#meanwhile i have been lying on a bed of nails of anxiety and pressure because im not performing well in any sphere of my life | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

emilyxvalentyne · 5 years

Text

Alcoholic Love CH Part 3

A/n: here is part 3! I’m so glad you guys have loved the series. I am sooooo sorry I took forever to get this to you. This one is written in a 3rd person kinda scripted writing for the beginning of it. But then later on transition into Calum’s POV. I felt like it was important to portray his emotions now in the storyline. I wanted you guys to see how he has been dealing with their problems. This one is a bit short, so sorry I’m advance.

Disclaimer: I am in NO way associated with the characters used in this storyline. Nor am I a licensed personal to tell you what treatments the characters use in this part. Please seek personal help if you are developing or have any symptoms that make you concerned of your health

TRIGGERS/WARNING⚠️⚠️⚠️: Overdose, Alcohol Abuse, Drug Abuse, Depression, Anxiety. If you or a loved one are experiencing any of these illnesses please seek medical help or call the toll free numbers listed in the website below. You are not alone if you can not tolerate any of these triggers or warnings please STOP and skip this PART.

https://psychcentral.com/lib/common-hotline-phone-numbers/

Word count: 1705

Part 3

EMT: “Vitals and BP are 76/55 a neighbor found her in her yard unresponsive. Unfortunately we could not find a form of identification, the police are working on the warrant to search the residents”

Dr.Lyn: “BP is low for her age. Any ideas why”

EMT: “ we found 3 bottles of alcohol at the residence”

Dr. Lyn: “well 3 bottles of beer could not have done her this much harm?”

EMT: “it wasn’t beer Doctor, it was 3bottles of Stella Rosa”

De. Lyn: “she’s going to need her stomach pumped, but before we continue, get radiology down her to preform an X-Ray to figure out why she can’t breath on her own.”

Nurse 1: Dr. Lyn Detective Mitchell is here to speak to you.

Dr. Lyn: great send him in.

Mitchell: Doctor we have contacted the owner of the residence he is on his way now. I need to speak to the patient when she regains her conscience.

Nurse 2: Dr. Lyn our patient blood pressure is dropping, radiology has confirmed that there vomit in her lungs.

Dr. Lyn: prepare suction tube to get it out of her lungs. Order an ultrasound. Look detective right now we are focusing on keeping her alive. If you could please get her information that would really help.

Nurse 2: Dr. Lyn you need to come see what’s on this ultra sound.

Dr. Lyn: Alright what is it.

Nurse 3: we went to get the vomit out of her lungs but we can’t preform the gastric suction, because we believe her appendix is about to rupture.

Dr. Lyn: let me see, run it over her right mid side. HER APPENDIX HAS RUPTURED WE NEED TO PREP HER FOR THE OR STAT! Let’s get her there now everyone let’s get her going, page Dr. Davis now.

Nurse and doctors rushed to get Emily into the OR. Meanwhile Calum was being held in the waiting room while he got his ID check, and so he can prove to the hospital that he knew who you are.

Mitchell: Calum Hood?

Calum: yes that’s me what is going on?

Mitchell: I’m Detective Mitchell I was called into this case when we found her at the residence. Now I need to ask you a few questions? Starting with her name, where she is from and any other information.

Calum: uhh okay yeah, her name is Emily Blanco, she from Las Vegas, and she is a full time student at UCLA, she on the girls soccer team.

Mitchell: and how do you know her?

Calum: she’s....... she’s my girlfriend, well ex girlfriend. Where is she I want to know I want to see her?

Mitchell: you’ll see her soon but as for right now you need to tell us how you can identify her tell us about her physical features so I and the hospital know that you are who you say she is.

Calum: okay. She has long dark almost black hair but it’s dyed blonde at the ends, She has brown eyes, a nose ring, a red dragon tattoo on her back, she 5’8, and she has a a birthmark on her left thigh.

Mitchell: alright I’m going to go work this information to the nurse and I want you to relax man. I’m going to give you my card if you have any other questions.

Calum: thank you detective.

——————————————————

I was just about to start my day when I got the call saying that there was an incident at my house. I never bothered changing the name to hers because I know she didn’t want to see me. She made that clear when I last saw her. I was going to give it some time before I would try to at lease speak with her. But I found myself not wanting too anymore.

Well now it felt like it was to late. I still don’t even know what happened. The lady I spoke with this morning only told me that they needed to search the house for their investigation, and that Emily was in the hospital and I needed to give out any information I know about her. Then that’s when I came directly here. I know that it’s Emily. But I myself, still have not processed what exactly is going on. I felt like I was in shock. I couldn’t hear anything, or feel anything. I now felt prisoner in my own conscience.

“Hey man is she okay? Have you heard anything yet?” Then my trance was broken. Ashton now appearing in my private waiting room. He didn’t look to well either. He seemed sad, worried, not his usual self. He damn well felt hundred times worse then I did. And that is what made me feel guilty.

“No man, they have not told me anything, I did get interrogated though. They’ve already built a case the house is getting searched right now” I don’t know why I felt this sort of way. I felt like I should not be here. Like I’m not that important. Her family should be here not me. I’m supposed to cry and feel anxious to hear from her, but I don’t. Now that is what made me a bad guy.

Ashton on the other hand was bitting his nails. A habit of his that he only does when he is anxious. Ashton was the first one to meet Emily. She was his roommate for 2 years before her and I got together. Ashton knew her from the inside out. Probably even better then I did. She was like his little sister. They never looked at each other anymore then that. Then when Emily and I started dating Ashton became distant with her. He both told us that he never wanted to get involved with our relationship because he strictly was never going to choose sides if we ever did split.

“Fuck man, I just hope she’s okay, I feel terrible for not checking in on her” he feels terrible about not speaking to her. About leaving her alone when she needed friends the most. About leaving her in the dark while I was out with someone new, all while she was trying her best to keep it alive. And Ashton was the one who felt terrible. I felt terrible for not caring. For feeling selfish and wanting to walk out right now. That how much of a piece of shit I am.

