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tell me who i run to (if not you) | anthony beauvillier | Ep 3. Pal-entine's Day
This is a completed series!
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Episode synopsis:Tito returns her kindness by being a shoulder Evie can lean on when she is having a hard time after all-star break. She tells him it’s anxiety about work. He brings her a box of pastries and they cuddle on the couch all day; he doesn’t realize it’s Valentine’s Day.
Later, a hook-up goes very wrong.
A/N: You can refer to cover page for the series summary, author's notes, tropes, general warnings and other fun tidbits.
This series contains mature themes. Minors DNI.
Warnings: This episode contains mentions of a past toxic relationship and sex that occurs off screen.
Disclaimer: This series is set in Chicago but does not mention the name of the team.
Word count: 4.8k // 44.5k
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Pal-entine’s Day
Evie — February 10
It’s late when Evie finishes work for the day. She rubs her eyes and finishes her cup of tea, which is now less than lukewarm. She sighs. This was kind of her own doing. She didn’t work as much as she should’ve in January, especially in the week that Tito stayed over, which means she’s feeling more behind than she would like them to be. Not to mention, this latest work she was editing was full of so many glaring issues that the document has more comments than text at this point.
She puts her phone down and rests her head on the table.
She doesn’t regret it. Tito had been clearly so down in the dumps after his wrist injury. She had taken him to the different museums, touristy sights, and fun restaurants around town that she had been meaning to get to; she had thought that she would catch up on her work when he was in Florida with his brother’s family during Bye Week.
She doesn’t regret it because their adventures brightened his mood every time, his glowing smile seared on the inside of her eyelids. She thinks about the time she had taken him to the Skating Ribbon in Maggie Daley Park on a particularly bad day.
He had come back from the rink dejected after being told he couldn’t join no-contact practice yet. He had been cleared to skate, though. So, the joy on his face when he stepped onto the ice again, even if it was a park and not an NHL arena, made them both feel a hundred pounds lighter.
She doesn’t regret it. It’s just that— Unfortunately, her plan to catch up on work during Bye Week didn't happen. The day after Tito left for Florida, her apartment felt startlingly empty.
It reminded her of when she had first moved to Chicago. She had just a couple of boxes and suitcases. She left behind all the remnants of her life with Pierre. Those plates, pillows, and knickknacks didn’t feel like they belonged in her life anymore. That’s why she moved, right? To get a clean start at age 28.
It wasn’t just stuff she had left behind. It was her whole life, a life that had looked increasingly foreign in those final months anyway. All of their friends, all of their stuff, all of their memories. He could keep them. She just wanted out.
Those first months in Chicago had felt so lonely, living without anyone else for the first time ever. It was hard to make friends in a new city, so she spent a lot of time just in her apartment. The thought kept creeping into her head that she would probably be alone forever and regret leaving her seemingly perfect relationship behind in Toronto.
She downloaded and deleted Bumble probably ten times in the first few months.
Eventually, she met Kelsey, Leanne, and the others at a work-sponsored holiday party. They were unhappy that she hadn’t reached out sooner. So, with them dragging her out of her house a few times a week to whatever restaurant, bar, or event, she eventually settled into life in Chicago. Looking back, she’s not quite sure when her one-bedroom apartment started to feel like home.
That's why she’s so shocked to find herself once again feeling unsettled. Her sleep hasn’t been great either, making her sluggish and heavy. In the week or so since Tito left for Florida, she has only left her house twice. Both of them were to see him play when he returned to the lineup after the All-Star break.
When she looks around her apartment, she can see the small pile of his clothes that sits at the far end of the couch. She had washed them while he was away and folded them so they would be clean when he came back.
That was a week ago.
She’s happy that he’s back at training and back in the line-up. She appreciates the rigorous schedule that he's sticking to to get back to the top of his game.
She understands that means she takes a back seat. It’s just that she wishes a little part of her didn’t resent it or herself for missing his company that she didn’t know she had gotten so used to.
She doesn’t pester him, though, not when he was on vacation and not now that he’s been back training. He still texts her every day, and she tries not to get too excited when he does, being mindful to not be too suffocating and demanding of his time and attention.
She figures it’s probably not a bad idea to realign her priorities: to focus on her work and on the book that she wants to finally finish soon.
Tito — February 14
Tito watches as the sky begins to lighten and decides to just give up on going back to sleep. He reaches over and checks his phone.
5:48 am.
Great.
He unlocks his phone, which opens to the text thread with Evie he had been staring at after the game last night.
Monday, 4:46 pm
evie 🧁: sorry, i don’t think i’ll be coming to the game tomorrow. i’m just totally under water with work right now.
To evie 🧁: damn, that sucks. i’m sorry. do you want me to come over with some dinner tonight?
To evie 🧁: or after the game tomorrow?
He didn’t receive a reply until past midnight that night.
Yesterday, 1:18 am
evie 🧁: nah, it’s okay
To evie 🧁: good morning to you too. how're you doing? work hasn’t killed you right? i can bring over some lunch. i bet you havent been eating much.
Read
He quickly swipes out of his messages and locks his phone again.
He stares out the window. They have only known each other for less than two months, but not hearing from Evie for so long throws him off-kilter.
This is so unusual, given their typical rhythm, that even if work has been busy, he’s worried, and underneath the worry, he’s confused. It seemed unlike Evie to not be open with him about whatever was bothering her— at least, he thought she was.
