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jacobtmcelroy-blog · 7 years

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Marvel Films Ranked (1998 to 2016)

Comic book films. In my opinion, they are their own genre now. Why is this? Well, look how many are coming out in a year nowadays. A good portion of the summer blockbuster season belongs to the superhero genre alone. Over the past twenty years, there’s been a superfluous amount of Marvel films. Many of them meh, some of them good, and others flat out atrocious. So, I have compiled a list of my personal rankings on the matter. Let’s knock this out.

Also, I will be discussing spoilers at a few points, so beware.

THE ATROCIOUS TIER

43. Man-Thing (2005)

Want to know how bad Man-Thing is? The entire test audience walked out of the theater before the film was even done playing. True story. Because of this, the film was relegated to become a Sci-fi original movie instead of being released in theaters. Yikes. At least one of the film’s stars, Rachael Taylor, would go on to do much greater things in the Jessica Jones Netflix series as Trish Walker.

42. Hulk (2003)

No, that’s not an early development picture of Shrek. Ang Lee’s Hulk has a cult following who love the psychological approach he took to the film. That is cool and their opinion. However, this film harms me psychologically. From the lack of smashing things (It’s a Hulk film!), to the ludicrous plot, to the zombie dog fights, and the part where the Hulk flew on a plane to space, 2003′s Hulk is a boring mess that is not even fun for laughs.

41. Fantastic Four (2015)

What do you get when you combine a group of young, talented actors and a somewhat promising director with a studio that is desperately trying to hold the rights to their non-X-Men Marvel properties? A really, really bad movie is what. Fan4stic, as many call it, is an unorganized train wreck from the production issues down to the person who decided to film every scene in the dark The mid-2000′s films look great compared to this mess.

40. X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

This movie did not even need to be a thing honestly. We got enough backstory of Wolverine in X2, and he is the main character in the first three films. Anyways, Origins is a flat out mess. Memory wiping bullets? Special effects worse than the first X-Men? (seriously look how bad his claws look) The Merc with a mouth missing his mouth?! This is just a bad movie. No wonder there were not any other Origins films like originally planned.

39. Blade: Trinity (2014)

Before being booked into a jail cell for tax evasion, Wesley Snipes and his new allies imprison the unlucky viewers of this film into a sentence of 113 minutes of pure boredom. Blade: Trinity is dull, forgettable, and takes away most of the fun the first two films had (even with Dracula as a villain!) It is hard to believe director David S. Goyer, writer of the Dark Knight Trilogy, directed this blood-reduced suckfest.

Still Pretty Bad Tier

38. Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance (2012)

Ghost Rider and the sort of sequel that nobody asked for should be the real title. While Nicolas Cage gives a better, and much loonier performance here, the storytelling and execution really came up short here. Spirit of Vengeance cannot decide what it wants to be. It goes from dark and serious, zany and erratic, to mid-2000′s Nicolas Cage mode at a dizzying and confusing rate.

37. Elektra (2005)

In all honesty, Jennifer Garner isn’t a bad Elektra. Not as good as Elodie Yung’s recent version, but Garner does the best she can with the awful script. The film takes itself WAY too seriously and does not have any sort of fun. Some of the plot twists are ludicrous too. The biggest flaw of the film though is the fact it focuses more on some random girl and her dad almost more than Elektra herself.

36. Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007)

The second modern stab at Fantastic Four was unfortunately worse than the first. While I still actually like the casting, (especially Michael Chiklis as The Thing) no one can save the film from the deranged screenwriters who turned Galactus into a giant hungry cloud. The plot and execution also leaves some to be desired. At least it is not as frustrating as the Silver Surfer NES game.

35. X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

If we are ranking the worst adaptations of actual comic book story lines, then X3 would probably take the top prize. Brian Singer’s departure from this film for the snorefest better known as Superman Returns tanked both films at the same time. Here, Magneto flat out looked like an idiot after his infinitely stupid plan back-fired. Cyclops died after five minutes of screen time and somehow did as much as he did in the other films. Mystique lost her abilities... for some plot reason. Angel did pretty much nothing after being the focus character in the opening tease. X3 is just a massive disappointment.