I took the past month of my life and moved on. I moved on so fast that I never let myself grieve over the lost of her love. Time and time again I let her down. She didn’t deserve that. She didn’t deserve a guy who spent his time lying and cheating on her. She didn’t deserve to wasting her time waiting up on me to come home, all while I was out sleeping in some other girls bed. She took care of me while I was sick. She picked me up from airports and parties when I couldn’t drive. She showed my parents the city of LA while I was working. She stayed through all the tours and was patience when we went on months with out seeing one another. She did it all. Just for me to forget about her so quick. I ditched her the moment things got complicated for me.

I wanted to so badly just get up and leave. To never step foot any near a place she was at. I wanted to permanently make myself forget that this ever happened. But if I leave now it would only prove I was the bad guy. I never use to let my ego control me. I never had much of one until I started seeing Haylee.

Haylee Bell, she was the blonde who took up most of my time. Haylee was my escape. I could fake that she needed me. That would be my ticket out of here. Ashton would have to buy it. I could just tell him that she was not feeling well and that I have to go see her. That would get me out of here. The only thing is that if the detectives came to find me here I wouldn’t be here.

“I got to go Ash, Haylee isn’t feeling to well”

“You’re just going to leave Cal? Aren’t you worried?”

“I am Ash. I just need to go handle Haylee first, I got to clear my mind up a bit” it wasn’t a complete lie. I was worried but I just needed to leave. Maybe if I convince myself that everything was fine it would turn out fine. I just needed to see Haylee.

————————————-

“Come on babe, you know you want too? Go to Steven he can get you a score” her sweet words had me at my knees. I needed to relieve my stress and get myself high. To get this weight lifted off my shoulders for just a few hours.

As always Steven met in the back ally by her apartment. It was always a causal deal. I take out the trash and see Steven taking out his. We exchange a quick hug and then we hand off. Nothing more. Then I make it back to Haylee’s.

“Good your back now let’s do this” words like that should excite someone, usually they’re tied to sex. But now for us. Ours excites us more. It’s like a kid opening his Christmas gifts and seeing that he got all that he wanted and more. This is what keeps me alive. Without it I would be down in the dumps. I first started it when I met Haylee. It was at a club on sunset Blvd. It was only two lines. Then as started seeing her more it tired in to three, then four, now five. As the effect starts to fade. That’s when I go in for another round. Nothing can bet the feeling then finally getting to fucking score off on drug.

I don’t love Haylee. But I now only use her as my anchor. I’m tied down here because she she knows the best dealers in LA. She’s a fucking decoy for my one love. I love cocaine.

@shanetoo @kikibelle @ambermtz13

#calum blurb #calum hood imagine #calum fic #calum 5 seconds of summer #calum hood fighting imagines #calum 5sos #calum hood blurbs #calum 5sos angst #5sos fic #5sos4 #5sosfam #ashton 5sos #micheal 5sos #luke 5sos #5sos blurb #5sos imagine #5sos

32 notes · View notes

musicalmukebox · 6 years

Text

Let’s Get (Back) Together | l.h. (16)

Ctto of the gif!

AU: Parent Trap Dad!Luke

Summary: A strong love which led to a strong marriage and twin daughters. Yet in the end, it didn’t turn out so well. You strongly refuse to encounter him ever again. But what happens when both of you coincidentally send your twin daughters to the same summer camp in Florida after 10 years?

Word Count: 8.2k

Warnings: angst, swearing, mentions of cheating

A/N: I’M SO SORRY I DISAPPEARED AGAIN!! Anyways, I am back and I’ll make sure to be more consistent especially that we are near the end! Damn, if you think I’ll let you breathe after all the drama happening, well think again! Hope you enjoy this mix of fluff and angst! I love you all!

I don’t own Parent Trap and its ideas. It’s only used as inspiration.

Masterlist

Main Series Playlist

Feedback/Questions/Others? Here.

2023, Los Angeles

Beads of sweat from your forehead did not cease to stream down continuously while you were leaning forward on the hospital bed, having one hand toughly gripping on one side handle of hospital bed while the other one was clutched on Luke’s arm. Red nail marks trademarked his skin, wincing at every tense squeeze from you, though he couldn’t blame you at all.

“I hate you, Luke Hemmings! So much!”

Not entirely true, you screeched at the discomfort at your lower abdomen. How was your mother capable of this? How did Eleanor do it? They struggled with delivering one child in one go, but how about two in your case? Torture.

“You’re doing well, (Y/N). I can see the head of the first twin!” Dr. Kate praised, viewing your core in its entirety. Your body was growing too exhausted by the intensity and closeness of every contraction that was hitting, and your breaths grew shorter as you pushed. Yet it was like nothing was changing.

“Fuck, fuck, I can’t do this!” You cried out, stopping your motions to pant out all that forced effort and lying back in bed to catch your breath. “You did this to me, Luke! Fuck!”

Luke knew you didn’t mean it, and Lord knew he hated watching you in agony because he contributed half of your current state, fearing whether any complications through the delivery process would erupt. He just wanted everything to be safe and pain-free, until you chose to deliver naturally without any anesthetic. Quite a risk, but you are not bringing your twins through the usage of any drugs.

You were on the verge of giving up at the moment, craving rest before trying again. But the contractions were too strong for you to doze off, which only prolongs the physical agony. Damn, once you see your mother later, you are going to spill out words of praise for being able to handle this. Through your weakest moment, Luke took this opportunity to kiss your hand, and tell you motivating words because he knew you were much stronger than the contractions.

“Fuck (Y/N), I’m so proud of you. You got this, okay? Bean 1 is almost here.”

As simple as they were, it mustered up a few more bits of courage and strength for you to channel. Rising back up from your discomforting position, you signaled Dr. Kate that you were ready to go at it. “You sure, (Y/N)? You drained yourself in that last round, and you have another child to deliver.”

Gazing up to meet Luke’s eyes, who has not leaving yours, he held on to your sweaty palm with a hopeful look. “Absolutely.”

