that fuma gets hit by a basketball square in the face fr 😐 bitchass rat who tf do u think u are to do some shit like that. u and yn DIDNT make ur shit exclusive so what the fuck is ur actual problem ⁉️⁉️ u wanna fight me so bad ooooo u wanna get fucked up 🤼🤼 u wanna get fUCKED UP 🤼🤼🤼🤼🤼🤼🤼🤾🤾🤾🤾🤾🤾🤾🤾🤾PULL UP RN FUMA. PULL UP HOE ‼️‼️ atp with the whole hoon straight up being a munch followed by the double KNOCK OUT DING DING DING🔔🔔🔔 combo of someone snitching on yn + riki getting in a fight— im losing the idgaf war fr 😁😁 i’m genuinely fighting demons & voices rn. i cannot do this bro. i fr thought i was built for zadie angst but gang i cant do this one, im not a fighter im not a survivor im a victim 💔💔 i cant thug this one out bro i genuinely can’t 🤣🙏🏼🙏🏼 how am i supposed to move on from the fact that riki got into an argument with the only family member he still has left because of some bitchass sewage rat. how am i supposed to accept the fact that yn isn’t gonna visit him because she knows he’s angry at her 😂😂😂🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 (im not tearing up dawg there’s just a washing machine in my eyes it’s all good bro dw it’s coo🙏🏼) zadie pls go easy on us i know u said there’s another wave of angst coming but please bro what about my heart what about my artery what about my soul. anyways i’m gen having a headache now so i’ll stfu 🙏🏼
before i end this i just want to say (since i havent sent an ask in so long first of all fuck off to that anon who said ch is boring or smth do me a favour and disappear pls [no i’m just playing] but genuinely it’s not that hard to stop reading smth when u start disliking it 🙏🏼) zadie i genuinely hope that you’re taking care of yourself like fr fr. especially after u stayed up till like what 5 am to write smth first of all let’s get a round of applause for madam zadie come on now 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏mhm 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏i know that’s right 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏now that’s what i’m talking about 👏👏👏👏👏 your dedication and love for the art that u create is genuinely admirable and really shows how much all of this means to you and just honestly thank you so much for dedicating so much energy effort and time of ur days to this work you’re ridiculously talented and the enha community is seriously so lucky to have you zadie :( ilysm thank u sm for sharing ur work and uploading consistently no matter what you’re genuinely so ?????? just an insanely admirable person like ur passion for this is crazy i love it sm and again thank you so much for all ur work and effort, you’ve been putting out banger after banger since hype boy nonstop that’s like an artist dropping an album after an album and all of the songs being number 1 hits material like woah zadie— yk what let’s get another round of applause 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏 there we go 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏exactly👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏 anywho sending u so so so so much love baby !! please take care of yourself and get enough rest and sleep ! sending u so much love and so many hugs & kisses i can’t wait for the new update (but pls rest !!) :DD <333
- ⁉️
omg bABE WAKE UP LOOK WHO SENT ME AN ASK IM GONNA CRYYYYY!!!!!
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU BABY!!!! I really hope you know just how much your asks mean to me, I always find myself rereading them multiple times before answering because of how happy they make me :( I almost deleted this one on desktop I WAS STRESSEDDDDDD</3
now onto the actual reply!
I love how we all collectively suffered when they finally fucked again AND he actually provided aftercare like a decent fucking human being, WE CHEERED, WE CELEBRATED!!!!
WHY DID THOSE LAUGHING EMOJIS MAKE ME CHUCKLE YOU SOUND SO STRESSED IM SO SORRY :(((( I know the nishimura premium sibling argument was painful but iTS FOR THE PLOT I PROMISE IT WILL BE WORTH IT
nOOO i am lock mad at myself for making y'all hate fume so much even if it was only short lived, HES A GOOD MAN SAVANNAH, A GOOD. MAN. I SWEAR
sigh, I genuinely love your asks so much and am just so happy and grateful because they never fail to make my day. you sent me this a few days ago but I still thought about it every day until now bc I was waiting for a moment finally respond to them, so thank YOU so much for all of your kind words and your genuine reactions. I love and appreciate you so much and am so so so grateful for such genuine love and support, you make this experience the best ever, I love you :(❤❤❤
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For the nonnie that was curious about why I don’t like Bernadetta (Marianne will be in another post because this one is pretty long):
I actually suffer from the exact same condition she does and have been diagnosed for agoraphobia. Unfortunately it turns out IS does in fact not know how to write people who are afraid to leave their rooms/houses and makes it seem like we just can't so much as have a conversation with people in person or have to do so from behind a door. People like me can leave our rooms and go out and shit - it's just extremely anxiety ridden.
My biggest issue with Bernadetta is that she's played explicitly for laughs and there's little to no actual tackling of her issues. She screams and runs off because lol funnies, but she also never listens to what anyone says to her and immediately starts insulting herself while ignoring the entire conversation. The thing is, if she were real, I wouldn't even be able to tell her she's wrong about herself because no, she's the most annoying thing on the planet and I found myself agreeing with EdeIgard in their C and B supports when EdeIgard was basically like ffs woman just stfu and actually listen to the conversation instead of making up what's happening.