A little while later, he finds himself sitting in front of her favorite bakery on his way to her apartment. He waits for the clock to hit 9 a.m. before he heads in and picks up breakfast for them both: a selection of pastries and two coffees. It’s busier than he expects, but there are still plenty of their favorites left.
He’s been to Evie’s building enough times now that the doorman recognizes him and buzzes him up the elevator straight away with a nod. It’s only when he's standing outside her door that he realizes he should've probably texted beforehand to make sure she was free.
Too late now. Tito rings her doorbell, his heart in his throat as he listens for any sound inside.
Somewhere between 30 seconds and 10 minutes later, he hears some shuffling, and the door opens slowly. Standing in the entryway is Evie rubbing her eyes with the sleeve of his Canucks hoodie, sleep shorts barely peaking out under the hem. He rips his eyes away from the soft skin of her legs.
She startles when she sees him, her eyes wide. Her messy hair and fuzzy slippers only intensify the warm fondness buzzing in his chest.
“Um, hi,” she says, stepping aside to wave him in. “What’s all this?”
“Nice hoodie,” he beams at her, a crooked smile tugging on the corner of his lips.
“What?” She looks down and immediately covers her face with her hands. “Oh shit, this is yours. I was just grabbing the first hoodie I saw, and it was sitting on my— I’m sorry, do you want it back? I can go change.”
“Hey,” he says gently, setting the food down on the kitchen counter. “No, keep it on. I can’t really wear it out anymore, and it looks good on you.”
She cracks a smile for the first time this morning.
“Here, I brought you some breakfast and coffee— peppermint mocha, half sweet, with oat milk. I figured you might need something stronger with all the late nights you’ve been working.”
She stares at him silently for a long time before reaching for the coffee and whispering a quiet, “Thanks.”
He smiles at her and pulls her in for a quick hug, feeling some of the tightness in his chest melt away as he breathes in her scent. As he pulls back, he waves her to the couch.
“Go, sit.” He pushes her gently. “I’ll bring over the food.”
As if on cue, her stomach grumbles. “What did you get? Oh! Oooh! Good Ambler. My favorite,” she says excitedly, finally looking more like herself.
He smiles to himself as he puts the food down on the coffee table. “Yeah, I know! I got us the quiche and a bunch of their pastries.” He opens the box and watches as her eyes light up.
She laughs, “Wow, you really went all out.”
“I guess I did,” he shrugs.
They eat in a comfortable silence for a while, both deep in thought. It’s been a few days since Tito has set foot in her apartment. He feels more at home here than in his own place. There are touches of Evie everywhere.
She has shelves next to the TV console that are covered in books. There are at least five more books spread around the room. Her fuzzy blanket is draped across the back of the couch. There are candles on her coffee table, sitting next to colorful coasters with bad book puns on them. Unhung art and posters are leaning against the bottom of the walls. The space is so clearly lived in and loved.
Although, as he looks around, he can see the signs that things might be a bit off. There are dirty dishes piled up in the sink when there usually wouldn’t be any. There are stacks of papers spread across various surfaces. A box next to the bin for the overflowing trash. He counts at least seven mugs of mostly drunk tea around the space.
He frowns.
“So,” he starts cautiously, “how've you been?” He winces at how awkward that sounds.
“Oh, you know. Same old, same old. Busy? I guess mainly.” She stares at the muffin in her hands, pointedly avoiding his skeptical expression.
He sighs and reaches over, his broad hand lightly covering her wrist. “Hey, I feel like something has been off recently, and I want to know what’s going on. Is it just work that’s been crazy? Or is there something else?”
Evie looks up at him finally; their eyes meet, both assessing the other. He can see the dark circles that dull her tired eyes, her expression pained.
“Yeah, I’ve just been having trouble getting stuff done. But it’s not a big deal. It’s fine, though. I can handle it.” She frowns and picks at the remaining half of the muffin.
“Hey,” Tito says gently. He reaches out, takes the muffin, and puts it down before taking her hands in his. The movement makes them turn to each other. “It’s okay if you’re struggling. Just tell me how I can help. I won’t judge you, okay?”
She shakes her head, tugging her hands back and hugging them to her body. “Yeah, I know, but I’m okay. I don’t want to be a pain—”
“Evie,” he says gently, “Asking for help doesn’t make you a pain. Look, we’re friends, right? You were there for me last month when I was having a really bad time. And now I want to be here for you. You should let me help where I can. Or at least tell me what’s wrong. I can’t guarantee I’ll always say or do the right thing, but I’ll listen, and I’ll try to help where I can, okay?”
She looks at him, searching his face for a lie and not finding one in his open and caring expression. “Okay,” she whispers with a small smile.
“Okay.”
He hands her back her muffin, and they finish up their breakfast. He takes their trash to the kitchen, and despite her complaints, he does the dishes as he makes them both a cup of tea.
When he sits back down on the couch, he finally speaks again, “So, are you going to tell me what’s wrong? Or at least, if there’s anything I can do to help?”
She heaves a big sigh but does smile at him warmly before settling into the couch. “I guess I just had a kinda bad week last week? I'm kinda behind on stuff, and I got really in my head about it. Remember how I told you I moved here after a bad breakup? Well…” She shrugs.