Two more tear-jerking pushes alongside a few screams and bean number one was out. Grunting out a heavy breath, your body sunk back at the bed in exhaustion though there was a slight decrease in pressure at your lower region. As you tried to catch your breath, loud wailing surfaced within the hustling of the nurses cleaning off the firstborn. Your droopy eyes got a look of the child, and in awe is the best way to describe this moment.

“It’s a baby girl, Mr. and Mrs. Hemmings. Congratulations.”

Luke couldn’t stray away from the little babe getting cleaned up by one of the nurses, already impatient to carry her in his arms. Most first-time fathers would be fearful with carrying their newborns, yet Luke felt otherwise. He’s waited so long for a child of his own, though having two at the same time isn’t any different.

Though before you would formally meet her, there was still another one who is dying to be delivered and eager to meet its parents. Yes, it. Luke and you chose to find out the gender of the twins on the delivery day. Luckily, bean number two was kind enough to be less painful than its older sister and slid out so easily after three pushes.

At long last, full relief has washed over you with heavy fatigue after almost 20 hours of labor. Slowly resting back on the bed, bean number two screamed its lungs out to alarm of its beginning of life, and only there, tears came running down after everything that has just happened.

“Another baby girl only 10 minutes apart, Mr. and Mrs. Hemmings. Congrats again.”

It’s finally official, you are both parents.

When baby number two was quickly cleaned off the fluids that stuck to her body, she and her other sister were carried by two young nurses and handed one each to you and Luke. They were already sleeping peacefully, fidgeting a bit to find that comfortable position to continue their slumber. The younger one was with you, sporting a knitted purple beanie which you’ve received as a gift from Eleanor on your baby shower. Her cheeks were irresistible not to caress with your index finger up and down, gaining a tiny smirk that softened your heart. “Hi, baby. It’s your mom. Oh, you’re so beautiful.”

Admiring her quietly and even nuzzling your face on her fragrant figure with the famous ‘baby smell’. Dr. Kate’s voice pulled you out of your daze just for a few seconds with a question. “Have you thought of a name, (Y/N)?”

“Yes.” You beamed with pride.

“What would it be then?” Dr. Kate inquired, clicking her black pen down to release the tip as she prepares to write.

“Rebecca Audrey Hemmings.” You catapulted back up to your upright position, acting more proper. Well, tried because Rebecca’s tiny nose was worth a boop or two. “Rebecca because as the youngest, she binds our family together, then Audrey from one of my favorite and classiest actresses of all time, Audrey Hepburn.”

When Dr. Kate got the necessary details, she excused herself with another round of congratulations to share. Now you are left with little Rebecca, you watched her as she abruptly woke up and whimpered because the noises from Dr. Kate woke up.

“Oh, no no. Please don’t cry.” Your whispers negotiated, which worked for a bit until she whimpered again. Rocking her back and forth didn’t work as you wanted, then a different approach came across your mind. Unbuttoning the first few buttons of your night gown that you changed to after the delivery, your free and swollen breast was in contact with the small lips of Rebecca, coming closer when she found the nipple. Thank goodness she suckled on it sweetly than roughly, but at least she was satisfying her hunger.

“Aren’t you a hungry one? Definitely like your mother over here.”

In fact, this simple moment bonded you closer to her, letting yourselves become transparent and vulnerable to each other. You being fatigued and her being new to the world. Side by side, the possibilities of future is endless, and you’ll make sure that you’ll bless her with a great one.

Meanwhile, Luke was tied down on his older daughter by the window, rocking her back in forth with the view of the night sky. Her tiny pupils opened a tiny bit, revealing an identical blue color to her father’s. They were doe-like, full of innocence and unaware of the big world she has joined.

“Would you look at that? We have matching blue eyes.”

Obviously, the newborn could do nothing but stare back at the adult who was in utter captivation by her, his lips parting. Luke trailed a finger on her soft rosy cheeks, which was met by a tight grip of tiny fingers around it. It made him more enamored towards her, and by instinct pecked her bare forehead. Those young eyes of hers which haven’t left his view shined even more from the bright night sky, emphasizing the ocean blues. Luke took a second to look away to glimpse that surreal lighting from the vast night space, finding numerous constellations aligning for everyone to watch.

“Wow, the night sky is just gorgeous, my dear. Come take a look.”

He shifted a bit to his right so his daughter’s view may lean towards the sky than his face momentarily. It worked, and she couldn’t look away up until her eyes were gradually closing. Back to sleep she was. Luke continued to rock her back and forth, humming a familiar tune to soothe her more.

“….I guess I was running from something, I was running back to you….”

“Mr. Luke Hemmings?” A young female voice disrupts his serenading, holding a clipboard with a pen. She was one of the nurses from a while ago based on her scrubs that still have some stains.

“That’s me. Yes?”

“Do you have a name for the little bean you’ve got bundled over there?” She perked up excitedly. Probably a fan from the past trying to hold in her emotions and still act professional. Luke wasn’t too transparent to not notice, but he could care less.

“Yes, I do.” Before he says his answer, he took another admirable look at that same night sky, eyeing on every constellation brightly shining and loving every one of them. It was like fate said that the birth of his daughters is a celebration for the night sky, so they must put on a great show. Having one of his twin daughters in his arms without any anxiety was a stellar scene, one he wishes that would last forever.

“Stella Charlotte Hemmings.” He proclaims with delight with a story as to why that was the chosen combination. “Stella because I know she’ll be shining like a star one day, and Charlotte from the band name of one of my great friends aka. shining legends, Good Charlotte.”

“That is a beautiful backstory.” She swooned as her right hand writes away the details. “You’ve always been very creative with your works, Mr. Hemmings.”

“Wow, witty of you. – And I prefer Luke, by the way.” He chuckled softly, trying not to wake little Stella up because he didn’t want to deal any crying before both of you arrived back home.

“Luke!” You’ve called out, envious of how much time he’s spending with your other child because you wouldn’t want her to think that favoritism is a thing as early as birth. Besides, as her mother, you craved physical contact with her. Luke ended his small talk with the nurse and came to your aid, sitting at the chair by your bedside with a little bundle sleeping serenely in his arms. It was worth a photo, but just moving another limb is tiring enough.