The whole screaming and running away constantly would need to be removed completely for me to even consider the rest of her character (which is also pretty bland, but when she actually learns how to hold a conversation she's somewhat tolerable). No amount of "oh no Bernie now everyone hates you" is gonna make me like her. In fact, it's true I do hate her because she constantly puts herself down in that specific way, and well... when people do that irl, it's literal manipulation. People want you to say the opposite of the bad things. If that were me, I'd immediately just say yeah, you know what, everyone does hate you because you say shit like that constantly and can't hold a single conversation because uwu your dad was mean to you.
I didn't have the best relationship with my own dad some years ago, and sometimes it was really bad. Neither of us could even hold a conversation because whenever he said anything to me it was some jab at me, and that was during severe mental illness for me. He's learning how mental illness works now, but my relationship with him and somewhat my mom, like Bernadetta, wasn't really good. We were extremely dysfunctional. That didn't make me hide away from every single conversation from all other people though, and her entire character is excessive and beyond unrealistic. Part of it is also the whole "oh no me and my dad had a bad relationship, now I'm going to scream and run away from everyone ever except the avatar character so people can self insert their love for me". zzzzz i sleep
In my opinion too, as someone who suffers from the exact same mental illness, it's actually pretty insulting. The only conversation I have any memory of being able to even remotely tolerate was her and Dorothea's B support. The thing is, she has a story... but it's completely overshadowed by idiocy and the writers being like "lol this must be what agoraphobia is like amirite".
She needs better development and a better delivery of what her story actually is. All her interactions, every single one, are exactly the same. Every. Single. One. Screams, runs away. Does so until the last support with the respective characters and has miniscule growth. Does not have any varied conversations and every single one takes the same outline and hurls back up the same exact thing that happened in the other support. Let me tell you, Fates was infamous for that and my feelings on its supports stand. Bernadetta was like super bad Fates writing on crack, and that's... uh... that's a new low for FE writing lol. Fates had bad writing to begin with.
I know it's also the fact that they took social anxiety and tried it to make it lol funnies bc lol ppl can relate, but like... people who genuinely have that very real issue do not behave like that and to me, it's not funny. It's not cute and "uwu I just want to protect her." It's just extremely annoying and irritating and in fact, I just want to slap her square in the face and tell her to never open her mouth again because HOOEE. There's a big difference between having a mental illness and being outright annoying to everyone you speak to, and having a mental illness doesn't excuse particular socially damaging (to others) behaviors.
Like... I hate her with a fiery hot burning passion when I actually think about the way they handled her in Houses. She's pretty barely above Edelgard in that sense.
As far as more on why I don’t like her, I did mention a lot of it in these posts which explained why the topic itself is so problematic in how it was written.
Hopes:
Regarding Hopes, they actually did remove some of that nonsense as far as the main story. She was quieter and could handle being out in the war (at least while having Ferdinand at her side which yes, that can be realistic! Having a friend with you when you have to go out and you're anxious to go out can really help). Her supports are still absolute trash and should be in the dumpster instead of all the useful things you can find dumpster diving in business' dumpsters, but the main story severely toned down the bullshit.
Her supports are still infuriating (besides with Marianne), but luckily she doesn't have as many in Hopes since supports were less of a feature in the game overall. They were better... somewhat... but not great. Her support with Marianne is essentially the character we should have gotten as her whole character when she associates with anyone at all, because just because she had a rocky relationship with her dad doesn't mean she should look at every single human being ever and fear the things she feared from her dad. What happened with her and her dad doesn't mean everyone is her dad and she should realistically know that. Even if she has a hard time coming out of her shell, she should still do that, slowly learning about people but quickly realizing, based on the amount of people she can meet in GM, that nobody is like her dad.
Ironically the C and B supports she had with EdeIgard were pretty much me letting my emotions out somewhat through EdeIgard lol.
Like you said, the writers handle Bernadetta like a joke character and tbh, I'm frankly disgusted by her popularity as someone who now has to acknowledge that the fandom at large treats my mental illness and anxiety as a lol funny joke. It's crippling and it's why I can barely function outside of my house, and it's certainly not something to laugh about when it causes struggles getting a job because most jobs are, and have been entirely until recently, jobs that you had to leave home to get to. Even online/office jobs were in a location outside of one's home. The fact that the fandom completely feeds into this joke writing means they enjoy it and have only proved the writers correct that anxiety is a joke worth laughing at if you struggle to leave your house.
The representation part of it:
In other words, when anxiety gets that bad, it can be played for laughs and people will enjoy it in media. The problem with that is exactly the same as older media concerns, like showing deeply autistic characters (ex. ones who have warped facial features due to their autism) and shaming them for "being ugly" or otherwise facially abnormal. Another example, media's habit of fat shaming and making fat characters to have them be a fat joke. Berandetta is exactly those things, just with another skin of socially abnormal and neurodivergent behavior being laughed at because it's not "socially normal or acceptable irl".
