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paigenoelchas-blog · 10 months

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Feels Like Home

34: Bonding

Jake's POV:

Philip walks in, patting me on the back in a good-natured way. It is odd seeing him this way. He and I are involved in an activity without the girls and I am actually excited about it. He strides into the room with a confident swagger. "I wondered why you lived so far out here in the woods, but this cabin is great. It will be the perfect place to take all of your cash from you." Phil taunts me and then nods with a crooked smile. He surveys the cabin further and then walks to the refrigerator, opens it, and grabs both of us a beer. I am unexpectedly satisfied that he makes himself feel at home here.

He shares Betty's attitude of owning whatever room he is in and it puts me at ease. They have been good for each other and as much as I wish to hold on to my antagonism toward him, I am having a difficult time finding reasons to do so. I am finding it hard to pretend that we don't have a bit of a real friendship going. Tonight, I am thankful for Phillip and his presence here. I will never admit that he can be a comfort to me, standing in proxy for Betty.

I let out a sigh, releasing some of the tension I have been holding onto. Asking the boys over for poker may seem like a little thing, but I have never entertained anyone before. I am still new to being around others in public, though I have been doing more of that with Mari's help. My nerves are still on edge because Thomas is coming tonight. This is a big step and I need to take it.

Daniel follows quickly behind, offering his signature whiskey. "Thought that you boys might like this. I can't have it, but there is no reason that you shouldn't." He doesn't drink anymore after the incident at the bar. It was a promise that he made to Jessy and he isn't going to do anything to screw up the best thing in his life. I admire his ability to change and rid himself of his demons. I admire the loyalty that he shows to all of us that he cares for. Since the day that he apologized, he has done nothing but prove to me that he is a friend and worthy of being called such.

It makes me think of the three of us, all men with demons. Men that were lost and stagnant, trapped by their own poor choices. A good woman can make you do all sorts of crazy things. The love of an excellent woman makes you want to be better and changes every aspect of your life. We have all changed and softened. We have all become more than what everyone expected us to be. The three of us have excellent women in our lives and are smart enough to hold on to them tight. I hope that they will hold onto the three of us just as tight.

"I was going to ask if you had actually played poker before since you don't seem the type for a regular poker night, but you have the table and the set up so I assume you know what you are doing," Daniel says. "Thanks for the invite. This is going to be fun. We need a night without the girls."

I am not going to tell him that I have never played against real people. All of my poker skills have come from late-night insomnia on the computer. I won't tell him that I bought all of this stuff this afternoon, right after I invited them over. Let him be intimidated.

"I think the girls need a night without you two," Phillip interjects. "They must be exhausted from dealing with your sorry asses all day."

I nod in mock agreement. There is a certain amount of truth in his words. I know he isn't serious, but I will never take it for granted that Mahri chose me. I know that I do not deserve her or her love.

Daniel retorts, "Aww, Phil, don't be jealous that we don't let our women push us around. You are like a puppy at Betty's feet."

"I admit," Phillip retorts, chugging the last of his beer, "She is bossy. but I like it that way. I mean, she has some really good ideas and is not afraid to try inventive things in bed..."

"No." I interrupt. "No bedroom talk about my best friend. Please."

Phil laughs, "Ok, ok. I can try to keep those thoughts to myself, but she is something special. The first woman that has kept me interested and satisfied." He sits at the table leaning back. A smile crosses his face as if he is remembering some of their good times. He is satisfied that he has gotten under my skin a bit. It doesn't bother me like it used to. I know where I stand.

"How did you two manage to bury the hatchet? You two are friends now?" Daniel asks, truly curious.

We both reluctantly nod and respond at the same time. "Betty." A smile crosses my face and I realize that she has given me another great gift. I see the same thing on his face.

"Weird," Daniel grumbles as he finds a spot on the couch. We are, of course, waiting for Thomas. "What should we discuss while we wait?" Phillip ponders. "Oh, I know, Jake, what are your thoughts on motorcycles? Would you ever want one?"

Daniel shoots Phillip a glance that I don't understand.

"I would love to have one to take Mahri for rides on. I like the thought of the freedom that it brings," I answer. I also love the thought of her arms wrapped around me so tightly and the wind blowing her delicious smell into my space. I love the idea of going on a drive, eating lunch in some beautiful spot, making love somewhere private and exciting.

"No talk of bedroom activities with one of my best friends," Phillip teases with a sideways smile. I roll my eyes.

"Woah dude," Daniel interrupts my thoughts. "You zoned out really fast."

Phillip prods, " He was thinking about all of the things he wanted to do with and to Mahri on that bike. Let him be. He is in LOooOooove."

I blush despite myself. "Don't pretend that you haven't thought of something irreverent that you would do with Betty if you had a bike,"

"Guilty," he responds, "but you don't want to hear about that." He smirks.

"I do not want to hear anything about you and Betty being irreverent," I respond with a smile.

There is a long pause and Danie shakes his head, "You two being friends is going to take some getting used to, but I think I like it. As long as I learn how to keep up.

_________________

Mahri's POV:

Since Phil is off tonight, Joe is tending the bar. Joe is an older man in his fifties. His salt and pepper hair is the only thing that belies his age. He is still quite handsome and has many lady callers. To top it off, he is quite charming and draws people into the room. He is a great asset to have behind the bar. He is a trusted employee having worked at the bar before Phil owned the place and has been an excellent friend to both Phil and Betty. In fact, Phil often introduces him as his brother.

Tonight, he has been instructed to "give the girls whatever they want and make sure they are safe." He has also been told to call Phil before the cops if Betty "gets mouthy." It isn't that she gets in trouble often or that she likes to pick a fight, but she won't let anyone mess with her friends.

Betty and I arrive before the rest of the ladies. She wants to secure a table in the back that allows us a space to have fun but is a little quieter and away from the pick-up lines and skeezy men trying to find a girl to take advantage of. Girls' nights are fun, but these days, you have to be careful.

It is pretty early so the bar is fairly empty. A couple of old-timers are having their nightly beer and enjoying the company. They will be home and probably in bed before most of the younger people show up.

Slowly, the men in business suits flow in and out, having a quick drink before returning home to their wives and kids. Joe greets all of the clients by name, making them feel welcome in their home away from home.

"Joe," Betty greets him excitedly as she walks behind the bar and gives him a quick hug. She also greets the two men sitting at the counter. "Hey, Bill, Spenser." The two men smile back seemingly charmed by her, like we all are. The other men nod and go back to their drink, sucking down peanuts at the counter.

"No patrons behind the bar, Char." Joe jokes, using her name chosen for the new people in her life. I still feel lucky that I get to call her Betty.

"What are going to do, kick me out?" She quips and gives him a wink. "I know the boss."

"I may have to call the boss about an unruly woman that insists on breaking the rules." He pokes her in the ear as a brother would.

"The boss likes it when I break all of the rules," Betty fires back and swats his arm away.

"That's the truth," Joe concedes. "But seriously, Betty what would you like to drink? I can get it for you. I am under strict orders to give you whatever you want, remember?"

Betty's devilish grin appears. "I do love dating the bar owner. If that is the case, let me consult my friend over here. Joe, you remember Mahri?" She asks, pointing in my direction. I have taken a seat in front of the bar. Joe nods and winks at me, "How could I forget such a lovely friend?" Despite it all, I blushed.

"Em," Betty directs the question at me. Lately, she has taken to calling me Em. I like it. "You and I are starting out with two shots, Whiskey or tequila? Your choice." Betty is going to get me into trouble if I don't have a plan. Tonight can be a lot of fun, but there will be consequences tomorrow and I am still trying to sneak out to Jake's cabin later.

"Whiskey," I say and then change the subject. "Should we get the others a drink? They should be here soon."

"Yes," Betty says as Joe slams the shots on the bar. She raises her glass and toasts, "To fun and friends and to Phil for owning this place." Our glasses clink, and we down our shots.

I instantly regret not eating dinner. It is ok, Cleo will bring snacks. She is always so thoughtful.

"I know that Jessy will want an espresso martini, but what do the other girls want? I haven't met them yet." Betty asked.

She had become such a big part of my life, I had forgotten that she hadn't been introduced to the sisters or Cleo yet. I would be anxious. She appears to be unphased.

Betty interlinks our arms as we walk back to our table. "I am very glad to meet these other people in your life. I have heard so much about them."

"They are excited to meet you too. I hope they behave. Sometimes Lily can be prickly."

"So can I when challenged." She speaks with such confidence, though I am not surprised. My head begins to swim at the thought of the drama that could ensue. The two shots may have been a bad idea.

I text the group to tell them where we are. and look up to see Cleo and Jessy entering the bar. Jessy runs up to hug me. She is in a cute form-fitting emerald dress and as usual, she looks like an angel. Her red hair is flowing down her back. Her hug threatens to cut off my air supply. She turns to Betty and hugs her just as tightly. I love that the two of them are so close.

Cleo is balancing a huge purse and a plate of cupcakes. She is adorable, her glasses sit on the edge of her nose. Her dress is red and slightly out of fashion, but on her, it works somehow. She begins to set up a buffet of sweets on the table. It is amazing what she can accomplish. Cleo works a demanding job at the library and bakes all of these delicacies. She also volunteers to help her mom out at the church and helps run the local animal shelter. We all should be a little more like Cleo, I think. She places the dessert on the table and reaches out to shake Betty's hand. "Nice to meet you. You must be Betty. I have heard wonderful things about you."

"Wonderful? I am not sure that you are talking about me, but it is nice to meet you too. A friend of Em's is a friend of mine. I do like to go by Charlotte or Char, please. Betty is a name I used in a former life."

Cleo nods and smiles. "Of course, Char. I think we will be good friends."

"Me too," Betty responds eyeing the desserts on the table. "Especially if you keep bringing such beautiful dessert."

Cleo blushes. She is not used to overt flattery from a stranger.

"So, what do you have there?" Betty asks pointing at the cupcakes.

"Churro cupcakes with a caramel sauce," Cleo responds and pulls plates out of her bag.

"You may be my favorite friend so far." Betty smiles at Cleo and places her hand on her shoulder in a friendly gesture.

I love watching Betty interact with others. She somehow manages to charm everyone and stay true to herself.

The drinks arrive and Jessy and Cleo are relaxed and slightly tipsy when the sisters walk in.

"Sorry, we got a head start," Cleo apologizes as Hannah sits down next to her and pushes her drink towards her. Hannah is lovely. I haven't spent much time with her since Jake returned, but we were becoming quite good friends before that. She is shy, but she would do anything for a friend.

Lily on the other hand only appreciated my help when we were looking for Hannah. She has never liked me, She knows that Jake loves me, but she doesn't trust me. The feeling is mutual. We have a truce for the sake of all of the others, but I believe that she would still throw me under the bus if given the opportunity. I don't know how her distrust will fare when Jake talks to his sisters. I will have to get along with Lily then. I will, I just hope that someday she can find a way to do the same.

I watch these ladies sharing the room with me. We are all so different, but we have made the choice to care for and support each other. I raise my glass and begin my toast, "To all of these wonderful women here tonight that have made me feel accepted and have allowed me into their world, I am so thankful for you."

Jessy adds, "And to Mahri for bringing us all together and saving Hannah, of course."

Lily rolls her eyes quickly, but to her credit, she toasts right alongside everyone else.

We return to chatting and drinking and eating the delicious desserts that Cleo made. Hannah is laughing at one of Betty's stories about Jake. Lily seems unimpressed, but she is polite. I am actually impressed with her behavior. I think Betty intimidates her a bit.

We are having a great time gossiping and drinking. The laughter fills the air and the drinks continue to flow. After a while, Jessy sits next to me and holds my hand in a sisterly gesture. Her smile is genuine and kind.

"She really is something isn't she?" Jessy whispered, speaking of Betty, of course.

"Yes, " I respond and smile, thankful for the addition of her to my friend group. I can't imagine where Jake and I would be without her influence and support.

I watch as the girls that I care for the most, celebrate with each other. I love watching these very different women work their way into each other lives. Then I watch the woman next to me holding my hand. I may have lost a sister when Elle died, but I gained one the day that I met Jessy. She returned some of the optimism and joy that had been lost in the death of my twin.

I squeeze her hand and lean into her ear to whisper, "You are really something too, you know. Thank you for being my sister."

She turns around and hugs me. I notice a tear in her eye.

I don't know if it is the alcohol or just the warmth of this moment, I don't know if it is the way that my heart has awakened since I have learned to love and trust Jake more, but I feel full and happy and thankful for the life I get to live.

I watch as Betty tells the story of Jake's first crush. She looks at me and winks, letting me know that we are in this together. I smile back, slightly dizzy, definitely drunk, and filled with a sense of family like I have never known.

_______

Jake's POV:

Thomas arrived late. He was unapologetic and a little grouchy. This did not bode well for our relationship or for the evening. When I opened the door for him, he barely made eye contact with me.

"Let's get going on this game, guys." He says, walking across the room and, taking the beer out of Phillip's hand, he swallows it down in one gulp.

Philip makes an aggravated gesture. "What's going on with you?"

Thomas is incredulous as if he doesn't realize what he has done wrong. "Nothing. I was just thirsty."

"And rude," Philip responds. The fire in his eyes is unmistakable.

Daniel, trying to chill the atmosphere before things get out of control, brings a new beer to Phillip and pats him on the shoulder, directing the conversation to the game, "Thomas is finally here. I am anxious to show you all a thing or two about poker." He directs all of us to the table.

I take a deep breath as Philip moves to the table. I can tell that he is seething, but am impressed at his ability to control his words. He puts his arm on my shoulder and smiles sideways.

Daniel takes the deck and deals the cards to us. I start out with a terrible hand, but I know that poker is more about the way you play the game than it is about the cards you are dealt. I mock confidence and raise the stakes. Phillip and Daniel fold. It is left to Thomas to see where the rest of the game goes. Thomas tries to eyeball me. He thinks he can intimidate me into giving away my secret of a terrible hand, but he is not that smart or that intimidating. He calls and I raise, he raises and I do. The stakes are quite high since this is still the beginning of the evening.

Thomas watches me again. I can see the distrust in his eyes. I can't blame him. I am lying about this hand, but his distrust extends outside of the game. He has no reason to mistrust me in that area. It is his turn and he has been quiet for a few minutes.

"What's your move?" Daniel asks Thomas directly, trying to break the tension in the room.

