can you explain in more detail why you think the PT weren't good friends for akiren? i'm not asking out of hate or to start drama, i just never interpreted things that way and i'm genuinely curious. i don't think them being brainwashed by maruki makes them "bad friends", but i don't know if that's what you meant either. i'd love to read a proper explanation on this that isn't just people arguing in the notes of that post.

Hi! Yeah, I know the ~discourse~ climate is pretty touchy and not a good place to exchange ideas, so I’ll do my best to put my thoughts on this matter into words. 

Settle in, bc this one is long.

I’ll start off by saying I don’t dislike the PT, nor do I think they’re bad people, and honestly I think they love Joker a lot! Ryuji calling Akira after his fake death and talking about how his ideas on what makes a hero have changed because of Akira genuinely makes me emotional, along with dozens of other scenes with the thieves! They’re good kids who could be really good friends to Akira but that’s not what’s shown in the game. I don’t think it’s controversial to say Akira’s relationships with all of his friends are transactional. That’s kind of the point, all of his confidants arise out of deals, give and take, and in the metanarrative of the game, that’s how it works. You as the player help these characters solve their problems, and through ranking their confidants up, you get access to more gameplay perks. So it’s pretty even!! But like,,Akira, the character, isn’t the player. There’s no in-story mechanic by which he can cash in friendship points for being-good-at-killing-things prizes. Yes, he uses those abilities to not die in the metaverse, but there is no literal, in-universe way to explain how hanging out with someone translates to [insert gameplay perk here]. So you have to look at what is physically happening in the story. Akira hangs out with the PT, stands there while they have drama with another irrelevant character, and then one way or another their problems get solved and they swear to be Akira’s blood brother or whatever. Akira is a crutch for these characters, and they say multiple times that they wouldn’t have been able to do what they did without him. So all of their shit gets handled and Akira gets?? Like actually gets?? What? Inquiries about his well-being? Offers to help him? Questions about his life, his interests? No,,,not really,, But he gets access to a super powerful persona!! Yay!!! Bc everyone knows he’s just a little shadow-killing machine, right? And even the relationships he does get something tangible (as in separate from the mechanics of the game) out of, like Kawakami’s, are built on the notion that if Akira stops providing for whatever reason, the relationship will end. So essentially, Akira is under the pressure of filling whatever role his friends need him in for however long at any time, and he’s been led to believe that if he stops or fails, he will stop receiving any reciprocal care and acceptance.

(And I know this is all gameplay stuff, I know it has to be like this to codify the complicated process of human relationships, I know all of that, I’m just trying to find a deeper layer bc that’s what I do.)

This whole thing comes into pretty clear focus for me during the third semester when you visit everyone in the false reality. Everyone is happy to see him, of course, but they’re clearly wrapped up in their own happiness. Which is understandable, again, I’m not saying the PT need to be attached to Akira to be good friends, but it all still feels off to me.

If they know Joker, then they’d know it’s weird that he just shows up and starts asking these pointed questions while they’re in the middle of something. All of their other interactions with him have been led by them. Yeah, Joker approaches them bc the player has decided to hang out with them, but the other character always chooses the activity and leads the discussion. Akira showing up out of nowhere and asking them to “remember” and “move on” and whatnot should be raising some major red flags. And it clearly does, since their memories do start to return, but they’re all too scared of losing their happiness that they nope out of the conversation as soon as possible, without stopping to consider why Joker might be trying to reach out to them like that. They’re his friends; they should know he wouldn’t just be trying to hurt them or make them unhappy. After all, their entire relationship with him up til that point has been exclusively about Joker trying to help them. This doesn’t make the PT bad people, running away is a totally natural reaction in that situation. They’re just kids, and their minds have been manipulated to a point, but it’s not like they don’t remember Joker or the way they’ve grown since meeting him. In fact many of them mention how much they’ve matured recently, but they never actually relate that back to Akira, despite him being the primary driving force behind most of their personal arcs, even though they definitely remember him. Translation vagueness or deliberate nod to the idea that the PT don’t actually credit Akira with all the hard work he did after their initial lip service? Hmmm. Anyway, their failure to recognize that Joker is struggling just demonstrates to me what was set up all throughout their confidant links, that their relationships are transactional and that they don’t necessarily consider Joker and his individual needs outside of what he provides for them. And when they no longer need him bc that hole has been filled, he simply doesn’t occupy the same place of importance in their lives. 

