INKTOBER 27 - Imp, Elden Ring
These creatures created by satan are a headache in Elden Ring.
One is not a problem, two are bearable, three are already problems, but five or more prepare for the screen to appear "YOU DIED" and worst of all, these unfortunates attack in small spaces in the catacombs.
The "Oh Shit!" section tradition in the month of INKTOBER is dedicated to the Imp, because they have given me tragicomic situations in ER.
Eme
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Case: The Stormfoot Catacombs
From the Church of Elleh I spotted a strange figure on a nearby hill
When I got closer, I realized it was just a freaky statue. But when I touched it, it started projecting a light in a straight line.
Pulling out my trusty telescope, courtesy of Kalé, I was able to spot a small door in the nearby cliff.
When I got closer, I found a bunch of nobles digging around near what I at first identified as gravestones. Closer examination made me doubt that. I noticed the weird way they stacked on top of each other. Made me think of crystals, how they make regular shapes but the shapes just pile up. Couldn't read the runes, but I did notice that only the "carved" rocks have this golden lichen on them. I can't imagine anyone actually carving these shapes, so I'm just gonna chalk this up to "one of those things."
At any rate, I found the door and went into the catacombs, only to be greeted by a ghost in a chair.
He told me that true death means returning to the roots of the Erdtree, and I shouldn't be so hasty. Now, ghosts this thin aren't typically good conversationalists. They generally have one thing only to say, so anyone who walked into this catacomb might get the same lecture.
On closer examination though, I noticed the ghost was one of the long-necks. It's hard to make out on its hazy form, but it appeared to have a large block of some kind hanging from its neck. Guess that explains the depressed shoulders and extended neck. Like a garden vegetable growing under a fence post.
The catacomb itself was crawling with these fucking godsdamn gargoyle imps. They were fast, they were tough, and they hit like a truck. I'm not too proud to say, I died several times and had to retreat several more. They love to attack from weird angles, clinging to walls or lurking around blind corners. I'm more situationally aware than most, and for every ambush I anticipated, I'd miss two and end up in a fight for my life.
In the first room I found a dead noble with some root resin on him, which the voice helpfully informed me came from the roots of the Greattree, which once connected to the Erdtree. So if I interpret that right, whatever roots are down here no longer connect to that big shiny tree outside.
Bit further in, behind a flame trap, I found another noble with a strange toy whistle that sounds like a deep voice saying "hello."
"one of those things"
Speaking of flame, something occurred to me. I hadn't really thought much about it in the tomb I started in, but coming in here with a torch and seeing the flame from the trap made me realize something's strange about the flame here. Can't say I've ever seen white flame before, and bringing my hand near just made it colder. I couldn't find a way to douse it, otherwise I would've sampled the dark sludge fueling the flame.
Found yet another dead noble, this one clutching a burning butterfly. Not the first time I've found one of them, but the way he clutched it, like it was somehow precious to him. As for me, I was finally able to put Kalé's crafting kit to work and created a fire pot with that strange regenerating jar.
At the top of the catacomb, I found one last dead noble. At least, that's what I thought. Slumped against a large stone sarcophagus, he held in his hands a box of ashes. Ashes of other nobles. I'm really starting to notice a theme here.
Finally, I opened the way into the main chamber of the catacomb. There I found a creature that the voice called a "Burial Watchdog" but looked more like a cross between a cat and a monkey.
Seemed to be of the same construction as the stone imps, and just as much of a bastard. When it died, I found another spirit ash, this one holding the soul of a noble sorcerer who failed to achieve much at a place called Raya Lucaria academy.
Interesting name. An old name, that tickles the back of my brain. I've heard it before somewhere. Not here, but back in my old life, whatever that was. I'll see if I can jog my memory.
With the guardian dispatched, I got a good look at what it was guarding for the first time
Gods. I don't know what I was expecting when the spirit said "Erdtree burial" but it certainly wasn't this. Not to be culturally insensitive but how the hell can anyone think this is okay? Add a little fire and this is what I always thought Hell would look like. Maybe it wouldn't look so bad if the roots weren't cut off from the main tree, but as it stands, I had to turn away and retch.
Conclusion: The wandering nobles were searching for a place to die. They found it alright, but not how they hoped. The guardians made easy work of them, and they were ultimately denied even the grotesque burial they were hoping for. Only one of them made it through to the main chamber, where he gained the honor of being burned to ash by the Watchdog. A miserable end no matter how you slice it.
Some lingering questions:
Are all the nobles searching for death?
What's with the pale, cold flame?
What is the Greattree?
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