"I don't trust anything out of this man, so I think he is lying about his hand, but he helped save Hannah so I have to give him the benefit of the doubt." He is being honest, too honest if I admit the truth.

"So, what is it then?" Phillip asks. "Play the game or continue to make unnecessary comments to your host?"

Thomas is unphased by Phillip's condemnation but decides to fold. He throws the cards in the middle of the table, releasing some aggression. He had a flush. He would have beaten me without question.

I show my cards. A pair of ones.

Thomas becomes irate as I gather my chips. I had just gained $75. That is not a lot of money, but the loss was a blow to his ego.

"I knew that you couldn't be trusted. I won't make that mistake again." Thomas grumbles.

Daniel enters in this time. "Thomas, it is poker, he played the game and he did it well. You need to fix your attitude."

What attitude?" Thomas asks.

"The one that you have had since you walked in here," Phillip interjects.

Daniel holds up his hand to stop Philip. He takes Thomas by the arm and pulls him aside. "What is going on, man?" His voice is low and calm.

"I don't want to be here. I don't want to play games with him, learn from him. I only came because Hannah thought it was a good idea. I don't like him and I certainly don't trust him." Thomas is getting mad, his words are becoming loud and aggressive. They actually sting.

Probably because I feel the same way toward him. I simply have a reason for my feelings on the matter.

I walk up to Thomas and in a firm voice insist that we talk this through. He agrees. I invite him to have a seat at the table.

He gruffs off toward the kitchen. "I will stand if you don't mind." He is going to be obstinate and do nothing to help fix this situation in a civilized manner. My sister could do better, but she loves him. I owe it to her to try and fix this.

"Ok," I begin, "I understand you don't like me much. I also understand I am not everyone's cup of tea, but what are your grievances?"

He huffs, "That is a grievance. You use big words to act superior to all of us and act as though you are above the law."

"I use big words for other reasons. I do not think I am better than anyone. I have regrettably done things in the past that were against the law, but I have turned away from that life."

"Maybe, but when we were looking for Hannah, you and Mahri kept a lot of things hidden from us, things that could have helped us find her." Thomas is trying to control his words and his temper.

"The fact that we kept things from you is one of the reasons that we found her," I respond.

"You can say that, but I don't believe you." He is being honest and I have to respect that.

"I can not force you to accept the truth. We will have to come up with an understanding on this for everyone's sake."

"I understand just fine. I don't trust you." He leans against the counter, his arms folded across his chest. "This is a waste of time. You and Mahri are not worth my time or anyone else's. You offer nothing to this group of friends and we don't want you around."

Phillip pipes in, "You are on your own here. I find the two of them to be a wonderful addition to our group."

"You would, Convict. Dan gets it. He hates you as much as I do." Daniel shook his head, but Thomas didn't notice, "He sees the way you two have all of these ideas and are willing to put yourselves above everyone else."

"Everything we did was to find Hannah. We put ourselves in danger for her and for all of you. Do you not remember how hard we tried to keep you all safe?" I asked. Do you not remember how many nights we went without sleep and in fear in order to bring her home?"

"I remember how Mahri wouldn't go and meet the MWAF when that is what needed to be done. She could have saved Richy."

That was it. I am seething. All of the feelings from that night rush back into my heart. All of the anger that I felt when he was willing to sacrifice Mahri's life came right back to me.

Trying to control my anger, I pause and forcefully add, "You do not get to talk about Mahri anymore. You don't have the right to utter her name from your filthy lips. You were willing to sacrifice her in order to save Hannah. You played on her compassion and you were manipulative. You cared nothing for her then and you don't have the right to be in her life now." I stand up and walk toward him, the counter is the only thing between us. My eyes glare into his with unrelenting command.

"What do you mean I don't have the right? I can talk about whoever I want. I can do whatever I want. Mahri is just as selfish as you are. She should go back to wherever it was before she came here." Thomas is spitting the words out and meeting my anger.

"You are right, " I speak through my gritted teeth. "You can speak of whoever you want but if you malign her name one more time in my presence, there will be consequences. Do you understand?"

"OoOoh" Thomas mocks me holding up wiggling fingers, "Consequences, huh. What are you going to do, lecture me to death?"

I walk close to him and lower my voice, it is thick and tight, deep and threatening. Without backing down, I move around the counter getting close enough that he is uncomfortable. I speak slowly so that even he can understand, "You have no idea what I would do to protect Mahri and to keep her integrity intact. You have no idea of the places that I would go to to protect her life and her honor."

"Is that a threat?" He says, leaning in closer to me. I can feel his breath on my face.

"It is the truth and a warning. This is the last time I tell you to leave her out of all of this. Mahri did everything that she could to help save Hannah, a stranger. She worried about you all and tried to make sure that you were safe. She is a wonderful, loyal, and trustworthy person who deserves nothing but praise and love. If you don't see things that way, there is no room for you here."

I shove past him to the door and open it, allowing him the space he needs to leave.

His face is red, he isn't ready to stop fighting.

"You better listen to what he says," Phillip says. "Until you can abide by his rules, there is no place for you here."

Thomas's anger is fueled even more. "You are going to pick this...deceitful...piece of trash over me? You are going to take his side?"

"I am absolutely choosing his side. It is the right one. Mahri is amazing. She is none of the things you say. Furthermore, Jake is more loyal and trustworthy than you have ever been. You need to fix whatever you have going on inside that pretty little brain of yours before you come into the lives of my friends or my bar." Phillip is calm, but his voice is threatening.

"Now I can't go to the Aurora?" Thomas whines.

"I don't think I can trust your words or your actions. I do have the right to refuse service to anyone, after all."

"Who needs you or your damn bar? Are you coming Dan?" He asks in frustration, but it almost sounds like he is begging.

"Not with you. Not until you fix a whole lot of wrong things that you have said tonight and not until you can be trusted around Mahri. I support Jake's ban on you. Phil's too. Look, man, we have been friends for a long time, but you are out of line here. You are out of control. I don't know what you and Hannah have going on, but you need to fix it and until then, I can not be around you." Dan is sad and hangs his head, but his feet are firm. He will stand his ground.

I see the rage beginning to wane in Thomas' eyes. He pulls his jacket off of the chair aggressively and rushes to the door which I was holding open for him.

"You all deserve each other." He growls as he stomps to the door and stops and stares me down once more. When I don't flinch or waiver, he turns away and quickly heads out the door bumping into someone on the way.

It is Mahri, my sweet, drunk, beautiful, kind woman. She brings the sweet scent of orange blossoms and lights up the walls of this old cabin. I have never wanted to see her so badly. She is wearing the shortest black dress I have ever seen and some heels that make her legs look even longer and her ass look even more delightful. I need her and as if on cue, she rushes to me wrapping her arms around my neck. I hold her tight and dive in quickly for a kiss. The moment lasts longer than it should as my hands begin to roam. I forget about the other people in the room until she turns away. She is the oxygen to my lungs. She is my medicine.

"Hello, handsome..." She begins as her hands move to my hair. She plays with the curls at the base of my neck. I have almost forgotten the events of the evening because she feels so good in my arms. I must have still had some leftover aggression on my face because her next words are of concern. She asks, "What is wrong? What happened?"

Betty and Jessy fly through the door, "Mahri, you didn't even wait for the cab to stop complete..." Jessy begins but her thoughts are cut off by the tension in the room. Her eyes meet Daniel's as he walks over to greet her and gives her a bear hug. She quickly plants a kiss on his cheek.

Betty walks across the room to deliver a steamy kiss on Phillip's lips and they wrap their arms around each other. "What is going on?" Betty asks, "Who do I need to torture?"

The three men look at each other. Phillip begins, "It appears that Thomas is threatened by Jake and that Jake doesn't handle anyone disparaging the name of his beloved."

"It also appears," I continue sending a smirk to Phillip, "that Mahri and I have two very loyal friends who will step in to defend our honor."

Daniel adds, "And it also appears that Thomas won't be attending any events here or at the bar for the foreseeable future."

Jessy's mouth drops ope. Her hand moves to cover her mouth.

Betty's eyes are filled with confusion and venom.

Mahri watches me and begins to laugh. "I need to know all of the details. When did you get a poker table? I hope you beat his sorry ass at the game. Thank you for being such loyal friends. Boys grab a beer, girls kick off your shoes, and get comfy, it is time for our bedtime story, but first, who needs another drink?"

I smile. The tension has been lifted from the room by this precious woman in my arms. In an instant, she diffused a situation that could have ruined the evening. I kiss her deeply and then whisper in her ear, "You can take those shoes off now, but we have plans for them later when the company leaves."

She nods and blushes, following me to the kitchen.

I wrap my arm around her waist and speak loudly for everyone to hear. "Mahri is having coffee." Mahri pouts. "You will thank me for that later. "I add as I look at her and wink. "Would anyone else like something?"

I take their requests and Mahri and I make drinks. Everyone is served and Mahri plops down into the love seat next to me. Her dress is short and I find the perfect spot to rest my wandering hands. She leans on my shoulder and sighs in contentment.

I place a kiss on her neck and survey the room. Phillip and Betty are sitting on one end of the couch whispering secrets in each other's ear. She is giggling, free, and innocent like a schoolgirl with her crush. I trust the man sitting next to her and am thankful that he makes her feel safe and cherished. Daniel and Jessy are watching the fire from the other end of the couch, he has his arm wrapped around her, their hand entwined between them. The comfort they share from years of friendship and trust has led to an abiding love that requires no words to speak of their affection. It is a silent fire, created by a spark that began long before I entered this family. It is a love that I never would have understood three months ago and is comforting and true.

The house is warm and inviting, but not because of the fire. I am reminded, as I sit with Mahri, of the love that filled this cabin when my mother and Nana were alive. I can feel them here welcoming our love and our brothers and sisters. I rest with her in my arms and feel something I hadn't in a while. These people are my family. We will fight for and with each other. That is a comfort that I had forgotten about.

We stay like this for a while, the six of us reveling in our love. We are at home in the presence of each other. There is something reverent at this moment. This cabin seems sacred now for reasons beyond the love of Mahri. I am glad to share that feeling with these people.

I am afraid to break the spell. But I, finally and reluctantly, do so.

I have plans with a beautiful woman in a black dress and it is getting late.

I sit up and adjust Mahri n my lap grazing her cheek with my lips as I do so, "Boys, we have a story to tell, where should we begin?"

#jake x mc #duskwood #jake duskwood #duskwood jake #duskwood jake x mc #duskwood fandom #iamjake #duskwood fanfiction #duskwood everbyte #duskwood mc

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sasuhinasno1fan · 9 months

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Wish come true - Adrien AUGreste Day 18+19

I imagined this one going slightly different but it ended the same, Adrien's Italian anger coming out in defense of the people he loves. Another thank you to @etherealxgenie for betaing. Masks

Adrien was still reeling from what happened earlier. He’d immediately gone to the Liberty after they left and they had to video chat Ivan and Rose – who surprisingly was home – to tell them the news. If he thought they were excited, Anarka was even more so. She might not like Jagged Stone but she was more than willing to cause trouble for Bob Roth. Adrien just hoped Juleka and Luka recorded when the two finally met.

He was typing out an email to his dad, bursting with excitement when he heard the front door open. He dropped his laptop to the side and climbed down his bed, running to the front door.

“Mama, Mama, you’re never going to believe what just happened! I got to meet – oh. I didn’t know we had a guest coming over.” behind his mother was an older gentleman. Compared to his father’s own style of suits, this man looked like a stereotypical high-profile lawyer, with his pressed suit and squirmy looking face.

“Adrien, I don’t know if you remember Signor St Claire? You went to school with his daughter Elizabeth in New York?”

Elizabeth? Then Adrien remembered. “Betty St Claire. Class president and president of the cultural society.”

“That’s my girl!”

And also, the most spoiled brat in the whole school. She was like Lila in terms of annoyance and Chloe, pre-change, in terms of behavior. She constantly insulted those she thought was beneath her, acting like her behavior was completely acceptable. Most of the students hated her, but because her father was a diplomat who was well known to be connected with politicians and the current president – who happened to also be a superhero – they would bend to her will. Adrien never had to, except when her mother was invited to parties by Betty’s father. Then, he had to pretend he was a follower of her, like he was this spoiled diplomat kid who had power and abused it whenever he wanted.

He hated that persona diplomate kids took, acting like just because their parents moved and they had a high pay check to pay for things it meant they could treat people who didn’t have that like crap. It took Adrien a long time to accept what his parents did as they’d been doing it since he was a child. It was rare they’d let him stay with his nonna in Italy while they moved. He learned to work with what he lived with, even more so when the fighting was getting worse. He had every right to be like those other kids but he wasn’t going to let them turn him into something he wasn’t. So, he didn’t spend much time with Betty, not playing her mind games, unless he had no choice. Betty had her father wrapped around her finger and she knew it. in a school full of people whose parents needed him for something, if they pissed her off or went against her, all she had to do was go crying to daddy and all that support would be ripped away. With her dad standing right there, it didn’t take much for Adrien to guess why he was here.

“I hear you’ve been pretty close to these new heroes and villains. Must have been quite scary getting akumatized.”

“Something like that. Thankfully people like mama are trying to do things that will help.”

“And we’re hoping Signor St Claire will offer his support as well.” his mother said.

“You’re really gonna have to convince me, Rossi. So, what are you going to make me for dinner?”

Oh god, he was one of those guys.

“Take out. You’ll be staying at the Italian Embassy while we host you, I’m sure you’ll get sick of Italian food very quickly. Adrien, caro, why don’t you suggest something?”

“Ever had bahn mi?”

“N-no. can’t say I have. I’ll have to ask for your suggestion.”

“While Adrien does that, how about a glass of wine?”

That brightened him up. “If you’d be so kind.”

Because the kitchen was open into the living area, Adrin slipped into Italian, but still spoke softly. Betty might not have passed her foreign language classes but he wasn’t sure about her father.

“What’s going on?”

“After Hero Day, all those who came to France to offer help and suggestions finally agreed on things that should be implemented. But after going over the budget, we don’t have as much funds. Most money is put towards counseling for those who’ve been akumatized and we don’t feel right taking money from that for these suggestions. So, we’ve asked our countries to donate and even gone to the UN. We’re getting a grant from them but we’re still missing a substantial amount, an amount that most countries wouldn’t think to have set aside for instances like this. Except, of course…”

“For the US, New York specifically.”