A perfect example would be unfortunately the Naruto series, that I grew up loving but recently looked back on and saw that a good chunk of it was nothing but cringe. There are literally fat jokes that are so bad in the sequel series, Boruto, that an overweight character literally insults herself with the fat jokes and it’s written to be humor. It's... bad. Bernadetta is literally that, possibly even in a more extreme way.
There’s also the fact that, like I mentioned in one of the linked posts, they give her the very strange interest of “weird plants”, as if to imply they believe shut ins are and do strange things that most people would gawk at, when no, we actually do normal things everyone else does.
I’ve been struggling with this anxiety in a severe way for over five straight years. It’s not funny and we don’t do unusual, abnormal things or have “weird” interests. We also don’t scream and run away from people trying to have a simple, friendly conversation with us. Her self depricating is also ridiculous and we don’t do that out in the open. People like myself tend to only speak to individuals we really trust about those insecurities. While we do have a hard time having any confidence, we don’t just blurt it out and scream it in front of someone mid-conversation. Like I said, people who do that irl are doing it for attention and to get compliments. Having her do that is a very bad look on people who actually have this illness.
Like, I know it seems like I’m making a Big Deal about it, but to me this is no different than people seeing fat jokes played for laughs, or having the token black character who is often the butt of jokes or even just there for the creator(s) to say “there’s a black character so you can’t say we didn’t do it”. It feels like it was just forced in because “it was the new trend online”.
The problem is that people actually ate it up and were happy with “representation”, even if that representation was actually insulting and extremely left field from what the representation is supposed to be like. When creators see incorrect interpretation being lauded as awesome and great, they won’t care if it was well done or not because it sold well and people expressed love for it. Those people not caring about how accurate the representation is is exactly the group of people who are hurting those of us who are trying to get others, and media, to understand that we don’t want that and yes, we want representation, but not for it to be so off par that it’s not even representing at all at that point.
Basically they made both a horribly annoying character and a total failure of a soecial anxiety representation. Like, I don’t even hate Micaiah to this extent and she used to be my most hated FE character until uwugard and Bernadetta happened.
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yk i kinda find it cool how u were able to write y/n from eldia. i remember u telling us on ur ig that y/n from parasite & y/n from eldia were 2 completely diff people and it was significantly harder for u to write eldia y/n but i think that just shows ur versataility as an author n it's really fcking cool. i'm only 18 but someday i wanna write like u bc it's honestly amaaazing how creative ur ideas for stories could be. esp eldia it felt like a movie n parasite was a rollercoaster too
if u dont mind me asking when did u first start writing stories n stuff? or just start writing in general? <33
aw first off thank u so much for recognizing that <3 bc it honestly is ten times harder for me to write eldia than parasite so compliments are gratefully appreciated!! my goal is really to make that shit feel like a movie, i put so much effort into trying to like… help the reader feel like they’re really there in that scene with the characters if that makes sense lol
as for that last part, i used to love reading as a kid like i was a very quiet kid (hard to believe i know i dont stfu now that i gained confidence) and my head was always stuck in a book because i was OBSESSED with disappearing into a made up world just for a moment
i loved reading sm that i started just making my own stories when i was bored with random characters i made in my head & in school when we had writing assignments i would get so happy because i just loved doing it and the fact that i would get really good scores on them was even better (praise kink origin story)
during covid i was really into AOT and i was stuck in quarantine like straight up holed up in my house for a whole ass year,,
i had alot of time to myself and was DEPRESSED over the ending of the aot manga and i gave myself temporary happiness by watching aot junior high but even that ended and i wasn’t quite ready to say goodbye to aot yet
so i was like i’m gonna write a fanfic about eren cause why not and it’s not like anyone is gonna read it so i can make it however i want
….side eye.
eventually parasite blew up which was ??? scary both good and bad, my life definitely changed from it and i was like hey… i’m kinda really good at this ppl actually like my ability to be delusional 😍
and eldia was born shortly after and it’s honestly both a breeze and a challenge to write but it’s my baby atm and i think about it 24/7
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/gen no hate you're ofc allowed to be annoyed by whatever annoys you and yeah yeah 'im built different' Tumblr jokes etc etc but would you mind explaining why you have a problem with people who 'didnt get their hopes up'? As someone on the edges of the fandom who has loved the ship and loved engaging with ship content but hasn't dared hope it'd ever actually happen I don't understand why apparently I'm an annoyance to the point where I need to stfu :( if it goes canon I just want to be able to breathe a sigh of relief and enjoy the fact that for once it wasn't bait and celebrate it and I don't get why that's a bad thing - you guys have more faith than I do and good on you for that but why am I not welcome just because I don't have that trust level :(
If youre constantly making posts saying you dont wanna get your hopes up and tagging them with the main tags aka forcing people see your posts bc you want people to interact or reassure you then yes I’m annoyed and think you should stop (if you post those on your blog and dont tag or have a specific neg. tag people can filter then you do you I have no annoyance toward you)
My biggest thing is when yall say buddie/911 is queerbaiting because THEY ARE NOT. Never once have they used buddie to lure queer viewers in. Plus if you dont care about the other queer and poc rep on the show then yeah im annoyed with you.
