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shinjaeha · 2 years

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bad buddy ep 12 (thoughts)

first things first, I AM NEVER GONNA ASSUME ANYTHING EVER AGAIN.

me, this ep: we've been tricked, we've been backstabbed and we've been quite possibly, bamboozled.

i still cannot believe how much they made me bawl after ep 11. i was broken for a WHOLE WEEK...absolutely convinced they’d broken up, but apparently my gut can’t be trusted WHATSOEVER, and they fooled me completely. if there ever was a start to my villain origin story, it’s this right here 😭 fake break up theorists out there, how does it feel to have such a big brain?? wish i could relate!!

but paint that clown makeup all over me bc i’ll take it if it means that pat and pran are happy (and god, i’m just so glad that they’re happy...this is the only outcome i have ever wanted for them bc they deserve it all after everything they’ve been through).

if you read my last ep 11 post, i guess most of it is all for nothing now, but i still stand by how much i loved that ep!! even if i ended up being wrong about most things �� i guess the lesson i’ve really learnt here is not to jump to conclusions. i SHOULD have known better considering bad buddy has been surprising me at every turn, yet i still fell for it, and that’s on me. i also can’t deny that i was swayed by all the surrounding discourse as well.

and tbh i don’t think anyone should feel like too much of a fool for falling for the break up trap bc the ep was def purposefully crafted to make us feel like something was ‘off’...that bittersweetness we felt wasn’t fake. the angst was still intentional. even if pat and pran didn’t ACTUALLY end up breaking up, the uncertainty they were feeling...and knowing that going home meant having to confront the reality of their relationship, was still very real. we obviously got a skimmed over version of what they went through over the last four years, but they didn’t know at the time how everything was going to pan out. and even though they ended up staying together, there’s still that sense of sadness that, at the time, they were never going to reconcile everything completely with their parents. so all those tears we cried weren’t for nothing bc they still ended up having to lose something in order to stay together. they still weren’t able to be as open about their relationship as the two of them wanted.

in my last post, i had a few misgivings about the fake break up theory, but i think this ep did a good job of addressing those issues. firstly, pran telling his friends about their break up was one of the reasons i was convinced about their break up (that damn preview!!)...but finding out that wai knew it was a lie, and it WAS a fake out all along, clears that one up for me bc i knew that pran wouldn’t have lied to wai again after their last fight...and he didn’t.

secondly, i thought that their parents would be mad if they hid things again, but in the end, their parents weren’t as heartless as i thought they were going to be (and that’s one thing i’m super grateful about...things aren’t exactly peachy, and we don’t know if they ever will be, but their children’s happiness is more important to them than the feud between them...so if they have to look the other way for now, they’ll look the other way).

thirdly, i thought that hiding their relationship would just mean a rehash of ep 7 again, but that obviously wasn’t the case at all. the narrative i was expecting was one that i’d seen time and time again (break up, time skip, reunion). it was all i had to go off, and i’m genuinely so glad that bad buddy changed my perception on this. honestly, the time skip helped this along a lot since they didn’t really focus on the hiding this time (they only showed some brief scenes of this). and by the time they’d bided their time and graduated from uni, things became a lot easier for them. although they were still technically hiding their relationship, they didn’t have to hide it in the same way they’d had to back in uni. not to mention, over the years, it seemed to have become more of an open secret than anything else. there were times they tried harder to hide it (eg. high school reunion), but for the most part, the hiding became a lot less subtle overall. like they were becoming progressively less afraid of getting caught. in the end, they’re still able to go out and have fun with their close friends, while keeping it a secret from their parents (who know about them already...so it’s not like they were even that stealthy on that front anyway).

and lastly, the emotional impact still landed pretty deeply (since a lot of us thought they’d broken up at the beginning), only it threw us off balance instead, and then rewarded us with the fluffiest ep of them all. i have never known what to expect with this show, and the fact that it did THAT at the end of ep 11, and then turned around and pulled a “just kidding” on us (the fact that that’s basically been p’aof’s catchphrase on soonvijarn...how did i not REALISE)...that was the real genius in the end. it wasn’t how they reframed the ep 11 ending with a different context, or the subtleness of the (non) break up, but it was how they’d misdirected us the whole time instead. they pulled one over on us, and for the majority of us, they succeeded. we, the audience, were just like everyone else in pat and pran’s life (aside from wai, korn, ink and paa). we were tricked by them in the same way, and it’s actually kind of brilliant.

it turned out ep 11 wasn’t cursed at all, but they played us on our assumptions that it would be. and in doing that, it made me cry more than any of the cursed ep 11′s i’ve ever seen. so many of us thought it was a breakup bc it’s the kind of narrative that we’re used to and they knew that, so they played on our expectations…and then turned around and spun the narrative an entirely different way instead. i thought the plot twist was at the end of ep 11, but the REAL plot twist was what we got in ep 12 all along…and the most of us didn’t see it coming at all. it rewrote everything i thought i knew. i’m constantly praising bad buddy for being different from so many other dramas that i didn’t even think that it would set itself apart in this way too.

one of the mock trailer taglines said it best: “their mission is to fool the world”. and fool the world they did. they basically told us how this was going to go from the very start.

i’m predisposed to think that everything leans more angsty than it actually does, so when we STARTED OFF with the four years later time skip, i was worried ngl.

but pat waking up with only one alarm showed me how much he’s grown up!! such a contrast from ep 2 when he kept snoozing it 😂 pran’s influence :’) wish i could grow up and learn this trait too so i don’t have to set four alarms in order to wake up every morning...

pat looking at his toothbrush and reminiscing back to that time when pran put toothpaste on it for him bc he was trying to make it up to him...when i watched this for the first time, i was SO SAD. rewatching it now, i just feel scammed haha.

it’s so cute to me that after all these years, pran still has that habit of smirking at himself in the mirror after he’s done washing up. he’s so adorable. even now as a hotshot architect in singapore.

when i was first watching this, i do remember thinking that pran didn’t seem that sad considering they broke up?? which prob should have been my first clue...but i was just chalking that up to him thinking about their time fondly (and NOT the fact that they were likely sending flirty texts to one another the whole time i was feeling sad omg).

it’s always so amusing to me how, to make everyone look older, they just style their hair up so you can see their foreheads now 😂

okay, pat reminiscing back to all his old memories with pran still kind of makes me sad even now bc, even though they’re together, long distance relationships are tough :( it’s not a break up, but not being able to be with the person that you love (and esp when you’re as deeply in love with one another as pat and pran are)...that hurts. and everything really does remind you of them.

not how the one time i expect waikorn to happen, they don’t. but i’m actually fine with that. i love that they ended up being good friends (and buying the bar together). everyone’s grown up so much since the start of this show ;;; it’s only been a couple years since they graduated, but it feels like it’s been ten years.

at the time, i genuinely thought they were just being considerate of pat’s feelings by not bringing pran up at this point...and the more i think about it now, the funnier it gets tbh.

no more door hanger on pran’s old dorm door :(((((((( that hit me hard. i can’t believe how attached they made me to that thing (and all of pran’s smiley faces).

inkpaa are glowing this whole ep!!!!!! people in love always look different, and i love seeing my fave girls still going strong :’) also, i love seeing paa boss pat around now too. after all the laundry she did for him back then, it’s what she deserves!!

why are like 80% of the photos on the reunion noticeboard just of pat and pran though...did ink take them all 😂

something i really appreciate about this ep is all the little references they made to the mock trailer. i have SUCH fondness for that trailer bc it shook me to my core when gmmtv first announced that ohm and nanon were doing bad buddy together. the references feel a little bit like a tribute to it. like they’re ending bad buddy the way they started it, and i love that so much.

like how pat’s friend mentions that pat used to put his boogers in his mouth (which is what pat did to korn in the mock trailer haha). although they changed a lot of it up (eg. most of the high school setting in general, and korn being his uni friend instead), they still retained bits and pieces of that trailer in the drama itself.

I’M STILL NOT OVER HOW MUCH THEY PLAYED US ALL DURING THE REUNION. i’m telling you pat and pran 1000% have a roleplay kink and should have majored in performing arts fr!!!!! they had me feeling so miserable with all their sad gazing at one another (esp pat!! pran looked more fond than anything), and then the way they kept ALMOST talking to one another, but not actually talking...only to find out that it was all a ruse and that pat prob only looked more sad than pran bc pran told him he wasn’t staying over at his place that night...that, and the airport mix up...they’re so dramatic 😭

i can’t believe how i was talking about how drama free they both were in my last post, and then they pulled this on me. though i guess, it’s fake drama so it doesn’t really count...

tbh when you rewatch this, it really does look like pran just wants to jump pat’s bones during the whole reunion...so knowing that he caves and goes to pat’s place after this anyway puts all those longing looks into context. i can’t believe they almost made me CRY during this part...and it was essentially just the two of them roleplaying and being horny...i hate it here.

oh god, the high school flashback scenes!!!!!!!! i’ve mentioned time and time again how much i adore their high school scenes. there’s such an innocence to them. if we don’t get a sequel for this drama, i’d honestly love a prequel. i’d love to know more about their relationship in high school, and how they went from annoying one another (or lbr, pat annoying pran) to becoming ‘sort of’ friends. pat making fun of pran on the guitar SCREAMS boy annoying his crush bc he likes him (but doesn’t quite know it yet).