With all the heroes and villains that lived and centered themselves in the city, it wouldn’t be surprising if a lot of funding was directed there. And because Signor St Claire was so close with those who controlled the direction of the money…

“Will he say yes?”

“That’s what this visit is about. I wish your father was here, he’s much better at this interacting with people part.” His mama was more of ‘Let’s solve this problem together’ compared to his father’s ‘Hi, it’s so nice to meet you. Let's be friends so if either of us need something, we can come to each other.’ “We’re even having a ball to celebrate connections between Italy and America that he’ll be representing America at. Betty will also be there.”

“Mama.”

“Adrien, please. You know I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important.”

And it was, god damnit, it was. If Paris wasn’t prepared for events where Miraculous Reset didn’t happen after a fight or if the heroes were unaware of the akuma due to its powers, they’d need help.

“You wanted to tell me something when we came in?”

Tell his mother about the best thing while they both had to deal with this? He was getting better at not hiding things from his parents, minus the thing with Lila, but he was sure Luka couldn’t begrudge him this.

“Not important. I’ll play nice.”

_______________________________

Luka looked around the reception area of the Italian Embassy. He’d seen pictures of a lot of museums and well-known buildings and castles in Italy and it seemed to fit. He mostly heard Italian being spoken, able to pick up a few words from what Adrien taught him, a bit of English and very accented French. The receptionist finally came around the corner, a man following her.

“Signor? This is Signor St Claire. He’ll be accepting the delivery.”

“I hear you have the name cards? And the ones for table settings?”

“Yes sir.” Luka handed him the box in question. He flinched a little when he pulled out a pocket knife to cut the tape and judging from the receptionist's face, she didn’t like it either. Opening the box and pulling out one of the cards, M. St Claire looked them over before nodding.

“Perfect. Here you go son.” He pulled out a $100 US bill and handed it to Luka, collapsing his knife and taking the box and leaving.

He looked at the sort of useless bill. His mom had a collection of $1 from every country she visited but he wasn’t planning on visiting America anytime soon. He was still trying to see if his school’s request to College Dupont would be accepted to allow him to join their class trip to London. He turned to the receptionist who’s exasperated face matched his.

“You can 100% say no, but do you mind…?”

“Of course. In fact, the Ambassador is heading to America with Signor St Claire when he leaves, I’m sure he’ll have change. I’ll be right back.”

“Thank you.” Unclipping his helmet, he pulled it off, ruffling his hair, wondering if he should text Adrien. The band’s parents were going to need to speak with Bob Roth and Jagged Stone to work out the details of the contract and their debut. He still couldn’t believe it when Adrien and Marinette told them. Adrien’s piano skills caught the rocker’s attention so much, he was giving them this chance to impress him just as much and Luka was dying to prove him right in giving them this chance.

“It’s so pretty!” Tikki climbed out of his hood, hiding under his hair as she looked around. “Is Adrien here?”

“I don’t know. I guess I could at least say hi to his mom.”

“It’s so small!” A new voice, accented French, worse than M. St Claire’s, echoed loudly in the hall as a girl Juleka’s age, with long curly red hair and a sneer on her lips came down the stairs. Following her, this odd look on his face was Adrien. “The school’s foyer is bigger than this. Daddy expects the party to be here?”

“The ballroom is big enough for the guest list.” Adrien said with a small smile. It didn’t seem real though.

“Please, it’s daddy. If they were at all smart, they’d have the ball at the hotel that idiot Mayor owns. I mean, can he even do that? Own a hotel, a movie company and run Paris? Though I guess the rest of the city knows where the actual power lies, with that brat of a daughter. I met her and she acted like she was so much better, with her little dog following her every word.”

Luka noticed Adrien’s hands clench, though the smile never left his face.

“Betty, this way, all the attention can be on you and your dad. A bigger ballroom would take away from that.”

The sneer morphed into a deformed smirk. “It would be a shame if that weren’t able to happen. My dress is from one of the best designers in New York. I hope you picked up some sense of fashion living here. I swear, you used to just wear whatever during free dress day at school.”

Luka then noticed it, Adrien’s heart song. It was normally a very pleasant piano melody. It’s tune changes depending on his mood. His favourite was the giddy yet soft tone it took when he kissed him. This… this was like you not knowing how to play the piano in terms of its chaos but oddly at the same time, you did know and you were going for a soundtrack that expressed all the anger in the world. But he still had that smile on his face.

“Well, no one can beat your fashion.”

“Obviously.” She scoffed, reaching the bottom of the stairs and heading to the front door when she spotted him. “And who are you? Thieves won’t get very far.”

“I don’t think he’s a thief.” Adrien jumped in. “Helmet and the fact that he’s still standing here probably means delivery guy?”

“Whatever. Still sure he’s stealing. I’m getting security.” The girl walked off before Luka could defend himself.

“I’m so sorry. Are you ok?”

“Are you? I can hear your heart song, it’s in chaos and you’re mad, like really mad. What’s going on?”

Before Adrien could answer, the receptionist returned, change in hand. “Here you are. Signor Rossi, anything I can help you with? Where’s Signoria St Claire?”

St Claire? As in the man who was carrying around a knife?

“Attempting to get security. I’ll go stop her. Sorry.” Adrien apologized, before running off after Betty. As much as he wanted to go after him, something told him it was better to leave. But he needed one more bit of information.

“Sorry, but is Boulangerie Patisserie doing pastries here tomorrow? I work as a delivery person for them and I was curious if I needed to plan to arrive early for this ball.”

“As far as I know, they might? We also have a local Italian bakery doing food as well.”

“Why did you want to know if Marinette’s family were working the event?” Tikki asked as he got to his bike.

“I haven’t heard from Adrien all day, so I want to know if this discord is something only, I've seen or if it’s something everyone knows about.”

Marinette was working at the register, her mother talking to someone on the phone and her father working away if the noise from the kitchen was any indication. She perked up at the sight of him, waving him over.

“Have you talked to Adrien?”

“I just saw him at the Embassy. Do you know what’s going on?”

“I don’t know the whole story, but he was dropped off by an embassy car this morning.” An odd start. Once Adrien knew his way to school, he either took the walk through the park or took the metro. “There was a girl with him. Chloe recognised her and Alya found her online. Elizabeth St Claire. She might have followers who are jealous of her lifestyle but most comments are about her behaviour and even Chloe couldn’t stand her. She met her the day before; her dad is an American diplomat with some pretty rich friends.”

Rich friends? “Wait, did Chloe mention anything about the decision for implementing things to help with akumas?”

“I think she said they agreed on things. She might have also mentioned something about money?”

When the talks started, his mom had mentioned she hoped they could afford it. Having to create a new budget to deal with akumatization was difficult and since Miraculous Reset fixed everything, the budget was kinda small. If Adrien was willingly hanging out with a person who’s manners clearly made him mad but had him biting his tongue, then there was a chance he had to pretend to be ok with this.

“Is your family doing an order for an event at the Italian Embassy?”

“Yeah, that’s why my mom’s on the phone. She’s doing a final check of their order. Did you want to come? The event’s in two days. I could use a hand as a waiter.”

“Please.”

________________________

“Can you believe that Boudoir girl? She looks like a little girl in that dress.”

“Bourgeois. Like the fashion critic. That’s her mother.” Adrien said, keeping the stupid peace though all he wanted was to shave Betty’s hair off. She was dressed in a backless short dress and had the nerve to say something bad about Chloe’s dress, the asymmetric hem and lace looking dainty on her, especially with her hair down.

“God, she must be so embarrassed that’s her daughter. I think I’d just kill myself.”

And he wanted to take the serving dish Luka and Marinette were carrying around and slam it on her head. Three days, he’d put up with her insults for three days while his mother tried getting the head of the St Claire family to agree to fund the ScarCat Assistance Program, as his mother finally announced it. He’d even heard Alya going insane over being asked to use the name for it. He'd distanced himself from his friends to keep his cool, which made things worse when Betty, who was always in the embassy car when he was dropped off, would loudly insult anyone she saw, giving fake smiles when they turned to her. He wanted to actually be violent with her, but he couldn’t. Not yet, not until his mom was covered. There’d been no approach by Scarlet Bug or Catseye about the note they left and while Scarlet Bug had disappeared the time he and Luka were going to St Vincent for the pictures, there was no telling what would happen if neither of the heroes were there to reset everything. They needed to program.

“Oh my god, look at those wait staff. What is this, such a sad excuse for Molin Rouge adaptation?”

“Moulin Rouge.”

“Don’t you have anything better to do than correct me all day?” she asked, turning to him.

“Sorry.”

She scoffed at him, walking away and he let his mask break a little to glare at her. Clearly Lila had spoiled him, he forgot how annoying she was.

“Deep breaths.” A very welcomed voice said, lifting a tray to him full of macaroons. “Yellow is your favourite.”

“Passion fruit.” He plucked one off and looked at his boyfriend. “I haven’t spoken to you in a while.”

“Marinette filled me in. Your ‘friend’ knows how to make an impression. If I didn’t know you, I would assume you were fine with her abuse.”

“We’re this close to getting the program, I just need to keep her happy.”

“Adrien!” Betty reappeared, looking annoyed. “You left me talking to myself like an idiot.”

Pasting that smile on again, he looked apologetic, “I didn’t know you wanted me to follow you. Macaroon?”

“Does it have eggs?”

“It’s a meringue cookie, so yes.” Luka answered. When he got a confused look he explained further, “Meringues are made with egg whites.”

“Gross. Get lost. Come on.” she dragged Adrien away, who gave Luka an apologetic look over his shoulder.

This continued and the mask of not being bothered was getting harder and harder to keep when his mother stepped on the steps and taped a fork to her glass. Once the room fell quiet, she smiled brightly.

“As many of you know, myself and other diplomates came to Paris to assist the mayor in efforts to help combat Hawkmoth and his attacks. During Hero Day it became very apparent we could not let this slip by us any longer. Measures and suggestions have been agreed upon and the Mayor is ready to implement the ScarCat Assistance Program, named after the famed blog that documents the heroes’ rescues. Our only issue had been money, even with donations made by each country. Tonight however, at this ball to celebrate the bond Italy and America have, their diplomat Signor St Claire has signed a check of 4 million and has already secured from the President of America, a hero in her own right, another 4 billion to put towards the program. With this, we can help Scarlet Bug and Catseye and for those moments where their magic fails, we have a way of helping the city when they can’t. a round of applause for Signor St Claire.”

“What kind of name is ScarBug? It sounds like a disease.” Betty said.

“The only disease is you and the words you constantly spew. It’s like you love hearing the sound of your own voice, even when it’s only capable of saying hate and insults. Take a look in the mirror you porca Eva and actually think for a second if by the time you leave school if anyone is going to want to be around you. I have put up with you insulting my friends these past few days when all I wanted to do was shove you down the stairs. Grow the fuck up and vaffanculo!” Adrien finally spouted. He was loud enough that they certainly got attention, but his mother had the band start playing again if only to distract a little.

“You can’t talk to me that way!”

“Why? You gonna go crying to daddy and tell him to pull the funding? Please, do that, in front of this whole ballroom, including the mayor of Paris and the cameras he has focused on him. I guarantee you that you’ll have gotten your dad fired faster than you can backstab someone.”

Betty let out a frustrated scream and stomped off and a few people who’d dealt with her applauded. He couldn’t help but truly smile as she tried complaining to her father, who was in the middle of guests.

“Caro, a word?” his mother whispered. “What were you thinking? I know you don’t like her but insulting her that loudly? And what about that language? I’m ashamed of you.”

“Mama, normally I’d care, even when it was Lila, but I don’t. It was bad enough playing nice with her at school when I couldn’t ignore her. I had to do it now while she insulted my friends, my boyfriend, staff at the embassy, I’m pretty sure you at one time.”

“Adrien.”

“Mama, I have wanted to do that for ages. Please, punish me later, but let me revel in this, just a little. Oh wait, don’t punish me.”

“And why not? Mio dio Adrien, your behaviour was worse than when you yelled at the Agreste girl in the middle of class.”

“I wanted to tell you before, Jagged Stone.”

“Did you find out I got you tickets? I have half a mind to ban you now.”

“You got me tickets? Wait, I’ll go back to that later. No, Marinette was commissioned to make a jacket for him and I went with her to ask him to save a ticket for me until I could get dad to send me the money, but turns out Marinette gets free tickets for the class. I was messing around on his piano during his fitting and he thought I was so good, he’s gonna get Bob Roth to honour his promise of a contract and he wants us to open for him at his first concert. Mama, Kitty Section is going to open for Jagged Stone.”

“You are? Oh caro, that’s amazing news! I’m so proud of you. It’s not getting you out of punishment, but I’m so happy for you.”

Ok, well he tried. But the good thing was, it sounded like he could do it and bonus, he was finally able to pull Betty down a few pegs.

#adrien augreste #Adrien AUGreste 2023

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velvetwarfare · 10 days

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One of my all time favorite facts about Warlord Betty is the fact she is quite literally the opposite of Adam. Which makes it SO MUCH MORE FUN when she revisits him as a sinner.

Adam is the ‘protector of heaven’ and war commander of the Exorcists. Dude is actually p damn strategic, hits HARD, is goal motivated, has a raunchy sense of humor, REALLY strives to have respect, and stands by sinners don’t deserve to be winners. His Exorcists are all women — whether that be for the Valkyrie vibe or simply because he’s too insecure with a man in the picture that isn’t himself lol. His right hand woman is Lute, who’s even more violent than him and equally as loyal. Their choice of weapons are all over the place.

Betty is the ‘protector of the demented’ and war commander of The Antichrists. She’s also strategic on the battlefield, fights WAY TOO DIRTY for her own good, goal motivated, dark and sexual humor, REALLY strives for respect and to be loved despite her appearance and warped mentality, and stands by all divine must be slaughtered should they step foot into hell. Her Antichrists are also all women LMAO this is because she firmly believes women deserve more power than men, as men get insanely corrupted when given too much power (reference to how she was wrongly executed as a nosferatu fledgling and how that baron also was GOD AWFUL to his own people.) . Her right hand woman is Hesper, who’s more level headed than Betty solely because Betty gets OVERRAN with bloodlust during extermination days — so she serves as a second in command when Betty isn’t stable enough to deliver orders. They ALL use angelic tipped or non-angelic but rusty and blunt war axes — as she views axes to be the symbol of EXECUTION (another awful nod to her first death that commenced her downfall in sanity.).

