ranking every recent spidey movie because i am biased and contain opinions

spider-man (2002). this movie is pretty funny and dafoe (best part of the movie) kills it as green goblin. however it also aged badly with the special effects and Not Great Writing of the female characters™. tobey is great but i think he shines more in the later movies (which i will get to). it does a great job of setting up the characters and universe but it's also the most basic of the raimi trilogy imo. because while this is pretty cohesive narrative-wise it's still less enjoyable to me than the others (doesn't mean it's bad, just that it gets better from here). 6.5/10

spider-man 2 (2004). i think this is objectively the best live action spidey movie (even if i personally like 3 better). doc ock is my fav live action spidey villain and the fight scenes in this movie are just. iconic. the train scene obviously deserves every bit of the hype it gets. also this movie leans hard into my favorite spidey trope which is "peter struggles to balance his superhero life and civilian life" and i really love the plot point about peter's powers not working bc of the stress coming out of it. and the raindrops keep falling on my head montage is cinema tm. loses points for the very bad depiction of mj but this is rly the only problem i have with it. 8/10

spider-man 3 (2007). this movie has the biggest "over the top soap opera comic" vibes and god do i LOVE it. the plot is all over the place and it's clearly struggling to juggle the three villains but also i had so much fun watching it so it does not matter. this movie has my two fav scenes in the Entire raimi trilogy which are a) emo peter doing his stupid little walk and b) emo peter doing his stupid little dance. emo peter my beloved. you'll forever be in my heart and i'll never get tired of the memes about you. anyway it makes me a little sad that spidey movies from here on will be afraid to be this cheesy and stupid. 8.5/10

the amazing spider-man (2012). andrew is a great spidey you all were just mean. i like how the movie leans into him having to get used to his powers and the bit at the end where peter brings home the eggs to may was super heartwarming. there are writing decisions i have issues with most notably peter getting his start as spidey by hunting down any long haired blonde guy and how this plot point gets dropped without getting resolved (so the "responsibility" element is kinda missing from the origin to me). BUT skaterman peter is extremely lovable so i'll forgive him. also the lizard is such a hilarious villain. 7/10

the amazing spider-man 2 (2014). ok so i tried really hard to like this movie but. well. lmao. i will say that peter's suit/the overall visual effects look great and i think andrew's performance is the best part of the movie. and that part where electro's theme (?) plays in time when he destroys things is neat. everything else is just. a mess. enough criticism has been thrown at this movie so im not gonna delve into it but i do want to say that i really wish the tasm movies were written better bc there's so much potential in the characters/universe but the writing brings it down for me. 5/10

spider-man: homecoming (2017). i still love this movie i know it makes me a fake spidey enjoyer but still. it's adorable. it's part of what got me rly into marvel and it has a special place in my heart. hoco is not trying to be an origin story it's like this comedy hs movie w spidey elements and also works kinda as a sequel to an unseen origin and i like that (bc we have already seen the origin 2 other times). extra points for being the funniest depiction of high school and having my fav soundtrack out of the rest of the live action movies. However there are still definite sins committed adaptation wise that carry over to the rest of the mcu trilogy and they sting very hard rewatching this movie now. 7.5/10

spider-man: into the spider-verse (2018). cinematic masterpiece and the best superhero movie of all time i am sure that everyone with a brain can agree with me on this. every frame of this movie is so beautiful and it captures the comic book vibe so well. it's a love letter to spider-man as a character and you can tell how much passion was put into it. there are about 5 scenes in this movie that still make me tear up even though ive rewatched it so many times. miles my son . [peter b voice] i LOVE YOU i am SO PROUD OF YOU. beautiful soundtrack and animation, amazing action, top notch voice acting, it truly has Everything. i think the only spidey movies that will have a chance of being as good as this movie are its sequels. 1000/10

spider-man: far from home (2019). i hate this movie and every connection it makes with tony stark. this is because i love tony stark so much hes my favorite guy ever and this movie feels like slander towards him. way back on my sideblog i ranted about how besides the fact that peter isnt a legacy hero it fails at cementing him as a legacy in the first place, But Also this all gets immediately retracted in no way home so whats the entire point anyways. mj and peter are cute but are they worth it for the tony slander. no. i cant have normal opinions about this movie i'm sorry. 3/10.

spider-man: no way home (2021). i know. i know. everyone likes this movie. there's generally a lot to like, from the villains to the action to the previous spideys to the dynamic between the main trio. however i wish that this trilogy had not gone in this direction at all. there are lots of writing choices i super disagree with, the biggest one being may dying because a) the mcu cant stopping killing its important female characters and b) it retcons the previous implication that ben existed and had a hand in peter's origin. also i don't like the ending lmao. to me it feels like every individual mcu spidey movie shoots itself in the foot and makes it increasingly harder to build upon story-wise. 5/10