#idk maybe its cuz i just came
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I just took a photo and oh my god? I have a teeny tiny lil tdick?? It's so cute????
#idk maybe its cuz i just came#but im feeling super euphoric about this#like. kinda wish i had preT photos to compare#but its so much bigger than i remember#but its still soso small and cute#hehehe idk#im glad i decided to take that photo 🥰#hypnos meows into the void#just tboi thingz
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Come back home when you have some sense
You can throw your life away just not at my expense
You’re not the son I raised
#jhariah#this one just rawrrfrrr#and then uh another line thats like ‘tell me did you raise a man?’#nice#im just listening to the new album to cope with nasty sickness and feeling out of it#god this album is really good it has every emotion in there like this song for example just the part where they scream the chorus its like#hnnnghhh#hm some other moments from the album im liking a lot uhhh i love re: concerns a lot#the part where hes like reading off the complaints and then the part where hes just screaming and its like BAM BAM BAM BAAAM#sasuke is so good and the bit at the end where its like ‘i just want you to know im so so...’#like hes gonna say sorry but cant seem to say the word for whatever reason and i know nothing about sasuke#but i has to imagine the fan girlies are eating gravel over that one lol it gets me#and theres just that like spooky echoing afterwards#the intro to fire4fun goes SOOOOOOOO hard i was losing my shit its awesome#the entirety of trust ceremony is giving me big feelings but specifically that part towards the end where its all quiet and you hear#its like whistling i think? like a marching band is coming in maybe#but it also kinda sounds like nature too and idk i like got a little bit um magical at that part cuz i was driving down a big hill#and it had been raining but there was a clearing in the clouds and the sun was bright and like at this particular hill#you can just see everything like the land stretches for miles theres trees hills the river farms all that shit#and idk with the extreme stress and depression ive been feeling its hard to have these moments where life seems worth it#and its hard to really feel anything anymore or to feel in the moment but idk i was just going down that hill seeing everything and it was#very majestic so yeah that song is definitely gonna have the same effect as pin eye for me#which i must mention pin eye again its still OOOOGHH very good it came at a pretty good time for me#yeah basically this album is uhhhh whats keeping me somewhat grounded rn i recommend 👍
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long as fuck nails always painted with at least a clear coat club:
saiki kusuo
teruhashi kokomi
kaido shun
saiko metori
imu rifuta
nail biters club:
kuboyasu aren
yumehara chiyo
arisu makino
suzumiya hii
nendo riki
aiura mikoto (with fake nails over top)
(formerly) kaido shun
(formerly) toritsuka reita
(formerly) akechi touma
normal short nails 🙄:
hairo kineshi
mera chisato
satou hiroshi
toritsuka reita
akechi touma
#idk why i made this its just funny to me#i was just looking at how long my nails are rn and this came to mind#i think akechi bit his nails as a kid and then learned how much bacteria is there and snapped out of it so quick#ur gonna have to trust me on aiura cuz i just know.#she has to constantly resist the urge to bite off her press-ons but theyre a little tougher than normal nails so she still chews on em a li#kaido used to bite his nails BAD but he broke the habit a while after he started painting them#cuz swallowing nail polish constantly is really annoying and gross and DEFINITELY wasnt making him choke or anything noo shhh#im not rlly sure of my reasoning with toritsuka.. i just know#i couldn't decide for kusuke tbh cuz i feel like he just doesnt give a shit#but for him does that mean he would just let them grow out forever or that he would just bite them tf off ?#he would probably need short nails for all the hand work he does though so#maybe he maintains them normally but only for that reason#we all know he doesnt take care of himself so he wouldnt do it if he didnt need to#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#meows post
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does any other demiromantic (or arosepc doesnt rlly matter) feel like. extremely awful when they experience romantic attraction or is that just me.
