mark ur calendars today was the day i forgave maiev shadowsong

This is the last post I will make about Lily Orchard on this blog. If she keeps pushing my buttons or if I keep receiving interesting asks on the subject, I will just make a sideblog for the purposes of unleashing hell. I am not the kind of person who sits tight while the others are punching me. I fucking fight back, especially when I know I'm right.

I'm gonna put it all under the cut because none of my followers should continue to be exposed to this crap. Y'all don't deserve the psychic damage.

Not bringing up issues until well after the fact.

"I don't remember unfollowing you, but now that you called my attention to it, I'm not gonna do anything about it and I won't follow you back because reasons."

We all know tumblr is buggy as all heck, but if someone I followed asked me why I stopped following them and I had no clue, I would follow them back. I mean... Wouldn't that be the most logical course of action?

It happened to me before. After cleaning up my following list of a few inactive blogs, I noticed I was no longer following a friend of mine. I assumed I must've accidentally unfollowed them during the cleanup so I just followed them back again. Simple as that.

But no... Lily is special. Logic doesn't apply to her. Lily had no issues to talk about and didn't have any memory of intentionally unfollowing me and yet, she never followed me back.

My verdict? BULLSHIT.

And then, a couple of weeks later, this happened.

I sinned. I dared to disagree politely with Lily Orchard by presenting arguments to support my point of view and we can't have that in this house!

Can you imagine the disaster it would be if suddenly her followers noticed that it was allowed to disagree with Lily? The scandal! There would be an uprising!

So what did she do? She hid my replies from her post. As if... Somehow that would erase the whole conversation?? Because we can't have this kind of discourse on her blog, oh no. No, let's just fucking hide all the evidence, sweep everything under the rug, no one can ever know!

BUT WAIT, there's more.

Maybe I was reaching. Maybe I was imagining things. But the timing was amazing, don't you agree? Sometimes life is just full of coincidences...

So obviously, because I had once asked Lily for us to always be honest with each other, I poked her on discord to talk about it.

When I brought up the issue the same day it happened and specifically asked her if there was something wrong, what did she do?

This Anduin topic is something that clearly bothers her and was clearly bothering her back then.

But of course, I am the one who doesn't bring up the issues until well after the fact. So well after the fact that she never fucking brought it up until after she blocked me. And if I hadn't asked Mikaila, I wouldn't even know what the issue was!

And, while we're at it, am I the only one who thinks it's ironic that Lily keeps complaining about not having enough interaction on her blog but then hides the replies when people interact with her?

Oh wait, I forgot. She only wants interaction when people are worshipping her and drinking her every word like they're dying of thirst in a desert and she's the only one offering a sip of truth water.

How many times did you see me comment on that Anduin plot arc in your fic? Truthfully, how many? I probably said something once or twice when it came up, and then never again. Even though you posted an uncomfortable amount of excerpts regarding that topic.

I'm sure there are records of it somewhere on the internet but I'm too tired to go look it up now. I couldn't even read those excerpts because I felt disgusted. But I didn't bring that issue up because, unlike you, I have common sense. I understand that it's your fucking fic and you can write whatever you want. I didn't think it was my place to question because I actually have a functional brain and I can separate fiction from reality.

I don't have an obsession with Anduin. With Sylvanas, sure. And I proudly admit to that!

What I also proudly admit to is having an obsession with the truth. And you no longer know what that word even means.

It's almost as if you're having difficulty keeping track of what actually happened and what you decided happened. You've thrown out so many lies that it's clear you're no longer able to keep track of them yourself.

Or maybe you can and you're just another toxic piece of shit floating around the interwebs.

Either way, it's unhealthy and you need help.

And, by the way, what you call "harassing your wife" was me giving you a chance to tell me why you two were lying before I made a post about it, and offering my support to her in spite of that. Like I have always done.

Out of respect for her and for the other people that were mentioned in that conversation I won't post the screenshots here. But I stand by everything I wrote to her today.

My entire friend group have uninstalled WoW and started FF14

It still feels surreal we are doing this. Now, it is perfectly possible that we will be back to WoW within the month, talking about how disappointing the “weeb game” was, but, this stills feels like a seminal moment.

I have been a Warcraft fan since I was a literal kid trying (and failing :P) to play Tides of Darkness on my aunt’s desktop. I spent so many hours and so much of my allowance playing Reign of Chaos in internet cafes. 

When WOTLK trailer dropped, we had hijacked the computer lab and projected it to the auditorium for all to see. 

I have been part of real life, unironic Horde vs Alliance infighting in college gaming clubs. I remember us all wearing Horde/Alliance merch, enthusiastically and rather foolishly, but completely seriously, arguing about lore, about who did what wrong and who was “more at fault”.

I own, almost every single Warcraft book, comic, guide ever published. I own hard copies, I own digital copies. I have watched and read and listened to every single piece of lore ever produced about this setting.

I have kept my sub up and played through all of the content draught, the infamous SoO, the practically less than 2 patch worth expac that was WoD.

I have allowed my sub to lapse for the first time during BFA. 

I was so hyped for Shadowlands back when it was announced, and was annoyed when they changed the release date, causing me to waste my vacation time that I had taken for it. But a mere month of the expac in and I was already bored of it. And now, 9.1 is out and I am done. I barely played this patch and I have not only cancelled my sub, but went and removed the game from my PC.

Maybe this is a stupid overreaction and in the next patch, at the worst the next expac, I will be right back at the fur shop like the old fox I am. However, I know it feels different.

Throughout the years, I had many a thing that frustrated me about this game. Made me rage even. But I hadn’t quit then. No. The feeling that has been creeping up on me, isn’t rage. It is disinterest. I just, don’t care anymore. 

Most of my friends over the years have switched to the Horde and this has been a sore spot for me. I stuck with Alliance, having some alts to play with them, and they had some Alliance alts to play with me, but... It wasn’t the same, it wasn’t enough. Several online friends, I had already lost contact with.

And now we are all gathering in FF14! I had the discord chat of my life! So many people I hadn’t talked to in years, on top of my actual real life friends whom I hang out with, are all jumping into this new journey.

My best friend’s progression guild is looking to make a full guild transfer, currently all of them except one have characters and a guild in FF, trying to convince the last guy to make the switch.