pat was behaving like this when people were around, but then being secretly nice and cutting guitar picks from his own ID card for pran when they were alone...i’d fall in love too, pran 😭

they didn’t get to finish performing 'just friends?’ together the first time, but they finally get to finish it together now :’) i love that for them. it’s the closure i needed for their high school days.

they had me so frustrated when they were leaving the reunion and kept glancing at one another, but not actually talking. i was so stressed!!!!! when pran knocked on the door, i had a feeling it was him, but then the big reveal happened and i experienced every single emotion i’ve ever felt in my life all at once. you don’t understand how i SCREAMED.

most overwhelming of all though, was the pure happiness and relief i felt at seeing the two of them still together. i was completely and utterly fooled, BUT this is the one time that i’ve never been more happy to have been betrayed like this. they got me good, but there’s nothing i love more than knowing that pat and pran actually stayed together through everything, and that their love has only gotten stronger over the years.

i will never be over pat saying he should have ate more at the reunion, pran showing up at pat’s door as the ‘food’, and then pat yanking him inside. i can’t believe them omg.

of all their sponsors, my fave has to be the nivea ones. they’re always SO cute and in love when they’re wiping each other’s faces (even back when pat didn’t realise he was in love with pran yet). but now, it feels even cuter knowing that they’ve been in a solid relationship for years.

i love it soooooo much when pran’s the one expressing his jealousy. it’s so adorable!!!!!!!! pran’s “our sweetness is gone”, and then pat squeezing his face and calling him the cutest...he’s absolutely right and he should say it 😭

it does make me a little sad that they still feel like they have to hide their relationship even though they’ve been together for years, but at the same time, i also kind of love how it’s become this little game for the two of them. like the hiding doesn’t make them feel uncomfortable like before, it’s just them having fun with it...keeping it a secret that’s only between the both of them.

PAT’S NOTICEBOARD SHRINE. he’s SUCH a romantic...it’s so unbearably sweet of him. all their photos, post its, postcards, smiley face ping pong lights, ID cards, the GUITAR PICK...it makes me feel so full. i can feel their love in every single item on that board. it’s just so beautifully rich in the history of their entire relationship. the love is so abundantly clear. MY HEART IS SO SOFT FOR THEM.

then the way they circle back to the very beginning again and how they introduced one another in the first ep?? only this time the way they talk about one another is completely different bc it’s the two of them telling us their own love story, instead of the words they’ve heard from their parents’ mouths about each other. now it’s just them and only them.

that shot of them as kids in front of their houses, and then the transition to them coming back from their trip last ep...i know that it turned out well in the end, but even just seeing them in that position, still makes my chest ache. the emotional damage was very real that whole week, and it still pains me when i think about how things COULD have ended up.

pran’s face as he pretends to cry after lying about the break up is so funny even though i still hate the two of them for putting me through a week of torture!!!!!

thinking about it, it must have been so weird for their faculties/friends that weren’t wai and korn...like a week ago, pat was basically proposing to pran in front of everyone, and now they’ve broken up and are pretending like the other doesn’t exist 😭

pran working on his architecture project (while pat pretends to sleep in his room) is another shout out to the mock trailer!! i always wondered if we were ever gonna get a scene like this, so i’m glad we got it despite how brief it was.

the fact that they went back to the village after they graduated to celebrate with uncle tong and junior makes me SO HAPPY. they obviously couldn’t celebrate together with their parents or friends bc they’re still in hiding, so it’s just really nice to know that they have their found family to fall back on...and they get to be as open with them as they want :’)

PAT KISSING PRAN’S DIMPLES IS MY FAVE THING IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.

pran’s sweater game this whole ep is on point!! i love the sweater he wears when pat drops him off at the airport. also, the way he wiped his scent all over that shirt for pat...people in love stink smh.

pat sending pran a shirtless toilet selfie in the middle of his meeting pls 😂

one thing i really love about this ep (though there are MANY), is that pran’s so vocal about how much he just wants to climb pat like a tree. i literally CHOKED when he said he waited a whole year and called pat out on only lasting five minutes omg. cut the poor guy some slack...he’s been waiting a year for this too. i can’t even blame him for being too excited haha.

“it’s a long night tonight” i cannot stand them!!!!!!!!!!

triple date time!! even if waikorn aren’t dating (though they might as well be). it’s still so funny to me that they actually ended up buying the bar together. how the tables have turned :)

(sidenote, but i find the shirt wai’s wearing here hilarious bc it’s a ‘deakin university security’ shirt...and that’s a random uni in australia?? it’s also one of the unis that i actually studied at. it was the LAST thing i was expecting to see on this show...where are they getting all these shirts from????? pat’s had some very interesting ones too...i love all the clothing choices on this show so much).

paa being jealous and ink being clingy THEY’RE TOO CUTE...i’m so in love with them and that will never change. i’m so sad that we won’t get more inkpaa now that the series is over...they deserve the world!!

not korn and wai being the ones breaking up bar fights now...who would have thought. it’s payback for all the fights they caused in the earlier eps for sure.

pat and pran being so loud about their love in this bar. i just want what they have ;;; i adore seeing them be this open in front of the people that their close to. at least they get to have this little piece of the public, even if they can’t be fully open about their relationship in every way (yet).

this entire bar scene just makes me feel so full and happy.

pran ordering an extra wonton bc he knows pat will steal his food. cute.

when they talk about their parents, it does feel a little bittersweet. pran might understandably be a bit more distant from his parents than before, but it still seems like they get along okay. pat’s relationship with his parents though (particularly with his dad) seems to have deteriorated quite a bit. he mentioned previously that they fought a lot when they were working together too. after everything that happened, this makes sense. when you find out that someone that you looked up to so much did something to disappoint you so deeply (like pat’s dad did), it’s extremely difficult for your relationship to ever go back to the way things were. that’s why there always seems to be this tinge of sadness whenever pat talks about his parents/the family business.

this is prob the most realistic thing about this ep for me. things can’t ever be the same, and they can be cordial with one another, but the respect won’t ever be what it was. which is honestly what pat’s dad deserves imo. it’s a shame bc we always want all outcomes to be perfect, but things don’t always turn out that way, and this feels incredibly true to life.

it’s a nice gesture that pran still buys liquor for pat’s dad though. like, even if they can’t love each other openly in front of their parents, he’s still being respectful to them. it seems like pran doesn’t want to see pat’s relationship with his parents to feel so broken too (esp if that makes pat sad), so he’s making an effort. not to fix things exactly, bc who knows if things will ever truly be fixed...but to make things more bearable for pat and his parents. like he’s at least trying to help bridge the divide between them with this gift.

the “let’s go home” and “good luck, buddy”...they made me cry until i had no more tears left last ep bc of this, and now they’re smiling as they say it again???????? THE AUDACITY OF THESE TWO. I’M DONE.

pat running over, sniff kissing pran right in front of their houses, continuing to blow kisses at him, and THEN saying “bye” in the loudest voice possible...and they STILL think their parents don’t know about their relationship...guys, come on...

i have to say, one thing that i really do like about bad buddy as a whole is the lack of homophobia in this world. like i totally understand why this needs to be addressed in other dramas, but i like that it isn’t the main focus or conflict in this one...it’s just really nice to see that sort of casual acceptance. like ink and paa being cute around paa’s parents and no one making it a big deal. their relationship is treated with such normalcy (as it should be), and it makes me happy. ink calling paa’s dad “papa”, and paa’s mum preparing fruit for all of them...the absolute cutest.

do i wish pat and pran were given the same courtesy by their parents? of course. but i've always liked that the root of the conflict isn’t that their parents are homophobic...the basis of it all has always been the family rift instead.

pat coming home exactly at the same time pran does?? and then giving his dad the gift from his ‘friend’ abroad?? his parents aren’t stupid...they can connect the dots. they’re barely even hiding anything at this point (and it seems to me like pat kind of knows that too??). esp based on his father’s reaction to the gift. thank god for pat mother’s trying to smooth the awkwardness over (and ink and paa for helping with that).

the dinner scene is so sweet to me bc it shows us yet again just how much pat’s grown throughout the series. in ep 1, he was using the serving spoon to feed himself and stealing fried chicken before his sister even had a chance to take any herself. now, he’s making sure that everyone (his dad, paa, ink) are all well fed instead of focussing on himself. his relationship with pran has made him a lot more considerate of the people around him, and it’s so lovely to see the maturity in him now. even his dad seems to realise how much he’s changed, both personally and professionally, which imo makes things feel a lot more promising for their future.

i think it’s pretty clear how pat’s dad drinking the alcohol (a gift from pran), represents him slowly inching his way into accepting the both of them. this feels very real imo. it’s been years, and based on their balcony escapades and how LOUD the two of them are, their parents have likely known about their lie for a long, long time...but time does heal. and baby steps still mean progress, no matter how slow going.

he refuses the drink in pat’s presence, but drinks it when he’s no longer there. for me personally, this has to be one of the most relatable asian parent experiences ever. in all my years on this earth, i don’t think my parents have ever once apologised or admitted they were wrong for anything they were at fault for in my presence. but they’ll show they feel bad in actions (like pat’s dad accepting the alcohol, or pran’s mum leaving the guitar on pran’s bed). it’s always in these quiet actions/gestures, like they’re trying without saying it out loud. and the way that this show demonstrates this feels extremely realistic to me.