Tier of Mediocrity

34. Ghost Rider (2007)

How do you make a badass anti-hero a lot less cool? Give him the most generic origin story in history. Ghost Rider is honestly not an awful film, it just feels like a tired retread of every other superhero origin story. Oh, but that is not the only problem with the film. Some of the humor is really oddly timed and does not hit a lot. The villain is mostly unmemorable. Sam Elliott is really good when he is on screen, but the most the writers let him do is ride a firey horse in a straight line.

33. Spider-man 3 (2007)

I am actually surprised I ranked this as high as I did. Spider-man 3 is one of my biggest movie disappointments in history. The plot is over-bloated with WAY too many characters (3 villains?!) and subplots, Uncle Ben’s death is downgraded to an accident, and every scene Emo, Cool Peter Parker is in makes my facepalm and cringe at the same time. Yeah, that piano/bar scene is absolutely painful. Venom is absolutely wasted too. If there are so many problems, why is this film not lower? There are good scenes hidden inside this waste dump of a film. The scene in the tower where Peter rips off the symbiote is good. Another is the scene after the Sandman gains his abilities and struggles to pick up the locket. The first fight with Sandman is pretty good too. Overall, Spidey 3 is a disappointing, bloated mess.

32. Fantastic Four (2005)

The Mediocre Four return! The first modern Fantastic Four movie is complicated by a lame plot where the heroes are trying to get rid of their powers rather than use them. Also, the mis-fired plot is not executed very well as the scenes feel like somewhat connected moments patched together into a finished project at times. Although, not all is bad here. While the scenes feel all over the place at times, some of them are pretty fun. I personally like the entire cast, particularly Chris Evans’ Human Torch and Michael Chiklis’ The Thing.

31. Thor: The Dark World (2013)

This film is so forgettable and mediocre I almost forgot it existed. Not much else to say. Time to move on.

30. Iron Man 3 (2013)

All I really need to ask here, is why whose brilliant idea was it to turn the Mandarin into... whatever on earth he is in the finished product?! Late 2000′s M. Night Shyamalan? Seriously. It is kind of like when they were adapting the Harry Potter movies, if the director decided to turn Voldemort into a comic relief villain with Wormtail as the true villain of the franchise. Ugh. Besides that major error, I guess there is some fun action scenes in the film and Robert Downey Jr. is as good as always.

29. DareDevil (2003)

DareDevil is my favorite Marvel hero, so this film may be higher than a lot of other people put it. The casting of this film is pretty good as I think Ben Afleck’s Matt Murdock actually is pretty good. His DareDevil is decent in comparison.Jennifer Garner’s Elektra lacks some of the edge of the original character,but she’s not bad either. The problems here begin with execution. The scenes, like Fantastic Four, feel patched together and do not flow well at several points making the film feel a bit all over the place. It almost feels like an entire story line is missing. Hmm.....

Hey, These Are Decent Tier

28. X-Men Apocalypse (2016)

Instead of making Magneto looking like a dumbass, 2016′s X-Men film forces that label on Professor X. However, the film’s main problem is that the whole world takeover plot is really forgettable. Mixed in with all of the mediocrity are some good performances and memorable scenes. A couple of these include another ingenious Quicksilver rescue and when Magneto destroys Auschwitz. Otherwise, this X-Men film feels like eating Days of Future Past two week old leftovers.

27. Iron Man 2 (2010)

Iron Man 2: Filler Man. Seriously, Iron Man 2 almost feels like an anime filler episode. At the end of the film, the characters and the plot do not advance at all from where they were at the beginning of the film in the Expanded Universe. Mickey Rourke’s meh Whiplash did not really help much. However, Robert Downey Jr., Gwyneth Paltrow, and newly added Don Cheadle are all really good here. Additionally, Sam Rockwell gives a really fun performance as Justin Hammer, making him one of the better pseudo-villains of the MCU.

26. The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)

First off, The Amazing Spider-man is definitely not a bad film. Actually it is a pretty decent film. The film’s downfall is it feels like a complete retread of the 2002 film, and even the most talented cast cannot save that. I actually laughed last time I heard how hard Uncle Ben tried to rephrase, “With great power comes great responsibility.”. The Lizard is a decent villain, but he’s nowhere near as good as either villain from the first two Raimi films. Basically the TASM is a lower quality version of a movie that already exists. The lone big improvement I can think of is the love story and Garfield’s Spider-man.