This is why she refuses to interact with Adam when he’s still an archangel — affiliating with the divine would defeat the entire purpose of her organization and her steadfast advocacy. As a sinner, when he can FINALLY understand her POV on the Gods and the divine, she accepts him. You gotta be at her level to earn respect.

#🐀 OOC. 🐀

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emmym1 · 10 months

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My thoughts on... Spider-Gwen 2015B (#9-13) "Weapon of Choice"

As i'm continuing reading through these comics i have to say that I keep getting blown away by how incredibly good all of this is. I love how in depth her character gets explored and how complex Gwen is. And Spider-Gwen 2015B (#9-13) "Weapon of Choice" is no different.

It's really interesting to see the aftermath of Gwen losing her powers. It made her question things in a very different way. For the first time in her life she seems to have a choice in whether or not she wants superpowers but even now she doesn't really get to make that choice because Frank Castle is hunting her and her family down, forcing her to keep using the power ups she's gotten from the Spider-Women crossover event. Her inner monologue has always been very interesting to read in these comics and i love how this time around she's really questioning herself as the Spider-Woman. Questioning why she became the Spider-Woman. Did she do it to help people or did she do it for herself? She realizes that she made Spider-Woman mean so much because she was scared that in reality it didn't. She saw the spider bite as a gift and a curse, something she had no say in. So it had to mean something right? And before Frank Castle opened the hunt on her she finally had a choice and it made her question Spider-Woman so much. It's really interesting because there is also a side of her that does want to continue being Spider-Woman. And she feels frustrated that now that she was ready to do some good after finally accepting that not everything that happened with peter was her fault. But now that got taken away from her. The whole situation also causes a lot of guilt to come over her. Guilt about all the times she had to lie in order to protect her identity. Guilt about what happened to Peter Parker. Guilt about feeling like the mask is who she really is. It's super interesting because despite claiming that she finally accepted it's not all her fault, losing her powers made her feel a lot of guilt about everything that happened. It's amazing how complex her character and thoughts are. And how they explore it. I must say her inner monologue is scaringly similar to mine at times. She's a character I relate to in a lot of ways.

Seeing Frank Castle slowly becoming The Punisher again in this arc was also really cool. He lost everything in the process of trying to catch Spider-Woman. So now he feels he has to catch her no matter what to make it mean something. And Gwen interestingly relates to that, because she too has lost a lot because of her being Spider-Gwen, and that's also part as to why she has to make it mean so much to her.

The Weapon of Choice arc ultimately ends with Captain Stacy giving himself up to the police in order to protect Gwen and attone for the manhunt he started on her. He gets arrested because in the eyes of the police he was helping Spider-Woman. It's his way of taking responsibilty for what he did and finally standing besides his daughter, a way for him to convince the world Spider-Woman is a good person. The issue ends with Gwen being completely lost in every sense of the word and being forced into a position to take upon a sketchy deal with the kingpin of crime: matt murdock. As he's the only lawyer that can get captain stacy out of prison. The volume also included a cool halloween special with Mysterio that happens after the Weapon of Choice arc. And it was pretty cool, it reminded me a lot of the mysterio sequence in Spider-Man: Far From Home and it really confronted Gwen some of her biggest fears. Betty was also a badass in this and had a rly fun moment. We also learn that she might be dating the falcon so that was interesting. Overall the Mary Janes are a really fun group of characters and i would love to see more of them! All by all i'm really loving this run so far. Everything is so incredibly well done and Gwen is a super complex character with a lot of thought put behind it. To me she's super relatable and some of the stuff really hits home. So yeah it's been an amazing experience reading this run so far!

#spider gwen #comics

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mlobsters · 11 months

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supernatural s6e11 appointment in samarra (w. sera gamble, robert singer)

reminds me a bit of where julia went to get medical/god related problem fixed in the magicians (sera gamble showrunner)

the magicians s2e7 plan b

is dean gonna try to make an appointment with big d death by temporarily killing himself

DEATH Sam's soul or Adam's.

DEAN But --

DEATH As a rule, I don't bring people back. I might make an exception once, not twice. So...Pick.

eyeroll. frankly forgot adam was there too, and felt like the show did too. but hey opportunity for dean to have to make a completely inevitable but guilt inducing choice for sam, you know they can't pass that up.

DEATH She's right. Nothing lasts forever. Well, I do, but...

*rimshot*

so pretty

DEATH I want you to be me for one day.

all right i mean, i mentioned this in the last one too, but sam is understandably pissed what with dean going behind his back to work a deal with death for his soul, essentially a medical decision. we're so far afield from reality, but thinking about it from a disability justice standpoint.

anyway. i liked death got up in dean's face to remind him that he's.... death.

TESSA Wow. They'll just let any slack-jawed haircut be Death these days.

lol what a random insult. dean and his generic hair (of which i pretty much have the same haircut at the moment)

oh what is robosam up to now. i don't even remember what the beef was with balthazar. rereading the summary, i must have been really out of it trying to watch that episode.

BALTHAZAR Well. The plot thickens. Where's your soul, Sam? Good God, no. It's not still...It is.

SAM My brother found a way to put it back in me. I don't want it.

BALTHAZAR No, you don't. No, no, 'cause Michael and Lucy are hate-banging it as we speak.

sigh. (it's a metaphor and that's that)

i suppose this (going after bobby) is supposed help us remember that soulless!sam isn't just harmless and fun and helpful like they have been selling so nicely the past few episodes.

obviously we were gonna have to kill a kid in his rounds. but i do not understand this whole, i'm putting my foot down thing. because isn't that breaking the rules and that means no soul for sam??

dean is shockingly bad at following the rules here. like. what. was the point of this. getting sam's soul was not enough motivation to suck it up?

here we go again (goin down the only road we've ever known)

i see. gotta teach dean a lesson, that you can tie into sort of consequences of them dying/not dying on the regular.

DEATH I wouldn't do it for you. You and your brother keep coming back. You're an affront to the balance of the universe, and you cause disruption on a global scale.

DEAN I apologize for that.

DEATH But you have use. Right now, you're digging at something. The intrepid Detective. I want you to keep digging, Dean.

hmm.

also, make it seem less horrible that they're forcing the soul into him against his will if he's willing to straight up murder bobby to keep it out. he's not able to make rational decisions, don't need consent now!

i get it. but also :p

jackles and julian richings work really well together (though i think julian is doing the heavy lifting). good conversations. and it's nice they're fleshing out death's character some

DEATH It might feel a little… itchy. Do me a favor, don't scratch the wall. Trust me, you're not gonna like what happens.

that's so funny, when i read in fic he was scratching at the wall, i didn't expect it to be described as exactly that.

ok then. next episode ought to be interesting

(wiki)

Tessa: Just so you know, when people die they might have questions for you. Well, you know, not you, but Death.

Dean: You mean like, how did Betty White outlast me? Betty White was an American actress, animal rights activist, author, comedian, radio host, singer, and television personality born in 1922. She passed away in 2021, ironically outlasting Dean Winchester himself.

NO. bad wiki

#supernatural #spnwatch #spn 6x11 #julian richings #robosam #for the last time?#the magicians #sera gamble #robert singer #mangled whitesnake lyrics #spn-tm-thoughts

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fantomcomics · 1 year

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What’s Out This Week? 4/5

Better late than never, right?

Disney Villains: Scar #1 - Chuck Brown,Trevor Fraley & Jahnoy Lindsay

A startling new vision starring Disney's greatest villain, set within the world of The Lion King! Eisner and Ringo Award-winning author Chuck Brown (Bitter Root) and stunning artist Trevor Fraley tell a tale of fire and fury, centered on an enraged Scar, unable to accept that he will never be king - not so long as long as Mufasa and his new son inhabit Pride Rock. A plan is starting to formulate within Scar's corrupt mind, which will bring him face-to-face with the mysterious shaman, Rafiki...

Hairball #1 (of 4) - Matt Kindt & Tyler Jenkins

A brand-new supernatural nightmare that's Junji Ito meets Hayao Miyazaki from the Eisner-nominated creators of Fear Case and Apache Delivery Service. A young girl with a black cat begins to suspect the innocuous beast is behind all her troubles: her parents' fighting, family plagues, and innumerable supernatural horrors. As she tries her best to rid herself of this creature, she discovers that maybe the cat is not evil after all and a greater terror may be behind these horrific events harming her life.

Junk Rabbit #1 (of 5) - Jimmie Robinson

A new hero rises from mountains of consumer waste, mass homelessness, and devastating climate change. Some call the hero a myth, an urban legend, but others know that it's the JUNK RABBIT come to life!

JIMMIE ROBINSON brings a new take to the dystopian tale of how climate disaster alters not only our world, but also the heroes that literally rise from it. Swamp Thing meets RoboCop.

Parachute Kids GN - Betty Tang

Feng-Li can't wait to discover America with her family! But after an action-packed vacation, her parents deliver shocking news: They are returning to Taiwan and leaving Feng-Li and her older siblings in California on their own. Suddenly, the three kids must fend for themselves in a strange new world-and get along. Starting a new school, learning a new language, and trying to make new friends while managing a household is hard enough, but Bro and Sis's constant bickering makes everything worse. Thankfully, there are some hilarious moments to balance the stress and loneliness. But as tensions escalate-and all three kids get tangled in a web of bad choices-can Feng-Li keep her family together?

Second Coming: Trinity #1 (of 6) - Mark Russell, Richard Pace & Leonard Kirk

Back again: The book that turned the comics industry upside-down with "quite a bit of humor...[and] a lot of heart" (The New York Times). Jesus Christ, the Son of God, tackles his biggest challenge in 2000 years: babysitting a child with super powers! Meanwhile, his roommate-the superhero called Sunstar-faces his greatest enemy, and his own guilt, in a court of law. Written and co-created by 2022 Eisner winner Mark Russell with art by co-creator Richard Pace and Leonard Kirk.

Sonic The Hedgehog #1 5th Anniversary Edition - Ian Flynn, Tracy Yardley & Tyson Hesse

It has been five years since Sonic the Hedgehog #1, can you believe it?! Five years of friendship, speediness, and chili dogs! To celebrate, we're getting the team back together! Join Ian Flynn and Tracy Yardley for a reprint of #1, plus an all-new bonus short story, a look at how the comics get made, and more!

The Sprite & The Gardener TP - Rii Abrego & Joe Whitt

Long, long ago, sprites were the caretakers of gardens. Every flower was grown by their hand. But when humans appeared and began growing their own gardens, the sprites' magical talents soon became a thing of the past. When Wisteria, an ambitious, kindhearted sprite, starts to ask questions about the way things used to be, she'll begin to unearth her long-lost talent of gardening. But her newly honed skills might not be the welcome surprise she intends them to be. The Sprite and the Gardener, the debut graphic novel by Joe Whitt and Rii Abrego, is bursting with whimsical art and vibrant characters. Join our neighborhood of sprites in this beautiful, gentle fantasy where both gardens and friendships blossom.

Star Trek Deep Space Nine: The Dog Of War #1 - Mike Chen & Angel Hernandez

BORK! An extremely rare purebred corgi from Earth makes its way aboard Deep Space 9 when Quark cuts a deal to procure it for a high buyer. After all, a Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all! But Latinum the corgi comes with unexpected cargo that shakes Captain Benjamin Sisko to the core: a Borg component discovered by a crew sent to uncover Cardassian technology after the station's reoccupation. Don't miss out on this exclusive "lost episode" celebrating the 30th anniversary of the fan-favorite show Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and debut comic series by acclaimed author Mike Chen (Star Wars: Brotherhood) and Star Trek comics artist extraordinaire Angel Hernandez!

Sweet Paprika: Black, White & Pink One-Shot - Mirka Andolfo

Infernum Press' sexy CCO, created by Harvey Award-winning superstar MIRKA ANDOLFO, returns with some all-new stories for a special in black, white, and...pink!

A selection of fun and spicy adventures set within the SWEET PAPRIKA universe, presented by an outstanding array of talent from across the comics and entertainment industry, including KATANA COLLINS (Batman: White Knight Presents: Harley Quinn, Soul Stripper), STJEPAN ŠEJIC (Harleen, SUNSTONE), RETSU TATEO (Full Metal Panic), KIM KRIZAN (Before Sunrise), STEVE ORLANDO (Marauders, Scarlet Witch, COMMANDERS IN CRISIS), and more!

Tista GN Vol 1 - Tatsuya Endo

In New York City, the NYPD struggles to track down a serial killer known as Sister Militia, who has been targeting mobsters and other criminals in the Big Apple. No one knows who Sister Militia really is except a few residents of a Catholic orphanage. Her name is Tista...

Wheel Of Time: The Eye Of The World TP - Chuck Dixon, Robert Jordan & Chase Conley

The Eye of the World: The Graphic Novel has been hailed as an exciting interpretation of Robert Jordan's classic fantasy novel. The first volume introduces Rand al'Thor and his friends Matrim and Perrin at home in Emond's Field, shortly before the spring festival. Moiraine Damodred and Lan Mandragoran appear and almost before Rand knows it, a vicious band of half-men, half beasts invade the Two Rivers seeking their master's enemy. Moiraine must persuade Rand al'Thor and his friends to leave their home and enter a larger unimaginable world filled with dangers waiting in the shadows and in the light.

Whatcha snagging this week, Fantom Fam?

#WOTW #What's Out This Week?#comic #comics #comic book #comic books #manga #Wheel Of Time #Tista #Sweet Paprika #Star Trek #DS9 #The Sprite & The Gardener #Sonic The Hedgehog #Second Coming #Parachute Kids #Junk Rabbit #Hairball #Scar

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riverdale-retread · 2 years

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Riverdale s6 Ep 19 (#114: Witches of Riverdale).

Friends! Romans! This episode was unbelievable.

I watched this on the treadmill because I’m an #overseas Riverdale fan and I get these episodes a whole month and change after the stateside folks but I had to get off the moving walkway because I was laughing too much. I haven’t experienced this much untrammeled joy from a TV show in my recent (very faulty) memory.