every time i rewatch this ep, this is the part where i start tearing up...when pran’s mum goes to make pran’s bed for him, and then she sees that picture of pran when he was a child, it ALWAYS gets to me. that’s her little boy, and she loves him. wants the best for him. wants him to be HAPPY. she knew what her husband and son were murmuring about the whole time, and it’s taken a long time, but the symbolism of her leaving that guitar on his bed for him just resonates so deeply with me. acceptance comes in stages. music has always made pran happy, so it’s just nice to see her realise that that’s the most important thing to her of all. she hated pran playing the guitar bc she saw it as him defying her, but she finally realises that she has to just let him be. she can’t keep controlling him forever bc it will never make him happy...be it the guitar, or pat. he’s a grown up now...with a steady job and in a loving, long-term relationship. he’ll always be her little boy, but he’s an adult now. independent, and more than capable of making his own decisions.

i also love how they included that scene where pat’s dad puts the mail in her mailbox for her, and pran’s mum sees it. it’s the little things. he looks at that line painted between their rubbish bins and see that it’s faded with time, just like how all the anger and resentment between them, while still there, doesn’t feel as strong anymore. not when their children are in love with each other. not when their children mean more to them than that animosity they’ve held onto for so long. we don’t know how things will go with their parents in the future, but based on this ep, i feel hopeful. one day, when they have to stop hiding, pat and pran will eventually need to confront their parents about their relationship...and i want to believe that by that point, their parents will understand and accept them fully the way they deserve. in the meantime, they’re still getting there, little by little. what happened between their parents will likely never heal in the same way (the scars will always be there), but i’d like to think that they’ll eventually be able to put aside those differences for the sake of their children and their happiness, so i’m choosing to look at this with optimism.

pran looking over at pat’s room and playing ‘our song’...he’s like a siren luring his prey 😂 he KNOWS pat’s about to climb over that balcony to sneak into his room :’)

pat literally falling on the roof, and the two of them singing and laughing so loudly like that...they must have known somewhat at that point that their parents weren’t clueless. they’re barely even trying to hide anymore. it’s just that no one, child or parent, is ready to approach that topic yet.

but it does make me feel a lot more at ease knowing that their parents have known this whole time, and never did anything to force them apart. when pran’s mum hears the two of them laughing, hears how happy her son is with pat, and it makes her smile?? it really warms my heart up so much. i don’t tend to cry when i’m happy, but that scene is just so touching to me, and it brings me to tears every time.

i love how even NOW, pran still uses wai to make pat jealous haha.

the two of them singing together...this scene is one of the CUTEST scenes in this whole drama ;;; you can just see how truly, madly, deeply in love they are with one another...it’s been four years, and in that time, they’ve only fallen harder for each other. they’re just so content and open here. this ep was so full of moments like this. they’ve been through so much together, and it’s only strengthened their relationship...it really shines through here most of all just how confident, happy, and secure everything is for them right this moment.

crying over how pat caresses pran’s cheek (dimple!!), kisses him on the forehead, and just continues to hold his face as they bob their heads and sing along. it’s so, so, so lovely.

at the end of the day, i realise now that i just underestimated everyone. pat, pran, and even their parents. i was too caught up on their parents being SO against them that i didn’t think that their parents would be human enough to actually understand their children’s perspective on this (and not be selfish like they were for most of pat and pran’s lives). that they’d be big enough to look past themselves and let their children lives their own lives. things aren’t exactly perfect, but it doesn’t feel impossible anymore, and i really like how natural this development feels.

but the thing i think i underestimated most of all, is the strength of pat and pran’s love for one another. i kept thinking that a break up had to happen bc of their circumstances, and i still believe that even if they HAD broken up, it would have beautiful bc it would have been done in love. but knowing that they actually stayed together makes it even better for me bc it's love either way. just love. always love. and the fact that they were strong and stable enough to stay together despite everything, makes me realise that their love really is so much stronger than i had originally thought. the moment they got together, they didn’t even break up once :’)

i said in my last post that fate always brings them together, but in this instance, they CHOSE to be together and that’s infinitely more incredible to me. even with all the uncertainty, they decided for themselves to stick together bc they couldn’t give each other up...they didn’t even NEED fate for this bc it was all them, and i don’t think you can get a more beautiful ending (or beginning, really) than that.

okay, pat groaning in pain as he climbs in and out of their balconies is literally just me doing any sort of physical activity nowadays 😂

the score during the tin can scene is one of my FAVES. it gives off the perfect amount of nostalgia...like i can just hear it and my chest aches. i remember they played it during that high school flashback scene where they were writing 'just friends?’ together, and it gave me the same feeling back then that it does now.

this is another scene that i can never get through without tears...the way it transitions back to them as children as they talk on the tin cans. we’ve seen that SO MUCH has changed (their careers, their university, their friends and their lives, their parents attitude towards them) except for the way that they feel for each other. pat mentions at their high school reunion (”but some things can never change”), and just like how it relates to what uncle tong told them in the previous ep, their love has never wavered. this will never change. they’re still those two young boys from all those years ago, always connected. always in love. nothing could touch my heart more than this.

this is honestly the best usage of a time skip that i’ve ever seen in a drama. it’s so much better than how i thought they were going to use it. as expected, they ended up maturing...but they did so while still being a part of one another’s lives, choosing to grow together. i feel like it’s pretty rare to find time skips where the couple stays together throughout?? but bc they stayed together the whole time, it doesn’t feel like it’s rushed anything about their relationship in the way that most time skips tend to.

i’m always such a blubbering mess at this point, so i’m glad they gave us that last scene of them on pat’s rooftop to lighten the mood again!!

something i love about this particular scene is that, in the last ep during their ‘honeymoon’, the drinking game they played involved them (mainly pat) asking one another questions so they could get to know each other better...but the drinking game in this ep has changed to them answering questions about one another. i love that it shows us how much their relationship has developed since then. they know each other even better now, enough so they can answer all these questions about one another and their relationship. but i also like how there are still questions that they don’t know about each other. it shows that there’s still so much more room for them to grow and learn about one another, and now we know they have a whole future ahead of them to do that :’)

the kisses in this ep are so satisfying. pat really lays them on pran thick 😂 he really loves those dimples.

i also just realised that the first night pat slept over at pran’s place (the day after his birthday!!), was also the night that he broke pran’s heart. i wonder if pat sees this as a fond memory, but pran sees it as a sad one, and that’s also why he never really assigned any significance to the date (and doesn’t remember it)? then again, pran also seems to be more forgetful than pat in general, so maybe that’s just me overthinking things as usual 😅

i love that, despite how competitive the two of them are, they switch the game around so they’re letting one another win instead. it’s like they’re both following pat’s “when i have a lover, i always let them win” philosophy, and i ESPECIALLY love that it’s pran that introduces this rule this time around.

PRAN WAS SO READY FOR THAT KISS...he looked so confused when pat was stalling omg.

ngl i kind of lost my mind a little when i heard pat singing same page...this was BY FAR my favourite reference to the mock trailer. I COULDN’T BELIEVE IT!! same page was my second most listened to song last year BECAUSE of the bad buddy mock trailer...i was always hoping that they’d play it in the drama, but i didn’t think it was ever gonna happen. that was such a cute little acknowledgement for all the fans that have been there since bad buddy’s announcement. i loved it!!

same page was the song that started it all (the wave of nostalgia hitting me when i remember just HOW excited all of us were when the first trailer dropped, and ohm and nanon’s entrance with it playing in the background as we learnt that they were going to be in bad buddy together 😭). pat singing a line from it to close out the drama is like we’ve come full circle. like we’re finally back home.

and then their kiss to top it all off was just the cherry on top.

“punish me. please make me beg for my life.” i’m telling you now, i just know pat and pran are into some kinky shit (and good for them!!!!!). never getting over how pran likes when pat calls him “baby”. i didn’t know it then, but i truly needed this piece of knowledge.

the both of them wrestling and then pinning each other down against various surfaces in pat’s apartment...and then pran leaping on top of the KITCHEN COUNTER to pin pat down?????? pran should have been the one climbing between their balconies, clearly his agile enough omg.

they ended bad buddy in the most pat and pran way possible, and i couldn’t love it more than i already do :’))) it was so much more than i could have hoped for...this whole series was...and it’s basically been a whole week since it ended, but i still have this huge bad buddy shaped hole in my heart that no other drama will ever be able to fill.

i’ve only really felt this way about one other drama before (itsay), and i didn’t think i would ever feel as emotionally invested in a series in the same way ever again until bad buddy happened, so i’m just so incredibly grateful to p’aof, ohm, nanon, and the entire cast and crew of this drama. it was the one thing i looked forward to every single week, and it breaks my heart knowing that we won’t be able to follow along with pat and pran’s journey anymore, but knowing that they’re happy and thriving somewhere in their fictional universe kind of puts it back together again.

this is absolutely the best romance i’ve ever seen on screen before. everything about pat and pran’s love is just so beautiful and real to me. i’ve already talked about how much i adore these two and their relationship at length in my previous posts, and i genuinely mean every word. their relationship is just so special in its simplicity, yet it still found a way to surprise me every time. they’ve raised my standards for love, and if i can’t have what they have, then i don’t want it ;;; ohm and nanon’s portrayals and chemistry are the gold standard as far as i’m concerned. they were incredible in this. i knew they would be ever since they were announced as the main leads for this project, but they still knocked it out of the park. they exceeded every expectation i ever had. i’m so proud of them.

most of all, i just want to thank p’aof for giving us this drama. without him, this would have never happened. his vision is the reason that we got ohm and nanon as pat and pran in the first place, and i’m eternally grateful for that. i’ve always loved p’aof’s works, but this one is his masterpiece imo. the emotions i felt while watching this are unparalleled, and i don’t see that ever changing no matter how many times i rewatch this (and i know i’ll be rewatching it for years to come).

i actually never intended on writing any of these posts...like literally the only other dramas i’ve ever written these thoughts/recaps posts for were itsay and ipytm...and i never had any desire to do them again until bad buddy came into my life. i held off until ep 5, but after that i had no choice but to cave into the weight of all the feelings i had...and then each ep just kept making me feel more and more, and i had to keep going :’)

if you’ve read this whole post (and/or any of my other posts), thank you so much!! i know that they’re all pretty long-winded (it’s def hard for me to be succinct sometimes), but it always means a lot to me seeing people get as emotional about this show as i do. just knowing that we’re all in the same boat. idk when the next time i’ll be doing one of these again will be, but if we ever get a special ep/sequel/prequel/spin off to bad buddy of any kind, then i’ll more than likely be there!! i miss this show so much already.