“What did you and that young nurse talk about?”

“Oh, she asked for our little bundle’s name and shared how she was a huge fan back in the day. Autographed her phone before she left.” He responds casually, his eyes kept reverting back to little Stella.

“I’m guessing that’s little Stella.” He nods, standing back up to trade her with the other twin, sleeping away too so she can spend time with you. Now with Rebecca in his arms, he was just as smitten and pecked her forehead too because he couldn’t resist.

“Aww, Rebecca has your nose.” He pointed out, cooing and poking her nose like you did earlier.

“That’s what I thought as well.” You giggled, your finger latched on the miniature hand of Stella.

This moment was too perfect, and nothing can beat it. Now, your wedding has been overthrown as the best milestones in your lives. Despite the pain, it was all worth it.

“Thank you for them, love. I’m sorry I contributed in the pain though.” Luke shyly apologizes, earning a feeble chuckle.

“Don’t be. After all, nothing in life comes easy.”

2034, Sydney

Last night’s dinner, kudos to Luke, was pretty exceptional. He was never the one to cook up a meal because back in the day, he almost burned down your old house! At this point, he suggested to hire a butler to serve you when your jobs get too hectic, when you had no more downtime or when you weren’t home when he was. This lead to hiring Mark, which became much less of a burden and a huge help when your pregnancy limited your actions at home.

Starting out as a mom was quite a struggle in the beginning, most especially when you were handling two children. There were time Luke was out working late, and you still had to email back some producers and other important people for your side projects during your maternity leave. When it was about to end, Eleanor actually came across the idea of hiring a nanny when she visited you with young Alex. It was because it would be much less distracting and inconvenient rather than bringing the girls to work. Foreshadowing, this nanny turned out to be Felicia, who was in her mid-twenties then. She was also an excellent chef, a definite plus!

Being at the Café Sweetener is something you want to back out because it felt like a mistake, but you knew it wasn’t. You agreed to it because it’s about time to let out some transparency. Even though you’re the victim, your mercy on him remained dominant.

Now seated across him in the café, there was killer silence because you both equally feared of saying the wrong things and set the wrong mood. Well, he brought this on you, but still. As much as possible, this must be handled mutually and figure out where both of you stand in this relationship. Or whether there will still be one after. Paps caught the both of you entering the café individually, assuming that it was a romantic date of sorts. But the pictures they’ve been trying to take, all they got were frowns and weren’t pleased, so they passed on the opportunity.

Both of you were situated on a private area of the café so no one inside could eavesdrop on your agenda, shyly ordering drinks and pastries before discussing everything. Once you received them, here’s where business is done and over with. He must have places to be, and you have a family back at Luke’s waiting for you to spend time with. So where exactly now do you stand?

“I thought you were over her.” You spilled out as you stirred your hot tea and looked at him straight in the eyes. Though his eyes couldn’t even look straight to you due to the shame. He hid his held back emotions for too long and afraid for what you have to say, and he should be. “But you aren’t, are you?”

He felt the pain in your tone. You’ve gone through so much, and here you are facing heartbreak again. Inevitably, he came to his senses, dropping the façade he attempted to hold strongly. “I thought I was.”

“How so?” That truth hurt like a bitch, and you were trying to show in your face how deep it stung. You needed more reasons just to understand more. Although you wanted to just walk out and leave it be, you were much better than that. Ready to face this head on and no longer that naïve girl who’d run away from her problems, you followed up. “I would like to know more.”

“What?” He was surprised, almost expecting that you would slap him in the public for all the roaring paparazzi outside desiring a new talk of the town, then storm out because he knew your dealing mechanism is too space away from everything. Besides, he deserved it.

“Timmy, I’m done walking out and being fearful. Please tell me everything.” You’ve reconnected with your guidance counselor persona for him like in the past. Quite rusty, but you were all ears.

“Honestly,” He started off, his elbows on the table to get a little closer but there was still a respect of boundaries. “I was bummed as fuck when you declined to attend the afterparty, but I knew you had your reasons with your family which I fully respect. It’s just that, it was something we planned beforehand, and without you, my experience would empty. I felt threatened by Luke too, why do you think I was harsh on him?”

“What’s there to be threatened at? Luke and I are merely and only work as the parents of Rebecca and Stella, nothing more and less.”

“Not by the way he looked at you in every picture and interview you did. Fuck, I saw both of you guys being touchy in the theater!” He counteracts, almost slamming her utensils on the table and startling you.

“Wow, can you blame that the film was a masterpiece?! Personal comfort serves a better job than tissues, and again, I’ve told you numerously he and I are trying to regain a strong family foundation so trust is needed for that?” You also weren’t having it as he tried to pin the fault on you for his actions, being the victim now.

“Fuck, now you’re defending him? I saw the way you grazed his fingers and laid your head on his shoulder, (Y/N). Being touchy is beyond the limits of personal, especially with an ex!”

“Pretty hypocritical of you now huh, Timmy?” You shouted right at his face. This was just overwhelming, and with the way you were battling, neither can win. With a minute to regain energy, you continued on with slight bitterness. “What happened after being bummed out?”

Timmy exhaled, dreading to tell but he wouldn’t feel fair. “Unexpectedly as I was about to ride the car set for the both of us, I accidentally bumped into Maika on the way. One glance of her, and somehow I felt an a unavoidable string pulling me closer to her so I invited her to the party just as a friend because we just wanted to regain that strong friendship. We sat somewhere private, ate a lot and drank a bit. Not even 2 drinks in, we just revealed everything out; all those pushed back emotions. I cried, and she did too. Drank a few more shots before she said I love you.”

“What did you say? And don’t bullshit it.” You just knew what he was going to say as he finally got the courage to look at you in the eye, but you wanted to hear it for more closure.

“That I loved her too.”

Do not cry, (Y/N). Do not dare. “Did you m-mean it? – And don’t lie either.”