911 as a show is so much more than just if these two men are gonna kiss or not. (And I understand loving their relationship bc I do to but most of us would love it whether or not they go canon)
Also most of the people who say they’ve been burned before are talking about one specific show/ship and….im not gonna go into why that’s extra annoying rn
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I wanna go back to sleep and just have a break. I don’t wanna do anything. I’m exhausted. Why am I so unhappy with the choices I’ve made. They’re just unhelpful to me. I actually need to get a fucking grip bc I can’t be bothered to hear myself be upset by this any longer. Like come on, at a certain point just fucking stfu and do something about
Not that I’m not doing something about it. I am. I’m just riddled with anxiety that I have to pretend doesn’t exist so that everyone thinks I have it all together bc I’m supposed to be reliable but my reliability is wavering since I can’t even breathe for myself let alone think. I can’t be like this. I need to change my mindset immediately.
In my dreams I got to cut myself a lot. I woke up with a feeling of something missing. It is the cuts on my arm that are missing. And I want them. And I can have them if I wanted. What do I do. If I’m gonna do it then now would be the right time. Bc I have no obligations. My exams are in two weeks so it’s not like it’ll hinder my exams as I’ll be able to use my hand again properly by then. Maybe I’ll just do it tonight. Get the urge out.
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I ain't scared, I just thought I might get the most best answer this way..I'm wondering what poet or poem you read (or were read in your childhood) that had you looking for more and aspiring to write your own? If it was a traumatic event, I feel you there. .it can really help to read a complete stranger's words of pain, when they harmonize with our own. I admit, I have only read a couple of your poems but I love your voice, keep on keepin on ☮️ 🕉 💛
HAHA DW I LOVE ANONS <33333 I encourage it.
HONESTLY no poetry inspired me to write poetry (IRONIC) I thought I hated poetry!!!! I’ve written many things since I was a kid but always been more of an essay kinda dude..I attempted to read poetry a few times over my lifetime and mostly it made no sense to me..I thought it was just a bunch of pretentious ppl flexing their advanced vocab (which honestly I lack bc of a whole other story I won’t get into and maybe I was just jealous) - the only time I wrote a poem was back in final yr of highschool lit class when my brain was malnourished af and writing it made me want to kms plus I had major imposter syndrome (and then my lovely grandma went and sent it in to a poetry magazine without me knowing and it got published and still I didn’t think poetry was for me) only in more recent times I no longer have access to a psych who I can send weekly 3000 word emails to and I needed to do something so that I would stop driving myself completely insane bc I also live alone 4hrs from family and no friends so have noone to save me but myself so I started writing every day on wattpad like a digital diary entry(today was day 118 in a row) then I started to see others who had written poetry and combined w the fact that I’ve come very far over the yrs in terms with perfectionism (as in not needing to be) I found myself in a place realising that poetry didn’t have to be “good” and that I could just make it work for me. I could just write for myself. To get things out (even tho it’s only like 5% of my mind). It didn’t need to look impressive for others etc like what I used to think poetry did… so yeah basically poetry is just my budget therapy now and a tool to prevent me from ending things :))))) everything I write about (so far, at time of writing) is from real life experience and I love using it as an outlet to say the things that wouldn’t be taken so well if they were said out loud.. cause everyone has some sort of darker side whether they are exposed to it or not and whilst I do hold onto a lot of hope I love being able to have an outlet to get the rot out of me or at least create something with it so it’s not completely useless and all consuming. ALSO I think it’s cool that poetry allows you to turn your words into art. I’ve always loved art and ppl consider me arty or whatevs but I can’t draw or paint (well - not that it matters) so this is kinda something that comes more naturally to me! (I’ve only been writing poetry for 4 months now so hopefully I can only get better)… AND THANK THE LORD in the meantime as I have come to write my own poetry I am now able to appreciate other people’s poetry, I can understand it more, I can be inspired by it, I can admire it. I get it now. Or at least I think I’m starting to get it…. But to answer ur question l wouldn’t say it was a singular traumatic event which inspired it but rather a combined experience of like 20 genuinely traumatic events combined with being neurodiverse & a lifetime of various mental illnesses which I wouldn’t say are all treated etc. and quite honestly having read NOTHING in the past which resonated with the depth of my own experience so I thought you know what I know I can’t be the only one feeling this, I’m gonna try write my own! If I can’t read it I’ll write it and hope I can be that for someone else I guessss
SOZ FOR RANT IDK HOW TO STFU AND THANK YOU FOR READING A FEW OF MY POEMS AND THANK YOU FOR THIS QUESTION ILY HAVE A LOVELY DAY <33
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songs I’ve been relating to lately? yeah
just. the whole entire concept of it. this ain’t even something i relate to rn necessarily but just in general
girls who can’t move on rise up! 🤠
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“casual’s the way you chose to leave” had me wake up in a sweat last night and kept me up, btw. like. fuck that line !