25. Thor (2011)

Chris Hemsworth was the perfect cast as Thor, as was Tom Hiddleston as Loki. The scenes in Thor in which the two interacted were a blast to watch. However, everything else was just decent. There were some comical scenes, such as when Thor screams “Another!” and breaks the glass on the floor, but everything else in the real world did not really leave a lasting impact on me. Not a bad film, but not near Marvel’s best effort.

24. Punisher: War Zone (2008)

Some of you reading this are probably shaking your heads in disgust or absolute confusion. How on earth did this commercial and critical failure rank this high on my list? War Zone is probably one of the most entertaining films I have ever seen in the ridiculous, over-the-top action movie genre. Ray Stevenson is a good Punisher. More importantly, Dominic West’s Jigsaw along with Doug Hutchison’s Loony Bin Jim are so over the top and cartoony that they make Colin Farrell’s Bullseye look down to earth. Everything is so overly violent, completely stupid, and laughable in this film that it entertains every time I re-watch it. That is why War Zone ranks this high.

23. The Amazing Spider-man 2 (2014)

Similarly to the last entry, some may question the higher rank of TASM 2 and the fact it is higher ranked than its generally better received predecessor. TASM 2 definitely has a web of problems, but not all is bad. The chemistry of Garfield’s Peter Parker and Emma Stone’s Gwen Stacy is really, really believable and well done. While many others did not, I actually liked Dane Dehaan’s Harry Osbourne due to his different approach to the character. Despite these positives, tone uneveness (Jamie Foxx’s Electro for instance) and a general lack of direction at times really brings TASM down from the better film it could have been.

22. Doctor Strange (2016)

Doctor Strange is really uniquet. As one may expect of an actor of his caliber, Bennedict Cumberbatch is a really nice fit as the title character. Also, the soundtrack kicks some major ass. However, the villains of the film are really mediocre and some of the most forgettable in the MCU, which is saying a lot. A good film, but just midpack in a solid library.

21. Blade (1998)

The first of the modern Marvel films still holds up pretty well today. Well, for the most part. As I have stated before in another list, Blade’s opening scene is one of my personable favorites to any film. It is scary, gross, and sets the perfect tone for the rest of the film. Wesley Snipes was a perfect casting choice as Blade, and the rest of the casting was pretty solid as well. However, a mediocre ending, some laughably bad dialogue, and some silly concepts (vampires wearing sunscreen?!) hold Blade back form being as good as its sequel.

We’re Starting to Get Pretty Good Films Tier

20. The Punisher (2004)

I feel as if Thomas Jane’s Punisher movie is one of the more underrated gems in Marvel’s cinematic history. Jane had a really nice performance as the title hero as he captures both the vengeful vigilante and tragic hero complex of the comic book character. Many of the action scenes are tight, and the film contains several memorable scenes. (The ripping out piercings scene, for one) However, I feel like the film is almost holding back and playing it safe at points. Solid film, but definitely could have been one step greater.

19. The Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)

Age of Ultron is a film that almost lands with a thud, sort of like the city that fell from the sky. The Avengers sequel is a good film, but feels underwhelming. The great James Spader is never given enough to do as Ultron, the plot is almost too over the top, and it feels underwhelming compared to Cap 2, which came out a year prior. However, the cast chemistry makes the film fun to watch as you can see they are having a great time making it. All of the action scenes are well done as well. Also, giving Hawkeye a personality was nice touch.

18. Blade 2 (2002)

Blade’s second adventure on the big screen took the impressive fight scenes from the first film and gave it a better story to go along with it. Adding Guilermo Del Toro to the mix helped out the cause too. While the film is far from perfect due to some questionable plot twists, Blade 2 is an enjoyable in a unique way.