“Fuck, I did, (Y/N).”

Without you realizing, your mind was stimulating your eyes to release tears from heartbreak. You just could never be lucky with romance. To conclude his confession, “It only took one glance to change everything and made me rethink that although it didn’t work out the first time, time away gives you maturity and emotional growth, also time for self-love. Things happened so fast when we were working on Hot Summer Nights and ended the same way. That one simple and accidental glance of her and I felt everything again. Only this time, they were mostly sparks of my affection for her, no matter how hard I tried to deny it.”

As painful as you felt, these life realizations he was stating really shows how much he’s learned and that he’s dealing it better than you. His pain and guilt were easily sensed by the way his eyes drooped so low that he couldn’t look you straight in the eye as he indirectly pleaded you to respond to this words. As much as this felt like a strong slap on the face, letting him go on with life where such a huge mistake like this will haunt him forever is worse than not saying anything in return, which leaves a mystery. To hold grudges is tempting, but it is also wrong.

“He cheated, (Y/N). A big red flag.”

“He said that he no longer loved her, yet he betrayed the trust.”

You were too consumed with your thoughts, not so sure how to approach it properly. As selfish as you want to be because cheating is wrong on all levels, another thought came through, but with a different intention. Something you never figured would be reasonable and still ethical.

"A soulmate is not who makes you happiest, but who makes you feel the most."

“She’s like your soulmate, huh?” By the way his voice was quivering yet stated it confidently, it was quite obvious that he was telling the truth. Yes, his actions were wrong because you were still together, but the heart wants what it wants. You are his friend first even if the trust has been tainted, though the road of closure here is maturity and acceptance. Yes as well, you were pained, but you cannot let him be pained too. You weren’t like that.

“Then go after her, Timmy.”

“Wait, what?” Timmy was already prepared for a raging outburst from you, so your recent words were uncalled for.

“Go after her, Timothee. Don’t make me say it again.” You said with dismay, concealing all the heartbreak by building more walls up your ego. “You might lose her forever if you don’t do and say anything.”

He was still in disbelief, wondering if you were messing with his mind and doing some sort of reverse psychology on him so he would stay. “(Y/N), ple-”

“Holding this against you is so tempting, Timothee. I questioned my worth because of it. Although it’s been only a few days since we’ve seen each other, I’ve come to accept that grudges are unhealthy for me. I’ve experienced all sorts of unhappiness these past years, and now I will no longer stand for it.” You tilted his chin up with your index finger so you would get a better view, caging all those pre-destined tears and praying for calmness of nerves. Timmy sucked up and captured in the view of you, heavily breathing for the tension. “If only one person between us should get their happy ending, it should be you.”

“Don’t say that, (Y/N). Are you that oblivious?” Timmy grew capable to talk again, letting his instincts do the talking.

“Oblivious to what?” You peaked an interest with his question. He blinked twice, gathering his thoughts so that what he was bound to say wouldn’t come out wrong. He already messed up the first time, so he’s pressured that he shouldn’t make more faults.

“(Y/N), Luke is still so obviously and madly in love with you.”

A cat got your tongue and doesn’t intend on giving it back. Were you hoping it was true? You weren’t sure, but one thing was, and it was that he’d stop talking about it. “You have no proof, Timothee. Now please don’t make this harder for the both of us.” You rejected his allegation, praying that the attention doesn’t get to you. But you jinxed it, because Timmy didn’t stop from there.

“He looked so happy when you were taking photos in the red carpet, and those looks he gave at you? Fuck, those were the same lovingly looks he gave when you were still married. I’m not that stupid, you know.” He was very specific with his observations, and it created dead air between the both of you. Though his stare at you was raising in intensity, he was positive that he will get you to admit the actual truth because he was confident enough that you were hiding it.

But were you really hiding anything to begin with? Have your feelings towards Luke really dead? Was it really all strictly parental? Sure, he comforted you in stressful times, but was it only friendly? With this, it leads to the main question is: do you still love him? You were stressfully contemplating on all these resurfaced questions, dreading how much effort will be drained from your brain.

“I’m sure he isn’t in love with me anymore, Timothee. In fact, he’s getting married soon, and I’ve already let him go years ago because I’m just too toxic for him, and vice versa.”

Timothee was still unfazed, disagreeing with your actions. “(Y/N), you’re letting him go because you love him and want him to be happy, even Sierra is awful. How can you not see that? Also, why are you allowing him to get off with that woman?” Timmy was testing your boundaries, almost turning the situation 360 degrees, wherein you were now in question and not him. Because he’s admitted his actual feelings, he really wanted you to keep in touch with yours.

“Look, I don’t want to interfere with Luke’s personal life, Timmy. That isn’t something I would even do! One thing is for sure and it is that he deserves happiness, even if I’m no longer in the equation.”

“But I believe that you’re his true happiness, (Y/N). Sierra could never match up to you.” He insists, making your thoughts and emotions grow wild. You thought you could’ve hidden them so much more, but your mind and heart are malfunctioning due to all those recent late night signs and contemplations that are getting you to realize that they aren’t a coincidence.

Bringing Stella to Camp Wonder? There was hesitation on your behalf, but your mother asserted you to push through with it so it can teach Stella new things and make her more independent. She would’ve never met Rebecca if you let her stay with you. With Rebecca, she was living with her father.

Going to the VMAs? It was a comeback after all those years, and it made people happy. Not having done it would never let you unexpectedly encounter Luke and catch you off guard before your daughters formally did. That was a sign of awe, getting your heart racing already, but you had to shut it down first.

Looking through old things in the “Luke” box while wearing his musky sweater without hesitation after he brought you home from Delilah’s? If you didn’t do it, you would have never reminisced those happy days and open up to Luke because back then, he did make you the happiest girl alive.

Inviting him to your film premiere? It was the first time in a decade that you and he were spotted together. If you didn’t invite him, you would be a nervous wreck stuttering in every question in the interviews and an emotional one too if he didn’t sit beside you and exchanged minimal touches to calm your system.