———
“bet you rue the day you kissed a writer in the dark”
“now she’s gonna play and sing and lock you in her heart”
“I am my mother’s child I’ll love you till my breathing stops”
will never not relate to those lyrics. ever.
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“breaking my heart ‘tis the season i guess” . pretty much
why is this song only 2 minutes. criminal
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yeah i’m still on this bc genuinely the second verse fucks me up and the rise to the bridge and not being able to let go. “i fantasize about a time you’re a little fucking sorry” hits every time. “and i know in my heart, hurt people hurt people, and we both drew blood but man those cuts were never equal”
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“i’m in a winter mood dreaming of spring now” just a whole december vibe ig idk it was a sucky month. but also just the entirety of the song. any excuse i have to mention this song I WILL TAKE IT
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“they don’t want to celebrate” “the same excuses from every friend” me trying to get my friends to spend the holidays or literally any occasion together and getting ghosted 🤘
“always the month when parties come to an end” not the same bc he’s born in february i think cause he’s an aquarius (🙄) right
but legit how i feel on my bday cause it always falls around midterms or whatever or busy times at work so no one has time for me lol
“nobody cares this is the day i was born, another birthday alone” nuff said anyways it hasn’t been my birthday for two months i need to stfu
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“didn’t know you need a motive to keep a friend around, to find a boyfriend who doesn’t mess around” 🙂🙂
more tate bc she’s been on repeat fr
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criminally criminally underrated
“my whole life story i’ve gotta re-tell to somebody else” no cause this is my first thought after a breakup. or rather my biggest fear when parting ways
“i’m still processing that we’re done” lmao bitch me still processing that i’m not in high school anymore. try telling my dreams that
anyway no cause this song revived my love for music at a time (couple weeks ago) when everything was sounding so bland and tasteless to me. and this album came out and i was like oH. I REMEMBER NOW. I’m alive
“you showed me how to take all of my pain, give it another name” is so beautiful
———
ending on a hopeful note because who am i if not a sucker for a poetic outlook on life. his songs feel like a hug
“whoever you are, whatever it is, you’re gonna find it”
#i need to geek out abt music for a minute#because it's been!! a minute!!#i just haven't enjoyed much lately#and like i miss camila so much but the stuff she's teasing isn't speaking to my heart#i'm still sooooo excited for her comeback next year but also terrified#i'm not gonna like the new stuff & that it won't be worth the wait#and that she won't tour or that she will but won't come back#or that she does have a show here but i can't get tickets.......#idk i don't wanna think that far ahead anyway#and i also miss tøp ofc but who tf knows what the new stuff will sound like#and are they even coming back in 2024? literally who knows anything#tyler's focused on his third kid ig and i don't want a SAI 2.0 tbh so like#idk man like when my own faves aren't bringing me joy? it's bad#i haven't enjoyed a single the maine album since YOA#and even that one isn't .. a fav. to say the least#idkkkk i just want heart wrenching music again. i wanna feel everything in my core#nothing's doing it for me anymore#i overplayed the heck out of patrick’s music#i need like. a new melodrama album yk#ugh anyway it’s almost 2am and i’m going crazy a little#music#**
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anywayyyy journal rant
i truly do hate the “it gets better” thing. i stay on my it gets worse bs. bc it does. it’s so big and vague i kinda don’t give a shit sometimes if like damn i have adult money now unlike before but also a hundred things are unimaginably worse than i expected them to be so like how much is supposed to get better??
i always think about a post on here that’s like i was gonna kms but now my partner is making pancakes for me and like, im tumblr brained, i couldn’t find one nice thing to say about it. like, all i have to look forward to is a live in partner? like, im suicidal about people not being able to stand me and im supposed to look forward to someone living with me? i am emotionally unable to conjure up anything about that. it’s not happening. that shit you said just made me worse, personally.
i’m glad that person felt some sorta way but i think it sticks with me because like, i feel like i should relate to you bc you said you think like me, but you missed the mark that hard? not that i know this person and not that they know me.
it’s just so bleak and terrible to me that, just according to this one person so now it’s all i can see, the only way things could get better is if i settle into complete normalcy and don’t push myself to do things i’ve always wanted to do like leave the country.
it’s a therapy goal for me now so i’m in a different spot. things you think are impossible will feel and be possible and happen one day means sm more to me than, “it gets better.” ik it’s like, an extremely watered down version of what i just said, but that’s the problem exactly.
it will be terrible and horrible the whole time and i will still break down and even embarrass myself breaking down hundred more times before i die. but, things that matter a lot to me will happen too. it’ll be hard the whole time i’m getting “better” and i’ll have to get better forever. so long as i don’t die i’ll do something that matters to me.
i’m trying to wrap up but like, idk what it is about deciding to share my life with someone just doesn’t register as an accomplishment, even despite the fact i’m convinced i’m an inhuman monster that needs to learn how to do that harder than humans do. even if i did do that i could never accomplish it. it’s not something that would make me better.
i want to grow so much that i go out and i do things and i meet so many people and i learn things like how to take a train for myself. being next to someone is not at all the same as missing your train. arguing with someone isn’t the same as missing your train, adjusting your ticket, and doing it right the next day. as much as my position and i get better, i will never trust another person to make me feel accomplished. i’m locked in.
anyway the world is burning down so idk how i’ve never seen someone else be like hey stfu,,,,, is it bc that would basically be like saying kill yourself? idk man.