“You don’t need to explain if you don’t want to. I know it sucks. I mean, I haven’t dated anyone seriously since before the pandemic. But we actually broke up like January 2020, so those first few months in lockdown were really rough. Just bad feelings and a whole lot of time.”
She looks up at him, “Oh. I had no idea.”
“It’s not a big deal. That was quite a few years ago at this point, anyway. I’m over it now, but— I’m just saying that I know it can be hard.”
“Yeah,” she nods, fiddling with her mug before finally saying, “Honestly, I’m not that bummed about the breakup. It wasn’t bad or anything. Or at least nothing bad happened. Things just sort of just… I don’t know. I was just feeling like shit all the time.
“By the time I left, I had already been mentally checked out for a while, so I wasn’t really sad at all anymore. It was mainly hard because our lives were so entwined.
“We had gone to grad school together, and we were working at the same company. We had all the same friends, and everyone loved him, you know? So, it was hard to leave that behind.”
He reaches out and squeezes her knee, encouraging her to keep talking.
“It’s just… I hate it, feeling like I’m falling behind.”
“Like on work?”
She nods weakly.
“Well, if it’s anything I’ve had to learn in my career, you’re more than your productivity. You don’t need to be perfectly productive all the time to be contributing something.”
“Yeah… it’s just that—” Evie sighs.
“What?”
She swallows heavily and looks out the window. “It’s just that… I hate feeling behind at work because it makes me feel like I’m behind on my career. And that’s really all I have right now. After— Like, I’m 28 years old, and what do I have to show for it.”
He studies her face and squeezes her knee again, drawing her gaze back to him. “Who told you that?”
“What?”
“Who told you that you’re behind on life?”
“Well… Pierre? I guess. My ex. He used to talk about success milestones—”
“Success what?” he interrupts.
She powers on. “Just, like, things I should accomplish by a certain age. And when I left, you know? I set back my life? Single again. Starting over. And when I left, Pierre kinda pointed that out. And all I have left is my career— a struggling career.”
“Okay, honestly?” He says, fuming, “Fuck Pierre. Like, what the fuck is that?”
“No,” she shakes her head, chewing on her bottom lip, “No. I don’t— He’s right.”
“He isn't right.” He's sitting up now, fully facing her. “He's not— Firstly, your career isn't struggling. You have a job you enjoy, and from everything I’ve heard from Kelsey and Leanne, you’re fucking good at it. You’re making progress with finishing your book every week, which is awesome. I see you working your ass off all the time. And on top of all that, you're a great fucking friend. And a great fucking person.”
He shakes his head and sighs loudly. “Evie, you don’t have to complete some stupid made-up checklist to be successful. Only you get to decide what counts as success in your life. That's the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard. Honestly, Evie, I'm saying this as your friend, fuck Pierre for making you feel lesser and smaller with this bullshit.”
She looks at him, her face betraying her surprise at his outburst. His cheeks are warm and probably a little flushed, but he doesn’t care. He can feel the anger in his veins, opening and closing his fists to dispel some of the energy.
“I guess?” she says finally. “Pierre’s really not a bad guy. He’s a good person. We just— He just wasn’t a good fit for me.”
“Okay,” he concedes, silently disagreeing with her assessment.
“Thanks, though. For saying that. It means a lot.” She reaches out and squeezes his clenched fists. “Thank you. I'm okay, really. Overall, in the grand scheme of things, anyway. I’m sorry I didn’t come to your game yesterday.”
“It’s okay. You don’t have to come to every game. It’s just an offer.” He smiles softly. “I mean, I’d love to have you there, obviously, but I’ll understand if you don't.”
“Okay,” she smiles back.
“So, do you think you can take today off? I think you might be a little burnt out.”
She sighs and looks at her phone, the emails trickling in. She knows she has the time; she always makes herself finish far earlier than whatever deadline her director gives her. She fires off a quick message to the group, telling them she’s taking a mental health day, before putting her phone face down on the coffee table.
“Yeah,” she smiles, “I can take today off.”
“Good,” he beams. He puts his arm around Evie’s waist and pulls her into his side. He reaches for the remote. “That’s good because I haven’t seen any Brooklyn Nine-Nine in like two weeks, and I know the next episode is a Halloween heist episode, and it’s been killing me.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, dummy. That’s our show. I can’t watch it without you.”
She laughs, “Okay.”
He puts on the show, smiling as it plays the cold open. He turns to her and tugs her in closer.
“Hey, Evie?”
“Yeah?”
“Please just tell me what’s bothering you next time, okay?”
“Yeah, okay. I will. I promise.” She smiles up at him from his side, and he feels his chest tighten.
A few episodes later, they've slid down on the couch so that she’s almost lying on top of him. He looks down at her head on his chest to see her sound asleep. He pauses the show and pulls out his phone.
To jason dickinson: yo, do you have any more restaurant recs? evie’s been having a rough week, i’m thinking maybe taking her out for dinner today might cheer her up
jason dickinson: eyyyyyyy get it!!!!!!
To jason dickinson: ????? get what???
jason dickinson: uh? is this a trick question?
To jason dickinson: no?
jason dickinson: a date? laid? idk
To jason dickinson: WHAT?!!!!
jason dickinson: you’re asking for a date spot right?
To jason dickinson: wtf jason, no. we’ve been through this. we’re just friends.
jason dickinson: riiiiiiight. just friends who ask for a date spot on valentine’s day
Tito’s eyes widen as he glances at the calendar app on his phone.