Makoto’s flashback in particular stood out to me, bc it was from a moment where she was specifically talking about feeling like she finally found a place to belong with the Phantom Thieves (and by extension, with Joker), but then she desperately tries to brush it off. Obviously that sense of belonging wasn’t meaningful enough to her for her to want it back. And I’m not blaming her, of course, any teenager would choose to have their father back over being in a vigilante group lmao, I just thought it was telling that the devs decided to show us a scene that was originally meant to be heartwarming as an example of the harsh reality Makoto wants to forget. All of the flashbacks are from defining moments for the thieves, but that one specifically got me like *thinking emoji*

So his friends are hesitant, despite the fact that they must know something is wrong. It’s understandable, they all stand to lose a lot if someone messes with the status quo. I genuinely don’t think I would react any differently. But there is someone who reacts differently and against his own self-interest. It’s Goro, the one who has arguably the most to lose, who doesn’t turn away from Akira. He seeks Akira out and teams up with him to uncover what’s really going on, even though he has every reason to believe that prodding too deep will literally mean the end of his life. He forces Akira and himself to face the truth because he knows anything else would just be an insult to what they’ve suffered so far. He’s the only one who never flinches, and that, more than any of his friends’ come-to-jesusing (which Akira still has to initiate) is what Akira needs in that situation. For the first time (outside of the brief instances in the tutorial levels), we see a situation where Akira is actually the dependent one, the one who needs help, who needs support. And the only one who has ever provided that, unconditionally, without demanding anything in return, is Goro. I could go into how Goro’s confidant blows all of the others out of the water in terms of building both himself AND Akira as characters, but it’s been said already and by smarter people than me. But basically, despite competition being a core theme of their relationship, Goro is the only character who is portrayed as Akira’s equal. Their contests are all in the name of improving not just Goro, but Akira too. Goro is the only character who expresses an interest in Akira’s inner life and development, and as such he knows Akira better than anyone else. So when Maruki tries to trap them all in a gilded birdcage, Goro won’t stand for it and he knows Akira won’t stand for it either. That’s why he’s so betrayed if you choose to accept the dreamworld. You’re negating the basis of your entire relationship with him and going against your own principles. Out of every character in the game, the one who knows Akira best and refuses to abandon him even when that could mean his own death is Goro Akechi.

I want to reiterate: I do not hate or even dislike the PT!! And tbh I don’t really think they “abandoned” Akira. That post, imo, is supposed to be kind of hyperbolic. Unless it’s referring to how many of them literally sprint away when he comes to talk to them lol. I look at it more like a commentary on how thoughtlessly the PT act as soon as their wishes are granted. I know it’s set up linearly for story purposes, but isn’t it kind of sad how no one checks up on Akira in the week he’s going around talking to people? Especially after he’s been acting so comparatively weird? It’s not unusual that they might be caught up in other stuff, but while you’re going around and visiting everyone, you don’t get a single text or call from ANY of the thieves, for a whole week!! Goro even comments on it directly with his pointed little “I’m sure you’re just as close as you were before” comment. God, he’s such a bitch. Ultimately, the PT do get their acts together, and it’s partially out of the realization that Akira is struggling alone against something and needs their help, which I love and appreciate. I think they are good friends who want to support Akira, but they can’t understand him past the role they’ve placed him in, and until they do, they’ll never be able to be what he needs. Akira loves his friends and knows he can rely on them in most ways, but those relationships will always be dogged by the pervasive fear that he must constantly earn the right to have the relationship at all. What he needs MOST is someone he doesn’t have to perform for, and from what we see in the game, none of the thieves fit that bill. Except Goro. 