And then there is the lore. That’s why I fell in love with this setting in the first place. I loved this story, the cheese, the heroism, the over the topness, all of it. It was never “high art”, but it was unique in its own way, it had heart and it had characters and stories that I got invested in. Deeply so. I hadn’t start playing WoW because I was a connoisseur of MMORPG genre and “calculated it to be the best among its contemporaries”. I dived head first in Vanilla because it was Warcraft.

And now, I honestly cannot bring myself to care about this story, or its characters, other than a passing resentment. This was not the case, less than a year ago. I had bought the bloody Shadows Rising novel, I had read it and I liked it.

Now I am just, over it. This sense was rising, this sense of feeling less and less care for it, as expac after expac went in wildly nonsensical directions. But I had things that I had liked well enough to keep at it and have hope, hope for a good enough story that would keep me engaged. But I lost it. Something broke in 9.1.

I guess I realized, or rather I perceive, that the actual writers of this story do not care about it and none of it matters. There is no story. There is no plot, no continuity. Just an endless stream of “cool” shots in cinematics that ultimately don’t matter because, it has no basis and it has no relevance. It exists because someone wanted to make this cool scene, without caring what came before it, or what will come after it. Each scene exist, not to progress a cohesive story, but simply because someone wanted it to exist. And the next “cool” piece will flagrantly retcon the last one, ignoring or outright invalidating the stakes and hooks that had been set up in the previous one. 

This is no longer a story of people, who were dramatic and weird and fantastical, but ultimately people. No. This is now a check list of what someone wanted to do in WoW setting and all the characters are empty puppets and all the plots matter only as much as they matter in any given single cinematic or questline. There is no pay off, and there is no logic. Characters aren’t allowed to live and react. Things only happen because the author said so, and the characters just bend and transform to do their bidding. And they feel no reason to explain nor establish as to why a character acts the way they do, let alone trying to make it believable or internally justified.

The gameplay aspect is the least important to me, the exact opposite of the majority. But I am sick and tired being punished with powerlessness for what I like story wise or aesthetically. I am sick and tired needing to read through guides upon guides, copying meta builds, just to have my class be remotely playable.

And most importantly, I am sick and tired of a game that will put me through genocide, deny me justice and vengeance under the guise of need for cooperation and then deny me playing with my friends across factions.

Now I get to play with all of my friends without jumping over the hoops or giving up on what I love. Because there are no stupid factions in FF14. And I can play multiple classes without hating myself.

I had several favorite characters in this game. They are still, mostly, alive. But do I care about them anymore? Jaina, Anduin, Sylvanas, Turalyon, Tyrande, Genn... No. I don’t care and it doesn’t even hurt anymore, it just feels like I had wasted my time and money. It feels exactly like how I felt during season 8 of GoT. An empty feeling of waste, so I leave.

Will I care about the characters or the story in FF14? I don’t know. I don’t think I will stick around if I don’t. But will I go back to WoW? A piece of me wants to hope for a superb turn around, but... Honestly? I don’t see it happening. And anything less than an epic turn around that fixes all of this, the lore, the classes, the playerbase division? I won’t bother anymore.

So off to the greener pastures! Maybe I will come crawling back within the blink of an eye, eating this post, repenting for ever having left. Maybe... I just don’t think so.

All righty, then. Opinions: Genn Greymane, Tyrande, Jaina.

Sweet sweet vengeance, eh? I’ll steal your keycard idea.

How I feel about this character

All the people I ship romantically with this character

My non-romantic OTP for this character

My unpopular opinion about this character

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

Genn Greymane:

1. I’ve liked him ever since I ran my first worgen through the zone back in Cata. I wouldn’t say he’s in my top favorites but that’s simply because he’s not a type of character I would generally be interested in, no fault of his own. He’s one of the better and more consistently written characters of Warcraft far as I’m concerned.2. His wife, I guess?3. The surrogate father/son relationship he has with Anduin is pretty good BUT but and this is my interpretation, it is not and can never truly be an objective, independent relationship because Genn has never properly grieved or accepted the death of his son (as is evidenced by him still ignoring his daughter), so it feels more like he took Anduin under his wing while being an incomplete person himself - and sometimes the advice he gives Anduin comes from a place of anger or vengeance rather than logic and experience as Anduin hopes. It’s... something, for sure. I have enjoyed following their exchanges. I also love the idea of him and Tyrande bonding over the events in Darkshore.4. He’s an asshole for treating his daughter so indifferently and putting even Anduin over her in his hierarchy of relationships. The only reason I remember he has a daughter at all is because everyone keeps asking where the fuck she is and why he doesn’t speak with/about her. That’s abusive parenting.5. I really hope he will not be written as the bad guy for not trusting the Horde and still wanting vengeance on Sylvanas. That would be a very shitty message to send alongside all your other shitty messages, blizzard :) 

I’m just gonna.... V

Tyrande Whisperwind:

oh boy1. oh boy.[editor’s note: we have redacted around 371 pages out of this, too]I really really loved her and she was probably one of my top favorite characters from WC3 up to recently. Her hypocrisy in Legion left me a bit ??? I do mean both her apparent racism towards the Nightborne for no reason and the fact that while you help her free Malfurion in Val’sharah as a Horde, in front of Suramar she’s like “oh.... you again. I’ll only let you live because you helped me.” which was also a bit ????? As someone who loves elves I do love her but what the fuck is up with the jarring writing for Horde players.Then comes the moment I truly disliked her beyond belief, which is during goddamn War Crimes. She hates orcs and she hates Garrosh, okay, but why the hell is she here.... pinning the crimes of the entire orcish race on him for some reason... Doing her best to try and get witnesses that had NOTHING to do with Garrosh to testify against him and the orcs (which was accepted??) ... She is visibly written as being very very kind towards any Alliance witnesses while ripping so hard into the Horde ones it’s surreal but the most jarring one was Saurfang whom she kept hounding into a full PTSD flashback and lockdown because she didn’t like the fact he had nothing incriminatory to say about Garrosh... Half the narrative describes her as an angel/goddess of justice and that one just gave me “bad preteen fanfic” whiplash.... Honestly it was really really awful. But since then I’ve sort of distanced myself from it and simply decided that was 100% Christie Golden and Chris Metzen and 0% the actual character.Then I restarted loving the fuck out of her during BFA and the... literal goddess of vengeance and justice fanfic tier twist. But at least she’s out here calling things as they are and doing something against Sylvanas while everyone else is twiddling their fucking thumbs going all “golly gee, do y’all think Sylvanas really doesn’t like us?”So... It’s Complicated. I have Feelings over Tyrande, and half the time I’m not even sure what they are.