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I JUST FOUGHT THE RAIDEN SHOGUN AGAIN AND IM HERE TO RELAY MY EXPERIENCE
okay FIRST OF ALL this bitch had the AUDACITY to let me off promising me to live AND THEN SHE ATTACKED ME ?? FROM BEHIND ???????? and then kazuha saved me HE WAS SOOOOO HOT IN THAT and the empty vision RELIT I WAS LIKE :O
BUT THEN SHE WAS BEATING MY ASS SO HARD I WAS LIKE :O THERES NO WAY IM GONNA WIN THIS WHAT NOW ?????????
but then yae miko showed up bc she’s so slay and then not much rly changed she was still beating my ass but they gave me my bursts a lot quicker i think so i was able to manage THANK GOD FOR BARBARA FKSKFJE otherwise i’d be toast LMAO and then we spoke civilly and that was nice and i saved the ppls ambitions and visions
BUT THEN PAIMONS STUPID ASS WAS LIKE “maybe yae miko wants to thank US”
BITCH U DO NOTHING BUT FUCKING FLOAT I WAS THE ONE WHO GOT MY ASS BEAT TF ARE U TALKING ABOUT ??? THANK US ??????? YOU MEAN THANK ME ???????? as far as i’m concerned i’m the only one to thank i got my ass on the line 24/7 while all u do is float and REPEAT SHIT. STFU BEFORE I EAT YOU
anyway yeah that was my reaction that sucked but the cutscene was nice and yeah i’m struggling but imma keep playing nfjsjfjsjf
TEE IM CRYING THIS ASK IS SUCH A ROLLERCOASTER i loveee HELLO THANK U FOR UPDATING ME <333 LFKJHASJSF fun fact i have forgotten about all of this LMAO (in a few months u will forget everything too tbh this game is a fever dream ALKSJD) I AM SO PROUD OF U FOR DEFEATING HER!!! (good god wait until u get to the fucking inazuma tumor boss world quest... pure pain and misery)
thank god i had zhongli when i did that quest because without his shield i would have never survived shit with my shitty builds (at the time) kjhsdks
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Am officially registered for winter semester 😗✌️ I wasn’t paying that much attention to it so hopefully my brain last night made good class choices 😂
#had to do it during class bc thats I guess like when I would be first able to register for classes#and I was paranoid about all the classes I wanted closing if I had to wait until I got out of class lol#idk I don’t think any of what I just said makes sense but oh well no one cares lmao anyway#in complete other news idk what I’m gonna write for the advent prompt today#and I also basically have zoom meetings until idek when#just got out of 10-11:30 class#I have class from 12-1 a group project meeting at 1#another class 3-4#and a group homework meeting at 4 🥴#my schedule next semester is looking a lot heavier for the first half the week I’m gonna have to get used to that lol#bc this semester has been the opposite I’m super busy on fridays and only have one class on mondays#why am I rambling skdhdjdjs#also my phone has started autocorrecting keyboard smashes lmao#stfu jeanne
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I’m getting nervous for Easter…
We’re celebrating 4 birthdays on top of Easter itself
With my family ik there’s going to be 4 different cakes and all the comments of me needing to eat more and how I eat like a bird
Either I’m gonna not want anything there (bc they always make gross food) or someone is gonna force me to eat something, or I’ll eat more sweets and then feel like shit bc high calories and I wish I had the mindset of “birthday calories don’t count” or “holiday calories don’t count” bc to me they do, I have to get down to the T what I eat, and not being able to weigh or know what’s gonna be in the food is FRIGHTENING!! I’m definitely only doing water for my drink, but I’m so nervous about hidden calories (butter, oil, lard etc.)
I also HATE eating around other people, hearing the sounds, people watching me eat, feeling judged, people being mad at me for “being picky” when in reality these are the hardest damn days right next to weekends food wise, they’re all so judgmental
But one thing I WILL eat if it’s there… my grandmas German potato salad🥴
But again guys I’m so scared and if you guys have any tips on how to deal with judgement… because I can’t skip this sadly, and idk if my boyfriend will be able to go and he’s my biggest support with guilt even if he doesn’t know how to help much
Like should I bring distractions (coloring, reading, journaling) bc my uncle hates when we have phones out but it’s literally my only distraction from eating
And do I just let myself indulge? Bc this only comes once a year and an 18th birthday only happens once, so do I deal with the guilt or do I play it safe? Like it all depends what food is there too
Holidays once again are always miserable to me, I almost always end up crying or having a panic attack
It’s only a couple weeks away and Ik I should take my time to each day but days like this i need to prepare myself
Like how tf am I gonna guess with my calories?? Like Ik this may sound messed up of me but on the day, would anyone want to help? I’ll send you my plate with approx measurements and what the food is, this is obviously if I decide to be careful or not of what I eat, I just seriously can’t go a day without counting at least something
I’m sorry this is a huge ramble and I’m sick so I may not make literally any sense bc I have double brain fog it seems
Like I already know everything will tell me restrict before and after and slightly restrict at the meals and make the dine er and dessert the only times I eat, but no matter how much I restrict beforehand I never feel like I restricted enough to “deserve” the food on Easter
Also they make ham at Easter and I despise ham, ever since I was a kid I’ve hated ham, still do to this day
My family is very white so the food is gross- for example cranberry stuffing casserole
WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE A CASSEROLE????