#bad buddy #i was writing this and then saw that p'jennie uploaded her reaction to ep 12 featuring ohm and nanon!!!!!!!!!!#at least i still have something to fill the emptiness i've been feeling this whole week since bbs ended ;;;#it's still so hard to believe that it's over now...#this took me too long to write but mostly bc i didn't want to let it go yet :((( i want to talk about this show forever bc i love it so much #i think i'm gonna rewatch everything from start to finish on the weekend again bc i need to feel something again #text

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sebas-chan-butler · 3 years

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i'm SO glad you're watching bad buddy because it's a MASTERPIECE. ohm and nanon's acting is impeccable. this last episode?? it has so many good moments!!! the domestic part at the start, pran smiling bc he thinks pat is hella cute, pat laughing at pran's password XD, THE "no one has this scent of smell like you" JESUS FUCK, ink teasing pat about pran when she found them, pat's slow realization of "oh, i like him. i really do", pat being jealous of wai! but also never ever getting angry at pran or hurting him. all that fourth part was so INTENSE, the confrontation scene was so so so well-done, like even when pat was drunk he never intended to hurt pran. the only reason why he's being so serious and demanding is bc he's so desperate for pran to admit there's something, ANYTHING between them. he just needs pran to say it. he's broken and desperate and he couldn't care less about wai watching them, he just wants pran to say it. and then the fact that pran is all worried bc wai is there and pat just loses it bc "what? are you afraid he would find out? do you care about him that much?" im SCREAMING, everything was so so sooo well-done. AND THE KISS SCENE!!! it absolutely killed me, i'm still shaking. never recovering from this. i could write an entire essay on all the emotions and feelings i experienced while watching that scene, and about all the visceral feelings that you can FEEL pouring out of them, and the reactions and gestures and expressions during the kiss. but that would be too much. just. i was too overwhelmed in that scene. it's been a while since i felt like this. it's such a good work of art <3 ohmnanon are truly gems and as always p'aof's works are always masterpieces <3 2gether, dark blue kiss, he's coming to me, a tale of a thousand stars... every single one is amazing. i'm glad i'm watching this and that you are too <3 (btw if you haven't watched his other works such as the ones i mentioned i highly recommend them!!! every single one of them are otherwordly and worth of so much praise!! 2gether is fluffy and happy and soft, dbk is angsty but it has so many sweet, adorable moments and petekao/sunmork are going to melt you and stay with you forever, hctm is a tragic, unique, gentle and lovely masterpiece that will touch you deeply, and atots is incredibly well-written, it teaches so many life lessons and the chemistry is outstading and it's soft and it's angsty and emotional and visceral and heartbreaking but also breathtaking and it has one of the best written characters i've ever seen [tian my son my baby the love of my life is going to be forever in my heart, one of the best characters i've watched including all the shows i've ever watched], you're gonna love it from beginning to end. so really just watch every single one bc each one is strong in different aspects but they're all terribly good!!! <3 p'aof never fails!!).

sorry for the long and random ramble, i hope you're doing alright <3 have a nice weekend <3

.......GIRL DON'T DO THIS TO MEEE!!! I STILL HAVEN'T CALMED SINCE LAST NIGHT SKJDVNDFJKVBDJFVBJDFB!!!

Tbh, I noticed their good acting and chemistry since episode 2. They put a bl on next level. I don't know how to thank them. I would like them to know how grateful I am because they bring my hope about good bl back. Lately I couldn't find anything serious, good quality but T H E M???? Boys, you are freaking amazing!!!

"no one has this scent of smell like you" Hahahahah I love hiss smell kink XD I don't know how back then Pat wasn't aware of his feeling cuz you don't like the smell of you "friend" khm khm

Before kissing scene, I was so into their fight moment. When Pat said "come here", I'm sure it was for Pran, not for Wai. He was like " Please come back on my side, you should sing that song only with me, you don't belong next to him but next to me" sdjvbsdjkvbsdjkvbvjh MY FEELINGS!!! let's not forget how their acting there was amazing too!! I couldn't take away my look from Ohm face how good he was at portraying Pat's emotions.

I think one whole essay wouldn't be enough to describe how we feel about that kiss. I'll just tell you, I had to call my friend and talk about that kiss with her for whole 2 HOURS AHAHAHAHAH. But I was shaking and sweating so hard. How many bls I have watched and I think NO ONE GOT ME AS THIS ONE!! This is the best kiss E V E R!!! They showed not just to us, but to another actors how they should to their job😎 I always hated those cringe kisses where they just press their faces together and stand like that, not moving for whole 2 minutes 😒😒🙄🙄I appreciate everyone's job but come on. If you can't do it how you should do it then don't do a kiss scene. It can only bring down whole thing. THIS IS HOW YOU KISS AKNFSDJKVBSJVBJHS!! '2gether, dark blue kiss, he's coming to me, a tale of a thousand stars" I know all of them ahahahah and I have to be honest but BBS is the best for me among all them. They gave me feelings and that's important. 2gether was so funny but I have a lot to resent about them. DBK was not my cup of tea but I loved second couple in that show!!! Among them, the best is A tale of a thousand stars. It was smth refreshing from all school and uni plots, I loved every second of it.

If you didn't watch and I doubt cuz they are also one of the best things in BL, watch " I promise you the moon " and their second season too. Their emotions reminds me a lot on BBS. Those two shows really did a great with chemistry and looks and asjcbhjbs everything!!! Nah hahahaah, don't be sorry!!!! You can always come to me and scream about bl shows ahahha, I'm always open for conversations XD And not just you, but anyone. That's why we are here, to talk and be happy together about our boys 🥰🥰🥰

Now I can't wait next episode akjcjvbjhskhb!! Every day of waiting is pure torture!! Have in mind, this was just ep 5th!!! We still have a lot to see akjbcvajvbhsjvhjhdfjbhfgd I'M SOO EXCITED!!!

#screaming about bbs #bad buddy episode 5 #bad buddy #ask #they are amazing #my heart #I hope i don't have many typing mistakes #I'm lazy to read it all over again hahahah

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tobeornottotc · 3 years

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Listen Here

Still trying to process this episode! It was crazy but so great! Here is the new podcast episode where we break down and analyze every moment in this episode, from the mirroring with the past episode to this episode, to explaining why this episode was done so well in terms of structure, plot, and of course chemistry and depth. This episode had it all. I could talk and analyze this show all day, but I am still shell shocked by the last part of this episode. I am falling more and more in love with this show. So if you want to see what I would be writing as essays, you could listen to those thoughts on here. Let me know what you think, and I hope you enjoy. :) Okay see you later going back to fangirling about this show.

Thank you again @badprophetvx for joining me to speak about this show. <3 you very much

#bad buddy #bad buddy the series #patpran #ohmnanon #pat x pran #bl series #bl drama #thai bl #LIFE REWRITTEN

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chalkrevelations · 2 years

Text

There was a lot of Beltane over the weekend, but I actually have some time off this week, so here’s Bad Buddy Ep 4, Part 4, finally – in which Ink makes some things clear but apparently not clear enough; Pat does not know when to stop, ever; and Nanon Korapat’s ridiculously expressive FACE breaks my heart. Fair warning, this got long.

Due diligence, of course: There will be spoilers – including, possibly, for later episodes. If you haven’t finished watching the show and don’t want to be spoiled, drive through and come back later.