2. Ironically I think she and Illidan would’ve worked better and this is absolutely because of the thing I mentioned in passing before - Blizzard writers cannot write romance. Malfurion and Tyrande was an end goal all along and like... “a fact” in their mind, so there’s basically no lovey dovey stuff. They kick ass together occasionally and they have each other’s back but there’s no real chemistry? But I would very much rather take this over their usual romance of “let’s argue for the sake of arguments because relationships need arguments”.I know Illidan’s feelings were added in as a bullshit love triangle thing seeing how Malfurion and Tyrande were never a “maybe they won’t be, eh?” thing. Poor Illidan then ends up sounding like a whiny, demanding teenager but at least his FEELINGS are described for her, which is more than we ever get for Malfurion who just .... is. That’s the best I can describe his relationship to her. He is. 

3. Her and Genn killing Sylvanas. But this one almost sounds perverse.

4. I don’t get why she hates orcs this much. No. I really do not. It’s stubbornness, it’s writer bias, it’s something no longer supported by the characterization alone. Yes the orcs chopped down trees. Yes the orcs killed Cenarius (who wasn’t even really dead but let’s not talk about that). But eventually, you gotta forgive and forget. And seeing how she forgives and forgets others for WAY WORSE [editor’s note: a 512 bullet point list including Maiev Shadowsong redacted out], there’s really no basis here other than racism? Which.... again, says bad things about the writers rather than the character.

5. I really wish they’d write her more consistently, that’s about it. I know she’s meant to be the Bad Cop of the Alliance but she’s all over the place. She works with us as Hordies and then tells us to piss off within the same expansion. She hates all orcs but she likes thrall (thanks Metzen.....). Like I said, I can’t even hate the character for this one, this is so obviously the writers being bad it’s just .... sigh. Let’s move on.

Jaina Proudmoore:

1. I love her too. Definitely one of my favorite Warcraft characters, ever since WC3.

2. Arthas. That was an OKAY thing, started really really sweet and we’re gonna ignore the whole rapey vibes of “don’t deny me, Jaina”. Only because I was blessed with seeing the worse version of Kalec’s “why do you have FEELINGS over Theramore still, Jaina? It’s been 3 months why aren’t you OVER seeing ALL your friends die? Don’t you care about MY feelings? SMH, women”. Both romances written by the same writer. Fun, innit?

3. I love what she has with Anduin whenever we’re blessed with them interacting, he always seems to be an anchor point for her even though he’s like half her age. 

4. //takes a deep breath// The high body count at Theramore was because of her, not Garrosh. Supported by Tides of War, not pulled out of my ass. She made the wrong call of not alerting the civilians to evacuate, and of bringing in more people into Theramore, because she was too overconfident in winning that battle. She was the one to tell her apprentice to stay, and so on and so forth. She put up a good fight, but considering the fact that she had a head warning, she could have avoided all that. Garrosh wanted the humans out of immediate Horde land vicinity - it would’ve been the same to him if Jaina took everyone and left Theramore. Although yes, he was hoping Jaina would bring in more Alliance officers so that he could cripple the Alliance army in one blow.I’m not going to cockily blame Jaina that she’s dumb or anything, absolutely not. She made a wrong call. It’s human to make wrong calls. It’s brilliant writing. What further irks me is that this was brushed under the carpet and suddenly the narrative again became a one-sided “Garrosh just came nuke us out of the blue I guess, poor us” as time went on. This is again 110% on the writers and not the characters. But I would’ve loved it to be part of her arc as time went on and she needs to get over the guilt of making a wrong call there too, as she has dealt with the guilt of “allowing” her father to die (it was not her fault that he wanted to fight the orcs, it doesn’t sit right with me when people are blaming her for it, but that’s an entirely different essay and our editors are pointing at the clock).

5. There is.... way too much “blame Jaina” going on in her arc. Which makes me blaming her for the body count at Theramore both a hypocrite and a jackass, but at least that one is supported by the narrative.No, what I mean is, again... blame her for her father’s choice. Blame her for her mother’s choice in the BFA arc (I heard that one too...). Blame her for poor poor Kalec being a manchild and not being able to cope with the concept of ‘woman has feelings and thoughts I disapprove of’. Blame her for Arthas’ descent into insanity.Poor girl has got the lion’s share of bad events in the narrative and I can see how her arc has gone all over the place. The problem is... yeah, I will say it. It’s once again, written badly. Great ideas, written terribly in many places. And in such weird ways, too. She is absolved of blame of things she does do (eg her people invading Southern Barrens and razing the tauren settlements - which is what prompted Garrosh to retaliate and raze Theramore but the writers and the fanbase claim was just a sudden, random thing). And then she is blamed for things she doesn’t do and would never logically be responsible for at all, like the choices of her father or her lovers? It’s just ........ it’s.......it’s Something for fucking sure.....What’s that saying? There’s so much to unpack here, let’s just burn the suitcase and call it a day?

Resignation: A Love Story

((I’m sorry this is so late, it takes place back in August when the stuff in Darkshore and Teldrassil happened!))

I should be in on the front, in Darkshore. Or, rather, if I were were still an officer of the Silvermoon military, I should be at the front, in Darkshore. As of yesterday, when I resigned my commission, I am no longer an officer or any other rank. My earlier misgivings about the Warchief's plans became reality when I saw the orange glow of Teldrassil burning in the distance like a second sunset from where I stood at the camp infirmary. They were similar to the misgivings I had since we've started mining the blood of our bleeding planet immediately after destroying the titanic enemy that has loomed over this world and all races of elves for over 10,000 years. As soon as we stepped off the broken planet of Argus, and the Warchief 's response was to weaponize the injury to our world against the Alliance we had just finished fighting alongside, I knew this would end in tears. There was a small hope that, maybe, Sylvanas would tread a different path than her predecessors, but that hope died along with countless kaldorei citizens. In a way, I suppose it was the logical progression for the Banshee Queen; she has displayed complete apathy for the living since the destruction of Southshore. Why would she suddenly spare a thought for any other living thing, be it our planet or unarmed civilians.

