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lonebanshee · 8 years

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New Years Hell

((A small note about this. I’m having horrible anxiety, and dark depression, and felt that writing about this situation might be a small comfort. I think I’m an awful awful writer, and this is quite long. Frankly, you deserve an award if you make it through this, but I do appreciate the time.

Feel free to share, if you find it interesting, as I, quite pathetically, am very lonely, and would appreciate any attention.

There is a potential second part to this I may write up talking about where my head has been this entire time, and possibly about my anxiety/depression in general. At any rate, thanks for the time, and sorry for the mess.))

-New Years Hell-

It’s New Years Eve night, and it’s a night like any other. I’ve never thought much about New Years. Hell, I don’t think much of any holiday, really. They are, again, a day, or night like any other. Except this night. No, this night was different.

I probably awoke late in the day, around 3-5PM. Weird, I know, but from my early childhood to now, the time of day I sleep flips around every few weeks. I’ve never been capable of sticking to a regular schedule, whatever the reason. At any rate, perhaps I had a small meal, or maybe I skipped one. In the long run, it’s a fairly insignificant point, but something my mind dwells on in the interim.

I played some games, read my typical share of useless social media fluff, and treated the day with the same shrug I did every day. It was a regular day, so bullshitting in my room was literally the top, and only priority. The only potential annoyance in my day I could foresee, was the possible screaming of drunks, shooting fireworks in celebration of the glorious New Year!

It was later into the night I found myself actually becoming fairly engrossed in a game, and it took my attention, sitting at my computer, through most of the night. It was actually looking to be a fairly enjoyable day, which, somewhat depressingly, isn’t the norm. Regardless, the night had more of a joy to it then usual.

Some hours passed, and fatigue was beginning to hit me, so I prepared for bed. As usual, I checked on my Grandma, possibly got her some ice and water, and laid into my bed. It wasn’t a comfortable bed, necessarily, but it may as well have been a cloud in the sky, in retrospect. There was typical comfort in my bed, though, that in these following days I’ve missed ever so.

Relative comfort aside, sleep didn’t come immediately. No, it never really has for me, no matter how absolutely pooped I am. Much as I’d like to say “I sensed something that night, Agnes, I’m telling you!”, I seem to always wake up, to some degree, when my head hits my pillow. That night was no different in that regard, so I once again read some social media postings on my tablet, waiting until the sleep ultimately took me.

In the darkness of my room, I saw a bright light through my window. Strange, I thought, but I lived in an incredibly tiny town, and it wasn’t really uncommon at night to see a few policeman, or volunteers, poking around town with spotlights, shall we say, ‘keeping the peace’. Sure. The light was not just passing, though, so my curiosity overtook me, and I had to peak out my bedside window.

As I had assumed, there was a truck pointing a spotlight… but at our house? And they were just sitting out there? Suddenly I’m wary, sure, but am I freaking out? Not really. Again, this tiny town does some strange things at times, in their boredom. I hear my Uncle chatting with my Grandma in the living room, probably also planning to sleep soon. I decide to peak out and mention our spotlight friend outside, and lay back in bed.

No more than thirty seconds to a minute later, I hear my Uncle chatting with someone outside. Briefly, my mind wanders on what this is all about, but I am still not overly worried. Maybe they’re looking for someone, or something - a person or animal. Maybe this is just some confused drunk coming down from New Years night.

I hear my uncle re-enter the house, and I hear him say to my grandma, a sentence I never expected to hear in my life. “He says our house is on fire!” Dread of a level I had never felt in my life washes over me. My grandma yells to me “Antni!”, tries to explain, but I’ve already heard, and I’m stunned, standing in my room.

From there it’s a flash of pure hellish anxiety. I threw our two dogs into cages, and loaded them into our car outside. I grabbed my grandma and helped her to the car. I went and got both our cats and put them into the car with my grandma. One cat was scared, scratched me, and ran back toward the houses porch. I had to chase her down and gently grab her, and get her back to the car. I think she realized this situation was serious, as she calmed quickly when she got into the car.

The entire time this is happening, I see little indication of a fire. There is no strong smell, and I don’t see the house blazing around us. There was a tiny amount of light smoke in the air, sure, but little more than you see in the air regularly this time of year, from typical home heating. Nothing significant, which brought me slight hope this was just a misunderstanding, or not a big deal.

With all of us packed into a car, my uncle parked us at the back of our large yard, as dozens of vehicles began to line our road. The towns siren began blaring, and even more dread filled me, knowing it was because of us, this time.

Myself and my uncle approached a group attempting and failing to get a ladder into our attic. They were bashing the ladder into our screen door, and frankly, doing some Three Stooges shit. I propped our door open, and my uncle attempted to explain the easy way to get a ladder into our attic, as he’d done so himself before. They get pissed at us, and tell us to immediately vacate the premises. My uncle begins screaming and cursing at them, and I decide to go back to the car.

Back in the car, I look and see the two cages stacked on top of each other with our dogs, crying, barking, confused. My grandma is next to them, in the corner with two cats, on each of her shoulders, looking the most terrified I’ve ever seen her. It’s cold, it’s dark, and I’m equally as scared.

The short period following this, dread and anxiety aside, are somewhat uneventful. My uncle stays near the house, and comes back to update us on the apparent idiocy of the people attempting to save our house. Their fire extinguisher is empty. They consider putting a hole in our roof to reach our attic, despite their being vents on both sides with access to it. They screech our power setup is not up to code and must all change. They decide to leave several tanks of oxygen belonging to my grandma in the house.