February 14.
Valentine’s Day.
Fuck.
Next to him, Evie stirs, yawning.
“Hey,” she says, her voice muffled, “You paused the show?”
“Yeah, you fell asleep.”
She chuckles. “I guess I did.” She looks up at him and frowns. “What’s up, Tito? You got a weird look on your face.”
“Oh, um. I just realized what day it was.”
“What day is it?” she looks at her phone.
“Yeah, it’s Valentine’s Day.”
“Oh!” she laughs, shaking her head. She pulls away, sitting up, and runs her fingers through her hair. “Okay? Did you have plans? I’m good here if you want to go.”
“What? No? What plans would I have?”
“I don’t know, Anthony. Maybe you’re an international man of mystery,” she laughs, lightly shoving his knee.
“Sure I am,” he says, rolling his eyes, “That’s not what I meant, though.”
“What did you mean then?”
“I don’t know. Maybe you have plans.” She gives him an unimpressed look. “Okay, well, maybe you don’t have plans. But I didn’t get you anything.”
“Do friends get friends Valentine’s Day gifts?”
He sucks in a breath. “I mean, no? I don’t know.”
“You did get me a whole box of pastries. I feel like that’s pretty good. I mean it’s not like I’ve ever celebrated Valentine’s Day before.”
He freezes, brows furrowed.
“What? You never celebrated with Pierre?”
“Nope,” she shakes her head.
“Weren’t you together for like five years?”
“Yep!” she shrugs. “He just wasn’t into that sort of stuff. He thought it was stupid and a waste of money.”
“Come on, what the fuck?” he says, rolling his eyes.
“Yeah, we never did anniversaries either. It’s not a big deal.”
“Please tell me he at least did birthdays.”
“I guess. I mean, he always got me birthday and Christmas presents, but usually nothing major. I always planned a dinner and stuff with our group of friends for my birthday.”
He studies her face, his brows furrowed.
She sits up. “What?”
“Seriously?”
She nods.
“I bet he always got you to plan his birthday parties too.” He rolls his eyes and sighs. “I don’t mean to be rude, but like. Fuck Pierre, man.”
She’s quiet for a second before saying softly, “It’s really not a big deal.”
He shakes his head. “I mean, sure, Valentine’s Day is kinda stupid and cheesy. But that’s the point. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t use it as an excuse to show someone you love them.”
“Wow, Anthony. I didn’t know you were such a romantic,” she grins, bumping his shoulder.
“I’m not. He just sounds like he was being lazy and didn’t really care to try.”
“It’s really not that big of a deal, Tito. Guys're just like that.”
His eyes follow the sad smile she gives him, and he pauses. Her eyes are a little glassy, and her cheeks redder. He knows when to leave something be.
“Guys are absolutely not ‘just like that,’” he says, making air quotes. “But I’ll drop it.”
He lays back down, tugging on her arm. He mutters, “I just think that he should've cared enough to try, like, even a little bit.”
“God, you're such a sap. Imagine your teammates hearing about this.”
“I wouldn't be embarrassed, Evie. Like, at all,” he looks at her flatly.
She rolls her eyes and lays back down against him.
A few minutes later, she speaks up again. “So, you want to hit up some clubs tonight? Things always get hot and heavy on Valentine’s Day. Good night to pick-up.”
“It’s Wednesday, and I’ve got a game tomorrow,” he says, his voice hollow as he forces his eyes to stay on the screen.
“Lame,” she says, a relieved smile on her lips that he doesn't see.
Evie — March 2
When Evie comes to, she’s lying on her bed with her arm covering her eyes, panting. Her body still feels tingly, in the way it does after good, wild sex. It always leaves her a little dizzy and disoriented. She can hear the sound of heavy breathing next to her. She hums, pleased.
Her other outstretched hand is buried in soft hair. She tugs on a curl and smiles. She loves his curly hair. Evie has always had thick, straight hair, a blessing and a curse; it has never felt as soft as curly hair does. Her fingers twirl around the curl, playing with the springy coil.
She thinks maybe Tito will let his hair grow even longer. He looks so good with longer hair that forms actual curls. The way it falls in front of his eyes a bit makes him look so soft. She thinks about how he lays on the couch lazily, his hair splayed out on the cushion, and how his shirt rides up to show the sliver of skin above his low-slung sweats when he gets comfortable.
The urge to ask him if he’s going to cut his hair soon overtakes her exhaustion, and she moves her arm to look over.
“So—” Evie starts before she furrows her brows.
At that moment, she notices that instead of Tito’s baby blues, she's met with a pair of wide-eyed browns. Her entire body freezes as the night slams back into her consciousness.
The dancing, the flirting, the meaningful looks, the cab ride home, the sex. God, the sex was fucking good. Her limbs hum in agreement as her chest tightens.
Well, these eyes gaze at her lazily, warm and soft. Evie’s hand is still in her curly mess of hair. The first thing she thinks is that it's actually longer than Tito’s hair is now before she immediately banishes his name from her mind completely.
Evie can’t seem to relax her body enough to free her voice, which is caught in her throat.
Shit, what is her name?
Natalie? Natalia? Natasha? Nat for sure—
“Don’t worry,” Nat states, smirking, “I’m not staying. Just trying to catch my breath before leaving.”
Evie can’t help but feel unsettled and disoriented, but she forces her mind to quieten. Nat is really hot, and they did have a really good night. Slowly, Evie puts a coy smile back on her face and blinks slowly at her.