There were a hundred thoughts swimming through my brain, and those thoughts kept me quiet as I stepped out of the castle's double doors and walked towards the carriage house. It was a lovely day; one nice thing about living on the shoreline cliffs of Western Tirisfal was that, even during the hottest part of summer, it was never unbearably hot and the wind was constant. In a moment of nostalgia I recalled how the wind used to screech and wail through the castle hallways before Iloam and I repaired the ruined stone structure and patched the holes in walls and windows. He gifted this castle to me, and for years it was our project - rebuilding and restoring the seaside ruins into something more like a home. Now, it was definitely a home to me, and to my children. I also hoped it was a home to Iloam, but my Prince of Flaws is a traveller to his bones. Home for him will always be people more than places. If there was any part of the castle in particular that Iloam would claim as his home it would be the garage. The doors to the old carriage house were wide open, allowing Iloam’s music to escape and catch on the ocean breeze that also cooled the inside. Walking up to the doorway, I rapped my knuckles on the wood so he heard my approach and could ask me to leave if he was so inclined. That is how you give someone a place of their own; you respect their space and abide by their authority in that space. I like to think he appreciated the small show of respect; indeed, even as I lifted my hand to knock Iloam lifted his head from his motorbike to look towards me and offer a faint smile of greeting. I felt an answering smile tease my lips as I made my way inside towards speakers and amps against one wall. Carefully I climbed up atop one nearest to his workspace and made myself comfortable sitting with criss-crossed legs as the treble and bass of the music thrummed rhythmically under my backside. It brought on a small grin, and I wiggled idly in place, appreciating Iloam setting it up there for me to sit on and enjoy while I came to hang out with him. He knew how I liked the feel of the vibrations on my butt. It was just one of a million little things Iloam did to show me his love. From there I simply sat in my own silence, my gaze following Iloam as he returned to his tinkering. Music filled the empty space more comfortably than idle chatter would. Once I used to feel an almost desperate need to fill that silence with words. For the first couple years of our relationship I had hundreds of questions for him, gently and carefully probing and uncovering him little by little; not just for conversation, but also to still the doubts and anxieties that would threaten to drown me when it grew too quiet. He is not the kind of person who opens up or trusts easily, but neither of us are, really. However, I did enjoy learning about him, and all that same time he too was watching and listening. And now, 8 years later, although I still freely chattered Iloam's ear off often enough, I was quite content with our comfortable silence and just being close to him. Truthfully, I enjoyed just being silent and close to him more that I enjoyed talking and doing anything with anyone else. It was a soothing atmosphere to let my thoughts sink back into current events with the war, the slaughtered of Teldrassil, and my resignation. The music vibrated through me as I thought back to the march through those ancient forests. Rank and privaledge allowed me the option to leave the military at all; many did not have that choice. They would have to continue fighting this Warchief's battles as they have through the years, no matter who that Warchief was. There was a time I was eager to face the Alliance and fight against them. Just a couple years ago really, though it seems ages ago, when my fury over the treatment of our people at the hands of the humans - coupled with thier easy acceptance of the kaldorei who once exiled us - drove me to turn my hand against the enemies of the Horde. Then, Theramore happened. For the past few days I've  been trying to avoid thinking of Theramore, but now my mind shifted fully to it. We'd been fighting in the muggy swamp for weeks, and I was at the edge of Dustwallow when I watched the horrifying dome of the mana bomb grow and consume the city. I knew exactly what it was; I'd been to the Outlands and seen while Kael'thas went mad and attacked so many settlements with that same power. I knew then who had facilitated the destruction of Theramore - Hellscream may have ordered it, but sin'dorei gave him the weapon to do so. The realization filled me with terrible guilt and helpless rage at the position we'd put ourselves. No matter how angry I had been with the Alliance, our grievances did not warrent THIS response. Then, I had lingered in despair for days, and Iloam gave me those few days as space before taking me away for a short holiday to Nagrand. We slept outside and watched the stars and worlds move across the sky, and he held me and quietly comforted me. Iloam didn't naturally empathize with people, and he usually didn't really get why people felt one way or another. But he knew I was in pain, and he immediately decided upon a plan of action to address it. He didn’t get why I cared, I why I despaired, but still he held me as I cried and murmured comforting words to bring my thoughts from drowning in that deep lake of grief. When that happened, I had been close to leaving the Horde army. I ended up staying because I felt our people needed to redeem ourselves. So I was eager to fight alongside Silvermoon forces when we finally rose up against Hellscream and the Korkron. As we defeated them, I felt better about fighting for the Horde, especially when the Legion finally came. There was an enemy that threatened all of life on Azeroth, whether Horde, Alliance, or others. It was the first war since Northrend against the Scourge where I felt our cause was right, and I eagerly coordinated House Akh’Argar's forces and Jericho with the greater Horde army. And then... when the Horde army invaded Darkshore, I was called upon as I've been called for every battle the Horde fights since the Sin'dorei joined it. So many lives lost against the Burning Legion, so many homes destroyed from when thier ships attacked, and instead of healing and rebuilding, we were again being called to war? And not even meaningful war, but an attack on Alliance lands as if we hadn't spent the last year and a half fighting and bleeding at thier sides. I knew the Dark Lady maintained her own grievances against some Alliance leaders, and many of them still blamed us for the death of thier King, but this sudden agression seemed absolute folly. I know my House’s soldiers were exhausted from the war against the Legion. I would not be calling them to fight in these battles in Kalimdor. They would be sent to keep watch on the borders of Quel'thalas for when the Alliance gathered thier completely understandable retaliation. But I was a Silvermoon Officer, and when the Horde armies called, I was duty bound to obey. But even then... I didn't want to be there. I didn't want to see another Theramore. And now Teldrassil burned, and I resigned. What would the nobility of Silvermoon think of me now? What would they think of my House? That was the thing that weighed on me the most. What have my actions done to the reputation of Akh'Argar? Would my own soldiers, the people of my House, have any respect for me now? Or would they see me as a dishonorable coward for leaving just as things began to get really messy on the front. A deep sigh escaped me, lost in the thrum of the bass mechguitar playing through the speakers. My eyes returned to the present, and the sweaty, freckled shoulders hunched and flexing as eight nimble fingers worked at the dirty bike engine. I had no idea what Iloam was doing, what tiny adjustment was required for the machine. As a surgeon, I generally don't futz with things until they actually break, and then I fixed them with the hope of that fix being permanent. I'd learned that tinkering is not exactly the same; sure there were broken things you fixed, but there seemed to be continual adjustments and improvements that you could impliment if you were so inclined. And seeing as Iloam had about four bikes, he had a lot to work with. There was something about being able to observe Iloam like this. He enjoyed having me there with him too, even if we didn't speak or touch. His back was turned on me almost completely, and that was a huge thing in and of itself. Although his own thoughts wandered elsewhere, he was comfortable enough to have his back on me - no, not just comfortable. More than comfortable. He trusted me to watch his back. Another tiny thing; another huge expression of intense love. When I burst into his office at Blacksong Records and announced I was quitting the military, his only response was "Alright." He didn’t ask why, he didn't look at me like a coward ot traitor, he just instantly respected my decision with no change in his regard for me. Today he still was willing to let me watch his back. I thought back to the day he tried to "distract" me when I was still so distant and melancholy weeks after Theramore fell. I was fully overcome with worry and grief, so Iloam decided a fun way to entertain me would be to play hide and seek somewhere in the Azeroth. The twist was that he'd drunk some kind of poison so there was a time limit: I would have to find him before he died. I was so furious with him. After I found him and treated him, I brought him back here to the castle, back before it was fully restored, with the intention of carving my rage into his flesh so he would never again doubt his importance to me. However, Iloam managed to stop me before I even started when he insisted he was never in any real danger, because he had faith in me, that I would find him. It was such a shocking claim, from him of all people, that he believed in me - Iloam, who learned long ago never to believe in anyone. That very thing stayed constantly on my mind, that no matter what was going on, Iloam believed in me and had faith in us. He backed those words up time and again with his actions, with the way he fought his own inclinations and tried in so many ways, large and small, on the basis of that belief. No matter what society and nobility thought of me, no matter what my own House thought, Iloam would always stand with me. He wouldn't disparage me or doubt me. He had faith in me, in us. It was enough - it was everything. As the current song ended and the next song began with its bassy opener, I slid off the amp and walked over to my Prince of Flaws at his sweaty, grungy work. He heard and felt my movement, and paused hid own, one long ear quirked up as he listened for my approach. I leaned down to press my lips against his sweaty, freckled shoulder, and leaned in to speak in his ear so he would hear over the music, "I love you. Thank you for always believing in me." Then I nipped his earlobe a bit. You know. Just because.