I know this was long and rambly and probably pretty disjointed but I wanted to be as thorough as possible and all of my thoughts just sort of gushed out. Obviously ymmv about all of this depending on how you interpret the game, but this is what I arrived at thanks to my analysis so this is what I have for you! Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk

Hey! So I'm on my way to becoming a hanzo main. I love him to death. But it's so disheartening because whenever I join a game and choose him my team are like... no >:[ and I get so much abuse it's even worse because I'm a girl and when I start trying to defend myself they either just stop talking altogether (like why tho I'm not scary?) or the insults just get worse. It's really turning me away from ranked :/ is it just a hanzo thing or a girl thing or both argh I'm so stressed. I just wana play

I’m so sorry to hear you are having to deal with these kinds of toxic arseholes. Sadly, I know exactly what it’s like to be called out for the characters I play or because of the fact that I’m a girl. So, because this is an issue that is very dear to my heart, I will respond to this with a wall of text. Beware!

Let me start off by saying this.

Never, ever, ever, ever let sexist behaviour stop you from enjoying the games you play.

Under no circumstances let them stop you from using the features of the game you want to use, just because you are of a certain gender or you sound a certain way. Keep playing. Keep your head high. It will get better eventually - if they keep hearing women, if they keep seeing women in their games - we will have a future in gaming where women are an unquestioned part of. Please, never stop doing what you love in gaming because of sexist behaviour. Sometimes, it will be hard when you encounter vile people that are determined to ruin your day - you are allowed to be upset, but do not let it stop you from enjoying the game.

You are allowed to play your game. There’s girls out there playing the game you are playing now. In a lot of cases, you paid good money to play the game you want to play. You are allowed to play it the way you want to, just like they do. Your gender does not make you worse.

About encountering sexismEven if it might feel like your reports do not make a difference: please, please report EVERY. SINGLE. ARSEHOLE. you come across and clearly state in the report that they are showcasing sexist behaviour if this is the case. I contacted Blizzard support a while ago because of a very vile player that threatened to find my IP address (which is impossible - Blizzard support ensured me), find my house and come there to rape, beat and ddos me. If people, be it in Overwatch or any other Blizzard game, are threatening you about harming you in real life, you are allowed to make a seperate report via the Support section on the Blizzard website. This will bring you in contact with a Game Master that you can correspond with and that will manually ban a player for you if necessary. The person from Blizzard Support that I had contact with was very adamant in letting me know that reports do help, and they do try their hardest to punish players for their behaviours.

So, with that out of the way: a lot of people will tell you to just mute and block the person that is being toxic towards you, but I do not think that solves the problem, at all - nor does it make you feel better. I will be honest and say that I have always gone against the person that insulted me for being a girl and turned it into a toxic back-and-forth of insults, often to the point of the person in question resulting to throwing the game because I was too quick to shot their toxic behaviour down with remarks. When people start insulting you for whatever reason, especially just because of sexist behaviour, I advise you to do one of 2 things:

1. If it makes you feel better, make a snide remark back, but do not make my mistakes and continue the conversation if it escalates. Because I know it can be very hard to come up with something witty the second something is happening, here is a tiny list of some of the things I have said to arseholes:

Sometimes they will mistake you for a so-called ‘squaker’, also known as a young boy that hasn’t grown into his adult voice yet (NOTE: there is absolutely nothing wrong with being young and playing games, however some people will be very hostile towards any young-sounding people). “Wow, shut the hell up, stupid kid.” to which I always respond, “Oh, you don’t know what an actual real life woman talking sounds like? Figures.”

“LOL you sound like one of those triggered feminists” > “I don’t know, the only one that seems pretty ‘triggered’ about there being a girl in-game is you” or “I thought that Reddit meme was declared unfunny months ago” or “Nice joke, did you find that one on the internet yourself?”

“Why do all girls play Mercy/Support/D.Va?” > “Why do all arseholes play [insert their character here]?”

“Girls can’t play” / “Oh, it’s a girl, we’re going to lose” / “No wonder we’re losing, we have a chick on the team” > “Oh, is that why we are losing? I mistook you for some guy that can’t play all along”

And the famous ones “Get back into the kitchen” / “Suck my dick” / “Make me a sandwich” > “Please let me know when you find some original insults” or “Nice. I think 2005 called and it wants it insult back”

What also often helps when all else fails is to just burst into obnoxious loud laughter, even if you don’t think it’s funny. It will make them feel ridiculed and have them shut up, even if it’s for a few seconds

However, never let the situation escalate to the point where you lose your focus on the game. After making a remark, drop the issue and report them. If they continue insulting, mute them - and tell your team you did so. “Alright, this guy is muted, let me know if he says something useful (like callouts, warnings, ult charge, et cetera)”. I know it’s very hard, and if you are anything like me, you will get very upset and angry (especially if you have been through this many times before), because it is not fair. It’s not fair that you have to justify being a girl, or choosing a type of hero just because some arsehole decided to comment on it. However, your wellbeing is a priority. If you need to turn off voice chat, if you need to leave the chat or disable it - do it.