#spacie spoinks#bruh#like. while im experiencing it i wish so badly that i wasnt 😭#i feel disgusted. is this what romantic repulsion is???#cuz like ill be experiencing all the lovey dovey stuff yk#''ooohb i wanna kiss dem oooh what if we help hands'' romantic crap but its like. anxiety inducing#like it feels awful??? is this normally how it feels?? i dont like it.#it like. doesnt feel right or natural and im assuming its b/c i just like?? barely feel it ever?? and thats why???#strange as hell.#i recently felt romantic attraction 2 someone (it has been 2 or 3 years since i last felt it) and it came on really strong for like#a week and that was like the worst week of my life#i couldnt think abt anything else but them like it wasnt even like. fantasies or anything just like.#the concept of them. my brain would just be like ''hey remember this guy''#I LIKE COULDNT SLEEP#HOW DO YOU PPL ENJOY THIS????#me; clutching my head for ~a week: AUUUGH!! THE PERSON!!! THE PERSON!!!!!#im so serious this is how it feels w/springtrap. hes like a blight on my psyche#the feelings have faded mostly i think. i think im normal abt them again (thank god)#its so strange. i think a romantic relationship would be fun but then i start feeling the feelings and its. awful.#so horrid#also like. im considering that maybe the relationship i would like some day isnt romantic but a qpr#idk. ive never been in any kind of serious relationship (never wanted 2 and have never been approached for it)#sometjing 2 think abt i guess?#anybeans. i tire.#hope i never experience that again#ik that like in 2-3 years ill be like: ''man. idk what past spacie was talking abt. would be nice 2 feel romantic attraction again''#NO SPACIE IT WONT!!! REMEMBER!!!!!! REMEMBER WHAT YOU WENT THRU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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If half alive has 1000 fans I am one of them. If half alive has 1 fan, I am that fan
#text#august rambles#this is brought to you by seeing someone's review for them. and saying they didn't like the ep because it was standard#and that now not yet was better but had a bunch of poor songs. some of them bad#they even said still feel wasn't good because it was appealing too much to 'teen angst'#anyway i couldn't read the rest i had to leave#it was too painful i like the music too much we viewed it from different standpoints ack#i see a lot of people saying half alive is knock off twenty one pilots and like i see what they're saying. they are similar but#why does that mean its a knock off. what if they are just similar. half alive is clearly doing they're own thing. they're not copying them#maybe. that is just what that band is good at doing! the same as twenty one pilots. just cuz twenty one pilots came first doesn't mean#they own the scene. (you can argue they're better at they're music but if you're gonna do that make sure you're comparing the early stuff)#anyway rant about this because. i really like half alive and just dsbkncjnvb you don't need to be a fan#you don't need to think they're awesome. you can have an opinion outside of mine#but please be nice. and remember. it's Your opinion it's not Truth. if you don't like the song. you don't like it#if you think the repetition is boring. its not for you. if the 'angst' is stupid. its not for you. if the song doesn't hold weight.#it's not for you. the artist wrote this. and worked with other people to publish it#clearly they cared and other people saw worth in it. and like!! the fact that they're not big name also means they Can't get away with like#stupid filler stuff. they don't have enough of a name they gotta impress#idk i care too much. i see things like this and im just. ugh. it feels pretentious#half alive
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THEY'RE FINALLY HERE OH MY FUCKING GOD
#petrotalk#VERMIS BY PLASTIBOO....#its finally home... after 4 months of waiting...#AND IT CAME THIS WEEK WITHOUT NOTICE because somehow they classified it as a “letter”#And they dont notify you about letter cuz ur supposed to find them in themailbox#and obviously two books didnt fit in my mailbox#so they brought it back to the office and just didnt. Notify me LMAO#But its insane that it came just this Monday and today i randomly decided to check in person with office to ask some questions#maybe to start the shipment search idk#AND THERE IT WAS#s fucking hyped about this I'm not norma
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i hope you're doing okay tonight.