Some disclaimers:

I don’t know anything about Sabrina Pun-Name (I mean really, they gave a witch the last name SPELL + MAN) so if you’re someone who knows the deep lore of that show, please let me know if I’m missing the point entirely. By the way, what I got out of this episode is that Sabrina is an unethical asshole but I don’t know if having context for her life would make me feel differently.

This recap is going to have a lot of fandom asides and performance commentary which I usually try to keep to a minimum.

First thing! Jughead is narrating even though he’s dead. He acknowledges that he’s dead. This is headspinningly funny because he calls himself the narrator, and he’s dead, and he’s also somehow fully aware of what’s going on while he’s technically mostly dead (in the Princess Bride way!) and telling us about it. He’s a dead, literally unreliable narrator who is also self aware that he is both in a story and also talking to me, a Netflix subscriber. Riverdale is genius.

The survivors of the Girls Count When It’s a Shitty Thing version of the Death of the First Born (sons) are in the lovely cemetery paying their respects to Nana Blossom. They are Heather, Betty, Veronica, Tabitha and Cheryl. Nana Rose gets a very beautiful pink flecked marble gravestone that looks like wounded flesh actually, so given that she died of asphyxiation following immolation, this choice is very Cheryl.

I’m assuming that everyone else got a headstone too just gauging from where people are looking and gesturing, but the production doesn’t actually show us, I assume for budget issues.

Poor Cheryl. How come fandom never talks about Cheryl’s trauma? She’s always been so tribal and family obsessed, but one by one all her family has died before she even reached 30.

Percival has the gall to show up to this gathering with Uncle Fucking Frank in tow.

Cheryl, in the throes of her grief, yells at him about killing “my Nana and my Tee-Tee.” Cheryl grieves literally nobody else.

Veronica yells at Percival about killing Anthony because Baby Anthony was a Baby. Percival takes his leave, which makes Jughead sound suddenly energized. He tells us with palpable gusto - “I’ll let you in on a secret.” To which I must wonder - Who does he think he’s talking to?

The funeral was a misdirect, he says, because it wasn’t a genuine funeral since no actual bodies were in the grave. They’re dead, for sure, and in the morgue freezers. Jughead says this like somehow this is exceptional, even though it isn’t.

We cut to Dr. Curdle (no longer referred to as Junior) eating a sandwich dead-eyed and alone in his work room (complete with apple!). I object to this. Dr. Curdle is a fun funky little weirdo - he’s a big fan of Josie and he’s music night date (boy?)friends with Principal Weatherbee. Why is he relegated to having a sad solo sandwich lunch in his depressing workroom? His meal is so wholesome too - milk, apple, sandwich. He is pivotal to all the Scooby plans and yet nobody thinks to invite him to lunch - he is no more or less off putting than Kevin or Jughead at their worst, so what gives?

Then we are given a glimpse of a moment that made the top of my head twist right off:

Kevin tends to a fussy Baby Anthony in his crib. Kevin touches Baby Anthony and tucks him in. Which is more than the now-dead Fangs ever did before his demise.

Kevin, Cheryl, Veronica, Heather Tabitha and Betty take in Alice’s newscast, which claims that it was gang warfare that resulted in so many deaths at the Toni/Fangs wedding celebration at the Whte Wyrm. Betty switches it off, annoyed. Tabitha speculates the reason for Percival not killing every First Born in town - that it would be harder to cover up. Otherwise there might be thousands of deaths. How big is Riverdale again??

We come to the Sabrina (What was Her Name Again) Spellman introduction. She’s Buffy, right? “Cheerleader by Day, Queen of Hell by Night” sounds like Buffy Summers, who had an intentionally silly name and not as on the nose as Spell-man. Heather is doing the exposition dump on Sabrina.

The resurrection attempted by the necromancing witches have to be performed within 3 days. You know. Like that other guy. The guy who came back on the 3rd day. They only have 12 hours left, is what Veronica says, but Sabrina is nowhere to be seen.

Cheryl has decided to display, among all her other art (like the one dedicated to long-forgotten Minerva Marble), her self portrait as a Vixen/ Furry / Fox Head thing to all her friends, who presumably are too wigged out to notice or ask about it.

Kevin wants to know how and why Baby Anthony didn’t die, even though he was a First Born. So how exactly does the First Born business work though?? First born to either parent qualifies? (Jughead wasn’t FP’s first born but I suppose he was Glady’s). Betty points out that Kevin is also a first born. But then again, not every single first born in Riverdale died, so what gives?

Apart and hidden from the others, Kevin tells Betty that he thinks the reason he was permitted to survive this very shoddily constructed plague was to be punished with survival. This is bullshit. He has no answer to what would be worse than murdered or how survival counts as punishment. No answer, none. He just says this so he can join Moose, who has already absconded to NYC. He makes shit up about doing this to ‘protect’ others. Betty arbitrarily says that ‘everyone else will understand’ but actually I think Kevin is RUNNING AWAY FROM single fatherhood with Baby Anthony. Betty understands the urge to run away from being a parent, apparently, but the facts are these:

Baby Anthony is an orphan now, and the person who would’ve been his third parent, the person who in fact began court proceedings to gain sole custody over him is completely abandoning him now that he’s alone in the world (notwithstanding the complete faith that everyone decides to have put in Sabrina). Kevin is a POS.

Meanwhile, Reggie, who I think is also a first born, has just made a delivery to Percival of the Daggers of Megiddo (which google says is a thing invented in the Omens movie series, and are weapons intended to defeat the antichrist) all the way from Rome.

He did what now? Reggie went to Rome and obtained “arcane objects of immense power” on his own and we don’t get to see any of it?

Reggie is a very precise speaker. He says he did enjoy the trip to Rome, but is irked by the death of his ‘high school friends.’ Not “friends from High School days,” not “old friends,” and definitely not “friends” in the present sense.

While Veronica was absent from the Babylonium for all of exactly 60 hours, Percival has managed to call a board meeting, mind control everyone into both showing up and doing his bidding (I presume mind control was involved, though Veronica was not actually beloved by her own board) and got Reggie installed as CEO.

Either Veronica doesn’t know or she doesn’t care, because she’s ensconced at Thornhill with all the surviving girls of Riverdale. Betty bursts in on the sad group, who are just staring off into the middle distance, to say that Mary Andrews asks her what’s going on with Archie, about whom she had a ‘bad feeling.’ Betty sounds rather frantic as she asks what they will tell Mary Andrews if the resurrection plan doesn’t work.

I’m going to do two things here : 1) snort at the idea that Mary Andrews gives enough of a shit about Archie to have any sort of long distance intuition about him whatsoever and 2) be sad at the thought that absolutely nobody, not JB, not Gladys, nobody, has any sort of need to keep in regular contact with Jughead to make the same kind of inquiry.

Remembering she is Catholic only in moments of need (like most of us), Veronica cautiously asks where ‘the souls’ of the deceased are, so that we can get the theology download. They’re all in the Sweet Hereafter!

We get shown what that is!!

They’re playing Fred Astaire’s Cheek to Cheek throughout for this portion. I love this song and in this rendition. “Heaven/ I’m in Heaven/ and My Heart beats so/ that I can hardly speak” is the way the lyrics go. In case we the audience might be confused about what this place is. (The lyrics will do the heavy lifting the scriptwriters refuse to engage with!)

Archie’s Sweethereafter are a wife and two kids in front of a heavily laden dinner table in his house that he never wants to leave. The wife is Betty. They named their kids Polly and Fred.

I don’t understand this culture of naming people after other people, especially not those who lived unhappy lives or died violent deaths. My culture doesn’t do this. Plus there’s something frightening about Betty naming her kid Polly - it’s not as awful as naming her ALICE perhaps, but Betty had a lot of intensely negative, conflicted feelings about Polly. Same with Archie naming his son after his father. Grandpa Fred is such a sainted presence in Dad Archie’s mind, that I am immediately worried about Little Fred.

Little Fred is great at music and sports, but performs academically poorly. How interesting! In Archie’s perfect world, he wants a son who struggles academically and is only good at the things that he himself tried to be good at. I say tried to be, because it’s not clear whether Archie ever got actual A’s in music or if his one child molestor teacher gave him those grades for obvious reasons. This is the opposite of, say, the desires of Forrest Gump, who also struggled but wanted his son to be really good at school. Archie’s heaven is appallingly self serving - he wants his kid to be bad at school so he can comfort his kid about bad grades. He will concede a daughter to Betty that achieves as much as she did.

Oh and his same dog from his childhood is an immortal freak animal that never died. OR he did the Michael Jackson thing and insisted on owning a series of dogs that he called Vegas over and over.

Jughead’s heaven is markedly different. He is served coffee by Pop at the thriving Diner, with an array of Mad House Glads, his comic book, laid out in front of him. I know this is exposition but the egotism of this is so funny. Jughead in heaven is only inspired by the evidence of his own prolific creativity. Oh, and further, Jughead has great draftsmanship in Heaven, instead of his sad stick figure art that he had to make do with in reality.

Toni and Fang’s joint heaven is a very weird mishmash. I suspect (because I don't like Fangs) that this is Toni’s heaven and Fangs is just along for the ride (much like Heaven Betty is in Archie’s fantasy).

Serpents and the Ghoulies sign a peace treaty on what looks like parchment paper. They have expensive pens in a little marble and brass stand like they’re at a summit of actual political leaders. I am surprised they don’t have tiny flags arrayed to mark the occasion. Toni’s vanity is on a scale I had not expected from her to date. She wants to act like head of state, and for GANGS to function like sovereign nations. Toni takes the title Serpent Queen really very literally. (I also think she doesn’t know a whole lot about the way treaties between warring nations frequently DON’T function, but she studied social work and not history or polisci so I will have to let this go.)

Fangs says that Riverdale will be ‘more unified’ but I’m not sure what this means. The two gangs are no longer at war, so are they diving up territory? Did they merge??

Anthony is all grown up and looks older than both of his parents. And Twyla is there with her son Timmy. The two boys look at each other meaningfully. I’m very surprised by how much Anthony is styled like Malachai, formerly of the less Disneyfied Ghoulies - cut off sleeves, curls, muscular. And Timmy the Ghoulie Prince is Jughead coded.

Back in the real world, Kevin is hurriedly packing up. I hate him because he takes care to pack a big framed photo of Baby Anthony in the act of abandoning Baby Anthony wholesale. There was no discussion at all whatsoever for who should be responsible for keeping this infant alive in Kevin’s absence, you know, but gosh, Kevin will take A PHOTO with him. He is met at the door by his father and Uncle Fucking Frank, who say Percival wants a word.

Meanwhile, Reggie invites his father to come over and enjoy himself at the Babylonium, dancing and swaggering alone in the CEO suite in front of his own Lodge-esque portrait. Reggie’s main connection to anything in this world, love or hate, is about his father, but his main influence is Hiram.

And finally! We are introduced to Sabrina Spellman, who took her own sweet time coming over to Riverdale because there were other things happening in other “realms.”

Then follows what must be a crossover or something because I just lost my mind.

But I have to also ask: Am I supposed to hate Sabrina Spellman after seeing her in action? Is this what she was like on her own show? A self serving, obnoxious liar?

The next bit is loosely organized into a list of Sabrina Spellman’s Sins Against Riverdale:

Sabrina Sin 1: Forced conversion under a situation of duress

They are down to a precious few hours to resurrect the dead, and the first thing Sabrina makes everyone do is convert to a new religion. They have to do a bunch of things - sign a document, chant a chant, do a dance. All while the confirmed actual witches wink and smile at each other like creeps. By the way, the conversion ritual is done in common speech, but I will note that Sabrina also uses Latin for her spells! The ones that count!

However, the ceremony looked like a lot of fun and the Catholic Church could take some notes.

Sabrina Sin 2: Give incomplete information

Sabrina forced desperate people to convert to her religion, then tells them only in implication that there are OTHER ways beyond the thing she wants to do first, for her own personal reasons.

She also only explains that the dead have to WANT TO return only after they have Jughead out of the freezer and on their ceremonial table. Except, of course, this also turns out to be a bald-faced lie.

Sabrina Sin 3: Sabrina doesn’t have to pick the body of a person she finds fuckable as the test subject to bring back from the dead as the No 1. candidate. But she picks Jughead on the basis of finding him more fuckable than Archie. (Given that they’ve left a baby behind, shouldn’t Fangs or Toni be the first one she picks, you know, for humanitarian reasons??)

Sabrina Sin 4: Sabrina does not need to be the one to go, at all, to persuade the almost-completely-dead to return. She has no connection to Jughead (or anyone) but she insists on going so she can fuck her boyfriend using Jughead’s reanimated corpse.

The truncated bits of information she delivers is passive-aggresively designed to dissuade Jughead from coming back to life, more than anything else. This is a complete nonstarter, to say to someone who is in some version of heaven, Come Back and Fight a Terrible Battle.

Jughead turns out to be aware he is dead and in heaven and to have a memory of his own death which he recalls with pain. To be fair, Jughead’s death was the most terrifying - he was absolutely alone, underground and afraid and in pain. Jughead also has retained all of his memories, including the fact that Tabitha told him they are overwhelmingly likely to lose.

Jughead also mentions as a passing point, almost, that he can hear in heaven. Which means being unable to hear had persistently been upsetting him while alive, even though he did not ever, ever complain about it, to anyone, Tabitha included. After a childhood in which those he loved most barely ever noticed his very serious troubles and pains, he just carries this behavior of being completely silent about his misery into his adult life. He’s a very heartbreaking character, if you ever take a breath to think about it.

Sabrina really does not try, at all, whatsoever. In some ways, she CAN’T because doesn’t KNOW any of these people, and in fact never bothered to ask key questions before she made the leap into the supernatural. She did not bother to ask Tabitha or Betty or Veronica or Cheryl (Jughead’s current VIP, former VIP, and people who’ve known him the longest) what would be motivating factors to bring up to Jughead to get him to leave heaven.

I can only conclude that Sabrina never intended to succeed in bringing Jughead back, and she only pretended to come up with this idea of fucking Jughead’s body at the last minute, even to Jughead.

By the way, getting Riverdale information initially through fandom Tumblrs can be a very confusing experience. I saw the gifs about this episode weeks ago, and you know, anti-Jabithas did some bad faith editing there. Jughead does say about Tabitha, “I do hope to see her soon,” but that’s where the gifset ended. They left out the smirkily joking context of the rest of the scene, because Jughead immediately adds: “NOT TO SOON THOUGH.”