I'll take you up on that! Uthelria, Volita, and VoljinxSylvanas! Pick one or do all three~~ ^w^

I’M SCREAMING KAT YOU SENT ME MY ORIGINAL VOL’JIN OTP (AND BY EXTENSION, MY ORIGINAL SYLVANAS OTP) I’M SCREAM.

@druidickats​ OKAY HERE WE GO EVERYTHING IT IS--- becauseihavenoselfcontrol

U’thel x Sylria!

who takes longer showers?

U’thel. Because he actually really likes being clean NGL. I’m sure that if he takes too long Sylria will just walk in there with him like “wash my hair if you’re going to take this long” and he just DOES it begrudgingly and totally not because he likes to run his fingers through her hair.

(And the rest under the cut PFFT)

how do they make up after a fight?

I WASN’T SURE ABOUT THIS AT FIRST but then I thought about love languages and remembered that U’thel L I V E S to please his partner, if he was wrong in the fight, it would probably be easier for a make up NGL. Since all he’d be focused on is trying to make it up to her by pleasing her, whether that be by going and getting her her favorite snack, or, y’know, something else. A mutual fight probably ACTUALLY HAS DISCUSSION. If U’thel was “right” well…. I’m not too sure how a make up would happen after that, since he’s so… U’thel. RIP. I might be able to think of something more cohesive later, BUT MMMM for now I’ll go with this???

who prefers rain and who prefers sun?

U’thel doesn’t really like the rain, so I’ll go with Sylria prefers the rain and U’thel prefers the sun. Especially the non-Broken Shore sun. Because apparently that sun is different (U’thel ur logic makes NO SENSE). Also I have this feeling that Sylria might just prefer the rain because there was one time U’thel saw her standing in it and just stared because “oh she pretty”. (DON’T ASKE ME WHERE THAT CAME FROM IDK BUT THERE HAVE IT).

what’s their favorite place to go together?

I established this in a really short drabble (called Allure for anyone curious), but it’s Val’sharah. It’s one of those “in their genetics” sort of thing. Nature is where they feel most at home, whether they recognize it or not. That, and being surrounded by life when most of their lives - particularly U’thel’s - has been so immersed in death is just… one of the more pleasant things. And it doesn’t really matter where in Val’sharah, so long as it’s just them and nature~

who’s more likely to be voted prom king/queen?

SYLRIA BECAUSE WITH THAT ATTITUDE U’THEL AIN’T GETTIN’ ANYTHING OKAY. HE’S GOT THE LOOKS BUT THAT PERSONALITY LEAVES A LOT TO BE DESIRED YA’LL.

do they celebrate anniversaries, etc.?

I have a feeling they enjoy holidays more than anything else. Brewfest has a special place in U’thel’s heart because it’s where he gets his Wolpertinger from (for basically everyone else, because only Kat knows this atm, but U’thel has a soft spot for rabbits. They’re his favorite animal, and after he got drunk at Brewfest he SAW A WOLPERTINGER AND JUST. WENT AWOL TRYING TO CATCH IT– obviously he eventually succeeded but the amount of things he nearly broke in the meantime is amazing) - but let’s not get started on Noblegarden. Because holy fuck U’thel is going to love Noblegarden (see “SYLRIA. HOLY FUCK. THERE ARE RABBITS EVERYWHERE. HOLY SHIT. YOU CAN BE A RABBIT” and yes he would promptly stick rabbit ears on her. I’m so sorry Sylria ur stuck with this). Not too sure what Sylria’s favorite holiday might be, so correct me if I’m wrong! I feel like she’d enjoy Midsummer Festival the most. Because of smth you told me on Discord, Kat~ As for other things, like birthdays and anniversaries, I’m not too sure? I can see U’thel wanting to because he’s a pleaser though O: !

who’d pressure the other into singing karaoke?