#m0thz art#original art#doodle#artists on tumblr#emo#cuz of the style#i guess#idk if this actually counts as emo#ive always just called it that#its defos inspired by the classoc 2000s emo style so you know#anyway this is one of my favourite quotes#and i dont remember if i stole it or came up with it myself#i found a drawing from when i was like. 10 maybe with this quote on it so i genuinely dont know#i tried looking it up and for my 2 seconds of searching got nothing so#its a mystery
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Soulmate AUs are the number one way to make me insufferable ngl
#people never think about how any type of world where you have a way of knowing exactly who you are meant to be with would change everything#it raises SO many questions and no one ever thinks to answer them! how do we know these are soulmates in the romantic sense? are they truly#always correct? what is the history of soulmates? how does this affect casual relationships? is it considered wrong to date someone who isnt#your soulmate? and for specific aus like maybe you find your soulmate the first time you make skin to skin contact-#this would change so much societally. would people become much more stingy about touching or would people be (by our views) overly familiar#in the attempt to find their soulmate? same deal with the ones where it’s your first words this would result in so many weird and intricate#rituals for meeting new people#and this isn’t even getting into the massive amounts of amatonormativity that come with aus of this type#lots of time when reading them you can tell some of its coming from the author too but man. there’s no way people in these worlds wouldn���t b#eveb more insufferable about love than in the real world#idk i just finished a sm au and it was pretty good but at the end there was a throwaway line like. everybody knew your soulmate came before#everyone else. which made me see red cuz Yeah but also of course you’d have that pov in a world where soulmates are real!
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bc wwi was such a grand war & the first war rly fought w what we consider ‘modern machinery’, the max age of registration into the us army was temporarily raised to 45.. not moralizing js [jordan shrug.gif] what if all these temporal inconsistencies is just cuz they old as FUCK !!! & fr forgot
#yn.#i dont wanna sound like im moralizing over evil ppl but i think its interesting how a pimp was so sympathetic#to a nonblack audience#like pimping aint sympathetic to Me#maybe cuz i came up w girls who was frl tricked out & almost got caught up quite a few times#but pimp culture in the black communities is evil enough#that n idk no 25 year old that consider themselves a kid#least of all the prideful boor that was ldpdl#thats all. not playing apologetics. just curious
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:)
#WEEEEEE I DID IT#got earthbound on the Wii U in 2018 and I finally did it for real 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#i loved it such a cute game#I’m surprised how much easier it was going back to it#bc I struggled a lot my first two attempts lol#but omgggg it was so cute and great and heartwarming#my heart was kinda going thump thump during the giygas fight bc I was playing in the dark and it was scary lol#idk if I’m gonna play mother 1 cuz I heard it was really frustrating but maybe I’ll get to it someday!!!!#I’m just glad I finally played a good chunk of the mother series 😭😭😭#i gotta admit tho I still like mother 3 a bit better#bc I felt more invested in the characters and the story#and I liked the music and gameplay better lol#earthbound definitely has a certain charm to it that mother 3 doesn’t have tho#i wish the eb party members talked to each other more bc I like them as a party more?? but not as characters if that makes sense#I’ll probably make a big rant later lol but man I loved it so much#ok yeah now that I think more on it#i think eb’s charm to me came from its color palette/dialogue/sound design#maybe if m3 gets an official Eng translation (hopefully by Marcus lindblom again???) it’d have more of that eb quirky feel#and then just the color palette they used in eb is really timeless and nostalgic looking if that makes sense#and then the SOUND DESIGN all the little ploops and beeps and the psi noises were so great#angle chat
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Man one of my friends has a habit of accidentally saying or doing stuff that hurts me and I never know what to do cuz like I dont wanna be criticizing her/telling her off every 2 days cuz I KNOW she never means any harm so I know when she says/does hurtfull stuff she doesnt mean it but like it still hurts yk ??? But anytime i do tell her i feel like an ass and the thing is it doesnt make me feel any better cuz when she apologizes i just feel bad for her. But likee also i notixe the frustration building up within myself from her repeatedly hurting my feelings. But its never super big stuff and i dont wanna make her feel bad cuz like idk man shes so. Just like, fragile I guess that anything that makes her sad or upset immediately makes me feel horrible like its the emotional equivalent of yelling at a child or.something. BUT ALSO SHE JUST KEEPS HURTING ME !!!! genuinely from the bottom of.my heart askimg wtf im supposed to do like do I just swallow it down and wait for the feeling to pass. Or what. Cuz like its never lingering serious hurt or anything but it just keeps building up but like also she never criticzes me for anything and so by comparison i DO already "criticize" her a lot I guess and like. Man idk genuinely I dont know what to do
