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#like Eddie likes posting to Tiktok but he’s not blind to the negative impact it has
morganbritton132 · 1 year
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Eddie decides that he wants to do a whole Day in the Life of a Middle School Math Teacher thing when Steve gets the go-ahead that Eddie can come talk to his class. Steve thinks that’s dumb because it’s not like he has an interesting life.
The first video in the series starts the night before. Eddie is filming Steve while they get ready for bed (mostly removing the five hundred pillows Steve insists they need
on their bed) while he warns Eddie that these kids are not like The Party. Middle school kids have not developed empathy yet and they’re mean in like, an accurate way. It’s like having 16 to 22 Erica Sinclairs every class period.
It then cuts to the morning where Steve is lecturing Eddie on the do’s and don’t’s. DO encourage students to find safe creative outputs to express themselves. DO talk about your struggles in school and how you overcame them. DON’T tell them about the illegal shit we used to do. DON’T antagonize student athletes and, for the love of god, DON’T climb on the tables. This lecture spans every room in their house as they both get ready.
The second video is filmed inside of seventh grade English teacher, Mrs Casal’s Honda Civic. Steve doesn’t drive anymore and Eddie insisted on joining his teacher carpool, a decision he has come to regret and Patty Casal drives like she wants them all to die. He’s squeezed in the back between Ozzy and another teacher that keeps fussing with his jacket collar.
The whole video is just zoomed in on Eddie’s face while you can hear four middle school teachers telling the most batshit insane stories you’ve ever head. The caption is: Why am I having RV flashbacks?
The third Tiktok is just Eddie filming Steve reviewing the last test with the students before Eddie’s Q&A. The text overlay says, “Why is this so hot?” Hot for Teacher is playing.
Eddie doesn’t actually film his little Q&As with Steve’s classes because it feels weird to film kids he doesn’t know, but a lot of the students do so videos go up on Tiktok of Eddie answering each question sincerely while still maintaining his usual chaotic Eddie charm. A student called his music old and Eddie flipped backwards off his chair, grabbing his chest, “You wound me! Rock n Roll never gets old and it never dies!”
He does talk about the hurtles he had to jump to get into the music industry, how his uncle bought him his first guitar and that he had to teach himself because they couldn’t afford lessons. He talked about school and his three repeats of senior year. He talked about how Dustin and Nancy sat down with him and worked out a way to teach him that actually worked. One student asked why he was with a math teacher when he could be married to a celebrity and Eddie tells them, “Don’t let the dorky sweater fool you. Mr H, over there is a total bad A S S. Coolest guy I’ve ever met. He’s saved my life.”
Someone does try to ask about the murder allegations but Steve shuts that down so fast no one dares to try again. It gives Eddie the worst case of heart eyes ever seen by man.
Steve’s class before lunch asks Eddie if he wants to eat with them and he says of course. It’s only by good fortune that one of the students catch on video Steve calling ‘Mr Munson’ back to his desk and then tells Eddie that if he climbs on a table, Steve will give him detention.
Eddie does, in fact, stand on the tables. He gives a big dramatic lecture about forced conformity but instead of talking about jocks and basketball, he talks about instagram and Tiktok and how it’s constantly hounding kids into looking a certain way, acting a certain way, and it’s destroying creativity. And that’s what’s killing the kid’s.
And Steve does, in fact, walk into the cafeteria mid-way through this speech. He lets him get through the important bits before calling out for Edward Munson to get off the table.
Someone post this whole speech on Tiktok and Eddie duets the video from detention because Steve was not kidding.
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