Listen U’thel is going to run away from anyone who tries to make him sing because I can actually see him having a decent singing voice cuz dem genetics though. If Sylria ever finds out I can see her just trying to get him to sing… a lot.

what’s their nightly routine?

Hrm… U’thel is the sort to spend the whole day DOING ALL OF EVERYTHING and then just crashing when he finally gets to rest (he’s an early riser, and not a night person at all). I can see part of their eventual nightly routine being Sylria probably reading to him until he falls asleep. And then cuddles ensue. I’d have to think more about this though, but I mean this is a start!

who’s more likely to burn dinner?

I’M SORRY SYLRIA BUT U’THEL IS A REALLY DECENT COOK BECAUSE HE HAD TO DO THAT BY HIMSELF FOR SUCH A LONG TIME SO IT’S YOU, YOU’RE MORE LIKELY TO BURN DINNER.

Vol’jin x Amita!

who takes longer showers?

Oh my GAWD Amita. And she doesn’t shower, she bathes. If Vol’jin EVER goes in there while she’s in there he’s going to get dragged in and be forced to sit through her being really attentive to grooming him, especially his hair. Amongst other things. They might need a second shower WHOOPS.

how do they make up after a fight?

Oh damn… it starts with sitting side by side, I know that much. There’s a lot of sitting in silence before they finally start a conversation, and depending on which one feels more responsible for the fight depends on who starts it (ex. If Vol’jin thinks about it and later decides he was at fault, he starts the conversation, and vice versa if Amita is the one who feels it was her fault). This is more applicable to when they’re adults (which is FUNNILY ENOUGH when most of their fights happen), but yeah. The short of it is, they talk it out. Depending on the level of frustration though, it gets worked out a different way ya’ll. (And yeah, it depends a lot on what the fight was about too! And honestly Amita is really REALLY weak when it comes to Vol’jin, so she can’t stay mad at him for an incredibly extensive amount of time. I’LL PROBABLY FIGURE THIS OUT BETTER LATER TOO HAHAHA but I mean, it’s a start!)

who prefers rain and who prefers sun?

Amita prefers the sun, and Vol’jin prefers the rain. Amita has a slight aversion to water after something that happens in Pikit Mata, so while she still enjoys the rain, she’d rather stay dry (but of course Vol’jin can coax her out into the rain HUEHUE), and I mean, all of her druid forms are reptilian, and reptiles love to bask; Amita is no exception. Vol’jin has a preference to the rain because I feel it’s one of those things that reminds him of First Home.

what’s their favorite place to go together?

Oooh this is a tough one. I might come back to this later, actually, for a more specific place, but they both have a preference to being in more private places (because for a lot of the story they’re trying - and somewhat failing - to hide that there’s more between them than just “we’re childhood friends”. This is especially true after the MoP arc in Lascivious Ophidian and I’ll… get there eventually). So for now, their favorite place to go together is anywhere they can be alone, just the two of them.

who’s more likely to be voted prom king/queen?

I think they would both be hahaha! They both have the personalities and looks, so they’d be voted prom king/queen together xP

do they celebrate anniversaries, etc.?

Anniversaries definitely. Amita is a giver (*COUGH*), which I’m pretty sure Vol’jin enjoys. Birthdays I’m not too sure, because I honestly don’t know HOW TROLLS DO THE BIRTHDAY THING– (aside from sketchygoat’s idea that there’s a huge coming of age celebration, which would only be celebrated at one point during a troll’s life, and then they’d have another celebration again at a certain age). As for holidays, I can actually see them both enjoying Brewfest together the most, and probably Winter’s Veil. Amita will not admit that she really REALLY likes to celebrate Love is in the Air, and definitely doesn’t make it obvious that she keeps leaving things around for Vol’jin to find because why would she do that, of course she wouldn’t (he picks up on it and starts inconspicuously doing the same thing and I definitely don’t like the idea of them sending each other on LITTLE TREASURE HUNTS please that’s adorable, and since in origin stuff they were ALWAYS “playing” cat and mouse– I’LL STOP THERE BUT PLEASE). I have no idea what happened to this paragraph BUT IT GOT OUT OF HAND. I also don’t even know if I’m answering this question right, BUT DO I CARE NO I LIKE WHAT I’M DOING.

who’d pressure the other into singing karaoke?

AMITA WOULD PRESSURE VOL’JIN BECAUSE SHE WOULD DEFINITELY JUST WANT TO SCREAM WITH HIM– I also kind of have a penchant for just making every single character good at singing because I can sing and enjoy singing, but I also like the idea of both of them doing fine, then they just start singING OFF KEY AFTER A FEW MINUTES because yes. And trying to out off-key sing each other and everyone else regrets letting them do this.

what’s their nightly routine?

I’ll go with when they’re actually in the same area together for an extended period of time (this also going off the basis that Vol’jin and Amita have already . It starts with them hugging each other. If there’s somewhere they can freshen up, then they do that next. Amita, as it is hopefully already obvious, loves to play with other people’s hair, so she spends some time grooming Vol’jin (and during this, they also have the chance to chat about their days). Vol’jin returns the favor, of course, and Amita has a tendency to relax into him when he brushes her hair. It can go one of two ways from there. They either opt to slide into bed and continue to chatter until one of them falls asleep, or after the grooming - and this is of course reliant on the mood - things will get a little more affectionate / steamy. There u w u

who’s more likely to burn dinner?

Amita, because she can get a little absent minded when she cooks and forgets what she’s doing. It doesn’t happen ALL the time, but it happens enough. Especially over campfires. She’s better with a more controlled flame. Vol’jin sometimes just notices her huddling REALLY CLOSE to the fire. Meanwhile, the fish she’s cooking is also up in flames. This poor reptile girl JUST WANTS TO BE WARM–

Vol’jin x Sylvanas!

who takes longer showers?