While all that is going on, Kevin is being mind-invaded by Percival. Kevin’s touchstones to sanity are - his childhood friendship with Betty and Veronica in S1 before it fell apart (this is very honest of the show), the brief moment of domestic cohesion with Toni and Fangs in S5 before that fell apart, and the one time he dressed up in a beehive wig with a full face of make-up during the Hedwig episode. He asks to be killed instead.

Anyhoo.

We are back at Thornhill where Sabrina walks out of the portal with the reanimated Jughead corpse. Tabitha is elated to see Jughead, runs into his arms, says how much she missed him.

The fact that Betty has absolutely nothing to say is a little shocking to me, but we’ll let that go. ( No we won’t, actually. I mean! It seems so out of character! Does Betty now hate Jughead? But how is that possible?? It’s only when Nick says “What’s up ladies?” that Betty snarkily comments that it can’t be Jughead - why? Because he talks to women? But Jughead has never been shy or incompetent at wooing women, ever. It’s MEN’s romantic attentions he has a hard time with. What the heck?)

Sabrina Sin 5: Sabrina the asshole smiles with inappropriate glee as she tells Jughead’s girlfriend and buddies that she’s inserted her own boyfriend’s soul into Jughead’s body. Tabitha is both tearful and furious. She says all the right things - You stole his body?? - and the suddenly super articulate Sabrina has all the answers lined up. It’s understandable that Jughead didn’t want to leave heaven! She “borrowed” his body “with Jughead’s consent” because we are not in a Wonder Woman movie!

Sabrina Sin 6: Sabrina does not say she needs Nick there to do what she should have done to begin with - send in people who have an actual emotional connection with the dead to try to get them to come back. This only proves that the entire shenanigans about shoving Nick Scratch into Jughead’s body after deciding Jughead’s corpse is cuter than Archie’s was just a way to get a warm sex toy.

Because Sabrina has this unfair advantage of power and knowledge, none of the new witches dares to question her for wasting ALL THIS TIME in doing this bullshit with the Jughead corpse.

I suppooooose you could say that Sabrina had to do this magic trick bit with reanimating Jughead’s corpse with her boyfriend’s soul so that she could get the buy in from the rest to temporarily die in order to visit the Sweet Hereafter to get their people back, but I still say that’s a post-facto justification and not persuasive. These women were willing to call in a necromancer, and dance to the goddess Hecate and do all this other stuff, so she could’ve probably persuaded them without getting herself this nice bonus. And wasting time (I cannot emphasize this enough).

At this point though, I started to find this entire thing kind of funny. Jughead has officially the most desirable body in Riverdale. Like, literally the most attractive and the most fuckable, even 60 hours after death, chilling in a freezer. Not Archie of the Abs and the Square Jaw. Not Fangs, also of the Abs and Long Lashes. It’s Jughead.

Then the two best people in Riverdale - who are a) Cheryl and b) Veronica - agree to die temporarily so that they can, respectively, retrieve an ex girlfriend who married a man and that man, and an ex boyfriend who cheated on her with her best friend from high school after the two of them flaunted their relationship in her face so much that she had a minor nervous breakdown at someone else’s rehearsal dinner. Oh and Cheryl will go in for Dagwood and her Nana as well. Betty can’t go because she is confirmed by Nick Scratch on sight to be the Whore of Babylon.

Maybe you needed to be a CAOS viewer, but the degree to which Sabrina completely accepts her boyfriend’s conclusion without question struck me as very odd.

So Sabrina is going to summon Charon to do the crossing over. Betty is the one that nudges Veronica into dying for Archie. It’s a form of full circle, I suppose - Veronica once gulped down a goblet of poison for Betty, so she might as well be a full service third wheel.(I hate this place. Please let me out.)

Percival demands that Reggie execute Kevin, in exchange for giving Kevin’s heart to Reggie’s ailing father. Reggie’s reaction - adorably appalled - and his reason (he and Kevin go all the way back to “rugrat” days) were a balm given how much pain I was in about Veronica at this moment.

Then we get to a truly wonderful part of this episode (sincere!). The three best girls of Riverdale (Tabitha, Cheryl and Veronica) are lying on the floor, ready to die. Veronica is worried about it hurting, but Cheryl, truly faithful, is “excited” to be able to say she died and came back. Veronica lets the air out of her sails by saying, not incorrectly, that a lot of people can say that in Riverdale.

Nick Scratch has to use an English language incantation, but so far, out of everyone who has done one of these, he gives it the due weight and seriousness of an actual magic spell. Or maybe this is an innate Jughead ability that Nick Scratch is making the most of. Jughead had such a good time using the formalist portentous language of the G&G game back in the day after all.

Then Sabrina summons Charon with another English language doggerel poem.

AND CHARON APPEARS and we are in an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer from the 1990s. Like TOTALLY this is a Buffy episode! I’m so into it now! The red glowing eyes of Charon (no face to minimize special effects costs), the dorkily choreographed way he moves, the magic trick of collecting the coins on the girls’ eyes without touching them, the twinkly music, the very basic fog effect, and the fact that the ‘dead souls’ are expressed as glowing technicolor versions of the girls - just SO BUFFY. It’s so FUN!! Betty and Heather are appropriately creeped out by Charon. I LOVE that little performance detail Betty has where she just does not want to make eye contact with Charon.

When the souls of the three brave girls leave for the beyond, Betty as The Responsible One asks what should happen next, and Sabrina puts her and Heather on guard duty. Then Sabrina and Jughead as occupied by Nick Scratch smirk at each other about ‘going on a date’ and get a TERRIFIC nasty look from Betty. (I love Lili Reinhart so much- she makes really fun decisions about how Betty reacts to any outlandish scenario.)

Veronica, in Archie’s heaven, lives right down the street and comes over only rarely. Archie is living in a version of heaven where he won the war and then died. This seems slightly different from the heaven Jughead was occupying during Sabrina’s visit. Veronica says to a very stubborn Archie, who doesn’t want to leave his heaven, that he’ll “do the right thing,” not least because the Real Betty is still on the mortal plane, needing his help. Dream Betty comes home. Dream Betty cooks and is able to offer to set out an extra plate at her table on a whim. Dream Betty and Archie’s ideal Veronica are most definitely not best friends, definitely not B&V. Dream Betty will look at a clearly rather upset Veronica, smile at her like a robot and blandly say “It’s nice to see you” before breezing off.

I kind of hate Archie.

In Toni and Fang’s dream world, they’ve stayed married for however old this tall muscular curly-haired Baby Anthony is supposed to be. Very straight looking. But! Their son grew up gay (or bi, unclear). The level of unnecessary ambiguity they’ve built into his coming out about who he wants to marry is annoying. He wants to marry Twyla Twyst’s son Timmy. When his parents act overjoyed at this announcement, No-Longer Baby Anthony says, joyfully relieved, that he wasn’t sure how they were going to take the news.

Why? Because they are going to become in-laws with the Ghoulie leader who once cooperated with Percival to kidnap Anthony? Or because he thinks his parents are straight married people who are uncomfortable with gayness? (But how can that be? Toni and Fang’s generation of Serpents could barely scrape together a single straight person.)

Cheryl comes bursting into their domestic bliss with a very loud record scratch sound. She should’ve gotten her slowmo entrance with a hair whip, but I suppose Sabrina wasted too much time up front for that.

Cheryl is a trooper. Or maybe she doesn’t pick up on this but in Toni and Fang’s joint heaven, Cheryl is a vile evil person, permanently left out in the cold as all the straights and bis get straight married and leave her resentful gay ass behind. Fangs says that in his version of heaven, Cheryl was a person who tried to sabotage her brother’s marriage to Polly, and also tried to sabotage Toni’s marriage to Fangs. Cheryl advises Toni to search her “mother’s heart” for the truth, then leaves forthwith.

When Tabitha bursts in on Jughead’s heaven, the sound track plays the song Guardian Angel. Yes OK, we get it.

Jughead’s heaven has grown to include more people than when Sabrina visited earlier in the day. He now has fawning fans, and I must say, rather adorably Jughead fawns right back at them. In particular he is given the proper fan freak out moment by a lanky kid who is obsessed with his works, sounds lonely, and says that not only did Jughead’s work get him through tough times, Jughead’s imaginary characters are really friends to him. To this last part, Jughead says, Yeah, Me Too.

(Is this a wink wink nudge nudge commentary about the fact that Jughead is The Narrator?)

Jughead’s heaven does not have any meaningful intimate relationships, which is very interesting. Is Jughead’s heaven one where he’s asexual? Or is it that he’s less controlling and prone to delusion as Archie - Jughead isn’t going to do anyone the injustice of inventing a false version of themselves to be his personal Barbie. He wants to eventually spend eternity with Tabitha, but will wait for the real Tabitha instead of inventing one (unlike Archie and his Dream Betty).

Tabitha also finds Jughead’s joy in having someone give him positive feedback too adorable to interfere with, so she decides to let him enjoy himself. Immediately after seating herself at the counter, she is greeted by the Angel Raphael from RiverVale, who wants to tell her some things. We don’t get to hear what they are.

Meanwhile, Cheryl walks into someone’s heaven. It has Polly married to Jason, Nana Rose is still alive, and Dagwood is buddies with his father whom he’s never met in real life.

Did Polly Cooper want to be married to Jason and be mistress of Thornhill (with the Parentdale generation of Blossoms long dead and forgotten?)?

Is this Jason’s heaven? It can’t be, because Jason has nothing to say in this heaven either.

Does Dagwood, as a minor, get to choose his heaven? If so, is Dagwood’s heaven one in which he is not a twin and is an only child to boot?

And Nana Blossom - I’m not sure what Nana Blossom’s heaven would be (being courted by smarmy young men armed with red roses a la Reggie, perhaps) - but being the great grandma in this sort of setting hardly fits the Nana Rose we’ve seen to date.

IF this is Jason’s heaven as well then he shares a weird code with Dagwood - because in this world, Cheryl does not live at Thornhill and is also an infrequent visitor, given the way Polly greets Cheryl (“Cheryl! [big pause, then, hesitantly] We weren’t expecting you!”). Why are all these het people so gross and refuse to appreciate Cheryl?

By the way, to the right of this cute /creepy family tableau, there is a decapitated baby doll’s head on a side table next to the blank easel in the living room. Just FYI.

What Polly tells Cheryl makes me wonder if this isn’t somehow Cheryl’s heaven. The maple business is booming, trees are swollen with sap, and Polly is going to have a triplet of Blossoms, so now there will be 5 little Jason progeny running around. Because Cheryl’s heaven is - now that I think of it - to get out of Thornhill but have it prosper and be allowed to visit whenever she wants.

But since Polly is the one doing all of the talking, the most reasonable conclusion is that this is Polly’s heaven. (Jason too, likely wanted to escape Thornhill, not be master of it.). This makes me think very different thoughts about Polly than before.

Polly the Dead invites Cheryl the Living into staying in Polly’s Heaven forever, but even though Cheryl is so pleased by this vision and what it gives her, she doesn’t fall for it.

Then we cut to Jughead the Possessed on a date with Sabrina the Asshole. I am going to assume that this is a post coitus meal.

Sabrina confesses that her taking Jughead’s corpse specifically so she could fuck her dead boyfriend with it was absolutely a deliberate choice made out of pure opportunism, without a single care that this was wasting the time of people who counted on her to help them prevent The Apocalypse. She even suggests that they abscond with Jughead’s corpse to live in a cabin somewhere.

Was the intention of introducing this character supposed to result in my despising her? Is she meant to be a villain? But she’s not being treated like one in the text.

Nick is an asshole just like his girlfriend so they only talk about their own interests. She weeps about whatever situation they are in, and I have no idea what she’s talking about and I frankly don’t care because she’s a dick. I’m glad she doesn’t get what she wants. Who the fuck are you and why are you in my show?

Then Sabrina Spellman kisses Jughead Jones’ corpse on the mouth and I got my first taste of what it might be like to be a diehard Barchie or Bughead watching the other ship’s scenes. I HATE THIS! PUT IT AWAY.

Back at the casino, the Mantle men are having dinner. Reggie gets his father’s absolute approval for the first time ever. Then the worm turns and his father tells Reggie that he knows he’s dying. Reggie, at this point, is completely willing to kill Kevin for his father.

Reggie’s father says that even though he failed at business, marriage and fatherhood, he wants to die with honor.

OK. Three things.

One - I don’t know about the word choice of HONOR here because I just get the heebie jeebies when English language programming give Asian people any line that mentions the word HONOR. (Nobody in contemporary Asia talks like this and in the East Asian self imagination of the past they also do not have people prattle on about HONOR. This is a white stereotype of Asian people all smooshed together and it’s always completely shit. Yes, I am the authority on this. Accept it.)

Two - That said, Jughead sneering at him during his early Serpent membership days that Reggie doesn’t know what “honor” is provoked Reggie into trying to punch Jughead in the face, so nice callback, I guess?

Third, Marty Mantle is selfish to the very last. His personal desire to ‘die with honor’ is so unhelpful to Reggie, and doesn’t ameliorate any of the failures of his life or what he did to Reggie as a child. He just wants this last vanity for himself. I reject this redemption arc attempt for Marty Mantle. Plus this is very gendered of me probably, but I much prefer that men stay alive and live long to do the dishes and change the diapers and wash the windows than ‘die with honor’ in some stupid glorious annihilation. Please stay alive and scrub the toilet bowl.

At the morgue, Sabrina and Nick say solemn farewells to each other while little birds come to watch. Sabrina sexually molests Jughead Jones’s corpse a second time before Nick Scratch eases back into the land of the dead. They play very obtrusive sad piano music over this but I’m repelled and confused. Would it have been impossible to give us a very small short exposition dump about who the hell these people are and what is going on via Heather?

The sourness of this scene is immediately washed away though by the very next scene.

Reggie, in his lonely big luxury bedroom that he stole from Veronica using the help of the devil (I love Riverdale) cries out, ‘What the hell am I supposed to do?’ about his father’s unknowing rejection of the plan to harvest Kevin’s heart for a transplant. He’s immediately answered by his own voice emanating from the Reggie Puppet. Reggie’s conscience is much more intelligent than his normal self but the thing is, I am inclined to think that Reggie’s conscience refuses to cohabit with Reggie in his body. Reggie’s conscience works via Puppet Zoom.