So, OPEN ON Pran, on the bleachers, prepping for the big Architecture vs. Engineering rugby game. Pat shows up in full trickster mode, comes over and plants his ass down two feet away, ready to start instigating some shenanigans. Pran is not down for shenanigans today, he’s kind of cranky, and he tells Pat, why don’t you just give us away sit down right next to me. Pat wants to know if Pran’s worried someone will see them together (which we ALL know the answer to, by now), tells him that he can just say they’re talking about the bus stop (A. you stole that idea from Ink, Pat, and B. how much is there to actually say about the bus stop?), and then asks if Pran’s afraid people will think Pat is flirting with him (WHICH YOU ARE, PAT). At this point, Pran aggressively ignores him, which is the worst thing you can do to Pat, so Pat retaliates by reaching over and stroking Pran’s hair. :hands: I don’t know if this was supposed to be ruffling his hair, but that is NOT what ended up happening. There’s some slapping on Pran’s part and continued poking on Pat’s part, until Pran hisses at Pat to stop playing around because people can see them, and Pran isn’t ready to be seen, yet. He’s just starting to get serious about retaliation when Ink shows up with her camera, snapping some pictures, and literally says “Look at you two!” NO, don’t look, Ink! Pran isn’t ready to be seen, yet! Ink says she missed the sweet moment, and can they do that again for her and her camera? Pran does NOT oblige her and tells Pat to get back on his own side, causing Pat to grab up his bag and huff off like he’s been mortally insulted. (Pat’s love language (receiving) is clearly time and attention, and he’s just been roundly rejected.) Ink makes some small talk at Pran about his shoulder, while Pran’s face does some complicated things as he assesses how much he actually wants to be talking to his apparent rival in his doomed love affair. But Ink tells him she has a victory gift for him if he wins, and he looks pleasantly surprised, then thoughtful as she walks away. Significantly, we hear her say, from out of the shot (presumably to Jam, who’s been trailing her), “Do you want to take pictures?” and Jam responds, “Never say no to cameras.” Always allow yourself to be seen (maybe significant that it was Pat, who’ll have less of a problem being open and with people knowing about the relationship, who was the one Ink and Jam pulled in front of Ink’s camera first, almost as soon as she met Pat and Pran again?), but also, always allow yourself to see – don’t turn away, don’t pretend you don’t see, don’t pretend that what you do see is something other than what it really is. Spoiler alert: Pran will NOT follow this advice, at least not yet, and we get an immediate example of this as, at this point, he looks over toward where Pat has ended up, and we cut to a shot of Pat that’s clearly from Pran’s POV, beyond Ink and Jam in the foreground. We see that Pat’s looking back at Pran with a hint of a smile, and he’s in crystal-clear focus – the only thing that IS, in this shot. All of his surroundings are soft and out-of-focus, but he’s so sharp and defined that if you pause here, it almost looks like they’ve got Ohm Pawat against a green screen. He holds Pran’s gaze, and one corner of his mouth quirks up into a smile. Cut back to Pran, who is … not happy about his own clarity of vision, nor what he’s just seen. This is not safe – what Pat is doing, what Pran is feeling - all of it is so far out of Pran’s comfort zone, and he tries to shake it off, literally shaking his head.

Now the two teams hit the field, led by Pran and Pat as they line up against each other. Their seconds, Wai and Korn, are just behind them, staring each other down, just like Pran is staring down Pat, who seems taken aback at being the object of Pran’s killing focus. I thought you wanted competitive Pran, Pat. Take a look, he’s ready to go. Anyway, we get a lot of running around with the ball now, which I’m not going to pretend to understand the rules of. Guys are passing the ball back and forth, spectators are cheering, Ink is taking pictures. Pat scores a goal. Korn tackles Pran. Pran tackles Pat. Pat tries to tackle Pran but is unsuccessful, and Pran scores a goal, and I rewind and watch again, trying to figure out if Pat was really trying or not. I’m still not sure, particularly given later developments. Pran takes the time to stare down Pat and give him a flippant little finger salute on his way back to the Architecture side of the field. Pran is - let’s just be honest here - being kind of an asshole, every single one of his porcupine spikes is out and quivering, and Pat’s a little baffled by it. Oh, honey. GET THERE FASTER. Next, Pran tries to tackle Pat, but Pat passes to Korn, who scores, leading Pat to turn around in Pran’s arms and grin at him, because when we cut back to Pat and Pran after Korn’s goal, Pran still has his arms around Pat’s waist and is snugged right up against him, his chest pressed against Pat’s back in a pose we’ll see again in a later ep, only lying down and with considerably less clothing. Sports, amirite? Pat is amused and warns Pran that if he holds Pat this tight, people might think they’re boyfriends. Pat, your Oblivious Faux-Straightboyness is KILLING ME. It’s also killing Pran, if you’re wondering why he seems to be out for your blood. Anyway, next, we see Chang – I think, that looks like his head of curls – tackle Pran, and Engineering takes the ball while Pran stays down on the ground for a minute. Pat comes trotting back to him and holds out a hand to help him up, which Pran aggressively ignores. I mean, I’m sure y’all know what I mean when I talk about someone aggressively ignoring someone else, but you’ve never seen anybody pull this off like Pran can pull it off. In response, Pat’s face kind of falls – as I’m sure Pran intended, you’re such a bitch, baby, I can only sit here and marvel at the level of you – as he watches Pran walk off. Pran’s babying his shoulder, and when Korn comes up to Pat, Pat tells him that he (Pat) will cover Pran, and to let the others know. Much like he was the only one who was supposed to fight Pran back in the day, when Arch and Eng were brawling every 30 minutes, I guess, although we’ve moved from Pat protecting Pran in order to keep Pa doing his laundry to Pat protecting Pran because … well, Pat’s not quite sure yet, just because. (FASTER WOULD BE BETTER, BRO.) And yeah, that’s not suspicious at all, Pat - you’re probably lucky Korn doesn’t appear to be the brightest bulb in the box, particularly as you apparently told him you like someone in Architecture. It’s probably only your ridiculous Faux-Straightboyness that’s giving you any kind of cover, at this point. ANYWAY, Pat has told Korn, loud and clear, that he’ll handle Pran, so of course the next thing we see is Korn come barreling out of nowhere the next time Pran has the ball to tackle him, kind of like he launched himself out of nowhere to punch Wai in the face during a brokered truce. Korn, you are such a TERRIBLE human being that I almost can’t do anything other than throw up my hands and laugh a little bit hysterically at this point. Although I do sort of have to give you this one, given that – as you point out when Pat wants to know what the fuck you were thinking - it’s a rugby game, and Pat (apparently) didn’t tackle the guy on the opposing team with the ball when he had the chance, which is not how you win rugby games. I assume, at least. I know jack-all about rugby, but if Korn’s correct about Pat’s inaction here, Pat’s strategy seems like a good way to lose.

So, Pran’s on the ground in obvious pain after Korn takes him down – this is why I don’t play contact sports, kids - as if Wai and the secondary backup Architecture hobbits need more of a reason to resent Korn, in particular. This is probably not going to be good for tenuous bus-stop-building relations, although again, contact sports, guys. Literally the definition of play stupid games, win stupid prizes. There’s no flag on the field, so I have to presume Korn hasn’t actually, technically, done anything wrong. Wai comes barreling over, proceeds to practically pat down Pran for injuries, helps him up, and gives a death glare to Pat over his shoulder, AS HE SHOULD at this point. Let’s take a look at what this all looks like from Wai’s POV: His best friend has been giving discomfited fuck-off vibes to Pat since before the game started, and Pat – well known for making trouble for Architecture students in general, including physical violence, never even mind his history of bullying Wai, personally - has continued to press constant, unwanted attention – one might almost say harassment – on Pran in spite of Pran’s very obvious protests, and now this bullshit from Korn right after Pat and Korn have conferred on the field. Frankly, Wai would be a bad friend if he wasn’t in defensive mode at this particular moment. I also have to wonder what kind of calculations might be starting to add up, even if subconsciously, in the back of his brain about what Pat might have wanted … possibly demanded … from Pran in return for Pat’s inexplicable decision to force Engineering to help build the bus stop in the face of nothing but bad blood between the two groups. Wai - who’s literally been put on his knees in front of Pat as Pat’s evening “entertainment” in the past - is working with imperfect information about the relationship between Pat and Pran, but given the info he has, all this looks … not great on Pat’s part. Potentially super-skeevy. Mmhm. I’m just gonna put that out there as one unspoken possibility for what might be driving Wai’s increasing over-protectiveness – particularly as whatever Wai thinks Pran might have agreed to behind the scenes, he would have been doing for and because of Wai - and let it simmer for a bit. We’ll set it right here and maybe get back to it at a later time. ANYWAY, unsurprisingly, Wai’s also got some murderous glare to spare for Korn as they pass him while Wai guides Pran back to the Architecture side of the field. Pat and Korn hiss at each other at this point (the girls are fiiiighting) about Pat’s missed chance to tackle Pran, and Korn wants to know what the hell has gotten into Pat. The 12-year-old boy part of my brain snickers that it’s not Pran YET, but just wait. It’s probably lucky for both Pat and Pran that Waikorn are still mortal enemies at this point, because if they managed to put their 1.75 brain cells together (to be clear, Wai has 1.5 of those brain cells, no, I am not accepting criticism), they’d have these two dead to rights. They’d certainly figure out what’s going on faster than Pat is figuring it out. When Korn presses him, Pat gets this lost look on his face like he realizes he legitimately has NO idea what’s gotten into him. He doesn’t know how to answer because he doesn’t know (yet). And so he avoids the question by just walking away, toward Pran and Wai. He calls out to get Pran’s attention, and Wai - who can see how miserable Pran is right now, on top of the physical injury (we can ALL see how miserable Pran is right now, thank you Nanon, and your gorgeously expressive FACE) - is ready to take out this fucker’s trachea, at this point. He steps between Pat and Pran – which, remember, is where he started this episode, in that faceoff over the bus stop in the opening of 4.1, when everyone was lined up on their own sides of the table, except Wai, who was framed between Pat and Pran – and he’s literally shielding Pran with his body, staring down Pat. He’s blocking Pat’s physical access to Pran in the same way Pran, himself, repeatedly uses his own body to try blocking Pat’s emotional access to him, blocking Pat at his door to try to prevent Pat from coming into his room/sanctuary. (We see this pattern in 4.1, when Pat barges his way in with the earphones, in 4.3 when he wheedles his way in with apology fried chicken and bruise remedy, and we’ll see it again at the end of this Part.) On the sidelines, Ink is looking concerned. Things are super tense. Pat tries a couple of times to look around Wai at Pran, but every time Pat moves, Wai counters, and he will NOT look away, even though Pat won’t meet his eyes, is just trying to look at Pran. Pran won’t look back at Pat, just stays where he is behind the bulwark of Wai. Pat finally shakes his head and turns away. I think Pran is … conflicted at this point. He looks a little regretful as Pat walks away, but he touches Wai’s shoulder back when Wai wordlessly checks in with him with a touch. GOD, my little Pran & Wai heart during this entire scene, y’all, I’m dying. Anyway, Pran does look back at Pat for a brief moment here, and then Safe pats him on the back, and he gets enveloped by his posse again.