“You don’t have to leave? If you don’t want to. I didn’t mean to kick you out.”
Evie has absolutely no idea why she just said that. She has never asked a hook-up if they want to stay. It must show on her face because Nat laughs. She shakes her head and presses another heated kiss to Evie’s lips, reminding her why she feels like she’s still floating outside of her body.
“I’ll get going.” Nat shakes her head and stands up, looking for her clothes in the mess on the floor. Evie probably should've cleaned up a little before going out.
She leans up on her elbows and lets her eyes trail down Nat’s body. Her mind finally focuses, and she whistles. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay?”
Nat laughs.
“Yes, baby girl. I’ve got to go to work tomorrow. This was very good, though,” Nat says while putting on her clothes. “Don’t worry. I’m not going to ask for your number or when we’ll see each other again. So you don’t need to give me the spiel. I knew— know what this was.”
Evie laughs at the exaggerated wink Nat gives her. She feels a little lighter with relief at that.
“Can I use your bathroom, though? Before I go.”
“Yeah, it’s right through there.”
“Thanks.” Nat sends her a warm smile before slipping into the bathroom.
Evie lays back down and rubs her eyes. That was fucking weird, what the—
Her bathroom door flies open.
“What the fuck?” Natalie says, holding up Tito’s bread trimmer.
“What?”
“Do you have a boyfriend or something? Did you just fucking use me to cheat on someone?”
“No?” Evie sits up, confused.
“Don’t fucking lie to me. I was willing to overlook the men’s shoes and coat in your entryway; maybe they’re a friend’s. I was willing to overlook the sweatshirts and sweatpants strewn around your room. I figured maybe you just like being comfortable.”
“What?” she squeaks through the lump in her throat.
Nat powers through her interruption. “But there’s a fucking beard trimmer in there. Two toothbrushes. Two towels. A curly-defining gel that you definitely don’t use. And the—”
“No, you’re—”
“Are you honestly going to tell me you live here alone? What stupid fucking excuse are you going to give me, huh? This is a one-bedroom apartment, dude. Whoever’s shit this is, he's definitely not your roommate.”
Evie stares at her, stunned, mouth opening and closing.
“God, you know what. Save it. I don’t want to fucking know,” she says before storming out of the bedroom.
Evie hugs her knees in stunned silence, watching from her bed as Nat grabs her coat and shoes. She pleads with her brain for something to say and comes up empty.
Nat throws her one last dirty look, her face twisting in a scowl at her continued silence. “Seriously, fuck you, Gigi.”
The sound of the front door slamming makes Evie jump. She just sits there, staring into empty space for so long that she feels her butt go numb.
She flops back onto her bed, pressing the heels of her hands to her eyes.
“What the fuck just happened?” she says to her empty room.
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Weekend in Chicago
Day 0
Unusually, I didn't feel particularly anxious about this trip, though I still slept badly the night before departure. Although I left slightly ahead of schedule, I had a long wait for BART and then a long wait for the little mini-train to my terminal at the airport, and then the line for security was longer than I expected, so I only just had time to buy food for the flight. When I arrived at my gate, my group was already boarding. Since I’m usually at the airport 2 hours before departure, this came as a bit of a shock! But once I was on the plane, it all went smoothly. Nobody was in the middle seat next to me (I had a window), and I spent the flight reading a novel. I finished it just after we landed! [separate post coming about the book]
I landed at Chicago O’Hare around 8pm. Because it was such a short trip, I hadn’t checked a bag, which is practically unheard-of for me; I was proud of packing so light! Although it’s obvious, I still felt surprised at how quickly I could leave the airport since I didn’t have to wait for checked luggage! Because it was dark (and raining a little), I took a cab to my hotel, where Best Friend had already arrived. We went up to the room to drop off my stuff, then went out for dinner. This was a hip hotel in a hip neighborhood called River North, and we were decidedly not cool enough to stay there! However, we were also old enough not to give a shit!
By then it was 9pm (7pm for my body clock though), and we were very hungry. We had thought we would just go to a little ramen shop nearby, as surely at this hour restaurants would be emptying out, but it turned out to be packed. It was Saturday night, and I guess people in Chicago are back to going out at night. We struggled to find a restaurant that could seat us, but we eventually got a table at Hub 51. Chicago is a foodie town, and we enjoyed our meal, though the portion sizes were enormous.
After that, we returned to our hotel and went to bed soon afterwards.
Day 1
We had a leisurely start before heading out to grab breakfast en route to the Art Institute of Chicago, which was the main purpose of this weekend getaway. They had an exhibition of Remedios Varo, my favorite artist, called Science Fictions. It was fabulous. If you are in or near Chicago, I think you still have a week or two to catch this before it closes! I will be posting photos. I had only seen a few of the paintings in person before, and there were more paintings than I expected, along with a bunch of sketches. As always, seeing the paintings in person brought out details I hadn’t noticed when looking at reproductions of them, and in fact, I think there were some paintings I wasn’t familiar with at all. We spent quite a while in that exhibition before moving on to look at other works in the museum, including some great Georgia O’Keeffe paintings (I loved the landscapes) and quite a few Sargents (many from early in his career), the Chagall window, the Tiffany window, some Frank Lloyd Wright-designed things, and some furniture (some of which was great and some of which was hilariously hideous). We ate a late lunch in a sheltered courtyard café in the museum and then resumed looking at art.