17. The Wolverine (2013)

The Wolverine’s story is pretty forgettable, but wow does it have some of the best action set pieces of the X-Men franchise. The setting is super cool, maybe it is because of my Japanese culture bias, but I love the atmosphere and locations in this one. Not much else to say. An entertaining watch even if other X-Men films are better than it. It is a Hell of a lot better than Origins at least. *shudders*

16. The Incredible Hulk (2008)

Wow, 2008 was a fantastic year for superhero movies. DC released The Dark Knight and Marvel had Iron Man. The Incredible Hulk got lost in the mix a bit, but the reboot of Bruce Banner’s rage monster was another thoroughly entertaining superhero film. The movie gets a little generic near the end with its giant monster CGI fight, but 2008′s Hulk is a pretty nice picture. This Hulk ALMOST makes me forget about Ang Lee’s atrocity.

15. X2: X-Men United (2003)

To many fans of the superhero genre, X2′s placement on this list may seem pretty low. Honestly, I have always felt that X2 was a bit overrated. However, that does not mean that X2 is not a great film. The story-telling is mostly tight, the characters’ motivations are realistic for the most part, and it utilizes flashbacks well. (a rare occasion) One of my grievances from the first film still remains in the sequel: Cyclops does absolutely nothing. Oh well, he gets killed in five minutes in the X3 anyway.

Exceptional Film-making Tier

14. DareDevil: Director’s Cut (2004)

Okay, now this could be borderline cheating. However, the director’s cut version of DareDevil is so much better than the theatrical cut that I had to put it on this list. The box for the Director’s Cut says the version adds a “Devilish new subplot”. I think it should just say it adds a plotline that connects everything and makes the film make a lot more sense. Matt doesn’t stay on the rooftop with Elektra, The Kingpin murders an employee of his to show how scary he can be, and the court plot receives nice depth. Coolio is actually pretty good in his role in this cut as well. This version still does not fix the asinine decision of not killing The Kingpin or erase the odd playground fight scene, but give this one a watch if you have not seen it.

13. X-Men: First Class (2011)

First Class stopped the bleeding from the last two awful X-Men films. Most importantly, it brought us Michael Fassbender’s fantastic version of Magneto. (James McAvoy’s solid Prof. X as well) The scene where Magneto forces the coin through his mother’s killer’s head is one of the best in the X-Men franchise, at least in my opinion. While First Class is a solid film, it still feels like a prologue for something to come. Also, it was “outclassed” by its sequel...

12. Ant-man (2015)

This high of a position may surprise people for Ant-man, but Ant-man is just too fun not to enjoy. Paul Rudd was a perfect cast for the title hero possessing the necessary humor and right amount of emotion to carry the role. The rest of the supporting cast of heroes is also really well cast anchored by a sterling performance by Michael Douglas. However, much like many other MCU films, the villain is just pretty meh. Just an evil bald guy with a similar suit to Ant-man.... sound similar to Iron Man at all?

11. Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

If one stops and thinks about it, Cap: The First Avengers plot is pretty average and extremely safe plotwise, but the Captain’s likability factor is so high that it carries the movie’s plot through a lot of its,,, shortfalls in originality. The First Avenger takes an old-fashioned film and gives it the perfect pinch of new age style to make it about a perfect blend. Evans’ Steve Rodgers and Hayley Atwell’s Peggy Carter also have top tier on screen chemistry, which makes the main couple of characters even more likable.

10. X-Men (2000)

With help from 2002′s Spider-man, X-Men was the major catalyst that kicked off the modern superhero era of film. Guess what? X-Men stands up pretty well today. There is good action, fun characterization, and a couple decent twists. Guess what else though? Cyclops does not do anything here either besides be an asshole to Logan. The directors really neglected his character for some reason.

CLASSSICS Tier

9. X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014)

After First Class dragged the X-Men films out of the pits of Hell, Days of Future Past took the franchise even deeper into its past’s glory. Get it? Past? Anyways, much of the stellar cast from the prior film return along with the best members of the original trilogy films.The end result is a film that combined the best of both time periods. Oh, and Quicksilver’s few minutes of screen time were amazing. Not much to knock here.

8. The Avengers (2012)

Thought this would be number one didn’t you? Well, some annoying plot holes and hype caused it to fall a little bit here. Those problems withstanding, The Avengers is terrific film that most comic book enthusiasts hoped for since childhood. All of the heroes finally group up and take on one of the worst baddies of all. In this case, it was Loki, by far the MCU’s best villain. Containing excellent scenes, such as the Hulk tossing Loki around in the room , and clever dialogue, The Avengers is just a pure fun film.