Reggie’s distant relationship with his conscience is shown by his calling it “Bro.” Riverdale is brilliant.

Reggie says that this is Percival testing him, and is advised by his own conscience that the best course of action is to skip town with the whole test - Kevin, his Dad, himself.

Sabrina comes back to Thornhill, where again, nobody is asking about the Cheryl-with-A Fox’s-Head self portrait given absolute pride of place. She asks, not very interested, on how they all made out with the highly dangerous mission to the Sweet Hereafter. (The show also skimps out on telling us how they got back. I wanted to see Charon bring them back.)

Betty, the one who wasn’t Good (™) enough to even get to visit, is the one who loudly blares out that everyone failed. This is very in character for Betty. She’s annoyed at everyone else’s failure. Cheryl adds that ‘some’ of them were hostile (meaning Fangs, mostly).

I want to punch Sabrina in her perfect pretty face for the way she smirks at Tabitha as she asks if Tabitha managed to “pull at Jughead’s heartstrings.” Oh. My God. You bitch. I don’t know what happened to you on your show, but I’m glad your boyfriend is dead and you have Aunties who did whatever it was that made you cry.

Tabitha says she just could not bring herself to ask Jughead to come back, to pull at those heartstrings. Jabitha are fascinating - it’s sort of what happens when two too-good people, used to sacrifice and duty, get together. Tabitha cannot bring herself to insist that her happy boyfriend come back to life, especially because she told him the truth about the overwhelming number of realities in which their mission fails and he dies.

Betty decides that everyone who doesn’t want to do what she needs them to do is crazy, and she’s backed up by Veronica who decides that the best thing to do in the face of resistance against what she thinks is right is to use brute force.

So, Sabrina, playing hide the ball TO THE LAST, finally reveals that Cheryl has the power of the phoenix and can summarily yank people back from the dead.

Cheryl, going from reclining to gesticulating, is delightful. She asks what the hell the Power of the Phoenix is. Even though Heather wasn’t allowed to give us the Sabrina-and-Nick exposition dump, she unhelpfully gives the useless definition of what a phoenix is. (Did Cheryl really not know?).

This is coo-coo bananas. But I’m also kind of feeling it.

You said it Cheryl.

Heather finally lays out what the risks are: Souls might return incomplete! Infected with malignancy! And will (she says MIGHT but actually it’s WILL) resent you for the rest of their (un)natural lives! (Just like Buffy did, when she revealed she’d been in heaven to her necromancer witch friend in the musical episode!)

Betty seems to do a quick calculation of who has died, and she’s very indifferent to most of their potential resentment and further seems to trust that Archie probably won’t resent her. (Whatever Toni, Fangs, Dagwood and Jughead might feel about anything is of no interest to her whatsoever.) Tabitha, the only one armed with real information about the potential futures, says that they really don’t have a lot of choice, because the worst is “yet to come.”

Cheryl is the best person in Riverdale. She really is. She’s told by Sabrina the Asshole that she has to burn all the corpses so that they may HOPEFULLY rise from the ashes. This thesis is untested then. AND she has to do it all alone, and given the hostile presence of people like Betty, take on all the blame if it fails. But she steps up and says she’ll do it in the mines without hesitation.

Reggie’s escape plan does not quite work. Reggie, Kevin and Marty are caught before they even gets to leave the building. Percival is not surprised, but is disappointed by Reginald.

Cheryl is not as good as Jughead’s corpse in reciting an incantation, but the spell works anyway.

To let the audience know that at minimum, Archie will not resent Betty and Toni will not resent Cheryl, we are briefly shown that Archie was willing to come back to “Fight the War” and Toni came to the realization that her reality in heaven was a fabrication. Whoever constructed the Toni-Fangs heaven did a shitty job. They didn’t bother making up any further photos for the photo album!

As their corpses magically burn, the heaven-selves start to heat up. Jughead is not given any chance to have a change of heart about coming back alive. He’s going to be the only one yanked out of a perfect-for-him heaven in which he was perfectly happy to be resurrected in a reality in which he knows he is overwhelmingly likely to suffer a SECOND miserable death in his twenties.

We get a Harry Potter fiery phoenix CGI effect to prove that the spell worked, after which we are shown Jughead, Dagwood, Nana Rose, Toni, Fangs and Archie walking out whole and hale from the blue flames.

Sabrina is walked out of Thornhill by Cheryl looking gorgeous in a red dress. What Sabrina does next puts the final nail in my I Hate Sabrina Spellman casket. Sabrina tells Cheryl to “just be careful” which is a slap-buying offense for being fucking vaguefor something as serious as upsetting Death. Sabrina didn’t give the warning for the potential risks for the spell caster before the spell was cast, and doesn’t give a proper explanation for what the risks are now that she’s taken the risk.

Jughead is silent in his misery as he always is, and this time his pain is about being brought back to corporeal life on the mortal plane. In very gentle, kind tones, Tabitha tearfully explains that he had to come back to the cold miserable reality of actual life in order to fight off the apocalypse. Then, because she’s Jughead-coded Tabitha says secondly that she wanted her boyfriend to not be dead because she loves him.

It turns out Jughead can hear AND read thoughts. He says that this ‘cushions the blow.’ Which means it had REALLY been bothering him but he never spoke of the misery his hearing loss gave him.

I’m worried that Jabitha are going to self-abnegate into oblivion. And maybe this has to do with fitting into camera angles, but Tabitha is developing the same terrible hunched posture as Jughead.

At Thornhill, Heather asks Cheryl how things really were in the Sweet Hereafter. This suddenly made me a huge fan of Heather. Heather understands that there is a public and private Cheryl, and also that access to the private Cheryl requires a soft touch, to be made in utmost confidence and discretion.

Cheryl admits that she was pained to see her family happy without her, but that she took matters into her own hands. Cheryl resurrected Polly, Jason and Dagwood! As Heather looks very freaked out, Polly and Cheryl smile creepily at each other. Polly came back wrong, right? Right?

Betty and Archie are cuddling, because Archie is given lead boy cushioning and went from being with Dream Betty to Actual Betty. Betty is a smartie and laughs at the very dumb choices that Archie made in heaven to name their kids Polly and Fred. The show is not as vicious to Archie as it is to Jughead, but it is unkind. Archie is not very talented at music from the point of view of a teacher who doesn’t want to molest him and he didn’t have very good boxing skills from the point of view of a coach who knows the sport, and in his heaven he picked names for his dream children that his living actual girlfriend thinks are uncreative, because he’s just not smart.

Tabitha checks in on Veronica. Veronica is given not great news that she could be Endgame with Archie in the same percentage as Barchie being endgame. Um. Tabitha says as a conclusion that Veronica’s future is ‘up for grabs.’ Which could mean I dunno JERONICA endgame or VEGGIE endgame just as well but oh man.

Why is Veronica not more upset about what has happened with the casino?

In the vault of the casino Kevin Keller’s father has abandoned Kevin to be executed by Percival in the morning. I mean, the Mantles are in there too but wow that is COLD. Reggie turns out to have a magic knife in his possession. He’s determined to kill Percival.

Tabitha is doing the rounds. She checks in on Toni and Fangs. My general impression of that apartment is it being dank and dark, but with Tabitha there it’s revealed to be a bright yellow interior, with flowering hanging plants. Is this the magic of Tabitha?

Fangs, by the way, still has not touched Baby Anthony. He and Toni are seated next to the crib staring at the baby, but he doesn’t touch him. At all. What gives??

Tabitha tells them that Baby Anthony is immortal. Then she announces that she is Riverdale’s guardian angel. She is lit like the Virgin Mary in Renaissance paintings as she says this.

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themculibrary · 1 year

Text

Songfic Masterlist

A groovy kind of love (ao3) - S_Horne steve/tony G, 974

Summary: Slow dancing in the kitchen after a hard day at work

All Too Well (Druig & Makkari) (ao3) - camihearts druig/makkari T, 2k

Summary: All Too Well (Taylor’s Version) but make it Druig and Makkari.

Another Love (ao3) - evieeden bruce/natasha M, 1k

Summary: Bruce didn't want to hurt Natasha, but the shadow of Betty was always on his mind.

Dreaming 'Bout The Day (ao3) - tellxmebby steve/tony T, 3k

Summary: Tony/Steve Highschool AU fic based on Taylor Swift's music video "You Belong With Me".

I'll Be the One (ao3) - ConjureUpaSmile steve/tony T, 2k

Summary: “It’s been eight days, Steve.” Tony hardly recognized his own voice as he spoke to the unconscious man. He tried clearing his throat, but the roughness didn’t dissipate. Instead, he began humming. Honestly, he was slightly embarrassed that he even remembered the tune, let alone all the words. It was the song that his father would sing as he searched his Arctic Ocean for Steve’s lifeless body.

“Say something, I’m giving up on you.”

-----

Post-Civil War pseudo-songfic where Tony has a tough decision to make and it doesn't look like Steve is going to make that decision any easier.

It Felt Like Home Somehow (ao3) - orlandoblueberry wanda/vision G, 5k

Summary: After a dinner where the Avengers all come out as Taylor Swift fans, Vision seeks Wanda’s help to understand the appeal of this kind of music. Romance ensues, obviously.

I've Got a Pal in Kalamazoo (ao3) - clokkerfoot steve/bucky G, 1k

Summary: Steve likes the old swing music from the 40s. Bucky doesn’t. But there’s one song that never fails to put Bucky in a good mood, especially when Steve starts singing it in the shower at 4AM.

I was Born Sick (ao3) - HepG2 steve/tony E, 17k

Summary: For all the genius he was, it certainly took Tony a while to learn of this... "sickness" within. He'd liked them on the same team and that wasn't normal. He could fight this, cure this! So he hid, rebelled. First he removed Steve out of the equation. Then he drowned himself in liquor and sex. Just, Steve wouldn't leave him alone. And that made it so much worse. Inspired by Hozier's "Take Me to Church".

Weakly Tony rose, his chin tilted upwards as he claimed Steve’s lips with his. He held onto the warmth, onto the memory. Let him have this. Let him remember the gentle brush of their kiss, the passing breath on his skin.

“You can’t love me, Tony.”

“And you can’t stop me.”

Planets (ao3) - ozhawk jane/thor G, 842

Summary: Thor and Jane songfic to Planets by Short Stack

St. James Ballroom (ao3) - FandomLife54 steve/bucky G, 2k

Summary: Steve is dreaming that he's back in one of the old dance halls in Brooklyn, except Bucky's there and he's asking Steve to dance. Fear-stricken, Steve think's Bucky's insane but he must be, too, because he wants nothing more than to say yes.

“You’re asking me to dance?” His heart skips a beat, fingers twitching at his side.

Bucky snorts. “Well, yeah, that’s what we’ve been practicing all week for.”

“All week...?” Steve squints, his mind foggy. “No, we…” What did they do that week? Steve takes a glimpse around, searching for a clue, when reality drops his stomach from under him. A wave of dread rolls through him, the happy atmosphere oblivious to his mental break. “We practiced so you could come dance with dames. Not me. We- we can’t, Buck, you know that.”

Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch (ao3) - j_gabrielle steve/tony G, 368

Summary: Steve wiggles his eyebrows. Tony frowns, but the corner of his lips are ticking upwards.

The Way I Loved You (ao3) - agayturtle wanda/natasha T, 3k

Summary: “It’s 2am and I’m cursing your name…”

Wanda and Natasha’s relationship didn’t last longer than a couple of months, but Natasha can’t help but wonder if they made the right choice when they ended things.

or The Way I Loved You by Taylor Swift but it’s Wandanat.

The World Don't Stop (It's On Again) (ao3) - AngeNoir steve/tony G, 2k

Summary: Tony's used to people - reporters, politicians, internet blogs - deriding him for his faults, because he is less than the hero ideal that came before him. Because he is less than Captain America.

Steve's used to people asking if he's fine, and he's gotten pretty good at lying. He's Captain America, isn't he?

Between the two of them, they know they never became heroes for what people said about them. And that will be enough.

Tie A Yellow Ribbon 'Round the Ole Oak Tree (ao3) - SylntSilver steve/bucky E, 5k

Summary: Bucky is honorably discharged from the war and is on his way home. He is not sure what his reception will be after three years, so in his last letter to Steve, he asked his friend for a favor.

Waiting for Superman (ao3) - CantansAvis clint/natasha T, 2k

Summary: Clint’s missing; but he isn’t the one waiting for Superman.

#themculibrary #mcu #marvel #songfic #songfic masterlist #masterlists

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werewolfbansheelove · 3 months

Text

Mash Up (Football + Will Sets)

Emma and Ken approach Will in the teachers' lounge.

Will: Hey, guys.

Ken: We need to talk.

Will: Okay.

Ken: As you know, even though she refuses to wear the ring and won’t tell anyone including her mother... about the engagement, Emma and I are, in fact, getting married.

Emma: Yes. Ken convinced me we need to at least be in the same room when the marriage is certified.

Ken: What can I say? I’m a traditionalist. We’re going to Hawaii and getting married on the beach.

Will: And you want me to come?

Emma: No, no, no, no. I picked Hawaii, because it’s far away from everybody we know.

Will realized. Will: Oh.

Emma: Uh, the thing is-is that after a very brief, private ceremony Ken has decided he would like to have a first dance.

Ken: The problem is, we can’t decide on the song.

Emma: Yes. I would like to have “I Could’ve Danced All Night”.

Will: Oh, from My Fair Lady. (Emma smiles) Great choice. Such a romantic song.

Emma: Yes.

Ken: Yeah, if you’re making a mixed tape for the boring parade. I want the “Thong Song”. (Will was stunned) I need something I can shake my moneymaker to.

Emma: Um. Uh, I was remembering, um, that you did those, uh mash-up things with the Glee kids, right? (Will: Uh-huh.) So I thought maybe you could find a way to use both of our songs. Um, and I... well, we both need/want/need dance lessons.

Ken: Yeah, l-l...I mean, I might need a bit of polishing but it's the Emster here you really have to work with. Had a monster case of athlete's foot a couple years back. Had to get all my toenails removed. So if she steps on my feet during the dance, I might pass out.

Emma: We would, uh, be very happy to pay you for your time, Will.

Will: No. No, I want to give you these lessons as a wedding gift. Sound good?

Emma + Ken: Hmm!

——–

Finn and Quinn visit Emma and ask her for advice.