After the museum, we wandered through Maggie Daley Park. It was late afternoon, and I did some birdwatching while Best Friend made a couple of phone calls. I saw a palm warbler! That was a new bird for me, and I also got a good look at a fairly distinctive bird but still couldn’t identify it. I took photos, and was later able to determine that it was an ovenbird, which is also a new one for me! There were lots of white-throated sparrows (uncommon where I live) and yellow-rumped warblers, as well as some northern cardinals (which don’t exist where I live).
We ate dinner at a deep-dish pizza place, which seemed mandatory while in Chicago. It was delicious! This restaurant makes single-person pizzas, which are cute (the fork and pen below are normal-sized and included for scale). I still couldn’t finish mine, so I brought ¼ of it back to the hotel (in a cute box!) to eat for breakfast.
We then returned to the hotel to pack and wind down.
Day 2
I had set my alarm for the ungodly hour of 6:45am, not because either of us had an early flight (we didn’t), but because we wanted to do something fun before heading to the airport. So we checked out of our hotel at 8:30, left our luggage, and took the metro (well, the el) to the 606, a repurposed elevated rail line that is now a sort of park/trail for bikes and pedestrians. Best Friend admired the architecture of the neighborhoods we were walking through, while I did some birdwatching. We then walked through Humboldt Park (more birdwatching, the highlights of which were a golden-crowned kinglet, wood ducks, lots of white-throated sparrows, and more northern cardinals, though there were also about 60 Canada geese, which was slightly terrifying!).
On our way back to the el, we stopped at Typica Café, which turned out to be Venezuelan. Best Friend had to attend a Zoom meeting for a half hour. I ate a delicious guava-cheese puff pastry, which is apparently a Venezuelan thing and which I highly recommend if you get the opportunity to have one! The hot chocolate was also exceptionally good; it was made using Venezuelan cocoa and, I think, a tiny bit of caramel syrup. It was excellent; not too sweet.
We then walked to the el and rode back to our hotel, picked up our luggage, walked to the pizza place so Best Friend could bring two frozen pizzas back for her husband and son, and then rode the el to the airport. We had gotten day passes for the Chicago el, which were a steal at $5.
At the airport we hugged goodbye as we were on different airlines. Going through security was fine, and I got to walk through the colored light underpass that is the only good thing at O'Hare. I bought snacks to eat on the plane. Boarding was a bit of a fiasco (they started boarding group 3 before group 2 for some reason) and very inefficient, but as we all reminded each other and ourselves, the only thing that really mattered was getting to our destination safely and approximately on time.
The flight itself was full and slightly delayed but fairly uneventful, and I got home via BART within 1.5 hours of landing. Yay! Although it was frankly bananas to fly halfway across the country for a 2-night stay, I feel very refreshed and energized by it and am glad I went, and particularly glad that Best Friend joined me. She's a great travel companion (despite her snoring), and I think it's the first trip we've taken together since she had her son nearly 13 (Edit: 14!) years ago.
I plan to post some photos from the trip. (I realise I didn't manage to do that after the Europe trip this summer, but this was only 2 days so it should be more manageable!)
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"This is what I do. Every time one of us moves on. I find them a star. That's where we go. Whoosh. Back to the stars."
One thing I really loved about this episode was a chance to show all the different grieving styles of the characters. It was definitely the "very special episode" of the bunch. So I present: the ghosts (and Alison) and how they grieve.
"Lots to sort out, I imagine. I can help if you like. Please may I help, I'd like to help."
First off we have Captain, who I feel any of us could have predicted. He throws himself into task after task, and I think it was actually pretty vulnerable how he kept asking Alison to give him things to do. He likes a distraction from his grief so he doesn't have to process it, and it was nice to see him actually 'break down' in a sense during the eulogy scene, dropping his stoic facade in a way he never would have done in earlier seasons. And the way he then comforts Julian... argh!
"Thank you for coming. I realise today that we've all been running away from the one thing that unites us all. The one thing that I think we've all been feeling. Grief."
I feel like Alison was kind of similar. Trying to go about her day as normal, doing tasks, except with her she doesn't have much of a choice, it would be pretty difficult for Mike to throw together an entire party by himself. But the way he took charge for her in the end was sweet, and she let herself feel the grief normally, while helping the ghosts out of their rut like normal.
"You know, today reminds me of when Maggie's cat died. She was so angry we had to hide the nuclear launch codes. I'm not angry with you lot."
Julian's struck a particular chord with me. His nitpicking, his need for "OOORRDAH!" in a world which doesn't make as much sense as it did a day ago. I feel like he doesn't exactly hide his grief, just channels it into bossiness and a different kind of frustration. Grief is frustrating. Death is frustrating. But it's easier for a devil may care guy like him to pretend that he's upset about something like misplaced library books than the loss of a friend, especially when during his political career showing vulnerability could be your downfall.
"She is finding it hard to process. But I'm just trying to explain it in a way she understands."
Pat actually took a pretty mature aproach. He helped Kitty through her own grieving process in a way which makes me feel like he's done this before? Maybe Daley lost his grandparents at some point and Pat helped make sense of the loss to his son. His "she might still be with us!" line feels like something he would have said to his kid before learning of what the afterlife truly entails. He plays the responsible figure, as always, but ended up spiraling a bit trying to spare Kitty's feelings. Like with the Captain, he also tries to be useful, but wasn't as panicked about throwing himself into it. 8/10 good grieving strategies.