Meeting that cab driver? He made you rethink everything and really evaluate your life with him. If he didn’t interfere, you wouldn’t have connected with your heart before you slept with your mascara-tainted face, wherein your laziness caved in.

Quite frankly, there happens to be a link with these instances, but there was one more that confirmed everything you’ve tried to deny: last night before dinner. You’ve kept a close eye on every bodily and facial feature of him and knowing its emotional equivalence when you and he talked about your days. In fact, you had racing thoughts that kept directing to the unholy side numerously and didn’t put too much effort in redirecting them back to the platonic zone. You chose to think that way because you couldn’t help yourself. Shamelessly enough, it was like you were still wrapped around his finger and never really let go. Only loosened.

And so whether or not you still love him, he was getting married already to a woman whom you’ve despised. In risking that he knows that you both hate each other, you kept your mouth shut. If this was another chance at happiness, let him be. There may be something in Sierra that he actually accepts and appreciates that you couldn’t see through, so he needs to take it.

“God, you need to rethink this through, (Y/N). All the signs are there, laid out in front of you.”

“But I already ha-”

“You’re letting a great man to marry an evil woman. It wouldn’t just be him at fault, but your daughters as well.” Timmy said monotonously as he took that last gulp of his coffee, closing his eyes as a mechanism to further enjoy its bittersweet taste because all he’s received are bitter vibes. He treasured that small percentage of the sweet, alarmed that from here on until God knows when, he would live with that mistake of betraying you.

“I need space from you, Timmy.” You’ve looked intently at him as the pressure in your system boiled up, wanting to process everything once more solo. He was correct without a doubt with what you’re doing, but he still fucked up more than you.

“I understand, (Y/N).” He got up from his seat and left the napkin from his lap on the table. Taking slow steps away, he stopped by your shoulder and put a hand on it. “I may have messed up, and I’m fucking sorry that I did what I did. But remember that you deserve happiness. I can’t force you to love him again, but at least you must do the right thing. – Goodbye for now, (Y/N).”

“Goodbye, Timmy.” He kissed the top of your head as he slowly distances away from you. You could’ve already turned into a crying mess because that has been so common these past days with everything that’s resurfacing and occurring, but no. Not this time.

“Do the right thing, (Y/N).”

And damn right, you will.

“Good night, girls.” Luke waves at the two, who’ve reached the top of the stairs already.

“Night, dad. Night, mom.” They said in sync before going inside Rebecca’s room, which was quite a mess since Stella hasn’t properly organized her belongings meant for her luggage. She had shirts on Beck’s bed, some sneakers under it, and even her dress from the premiere was crumpled on the mini rolling chair by Beck’s study desk.

As much as she didn’t want to pack yet, she had to, or else you would leave her behind. Although it was a good idea since she knew how to travel alone, it would be fair to you. Either way, the situation of leaving (or staying) was a lose-lose situation. She already risked so much just days ago for and with her father, and she couldn’t allow herself to get in a rough state ever again with you, who was just as broken as he is. What a heart-warming thing that she really has all this love her despite that consented lack of paternal influence for a decade, even if she had no idea about the breakup. With or without knowing, she kept an eye on you always just like you. Like mother, like daughter.

Rebecca laid back on her headboard, lowly viewing the slowness and feeling the emotional heaviness of her twin sister’s movement to load her luggage. She was just as disheartened that Stella was leaving when everything is about to get better with the family, and it worries that she didn’t have a clue when she’d see her again personally. Sure, video calls exist, but with the wide time difference? It’s too much of a sacrifice for one of them to be awake late night, while it’s day time for the other since school was about to start for them individually. They respect each other so much that they wouldn’t want to disrupt their rest and health. Regardless, she is thankful. Thankful they had time to achieve a huge chunk of their initial plan.

Throughout it, they matured so flawlessly from the different experiences that profoundly influenced their mindsets since now, it will be very important because they are almost reaching their teenage years. Also, the wise words they have received from the new people they’ve met and those whom they knew their entire lives. The main learning experience they took home for them to really cherish in the long term was that though you dream so big it hurts because you really want it to come true, you should still take things slowly because hard work and growing isn’t overnight.

A proper application of that would be their parents’ past romance.

To recap, their main mission was to set you two up again in hopes you’ll fall in love again, get married and receive the dream happy ending of having a complete family. But in time, they processed the logic that forcing that kind of commitment and rushing it all in the limited time they were given only would worsen things and crumble down. Luke indirectly revealed from the Sierra incident that he and you broke things off because there was a lack of trust and based on previous calculations from the day you met up to the day you married, it was all happening so fast. It was almost like back then, the honeymoon stage lasted for too long that when it was over, neither of you could handle the pressure.

With that in their knowledge, no same mistakes should be done twice. Surely, it gutted them harshly to accept this, but in order for this to work, it’s about time to take things slowly. Learn and relearn from each other and not to expect too. No longer was the endgame for the both of you to fall back into love, but to grow and strengthen the family for all the missed time.

“Earth to Becks. Becks to Earth.” Rebecca was removed from her thinking realm when she overheard her twin calling out her name numerously. How long has she been in her trance?

“Shit, sorry. What were you saying, Stella?” She trained her mind to focus on her twin, no more dozing off like usually what she does in her math classes.

“Well, I was saying that everything was too fast and too soon. Shucks, now the family is mending back to pieces, I’m leaving you and dad again.” She wept, the separation anxiety already kicking in her system. As much as she loved you, she disliked that your job is interfering with all these family plans, all before it was time to go home and get back to school. Times will get busier, and the future is unpredictable. What if cutting ties again will occur?

It’s a good thing she isn’t alone on this fear. “I’m on the same page too, Stella. It’s too soon yeah. But hey, at least we had some memories for keeps, right?” Rebecca attempts to remain optimistic, anxious for the unknown. Then out of the blue, her phone vibrated against her pocket, which is a signal that she got a message. As she yanked it out, it was none other than Darcy Styles. She couldn’t hold back her smile and quiet giggling when she slid on the notification, unlocking her phone.