Cut to after the game, Pran’s on the bleachers, saying goodbye as everyone leaves. Apparently, he got benched after that tackle and exacerbation of his shoulder injury, because Ink comes up and tells him that if he’d played the whole time, Architecture would have won. She hands him a bottle of water that is clearly not product placement because she hands it to him like a normal human being and he takes a drink out of it like a normal human being. His face is saying that he’s a little unsure and uncomfortable about why they’re talking. I have to wonder how much he’s ever actually seen her as a friend, even outside of the issue he has with her as a rival for Pat’s attention and maybe some resentment that Ink is someone Pat would be romantically interested in when he’d clearly never want Pran that way. Ink, however, has made Pran a bracelet, just like the one she made Pat, with a “P” charm and everything. Y’all. She made them matching bracelets. My Queer Goddess, I’m telling you. She just needs to let everybody else borrow some of her gaydar. Anyway, she tells Pran she wanted to give him the bracelet back in the day, in 10th grade, but he moved away, and she puts it on him, and he’s starting to loosen up around her, realizing that maybe this means Pat’s bracelet wasn’t some super-special courting gift. Ink ask him if he likes the bracelet, and he looks contemplative, and a little unhappy, and when she presses him about what’s going on, you can see him steeling himself for disappointment before he asks if she likes Pat. Well, no, actually, Pran, that is the WRONG JINDAPAT, so you can tuck away that horribly vulnerable look on your face, you are safe from Ink, although you remain in grave danger from Pat’s embarrassing Oblivious Faux-Straightboyness. Ink is still holding her Pa cards close to the vest, but she practically laughs at the idea that she’s interested in Pat and reassures Pran that Pat’s a friend, just like Pran is. She wants to know why he’s asking and if he wants to hit on her, and Pran’s FACE, y’all. He’s so obviously trying to figure out how to tell her that he couldn’t be attracted to a girl if he tried, without being insulting. Ink tsks at him for making her feel unattractive – stop jamming the signals, Ink, the baby gays are already having enough trouble figuring out their own and everybody else’s shit. At any rate, Pran is so relieved, and he’s eased up a ton, and they’re laughing together now, and then we cut to Pat at the end of the bleachers, watching them, likely coming to some Wrong Conclusions, and his brain running madly on its little hamster wheel doesn’t even know how to feel. Do you even know which one you’re jealous of, Pat? GET THERE FASTER.

Cut to night at the dorm. Open on Pran’s smiley face poster on the inside of his door as we hear some knocks, and NO, I don’t care what kind of reminders you’re giving me about the proper face to present, fuck you, Mr. Smiley Face. I know what’s going to happen in the upcoming scene, and I’m NOT going to be happy about it. I mean, I’m going to wallow in the delicious delicious pain and angst of it all, but I’m not going to be happy. Pran checks the peephole and still deigns to open the door to Pat, who holds out a bag of medicinal stuff that they bicker about whether or not Pran’s going to accept. Pran’s already looking a little puffy around the eyes, and I have to wonder if he’s already been crying. It’s OK, baby, you’ve had a big day, but I hate to tell you, it’s about to get immeasurably worse. Pat keeps insisting that Pran take the medicines no matter how many times Pran refuses, and I’m getting the feeling this is about more than some drugstore remedies, Pat. (Psst. While you’re trying to make up for Korn being an ass, how about you take Wai a gift bag? It might help you out a lot.) Pran insists he’s fine. (You are NOT fine, my dude.) Pat attempts to broker a deal: In return for the medicines, Pran can let him spend the night. Um. Pat. Take these things you don’t want to take from me and also let me have a slumber party here at your house? What part of this deal is supposed to appeal to a guy who currently won’t even let you all the way inside his door? Pran, predictably, laughs at this suggestion. Pat rummages around for an excuse for this and comes up with “I forgot my keys” AGAIN. Again, Pat? After some more bickering, Pat gets unceremoniously kicked out and the door shut in his face. He stands there a minute, looking back and forth between his door and Pran’s, once again looking like a golden retriever that got flicked in the nose. He’s really committing to the bit this time, though, because later, when Pran checks the peephole again, we get a fisheye view of Pat sitting in the hallway outside his door, still with his duffle bag, still in his rugby getup. Pran gets his thinky face on – how much does he trust this sadsack schmuck? Spoiler alert: MORE THAN HE SHOULD – before he heaves a sigh. Fine. He’ll be the bigger person. He opens the door. Invites Pat into his room (/sanctuary/inner sanctum/heart), like Pat isn’t getting ready to go serial killer on his emotions. Oh. Oh, baby. Pat looks up like he can’t fully process what’s going on, but when Pran starts counting down, he scrambles for his stuff and scurries inside as Just Friend starts playing in the background. Pran, completely unaware of the shellacking he’s getting ready to take, represses a grin as he closes the door.

Inside Pran’s bedroom, we see him arranging a bedroll for Pat beside his bed. Oh. Wow. There’s a lighted happy face sitting on one of the bedside nightstands that matches the frowny face above his computer out in the main room. It’s like peeling the layers of an onion. The onion of PRAN’S HEART. This smiley face is going to be sitting just above Pat’s head, once he lays down on the bedroll. Oh, Pran. You’re like a little woodland forest creature – a spikey, bitchy little woodland forest creature – getting ready to be bulldozed by Pat’s Oblivious Faux-Straightboyness. Anyway, on one wall is hanging Pran’s red Architecture jacket and one of his bags. Remember that. Pat comes wandering into frame wearing only shorts and wants to know if he can sleep topless. Pran, who’s muffled in a big T-shirt and sweatpants, is all, NO. lol. Pran throws him a nearby T-shirt – the infamous “Friend/Unfriend” T-shirt - with the warning that he hasn’t washed it. Pat sniffs it, because of course he does, and says it smells good, because of course he does, and omg. Bro. FASTER WOULD BE BETTER. Pran’s face says, “what did I do to deserve this misery?” You opened the door, lit. and fig., that’s what you did, my dude. Pat promises to wash the shirt, but Pran says never mind, he was going to throw it away, so Pat now gets to keep it and take it home and indulge in rubbing his face in it whenever he wants. Pran just wants to go to sleep, but Pat doesn’t have Nong Nao, so he doesn’t have anything to hug and cuddle and to help keep him warm. Pat. Stoppit. You are absolutely shameless. He turns his big pleading eyes on Pran, who finally gives in and moves closer to the edge of his bed so that a corner of the comforter will drape down for Pat. Pat sniffs the comforter because of course he does. Pat, I DID NOT consent to be part of this whole kinky experience you’re having right now. Pran’s deathglare matches my own. Pat calls him “Sir,” and promises to quit playing, and his wording catapults me back to the miserable childhood these two had, with the lost chances to play together and sleep over at each other’s houses and be normal children. Because I needed something else to be sad about, in this scene.

Later, both of them are still awkwardly lying awake. Pat wants to know if Pran’s sleeping (“Yes”), if his shoulder still hurts (“No”), and oh, by the way, Ink gave you a bracelet? (“Yes, JUST LIKE YOURS, (so don’t think yours is special.)”) They lie there for a minute, and we can see Pran visibly steel himself, like he did before he asked Ink if she liked Pat. Oh, my brave little toaster. I can’t deal with this, knowing how comparatively vulnerable you’re getting ready to make yourself, and the way you’re going to get wrecked for it. If I didn’t want to catch every complex microexpression playing across Nanon’s face, I’d be watching through my fingers. Pran asks if he can ask Pat something. Pat also has a question for Pran. THANK GOD, now Pran can delay his own emotional sharing – you go first, Pat. Pat pauses for a minute. They both seem hesitant to possibly break open this new thing that’s growing between them – whatever it is - hesitant to disturb it or let it out into the light, to let it be seen, somehow. The intimacy of this scene is gorgeous, the framing of the shots close on both their faces, and the way the lighting halos each of them against the darker corners of the room around them, and this intangible thing that Ohm and Nanon build between them. Pat finally asks if Pran likes Ink. Oh, Pat. I could cry. So could Pran – I think Nanon’s nose is already getting a little bit red from repressed tears. Pran pauses a minute, probably to collect himself, then looks over at Pat and asks if he likes Ink. Pat says, he asked first. We can see the slow creep of misery bleeding over Pran’s features. CAN WE NOT, GUYS? My heart can’t take this. Pat suggests they both answer at the same time, and Pran doesn’t actually respond, like he can hold this knowledge back, freeze things right here and keep his heart from being crushed for a few moments longer. Pat counts down. Pran says “no” as Pat says “yes.” Pat is super-relieved, y’all! Now they won’t be competing against each other for the same girl! Pran is starting the slow process of DYING INSIDE. This motherfucker has come back again and again, working his stupid little annoying tendrils into the crevices in the stone around Pran’s heart, breaking it down bit by bit to root himself in there, and now he’s going to stab Pran in the softest and most vulnerable bits that have been exposed when Pran just opened the door and invited him in. Pat. Bro.