On the other hand sometimes they make good appetizers, except last get together when we watched Christmas movies… my uncle made “pizza” on an English muffin (I hate English muffins, it’s a texture thing)
Omg stfu. Here I am rambling again, nobody asked about my goddamn uncles poverty pizzas
I should probably go to bed
Side note: I play clash of clans, I’m gonna be town hall 6 tomorrow, I made a second account like 2 weeks ago and I’m almost at town hall 6, so I’m very proud of myself for finding a hyper fixation that makes me feel accomplished:) just like cleaning!
OMG AGAIN I NEED TO SHUT UP
Good night babes!! Remember you are sexy, you are valid, you are a hottie, BUT out of best interest, you should drink more water bc I KNOW you’re dehydrated
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how you meet | edward cullen
A/N: wowowow after being on Tumblr for 6+ years I would have NEVER imagined my first published writing to this site being Twilight dnvjdfjaskdlmfkl enjoy!! requests are open :)) I will write for Twilight (mainly the Olympic Coven, except Jasper romantically), Star Wars, and Harry Potter
Pairing: Edward Cullen x Fem!Reader
Category: Fluff
Content Warnings: Reader gets unsolicited attention from teenage boys, swear words
when you moved to forks after spring break because of your dad’s work, you’re unanimously nicknamed new girl™ by all of forks high school’s students
and consequently, you’re the new eye candy for your male peers
Forks boys are, well . . . neanderthals douchebags
the ones you’ve met are egotistical, super immature, and super HORNY
. . . you decide to keep your distance
aNyWaYs
you get smooshed into ap u.s. history
apush, baby, apush HAAAAA
the teacher points you to an empty seat next to some pale blonde dude
he gives off weird kid energy at first but then he politely speaks to you
“i’m jasper. welcome to forks” and gives you an acknowledging nod
his eyes are topaz!!!?? woooooooah that’s so cool is that like a genetic defect or smth??
aaaaand your teacher immediately assigns a PROJECT
a fuckin civil war project
you swear you see jasper’s pupils dilate
you hear a chuckle from behind you
and when you turn around you see a pale dude w a dark brown buzzcut and some blonde girl smirking beside him
you later find out that those are his siblings
his fuckin goofy ass siblings
anyways a few weeks pass
you pop in at your dad’s job @ forks hospital and see him chatting w a fellow physician
yet another pale dude with blonde hair
JESUS HOW FUCKING MANY ARE THERE
you approach them and your dad embraces you in a hug
“heeeeyyyy sweet pea! how’s it goin’!”
the doctor he was talking to looks at you fondly
“hello, i’m carlisle cullen” and offers you his hand to shake, which you do
“y/n, carlisle was just inviting us to his house later tonight for some dinner”
dr. hotpants puts his hands in his pockets and humbly grins
“my son jasper tells me you’re his classmate”
oh god he’s one of those pta dads, isn’t he??
“oh, yeah, he’s my partner in history”
he smiles, “that’s wonderful. my wife esme and i would love to have you both over as our guests. it’s not often we have company for dinner. and i’m sure the rest of my children would love to meet you, y/n”
jesus christ how many kids does this guy have?? he looks THIRTY
don’t worry, in the car your dad tells you they’re all adopted lmfao
✰✰later that night✰✰
their house is HUGE jesus fuckin christ
alice knows (well they all know) about you because of jasper
IMMEDIATELY loves you!!
“hi! i’m alice!!!”
WHOLESOME AS FUCK UGH
i’m EVAPORATING. i’m YODELLING. it’s fine :-)
you thought you weren’t gonna make any pals in forks bc of the weird horny teenage specimens but here we are ;-;
alice envelopes you into a tight hug and you, in shock, grasp her arms to acknowledge this affection
your dad’s chillin near carlisle and esme and he’s silently chuckling
oh . . . they all have black eyes now?? must be the weather
or the fluorescence
you wave at jasper, rosalie, and emmett
you notice the last sibling
he’s very handsome
to you, everything about him was attractive
his soft hair contrasted against his hardened facial features
you could tell he was socially reserved when it comes to new acquaintances, just like you
he physically isolates himself from his family once you and your dad arrived
he was standing alone near a corner away from everyone else
you make eye contact with him and his mental barrier breaks down
he loses his cool
his face contorts
his lips twist into puckered lines
he claps his hand over his mouth and vacates the room immediately, running up the stairs
everyone notices his sudden departure
his family is shocked but tbh not really
✰✰✰ eddy boy is a lil shy around girls sometimes ✰✰✰
carlisle breaks the impending doom of silence
“i apologize for edward leaving us so abruptly. he hasn’t been feeling well as of late; please excuse his absence. . .”