"She's gone, Pat. She's gone."
Kitty... I feel bad for her honestly. It reminds me of the therapy episode, everyone trying to spare her feelings, but I'm glad she managed to come to terms with it in the end. It was really sweet how Pat reassured her, and her tearing up just made the scene.
"Alison, Mary's gone. She's actually gone! What are we to do?"
Fanny's big grief moment hit me the hardest honestly. When she turned around to fetch Mary so they could watch Loose Women together, and was left calling her name for a bit too long until she finally remembered, and then broke. Even went to Alison to vent about it during the party, unbecoming of a lady I'm sure, but I feel like in that moment she didn't care. In the end they were friends. And she's lost a good companion.
"Forgive me. But how do I..."
Thomas, oh boy. He wasn't simply grieving as much as he was overwhelmed by grief. Just the image of him sitting in the bathtub made me sad, because that is exactly what I would have pictured his grieving style to be like if you would have asked. And yes, he made it about himself as he makes all things, but once that was pointed out to him, he decided to be selfless instead. To do something much more appropriate for mourning Mary. It was a really great Thomas moment what he did with the eulogy, and made the final scene of the episode really touching.
We didn't get to see a lot of Humphrey, but honestly I think he'd be a little distant from it. Sort of "well it is what it is" like he is with most things.
"I've been around a long time. Like a really long time. I've seen this happen so much... can't do this every time. The pain? I deal with it my own way."
Robin's grief method was one I predicted from the beginning. The way he seems to not care, well he's been around the carousel a few times. He's desensitised in a way the others aren't. That being said, the ending while he named the stars, and picked one for her, they had a connection. Even if he's had a connection with thousands over the years, a connection is still a connection. He grieves in his own way, detached but still meaningful towards her memory.
Long story short, this episode ate my emotional state alive. Please feel free to add your own interpretations.
Pls reblog this took forever
#bbc ghosts#bbc ghosts spoilers#bbc ghosts series 4#bbc ghosts thomas#bbc ghosts kitty#ghosts bbc the captain#bbc ghosts captain#bbc ghosts pat#bbc ghosts fanny#bbc ghosts mary#bbc ghosts alison#bbc ghosts julian#bbc ghosts humphrey#bbc ghosts robin#six idiots
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Maggie Daley Park is really awesome lots of great fun spots
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If I had my way then Sydney would have done figure skating as a kid. And the back of house crew would go for a christmas trip to Maggie Daley Park outdoor rink and Richie would only be able to cling to the railing at the side to shuffle round because who the fuck wants to deliberately spend chicago winters somewhere even icier. And Syd would give him so so so much shit about it but she would also not stop skating in dead slow backwards crossovers beside him to do so
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Annual ice skating at @maggie.daley.park in #Chicago ⛸️☺️❤️🙌 (at Maggie Daley Park ice skating ribbon) https://www.instagram.com/p/CmDaRdvD8XK/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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The Nanny: Eddie Kingston and You
Part Two
Part 0ne
Apparently a pay per view is not just a one night event, as Renee, Stella, and you leave on Thursday night and are not flying back until Tuesday afternoon. Flying to Chicago was uneventful; well as uneventful with a baby could be. Jon will be flying in Friday night after an independent show.
Renee has nothing planned until Friday afternoon and so you are Baby free until than. You never have been to Chicago before, but the time difference is making you feel lazy and tired. So you decide to just sunbathe by the pool and catch up on some reading.
Walking to the pool, you cross through the lobby and see some dudes trying to throw mustard packets into a bowl. One guy is filming and a couple are talking and watching. It’s odd, but you don’t really think much it, except for thinking one of the guys watching in a black T-shirt and Yankees hat is really cute.
Friday afternoon and Saturday Renee and Jon are both really busy; One being interviewed and the other one doing the interviews. You have Stella both days and the two of you explore Chicago going to Maggie Daley Park, The Field Museum and Navy Pier. While going in and out of the hotel, you notice a lot of cute men, none of however compare to the guy you seen the first night.
You had never been backstage at any type of show, you were not expecting it to be so busy and filled with people. It was definitely overwhelming. You knew Renee wanted to catch up with friends and network a little bit, so you were more than happy to just entertain Stella and stay in the background. At one point you had to Change Stella and when you came out of the bathroom with her, Renee was gone.
Renee had told you that if you had gotten lost to either go back to Jon’s locker room or catering. You didn’t feel comfortable going into Jons locker room, so Stella and you followed the signs to catering. This was definitely the center of backstage. People rushing in and out and others sitting down relaxing. You grabbed a banana for Stella to suck and drool over and sat at the last open table.
After Stella had destroyed the banana, making a complete mess of herself, and cleaning her up; you gave her a bottle and lay her down in her stroller fast asleep. You checked your phone and saw Renee texted you making sure Stella and you were okay. After replying telling her yes and you two were in catering, you started reading a book you packed in Stella’s diaper bag.
You were a couple of chapters in your book when Jon walked into the room. He bent over to kiss to a still sleeping Stella, asking how her day was going, than asking “You doing okay kid?” Rolling your eyes at him calling you kid, you assured him you were fine.