Nanon’s eyes are starting to get glossy, and I’m done. This is as bad as when A-Xiang cries on Word of Honor. “Did you tell her your feelings?” Pran asks Pat, around the blood in his teeth. Pat hasn’t, yet, but does Pran think she likes him at all? And … I don’t know quite how to feel about Pran’s answer, which is to scoff and ask how he (Pran) could know that? Because we quite literally just watched Pran ask her if she likes Pat and saw her respond that he’s just a friend. Why does Pran not tell him this? He doesn’t weaponize it and use it to make Pat bleed the way Pat’s just done to him. He doesn’t give it to him as a heads-up warning. Does he want Pat to get shot down by Ink, herself? Does he figure it’s not his place to reveal something that Ink told him just between them, particularly given the way he hides his own relationship with Pat from everyone? Does it not matter to him, given that Pat likes Ink – not Pran - in the first place? And then Pat sits up, leans on the edge of the bed, close to Pran and asks him, “If you were her, would you like me?” BRO. YOU ARE KILLING BOTH ME AND PRAN. Pran - who’s not even being allowed the dignity of being unseen while he tries to choke down all this misery, because now Pat’s right in his face - asks Pat what there is to like about him. And the following litany … maybe Pat’s surface intention is just to show what a good guy he is, and why wouldn’t Ink like a good guy? (Oh, Pat.) But Pat opens his big mouth and reels off an entire list of why Pran would like him, a list of all the things that made Pran fall in love with him and then fall in love with him all over again: Drumming in his band, saving him from Engineering, OK maybe not the dumpling incident (Pran scoffs again at this point, and it is clearly an attempt to hide a sob). Helping him get the sponsorship for the bus stop. Keeping his guitar safe. Nanon’s FACE at this point is exquisite. Exquisitely painful. Every incident Pat mentions is like another twist of the knife this asshole has already stabbed him with. Yeah, he would like you, Pat. He does like you, and you are currently making that the most agonizing experience he could possibly imagine. Flashback – clearly Pran’s memories, because this show isn’t done piling on the pain and angst – to Pat and Pran performing together in the high-school band, Pat making a guitar pick for Pran out of his own student ID, Pat taking over the bus-stop presentation when Pran was buffering, Pat playing Pran’s girlfriend at the bus stop, Pat giving Pran back the guitar that he’s kept safe all this time – all the things that Pat has done, all the little acts of service that are his love language that would normally lead to Pran’s joyful italicized OH moment in a rom-com - but Pran had that moment a long time ago, and he ended up suffering for it, and now he’s been goddam dumb enough to set himself up to be hurt again and all those little moments only add up to misery. Cut back to Pran’s face in present day, and Pat leans in - with that stupid glowing smiley face over his shoulder, right beside his own stupid sunshine face - and he says Pran’s name, and so softly and openly that I could scream, he asks “Would you like me?”

“I hate you,” Pran tells him, and rolls over to put his back to him.

Pat literally recoils a tiny bit at Pran’s words – there’s a beautiful subtlety to Ohm’s physical acting there – before he collects himself and decides that he’s SUPER-offended, because hey, he’s got a LOT of good qualities. Protip, bro: Your embarrassing Oblivious Faux-Straightboyness, which has just carved out your boyfriend’s heart, is NOT one of those good qualities. Pat continues to grumble to himself, including the parting shot – which he has NO idea is as devastating as it is - that they’ll see if Pran can find someone half as good as Pat. OH MY GOD, PAT. SHUT UP. STOP DIGGING. OR THAT HOLE YOU’RE MAKING DEEPER AND DEEPER IS GOING TO BE YOUR GRAVE. As Pat lies down, Pran looks back over his shoulder toward him with this horribly longing look, then whips his head back the other way like he’s forcing himself not to look. But he just can’t help himself – he looks back again, watches Pat while Pat’s got his eyes closed, gives this heartwrenching, painful smile before even he is tired of his miserable self and starts wiping away his tears and trying to compose himself. He finally yanks the comforter away from Pat and burritos himself up in it as he rolls to put his back to Pat again, and scene. Cut to the bleakest of black, and I am left emotionally wrung out, thank you Nanon Korapat and your FACE and your TEARS and your little LIP WOBBLE.

Next time, on EPISODE 5: Pat confesses to Ink, Ink rightfully scoffs in his direction, and Pat FINALLY GETS THERE.

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Turtles Catches Up with Old GMMTV: SOTUS Edition

[What’s going on here? After joining Tumblr and discovering Thai BLs through KinnPorsche in 2022, I began watching GMMTV’s new offerings -- and realized that I had a lot of history to catch up on, to appreciate the more recent works that I was delving into. From tropes to BL frameworks, what we’re watching now hails from somewhere, and I’m learning about Thai BL's history through what I’m calling the Old GMMTV Challenge (OGMMTVC). Starting with recommendations from @absolutebl on their post regarding how GMMTV is correcting for its mistakes with its shows today, I’ve made an expansive list to get me through a condensed history of essential/classic/significant Thai BLs produced by GMMTV and many other BL studios. My watchlist, pasted below, lists what I’ve watched and what’s upcoming, along with the reviews I’ve written so far. First official Old GMMTV Challenge review up: SOTUS.]

[NOTE, March 23, 2024: I want to note, from the future!, that my thoughts on Krist Perawat, his acting, and his career trajectory regarding his personal controversies, have changed quite a bit since the publication of this 2023 post. There is excellent commentary out there about the detrimental impact of fandom behavior on Krist and his reputation over the years that I’ve been influenced by, and his comeback to BL in Be My Favorite was a risk that I supported. I have a lot of nostalgia for SOTUS and SOTUS S now, and their impact on the Thai BL genre since their airings.]

I spent a lot of the weekend wrapping my head around the MANY thoughts I have about SOTUS -- but first, I want to say that the FEEDBACK I received on questions that I posted throughout my watch of the show really heartened me. THANK YOU, THANK YOU (!!!) to EVERYONE who made helpful comments on my posts (here, here, here, here, especially here, and here). All of you helping to set me up for how I understand the historical timeline of the development of BLs in Thailand was absolutely necessary for the lenses in which I ultimately watched the show.

And I think there’s a number of perspectives I ended up adopting over the course of my watch. It might help me to write this piece if I list out those lenses now:

- Lens #1: WHY, OH MY GOD, WHY WAS KRIST CAST IN THIS ROLE - Lens #2: People had to have enjoyed this in 2016 because there was nothing else like it available at the time, despite Krust - Lens #3: Maybe the first two points are related - Lens #4: Singto is reaching remarkable-level here - Lens #5: Maybe all of these points will help me understand why many fans still think of this show fondly, despite the subsequent Krust/KrustSingto drama and possibly questionable points made on sexuality and sexual preferences.

More than anything else, I think it helped me to watch this show while recognizing that I’m an #old. Being early middle-aged (early, I tell ya) helps me, literally everyday, to remember that history guides me to understand the world in which I view it now. So to watch a show from 2016, which is long-ago or not-that-long-ago, depending on your frame of reference, means that I was watching history. And history is.... a reflection of that one, singular moment in time, with the context of past events, people, and places influencing that moment in time.

I went out of order on the Old GMMTV Challenge because I was too eagerly curious about Singto to watch Love Sick first, and wait on SOTUS (as I’m planning to reward myself after this journey with a big old watch party of He’s Coming to Me, running back to my snuggly Ohm/Nanon rabbithole).

But as well, speaking of Bad Buddy: I also felt like I really wanted to get SOTUS under my belt after a number of separate and FABULOUS conversations about how Bad Buddy had purposefully relied on a BL framework (citing @miscellar), and how Aof and his team, plus Nanon and Ohm themselves, had set out essentially to create a critical meta-BL, complete with embedded reflection on BL tropes -- exactly the sorts of tropes that were borne out of SOTUS. (Here and here are two links to said fabulous conversations.)

I probably think about Bad Buddy at least once a day by way of how deeply layered it was a drama, so: to SOTUS I needed to go, to understand the tropes framework that @miscellar and others opined on, and for me to undergo a learning experience about how exactly today’s BLs are influenced by the ones that started the genre in Thailand.

Considering the lenses I listed above, I’ll say this: at the age I was at in 2016, and knowing that, as an Asian, I’ve always had a craving for shows by Asians, set in Asia, within Asian family and social systems, about issues of acceptance and equity felt by Asians: I predict that, save for Krust’s performance, I would have been CRAZY for SOTUS as a new kind of show that I wanted and needed to watch.