2. Completely ignore them, but stay active in chat and voice. Act like they do not even exist. The second they start talking to you, making insults, trying to provoke you - either mute them, or just completely ignore them. Instead, try to still be active in voice chat and make helpful callouts, let people know there’s a flanking Genji, tell them about your ult progress, et cetera. Nothing is more infuriating to someone like that to be ignored and then still having their ‘victim’ enjoy the game.

Never hesitate to leave voice chat, team chat or match chat if you need to. Do not be scared to use this feature if you are bothered by what is happening. It can be a breath of fresh air to just play the game without having to worry about people commenting on you or on your performance.

About encountering hate for playing a certain characterIn the case of Quick Play and Arcade: simply said, fuck ‘em. QP and Arcade are there for you to have fun in and try out new heroes and strategies, to just relax with your favourite hero, and to have fun. If people start complaining about your choice of hero - mute, immediately. It doesn’t matter if you win or lose in QP or Arcade. You don’t need their help - you are there to have fun.

However, Competitive is about winning games. Even though I encourage you to play heroes you are comfortable with or you want to play, try to see what is fitting for your team and switch your hero if it is not working out. ‘Maining’ a hero is a good think, being a ‘onetrick’ is not! (meaning: if there is a main hero you are best with, that’s great - but if it’s the ONLY character you can play, that poses a problem for your team)

That does not mean you let yourself be bullied into switching a character, even in Competitive. As soon as things start going bad for your team, a lot of people will have the tendency to blame the ‘weak link’ of the team - aka the person they think is contributing the least, which is often the hero pick they do not agree with. Hanzo, Sombra, Widowmaker, and plenty of other heroes are good examples of that. However, just because people are playing the blame game and have decided that you, as a Hanzo, are not doing well, does not mean you immediately have to switch. In a lot of cases, you might not even be at ‘fault’ for your team not doing well. Try to keep a clear head and assess the situation to see if there’s something YOU can do to make a difference. Are you doing enough for your team? Are you getting kills? Are you staying alive well enough? Are you getting enough damage in? Are you not dying constantly?

If you are fond of playing a hero a lot of people deem ‘unfit’ or ‘not meta’ and you know some people are going to have an issue with it, just communicate. When starting a match, just say something in chat like: “hey guys! I am a Hanzo player, it’s the character I’m most comfortable with and I can do well with him. If it’s not working out, I will switch, don’t worry! I can play [characters you are able to play], as well.” In some cases, you might have to compromise and play a different hero. That’s okay! Competitive is about winning - but do not play heroes you are not comfortable with. My advice is to learn 1 or 2 heroes in every category - so at least 1-2 tanks, 1-2 supports and 1-2 DPS you are good with. When starting a match, just feel free to pick the hero you want to play and communicate with your team with what you guys need to get a good composition going.

Please do not be discouraged by people being rude. Ranked is very hard in that matter that people are very scared of losing their precious SR and do not want to lose. Therefore, toxicity is higher there. Partly, Blizzard is at fault here for not enforcing a stricter banning and reporting system, but if we are to believe what they are telling us, that is getting fixed, soon.

I myself am taking a break from Ranked play for the moment. I was close to hitting Grandmaster, but my own frustration plus toxicity has ruined the experience for me for the time being. Sometimes all you need is a step back for some perspective.

Please just have fun and try to focus on your own personal addittion to your team. Even if you lose, you will know you did well in the end and helped your team in the best way you could have.

I hope my giant rant can help you and others somewhat. Sorry if it comes across sort of rambly, but I have a lot of feelings about sexism in games, haha. You do you and play the game the way you want to! ♥