[10:36 PM] Darcy Styles: Hey love! How was your day?

Ever since Darcy and Becks switched numbers at the movie premiere, they’ve been talking non-stop about anything, like food, TV shows, animals, the possibilities are endless! Phone calls were rare because they live on opposite sides, and there hasn’t been any down time, so texting was easily accessible.

[10:37 PM] Becks Hemmings: Pretty fun! Went around Sydney with the fam! How about you?

Yet only recently, they’ve grown even closer when Becks let herself vulnerable to her through messages when she was on the way home from the beach house post-Sierra, when the deadliest silence was driving her nuts mentally. If you think that the Sierra issue was only between your and the bands’ families, you thought wrong. Issues like that can really affect how you think, and at her young age, she needed more support. And seeking that from Darcy even she wasn’t physically there to comfort her was really helpful.

Darcy is different from all her old and new friends, like she really understood the struggles and open in giving proper advice. Becks is not one to let her guard down easily, but with Darcy, she felt secured. It’s too soon to say, but with their continuous conversation, Becks finds herself questioning more, and it hasn’t been the first time.

“Ooh who texted?” Stella cooed, zipping up her final luggage with a hint of trouble because there were too much items tightened inside. Back and forth with the zipper so it wouldn’t break, she got to close it eventually and jumped to the bed, where her twin still hasn’t answered her question. Even though she knew who it was, she wanted to hear it for herself.

“Jane, from camp. Remember her?” Becks lied, keeping her phone out from Stella’s lingering eyes. But Stella was quicker than her to glimpse at their recent messages, squealing, “Yeah right!! Totally not one of my best friends, that’s for sure.”

Rebecca got flustered, not used to having anyone to talk to about these growing feelings that she has never experienced. Freaked out was an understatement too because these kinds of feelings towards someone who is the same sex as her was still not okay in society, and she didn’t want anyone to change their view on her. Most especially her family.

“Hey, you okay? You look zonked.” Stella snapped her fingers at her, halting her racing thoughts.

“Oh y-yeah. Feeling perfect.” Another lie leaves Rebecca, only this time, Stella knew she wasn’t being honest, and that breaks an aspect of their sisterly pact. This cannot be.

“Hey.” Stella starts off, obviously seeing her sister’s fright. She felt nervous too. “You know you can tell me anything? We are family after all.”

Rebecca was ashamed to have said those lies as she recalled of their pact, but they were her shield. Though the world has progressed so much these past decades, sadly there was still a slight stigma, and she heavily reflected on that. She’s seen clips online and on the television about kids like her who were disowned and even murdered because of how they identify themselves. Also, she felt as if she was invalid because she couldn’t just choose one to fully like without others having to say that “there’s no middle ground! just choose one.”

“Rebecca? - Look, I’m not pressuring you to share me what you’re feeling, okay?”

She was called again by Stella, who stated a disclaimer, although she really wanted to understand what her twin was feeling. Rebecca trusted Stella enough to know that she has no prejudice in her heart, but she was still hesitant. Regardless, she needs to be an honest girl. She took a deep breath, praying to the heavens for the best. “You do remember Jane, right?”

“Oh yes, Jane. She “accidentally” spilled orange juice on me that one time when we were still enemies in camp during lunch time.” Stella gestured, reminiscing such an embarrassing moment. “I’m sorry, but she was kind of a little shit.”

Rebecca chuckled. “None taken.”

“What about her though?” Stella continued on, wanting to know the main point of Rebecca bringing her up.

This is where Rebecca had her nerves all over the place, trying to calm them down so she could speak more sanely and properly. She managed to get this far, so might as well open up more so she could more truthful to Stella, and most importantly, herself. It was a good first step, and Stella was all ears.

“Well, one late night in my cabin with her and Hannah way before you and I met, we were playing truth and dare. I chose truth, and Hannah asked if I’ve ever kissed a boy.”

“And then?”

“I said yes, with some boy in my Math class way before camp. His name was Noah, and he was pretty cute. Anyways, not the point. When I was done, Hannah asked Jane the same question, where Jane said dare. This is where things for me got more mind-blowing.”

“What happened, Becks? You’re scaring me.” Stella says with unease.

Rebecca prepared herself for the worse, and admitted, “Hannah dared her to kiss me. And when we did, she cringed and ran away because she was embarrassed. It’s like I’m supposed to feel the same as her and shake off the cringe, but I didn’t. I actually enjoyed it.”

Stella struggled to comprehend at first, asking “So wait, you liked the kiss from Jane in the same way you kissed Noah?”

Rebecca nodded, her voice growing shaky as she added, “To be honest with you, this hasn’t been the first time I’ve liked boys and girls in the same way. - I used to have a big crush on Nick when we were in preschool because he always gave me flowers, and Alex teased me about it a lot. It died when he began giving flowers to someone else, no hard feelings alongside. Although when I was around 7, I became attracted to Scarlett, who was around 9. She is a great singer, and really pretty, having brown curly hair with green eyes that caught me off guard. She was my first girl crush, until she called me a “little sister from another mister.” Indirectly, I was friendzoned, but I’m glad that it made me realize more things about myself.”

“Which was? Summarize everything, poppet.” Stella was still puzzled, but not as much as earlier. Rebecca was right, noticing that she had no judgmental faces to give and open to listen to her. She felt safe.

“I’ve accepted that I like boys and girls in the same romantic way. – Stella, I’m bi.” She came out, yet hid herself under a blanket like before with you, when she revealed her real self. This moment coincidentally mirrored that. This was a huge step for Rebecca in accepting a part of her identity, and she’s relieved to have done it. Still, she braced herself with her twin has to say about it. “Say something please.”

Stella was pretty stunned at first because she would’ve never figured Rebecca felt this way. However, it was not the first time to experience and meet someone who was not straight; an example already is Gina. This has already opened her mind about the various kinds of diversities in our world and increased her interest in learning these new things. She could never see herself as someone with ignorance because those types of things cannot be chosen, they just come along. And the best way to go is to accept, learn more and love equally. “Uncover yourself first, Becks.”