Much of this period is a blur, as I primarily sat in the car, filled with extreme fear, just waiting for anything to happen. By this point, it was probably near 5-6AM, and I was beyond exhausted, freezing, and bordering on a nervous breakdown. There was, still to this point, no visible sign of a fire, or a large one, at the least. So sprinkle some confusion into all this.

Truth be told, one thing I remember during this period, is how much I felt like a small child wishing their mother would be there for them. Which, of course, ended up becoming another point of anxiety, as my mother finally showed up… and was vaguely buzzed from earlier drinking. Lovely.

Finally, the firemen, and volunteers leave, joking in somewhat poor taste that they had, in their words, “finally saved a house, and not just a lot!”. My heart drops - no doubt by this point sinking deep into the Earth -, and I walk away and sit back in the car.

The situation is laid out to us. A single wire in our attic overheated, sparked, did SOMETHING, and caught a tiny bit of insulation on fire. When Spotlight Man passed, he saw the little smoke, and had he, entirely on a whim, not investigated, our house would have caught fire in minutes. Even better, the location in the attic it would have begun, was directly above my grandmas oxygen tank supply, meaning had the fire spread, it very likely would have dropped down to the tanks, and, well… blown us all to shit. Another words, we were minutes from death.

Our power is entirely disconnected, and we’re told everything has to be replaced. This sucks, but is, obviously, better than the alternative of fucking death. We stay in the house for a day, and because my grandma requires oxygen, are forced to stay at her friends house until we get shit together. My uncle opts to stay at the cold, dark, powerless house with our animals.

That was a week ago, now. Since then, every day has been a horrible disappointment, with more and more problems arising. I have spiraled into some of the darkest depression and anxiety of my life. I have barely eaten in this week, having no appetite, or drive to do so.

We were lucky, yes, but it really doesn’t feel that way.

#story #fire #depression #anxiety #mybadwriting

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0mnitrixter · 11 years

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L'ora dell'eroe rinasce

When Ben arrived at the Dexlabs headquarter, it was already past noon.

He had to leave Edwin alone in the Firepits, just because Dexter wanted to talk to him as soon as possible about an urgent question. Face to face.

But come on! That little genious had, like, 20 robots scattered all around the place, he always declared himself 'busy as hell' and now he wanted to... Well, the sooner he got on that, the sooner he could have come back and fight those dinosaur-like monsters.

Two weeks had passed since the the last time he saw Tech Square; the big solar panels and the fountain in the centre of the square made him smile, thinking about when he and Deedee used to meet there to talk and drink smoothies. He missed his friends.

One of the Dexbots at the entrace drew his attention. "Mister Tennyson, Dexter is waiting for you." he called. Ben sighed and went inside the building.

The indications leaded him in the structure's heart, where Dexter used to conduct his most important experiments alone. Ben remembered that the access was prohibited to everyone. When the huge, metallic doors opened, the boy was surprised to find in front of him not only Dexter... but Azmuth too.

"... I'm in troubles, am I not?" Ben asked, intimidated.

"Not this time." Dexter reassured him, without changing his serious, almost bored usual expression. Ben's eyes passed confused from the human to the galvan many times, until the last one decided to finally speak.

"You, are really silly." What a news. "I trusted you with the most precious device in the Universe and you, like a beginner, let it get stolen and destroyed in front of your eyes. You can just imagine how mad I am with you, Ben Tennyson." Ben sighed, That was the third time he heard that lecture, he was sick of it.

"... but, on the other hand"

What?

"You're the one who made it a peace tool even more functional than what I could ever planned it to be. I won't lie, I still have doubts on the fact Max decided to leave the watch to you but... you saved the entire Universe more than once, restoring peace. People love and respect you for that." and with that, the little alien gave the boy genious an eloquent look. Dexter just ignored it and kept typing on the keyboard behind them.

"This crisis the Earth is facing now already had dire implications in other parts of the Universe. Planet Fuse is a calamity that needs to be stopped as soon as possible, and you were the first ones standing up to its creatures. But at the same time you drew Lord Fuse's attention on yourselves." Azmuth paused, jumping off the platform he was standing on and going near Dexter, on his computer. "We need everyone's help to win, yours too."

"And how am I supposed to help?" Ben asked, sarcastic. "Without the watch all I can do is help the recruits. Right now I'm just a simple human." the boy turned his head on the side, looking down. If they called him there to humiliate him, they were achieving their purpose.

"Are you really that stUUUUUpid?!"

The redhead's shrill voice made him jump. Dexter was staring at him, annoyed, tapping his finger on the computer's desk.

"Do you really think we stayed here twiddling our thumbs after the Omnitrix got lost? Did you know it's been five years, since your alien hero identity came out, that I've been working on creating a copy of the device?"

"It was ineed really poor and malfunctioning." Azmuth pointed out, getting a glare from Dexter, but the thinker readily ignored it. "But this boy built a good base for it."

"... a good base for what?"

Dexter threw something at Ben, who grabbed it immediately.

"Did you really think that Ben 10's myth could disappear so easily?" Dexter taunted him, grinning.

"Don't delude me again, Ben Tennyson."

Edwin had been surrounded by a herd of Lizard Kings. He was sure he wouldn't make it out alive; just a move and those monster would have teared him into pieces. And the last thing he wanted was starting a mission from zero. Again.

One of them roared and attacked him, but no hit reached the boy, who smiled excited at the sound of a familiar voice that called:

"It's hero time!"

#fusionfall #mybadwriting #as the story goes on #((YES YES BEN'S BACK BEN'S BACK WHOOOOOOOO!!))

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