Vol’jin. He definitely drags Sylvanas into them though, because it’s an excuse for him to crank up the heat as Sylvanas’ chilled body does a decent job at keeping him cool in the face of said heat. And totally not because he wants to encourage her to put a little more effort into self-care (also, quick undead / Forsaken headcanon: if they bathe in scented water, their bodies adopt that scent, due to having more pourous skin. They would have to like, soak in it for a while, but hey, who said the undead can’t smell good?)

how do they make up after a fight?

Oh man. By shooting arrows together. I can just see Sylvanas being so damn frustrated at points, where she just storms into Vol’jin’s office, grabs him by the ear, and drags him off to the archery range. There’s something she discovered about shooting arrows with him when she was mad at him that helped to clear the air a little bit. Otherwise, they resort to getting really, and I mean REALLY professional. Talk about the fight and what went wrong and what they could do differently and why it happened and YEAH. I think it makes sense for both of them to try to iron it out that way!

who prefers rain and who prefers sun?

I still think that Vol’jin has a preference to the rain - even in this ship - but I also feel Sylvanas has a preference to the rain. She’s been a creature of the shadows for so long, I can’t imagine her enjoying being in the sun, especially since it’ll probably remind her of Quel’thalas, and what it was like when she was still alive. Things are already painful enough for her, she doesn’t need to be reminded of when she was alive (and likely happier). I fancy the idea of Vol’jin picking up on this and, given that he’s so tall, standing in front of the sun so his shadow falls over her.

what’s their favorite place to go together?

There’s a spot in Hillsbrad that they rather like. It works as a relatively easy place for them to escape to when they’re both in the Undercity (usually for business, of course). As for when they’re both in Orgrimmar, there’s a spot in Azshara that they favor going to so that they can have a few moments of privacy away from prying eyes and prying ears.

who’s more likely to be voted prom king/queen?

Vol’jin hands down. I’m sorry Sylv ur hot but ur ice queen personaLITY MAKES U UNPOPULAR IN THESE VOTES--- good thing Vol’jin knows how to melt you I mean what.

do they celebrate anniversaries, etc.?

Sylvanas got Vol’jin really into Hallow’s End and he’s not sure if he regrets this or not. Bonus that I can see Vol’jin getting all excited about Day of the Dead (at least... the version of it in WoW, which... I’m not sure how closely it matches real world Day of the Dead BECAUSE I ALWAYS MISS IT). I can just see them both celebrating these holidays hardcore, with Sylvanas figuring out a way to get Vol’jin all dressed up for Hallow’s End, and Vol’jin returns the favor on Day of the Dead by getting Sylv all face painted up y’know? And in colorful, probably tribal gear because listen Sylv would look REALLY GOOD in tribal stuff.

who’d pressure the other into singing karaoke?

Vol’jin would do this so hardcore because 1) Sylvanas can canonically sing and 2) her voice is fucking gorgeous. You know that something he says to her a lot is “sing for me, Sylvanas” - and you can take that however your brain takes it~~

what’s their nightly routine?

Following another undead / Forsaken headcanon of mine, is that they don’t have to sleep. Sylvanas lets Vol’jin groom her, especially if he’s had a stressful day (I like to think that being able to groom their partner is incredibly stress relieving for a troll). It slowly goes from there, to her semi returning the favor by running her fingers through his hair. It will then spiral into Sylvanas singing Vol’jin to sleep. The other Horde leaders totally don’t crowd the door and listen in on the singing sometimes.

who’s more likely to burn dinner?

Sylvanas because I don’t actually know if she needs to eat anymore. I do fancy the idea of her knowing how to cook some really specific things that she gets perfect every time and no one understands HOW SHE DOES IT SHE JUST DOES (like getting a marshmallow perfectly brown all the way around, that sort of really specific). And wow I apparently headcanon Vol’jin as a pretty good cook from the look of things.

it’s 5AM and i’m pissed about warcraft (mostly lore) again

I have a personal chip on my shoulder against Overwatch for reasons that might not be wholly valid. Project Titan (original OW) was started, and Blizz started to shift people around. Jeff Kaplan switched from working on WoW to Titan, and the game eventually got cancelled in 2014. Cataclysm’s released heralded a downturn for the quality of the game, not just in terms of lore.  The xpacs had a few good things in them (MoP is one of my favorites, the pandaren have great lore), but there was a lot of shit in there too. WoD was barebones as shit in terms of content with a completely nonsense storyline that took a huge shit on the lore. Titan was cancelled and recycled into Overwatch, a move that divided developers and even caused Metzen to quit.  I don’t blame or hold anger at Metzen for quitting (the guy had a fucking baby on the way, he needed to be a dad), but when he announced he was retiring, that’s when Warcraft really lost its magic to me and when I fell out of love with it.

So I blame Overwatch for what happened to Warcraft, which isn’t necessarly fair. Overwatch is fun and well made (in terms of art style that is, everything else is debatable). Maybe it makes more sense to blame the writers for losing their touch. But I still hold that slight disdain for Overwatch, even if it’s unfair. But enough about that; let’s talk about shitty lore.

Cataclysm is where the game just became bogged down with bad lore decisions, consisting of forced conflict and characters acting against their established selves to make said forced conflict happen.

Garrosh being made warchief was the first in a long laundry list of bad decisions. There was no reason Thrall would’ve logically made him leader even when being Grom’s son. It was evident he was not suited for this position and someone like Vol’jin or Saurfang should’ve taken the reins. He would’ve either kept him as a high ranking general like Nazgrim or waited until he matured a bit more and mellowed out to give him the mantle. It’s such a bullshit promotion that exists only to force conflict and have lore why PvP is still a thing (because it’s not like we can just have pvp be noncanon like bungie did with classic halo jesus fuck blizz you’re not 343 you don’t need to give pvp lore validity of fucking course the racial leaders aren’t really dead despite me killing them smh)