Stubborn at first, Rebecca came to her senses and followed the older twin, removing the thick white duvet from her face. She sat upright, her eyes were still viewing downwards to her sweaty palms. Stella sees right through her emotions, and clasps her hands on the sides of Rebecca’s hands, trapping them. Rebecca was surprised, making her look upwards to her sister, with a sensible grin. “What made you so afraid to tell me, poppet?”

She didn’t expect such an inviting tone, fearing that it could be a façade in order to make her feel better. But she had a gut feeling that Stella wouldn’t lie like she minimally did, it would worsen their sisterly pact.

“I was scared that you would look at me differently, like I’ve seen films and videos of people who came out and aren’t accepted. I just got you and mom back, and I didn’t want to lose you again.” Rebecca shed a single tear, successfully trying her best to refrain from producing another. Stella caught it, wiping it away from her face.

“You will never lose me and mom, alright? Don’t even think of that!” She reassured. Rebecca was thankful to be accepted for who she is really is, wherein no more hiding secrets between her twin. Though, there is still you and Luke to tell.

“Does dad know?” Stella added. Rebecca shook her head left and right, her thoughts redirecting now to him. Will he still love her in the same, fatherly way?

“Ooh, I see. But no rush, okay? - There is no need to feel ashamed, Rebecca. It’s part of who you are! We live in a time where topics like this aren’t as taboo as they used to be way back based on what school taught me, so you must embrace that, and if others don’t like it, then screw ‘em! Easier said than done, but this is a start. So thank you for trusting me, I fully accept and love you and nothing will ever change that.” Stella elaborated positively, then willingly offers a hug to Rebecca, who takes it. This made her heart grow 10 times bigger because she was understood properly.

“Thank you. Thank you so much.” Rebecca mumbled under her breath, but loud enough for Stella to hear. As they part from their intimate gesture with warm hearts, Stella brought up a previous question back. “So, who actually texted you a while ago?”

“Darcy.” Rebecca comfortably answered. “We’ve been talking since the premiere, though it’s all friendly.”

“Yeah right! Do you think I don’t see your eyes and smile beam up when she texts? You’re into her, 100 percent!”

“Am not! I may like girls, but I can still be friends with them! And hey, do you think I don’t see how much you gush around Alex recently?” Rebecca retaliated proudly, finally getting to ask that especially after she’s sneakily watched them from afar at the campfire. “You know, I saw you guys get cozy back at the beach house, specifically at the camp fire.”

“That was nothing really. We were just getting to know each other more since most of you guys left to either pee or get sodas when we weren’t up for them!” Stella defended herself with the truth. Or so she thought it was as of now. Girls can be just friends with guys, anyways.

“O-kay, whatever you say, bub.” Rebecca surrendered her arguing even though she had more receipts towards her sister and best friends getting very close. Majority of people would be disgusted if they found that their sibling is dating their best friend, but not with Stella. She’s already thinking in advance, and she’s pretty cool with it if something happens. But if any of them mess up or fool around, then damn prepare yourself.

“Let’s not think too ahead of ourselves okay? Let’s just focus on now please. – Okay, wait. I just realized something.” Stella adds on.

“What is it?”

Cue maturity development.

“Pretty tough to say, but I’m happy that there’s no more bad blood between mom and dad. Like although it’s a bonus, it doesn’t matter to me anymore if they don’t fall in love again like we wanted, but just to have this time together was much better.”

“I actually agree. We should never force them to do that because falling in love again isn’t easy, and since mom is with uncle Timmy, we should respect that. As long as the family is reunited happily and I get to see you and mom more, then I’m happy too.” They hugged once more to seal their sisterly love, before Rebecca brings up a less serious topic and gets a hold of her laptop from her study desk before lying back down.

“So, remember we asked how mom and dad met? It was through one of dad’s music videos, Valentine?”

“Yup, what about it?”

“Wanna take a look at it then? It’s just in Youtube anyways.”

“Omg yes, type away!” Stella cheered, watching her sister type the words and clicking on the first video that came up, with Luke and you on the thumbnail. As they listen to the song and view the video attentively, they adored at how little you’ve facially and physically aged.

“Wow, they look amazing.”

“Woah, mom’s kissing everyone here.”

Those were some of the many comments they gave, jamming along to the familiar song they’ve overheard playing when they were still apart. How music is truly strong in connecting people. Afterwards, Stella suggested Netflix on Rebecca’s widescreen television, which was fulfilled because the latter wanted to watch as well. As they scrolled through numerous categories of films, they settled on old family movies, ranging mostly from Disney. Nothing has yet caught their eye since they’ve watched numerous times, until they landed on unfamiliar film, of which once they’ve read a synopsis, they were hooked.

“Hmm, the Parent Trap. Looks promising.” Stella plays the mini trailer of the film, intrigued.

“When two girls who seem to be polar opposites meet at summer camp, they think they have nothing in common -- only to discover they're identical twins.” Rebecca reread, crinkling her eyes in realization. “Could relate to us, huh?”

“Probably? But we won’t find out ‘til we play the movie? Come on now!” Stella infers, impatient for her sister to press the play button.

“Jeez, chill! Pressing play.”

“(Y/N), wait!” Luke chases after you after you ran away in shock. You were in disbelief, lacking oxygen in your lungs at the bomb Luke has just dropped. Nothing could stop your pace as you dangerously leaped the slippery steps. Blasting open the door of the guest room, you loudly locked it shut before jumping on the bed with your raging emotions. Screaming against your pillow, a waterfall of tears were released. Only this time, it was the peak of your pain. You hiccuped more than usual and screamed until your throat became dry.

Not so long later, soft knocks crept in when you removed the pillow on top of your head. “(Y/N), please let’s talk.”

“Leave me alone.” You shouted back, too hurt to face him and full of anger in your heart.

“Please open the door. I’m begging you.” Luke knelt against the door, pleading to explain.

“Just go away, Luke.”

129 notes · View notes