Emma: So, how can I, uh... how can I help you kids? Is it, uh, too many friends on MySpace, or...

Quinn: I can’t believe we’re saying this but we need some advice on how to be cool.

Finn: Yeah, you must have picked up some ideas about what cool people do from watching them over the years. (Noticing the look from Emma) Not that you were never cool yourself.

Emma: Yeah... Eh... Well, um.. But, um, you’re two of the most popular kids in school.

Quinn: We were until we joined Glee Club. That’s why he got a Slushee facial. I’m sure of it.

Emma: Okay. I see. Um, don’t really have any pamphlets on how to be popular. Uh, okay, right. Well, let’s talk about this. Why is it so important for you to be cool? Huh? Don’t you like being in Glee? It’s fun.

Quinn: Status is like currency. When your bank account is full you can get away with doing just about anything. But right now, we’re like toxic assets. When my mom applied to college she put being popular as her main extracurricular activity. And she got into Arizona State.

But while Quinn was talking, Emma, however, gets distracted by Will passing by wearing sunglasses.

Emma (whispering): Sunglasses are so sexy. (Then out loud) Sunglasses. Yeah, sunglasses are, um, really, really cool. I’m always seeing celebrities wear them in magazines, even at night. Doesn’t need to be day. Very popular. Gives you a sense of mystery. You know rappers.

Finn (smiling big): Totally. You can’t see their eyes, so they have all the power. (Emma: Mmm!) I could be looking at your boobs, and you’d have no idea.

That earned him a hit from Quinn on his arm.

Emma: No. Um, no. Kids, look. The most important thing is that you be yourselves. Okay, and if people don’t like you for that, then I’m sorry, but who needs 'em.

——–

Emma visits Will after school in one of the classroom in a wedding dress with puffy shoulders and a long train.

Will: Hi.

Emma: Hi. Hmm. This is my Cousin Betty's. We were obsessed with Princess Di's dress when we were little girls so, um, when she got married she insisted on having this, uh this long train.

Which it definitely was a long train.

Will: Is there a reason you... have it on now?

Emma: Yes, yes.

Will: Okay. He waited for the explanation.

Emma: Yeah. Um, she didn’t wear it to her dance rehearsals and the night of the wedding her husband kept stepping on the train. It was really bad. Their fight was epic. (Will: Ooh.) The priest cried. They were divorced three months later. Actually, maybe I shouldn’t wear it.

Emma went to leave but Will stopped her.

Will: No, no, no, no, no! It’s all good. It’s all good. We’ll, uh... We’ll see how you move in it. Right?

Emma: Okay.

Will: Okay. Um, so first, uh, let’s do Ken's selection and then, uh, we’ll work in your song for the big finish. Okay.

Will: All right? Hey, Emma I’m really excited about this.

Emma was enchanted by the man who went to play the Thong song.

Emma: Fantastic. It’s... so, so exciting.

Will turns on Thong Song and begins to dance provocatively around Emma. The performance ends when Will accidentally trips and Emma falls on top of him.

Emma: Good God! Are you okay?

Will: I’m okay. Are you?

Emma: Oh, yes!

The two chuckled.

Emma: It’s the darn "Thong Song."

Will laughs: I don’t think it’s the song. I think you need a new dress.

Will: Come on. Upsy-daisy.

Emma: Oh, I’m stuck.

The two doesn’t know that Ken was spying on them from outside the classroom.

—–—

At football practice Finn was running practice.

Finn: Let’s try, uh, reverse chair on two.

Azimio: Let’s not.

Finn: Hey, Azimio, I’m the quarterback. I call the plays.

Azimio: Some of the guys was talking, and we’re starting to question your leadership ability.

Football guy: Yeah, like maybe you’re having trouble making good choices as in, for instance, choosing to join homo explosion.

Finn: Do I need to remind you that Glee Club helped us win our first game of the season?

Azimio: What have you done for me lately?

Football guy: Yeah, we’re taking a bunch of heat, because you like kissing dudes all of a sudden. You’re not being a team player, man.

Azimio: Can’t believe you was man enough to knock up Quinn Fabray. You sure a real man didn’t sneak in there and do it for you?

Finn (snapped): That’s it!

Finn tackled Azimio to the ground and begins to fight. Ken comes in and breaks up the fighting and holds a team meeting.

Ken: Okay, break it up! Get up!

Football players: Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight!

Ken separated them up. Ken: Hey, calm down, everybody! On the sidelines and take a knee! Now!

They all took a knee on the sidelines. Ken: What if you had broken Finn’s arm, huh? We'd be worse off and more pathetic than we already are. Where’s Puckerman?

Finn: Uh, he said he had to miss practice today. He’s working on something for Glee Club.

Azimio: Is he working on his coming-out-of-the-closet speech or something? (Finn pushed him but Matt got in the middle of it. Azimio pushes him back) Hey, man! Don’t push me, man!

Ken: Okay, enough! Football is war and no one single man can win that war, not even if they strap nukes on him. I want you to start acting like a team again! When we won that one game, it wasn’t because we were dancing. It’s because we were of singular purpose. I want you to start hanging more, spend more time together. Which is why, starting next week I’m adding extra practice on Thursdays at 3:30.

Finn: But, Coach, that’s when Glee rehearses.

Ken: You know what? I have had it up to here with Schuester and Glee. Here’s the story, Quarterback and you tell Puckerman this when you see him. That practice is mandatory. No exceptions. So you’re going to have to choose what’s more important to you... football or Glee Club.

—–—

Finn and Quinn are walking down the hallway in sunglasses.

Finn: Huh! You know, I really think this is working. I think we look super cool.

Quinn: I’m proud of you, Finn. I’m proud of us.

Finn: Yeah. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be popular. It just means you want people to like you. I think that’s healthy.

Quinn: I totally agree.

Finn: Being popular just means you can have it all.

But Quinn and Finn were ambushed by the football team with slushies in hand.

Finn: Oh, hey, guys.

Azimio: You thirsty?

Finn: Sure. Thanks. (The football team and non team members threw slushies in Finn and Quinn’s faces.) You can’t do this!

Azimio: Oh, you think that’s bad? Just imagine what’s gonna happen if you don’t show up to practice on Thursday and quit that little Glee Club for good! Bros before hi-hos, dude. Don’t forget that.

—–——

Sue and Will perform a swing dance routine to Sing, Sing, Sing (With a Swing) in the choir room.

Will: Sue... Whoo! That was amazing. Oh! You know, I have to admit at first when you suggested that I teach you a few steps. I was hesitant. You know, cause how horrible you were to me and the Glee kids when Figgins made you co director.

Sue: Well, live and let learn, my friend. That is ultimately what I got to. It’s nice not being at each other's throats. You know, you’re right. I, Oh, gosh. I don’t know how else to say this, but I’m in love.

Will: Really?

Sue: After one date, Sue Sylvester is in love. Rod has invited me to the Second Annual Allen County Sickle-cell Anemia Dance-a-thon.

Will: Ooh.

Sue: With your tutelage, Will, we can take home that blue ribbon like two prize heifers in love.

Will: I was wondering why you asked for dance lessons.

Sue: Oh, well, Erma just raved about you.

Will: Sue, I’m, I’m actually touched. I mean, you seem so happy and... nice. And you’ve been so cool with Quinn Fabray and her, you know, situation.

Sue: Mmm, yeah, well, she’s just a confused kid and the least I can offer her is my compassion. But, you, mister... (Will chuckled.) The Sue Sylvester who has been obsessed with sabotaging your every move is now just a distant memory.

Will: That’s great, Sue.

Sue: Now all I feel for you is sympathy. Whether it be for your sham of a marriage or the fact that Coach Tanaka's finally laying down the law with regard to Glee Club.

Will (shocked): Wait. What?

Sue: Yeah. Tanaka-san's making the kids choose. Come on. Let’s be honest. What kid's gonna choose Glee Club over football? It’d be ridiculous.

—–—–

Will confronts Ken in the boys' locker room about this decision.

Will: Hey, Ken, you wanna tell me what the hell's goin' on? You know I had a standing Glee rehearsal on Thursday. We sat down and worked out a schedule when some of your guys joined the club.

Ken: Circumstances have changed. I have a serious morale issue with my team. It’s my responsibility to fix it. Sorry if me doing my job interferes with your club.

Will: Ken, we’ve known each other for years. Your commitment to football is about as long as your pants. You know, let’s get into what this is really about. You’re upset that I don’t like your song for your wedding mash-up and you’re right. It’s not my place to have an opinion.

Ken: Why don’t you just cut the crap, Will? You’re not that naive. This is not about a song. It’s about my fiance. You and I, the whole world, knows that I’m just a consolation prize to you. How do you think that makes me feel? Emma's totally into you. Emma is settling for me and I love her so much, I don’t care. But it doesn’t mean I appreciate you coming in with your Gene Kelly charm and gettin' high off of her fawning over you.

Will: I-I have never intentionally encouraged Emma. But I haven’t discouraged her either. You don’t have to worry about it anymore though. So, are we cool, and I’ll have my guys on Thursday again? 3:30?

Ken: So you keep your rehearsal. I’ll keep my practice. We’ll let the kids decide who’s first choice and who’s a consolation prize.

—–———

Will and Emma are at a bridal shop where Emma is trying on a new wedding dress that she feels will be easier to dance in.

Will: Are you ready yet? We’ve only got an hour for lunch, Emma.

Emma: It’s not like trying on a pair of jeans, Will.

Will: Well, it doesn't have to be perfect. We just have to see if you can dance in it.

Emma came out wearing a dress that could be a grace Kelly dress. Emma: Fits okay?

Will (amused): Yeah. Fits great.

Emma: Terrific. (Looking at her reflection.)

Will: Yeah, terrific. (Will thought she looked more then just terrific.) Uh, so, should we see if you can dance in it?

Emma: Okay.

Will: This is the instrumental version of your wedding song. You can sing along if you want to. It’ll help your footwork.

Will took Emma in his arms and started to dance.

Emma: I could have danced all night, I could have danced all night and still have begged for more. I could have spread my wings and done a thousand things I’ve never done before. I’ll never know what made it so exciting, why all at once my heart took flight. I only know when he began to dance with me I could have danced danced danced, all night...

The ending was Will holding Emma tilted backwards, Emma's feelings for Will are evidently clear, and are reinforced when the music stops and she is left standing.

Will: Yeah, you can dance in it. (He let Emma up who was gasping like she was love.) So, I gotta get goin' . Um, got the big showdown today at 3:30. and, uh I wanna make sure I’m there to support the kids, no matter what happens.

Emma (confused) : Wait, what showdown? I thought... I thought you and Sue had that last week.

Will: Eh... Between me and your fiance. Uh, Ken's told all the football players in Glee that they have to choose between the club and the team. Unless all the guys choose Glee, it looks like we won’t have enough members for sectionals.

Emma: Then Glee is over.

Will: I know. Wish me luck.

—–—–

Out on the field, Finn was in his uniform and everyone congratulate him.

#1: Hey, fella.

Finn: Hey, man.

#2: You made the right decision.

#3: What’s up, dude?

Finn looked at coach Tanaka.

Ken: Okay, let’s huddle up.

—–—–—

Will approached Finn on the field.

Will: Hey, Finn, wanna have a catch?

Finn: Sure.

Will: Go long.

The two passed the ball back and forth. Finn: I’m not coming back.

These are the moments, Finn. They’re the crossroads. They’re the ones you look back at when you get old and think "what if?"

Finn: I don’t buy that. I don’t think any one decision makes your life unless you accidentally invent some kind of zombie virus or something.

Will: No. You’re right. Life's a series of choices. Big combination of moments little ones that add up to big ones that create who you are. You’re lettin' other people make those choices for you, Finn. You’re letting them decide who you’re gonna be. (Will goes up to Finn.) People you’re not even gonna know in three years. People whose names you’re gonna forget when you run into them in the hardware store.

Finn: You don’t understand the kind of pressure I’m under.

Will: Yes, I do. Because of all the students I’ve ever had, you remind me the most of me. Come back to Glee, Finn. It’s where you belong.

—–———

Finn goes to meet Ken in the locker room.

Finn: Hey, Coach. Can I talk to you about something?

Ken: You got an itch down there or something?

Finn: What? No. Uh, I’m the quarterback, right? The leader.

Ken: Sure.

Finn: Well, all this stuff about having to choose between Glee and football is making it hard for me to lead. Leaders are supposed to see things that other guys don’t. Right? Like they can imagine a future where things are better. Like Thomas Jefferson or that kid from the Terminator movies. (Finn sits down in front of coach.) I see a future where it’s cool to be in Glee Club. Where you can play football and sing and dance and no one gets down on you for it. Where the more different you are the better.

I guess what I’m tryin' to say is I don’t wanna have to choose between them anymore. It’s not cool.

Ken(gets up and walks to the whiteboard.): Hey, about that Thursday practice. It’s, uh, canceled indefinitely. I got... stuff I gotta do that time. Laundry, things like that.

Finn (smiles): Oh. Sweet.

Ken: Finn. (He faces the adult.) Tell Puckerman and the other guys too, will you?

Finn: Sure. Thanks, Coach.

—––—–

Will was drinking it of a fountain until he heard.

Sue: Schuester!

Will: Yeah?

Sue: I’ll need to see that set list for sectionals after all. I want it on my desk warm from the laminator at 5:00 p.m and if it is one minute late, I will go to the animal shelter and get you a kitty cat. I will let you fall in love with that kitty cat. And then on some dark, cold night I will steal a way into your home and punch you in the face. (She begins to walk away.)

Will: Hey Sue.

Sure: What?

Will: Didn’t work out with Rod?

Sue: No, it did not. (Sue walked away from Will and came across Quinn.) Q, take off those sunglasses. I wanna look in your eyes when I give you this piece of business.(Quinn took them offm) You’re off the Cheerios. I can’t have a pregnant girl on my squad. You’re a disgrace.

Quinn begins to cry.

–—–—–

Will visits Emma in her office.

Will: Hey.

Emma: Hey.

Will: I wanted to talk to you about your wedding mash-up. I’ve been working really hard on it and I just can't get those two songs to go together.

Emma: Yeah. That’s because they don’t. We both know that. They’re both good songs though.

Will: Great ones. He goes to leave but Emma stops him.

Emma: Will, um, I just wanted to say, uh thank you for the dance lessons.

#transcript #glee

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