#Ok so like for example. I was wathcing a show rn and a character died. and i had been texting my friend a bit about the show over the last#few days as i was watching it so its not like it just came completely out of the blue . and i sent like a video of the death scene and#said something expressinf sadness about it like 'NOOOO WTF' or whatever and she just didnt respond to that at all and started talking about#something else so i thought maybe she missed it so i like drew attention to it again and she was like 'i dont know that character i had#nothing to say'#BRO ????#I dont. know most of the things my friends ever talk about and i still go along.#and like she does stuff like that at least once a week and its like. idk man obviously its not a big deal but its just something that#stings yk??#and like she has a lot of idk mannerisms or habits that just make me feel dumb or like im being stupid and its so frustrating idk#and like idk cause sometimes she acts idk normally enthusiastic but randomly out of nowhere she says stuff that makes me feel like im being#stupid if that makes sense ??#or like she ALWAYS has something negative or disagreeing to say and on one hand it feels dumb to get annoyed by it but like idk??#for example one time i was watcbing a movie and texted her a pic of the lead actor and said 'his face is like the exavt opposite of mine'#like as a sort of joke cause my face is soft with idk prominent features and that guys face was sharp with well idk sharper features like#he just looked like the opposite of me yk?? and it was clearly a joke#but.like she replied like 'i dont really see it' and started in detail comparing our faces ??#and like idk cuz like it annoyed me and made me feel stupid and also she has a habit of overanalyzing her and other peooles.looks and i#fucking HATE IT#but like at the same time well if that was her organic reply am I not a dick for getting annoyed ??? but like it just annoyed me idfk#and its always stuff like that but i feek like an ass if im always tellinf her everything she does wrong (obviously i dont do that but itd#feel lime that) and being so idk overly critical but also some small part of me just has started to resent her cause ???#she keeps accidentally saying stuff that hurts me and makes me feel stupid and in school she always keeps touching me and making annoying#noises and like ???? idk what it is cause i usually really like her and we are very close but sometimes she just does stuff that#IMMEDIATELY drives me up the wall ????#but like honest to god what if im the problem. ?? like am i overreacting or like accidentally being mean??#But like . the way she communicates i dont see a point in trying to tell her that she has a habit of accidentally hurting me cuz#what would it change except make her feel bad if that makes sense ??#and also its like. like then she'd probably be less comfortable around me cuz shes worried abt hurting me . or like itd be#awkward like when you kmow someones only doing smth cuz you asked them to yk ??
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I just... had a random thought.
Now, some context, I'm a very platonic person. Ig i like romance, but i feel uncomfortable when reading about romantic intimate moments like kissing or the Big Thing (fucking basically) or anything like that.
But... I want... to fall in love? Love in a way where I can play hide-and-seek in shopping malls. Where we can mix-and-match clothing and rate each other's outfits in like Target or something. Where we can decorate our house. Where we can put up paintings and other pieces of art that we made for ourselves and each other. Where we can play pranks on each other. Where we can cook entire meals together even if it's just the two of us. Where we can come up with our own recipes and try the most ridiculous things. Where we can understand each other's trauma and triggers and not use them for the romantic intimate stuff. Where he's not afraid to show emotions and can feel safe with me just as I can feel safe with him.
I just want a person who understands me and I understand them, but we're more than just friends. Maybe it'll gradually build onto something more, maybe it won't, but I just romanticize the other moments. For me, love is intimate in different ways. And that's something which isn't always understood and instead gets provoked and teased.
Living in some certain places, you get judged harshly and be told that that's only for children and not proper love. Essentially, the couple is acting like children. You get told to "grow up" and "stop behaving like a child". It messes up some mentalities, those words. It messed up my mentality.
But, in the middle of the night, when I can't sleep, I just hold onto that hope where I can hopefully choose who I can be with, and that our relationship can be built on understanding and fun. Not just for the sake of creating children.
Idk why I suddenly had this thought, but it's not leaving me.