7. Spider-man (2002)

For a long time, this was my favorite film. Period. Nowadays, I still really love the film that kicked off my love for Marvel superheroes. Sam Raimi seems like an odd fit based on his past work looking back now, but it ended up being a solid match. To this day, Spidey is one of the better superhero origins story due to its mix of heart, humor, and fun. The Green Goblin is still one of the better Marvel movie villains. (even though I still do not understand why exactly Gobby hates Spidey so much after the halfway point of the film after accomplishing his original goal...). Even without the webshooters, Spider-man is a top tier Marvel film to this day.

6. Captain America: Civil War (2016)

After massive lead up and hype of one Marvel’s most famous story lines, Civil War delivered on most fronts. The main flaw was the plot relies on conveniences. While the villain’s plan is cool and different, it would NEVER have worked in retrospect. Besides over-critiquing, Civil War was pretty much all I wanted it to be: a battle royale between two balanced teams. (although Iron Man definitely had a strength advantage...) The airport scene, the Black Panther street chase, and the final fight are all some of the best in the MCU. Good job not letting us down here Marvel.

5. Guardians of Galaxy (2014)

The men and women behind the scenes at the MCU are geniuses. They took an almost unknown property and made it into a cultural phenomenon. GoG was a huge sleeper hit for Marvel and myself, admittedly. I did not really think much of it during the trailer phase, but after seeing the finished product, I was beyond pleased. Guardians of the Galaxy is high octane from beginning to end and is a blast to watch. I am eagerly awaiting to see the continuing adventures of Star Lord and crew this next week.

4. Deadpool (2016)

I dreaded a Deadpool movie being made. I read and read the comics during my high school years and fell in love with the character. After seeing the Ryan Reynold Origins version of the character, I was furious. Why would you sew his mouth shut?! Anyways, I was luckily wrong in my doomsday theories for a Deadpool film. In fact, it is exactly the type of Deadpool film I wanted. It had hilarious jokes and scenes, fourth wall-breaking, ultra-violence, and Ryan Reynolds’ absolutely nailed the character. Not much more I can say that has not been said.

3. Iron Man (2008)

I feel sorry for this film. It was completely overshadowed by The Dark Knight that came out a month later. What a lot of people forgot was that Iron Man was a fantastic film that broke the chain of mediocrity from Marvel the past few years before. Robert Downey Jr. revived his career even further by playing a character he was born to play. However, I believe the best part of the film was the way it combined realism of the current conflicts in the Middle East to the fantastical technology of Tony Stark. Obadiah Stone was a decent villain, even if he is sort of forgettable now because most MCU villains have been clones of his. Despite that, Iron Man is stellar.

2. Spider-man 2 (2004)

For a long time, up until The Dark Knight’s release to be more specific, Spider-man 2 was the best superhero film of all time. (in my opinion at least) However, one surpassed it in Marvel land a few years back. Spider-man 2 has all you want in a Spider-man movie. A terrific anti-villain, a well-written inner main character conflict where he has to choose between two paths, and a plot that makes sense almost the entire way through. The train scene and the reveal of the lair behind the mirror are still two of my favorite Marvel scenes to this date. Once again, not much more I can say. This movie still rocks.

1. Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)

A surprising choice to some people I bet to some people, The Winter Soldier is an almost perfect superhero film. Cap’s sequel is a fantastic film in about three genres I can think of, including spy thriller. Kind of reminds of a 60′s Bond film with A LOT better special effects. The plot of the film is modern and well thought up and avoids the common problem of being trendy with current event plot ideas. That is a bigger feat than most films of the kind can say. Besides the modern, appropriate and politically astute plot, the best parts of this film are the fight scenes. In the first Cap, he didn’t get to show off his fighting skills very much. But here, he kicks some major ass. Oh, and Black Widow does too, in what I believe to be her best movie as well. Add in Falcon for a flatout kickass trio. Overall, Cap 2 is fantastic from beginning to end and never lets up. Way to to go Marvel.

#marvel #mcu

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