Than the cute guy from the hotel lobby walked in; he was in wrestling gear and even more beautiful up close. Jon said something about you eating and than he was yelling. “Yo Eddie. EDDIE,” you watched as hotel lobby guy walked over. “Eddie this is Stella’s nanny. Y/N this is Eddie.”
Eddie gave you a head nod, you suddenly felt very shy and gave him a small wave. Jon takes your book from out of your hands. “Y/N go with Eddie and get some food. He’s never shy about eating.”
You followed Eddie to the buffet table trying to play it cool and not snort laugh when Eddie yells back at your boss “fuck you.” He hands you a plate, you start noticing all these little things about Eddie. Like how he smells so incredibly good, his one knuckle is fucked up but that only adds to your attraction, and how his eyes change colors. At the lobby they were green and now they are blue. He doesn’t touch you but his hand hovers over your lower back as he guides you over to the table.
When you been eating for a while Jon ask how it is. You squint your eyes and say “it’s good but not as good as my pasta was.” Before leaving for Chicago Renee had taken you and Stella out for lunch. You ordered the most amazing pasta and brought the leftovers back to their house for lunch the next day. But after looking forward to it all morning, it was missing from the fridge “I should have stabbed you.”
Eddie let’s out a bark of laugh, “I’ve never heard anyone speak to you like that before Mox.” Your stomach tightens at sound of his laugher, you want to keep making him laugh. And you also wish Jon would go away so you can spend time with Eddie on your own.
But you don’t have that kind of luck. Just as Jon leaves to do some type of interview. Renee walks into catering and joins you two at the table. “Eddie, I have a huge favor to ask,” Renee explains that she ordered a playhouse for Stella but Jon won’t be home to build it and she wants it up for a photoshoot she’s having done. “Is there anyway you could come over?”
Eddie tells her not to worry about it, he will build it no problem. She give him a date and he says he will be there. You secretly hope that you will be working that day.
Renee looks at her Apple Watch and sees its time to get going back to the hotel. Stella needs to get to bed and Renee needs to watch a hockey game. Renee tells Eddie she will text him all the details for the playhouse later. You say goodbye and say it was nice meeting you to Eddie. And you feel your heart melt when he replies back. “You too sweets.”
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Frank Gehry's BP Pedestrian Bridge connecting Millennium Park and Maggie Daley Park in Chicago, Illinois, USA
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4/18/17
#chicago#climbing#Maggie Daley Park#photographers on tumblr#original photography#canon photography q#lensblr#pws#lux lit
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Clouds (No. 781)
Chicago
#skyline#BP Pedestrian Bridge#Millennium Park#Maggie Daley Park#USA#Jay Pritzker Pavilion#Frank O. Gehry#architecture#skyscraper#travel#vacation#summe 2016#clouds#overcast#sky#original photography#cityscape#tourist attraction#landmark#Midwestern USA#Great Lakes Region#Lake Shore Drive#the Loop
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Chicago Day 2: Millennium Park Redux + Riverwalk
After the Art Institute, Adam had a gigantic lunch at Shake Shack:
We had to negotiate area crowds who were gathered along the river for Lollapalooza, but we finally made our way back into Millennium Park to see another of Chicago’s famous public art installations, Jayne Plensa’s Crown Fountain. Here’s a description from the city’s website:
“The fountain consists of two 50-foot glass block towers at each end of a shallow reflecting pool. The towers project video images from a broad social spectrum of Chicago citizens, a reference to the traditional use of gargoyles in fountains, where faces of mythological beings were sculpted with open mouths to allow water, a symbol of life, to flow out. Plensa adapted this practice by having faces of Chicago citizens projected on LED screens and having water flow through an outlet in the screen to give the illusion of water spouting from their mouths. The collection of faces, Plensa's tribute to Chicagoans, was taken from a cross-section of 1,000 residents.”
The fountain was especially beautiful on this gorgeous Chicago day. (We have had great weather our whole trip.)
We found a very funky mirror feature in Maggie Daley Park that we hadn't seen the night before:
And then we sat for a bit in the cool breeze of the Chicago Riverwalk:
Adam said this was the biggest traffic light he'd ever seen:
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Downtown Teen Curfew Remains This Summer Despite Mayor Johnson Saying He's Not A Fan
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Miss Maine USA 2024 results: Juliana Morehouse crowns Anne Baldridge in South Portland
beauty pageant: Miss Maine USAedition: 73rddate: March 10, 2024venue: Sheraton Sable Oaks, South Portland, Maine, United Statesnational membership: Miss USAcandidates: 12
FINALISTS
PLACEMENTNAME (HOMETOWN)Top 12Jennie Daley (Downeast)Vanesa Pelletier (Fort Kent)Savanna Colson (Hancock County)Hannah Feliciano (Hermon)Kelsey Sewell (Houlton)Annabelle Richard (Orono)Maggie Lloyd (Windham)Top 5Anne…
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Winter Wonderland: Ice Skating at Maggie Daley Park!
🌟 Glide through winter at Maggie Daley Park's Ice Skating Ribbon in Downtown Chicago.
✅Enjoy the stunning skyline backdrop.
✅Free admission Mon-Thurs and Fri-Sun at 11am.
✅$5 admission other times with own skates, or $16–$22 with rental.
✅Open through March, with special holiday hours.
Reserve your spot now! 📞Call (800) 967-9416 or visit Blackcareverywhere.com. 🎄⛸️
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