#yes im mostly talking about traditional families and forced marriages#there's a difference between arranged marriages and forced marriages#idm arranged but forced is a whole other thing#i think im just touch starved lmao#i like cuddling maybe idk never tried it#altho if someone put a blanket around me and started stroking my hair and i trust them i wouldnt mind#love#its weird#istg tho i never talk about these things cuz i not only get told that by adults but my peers at school too#who came up with the concept that relationships should only consist of sex and kisses?#cuz that's not ideal for everyone thank you very much#weird thoughts#if u find this cringe then pls ignore this
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also i always considered kh2 to be where sora was really letting his temper flare but i noticed that he was actually pretty mad in kh1 too so i suppose he was always like that
#like ofc he was always like that but like i thought it just came out more in 2 bc of the whole nobody buisness and everyone being confusing#and calling sora roxas and shit like i Got it then i too would be mad#but sora yelled at riku in neverland like YOURE STUPID lmao#and he got pretty mad at donald in tarzans world#but i feel like the instances when he got mad in that game were like. petty? childish#cuz hes 14 and this is all very new to him and he lost his world and hr doesnt know where his friends are and hes got this huge responsibili#responsibility on his shoulders and he just wants his friends back and to go home#like you know but in kh2 its more uhh?.....focused??? idk the word#nuanced?? maybe??#like it no longer childish fights with donald or fighting with a childhood friend that suddenly turned evil#like he Knows things now he saved the worlds once already and he woke up a year later suddenly taller and these people keep showing up actin#acting like they know him treating him like someone completely different andhes being told theyre just pure evil beings eith no heart so obv#obvsly they dont deserve respect and hes just mad bc hes trying to find riku and the king except he FOUND mickey but mickey wont tel him whe#where riku is and its all very Much#like you know i get it#i forgot my point but yeah#im having lots of kh thoughts again oh no#michi tag
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Thinking of resurrecting a podcast idea from 2020 for maybe something animated or just a chance to grow my writing and voice acting skills, everyone place your bets onto how well this'll go
#biggest obstacle is its an idea my ex came up with and i helped flesh out so#I'd have to break my two year silence and be like hey......... so..... can i use this idea or will you sue me <3#its not like a revolutionary idea so i could just come up with another one but like#im so shit at coming up with ideas tho so its like#im so good at running with them just not the conception#like i need a base#maybe ill write a cowboy story instead of a space story#space cowboys........#if i warp it enough maybe they wont noticr#no thats still#cuz then id have to come up with new characters etc#m. ill read my template and script for the first few episodes#midnighttalk#anyways idk#jot like i have time i just#need to make something#ik space podcasts r like super common but its more for me anyways#idk#thinking about it#i just want to challenge myself but not like overwork myself and this wpuld be perrrfect#anyways we'll see
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Hey uh what the actual fuck is wrong with the Iris route in aitsf????
#please help me#i just finished it and granted. i am so so so sleep deprived and out of my mind#but literally all of it was weird as shit??/?#lemme try to summarize#in mizukis psynch date finds iris dead body and later finds the body in the warehouse#so is the main suspect and he goes into sos mind and ends up saving iris#iris sticks with date and they get attacked by these guys on the way to marble#iris says shes being targeted by a secret cult#we go into her mind and theres 2 branching paths at the end but youre only given one choice and thats to believe iris#which i fucking dont believe her cuz its weird as shit and date is acting really weird at this point#but you have to believe her and my guess is that a second option gets unlocked later#afterwards we find out that pewter sent the guys after iris and that renju is possibly part of the evil cult#and both of them were in one falcos escape#iris is then kidnapped and we save her in a fever dream fight scene#she then tells date that renju came into her house that one night and tried to drag her into an abandoned factory#we go there and theres a psynch machine and iris starts dying and we go into her mind AGAIN#and it looks like we save her but then she dies anyways the end#plus she seemed like she was gonna ask us something important maybe date is her dad idk anymore#my theory is that this route takes place in a fucked up dream reality and its not real#because it all just feels super off#or this game is just really bad lol#i cant judge just yet i suppose but damn oof its given me a migraine#i gotta say im not very into iris maybe its just cuz im salty and confused but damn i just got tired of this bitch#kept waiting for her route to end lol#like i really dont know how any of this shit is gonna tie into the rest of the plot#its like i just started playing a completely different game man wtf#plus i hate iris and dates relationship cuz you really cant tell if you should call the fbi or not#is it familial or is date really gonna go after a fucking high school girl. either way i dont like#someone who knows this game please tell me if im going crazy or not#i miss the mizuki route it was perfect 😭
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