you awkwardly pretend like that never happened
you feel it in your gut that your presence disturbed him
and not only did you disturb him
but you disturbed him so bad that he had to leave
for why?? you don’t know
you then realize that everyone else in the room knows he left bc of you
. . . anyway you all sit down at the table but you and your dad are the only ones who have plates
your dad notices this too
“hey, aren’t you guys gonna eat too?”
esme grins warmly at him
“oh, don’t worry about us. we just wanted to welcome you to town!”
uhhh, ok ma’am
alice talks to you for almost the entire time you were eating ;-; i love her
you’re also talking to jasper, cracking some apush jokes
you, jasper, emmett, and rosalie talk shit about your classmates and teacher
“why the fuck -- *carlisle glares at emmett* -- heck did mr. whatshisface give us a project RIGHT AFTER BREAK???!!”
“and he paired y/n and jasper!! they’re civil war n e r d s!! they’re gonna get the best grade” rosalie chimes in
“not if we--”
alice ❀politely❀ tells them to stfu
you giggle
bonding with your new pals <33
allllllright so it’s a few days later
you’re walking home from school
it’s drizzling, as always, but you know that it’s gonna rain harder if you don’t get home fast enough
and some asshole
some persistent prick from your class
keeps flirting with you
he’s talking about how he hasn’t been able to take his eyes off of you since you came to forks
he’s insisting he has your phone number, that he’s gonna take you out on dates. . .
you hate it
you’re so uncomfortable but you can’t really do anything about it
s u d d e n l y
a car pulls up beside where you and the guy are walking on the sidewalk and screeches to a stop
the window is rolled down and you see a familiar face
it’s edward cullen
with one hand on the wheel, he looks at both of you and clenches his jaw
“get in”
even though he was undeniably weird a few weeks ago, you concede
you never got to speak to him, but you knew that edward was trustworthy
you practically launch yourself into his silver volvo c30™
he shoots a stone-cold glare to the jackass on the sidewalk and drives away
honestly, it wouldn’t take much for anyone (not just a mind-reading vampire) to know how uncomfortable you are after what just happened with that guy
your body language is tense
your arms are crossed tightly
your body is pointed towards the passenger window as your knees touch the door
tears are welling up in your eyes
it would be mere seconds until you fully broke down
you’re embarrassed, to say the least
you’re embarrassed that you were put in a vulnerable situation, like a damsel in distress
and of all people, the handsome and mysterious guy--
the handsome and mysterious guy you began crushing on
--who feels seemingly indifferent towards you swept you off your feet and helped you when you needed someone
that made things even more embarrassing
and the tears started streaming down your heated cheeks
edward immediately sensed your unease (hmm wonder why, but also who wouldn’t sense it???)
he’s pissed.
absolutely livid
that asshole had a d e a t h w i s h
he knew you didn’t want to address your unsolicited encounter, so . . .
*awkwardly clears throat* “are you enjoying the weather?”
you choked
you did not expect him to ask that
nor did you expect him to talk at. all.
you smile through your tears and laugh
you can’t help but laugh
he’s just so awkward and cute
his half-baked plan of indirectly distracting you definitely worked
you started to excitedly talk about the rain and how much you love gloomy, cloudy days
. . . and then the elephant in the room
the inevitable first impression from a few days ago
“i’m sorry for my behavior from our first meeting. i wasn’t feeling well, and i wouldn’t have wanted for you or your father to be affected by my illness”
you’re a little skeptical at first
buuuuut you give him the benefit of the doubt and dismiss his apology
“that’s okay. it’s allergy season, anyway. i’m glad you’re feeling better”
you have no idea how bad i wanted to make a spanish flu joke right there
a small, soft smile lifts the corners of his lips “i’m edward cullen”
you look at him and return the smile
t h e t e a s i n g e n e r g y
“i’m y/n”
the car approaches your house after time seems to have flown by
your dad looks at you both as he walks to his car to go to work
he waves at edward
edward smiles and waves back at him as he enters the car
you gratefully thank edward for the ride, careful not to dwell on the prior circumstances
as you open the passenger door, edward grabs your wrist
!!he grabs your wrist!!
he insists on being your ride to and from school from now on
you object and exit the car
but
b u t
edward smirks, leaning towards the open door
“i’ll see you in the morning, y/n”
your jaw drops
and then he closes the door and speeds off
you watch him drive away and your heartbeat becomes arrhythmic
a garden of butterflies is unleashed in your stomach
blood rushes to your cheeks once more
you smile to yourself before heading inside
secretly anticipating tomorrow morning :’)
#edward cullen#edward cullen x reader#edward cullen imagine#twilight#twilight imagine#edward cullen headcanons#twilight headcanons#edward cullen imagines#headcanons
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