Garrosh is a bumbling inconsistent mess. In the books, Garrosh is smarter, but in the games, he’s a goddamn idiot and a brat with no sense of responsibility who blames Thrall during their fight in Nagrand (despite the fact that thrall literally left eitrigg, vol’jin, saurfang, and cairne behind to help him deal with shit and he tells them all to fuck off. also blaming thrall for him having to pick up the pieces is bullshit when he almost broke the horde because he literally kept trying to push the other races down into subservience, to a point where he tried to assassinate vol’jin). So Garrosh had no accountability as a leader. His whole plan to establish orcish supremacy and “make the horde great again” shows he has no fucking clue about orcish history despite his dad being IN THE SHIT. Orcish supremacy was all a lie concocted by Ner’zhul to fearmonger the draenei as evil invaders. Before the Horde, all the clans did was just live separately and fight the ogre empire who just wanted to enslave them. The Horde only exists because Kil’jaedan manipulated them into becoming one to wipe out the draenei. Garrosh doesn’t even know his own people’s fucking lore. Oh, and an extra special fuck you from when he said Thrall is no longer an orc. Nobody in the entire Warcraft lore has any right to tell Thrall he isn’t an orc. Thrall was a literal child soldier raised by Blackmoore to fight like an animal in his colosseum (his fucking name literally means SLAVE). The only human friend he had during his childhood was raped and beheaded and even lets Blackmoore’ men go free after he kills him in honorable combat.  Thrall has the most validity out of anyone in the Horde to be against the Alliance, but he just wants to give his people a home after the Legion stole it all and turned them into murderers. So anyway Garrosh can go fuck himself (except none of what I said actually matters because warlords of draenor established that all orcs are evil murderers even without demon blood so everything warcraft 3 was about means nothing i guess fuck you blizzard). Also, miss me with that bullshit about honor™ when you use a bomb to vaporize your enemies and not fight them by yourself on the fields of battle like your dad would’ve.

The Alliance hasn’t been written as morally grey or written to have flaws since Warcraft 3. Aside from Arthas’ and Jaina’s storylines, the rest of the Alliance is a bunch of assholes. Grom is forced to drink from the demon pool because the night elves started murdering them after they went to Ashenvale to cut down trees so they can build settlements to protect the orcs and their new tauren allies. The same allies the night elves just up and abandoned to be fucking murdered by the centaur almost to extinction despite how Cenarius himself blessed Huln Highmountain for his bravery for the tauren helping fight the legion alongside the kaldorei ten thousand years ago. So big fucking lore oversight, right? Also, since the kaldorei can just grow trees everywhere, why is there a logging crisis with the Horde? They can literally replace the trees right there. In fact, they could literally have solved the Horde’s famine crisis, but they don’t because they’re a bunch of stingy fucks who never get their shit called out. When people complain about Alliance favoritism, this is what they mean. The Horde always has to be the villain in some way, and the Alliance are always the good™ guys who never do anything wrong ever™. The closest we’ve gotten to the Alliance being somewhat morally grey was Camp Taurajo (which is swept under the rug with the biggest bullshit handwave by baine saying ehh it’s okay because that’s a realistic reaction). Jaina just straight up lets her men burn down and kill a bunch of native farmers whose race has lived here for years and never has to acknowledge this directly.

Jaina is almost as mishandled as Garrosh was. In the early days of MoP, they screwed up her being the anti-Horde character but could’ve salvaged it. Now they’ve just made her near irredeemable trash. So after Garrosh blows up Theramore and kills all her men, she’s pissed and out for blood and justifiably so. You want her to kill that motherfucker, but Blizzard doesn’t know about this thing called “moderation” or “reasonable chracter development” so they just decide to crank her up to 22 and have her be a stone cold murderer. She’s just gonna drown Orgrimmar and kill all sorts of innocent civilians inside, including an entire fucking orphanage of children she knows good and well exists since she’s visited the city many times before. Completely missed her the first time (because someone who watched her ex-fiance burn down an entire city including the children would be okay with killing children i guess). Thrall shows up and tries to tell her “hey, child murder is fucked up” and she doesn’t bother listening (apparently thrall isn’t allowed to be upset by children being victims of war despite having been a child slave himself but it’s somehow his fault because he made garrosh warchief even though there was no way he could’ve known this would’ve happen but whatever conflict i guess). So Kalecgos then shows up (who apparently is just her token love interest now and will never show up in the game to do anything useful so all that development he had in cataclysm is now moot. like fucking aggra at least helped thrall at the echo isles kalecgos didn’t do shit) and tells her “hey, child murder is bad” and it finally clicks in her head (so it took three times for her to figure out that she shouldn’t let small children die). Then we flash forward to Legion where Blizz has just decided they just don’t give a shit. Jaina shows up to Stormwind Keep and is pissed that the Horde abandoned the Alliance at the Broken Shore. So a grown ass woman in her 30s proceeds to be condescending and talk shit to a seventeen year old boy who just LOST HIS DAD about not wanting to fight two wars at once and risk crippling the Alliance (because apparently kul yiras no longer exists so she just can’t fund her own damn war i guess. also jaina apparently possesses a teleportation spell established since wotlk to exist that would’ve allowed her to save varian wrynn before he died so thanks a lot for the pointless death that could’ve been avoided for lore reasons, blizz. also we’re just supposed to forgive her racist piece of shit dad for wanting to commit ethnic cleansing and kill little orcish children because jaina needs to angst). Then she gets written out of the plot so Anduin never gets to call her out on the bullshit she tried to pull and so Blizz can shelve her for another forced war conflict. So Jaina has literally developed backwards to the beginning of Warcraft 3. Thanks, Blizz.

Sylvanas has angsted since WC3 that undeath is a curse and nobody should be subjected to it, only for Blizzard to keep turning her into Lich King 2.0 when we get Warlords of Northrend™ eventually (undeath is bad and i angst about it 24/7 so let me use all these chemicals to raise these people into zombies and plague the land but it’s okay because i think slavery is bad at least. also she’s afraid of going to hell to be tortured forever when it’s like “hey you dumb bitch maybe you wouldn’t go to hell if you didn’t keep raising people into zombies after establishing it’s a LIVING HELL TO BE A ZOMBIE”). So Sylvanas has also developed backwards. Thanks again, Blizz.

I’ve written this twice before, but Illidan is the biggest load of bullshit ever. In Warcraft 3, he was a great antihero. Kind of a dick, but you admired that he was out for himself. Now he’s the greatest™ hero™ ever™ that did nothing wrong™. He’s like a worse Anakin Skywalker.

All of WoD

anyway i’m going the fuck to sleep and then wake up in 5 hours to write wow fanfic to fill the hole that blizz’s nonsense created