During my excellent conversations with the Tumblr family, I came to understand that SOTUS was Thailand’s first true BL. It centered on a same-sex attraction-to-relationship, established various levels of perspectives and commentaries on power dynamics, and set up a number of important tropes -- pink milk, university settings, engineering-as-gay, the gay-for-you motif, side couples and best friends, etc. -- that we then saw and see repeated in subsequent BLs.

Where I was at in 2016 -- I would have eaten it almost all of it up.

Now? Now, I get to see all the problematic factors about it, through the lens of history.

So I want to be fair about the commentary this show receives NOW, because one thing I heard repeated in the feedback I received over the past couple weeks, in part, was about nostalgia. Reflecting particularly on Singto’s performance as Kongpob -- I mean, with a slightly more sophisticated, mature, well-rounded, better-written script, his performance would have been totally groundbreaking.

But I THINK, both from a 2016-lens and from a now-lens, that the script was terribly choppy. I don’t think the script did justice for the risks this show was otherwise willing to take. And I think, again, that’s because SOTUS is a product of its time, where there were no precedents for how to otherwise tell Kong’s story -- and that SOTUS was breaking the ground that the current crop of GMMTV’s screenwriters and directors are now tending. In essence: GMMTV was experimenting with HOW to tell the CENTERED story of a same-sex relationship, and we saw that unfold in SOTUS’s real time.

Besides the choppy script, this show ultimately did not achieve creative groundbreaking status, for me, because of Krist. Not to be hyperbolic, but he’s one of the worst actors I’ve seen in an Asian drama, and I’ve watched some bad KBS daytime shit. If someone tells me that Krust has been great in certain cishet shows, that’s fine, but I’m not running to them (and now I’m SO disappointed about The Jungle, which I was otherwise looking forward to this year). And this feeling is not at all inclusive of his actual problematic homophobic behavior. He was just terrible in SOTUS.

We know and have seen tsundere leads. We all love our biases who have played tsundere leads. The problem with Krust is that he had zero reactivity and chemistry to an excellent Singto, regardless of the script, regardless of his acting methodology, if he had any to begin with.

So I have to think: did GMMTV cast him because, maybe, he was having trouble getting other projects that would have required, say, acting? And GMMTV was like, well, this guy’s under contract, let’s throw him a bone with this experimental show we’re doing, and see how it goes?

I am tending to think that that’s possibly what happened. And maybe, even, GMMTV could not have predicted how FANTASTIC Singto would be -- and, therefore, how wide the divide would have been between their performances. And, how much GMMTV was risking by putting this mismatched pair together for what ultimately was groundbreaking material.

GMMTV couldn’t have predicted the future, right? Hollywood tries with its predictive models, but this was new ground for this company.

Where the choppy script and Krust’s terrible acting really fails the show is, as I mentioned earlier, the issue that I bring up about power dynamics. Krust as Arthit was going to do something in this show that was rare at that moment: Arthit was going to move from a socially majority position to a minority position by falling in love with Kongpob.

That’s a big deal. That happens in two of my most dearest BLs, Old Fashion Cupcake and Cherry Magic, and many others, of course. The Asian collectivist perspective plays huge parts in both shows, unconsciously, that lead to the uke leads considering taking up with their semes. And it happens to Arthit, too. In the Asian collectivist perspective -- you, as a uke, respond empathically, and maybe even try to meet your seme where your seme is at.

I think the only times that I saw Krust at least trying to show up in this show was by way of this power dynamic move, to attempt to respond to Kong/Singto emotionally. There was a little eye contact. There was a little instinctual responsiveness. But otherwise, there was really a lot of dead air and dead space, leveraged by an only-okay soundtrack that left Krust and Singto struggling to act in essential silence, with Krust barely scraping by on attempting to communicate his struggle in his developing attraction to Kong.

I’m just wondering to myself: how much do I blame the actual show itself -- like the script, the director, the writers, etc. -- about how it ended up this way? I think I ultimately have a sympathetic heart about it, again, because of the history, and my betting (based on everything that everyone here on Tumblr has taught me about) that again, this was a kind of experiment for GMMTV, without the company knowing how HUGE KrustSingto would become.

Other points about the show that I want to quickly capture before I wrap up on Kong/Singto:

- The hazing, while concerning, didn’t make me swerve, as it was clear from the start that it was sanctioned by their school. I want to say that this kind of hazing is important to many Asian school social systems, but I know things have changed a ton since I was a kid. As with almost all social and family systems, the hazing, I think, offered another commentary on power dynamics that I think was reflected throughout the show. I thought the hazing was actually an interesting mirror to what Kong and Arthit were struggling with individually, between themselves.

- I LOVED THE SIDE CHARACTERS. M, Wad, Prae, May. They were fun, well-written, and WELL-ACTED.

I want to wrap this up with a reflection on Singto/Kong and his acting vis à vis the script.

Going back to the 2016 moment-in-time frame: I know I would have gone crazy for him seven years ago. Forget about it. Mans totally rose to the occasion of what this show was doing. I think the script ultimately failed to truly capture what he was willing to throw. (And that leads me to not being surprised that he was then subsequently paired with various leads in future shows, probably to try to capture a magic that he clearly demonstrated in SOTUS.)

In particular: I did NOT think the script did Kong justice by keeping the revelation about his budding attraction to Arthit until episode 11 (I *think* it was episode 11, but I could be wrong, and I’m not going back to fact-check, ha). I want to think that that’s one of the (many) kinds of mistakes that GMMTV is correcting for now. The comments about wives, the insistent “you like me”s -- they were non-contextual for much of the show, ESPECIALLY BECAUSE Krust could not catch a damn ball. That’s what ultimately broke me about this show. And I think that demonstrated a lack of fluency about how GMMTV could write scripts on same-sex attraction.

As well, as I wrote in this post -- the post-Arthit-coming-out discussion between Kong and M threw me. M asks Kong -- “do you like men?”

And Kong had SUCH a specific answer. To me, as I wrote previously: his answer was, I definitely don’t like men. I’m definitely not gay. I just like Arthit.

My guess is, for Thailand’s first full-fledged BL in 2016 -- this dialogue HAD to be written this way. To enter into the kind of territory we see NOW, as we saw in Moonlight Chicken -- where we see one man’s (Jim’s) struggle with IDENTIFYING himself as gay, AND presenting another man AS HIS boyfriend -- we had to START somewhere. That somewhere was SOTUS, in almost total opposite territory, where the concept of the admission-of-gay could not be contemplated.

@bengiyo’s comments in the last post I linked above, in particular, collide in part with @absolutebl‘s analysis on the Asian collectivist vision. However, I can’t help but compare this issue, again, to what we recently saw in Moonlight Chicken...where conversations about Jim, about Li Ming, and with Wen, a fully out and identified queer man, all touched upon individual identity.

That’s where we are -- that’s where we CAN be -- now, in 2023, and in the near future. SOTUS was important for me to watch to understand how we ended up here, now, for what was okay and was not okay, in 2016.

It’s okay, now, to appreciate collectivism WHILE ALSO identifying oneself as queer/gay. At least, it’s okay in fantasy BL-land. (Again, I’d peep @bengiyo’s comments about how that may not be reflective of what domestic Thai queer audiences may be feeling about these shows.)

I have a lot more understanding to undertake regarding how Asian queer audiences see this. But at least from the perspective of this first-generation Asian American -- to see the progression of history as the doors slowly open, from dramas to Asian (and other) audiences regarding how one can identify oneself, safely and happily -- that’s a big deal, and I see how SOTUS was a harbinger of things to come.

Singto was simply up to the task to break ground in this show, and it’s such a shame that he was let down, in my opinion, by his co-star. The subsequent history of that pairing breaks my heart, because I think it taints a lot of what SOTUS ended up bringing to the table. I’m glad we have Aof and Bad Buddy, now, to serve in part as a reflection for what SOTUS did, and how BLs and BL tropes could age, be manipulated, and be IMPROVED and developed upon, over the course of time. But the actual history of KrustSingto messes me up a lot in regards to how I might feel nostalgic, myself, for SOTUS, as I learn more about classic BLs.

It’s a confusing mindspace to be in, to move backwards in time to understand how things have developed -- but I gain such a bigger appreciation for the shows I’ve fallen in love with now, over these recent months, for where they came from.

[I want to give HUGE thanks to @absolutebl, @bengiyo, @nieves-de-sugui, @respectthepetty, @miscellar (especially for all the BBS context), @lurkingshan, @wen-kexing-apologist, @shortpplfedup, @clairificusrex, @dribs-and-drabbles, and everyone else who made comments in my SOTUS watch posts. All of you are my historians. More than the fun of writing these reviews is interacting and conversing with the Tumblr fam.]

(Love Sick is on deck. If anyone is following this journey, I’ll be fast-forwarding through the second season, ha -- I can’t commit to 36 lakorn-length episodes. I also have a HUGE and lengthy wedding trip coming up in a couple weeks. So the conclusion of this project will be delayed, but definitely know that I’ll be posting thoughts here and there as I plod through.)

#sotus #sotus the series #sotus meta #sotus the series meta #krist perawat #singto prachaya #kristsingto #turtles catches up with old gmmtv #the old gmmtv challenge

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